Whisper
by RedPandaPrincess
Summary: The year is 1989. Severus Snape has been Potions Master for 8 years after the Dark Lord killed Lily and James Potter. Our story follows a Slytherin student, Winifred Gray. She's a talented potioneer and Snape soon takes her under his wing as an apprentice. When a student disappears, it looks like Freddie is in trouble and Snape may be the only one who can help her...
1. Chapter 1

WHISPER

A Harry Potter fanfic

**Author's Note: I wasn't going to publish this until I was sure I would finish it but I've filled two notebooks already and cant wait! So buckle up cuz it's going to be a long, amazing ride! **

As the Hogwarts Express pulled out of the station, Freddie kicked off her sneakers and put her feet up on the seat.

"Oi Freddie, nobody wants to smell your feet, ya troll," said the curly-haired boy sitting next to her. He pushed her feet off the seat and Freddie screwed up her face and stuck her tongue out at him.

"Shove off, Daniel, you know you love it," she said, putting her feet up again.

"Seriously, were you raised in a barn?"

"If only!" she joked. "If you don't like it, go sit over there."

Daniel rolled his eyes, picked up his book, and went to the other side of the compartment.

"You're an animal," he said scathingly.

"Thanks," she said with a grin, stretching out in the now-vacated seat.

"Ooh I have something for you," he said, opening the trunk at his feet.

Freddie opened one eye to see Daniel pulling out a record player.

"More Muggle crap?" she groaned.

"Oh come on, you loved Guns and Roses!" he declared.

"Love is a strong word," she said, putting one arm behind her head.

"Well, you'll love this one," he said, pulling out a record. He set the needle and a song started to play.

"_Rat-tailed jimmy is a secondhand hood, he deals out in Hollywood. Got a '65 Chevy primed flames traded for some powdered goods. Jigsaw Jimmy he's running a gang, but I hear he's doing okay. Got a cozy little job, sells the Mexican mob packages of candy cane. He's the one they call Dr Feelgood, he's the one that makes ya feel alright. He's the one they call Dr Feelgood."_

"Hey I know this band. You played them before. Muddy Crew?" Freddie asked, rolling onto her side.

"_Motley _Crue!" Daniel corrected, laughing.

"Whatever," she said, sitting back up.

"You can't help it, you weren't raised properly," he teased.

"You can say that again," she laughed harshly. "My uncle would hex me ten ways to Tuesday if he knew I'd so much as _listened _to a Muggle band."

"Purebloods," Daniel said, shaking his head.

"Yeah, lucky I've got you here to set me straight," she said with a grin.

She pulled a book out of her trunk and started flipping through it.

"Really, Winifred? Studying? We've finished our OWLs and NEWTs aren't until next year!"

"_Don't _call me Winifred!" she flared, causing the lighting in the compartment to flicker.

"Temper, temper. Like a first year who can't control their magic," he teased.

"Oh shut up!" she growled, drawing her knees up in front of her. "Just because we're friends doesn't mean I won't kill you!"

There was a scramble outside the compartment and Freddie jumped up. She slid the door open just in time to see several scrawny first years, running for their lives. Freddie chuckled and slid the door shut again.

"A Slytherin killing a Mudblood? So original," Daniel said sardonically.

Freddie glowered at him a moment, then they both burst out laughing.

"You're not a Mudblood – if so you'd be in Gryffindor or _Hufflepuff_. Not Ravenclaw," she reasoned. "You're too smart to be a Mudblood."

"That's just racist, Freddie. Besides, I _could _be a Mudblood. My mom won't tell me anything about my father."

"You're a man now, Daniel! You're almost 17! You'd think she'd give it up."

"Maybe she doesn't know," he said, leaning down to dig through his trunk.

"Oh, so your mom's a whore?" she said cheekily, then quickly ducked as he threw a shoe at her head.

"I really hate you," he said, shaking his head.

"You love me," she said, picking up the book she'd dropped. "Anyway this isn't a textbook. It's a book my aunt and uncle gave me for my birthday."

"And you're _actually _reading it?" he asked, intrigued. He came to sit back beside her and peeked at the title of the book. "_Baneful Brews_? Think you're gonna impress Snape with that?"

Freddie let out a bark of laughter.

"Snape would string me up in the dungeons if he caught me with this, Slytherin or not!" she laughed.

"Mm hmm and you'd let him just so he could see up your skirt."

"Don't be a perv," she said, smacking him with the book, but she was grinning.

"You know you'd love it," he said with a smirk. "So, what's in the book?"

#

They spent the next hour looking over the various poisons and illegal potions, pondering how difficult they'd be to make, while listening to Daniel's record.

"I've still got a contact at Borgin and Burke's I could probably get _that _no problem," Freddie said, pointing to a page.

There was a knock on the door and Freddie quickly stashed her book away.

"Anything off the trolley?" asked the witch with the snack cart.

"No ma'am," Daniel said politely.

Freddie stood, digging for money in her pocket.

"A packet of Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans and two chocolate frogs," she said sharply. The witch gave her the candy, Freddie gave her the money then slammed the compartment door shut.

"Would it kill you to be nice?" Daniel asked as she tossed him a chocolate frog.

"Hey, I bought you a chocolate frog," she reasoned.

"I _meant _would it kill you to be nice to someone _other _than me?"

"Oh. Probably," she said with a shrug.

Daniel laughed and unwrapped his candy.

As it started to get dark outside, they changed into their school robes.

"Have you heard anything about the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher?" he asked, pulling on his Ravenclaw robes.

"I dunno my uncle said it's some dud. Gunther something," Freddie said, wrapping her gray and green scarf around her neck.

"You know they say the position is cursed? No one lasts a year, not since _He_..."

"The Dark Lord?"

"Yeah. Since he's gone no one's lasted more than a year as Defense teacher," he said. "They should give it to Snape, everyone knows he wanted it."

"He's brilliant at Potions though," Freddie said, looking out the window. "I wouldn't want anyone else to teach me."

"Yeah but they say he was a Death Eater," Daniel said quietly.

Freddie looked at him sharply. Daniel knew her parents had been Death Eaters. They were currently serving a life sentence in Azkaban while she'd been sent to live with her aunt and uncle, who'd been smart enough not to get themselves shipped off to prison.

"No, Freddie, not- I didn't- I just meant, he'd be good to teach Defense don't you think?"

"Mm," she agreed, turning to look back out the window. "I'd love to have him teach me a thing or two about the Dark Arts."

#

They got off the train together and followed the stream of students to the carriages. Daniel jumped onto the back of a carriage, then offered his hand to help her up. Freddie scoffed and smacked his hand away.

"Bugger off," she said, jumping into the carriage beside him.

"Just trying to be a gentleman," he said.

"Daniel Byrd, a gentleman?" called another voice. A blonde-haired boy with freckles appeared and hopped into their carriage.

"Hey, Geck. Good summer?" Daniel asked his housemate.

"Not bad. How'd you do on your OWLs?" Geck asked.

"Eh I got Outstanding in Care of Magical Creatures, Charms, Herbology and Astronomy. As in everything else," he answered.

"Wait, you only got Acceptable in Potions? But you had the Potions Princess tutoring you!" Geck exclaimed.

"Trust me, Geck, I've been giving him hell about it all summer via owl," Freddie said, shaking her head.

"Snape's a hard-ass," Daniel said defensively.

"At least you two don't need brains to play Quidditch," she retorted.

"What about you, Gray, how'd you do?" Geck asked.

"Outstanding in everything except Divination, which is a load of crap," she said, a little smugly.

"Ugh, you suck! How are you not in Ravenclaw?" Geck complained.

"Cuz she's got golden blood or whatever," Daniel teased.

"Shut up, stupid," Freddie laughed, kicking him lightly.

#

A short while later they were in the Great Hall. Daniel and Geck had gone to sit with the Ravenclaws and Freddie was sitting among her peers at the Slytherin table. She made small talk with them until the Sorting started, then she stared idly at the teachers table.

Well, not idly. Really she was focused on one teacher. Severus Snape. His dark hair and darker eyes that always seemed to draw Freddie in. Not just his looks, but his _mind_. He was brilliant. Her classmates couldn't see past his cold, sometimes cruel, demeanor. But Freddie could and she hung on his every word. She was the only person who noticed that the directions Snape wrote on the blackboard were different than the ones in the book. _Better_.

Freddie's stomach growled and she glanced at the empty plates on the table.

_I wish this stupid Hat would hurry up_, she thought irritably, glancing at the small child on the stood who was waiting to be sorted. _I should've gotten more candy. _

She looked back up at Snape who was watching the Sorting with the same expression of disinterest he looked at everything with.

_There's got to be something more behind that gaze, _Freddie thought, tapping her fingers on the table. _Maybe not right now, I mean I'm sure he's as bored as I am with the Sorting but he's just a...a Void. All the time. He has to have some kind of feelings. He's so brilliant. What's he hiding behind that pale mask?_

Snape's eyes seemed to flick to hers and Freddie quickly looked away. She forced her gaze to the Ravenclaw table. Daniel caught her eyes and mimed vomiting.

Freddie grinned at him, then carefully looked back up at the staff table. Snape's gaze was back on the Sorting.

Finally Dumbledore stood up and all eyes fell on him.

"Welcome back to another year at Hogwarts – and for our newcomers, welcome! I know you're all hungry so I'll keep this sort – dig in."

Food filled the plates before her and Freddie began to eat in an unceremonious manner, shoveling food in her face like she was never allowed to do at home. At home it was all proper manners, folded napkins, and a different utensil for each different type of food. Her classmates looked amused as she mixed peas in with her mashed potatoes, stirring in macaroni and cheese, then poured gravy over the lot of it. She didn't care if they laughed at her. Hogwarts was where she could truly be herself. She wished she never had to go home.

When the feast was over Freddie was full and ready for bed. She was dozing slightly as Dumbledore gave his speech and was startled awake when they were dismissed and everyone started to leave.

Daniel weaved his way through the crowd of students and met her in the Entrance Hall.

"Good feast, yeah?" he said, nudging her.

"Mm-hm," she said sleepily.

"Reckon food's the only thing that'll take your attention off of Professor S-"

"Shut it," she hissed, elbowing him in the ribs. "What if someone hears you? Besides, I _wasn't_."

"Uh-huh," he said, amused. "You're a bad liar."

"I am an _excellent _liar. I'm a Slytherin _thank _you very much," she said smugly.

Daniel laughed loudly, the sound echoing through the hall.

"Goodnight, Freddie. See ya at breakfast," he said, clapping her on the shoulder before ascending the Grand Staircase. Freddie waved at him and turned to follow her housemates to the dungeons.

#

The next morning at breakfast the Heads of Houses handed out the schedules. Freddie poured over her schedule enthusiastically while she sipped her coffee. She was thrilled to see her first class would be her NEWT-level Potions class. She watched across the hall as Flitwick handed out the Ravenclaw schedules. As soon as he reached Daniel, Freddie rushed over.

"Gimme," she demanded, snatching the parchment from her friend before he'd even finished reading it.

"What the hell, Freddie?"

"You're not in Potions?" she demanded.

"Uhh, I guess not."

"That's bullshit!" she declared, jumping up. She made a beeline for Snape and Daniel followed at a cautious distance.

"Freddie it's really not- I-"

"Professor Snape!"

Snape stopped mid-stride and turned to face her.

"Miss Gray?"

"Why isn't Daniel in Potions?" she demanded, thrusting his schedule towards Snape. Snape's eyes flicked to the paper but he didn't take it.

"Mr Byrd did not meet the OWL requirements to continue my class," he said in a bored voice.

"But he's _great _at Potions, he's just a crappy test-taker, sir."

"It's fine, Freddie, I don't want-"

"Shut up," she snapped at Daniel.

"None of you are 'great' at Potions Miss Gray. I only accept NEWT level students who achieved an Outstanding on their OWLs. Mr Byrd did not-"

"But sir, I can help him study-"

"_Enough_, Miss Gray. I will not be accepting your boyfriend into my class no matter how much you _beg_."

"I do _not _beg!" she flared and a crackle of magical energy raised her hair. "And he's _not _my boyfriend."

Snape smirked at her loss of control.

"Freddie come on," Daniel pleaded.

"_Leave _Miss Gray and let me eat my breakfast in peace before you find yourself off my class roster as well," Snape said in a dangerous tone.

Daniel grabbed her arm and quickly let go as he received a small electric shock.

"Come on, Freddie, let's go eat," Daniel said and she allowed herself to be led away.

"Pretentious ass," Freddie muttered as soon as they were out of earshot.

"Jesus, Freddie, you've got balls. Either that or you're just plain stupid. I know you're no Ravenclaw but you should know better than to provoke Snape."

"I was _not-_"

"You _were_. You went in guns blazing. You've got a death wish, Fred."

"Oh whatever," she grumbled. "Potions is gonna suck now. And you _love _Potions!"

"Well it's an alright subject, but it's _fine_," he insisted. "You know Care of Magical Creatures is my favorite. We'll still have that and some other classes together. It'll be fine. I'll see you after Potions, okay? I've got a free period now, I'm gonna get a head start on McGonagall's textbook."

"Fine," Freddie said dramatically. "I'll see you later."

Daniel grinned and then headed back to the Ravenclaw table. Freddie sat back down at her table, fuming.

"Not great at Potions," she muttered. "I'll show him..."


	2. Chapter 2

After breakfast Freddie headed down to the dungeons with her bag slung over her shoulder. She'd already looked through her Potions textbook, as soon as she'd gotten it, but she knew Snape wasn't a 'by the book' teacher. He could probably write the books better than any of the old farts who did. The thought brought a smile to Freddie's face as she took a seat at the table closest to Snape's desk, the same spot she'd sat every year since her first year at Hogwarts.

Freddie looked around to see who else had made it into the advanced class. Three of her Slytherin classmates – Maggie Hicks, Christine Gibbs, and Alexander Foxx. Two Ravenclaw boys, Richard Perkins and Leo Carroll. And a single Hufflepuff girl, Daisy Greene. Greene, she reflected, must have gotten lucky on the exam. She'd never had a Potions class with the Hufflepuffs but during their Herbology class last year the idiot girl had somehow poisoned herself with Bane berry in the Greenhouse.

_Only 7 of us, _Freddie thought. _This is going to be interesting. _

The door slammed shut and Snape walked in, his black robes billowing around him.

"Sixth year," he began, his voice low and silky. "Some students think that, because your OWLs are over and your NEWT exams aren't until next year, that this is a year to slack off. You think that you will get more sleep, goof off with you friends instead of spending time studying. If that is your plan I suggest you take you things and leave this classroom. _Now_."

His eyes glittered as they passed over each one of them. No one got up. No one moved a muscle. His eyes lingered on Freddie as he continued to speak. A shiver went through her and she grew warm inside.

"Seven. Only seven students out of nearly 150 of your year have made it into this _elite _class. Now that we have weeded out the _idiots_-" The corners of his mouth twitched into a smirk, looking directly at Freddie. "-we can begin to delve further into more complex, sophisticated brews your peers could never _dream _of mastering."

The warm, pleasant feeling his voice sent through her had disappeared the moment his backhanded insult to Daniel hit her ears. He turned his back to them to write on the blackboard and Freddie glared daggers at his back.

"I expect nothing less than perfection from each and every one of you," he said as he finished writing and turned back to face them. "Should your performance fail to live up to my expectations you will be removed from my roster immediately and indefinitely. Do _not _disappoint me. Begin."

All seven students stood and hurried to the storage cupboard for ingredients. Freddie gathered everything she would need for the Draught of Living Death. She got to work quickly and efficiently. She crushed 13 sopophorus beans and poured the juice into a beaker, then set to work on measuring the other ingredients.

#

A short while later Freddie had tied her dark hair back and shed her outer robes in an effort to cool down so sweat wouldn't drip into her cauldron. This brew was more intricate than anything she'd attempted before, but she was pulling it off. Her potion was the exact shade of black described on the board and in the textbook. She'd scribbled Snape's alternate instructions into the margins of her textbook so she wouldn't have to keep looking up and so she'd have the notes to study later.

Freddie couldn't help but smile smugly as she added the sopophorus bean juice, knowing that she was doing precisely what she was supposed to as the potion began to lighten.

She saw Snape's legs as he stopped to examine her cauldron. She didn't look up, she was focused on her work, but she smiled, knowing there was no way he could find fault with her work. But still he didn't move. After a moment she looked up, just in time to see Snape grab a flash from Carroll's desk and dump it into her cauldron.

"What the Hell!" she shouted as her potion began to smoke and turn black.

"Language, Miss Gray! Now – _fix it_," he said, walking away.

Freddie looked at Carroll, who looked bewildered, a knife in hand and several sopophorus beans in front of him.

"How much juice was in the beaker?" she demanded.

"Wh-I-I don't-"

"How many beans?!"

"T-three, I'm having trouble crushing-"

"Because you're using a stone blade and not a silver dagger, _idiot_," she snapped.

Her brain worked quickly, calculating how much of each ingredient she'd need to counteract what he'd done. She scribbled the numbers on the bottom of the page of her textbook.

She could feel her classmates eyes on her as she began to cut more Valerian roots and measure essence of Wormwood.

_Focus, _she told herself sternly. _Hands steady. You can do this. _

"Eyes on your own work," Snape said sternly. "Mr Foxx, one would think you'd be more interested in your potion burning than in Miss Gray chopping roots."

There was a frantic scrambling but Freddie tuned it out.

_Focus, _she told herself. _You've got this. Don't give him the satisfaction..._

At the end of the class period, Snape swept through the classroom, peering into everyone's cauldron. He made a few scathing remarks but no one had failed completely. He saved Freddie's cauldron for last and when he stopped she smiled up at him defiantly. Her potion was the perfect shade of pale pink.

"Well done, Miss Gray," he said in a low voice. He spoke up, giving out a homework assignment that they all scribbled down before the bell rang. "Class dismissed."

In that moment, it didn't matter that he had tried to sabotage her potion or that he'd insulted her best friend. Those four words of praise and she was on Cloud Nine. Freddie felt like she was floating as she cleared her work station and pulled her robe on to leave the classroom.

Her Slytherin housemates flocked around her as soon as they got out of the classroom.

"That was amazing!"

"Intense-"

"How did you fix it?"

"I can't believe he did that!"

"Hey, I'll catch up with you guys in a minute, okay?" Freddie said, brushing them off. She waited outside the classroom until the Ravenclaws came out. They started to brush past her but she caught Carroll's arm.

"Hey, Carroll- I'm uh, sorry about snapping at you, it wasn't you fault, I was just-"

"Oh! No worries. I, uh, I probably would've done the same thing if Snape did that to me. That was crazy!" he said, giving her a grin. "And you, you _rocked _that! Congratulations."

"Thanks," she said, smiling slightly. "See you in Transfiguration."

When Freddie reached McGonagall's classroom, Daniel was waiting for her. He'd saved her a seat and waved her over.

"Hey, I heard you were a rock star today! How was it?"

Freddie grinned broadly.

"I was a _total rock star._ I kicked that potion's ass! _And _Snape complimented me!"

"What, like he said you were pretty?" he teased.

"Complimented my _potion, _you tool," she laughed, smacking him with her Transfiguration textbook.

The classroom filled around them as Freddie told Daniel about everything that had happened in Potions. Transfiguration had a great many more students than Potions and the room was nearly as full as usual, but it was a mix of all four houses.

"Do you think he was trying to sabotage you?" Daniel asked, lowering his voice as McGonagall entered the room.

"I dunno. Maybe. Or maybe it was a test."

"Well if it was, you passed it."

"With flying colors," she whispered, then they stopped talking as McGonagall began to speak.


	3. Chapter 3

They left Transfiguration an hour and a half later with a mountain of homework on Summoning Spells.

"I've got a free period before lunch, wanna get started on this homework?" Freddie asked. "We could go to the Great Hall."

"Actually I've got Divination before lunch."

"_Divination_? Daniel, seriously?"

"Hey, it's an easy NEWT," he said with a shrug. "All you have to do is make up a bunch of hokey doom and gloom crap and Trelawney eats it up."

"It's a rubbish subject, but good luck with that. I'll see you at lunch then."

"Yep. Later, Freddie."

Freddie took her books down to the Slytherin Common Room, since Daniel wasn't with her. It was quiet there, only a handful of older students milling about. She sat at one of the tables close to a window looked out under the lake. The giant squid swooshed by and Freddie smiled and waved to it.

She set her books on the table and pondered which homework to start first. Transfiguration would be harder, no doubt, and more challenging. And if she got a head start she could help Daniel later on.

Still she found herself picking up the Potions textbook and flipping to the section on antidotes. She knew the antidote for most sleeping potions was the Wiggenweld Potion. It was one of the first potions she'd learned to brew in her first year at Hogwarts.

That sparked something and she stood suddenly. She left her things and went into the girls dormitory. She opened her trunk and dug through it until she found her copy of _Magical Drafts and Potions _by Arsenius Jigger. She took it back to the Common Room, flipping through it as she walked back to her seat.

"Ah _yes_," she said under her breath as she found the potion recipe, complete with the notes she'd written in the margins.

_Thank you nerdy first year me, _she thought happily. _And thank you, Severus Snape. _

#

Almost an hour later, students came pouring into the Common Room but Freddie tuned them out. She was 20 inches into an assignment that was only supposed to be 16 inches of parchment long. She was finished a paragraph on alternative antidotes when Maggie Hicks tapped her shoulder.

"Lunch, Freddie," she said.

"Huh? Oh, thanks," she said, closing her books. She re-read her last paragraph silently and nodded to herself. "That'll do."

"Is that a first year Potions textbook?" Maggie asked as Freddie put her books away.

"Yeah it had some notes in it that I needed for my essay for Professor Snape."

"You finished it already?"

"Yeah, it was no biggie."

Maggie looked at her like she was crazy and let out a laugh.

"You know they call you Potions Princess?" Maggie asked as they left the Common Room.

"Yeah," Freddie said with a grin. "I know."

As soon as they walked into the Great Hall, Daniel waved her over to the Ravenclaw Table. Freddie bade goodbye to Maggie and joined her friend at his table.

"I've never known you to be late for lunch," Daniel said, scooting over to make room for her.

"Yeah, I was finishing my Potions homework," she said, stealing half a sandwich from his plate.

"You're such an over-achiever," he said, nudging her playfully.

"Yeah, maybe. How was your Divination class? You predict the future? Maybe you could give me a heads up on tomorrow's homework," she teased.

"I wish!" he laughed. "I could use the upper hand."

"You've got Charms with me after lunch, right?" she asked through a mouthful of food.

"_Yes_, and don't talk with your mouth full, you animal."

Freddie made a face then stuck her tongue out at him, showing him a chewed up wad of food.

"Animal," he said, shoving her. "You got a free period before dinner, too?"

"Mm-hm."

"You wanna go fly before dinner?"

"Hell yeah! But what about homework?"

"We can do homework _after _dinner," he reasoned. "And besides, we can practice in the meantime. Look – _Accio _goblet!"

A goblet of tea came shooting across the table and dumped all over him. Freddie and a few surrounding Ravenclaws laughed loudly.

"Well, that was stupid," Daniel said, dabbing the front of his robes with a napkin.

"Totally," Freddie agreed.

#

Charms class felt particularly long. The first half hour was Flitwick lecturing on the difficulty of NEWT level classes, then introducing them to nonverbal spells. They spent the remainder of the hour practicing nonverbal levitation charms. Despite her concentration and flawless wand movements, Freddie had barely been able to move her feather an inch. Daniel hadn't fared much better.

They were both glad when the class was over and they practically fled the castle. They ran to the Quidditch pitch, laughing as they dumped their bags on the bleachers and shed their outer robes.

"_Accio _broomstick," Daniel said, pointing his wand at the broom shed. A broom came barreling towards him and he grabbed it in mid air.

"Bet you can't do that non-verbally," she snorted as he leapt on and hovered over her.

"I'd like to see _you_ try," he teased, circling overhead.

She pulled out her wand, pointing it at the shed, and screwed up her face in concentration. She pictured a broom in her mind – not just any broom, but the _Moonsweeper_, a gift from her uncle when she tried out for Quidditch in her second year. She hadn't made the team but it wasn't for lack of skill. The Slytherin Quidditch team was notorious for not letting girls on the team.

_Accio Moonsweeper, _she thought determinedly. Nothing happened.

She tried again and this time heard a clatter. She hurried over to look inside, Daniel still circling lazily overhead.

"It fell over," Freddie scoffed, picking her broom up off the floor.

"At least it moved," he reasoned. "Come on already!"

Freddie stowed her wand in her pocket and mounted her broom. She ascended swiftly and met Daniel at the top of the goalposts.

"Race you to the Astronomy Tower," she said and they took off.

"Hey, no fair!" he said, zooming after her.

"Last one there's a rotten flobberworm," she called over her shoulder.

Her hair came loose from the ponytail and fanned out behind her as she streaked across the sky. It felt good to fly, the fresh air and sunshine on her face after a day indoors.

Freddie beat Daniel to the Astronomy Tower by a good three feet. She let out a whoop as her feet brushed the tile.

"You had a head start!" Daniel said as he caught up.

"Did not. If I was in Ravenclaw I'd have your spot on the team in a heartbeat. I'd be an excelled Chaser."

"Not my spot! You can have Geck's," he joked.

"Yeah and I'd be a better captain that him too – 'Mount up you lazy maggots! Get those balls in the air before I cram em up your ass!'"

"You sound like Maxwell!" Daniel laughed.

"He's a good Captain, even if he is a sexist pig. There's a reason Slytherin wins the Quidditch Cup every year, even without _me _on the team."

"Wanna get a Quaffle and shoot some goals?"

"Sure."

"Race you back!" he said, speeding off.

#

When the smell of food wafted across the grounds, they called their match. In the end it had been a tie, 40-40.

"We can have a rematch tomorrow after Herbology," Daniel said as they stowed their broomsticks and got their things.

"Can't, I've got Potions again," she said happily.

"Ah, right. Maybe before dinner tomorrow then."

"If we're not drowning in homework," she agreed.

They ate dinner with their respective houses. Once the hall started to clear out some, Freddie joined Daniel at the Ravenclaw table and they hit the books.

"We have a double Transfiguration on Wednesday so we should start with that," Freddie said, pulling out her notes from McGonagall's class. "Charms isn't due til Friday so it won't be the worst thing in the world if we don't get to it tonight."

Daniel nodded in agreement, opening his textbook for them to share.

Several hours later the Great Hall was completely empty besides the pair of them. They had a mountain of schoolwork before them. They'd finished McGonagall's homework and started on Charms. They were practicing nonverbal charms when the door opened and Snape strode in.

"It's ten minutes until curfew, Miss Gray. What are the two of you doing?" he asked, eyeing them suspiciously.

"Homework, sir. We're practicing nonverbal charms," Freddie answered.

"Oh?" he said, arching his eyebrow. "Let's see then."

Freddie immediately began to sweat as she picked up her wand. She focused on the quill in front of her.

_Wingardium Leviosa, _she thought with a swish and flick of her wrist. To her dismay, nothing happened. It didn't move even a fraction of an inch.

"Well?" Snape asked snidely, a smirk on his lips.

Frustration bubbling, Freddie tried again.

_Wingardium Leviosa. _

Nothing.

Snape's smirk grew wider.

_Wingardium Leviosa. _

_ WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA you stupid piece of crap!_

The inkwell next to her quill shattered and the ink began to spread across the table. Daniel hastily moved his Transfiguration essay out of the way.

"Darn it! _Evanesco_," Freddie said, vanishing the ink from the table.

"I take it you weren't intending to explode your inkwell?" Snape asked coolly.

"No _sir_," Freddie said through clenched teeth.

Snape clicked his tongue disappointedly. He pulled his wand from his pocket and without a sound repaired the shattered glass. Then he flicked his wand and levitated the quill in front of her. With a graceful turn of his bony wrist he signed his name on her parchment.

"Brilliant," Freddie breathed in awe.

"What about you, Mr Byrd? Have you mastered nonverbal spells?" Snape asked.

"N-no sir," Daniel said, looking down.

"Show me."

Daniel picked up his wand and exhaled slowly. He screwed up his face in concentration. He flicked his wrist and his quill gave a half-hearted jump, but didn't fully leave the table.

"Pathetic," Snape sneered. "Yet still more progress than Miss Gray has made."

Freddie felt her face flush and she glared at Snape, biting her tongue.

"While I can't deny you both need the practice, that is no excuse for being out past curfew. 10 points from Ravenclaw and Slytherin."

Freddie looked across the hall where the House hourglasses stood. She watched the gems ascend and cursed inwardly.

"Now, bed. Both of you. If I catch you out again, it'll be detention."

Freddie nodded as they quickly packed their things. Snape lingered and followed them out of the Great Hall.

"Night Fred," Daniel muttered and quickly headed up the staircase.

"We could've made it back to our dorms in 10 minutes," Freddie said once Daniel was gone.

Snape arched an eyebrow.

"You, perhaps, but Mr Byrd would not have made it back to Ravenclaw Tower before 10 o'clock," he said smoothly.

"So why did _I _have to lose points?" she muttered darkly.

"To remind you _both _to be more attentive to the time," he answered, then paused a moment. "I awarded you 30 points for your work in my class this morning."

"You did? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I believe I just did. Goodnight, Miss Gray," he said, walking away from her towards the entrance to the grounds.

"Goodnight, Professor Snape," Freddie said softly, then headed into the dungeons where she belonged.

Freddie lay in her bed a short while later, thinking about the events of the day. She had the curtains half-drawn around her bed so that she could stare out the window into the lake. She liked watching the creatures drift past.

As she started to drift off, she heard an eerie song begin. It was muffled by the glass but she recognized it as mermaids singing. The gray-skinned creatures often peered back through the windows into the Slytherin Common Room and dorms, frightening younger students with their unusual appearance.

Freddie had never been afraid of them. Each year she chose a bed close to the lake so that, if she was lucky, she would get to hear the mermaids beautiful songs. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep with a smile on her lips.


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning Freddie and Daniel made their way down to the Greenhouses after breakfast. It was a foggy morning and unseasonably cool for September. Freddie yawned and pulled her cloak tighter around herself as they walked.

"Tired?" Daniel asked.

"Cold makes me feel sleepy," she said, trying to suppress another yawn. "Do you think it's gonna rain?"

"I hope not – then I won't get to kick your butt on the Quidditch pitch this evening!"

Freddie scoffed at him.

"As if! I'll kill you out there, rain or shine!"

"Okay, well, don't blame me if you slip off your broom and fall in the mud."

She gave him a scathing look and punched him in the arm.

"Ow!" he said loudly.

"Don't be such a baby," she said as they joined the small crowd of students waiting on Professor Sprout.

"Did Snape give you any more trouble after I left last night?"

"Actually, no. He told me he gave me 30 points for my impressive performance in his class yesterday," she said proudly.

"Wow! Really? Did he actually say he was impressed?"

"Well, no. But he totally was. I could tell."

"Uh-huh."

"Good morning ladies and gentlemen!" said the cheery voice of Professor Sprout as she approached. "Welcome to Advanced Herbology. We'll be in Greenhouse 6 today."

The group of about 30 students followed her to Greenhouse 6. Intricate metal serpents adorned the top of the building and the door.

"Homey," Freddie murmured with a grin and Daniel smiled.

"Before I unlock this door, I must impress upon you all the importance of appropriate PPE – Personal Protective Equipment. Dragonhide gloves _must _be worn at all times. If your gloves are damaged – any rips or worn spots – let me know immediately before we proceed."

She paused a moment while everyone retrieved their gloves and inspected them.

"Your hands and arms must be kept covered at all times. Before we enter I'll need each of you to cast a Bubblehead Charm on yourselves. This will give you a continuous supply of fresh, filtered oxygen and protect not only your lungs but your eyes as well. If you have difficulty with the charm, step forward and I'll apply it for you."

Freddie and Daniel exchanged a curious look before pulling out their wands. Freddie pointed her wand to her temple.

"_Capubulla,_" she said, circling her head with her wand.

A thick, clear bubble appeared around her head and the world around her became slightly muffled.

"Serious stuff," Daniel said through his own bubble, his voice distorted. Freddie nodded in agreement.

They watched Professor Sprout apply the last few Charms before applying her own.

"Now," Sprout said loudly. "I know it's a little harder to hear so be sure you pay close attention and I'll try to make myself as clear as possible."

She turned to the door and did a complex wand movement that unlocked the door.

"This is Greenhouse 6. Everything in this Greenhouse-" she pushed the door open. "-_can _kill you."

There were murmurs of excitement and apprehension as the class followed her inside. The air inside was thick, heavy, and _hot. _There were dozens of plants – mushrooms, vines, even flowers.

"If anyone begins to feel ill – dizzy, weak, nauseous, even a headache – it's _imperative _that you inform me immediately – before it's too late. Everyone clear on that?"

Professor Sprout made sure every single one of them nodded or acknowledged verbally before continuing.

"Now," she said, lifting a tray of seedlings and putting them on the table before her. "Who can tell me what these are?"

A few hands went up, including Freddie's. She knew exactly what they were.

"Mr Foxx?" Sprout asked, nodding to him.

"They look like Juvenile Boom Berry bushes, ma'am," he answered.

"Correct! Now, who can tell me what they're used for?"

Less hands this time, but Freddie kept hers held high.

"Miss Gray?"

"Boom berries are one of the primary ingredients used in the Wiggenweld Potion, a powerful healing potion that can heal severe injuries. It's also the antidote to most Sleeping Draught overdoses and can be used to reverse the effects of _The Draught of Living Death. _The name Boom Berry comes from the fact that if you try to pick one before it's ripe – before it turns dark purple – it will explode in your hand and burn you. If you're not wearing dragonhide gloves, you could lose a finger or two."

"_Exactly _right, Miss Gray. 10 points to Slytherin," Sprout said, beaming.

"Potions Princess," someone muttered and there were a few chuckles around the table. Freddie just grinned.

"Today we'll be adding fertilizer to the seedlings – work in pairs," Sprout said as she passed out the pots. "Anyone care to guess what we'll be using as fertilizer?"

"Mooncalf dung?" suggested a Hufflepuff girl.

"Good guess, Miss Marsh, but no," Sprout said.

"Dragon dung," Freddie said before anyone else could answer.

"Attagirl, Gray. I've just gotten a fresh shipment from Romania. Mooncalf dung _is _a very powerful fertilizer but it's harder to come by and there are more delicate plants I prefer to use it on. Dragon dung works just as well for something like this. And it's something dragons have _a lot _of and they don't mind giving it away," Sprout said with a chuckle. "Now, let's get started..."

#

They left the greenhouse an hour later and Freddie immediately removed her Bubblehead Charm. She took a deep breath of fresh air and pushed her sweaty hair back from her forehead.

"Dammit," she groaned. "_Scourgify_."

She shoved the now-clean gloves into her bag.

"What's wrong? That wasn't so bad," Daniel said.

"No, but I have Potions next with Snape and I'm sweaty and gross and I smell like _dung_. I haven't got time to shower."

"He made your schedule, he knows you had Herbology this morning. Honestly, he probably won't notice or care that you smell like dung."

"_I _care, Daniel. _I _care."

He looked at her pityingly and shook his head.

"Alright, hold still," he said, pulling out his wand. "_Scourgify_."

Freddie felt the force of his spell remove the sweat and grime from her skin and robes.

"There's another one, hang on – _Mundetto_," he said, waving his wand over her hair. Her hair dried from the sweat and fell in soft waves around her shoulders.

"Wow," she said, touching her black hair.

"Yeah it's like dry shampoo but it's a spell."

"Dry shampoo?" she asked, confused.

"Oh it's a Muggle thing. It doesn't feel as good as washing your hair, but it feels better than _not _washing your hair. The spell is better."

"Where'd you learn that?"

"Eh, sometimes I don't feel like taking a shower."

"Ew, gross," she laughed. "Boys are disgusting."

"I'm disgusting? You're the one that smells like dung."

"No! Do I really?" she asked, sniffing herself.

"A bit still, yeah. Sorry. You're a girl, don't you have perfume and makeup and junk?"

"Wha- when have you _ever _seen me wear makeup?"

"Uhh..."

"Oh! I might have something actually," she said, stopping for a moment to dig through her bag.

"Your Potions kit?" Daniel asked, bemused.

"Hush, hold this," she said, pushing the kit into his hands while she rummaged through it. She pulled out a small vial of Honeysuckle Essence and uncorked it. She splashed some on the front of her robes and dabbed it on her wrists.

"Better?" she asked Daniel.

"Yeah – ooh, dab some behind your ears," he said and she gave him an odd look. "What? I've seen girls do that."

She nodded and did what he said. She recorked the bottle and shoved the kit back into her bag.

"Thanks, Daniel. I gotta go, I can't be late."

"Go, go," he encouraged. "Go be a rock star! I'll see you after."

"Go take a shower, you smell like dung!" she called teasingly over her should as she ran inside.

Despite her worry that she'd be late, Freddie was the first to arrive in the Potions classroom. Snape was at his desk, reading something, and didn't even look up when she entered.

"Good morning, Professor Snape," she said cheerfully as she put her bag down on her desk. She opened her bag and got out her Potions homework. She glanced over it one final time before placing it on Snape's desk.

"What's this?" he asked absently.

"My homework," she answered, sitting down at her desk.

"It appears to be longer than 16 inches," he said dryly.

"Yeah I got a little carried away. I'm sorry, sir."

"Mm," he grunted. "Better than this first year drivel. They don't know their cauldrons from a _tea kettle_."

"Well they're first years, what d'you expect?" she said with a smirk

For a moment, she thought he might smile back but he didn't. He pushed the pile of first year papers away and picked up her parchment. A bolt of anxiety went through her. _He's going to read it now? _She thought nervously, checking the clock. _While it's just the two of us?_

A flood of relief went through her when Daisy Greene walked through the door. She was followed a moment later by the Ravenclaw boys and then her fellow Slytherins. When all 7 students were seated, Snape set Freddie's essay aside and stood to teach.

"Homework," he said shortly.

There was a scramble as everyone retrieved their homework and turned it in. Snape put the papers on his desk, then turned back to them.

"Today you will be brewing the Wiggenweld Potion-"

"But sir," Perkins interrupted. "That's a _first year _potion."

"Well then it should be an easy day for you, shouldn't it?" he sneered. "Get to work. The recipe is in your textbook, under antidotes, which you should know if you did your homework. _Begin_."

Freddie frowned as her classmates pulled out their copies of _Advanced Potion Making _and started gathering ingredients. She knew if they followed the textbook recipe, without Snape's notes, it wouldn't be perfect. They might get it close but it wouldn't be perfect.

She reached in her bag and pulled out _Magical Drafts and Potions. _She hadn't bothered to put it back in her trunk yesterday and was now glad she hadn't. She opened it to the Wiggenweld Potion page, which she still had ear-marked, then got up to gather supplies.

The potion was easy with her notes from first year, so Freddie was able to watch Snape in her peripheral. She knew he was reading her essay. She watched his eyes as he read and she didn't miss the slight look of surprise that passed over his features. He shut it down quick and Freddie looked down at her potion as he looked up at her.

_Is he looking at me? He's looking at me, _she thought, stirring her potion carefully until it turned turquoise. She stoked the flames beneath the cauldron with her wand, increasing the heat and waiting for the brew to turn indigo.

Snape stood from his desk and made his rounds, checking their work. He didn't linger at any of them but made his way to the store cupboard. Freddie's potion turned indigo and she added more Salamander blood.

When she glanced up Snape was walking through the students again. Freddie glanced at her potion and heard a loud plop and a groan from behind her. She looked up to see Snape drop something into Greene's cauldron. The girl looked terrified but didn't make a sound as her potion began to smoke.

Freddie focused on her own potion, but heard four more plops as Snape added unknown ingredients to her classmates cauldrons.

"What _was _that?" Maggie asked as her potion began to emit a foul-smelling green cloud.

Snape looked at her and made an 'I don't know' gesture.

"Figure it out," he said icily.

Freddie was prepared and she didn't even look up when Snape stopped in front of her. She did watch his hands though, saw the pale root he dropped into her cauldron before heading back to his desk.

Freddie's potion began to darken but she moved quickly. She grabbed her wand and placed a stasis spell on her potion. She scurried to the cupboard and grabbed a handful of Boom Berries. She went back to her potion and crushed several berries into a beaker before removing the stasis spell. She added a few drops to her potion and stirred it once, carefully. She added more juice, bit by bit, monitoring it each time and relying on her instinct, until her potion was indigo once more.

Satisfied and elated, Freddie continued on with the directions in her book.

Towards the end of the class, Snape stood up again. Freddie looked around at her classmates. They were all struggling and none of them had anything remotely resembling Wiggenweld Potion.

"Dreadful," Snape said in a low voice as he swept through the dungeon. "Disappointing. Absurd. Ludicrous."

As he approached her workstation Freddie leaned back and crossed her arms, a smile playing on her lips. She knew that the emerald green potion simmering away in her cauldron was nothing short of flawless.

Snape stopped at her cauldron and gave a small nod. The bell rang and Snape raised his wand. With a wave he vanished the contents of every cauldron but hers.

"Miss Gray, stay after class. The rest of you – figure out what you did wrong, what you can do better, and have your reports on my desk first thing Friday morning. Dismissed."

Freddie's heart was pounding in her chest as her classmates hurried out of the room. Snape walked over and shut the door behind them. He walked back over to where Freddie sat motionless. He didn't speak but his dark eyes moved across her workstation. In a swift movement he closed her textbook.

"_Magical Drafts and Potions _by Arsenius Jigger," he said in his silky smooth voice.

"Y-yes sir. I needed it for my homework last night so I had it on hand. The notes I made in first year – your notes, sir, your corrections. They're better than any textbook."

"Mm hmm," he said, flipping her book open to read her notes.

"Professor Snape?"

"Yes, Miss Gray?"

"The lesson today – it was a test?"

"It was."

"Well, they failed," she snorted. "Epically."

"They did," he said with a faint smirk.

"But I didn't."

"No," he said slowly. "You did not."

There was a moment of silence between them as Snape flipped through the pages of her old textbook, looking at the notes in the margins. Freddie knew she was going to be late for her next class, but she didn't care. She'd never been late for a class in her life but she didn't want this to end – whatever _this _was.

"You are talented," he said finally, looking down at her, his gaze unreadable. "You have good instincts, a quick mind, and you're steady under pressure."

Freddie opened her mouth to say thank you, but nothing came out. He'd just complimented her, _really _complimented her, like four compliments. She pinched herself discreetly, convinced she must be dreaming.

"Close your mouth," he said, sounding very faintly amused. He put his hand under her chin and gently pushed her jaw closed. Freddie had to pinch herself again and she felt her cheeks grow warm.

"There is a potion," he said, dropping his hand and walking back towards her desk. "A new, very complicated potion which relieves the effects of lycanthropy."

"The Wolfsbane Potion!" she said enthusiastically. "Sorry, sir, for interrupting you. I- I read about it in _Apothecary Now _when it came out in June."

"You read _Apothecary Now_?" he asked with a tone of surprise. "Of course you do."

He shook his head slightly, a smile playing at the corner of his lips. He turned to his desk a moment then turned back to her.

"How would you like to help brew it?" he asked.

"Wh- seriously? You're kidding, right?"

"I do not 'kid', Miss Gray. I understand if you don't wish to assist me. It is very complex and time consuming and you have NEWT-level work to keep up with-"

"Shut up!" she said, then flushed. "I mean, sorry, but _yes!_ I'd love to brew it, whatever it takes, even if I have to drop a class to keep up!"

"You will _not _drop a class," he said sternly. "If you can't keep up-"

"I can! I can keep up, I will, I promise," she vowed, excitement coursing through her.

"Very well. Meet me in my office before dinner. You're dismissed."

"Thank you, sir," she said, hastily packing her things away. "I, uh, I may need a pass for Professor Merritt's class."

"Art," he said disdainfully, grabbing a blank piece of parchment to write her an excuse. "Ridiculous subject."

Freddie didn't argue, she was too excited. She slung her bag over her shoulder and got the pass from Snape.

"Thank you, sir," she said as she took the parchment from his hand. She rushed to the door but paused before opening it. "Seriously. Thank you."

"Go, Miss Gray. Before I change my mind."

Freddie hurried from the room and bumped into a small Gryffindor student, knocking him into the ground.

"Watch it," she growled at him.

"S-sorry ma'am," he squeaked.

Freddie snorted in amusement and continued past the group of young students waiting outside of Snape's classroom. She left the dungeons and traipsed up the stairs to the fifth floor, feeling elated.

_Snape wants me to help him! _She thought ecstatically, clutching the pass in her hand as she hurried down the corridor. _I'm going to be working with him! Alone! _

Freddie opened the door to the Art classroom and hurried in. Students were scattered throughout the room, working with various mediums. Some were working on sculptures, others molded clay. Daniel was at the back of the room, standing at an easel, and gave her a 'what the hell' look when she entered.

Professor Merritt was in her office which had a window looking out into the classroom. She was an older woman, but was the most laid-back instructors at Hogwarts. She had short red hair and large glasses. The front of her robes were always splattered with paint.

"Freddie," Professor Merritt said cheerfully. "What can I do for you?"

"Sorry I'm late, Professor. Professor Snape asked to speak with me after class. I have a pass," she said, handing it to her.

"No worries," Merritt said. "Just dive right in. Use whatever medium you feel like using and express yourself! Have fun."

"Yes ma'am."

Freddie grabbed an easel and canvas from the closed and carried them over beside Daniel.

"You're late," Daniel said, paint flowing through his wand onto the canvas. "You're never late!"

"I know!" she gushed. "But I've got the best reason ever!"

She set up her canvas and opened several jars of paint.

"You gonna make me ask?" Daniel asked, bemused.

"I was with Snape," she said with a mischievous grin.

"Ew," he said. "Guess your perfume worked."

"Shut up," she laughed. "He invited me to help him with a complicated potion. He said I was talented! Skilled!"

"What kinda potion?"

"The Wolfsbane Potion!"

"Never heard of it."

"That's cuz it's new – only a handful of people in the _world _have brewed it! _In the whole world, _Daniel, and I'm going to be one of them!"

"And you'll get to spend some one-on-one time with Snape," he said slyly.

"I know, right? And the potion, it takes at least a month to complete."

"Cool," he said, focusing back on his painting.

"I've got to find the recipe and study it – I can't disappoint him, Daniel, I've _got _to be good at this. I've got to impress him."

"You will," he assured her. "You're a rock star."

_ "Damn right," she said, picking up her wand to focus on her painting. _


	5. Chapter 5

An hour later when the bell rang, Freddie looked at her finished work. A gold and green dragon with glittering scales that shone as if sunlight were hitting them as the dragon flew across the canvas.

"Impressive," Daniel said as he packed up their supplies.

"Thanks," she said. "Yours too."

Daniel had painted a lighthouse, overlooking a dark, stormy sea. The waves rolled and the beacon on the lighthouse moved, shining out over the sea.

"I'm gonna swing by my dorm before lunch and find the copy of _Apothecary Now_ that came over the summer, it's got the article about the Wolfsbane in it," Freddie said as they headed downstairs.

"When are you supposed to start on it?" he asked.

"Tonight, before dinner," she said enthusiastically.

"Guess we won't get our rematch on the Quidditch pitch then."

"Yeah. Sorry."

"Don't be! Like you said, you have the best reason. Besides, I didn't really fancy getting rained on anyway."

"Another day. Maybe this weekend, the rain should clear up by then."

"Definitely. Go get your potion thing, I'll see you in a bit."

#

Throughout lunch Freddie studied the article while she ate. The entire recipe wasn't listed, much to her disappointment. The author and creator of the potion, Damocles Belby, claimed it was for safety reasons. The potion was so delicate and dastardly to get wrong that Belby claimed only the most skilled Potions Masters should attempt it.

She assumed Snape had contacted Belby and gotten the recipe. Some of the ingredients were listed in the article and Freddie studied them carefully. They were rare and expensive. Powdered silver. Runescore scales. Graphorn horn.

Freddie wished she had the recipe or at least the full list of ingredients.

_How am I supposed to study for this? _She thought, closing the magazine so she could finish wolfing down her lunch.

"Ready for Care of Magical Creatures?" Daniel asked, approaching the Slytherin table.

Some of the Slytherin students hissed at him.

"Get outta here, half-blood!" said a 7th year student.

"You're not welcome here," Maxwell said threateningly.

"We're going," Freddie said, glaring at the older boys. "Come on, Daniel. Sorry about them."

"I'm used to it," he said as they left the hall. "Been six years of it. Screw them. You find your Potions thing?"

"Eh, it was useless. They didn't print the full recipe."

"Why not?"

"Safety reasons," she said, making air quote marks with her fingers. "Cuz it can blow up and kill you."

"Fun," Daniel said sarcastically.

Freddie grinned at him.

As they walked across the grounds towards Care of Magical Creatures class, Freddie filled him in on the events of Snape's class and the test he'd given the other students.

"Wow! Now I'm even more glad I'm not taking NEWT Potions classes. How did you know what to do?" Daniel asked.

"It all depends on what he adds, what ingredients. Then I know what to add to cancel them out. If he just adds more of one of the ingredients in the recipe, like yesterday, I just do a few quick calculations in my head to compensate with the rest of the ingredients. There's a little bit of instinct involved – which direction to stir, when to raise or lower the heat, inert substances to add. I've been lucky so far."

"Not lucky – brilliant. Intuitive," he said, grinning. "There's no such thing as luck."

"Tell that to Felix Felicis."

"Who?"

"Never mind. Look, there's Professor Kettleburn," she said, nodding to where the one-legged man stood near the Forbidden Forest. About 15 students stood around him. Kettleburn waved with his artificial claw hand as they approached.

"Good afternoon everyone. Now that we're all here – we'll be heading into the forest today. Follow me closely and keep your eyes open. Oh and if anyone spots a chimera roaming around the forest or on the grounds let me know. One sort of got away from us this morning."

"He _lost _a chimera?" Freddie muttered to Daniel as they followed Kettleburn into the forest. "Aren't they really dangerous?"

"Yeah they're class XXXXX," Daniel said enthusiastically. "I'd _love _to see one. Wouldn't it we be cool if we were the ones to find it?"

"Yeah, especially if she had eggs," Freddie said thoughtfully. "They'd be an invaluable potions ingredient. They're deemed Non-Tradeable by the Ministry but if we _found _some..."

"Here we are," Kettleburn said, stopping at a large willow tree beside a river. "Anyone want to take a crack at what we're looking for?"

"Chimeras?" asked a Gryffindor girl, Alice Cahill.

"No – but if you spot one do give a shout, won't you?"

"Bowtruckles," Daniel sad, approaching one of the curved branches. Freddie looked closer and spotted the small twig-like creatures clutching the branch.

"Good eye, Mr Byrd!" Kettleburn said, motioning the rest of the class closer. "Don't try to touch them, at least, not yet. Gather round everyone and get a handful from this bag."

"What is it?" Freddie asked as she got in line behind Daniel, trying to crane her neck and see what was in Kettleburn's bag.

"Either woodlice or fairy eggs. Probably woodlice," he said, watching as the Gryffindor girl took a handful and squealed.

"They're wriggling!" she said, making a face.

Daniel rolled his eyes as he stepped up to take a handful. He motioned for Freddie to follow him. She grabbed a quick handful of lice and followed him.

"Look," he said. "hold your palm out flat, like this."

He held his hand out and immediately four Bowtruckles climbed onto his hand to eat the lice.

Freddie mimicked his action. A small Bowtruckle, about 3 inches long, crawled cautiously onto her outstretched hand. It watched her with sparkling black eyes that reminded her of Snape.

"Hey there," Freddie said softly. "You want some lice? They're yummy. Your friends like them."

She glanced up at Daniel who now had at least a dozen Bowtruckles crawling all over him. He laughed as they climbed up his arms and his head, explored the pockets of his robes and pants.

"That's the ticket, Mr Byrd!" Kettleburn said. "They're very perceptive creatures. They don't trust everyone, but they seem to have taken quite a shine to Mr Byrd here. Bowtruckles only live in trees whose wood is of wand-making quality. They may look cute but if threatened they can become quite violent..."

#

After Care of Magical Creatures, Daniel and Freddie headed back up to the castle together.

"That was so cool," Daniel said enthusiastically. "The Bowtruckles _loved _me – I probably could've carried one home in my pocket!"

"Yeah then you could finally have a girlfriend," she teased.

"Shut up!" he said, his ears turning red. He shoved her playfully. "_Speaking _of girlfriends – when are you supposed to meet _Severus_?"

"I don't know, he said come before dinner."

"Uh-huh," he said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Perv," she said, shoving him. "I'm gonna go get cleaned up and head down to Snape's office."

"Have fun," he said, winking at her as she broke off to head down into the dungeons.

Freddie took a quick shower, finally washing off the Herbology smell properly. She dried her hair with her wand, leaving it naturally curly around her shoulders. She decided not to don her school robes, since she was officially done with classes for the day. She put on a pair of black slacks and a short-sleeve button-up top that was green in color. It wasn't inappropriate or particularly revealing but it was functional – it would allow her to move more freely while she worked on the potion. She sat on the edge of her bed and laced up her favorite pair of black leather boots.

She checked her reflection once in the mirror and nodded to herself before picking up her bag and leaving the dormitory. She walked through the Common Room and was about to leave when someone called her name.

"Hey Freddie, you got a sec?"

She turned to see Maggie, Christine Gibbs, and Alexander Foxx sitting at a table together near the fireplace. Maggie was waving her over.

"What's up? I'm kind of busy," she said, checking her watch.

"Can you help us with this Potions homework? We're kind of dying over here," Maggie said.

"Yeah you're the only one who really understands this stuff," Alexander said.

"I dunno," Freddie said dubiously. "Alot of it is just instinct, I'm not sure I can really explain it."

"_Please _Freddie? Just point us in the right direction. We'll fail without you and get kicked out of class, then it would just be you and Snape."

"Alright," Freddie agreed, while privately thinking that wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. "Use your Herbology textbooks, figure out what ingredients counteract the ones he adds to your potions."

She gave them a quick rundown of how to do the calculations and told them a spell that would reveal the ingredients of a potion.

"That's the best I can do," she said, shrugging.

"That helps, Freddie, thank you," Maggie said, hastily scribbling stuff down.

"Yeah, thanks Gray," Christine said, pulling out her Herbology textbook.

"Yep. Good luck," she said, waving to them as she left the Common Room.

Freddie headed down the stone staircase that led to Snape's office. She knocked but there was no answer.

_He must still be teaching a class, _she realized.

Disappointed, she headed back up the staircase. She had really wanted to get started on the Wolfsbane. She walked down to the Potions classroom and peeked in through the window.

The classroom was full of fifth-year Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. Snape sat at his desk, grading papers, but he looked up suddenly. As if he sensed her presence, her looked directly at her.

For a moment, Freddie felt cowed but she gave him a little finger wave through the window. Snape stood up and strode over to the door to open it. The students turned to look at them.

"Continue working. _Silently_," he said to his class before stepping outside and shutting the door. "You are early."

"Sorry," she said sheepishly. "I had a free period and I thought – well, I didn't know you had a class, it's okay I can come back later."

She turned to go.

"Wait," he said and she turned back to him. He held up his finger and opened the door to his classroom.

"I will be back in less than 10 minutes. I expect you all to continue your work without any talking or nonsense. If you disobey, I _will _find out and the results will be...particularly unpleasant."

He shut the door loudly and motioned for Freddie to follow him.

"I tried to study, to prepare for what we're about to do, but the full recipe wasn't published and I-"

"I have it," he said as they went down the stairs to his office. "I did not expect you to study for it."

"Is it really so dangerous that they couldn't print the full recipe?" she asked. "What about people who _are _werewolves who want to brew it for themselves?"

He looked back at her, eyebrow raised, and shook his head. Outside his office, Snape raised his wand. He moved his wand in an intricate pattern until the door glowed white and opened.

Freddie followed Snape into his dimly-lit office. She'd been there a few dozen times in the last 6 years, during mandatory meetings with her Head of House, and she always looked forward to it. There were shelves lined with jars of things, like brains and skulls and unknown potions. Some of the shelves contained books, including the shelf above the fireplace.

With a flick of his wand, Snape lit a fire in the hearth, which brightened the room significantly. He tapped the bookcase to the right of the fireplace and it swung open, revealing a secret room.

"Come," he said and a thrill went through Freddie as she followed him into his private room.

It was a small room with stone walls. In the middle of the room was an empty cauldron. Along one wall was a long wooden table, clearly a workstation, laden with tools and vials. Snape walked over to the table as Freddie looked around. She looked up, noticing for the first time that the room was lit by a skylight in the ceiling.

"Pay attention," Snape said sharply.

Freddie looked back down and quickly walked over to him.

"This is my private brewing room – don't make me regret bringing you here."

"No sir," she said obediently, hands clasped behind her back.

"This is the recipe for the Wolfsbane Potion. I got it directly from Belby. This is highly classified material, do you understand? It does not leave this room."

"Yes sir."

He looked at her intensely, as if he were x-raying her.

"Do you see the scorch marks on the floor, the broken stone on the walls? That is from my first attempt at brewing the Wolfsbane Potion. This potion can be disastrous. Deadly. You understand?"

"Yes sir," she said. "How can I help?"

"Read the recipe carefully and gather the ingredients we will need to get started tonight. I'll meet you back here after I finish teaching the idiots upstairs. And do not attempt to start without me."

"Yes sir. Thank you."

He grunted and left the room, leaving Freddie alone to work.


	6. Chapter 6

Freddie poured over the recipe enthusiastically. She read the extensive list of ingredients. They were rare, complicated, expensive, and some of them were downright appalling. _Sheep brains...human blood. _Freddie was shocked but not daunted.

She gathered the ingredients from Snape's private storage closet. She was getting the fluxweed when it dawned on her that she was alone in Snape's office.

_Alone. In Snape's office_, she thought, a thrill going through her. _No one's here, no one's watching me. _

Her mind raced with things she could do. She wanted to snoop but was terrified of getting caught. She put the fluxweed down and walked along the rows of shelves, hands clasped behind her back, examining the contents of the jars.

She walked over to his desk slowly. She looked around quickly and sneakily tried the top drawer of his desk. It opened and she peaked inside. She was disappointed to find nothing but parchment, quills, and extra ink. She wasn't sure what she expected but quills and ink were boring. She tried the bottom drawer but it was locked.

_What could be in here? _She wondered.

She knew better than to try and unlock it with a spell. Magic would leave traces. She decided not to press her luck and went back to gathering ingredients for the potion.

#

Freddie checked her watch. She'd prepared everything she could and she still had 15 minutes until Snape would be out of class. She pulled the recipe back to her and studied it again, trying to commit as much of it to memory as she could.

When she heard the door to the office open, Freddie didn't look up from the recipe until she felt Snape's presence behind her. He looked annoyed.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

"I have two fifth-year Hufflepuffs coming to serve detention after dinner," he said irritably. "They attempted to help one another while I was out of the room."

"How do you know?"

"I know everything. Have you gathered all the ingredients for tonight?" he asked, looking at the pile of ingredients.

"Yes, sir, except..."

"Except what, Miss Gray?"

"Well the recipe, it – it calls for human blood, sir, and I wasn't quite sure-"

"I did not expect you to provide that particular ingredient," he said.

He took an empty beaker from the desk. With a simple slicing motion of his wand, he cut his left wrist. Freddie gasped softly and watched as his blood trickled into the vial. Her eyes followed the stream of blood back to his cut wrist, then along his pale forearm. That's where she saw it. She had been young when her parents worked for the Dark Lord, but not so young that she didn't recognize the Dark Mark. The horrible tattoo that caused her mother to yelp in pain whenever it burned. She saw it now on Snape's forearm, partially hidden by the sleeve of his black robe. The head and neck of the snake disappeared beneath his sleeve. She couldn't see the skull but she knew it was there.

Snape saw her looking and she quickly looked away. He finished filling the vial and grabbed some of the Dittany from the table.

"Oh let me-" Freddie began but Snape ignored her. He chewed the Dittany a moment then stuck the salve to his forearm. He held it there a moment and when he removed it the wound was gone, leaving only a faint pink scar. He threw the Dittany into the wastebasket and shook his sleeve down over his arm.

"We're going to need more Dittany," he said.

"Got it," she said, hopping up from her stool to go retrieve it.

When she returned, Snape was measuring purified water and adding it to the cauldron. Wanting to help, Freddie measured the next ingredient and handed it to him when he was ready.

"Do you know why the recipe calls for human blood, Miss Gray?" Snape asked as he added fluxweed to the cauldron.

"No, sir," she said as she carefully poured three measures of powdered silver from a small bag. He stepped beside her to measure the same amount of moonstone.

"It satiates the beast's need to hunt and kill. It quenches their blood lust," he said, motioning for her to follow him to the cauldron. "We must pour the moonstone and the silver into the cauldron simultaneously."

"Yes sir, I studied the recipe," she said with a nod. "I'm ready."

"Good. 3...2...1."

Freddie watched as the two ingredients met and dissolved into the brew. Snape began to stir the potion carefully.

"Sir?" Freddie said cautiously. "When we learned about werewolves in third year, Professor Higgins said that werewolves were not so different from us. He claimed they were 'misunderstood' and forced to live in poverty."

"The sort of rubbish I'd expect from someone who's never come face to face with one during a full moon," he sneered, still stirring.

"You've seen one?"

"Yes, Miss Gray. When I was younger than you are now. And I was nearly killed by it," he said. He stopped stirring as the potion had become silver.

"How did you escape? Were you injured?" she asked, unable to help but feel impressed by the fact he'd survived a werewolf attack.

"The sheep brains, Miss Gray," he said impatiently.

"Huh? Oh."

Freddie quickly grabbed the three sheep brains she'd diced earlier and handed them to him. He inspected her work then nodded before adding them to the cauldron. She watched as he stirred clockwise three times, then stoked the flames beneath the cauldron with his wand.

"How long will it take for the smoke to become purple?" Freddie asked as Snape stepped away from the cauldron.

"It took 15 minutes last time," he answered, leaning against the desk. Freddie sat back on her stood to wait, facing the cauldron.

"What happened last time?" she asked, nodding to the scorch marks on the floor.

"For the first week that the potion stews, wolfsbane must be added every four hours. I made the mistake of thinking I could step away from my class for ten minutes, every four hours," he said disdainfully. "I was only on Day 3 when classes started and I was unable to leave my first years unattended. I came back to this." He gestured at the floor and walls. "The glass on the ceiling had broken and everything was ruined, all the ingredients gone to waste..."

"Is that why you need me, sir?"

"I do not _need _your help, Miss Gray," he sneered. "With time I'm sure I could find a more suitable method. However...you are available. And you are, perhaps, the most...capable student I have ever taught."

Freddie flushed with pride.

"Last year, when we met to discuss your career path you indicated you wished to join the brewers at St. Mungos?" he asked.

"Yes, sir. My uncle wants me to get a job at the Ministry but I can't imagine life chained behind a desk. My aunt thinks-"

"Spare me your life story," he drawled, then gave her a small smirk. "Do you intend to carry your old Potions textbooks with my notes in them to work everyday?"

"At least until I memorize them," she chuckled. "...Your notes are more valuable than any textbook."

He looked surprised, just for a moment, then he inclined his head.

"You are not wrong," he said.

"I think what you mean is 'thank you, Miss Gray'," she said playfully.

"Don't push your luck," he warned with a small smirk.

They were interrupted by a knock at the office door. Snape checked his watch.

"Hufflepuffs," he scoffed.

"I've got this," Freddie said, nodding to the potion. "If you want to deal with them."

He inclined his head and walked out into his office. Freddie kept her eyes on the potion but listened as Snape berated the Hufflepuff boys and told them their punishment – dissecting rats by hand for use as potion ingredients.

The Wolfsbane Potion began to smoke purple and Freddie got up. She counted 15 kava leaves carefully as she added them to the potion one by one. She stirred the potion 3 times clockwise, then reduced the flames beneath the cauldron. She checked the recipe again to make sure.

Let simmer for 30 minutes beneath the moonlight.

Freddie looked up, finally understanding the purpose of the skylight. Sure enough the sky had grown dark and a sliver of moon could be seen, along with several twinkling stars. She checked her watch so she could time the 30 minutes precisely.

She studied the recipe further while she waited, checking her watch every few minutes. It was quiet other than the crackling of the flames beneath the cauldron. So quiet she could hear Snape's quill scratching on parchment as he sat at his desk. Could hear the squelching sounds of the boys cutting into rats with knives.

She was re-reading the instructions for Day 7 for the second time when she heard Snape's chair move. She checked her watch. 8 more minutes on the potion.

"What is this, Hadden?" she heard Snape's drawling tone inquire.

"A spleen, sir?"

"That's a _liver _you ignorant boy! Tell me what sort of potion calls for _rat liver_?"

There was no response and even though she couldn't see them from where she sat, Freddie could imagine the terrified look on the boys' faces. She chuckled to herself.

"20 points from Hufflepuff – get out of my sigh, both of you, _now_!" Snape snarled.

Freddie heard a scramble then the sound of the door slamming shut. Snape strode into the potion-brewing room, looking irritated.

"What's so funny?" he snapped.

"Nothing," Freddie said, quickly wiping the smirk from her face.

"Go- deal with that _mess _in there," he said.

"Yes sir," he said, hopping up from her stool. She glanced at her watch. "Five minutes, 13 seconds on the potion."  
He nodded shortly and Freddie went out to his office. There was a small table that hadn't been there before. On top of the workstation were 10 poorly-disemboweled rats. Freddie shook her head in disgust. With a wave of her wand, Freddie removed the useful organs – the spleen and the brain. With a quick slicing motion she removed the tails, also a useful ingredient in potions.

"_Evanesco_," she said, vanishing the mutilated bodies. "_Scourgify."_

The blood vanished from the desktop. She summoned three pots and separated the organs for storage, not at all squeamish about the task. She took the pots to the storage closet then returned to the lab.

Snape was stirring the potion when she entered. She quickly brought him the next ingredient he would need – the beaker of his blood.

She watched, fascinated, as he poured it in.

"Talk about pouring yourself into your work," she joked, unable to stop herself from chuckling. Snape looked at her with one raised eyebrow, clearly unamused.

The potion began to smoke and Freddie quickly handed him the small vial of Bloodroot Essence. He carefully added 5 drops and the smoke began to clear.

"That's it for tonight," he said, putting the stopper back in the vial. "I will add the wolfsbane at midnight and 4 a.m. Be here at 8 in the morning for the next infusion and every 4 hours after during the day. I will write you a pass to leave class as needed and speak with your teachers ahead of time. Clean up."

He left the room and Freddie made quick work of cleaning the instruments they'd used. When she stepped out into his office, Snape was at his desk.

"Here is your pass," he said, handing it to her. She accepted it and scanned it quickly.

_Winifred Gray is permitted to leave class briefly to attend to her duties as apprentice. _

_ -Severus Snape, Potions Master_

The brief annoyance Freddie felt at being addressed as 'Winifred' disappeared at the last word.

"Am I your apprentice?" she asked with a grin.

"Don't get a big head," he scoffed, then paused a moment. "You missed dinner."

"Eh, it's okay," she said, but her stomach chose that moment to growl loudly. Snape smirked.

"Sit," he said, indicating a chair in front of his desk. With a wave of his wand, he summoned a plate of ham sandwiches, presumably from the kitchens. Freddie hesitated a moment, then sat. Snape sat across from her at his desk. Freddie didn't pick up a sandwich until he did. She took a bite and suddenly realized she was starving. She took several big bites and swallowed.

"Slow down, Winifred, it's not going anywhere," he said, sounding faintly amused.

Freddie choked on her sandwich. She coughed, trying to clear her airway, but couldn't. Snape waved his wand and a goblet of water appeared. Freddie grabbed it and drank quickly. She swallowed heavily.

"Don't call me that," she said harshly, eyes watering.

"What?"

"Winifred," she spat, clearing her throat.

"It's your name, is it not?" he asked, the faintest tone of amusement still in his voice.

"_Not_," she said. "It's Freddie or Fred."

"Hmph," he said, sitting back in his chair. "I believe I shall stick with 'Miss Gray'."

"Fine by me," she said, grabbing another sandwich.

They ate in silence a moment.

"I have a question," Freddie said through a mouthful of sandwich.

"Chew with your mouth _closed, _Miss Gray, and I may have an answer," he said. "One would think you were raised by Muggleborns."

Freddie snorted and swallowed quickly.

"If you hate werewolves so much, why are you brewing the Wolfsbane Potion?"

"Ah. I like a challenge," he answered slowly. "I have no intention of testing it."

Freddie nodded thoughtfully, chewing her sandwich.

"I like a challenge, too," she agreed.

They finished eating and Freddie stood to go.

"Oh – how am I supposed to get into your office tomorrow? Your door is usually locked, isn't it?"

"It is. ...I am going to teach you the enchantment to unlock my office. You will _not _tell anyone, you will not snoop, you will not _bring _anyone here, especially boys-"

"Wh-"

"I know girls your age only have one thing on their mind," he finished.

"The only thing on my mind, _sir_, is this potion," she said coolly.

"You will do what you're here to do then return to your class. No detours or lollygagging. Understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. Now step outside so I can show you the enchantment."


	7. Chapter 7

Freddie woke the next morning to an empty dormitory. She checked her watch and swore loudly. It was almost 7:30 already. Freddie got dressed in record time, shoved her books into her bag, and headed up to the Great Hall for breakfast.

She bypassed the Slytherin table and headed straight for Daniel.

"Hey, you missed dinner last night," he said, scooting over to make room for her.

"I know, I ate with Snape after we worked on the potion it was _awesome_!" she said, pulling a plate of pancakes towards her.

Freddie filled him in on the events of the evening, all the while shoving bties of food into her mouth, and checking her watch every few minutes.

"I've gotta go work on the potion at 8," she said through a mouthful of sausage. "And every 4 hours after."

"What about class?"

"He gave me a permanent pass."

"Seriously? Lucky!"

"I know right? And get this," she said, looking around quickly then whispered. "I saw it."

"What? His-?" he gaped at her.

"No! _The Dark Mark_," she whispered.

"Oo. Well that's better than what I thought."

"Uh-huh."

"But still. That means he really was a Death Eater," he said quietly.

"So? So were a lot of people."

"Yeah but the ones who aren't in Azkaban either bought their way out or snitched."

"So?"

"So? What if he's one of the ones who ratted out your folks?" he whispered.

Freddie was speechless. She hadn't considered that. Her watch beeped and she jumped up.

"Gotta go," she said, grabbing a sausage to go. "Catch you later."

Freddie headed back down to the dungeons, down the stone staircase to Snape's office. She waved her wand in the intricate pattern Snape had shown her last night. The door glowed white then swung open.

It was dark inside, no fire in the hearth.

"Lumos," she said, lighting her wand tip as she entered the room. The door to the potion brewing room was open and Freddie could see the cauldron, lit by the skylight. She stepped into the room and headed for the table where the wolfsbane plant waited for her.

"Good morning," said a voice.

Freddie jumped straight up then whirled around, wand drawn. Snape stepped out of the shadows, mouth twitching in amusement.

"Are you _trying _to kill me?" Freddie demanded, lowering her wand.

"If I were going to kill you, Miss Gray, I would be much more efficient at it."

"No doubt," she snorted. "Why are you here?"

"It _is _my office."

"I meant, don't you have a class?"

"I wanted to make sure you didn't screw anything up," he said haughtily. "Trusting a _student _with my potion is still a difficult concept for me to wrap my mind around."

"You have nothing to worry about," she said confidently. She approached the table and quickly chopped up the wolfsbane plant. She measured one cup carefully. Snape scrutinized her every move but didn't say a word. Freddie couldn't help but think of what Daniel said. What if Snape _was _the reason her parents were in jail.

"Something on your mind, Gray?" Snape asked as she finished stirring the potion. She looked up at him hesitantly, then the bell rang.

"Can I stay here to work on my homework?" she asked quickly. "I have a free period, and if I work anywhere else people ask me to help them with their homework. Like I don't have enough to do."

"...I suppose that is fine," Snape said finally. "Lock up when you leave and don't forget – 12 o'clock."

"Yes sir. Thank you."

#

Freddie stayed in the potion brewing room, doing homework and studying, until it was time for her to go to Transfiguration. She found the soft bubbling of the potion and the crackling of the flames to be soothing. It was easier to focus there than it was anywhere else and she got a lot done.

She left Snape's office feeling very satisfied with her work. She sealed the door before heading up for Double Transfiguration.

She met Daniel on the stairs leading to McGonagall's classroom.

"How was Divination?" she asked.

"Oh same old, same old. We were supposed to p[redict the future using dragon bones. Trelawney said mine predicted 'a great tragedy within the next year'," he said, rolling his eyes.

"I'll start working on your eulogy," she joked.

"How's your fancypants potion?"

"Simmering along nicely. Snape let me stay in there and do homework and study. It was so peaceful! I'm all caught up on homework now."

"Hey, me too! I finished last night – well now I have this dream diary thing to do for Trelawney."

"Didn't we do that last year?"

"Yeah we have to do another one. Time for her to tell me how my Quidditch dreams mean I'm gonna fall to my death or something."

Freddie let out a snort of laughter as they entered the classroom. She set her bag down then approached McGonagall at her desk.

"Professor McGonagall?"

"Yes, Miss Gray?"

"I have a potion to tend to for Professor Snape at noon," Freddie said, pulling the pass from the pocket of her robes. "There's an ingredient that has to be added at exactly 12 so if it's alright with you I need to leave class about 10 minutes early."

"That's fine Miss Gray, I spoke with Professor Snape this morning... You must have impressed him."

"Professor?"

"Severus has worked here for nearly a decade and he's never taken an apprentice. You must be extremely talented."

"I try to be," she said with a smile.

She sat down next to Daniel and got her books out as the rest of the students filed into the classroom.

#

Freddie tended to the Wolfsbane at 12 and then again at 4 after her Arithmancy class. She'd agreed to meet Daniel at the Quidditch pitch afterwards. As she walked down to the field she could hear music playing. As she got closer she recognized it as Motley Crue.

"Rattlesnake shake, shake shake shake, rattlesnake shake," Daniel sang as he zipped around on his broom. He spotted Freddie walking towards the broomshed and zoomed to her, still singing.

"She's got sassy class, bring you to your knees, when she shakes her ass. She's a voodoo, voodoo child. Just one look will drive you wild. Slides through the night with a viper's smile. Come on there girl won't ya shake that thing."

"I'm not shaking my ass for you, Daniel," she said with a grin as she mounted her broom. She ascended into the air as his flace flushed red.

"It's just a dance," he said. "The Rattlesnake Shake."

"I don't dance," she said, shaking her head. Daniel pulled out his wand and summoned the Quaffle from beside his record player on the bleachers.

"How about this – I score more goals than you and _you _have to do the Rattlesnake Shake?" he said, wiggling on his broom. She let out a snort of laughter as he nearly fell and had to straighten out.

"And what do I get when I win?"

"Oh _when _you win? Cocky aren't you, Miss Gray?" he taunted.

"I don't need dragon bones or dream diaries to predict the outcome."

"Uh-huh. Well _if _you win...then _I'll _do the Rattlesnake Shake."

"Fine – game on!"

They spent the next two and a half hours on the field, scoring goal after goal, nearly knocking each other off their brooms. Daniel called time out once when the record finished and he swapped it out for a different one. Freddie listened as the music began and they resumed their game. The music was catch and Freddie found it improved her focus on the game.

"Hey!" she called, Quaffle in one hand as Daniel tried to block her from the goal. "What band is this?"

"The Doors – they're a rock band from the 60s," he answered. "Why?"

"I like it!" she responded before tossing the Quaffle past his head into the goal.

At 7 o'clock Daniel's watch beeped, distracting him enough that Freddie scored the last goal.

"Time for dinner?" she asked.

"It's 7 o'clock – we could go 15 more minutes?" he suggested hopefully.

"Nope, I need to eat so I can get back to my potion. Besides, it's 22 to 15 – you don't stand a chance. You never did."

"Fine," Daniel said dramatically, drifting down to the ground. "I guess I'll put Motley Crue back on so you can watch my _Rattlesnake Shake_."

He shook his butt as he got off his broom, grinning like a fool.

"No one wants to see all that," Freddie laughed, shaking her head. "But what you _can _do is restart this record. That first song was a good one."

"You got it," he said with a wave of his wand. The record scratched then started over. This time Freddie sang along.

"_You know the day destroys the night. Night divides the day. Tried to run, tried to hide-"_

"Break on through to the other side," Daniel joined in.

They both sang and Daniel started dancing, moving his body and prancing around the field until Freddie was laughing so hard she couldn't breathe, let along sing. Daniel finished the song with a string of cartwheels around the field. He stopped in front of her, grinning broadly, breathing hard.

"You're such a goofball!" Freddie declared, shoving him lightly. "And sweaty! Gross!"

"What, you don't like my man-stink?" he asked, grabbing her in a bear hug.

"Ew, gross! Get off me before I hex you," she said, wiggling out of his grasp. "Sick!"

Daniel laughed loudly and summoned his bag and his record player from the stands.

"Let's go eat so you can get back to your potion – and _dear Severus_," he teased.

"Shut _up_!" she said, whacking him with her broomstick.

"Ow! Okay, okay. _Touchy_," he said, shaking his head. "Dear Snape?"

He dodged her next blow and ran away laughing, levitating his things behind him. Freddie put their brooms away, grabbed her bag, and ran after him.

She ate dinner at the Ravenclaw table so they could work on their Transfiguration homework together. She had a piece of chicken in her mouth when Daniel nudged her.

"Heads up," he hissed.

"Huh?"

"Have you renounced Slytherin House, Miss Gray?" said Snape's silky voice. She swallowed quickly and turned to face him.

"You seem to dine with Ravenclaw more than your own housemates."

"Daniel's my friend and if he sits with us the other Slytherins give him a hard time. It's not against the rules," she said with some hostility.

Beneath the table Daniel stepped on her foot and glared at her pointedly.

"No," Snape said slowly. "It is not. Are you ready to return to work?"

"Yes sir," she said, immediately becoming docile.

"Come," he said, walking away.

Freddie shoved her books and homework haphazardly in her bag, said bye to Daniel, and raced after Snape.

She caught up with Snape in the Entrance Hall and followed him down into the dungeons.

"Did you tend to the potion every four hours?" he asked.

"Of course!" she said, affronted. "_Sir_."

"You added one cup of chopped wolfsbane and stirred it three times?"

"_Yes_."

"Good girl," he said and she stumbled on the steps. The words sent an unexpected rush of arousal through her. She had to shake it off before she continued, a few steps behind him, hoping he hadn't noticed.

"Gather the ingredients and prepare them," Snape said as he unlcoked the door.

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

She dumped her bag into the chair in front of his desk and started gathering ingredients from the store closed.

"Did you memorize the recipe?" he asked, faintly amused.

"Well not the whole thing but Day 2 at least. We start with 2 bundles of scurvy grass, then add 3 measures of fluxweed. Stir 5 times, then-"

"Clockwise or counter clockwise?"

"Counter clockwise," she answered confidently. "Then four mugwort leaves and two cups of sliced valerian root-"

"What does the valerian root do?"

"Induces sleep," she responded. "Many of the ingredients on the lsit are for sleep. After the valerian root is added-"

"That's enough, Miss Gray," he said with a nod. "Get to work. Let me know when you're ready."

"Yes sir."

Snape sat at his desk, a stack of papers in front of him. Freddie got to work, humming happily as she began preparing the ingredients. She was slicing the valerian roots, still humming, when Snape stepped in.

"What is that?" he asked.

"Valerian root, sir?" she said, confused.

"No, that sound."

"Oh, sorry. I was humming, I won't-"

"What was it? The song name?" he mumured, as if he were asking himself and not her. " 'Light My Fire'?"

"Uh, 'Break on Through', I think. The Doors."

"The Doors," he said with a nod and a soft chuckle. It was the first time Freddie had seen him let his guard down for more than a fraction of a second. He was looking down at the floor but she could tell his mind was far away.

"You know The Doors?" she prodded gently.

"Mm. They were popular when I was a boy. My mother-" he broke off suddenly, seeming to realize where he was. His voice hardened. "Let's get to work."

"Yes sir."


	8. Chapter 8

Freddie finished slicing the valerian roots just in time for Snape to add them to the cauldron. He began to stir the cauldron and within a minute it had turned green. He waved his wand and the flames beneath the cauldron grew. Freddie shed her outer robe as the room instantly grew warmer.

She put her robe over her stool and sat down to slice the asphodel roots. Snape got the beaker they'd used yesterday and Freddie watched from the corner of her eye as he slit his wrist to fill the beaker with blood.

She had to focus on her own work as she found the roots particularly tough.

"I've only ever used powdered asphodel before," she said, frowning as she tried to slice through the root. "I never realized how tough they are."

"Slice them the other way," he said, holding the Dittany to his wrist to heal it.

"Huh?"

"Like this," he said, coming up behind her and taking her hands in his. Freddie's heart stopped at the feeling of his soft hands on hers. "Hold your hands like this – and slice lengthwise, _with _the grain of the root."

"Oh," Freddie gasped softly as the knife slid through the root like butter.

"Watch your fingers," he cautioned as he stepped back.

"Thank you," she murmured.

Snape stepped back to look at the potion, which still had 15 minutes to boil before they could continue. Freddie cut the roots in thin, long slices. She was slow and careful.

From the corner of her eye she saw Snape shed his outer robe and lay it across the desk. He grabbed the next root and began to slice it himself. He paused to roll up his sleeves and Freddie saw it. The Dark Mark. It wasn't as clear as she remembered her mother's being. It was faded, like an old tattoo.

"Just ask, Miss Gray,," he said quietly, startling her. She hesitated a moment.

"...Did you know my parents?" she asked.

He paused a moment then continued slicing roots.

"That's not what I expected you to ask."

"Alexia and Marius Gray. Alexia Bennett before she was married," Freddie said, swallowing nervously.

"Oh. Yes. They were older, quite a bit older. I didn't know them well."

"They're in Azkaban," she said.

"Yes."

"You're not."

His left arm twitched reflexively.

"No. I'm not."

"Why? Why them and not you?" she demanded, hating the way her voice trembled. "My uncle says...they were brave. Brave for not naming names, for going down for Him, for their beliefs, that I should be...proud."

He stared at her, not speaking. Just staring with his dark eyes.

"The others, some of the others, they said names to avoid prison, they- did...did you-"

"No," he said quietly. "No, Miss Gray, I did not name your parents names to save my skin."

"Then how-"

"I do not owe you any explanations, Miss Gray," he said in a low, dangerous tone.

"I'm sorry," she said immediately, turning back to her roots. She continued slicing, not speaking for several minutes. "I'm not proud of them."

Snape glanced at her but did not speak.

"My Uncle Cecil says I should be proud they went to prison for the Dark Lord, but I'm not. I don't think they were brave or noble, I think they were _stupid_," she said bitterly. "I was just a _kid_. They shouldn't have stood by Him, they should have stood by _me_, I'm their _daughter_."

Snape was staring at her but she was cutting her roots, not looking at him. He put a hand on her arm and she froze, looking up at him.

"You're not slicing thin enough," he said quietly, releasing her arm.

"Oh. Sorry," she said, correcting her mistake. "And...sorry."

"Just...focus on your work," he said. His voice wasn't cold or mean, just quiet. Freddie nodded and smiled weakly.

"I can do that."

#

As Freddie headed back down to her dormitory later that evening she mentally berated herself. She hadn't meant to open up to Snape the way she had. She'd talked more about her parents to him than she had to anyone in the last 6 years.

_Just don't think about them. They didn't think about you when they got themselves locked up, _she thought as she shed her robes and changed into her black satin nightgown. _Just focus on work, like Snape said. Ahh...Snape._

She smiled as she crawled into bed, remembering the way it felt when he showed her how to cut the asphodel roots. She hadn't let herself feel it at the time, hadn't let herself soak it in. She did so now, recalling the warmth of him behind her, the way his hands felt covering hers. She'd thought his hands would be calloused, but they weren't. They'd been soft and warm.

Freddie imagined what it would be like if he touched her elsewhere. A thrill went through her at the thought of Snape's hands on her breasts, her hips, lower...

_Good girl_...

His words echoed in her mind, sending a surge of heat through her. She trailed her hands down her stomach, imagining it was Snape touching her.

_Good girl..._

#

Freddie continued working with Snape on the Wolfsbane Potion throughout the month of September. The last weekend of the month she and Daniel walked down to Hogsmeade with the other older students. They spent the day going in and out of shops, enjoying the cool weather. They ate a late lunch at the Three Broomsticks, sitting at a table outside. Daniel was checking out the pieces of a glass chess set he'd gotten from Dervish and Banges as they drank Butterbeer.

"Hey Daniel, did you see this?" Geck asked, approaching their table with a flier in his hand.

"What is it?" Freddie asked as Daniel looked over the paper.

"A carnival!" he said enthusiastically, handing it to her. "With games and rides and stuff!"

"Cool!" Freddie declared. "Weekend after next – I'll be done with the potion by then, we could spend the whole day there."

"Awesome! We can-"

There was a loud pop and Snape apparated next to them. Geck took off, quickly returning to his own table.

"Professor Snape," Freddie said, surprised.

"Miss Gray," he said. "Madam Pomfrey has a patient who was bitten by a kelpie. I thought you may be interested in assisting me in brewing a rather complex healing potion – although I did not intend to interrupt your _date_."

Daniel hid behind his mug of Butterbeer and Freddie's face grew warm.

"It's not- he's not-" she spluttered and Snape smirked. Her frustration grew and the mug in front of her exploded.

"Crap," she said, pulling out her wand to repair it.

"Yes or no, Miss Gray," Snape said, sounding bored.

"Uh- yes," she said, standing up and picking up her bag of goodies from Hogsmeade. She dug around her pocket and left a few coins for her meal. "Catch you later?"

"Later," Daniel said, waving to her.

She followed Snape down the street, glancing over her shoulder to see Geck joining Daniel at his table.

"How old are you, Miss Gray?" Snape asked as she struggled to keep up.

"I'll be 17 in February – and if you're about to ask me why I don't have a boyfriend, I don't like him like that! We-"

"I could care less about your love life, Miss Gray," he said with a withering look. "I was asking if you were old enough to Apparate back to the gate, the answer to which is no."

"Oh," she said, feeling stupid. "I mean, I probably _could_."

"No. You're not splinching yourself on my watch," he said sternly. "I don't want to clean up the mess."

Freddie scoffed and rolled her eyes. They continued walking up the path to Hogwarts.

"So," he said. "Why aren't you dating the Byrd boy? You seem to spend all of your time with him."

"Ew! We've been best friends for _years_ he's like a brother to me!" she declared.

"Calm down – before you break something else," he said, smirking. "You know most _children _learn to control their magic when they start school."

"I'm not a child!" she snapped, and the grass on the sides of the path withered. She flushed. "...It only happens when I'm feeling something strong – usually when I'm _pissed off_."

"Language," he warned but there was a faint tone of amusement in his voice. "You can't redirect it? Your energy?"

"Not always," she admitted. "Sometimes I can focus on something else, but certain things... Art helps. I can focus my energy, my magic, my mood, onto a canvas or clay. Any kind of medium."

"So art is your outlet," he said with a slow nod. "I always considered it a weak subject, but if it helps..."

"It does."

They reached the gates of Hogwarts and headed across the lawn.

"So, a kelpie bite?" Freddie asked.

"How did that happen?"

"A stupid Gryffindor boy lost a bet to his stupid Gryffindor friends and went for a swim in the Black Lake, without clothing."

"There's kelpies in the lake?"

"There aren't supposed to be. I suspect Professor Kettleburn or Hagrid are responsible. Dumbledore will deal with them."

"He should. And Professor Kettleburn, Hagrid, they should know better! Kelpies are dangerous!"

"The boy could've been killed," the said simultaneously. Their eyes met and Freddie smiled. Snape looked away.

"What do we need for the Healing Potion?" she asked as they entered the castle and headed down to the dungeons. He listed off a dozen or so ingredients and Freddie began to gather them as soon as they entered his office.

#

Six hours later they were almost finished with the healing potion when there was a noise from the other room. They left the potions and stepped out into Snape's office to find a small, soot-covered owl flapping around the bottom of the fireplace with a letter in its beak.

Snape knelt to take the letter, then stood up to read it.

"Thank you," Freddie said to the owl, brushing the soot from its feathers. The owl hooted dolefully and flew off up the chimney.

"_That's _how you get your mail? What if there's a fire going?" Freddie asked but Snape paid her no mind, his dark eyes scanning the letter.

"Ah," he said, folding up the letter and putting it in his pocket. "Good."

"What is it?" Freddie asked curiously.

"A rare potion ingredients has become available," he said, getting his traveling cloak and fastening it around his neck. "Take the healing potion up to Madam Pomfrey and return to your dormitory."

"W-can't I go with you?" she asked and Snape stopped at the door.

"You're a student," he said. "And it's already late."

"It's only 8 o'clock," she pointed out. "And I'm your apprentice. Isn't it important for me to learn, like, haggling for potion ingredients or whatever?"

He considered her a moment then turned back to the door.

"Take the potion to the Hospital Wing," he said sternly. "I will speak to Dumbledore."

"Dumbledore?"

"I can't take a student from the castle without the Headmaster's permission."

"Thank you!" she said enthusiastically, rushing back into the Brewing Lab to bottle the potion.

"He might say no," he cautioned. "Meet me back here when you're finished."

"Yes sir!" she said happily.

#

Freddie took the potion to Madam Pomfrey as quickly as possible before returning to the dungeons. She waited for Snape, pacing the room impatiently.

_What if Dumbledore says no? What if he isn't even really gone to ask him, what if he just said that so he could leave without me bothering him?_

She sat in Snape's chair and put her feet up on his desk. She looked at the pile of papers on his desk. Half graded papers from what she guessed were first years.

Her eyes strayed to the locked drawer and she wondered, again, what might be in it.

_Something illegal? Dark materials? Poisons? A shrine to me?_

She chuckled aloud at the last possibility. Wishful thinking. To distract herself she picked up one of the essays to read. Her lip curled in disgust at the barely-legible, factually incorrect essay.

"What are you doing?" Snape asked as the door opened.

"How do you not throw half of these into the fire? They're rubbish!" she declared.

"The thought has crossed my mind," he said. "Get your feet off my desk."

Freddie did as told, wondering If he'd been able to see up her skirt.

"What did Dumbledore say?" she asked eagerly.

"Get your cloak," he said.

"Yes! Field trip!" she declared, rushing to get her cloak from the other room.

"Don't make me regret this," he warned.

"How are we getting to wherever we're going?" she asked, fastening her cloak.

"Floo powder," he said, taking a pot off the shelf above the fireplace. "Since you can't Apparate. I assume you've traveled by Floo Powder before?"

"Of course."

"Good," he said, offering her the pot. She took a handful of the glittering powder. "We're going to Diagon Alley."

"Got it."

"After you," he indicated.

Freddie tossed her handful of powder into the hearth. Immediately green flames roared to life. She cleared her throat and stepped into the flames.

"Diagon Alley," she said clearly and immediately she felt herself being whisked away.


	9. Chapter 9

Freddie appeared in a bar she recognized immediately as The Leaky Cauldron. Several old wizards turned to look at her when she stepped out of the flames and suddenly she felt very young and out of place. She looked down at herself self-consciously. She was wearing her favorite black lace-up boots, a knee-length black skirt, and a green v-neck sweater under her black traveling cloak.

The flames whooshed behind her and Snape stepped out of the fireplace. Immediately the staring wizards went back to minding their own business.

"Come," Snape said and Freddie followed him through the pub to the back entrance, which led to Diagon Alley.

Freddie had been to Diagon Alley dozens of times before with her aunt and uncle, but rarely at night. The alley was beautiful at night. The streets were lit by lamp posts every few feet and the storefronts were lit up, casting a glow on the sidewalk in front of them.

A few witches and wizards walked around the village. It seemed almost serene as Freddie followed Snape down the sidewalk.

Freddie walked a few steps behind pausing periodically to look at the displays in store windows before catching back up. Madam Malkins, the place where she got her school robes, had a sign in the window, announcing they had an Invisibility Cloak for sale. Intrigued, Freddie wondered how much it cost.

_Probably more than I could ever afford, _she thought wistfully.

"Keep up, Miss Gray," Snape said and she jogged to watch up.

She had assumed they were going to the Apothecary and was surprised when Snape turned to go down Knockturn Alley. She'd been there a few times with her uncle. It was full of dark wizards and illegal trades. It was the one place she wasn't allowed to go by herself. Even her uncle said it was a dangerous place for a young girl.

"Stay close to me," Snape warned as they started down. "And if anyone asks we went to the Apothecary."

"Yes sir," she said, a thrill going through her.

Freddie walked close beside him. There were no lamp posts lighting the way, only starlight and the dim light of candles in a few windows. It was so dark Freddie didn't even see the disheveled wizard sitting against a wall until they walked past him and he hissed at her, making a lunge for her ankles.

In a flash Snape hit him with a Stinging Hex and the man jumped back grabbing his face as if he'd been slapped.

"Come," Snape said, linking his arm with hers. "You are safe here with me."

Freddie nodded, her heart pounding. She wasn't worried about her ability to defend herself – she'd have hexed the man himself but Snape had been faster with his wand. But she was not about to protest, not when it meant having Snape's arm linked with hers as they walked down the dark alley. She pressed herself closer, enjoying the warmth of his body next to her.

"You don't have to be scared," he said, looking down at her with a smirk. Freddie didn't respond, but squeezed his arm slightly.

They rounded a corner, then Snape led her into a shop. She recognized it immediately from the oddities lining the shelves. She'd been here countless times with her uncle. She even recognized the young man standing at the counter.

"Good evening, sir," the teen began in a bored voice. "Welcome to Borgins and B- _Winnie? _Winnie Gray is that you?"

"Hi Ryan," she said sheepishly. "What's up?"

"You know each other?" Snape asked, releasing her arm now that they were inside the store.

"Yeah, we used to date like two years ago!" Ryan said, much to Freddie's dismay. "It's good to see you again, Winnie. What brings you here? Aren't you still in school?"

"She is," Snape said. "She's my apprentice. We're here to talk to Mr Burke about some venomous tentacula leaves he came into possession of."

"Oh yeah, those. Burke's my uncle, he left me in charge of the shop tonight. You can talk to me."

"You are a child," Snape said disdainfully.

"I'm not, I'm 20 years old," Ryan said hotly.

"Do you have the tentacula leaves?"

"I do," Ryan said, pulling out a box and setting it on the counter. He opened it, revealing at least a dozen leaves.

"I'll give you 5 galleons a leaf," Snape said.

"What? My uncle would flay me alive!" Ryan said, laughing. "10 galleons a leaf."

"Nonsense," Snape snorted. "I am not negotiating with a child. I will return in the morning, when your uncle is available."

"Wait," Ryan said, leaning across the counter and giving Freddie a sly grin. "Since it's for you, Winnie-" Freddie felt herself prickle at the nickname and the candles in the shop flickered til Snape put a hand on the small of her back, calming her instantly – or at least distracting her enough so that she didn't get madder. "-Since we're friends...I'll do 80 galleons for the lot. _If _you send me an owl sometime. Maybe we can hang out over winter break?"

"Sure," Freddie said through gritted teeth.

"Sold," Snape said, pulling a coin pouch out of his pocket.

"Promise me, Winnie," Ryan said, waving the box teasingly. "Promise you'll send me an owl."

"I promise," she said, forcing herself to smile.

Freddie couldn't wait to get out of the shop. She felt annoyed and embarrassed, even as Snape linked his arm with hers.

"It seems it was a good idea to bring you along after all," Snape said as they walked away.

"To embarrass me?" she muttered.

"We got a good deal," he said with a shrug. "You could have told him off."

"I wanted you to get what you needed. I don't intend to keep my promise – I'm not owl'ing him

over winter break or any other time. He's...ugh. A pretentious ass."

"Language, Miss Gray," he said, then glanced at his watch. "It seems I've caused you to miss dinner again," Snape said, leading her down the alley. "Would you like to have dinner before we return to Hogwarts?"

"Oh...okay," she agreed, quickly becoming excited at the idea. "The Leaky Cauldron?"

"No, it's too public. I can't be seen dining with a student. Dumbledore, Hagrid, and a few others frequent the Leaky Cauldron. I know a better place. Come."

Freddie stayed close to Snape as he led her through the dark, winding, path, to parts of the alley she had never even been to. They passed few people and the ones they did gave them a wide berth. Freddie had to admit, she did feel safe with Snape. He might be a grumpy git but she knew he'd never let anything happen to her.

He led her into a building at the end of the alley. There was a small sign above the door, barely-legible in the dark, that read 'The Silver Serpent'. It was a small restaurant, dimly lit by a glowing stone floor. There was a single candle at each table, giving off just enough light to see the tables but not the faces of the witches and wizards who sat at them.

Snape led her to a table in the corner. She started to sit, but he stopped her.

"I will sit on that side," he insisted. "I want to be able to see the door."

Freddie nodded briefly and took the seat across from him. Immediately a hooded waiter appeared.

"Good evening," he said, his voice raspy. "May I interest you in two glasses of elf wine? It's very popular this evening."

"Yes, please," Freddie said immediately and Snape gave her a withering look. She gave him an innocent shrug, waiting to see if he would tell her no.

"Scotch for me," he said to the waiter.

The man nodded and disappeared.

"I should not allow you to drink alcohol," he said, crossing his arms. "You are a student, but I did not want to point that out in front of the waiter, not here."

"I'm 16," she said haughtily. "Almost 17. My uncle lets me drink wine at his dinner parties."

"Hmm," Snape said, then picked up the menu that had appeared before him. Freddie picked up her menu, squinting to read it in the candlelight. When the waiter returned with their drinks, Snape put his menu down.

"I will have the steak," he said. "Medium-rare. Baked potato, butter only."

"Excellent choice," rasped the waiter, taking his menu. "And for you, miss?"

"The same," she said, handing him her menu. "Thank you."

The waiter nodded and waved his wand over the table. A basket of rolls appeared, steam coming off of them. They smelled delicious and Freddie's stomach growled. She grabbed a roll and was about to shove it in her mouth but paused.

_Manners, Winifred! _Her aunt's voice echoed in her head. She exhaled slowly then picked up a knife to spread better on the bread before taking a dainty bite. She made herself eat it slowly, taking small sips of her wine.

The wine was good. It had a sweet undertone, but it was strong. When her glass got low it automatically refilled.

"How are your classes going?" Snape asked, sipping his scotch while they waited on their food.

"You already know the answer to that," Freddie chuckled.

"I know your grades, I am not privy to your performance in each classroom."

Freddie felt a little fuzzy from the wine but she figured he was trying to make conversation with her.

"They're fine, I guess," she said with a shrug. "Professor Kettleburn has been showing us different creatures in the Dark Forest – I think he's looking for his chimera, did you know he's lost one?"

"I had heard that," he said with a small nod. "I am not surprised it got away. I _am _surprised he brought another chimera around – the last one was responsible for the loss of his leg."

"_Really_?" Freddie asked, intrigued. "What about his hand? That metal claw of his freaks me out a bit."

"A dragon, if I'm not mistaken. He was attempting to remove a branch stuck in the throat of a Peruvian Vipertooth."

"Their venom is deadly! How'd he even survive that?"

"He was able to contain the venom to his left hand to slow the progression. It had reached his elbow by the time he made it to a Healer. Amputation was the only option at that point."

"Wow," Freddie said, taking another drink of her wine.

"Mm. What about your other classes? Charms? Transfiguration?"

"Oh, McGonagall said next week we'll be studying human to animal transfiguration. Spells that can turn you into an animal – not like Animagi. That would be cool though."

"You think so?" Snape asked, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Definitely! It's supposed to be extremely difficult though, right? I mean, even you're not...uh, are you?"

"No, Miss Gray, I'm not. To be honest the idea of becoming an animal never appealed to me."

"What? Why not? Why wouldn't you want to be an animal? You could sneak around, unnoticed – maybe even fly if you were a bird or a bat."

"I an already move around undetected. And one can fly with a broom."

"I don't buy it," she said, shaking her head. "You had to have thought about it at some point."

"When I was in school I had a classmate – a stupid Gryffindor boy – who could transform into a rat. I once witnessed him get scooped up by a hawk and he was carried halfway across the grounds before he transformed back and fell. He broke both arms," he said, smirking in amusement.

"Yeah, a rat wouldn't be a good one," she chuckled. "But something fierce like a tiger – or a dragon even! Has there ever been a dragon Animagus?"

"I don't know. They would be a question for Professor McGonagall."

The waiter approached their table, levitating their plates in front of him. As soon as the plate landed in front of her, Freddie's mouth began to water. The steak looked perfect.

"Can I get you anything else?" the waiter asked.

"No," Snape said.

"No, thank you," Freddie said politely, minding her manners, as her aunt would say.

The man inclined his head and disappeared. Freddie sat up a little straighter and placed her napkin in her lap. She used the knife to cut a small piece off of her steak and took a bite. As the flavor flooded over her tongue she couldn't suppress a small moan. The meat was seasoned perfectly and wonderfully tender. _Even a toothless person could eat this_.

Snape looked at her queerly and Freddie's cheeks grew warm as she realized how inappropriate her moan had sounded.

"It's really good," she said sheepishly.

He nodded in agreement and continued eating.

Freddie was focused on her food and using proper table etiquette and using proper table etiquette that had been drilled into her head since she was a child. She could feel Snape's eyes on her but when she looked up to take a drink of her wine he wasn't looking at her.

_I'm not crazy. I know he's watching me, I can _feel _it._

"I suppose you do have adequate table manners after all," Snape spoke, amusement in his tone. Freddie swallowed the last of her steak and patted her mouth with her napkin.

"My Aunt Millicent made sure of it," she said. "At home _every _meal is laid out with a ton of silverware. It's like we're dining with the freaking Queen every single meal."

She rolled her eyes and took a deep drink of her wine. "If I don't use proper table manners at home, I don't get to eat. Then if they catch me sneaking food after, my aunt will hex my fingers," she said irritably. "When I'm at Hogwarts is the only time I can be my true self. Eat whatever I want, however I want."

"Your true self is a slob," he teased.

"Maybe a little," she admitted with a chuckle.

Freddie drank another glass of wine while Snape finished his meal. The waiter brought the check and Freddie pulled out her wallet to pay for her food.

"Put that away," Snape said dismissively, pulling out enough galleons to pay for both meals.

"You don't have to do that," she protested, her words slightly slurred from the alcohol.

"Your relationship with the Burke boy saved me more money than I expected. Besides, it is the proper thing to do."

"It wasn't a _relationship_," she scoffed, rolling her eyes again. "It was...uh..."

He raised his eyebrow, waiting for her to continue.

"It was _one _summer. Barely."

"And here I thought the only thing on your mind was potions," he said lightly.

"It was – _is_. Ryan was just...I was bored," she said defensively.

Snape's mouth curled into a smile and he stood.

"We should go," he said. "It's getting late."

Freddie stood and the world spun around her.

"Whoa," she said, reaching out for the table to steady herself.

"Are you drunk?" he asked.

"_Nooo_," she said unconvincingly.

"You are a terrible liar," he said, grabbing her arm. "Come."

"I'll have you know, I'm a _great _liar," she said loudly as she stumbled out of the bar. "I lie about a lot of things. Like how you're secretly nice. I don't go blabbing that to every Tom Dick and Harry. Hehe."

She giggled and Snape gripped her arm harder.

"You're drunk," he hissed, half-dragging her up the street. "I can't take you back to school drunk."

Freddie clutched his arm with both hands, feeling giddy. She was drunk and alone in a dark alley with Severus Snape.

_A dream come true, _she thought with a grin. She started giggling again and a ball of light appeared above their heads. Snape swatted at it and Freddie giggled harder.

"Stop – what is that?" he said, swatting at it again.

"I think it's me," she said between peals of laughter.

"Shut up," he said, his fingers digging into her arm.

"Oww," she whined and the light vanished.

"You're drawing unnecessary attention to us," he said, annoyed, and began walking faster. Freddie tried to keep up but she was light-headed and her feet kept stumbling uncooperatively. Snape's fingers were digging into her arm and starting to hurt and she was becoming annoyed.

"Cut it out," she whined.

"Quiet," he said harshly.

Freddie felt her anger bubbling and before she could stop it she sent out an electric shock that made Snape let go of her.

"Shit," he swore, grabbing his hand.

"Language, Professor," she teased and he grabbed her by the back of her robes, pushing her ahead of him until they stepped out of the dark into the twinkling lights of Diagon Alley.

"Sit," he said, pushing her towards a bench.

Freddie sat, grateful to have something solid to sit on. She looked around, thinking how pretty the lights looked, while Snape dug around in his pockets.

"Drink this," he said, producing a small vial of potion.

"No," she said defiantly.

"It will sober you up, it's-"

"I know what it is. I'm drunk not dumb. I'm not a first year. And I don't wanna drink it. You can't make me."

"You're acting like a child," he hissed. "Drink it or I'll hold you down and pour it down her throat."

Images of Snape holding her down in the middle of the street floated through her mind and she began to giggle again. She clamped her mouth shut and glared at him defiantly. Snape scoffed, shoved the vial back in his pocket, and grabbed her arm. Freddie started to protest, but suddenly Diagon Alley disappeared. It was dark and Freddie felt like she was being squashed on all sides. She couldn't breathe or move her body.

_What kind of Dark Magic is this?_

When the ground reappeared beneath her feet Freddie fell flat on her butt. She quickly got on all fours and heaved, emptying the contents of her stomach onto the grass.

"What did you do to me?" she demanded angrily, then retched again.

"We Apparated," Snape replied coolly.

Freddie looked up to see they were outside the gates to Hogwarts.

"Come," he said to her, waving his wand to open the gates.

"I need a minute," Freddie said, rocking back on her heels. "...Please."

She felt like she might puke again but there was nothing left in her stomach. A painfully strong headache had developed behind her eyes. She dry-heaved a few more times before trying to get up. Snape helped her to her feet.

"Not pleasant, is it?" Snape asked dryly as they made their way across the grounds. "Maybe next time you'll listen to me."

"Yes sir," she said weakly.

She no longer felt drunk or giddy. She just felt sick. When they entered the castle, Snape pointed to the dungeons.

"Bed," he said sharply.

Freddie nodded obediently and headed down the stone staircase to the Slytherin dormitories. As soon as she reached her bed, she collapsed into it. She didn't bother getting undressed, just kicked her boots off and pulled the quilt over herself. She was asleep in seconds.

**Authors Note: Merry Christmas everyone! No holiday plans tomorrow so I will likely get some writing done. Hope you all have a lovely holiday and if you can spare the time to leave me a review and let me know what you think so far! Thanks!**


	10. Chapter 10

#

Freddie didn't wake until late the next morning and only then because someone was shaking her.

"Go away," she moaned, pulling the pillow over her head.

"Sorry to wake you, Freddie," said Maggie's voice. "But Professor Snape is looking for you."

Freddie groaned and sat up, feeling terrible. Her head and stomach ached and she felt sore all over.

"Jeez, you look like shit," Maggie said. "Want me to tell him you're sick? Maybe you should go to the nurse."

"No, m'fine. Where is he?" she asked, getting to her feet and stretching.

"He said to send you to his office. Are you in trouble?"

"Maybe," she answered truthfully.

"Is it cuz you snuck out last night? You weren't here when I went to bed. Where were you? Were you out with a _boy_? Who is it? Anyone I know? Is it Daniel?"

"No! Jeez."

"It's not a _Hufflepuff _is it – oh tell me it's not a Gryffindor?"

"Wh- there's no boy! Jesus, Maggie, go away and let me get dressed."

"Hmph," Maggie said, wrinkling her noise before turning to go. "You might want to shower first – you smell like something dead."

"Ha ha," Freddie said sarcastically.

When Maggie left, Freddie pulled the curtains around her bed. She got undressed and used the spells Daniel had taught her to get cleaned up quickly. She put on clean clothes – black slacks and a black t-shirt – then sat on the edge of her bed to put her boots on.

She looked longingly at her bed, wanting nothing more than to lay down and go back to sleep for the rest of the day. But she knew Snape was mad at her and ignoring his summons would only make him madder.

_Just let him yell at me, give me detention, whatever. Then I can go back to sleep, she_ thought wearily, leaving her dormitory.

"Hey Freddie!" Alexander called from a nearby table and she winced, the pain in her head increasing.

"What?" she asked irritably.

"What's the incantation to reverse a buggered transfiguration?" he asked. "I'm drowning in homework and my brain won't work right anymore."

"_Reparifarge_," she answered automatically. "And be sure not to use the word 'buggered' in your essay."

"Thanks," he said gratefully, scribbling it down. "Uh..."

"Say 'unsuccessful or partial transformations'," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Thanks," he said again.

She grunted and left the Common Room.

Freddie made her way to Snape's office. Even the sound of her own footsteps on the stone sounded too loud and annoying. When she reached Snape's office, she braced herself and knocked.

"Come in," said Snape's smooth voice.

Freddie opened the door to find Snape sitting at his desk, papers in front of him. She shut the door behind her and stood hands behind her back.

"You wanted to see me, sir?" she asked quietly. He put down his quill and looked up at her, his dark eyes unreadable.

"How are you feeling?" he asked stiffly.

"Honestly? Like a dragon chewed me up, spit me out, then stomped me."

"Good," he said darkly. He picked up his wand, waved it, and three small vials appeared on his desk. "Drink these."

Freddie approached his desk, not caring what was in the vials.

_It could be poison for all I care, _she thought miserably. _I couldn't possibly feel worse. _

She uncorked the first vial and the smell of ginger wafted out. _Zingiber Draught _she identified as she drank it down. Immediately her stomach felt better and she actually felt hungry which she hadn't thought possible. She quickly uncorked and downed the other two potions. Her headache vanished and her muscles spasmed a few times before relaxing, no longer sore.

"Wow. Oh wow. I feel so much better. Thank you," she said appreciatively, sinking into the chair in front of his desk. "And...I'm really sorry. About last night. I've never felt like that from wine before."

"Properly aged elf wine is uncommonly strong," he said, his expression unreadable.

"Yeah. Worst field trip ever," she said with a weak smile. "I don't think I'll ever drink again. Not even Butterbeer. Ugh."

"If you had taken the antidote and not been so _stubborn_...it would not have been an unbearable excursion."

"I'm sorry," she said again. "I'll never disobey you again. I swear."

"I should hope not," he said dryly.

There was a moment of silence between them.

"Are you going to give me detention?" she asked uneasily.

"I think your Post-Apparition sickness and subsequent hangover were punishment enough, don't you?"

"Yes sir," she agreed quickly. "If that was used as a detention no student would ever misbehave again!"

"I am not _that _cruel," Snape said with a hint of a smile. Freddie smiled back.

"What are you working on?" she asked, nodding to his desk.

"Grading the rest of the first year essays you saw last night," he answered with a soft sigh. "I'd rather suffer a hangover than read this rubbish, but I have to finish them before class tomorrow so I can return them."

"Maybe I could help?" Freddie offered uncertainly. "I think I've written enough essays over the years to know how you grade papers."

"You've never scored anything below Acceptable in my class," he said with a half-smile. "But suit yourself. Pull your chair up."

Snape split the remainder of the ungraded essays with her and gave her a quill with red ink to make marks with. Freddie pulled her chair closer to his desk, pleased to be able to help, and extra-pleased that he didn't seem to be too angry with her.

When the lunch bell rang a few minutes later, Freddie didn't even look up from the essay she was marking. Snape picked up his wand again and gave it a quick wave. A large plate of hot chips appeared between them.

"Some Muggles swear by them to cure a hangover," Snape said, taking a chip from the pile. "They might help settle your stomach – and they're easy to eat while grading."

"Thank you," Freddie said, surprised. Snape nodded and resumed grading.

#

It took the two of them a little over an hour to complete the grading. Freddie found that almost all of them were terrible, but there were at least a handful of students who seemed to be getting the hang of things.

"No wonder you're in such a _bad mood _all the time. You have to read this drivel," Freddie snorted. "Does it ever get better?"

"They get more legible around the third year," he said with a smirk. "But most of them are idiots. Until 6th year when I can hand-pick the best students to continue...but there's always first years and I swear each new lot is worse than the last."

"I'm glad I don't have your job – I wouldn't survive it," Freddie said dramatically.

"If I can, you could," he said, still smirking. "But my job is not likely to be up for grabs any time soon."

_Unless you get the Defense Against the Dark Arts position, _she thought to herself.

"There are a few who make the job worth it. A few who are gifted and have a genuine interest in potions."

"Am I one of them?" she asked, grinning at him. "Am I a pleasure to teach?"

"You're _something_," he said with a tone of amusement. "It's almost 2 o'clock. You should go. Go outside, enjoy the sunshine, hang out with your friends – or _friend_, I should say."

"I have more than one friend," she laughed. "Daniel just happens to be the best of the lot."

"I can't imagine why," he said dryly, then waved her off. "Go, Miss Gray...thank you for your assistance."

It sounded as though it physically pained him to thank her, but Freddie beamed as she turned to go.

"One more thing," Snape said and Freddie stopped with her hand on the door. "Tonight is the full moon."

"Yes sir?"

"As you know there are several plants used in potion-brewing that are more potent when harvested under a full moon. As you are my apprentice, I think it would be appropriate for you to assist me in harvesting ingredients this evening in the forest."

Freddie was momentarily speechless. She had come to Snape's office expecting to be punished. But this, this was the opposite of a punishment.

"Seriously?" she said finally,.

"Assuming another late night will not affect your performance in your classes tomorrow morning?"

"No, sir, of course not."

"Then meet me in the Entrance Hall at 9 o'clock."

"Yes sir! Thank you!"


	11. Chapter 11

**Authors Note: Tonight's late night update is brought to you, Tinkerbell, who has left 20 reviews on my story in the last 24 hours. i definitely love you for that! Posting two chapters now as a thank you. I told myself if even one person enjoyed my story then it is definitely worth writing. Thank you and enjoy!**

#

Freddie left the dungeons in search of Daniel. She checked the Great Hall first. There were a few students there studying, but Daniel wasn't among them. She stood in the Entrance Hall and took out her wand.

"Find Daniel," she said. Her wand shivered in her hand then pointed towards the door.

Freddie walked out onto the grounds following the direction of her wand until she spotted Daniel. He was hanging out under a large maple tree with Geck and a handful of other Ravenclaws. They were listening to his record player.

"Freddie! What the hell happened to you yesterday?" Daniel asked as she flopped down beside him.

"I'll tel you about it later," she murmured and he nodded in agreement. "Wanna go for a fly?"

"We were just talking about getting enough people together to play a little Quidditch," Geck spoke up. "You down?"

"Hell yeah," she agreed.

"Freddie gets to be on my team," Daniel declared immediately, getting to his feet. "We always play against each other – if we play together we'll be unbeatable!"

"Cool. I'll find some more people," Geck said.

"I know some Gryffindors who'll want to play," said another Ravenclaw.

"Let's meet on the field in 15," Geck said decisively.

They all split up and Freddie and Daniel made their way down to the Quidditch pitch. She quickly filled him in on the events of the previous night and Snape's plans for the evening.

"Knockturn Alley, _at night_?" Daniel said. "I won't even go down there in broad daylight! I can't believe Dumbledore approved that!"

"Well he didn't exactly. Snape told me if anyone asked, we didn't go down there."

"What if something had happened to you? You could've been kidnapped – or worse!"

"Snape wouldn't have let anything bad happen to me," she argued. "Besides, you really think someone could kidnap _me_? I'd blast them to bits."

"Maybe. What about tonight? The Forbidden Forest on a full moon? Aren't you scared?"

"Uh, _no_. Not at all," she said haughtily. "I can take care of myself."

"I dunno, Fred. There's werewolves and god knows what else in there. It seems like he's intentionally putting you in dangerous situations."

"He's not," she scoffed. "It's part of my apprenticeship training. I'm learning a ton."

"I can't say I like it," he said, shaking his head.

"You don't have to," she said with a shrug.

Geck and a group of students met them on the field a short while later. Daniel had set his record player up and it was blaring Queen as the students ascended into the air. It was a mix of Ravenclaw and Gryffindors. Freddie noticed some of the Gryffindors sang along to the music.

_Mudbloods_, she thought, rolling her eyes.

Freddie, Daniel, and Geck were chasers for the Ravenclaw team. They worked together like a well-oiled machine.

"I wish you were a Ravenclaw!" Geck called to her as she scored yet another goal, right past the Gryffindor keeper.

"Then you'd actually stand a chance against Slytherin in the finals," she shouted back with a grin.

A bludger zoomed towards her and Freddie dropped quickly so it missed her. It hit Daniel who was about to score and he dropped the Quaffle. Freddie zoomed towards it and grabbed it, circling back around to try and score another goal but she was distracted by Daniel as he was hit by yet another bludger. He lost control of his broom and was spiraling down when a Gryffindor keeper snatched the ball from Freddie. She started to go after the Gryffindor boy but looked down to see Daniel pull up at the last minute to avoid hitting the ground.

She heard peals of laughter behind her and saw a blonde Gryffindor girl with a bat watching Daniel and giggling.

Daniel got back in the game but Freddie kept an eye on him. She couldn't help but notice an unusual number of bludgers were directed at him, which allowed her and Geck to score several goals. But when Daniel was hit by a bludger that nearly knocked him from his broom. Freddie rounded on the blonde beater who was laughing again.

"What's your problem?" she demanded.

"Chill," the girl said, rolling her eyes. "It's just a game."

"I'm fine, Freddie – watch your back!" Daniel called and she pulled up to avoid a bludger.

The game continued much the same way and Freddie grew increasingly annoyed. She tried to focus on her own position but she was glad when Perkins caught the snitch and the game was over. Her team had won.

"What's that girl's problem?" Freddie muttered to Daniel as they walked over to the stands to retrieve his record player.

"Dunno," he said with a shrug, glancing over his shoulder. "But she's coming this way."

"What?"

Freddie looked back to see the blonde girl skipping towards them.

"Hi!" she said cheerfully. "You're Daniel, right?"

"Uh, yeah," he said, his ears turning red.

"I like your record player. You've got good taste in music."

"Thanks," he said with a grin. "You're uh, 5th year, right?"

"Uh-huh. My name's Heather. Heather Ross. You got any other records?"

"Loads," he said with a nod. "Wanna see?"

"Sure."

Daniel looked pointedly at Freddie and she rolled her eyes at him.

"Later. I'm gonna go get cleaned up," she said, walking away, leaving Daniel alone with the flirty Gryffindor.

"That's not your girlfriend, is it?" she heard Heather ask as she walked away.

"Nah, just a friend," Daniel answered.

"Good."


	12. Chapter 12

#

Freddie was in a mood when she went to meet Snape in the Entrance Hall that night. She'd planned to sit with Daniel at dinner and work on homework afterwards, but he hadn't even been at the Ravenclaw table. He'd been at the Gryffindor table with Heather and they left together before dinner was over.

Freddie had gone back to her dorm after dinner and worked on homework alone with the curtains drawn around her bed so she'd be left alone. She told herself it was better this way. She could get more work done alone. But really, it wasn't as fun as studying with Daniel.

_I can't be jealous_, she told herself as she trudged up the stairs at 9 o'clock. _I don't like him like that anyway. He _should _have a girlfriend, he's never even dated anyone. He's allowed to have other friends than me, he's allowed to date. Even if it is a stupid Gryffindor mudblood. _

She slammed the door to the dungeons shut behind her as she reached the Entrance Hall. She let out a huff and went to sit at the bottom of the Grand Staircase to wait on Snape.

"What's wrong with you?" Snape asked, stepping out of the shadows.

"Nothing," she muttered, getting to her feet. He looked her over with a penetrating gaze that made her slightly uncomfortable.

"Boy troubles?" he quipped.

"_No_," she snarled and the flame on the torches along the walls flared. He raised an eyebrow at her.

"You can go back to your dormitory if you prefer?" he asked dryly.

"God, no," she said quickly. "No, please. Let's just go."

He inclined his head and she followed him out of the castle.

The moon was shining brightly, illuminating the deserted grounds.

"What are we going to do now that the Wolfsbane Potion is done?" Freddie asked as they crossed the grounds.

"Vanish it. I only did it to test my own abilities," he answered.

"No, I mean...will I still be your apprentice?" she asked uncertainly. "Or was this a one time deal?"

He looked at her curiously and she looked away, afraid of his answer. She'd grown fond of working with Snape over the past month. She didn't want that to end.

"Yes," he said decisively and Freddie looked up at him. "I will continue working with you to help you further develop your skills as a potion-maker. You have great potential, that should not go to waste. I will find complex potions for you to attempt and you can continue to assist me with my own projects."

Freddie smiled gratefully. Her mood improved as they continued towards the forest.

"There are a few potions I can think of that I'd be interested in trying," she said.

"Such as?"

"Polyjuice Potion for one," she said. "Maybe Veritaserum. Felix Felicis for sure, I know it's really complicated. I read it takes 6 months to brew!"

"That is correct. I can make that happen," he said with a nod. "Assuming you don't intend to use any of them for something...treacherous."

"Of course not."

"Then I will arrange it. If you wish to brew Felix Felicis we should start it as soon as possible."

As they reached the edge of the forest, Snape paused. He waved his wand and two wicker baskets appeared.

"We'll be looking for wolfsbane and fluxweed primarily but keep your eyes open for anything else we can use. Did you bring gloves?"

"Yes sir," Freddie said, pulling her dragonhide gloves from her pocket.

"Good. Go ahead and put them on," he said, putting on his own gloves before picking up one of the baskets.

"Are there werewolves in the forest?" Freddie asked as she followed Snape into the trees.

"Not usually," he said with a small smirk. "Are you frightened?"

"No sir," she answered. "I can hold my own."

"Good. Do keep your wand ready," he cautioned. "Werewolves aren't the only thing to worry about in a forest like this."

"Yes sir."

They both lit their wand tips so they could see better. The full moon was partially obscured by the trees. Dappled rays of moonlight were scattered across the forest floor. Snape seemed to know where he was going so Freddie followed close behind him.

"Wait," she said suddenly, grabbing the back of his cloak. A black adder was coiled less than a foot away from his feet. Freddie used her wand to levitate the serpent and directed it gently away. She set the creature down several yards away. It uncoiled and slithered away into the dark, away from them.

"Why didn't you just get rid of it?" Snape asked as they continued walking.

"I did," she said simply.

"You could have killed it."

"He wasn't doing any harm," she pointed out. "We're in their habitat. Besides, it's our house mascot, I couldn't bring myself to kill him."

"But you could if you had to? If it was a danger? I don't want to get attacked by a bear or something just because you find it 'cute'."

"Of course," she scoffed.

A few yards away the trees gave way to a clearing.

"Slowly," Snape whispered as they approached the clearing. As they got closer, Freddie saw why. The clearing was filled with long-necked creatures with large eyes.

"Mooncalves," Freddie exhaled softly.

Snape nodded and held a finger to his lips. The mooncalves formed a circle around the clearing. They raised up on their hind legs and began to dance.

Freddie watched in silent fascination as the creatures danced in intricate movements. She knew from reading about them that their webbed feet left geometric patterns in the dirt that often confused Muggle farmers. She watched their strange feet move and that's when she noticed it – the clearing was full of wolfsbane plants.

When the mooncalves began to pair off, Freddie realized their dance had been a mating dance. She felt her face grow warm as she realized what she and Snape were watching together.

"I suppose it would be rude to interrupt them," she whispered jokingly.

She saw him crack a small smile in the moonlight.

"It won't be much longer," he murmured to her. Freddie looked back to the clearing and saw the males were already dismounting.

"Jeez, 5 second wonder," Freddie said and Snape let out a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

"That's inappropriate, Miss Gray," he said, his voice strained.

"Sorry," she said with a grin.

The clearing erupted suddenly as a snarling pack of wolves rushed in. The mooncalves screamed and bolted and Freddie raced into the clearing with her wand.

"Stupefy!" she shouted, hitting the closest wolf with a jet of red light that knocked him out. "Stupefy! Stupefy!"

The pack turned their attention on her as the mooncalves escaped.

"Stupefy!" she shouted, stunning another one. She felt Snape behind her as the pack advanced.

"_Lupine evanesco_!" he said with a wave of his wand and all of the wolves vanished.

"That was foolish," Snape said to her, walking out into the clearing.

"That was _rude_ – the wolves, not you, sir. Imagine getting it on and then here comes a pack of wolves, mucking things up."

Snape snorted and knelt in the clearing to harvest the wolfsbane. Freddie joined him, harvesting the plant from the other side of the clearing. Her basket was half full when she noticed another plant at the edge of the clearing.

"That's a sopophorus plant, isn't it?"

Snape walked over to her and examined it.

"Yes. Good eye. It's extremely uncommon to find sopophorus outside of a marsh," he said.

"Shall I harvest the bean pods?"

"Yes. Use these," he said, digging in his pocket and producing a small pair of scissors.

"Thanks," she said, kneeling down with her basket. Immediately a foul smell hit her nose.

"Ugh, I've knelt in dung!" she exclaimed in disgust, jumping up. The left leg of her pants was covered in dung. She pointed her wand at her pants. "Scourgify!"

"Watch where you step," Snape advised, going back to harvest the rest of the wolfsbane.

"Thanks," Freddie said, rolling her eyes. "It's mooncalf dung – should I get it for Professor Sprout?"

"You are my apprentice, not Pomona's."

"Potions and Herbology go hand in hand," she said, kneeling carefully to snip the pods from the sopophorus plant.

"Pomona will not even grow a Venomous Tentacula for me," he scoffed. "Could have saved me 80 galleons."

"Maybe they're difficult to tend," Freddie said, placing the bean pods into her basket. Snape snorted again as she got to her feet.

"I'm going to collect it anyway, if you don't mind. I'm sure she'll appreciate it."

"Suit yourself," he said. "I haven't got a shovel for you."

Freddie found a stick at the edge of the clearing and transfigured it into a shovel. She found a large rock and transformed it into a plastic pail, not wanting to ruin her plants with the unfiltered dung.

She walked around the clearing, shoveling dung into the pail while Snape finished gathering wolfsbane.

"Are you finished?" he asked her. "We need to search for fluxweed down by the river."

"Yes sir," she said, putting the last shovelful into her pail, which was almost full. "Where's the river?"

"Follow me," he said, leading the way back into the forest with his wand-light held aloft.

Freddie took the bucket in one hand, put her wand in her mouth, and picked up her basket of plants in their other hand. She hurried after Snape, her feet crunching on fallen leaves as she ran to catch up.

They walked through the forest for what felt like ages. Freddie began to regret collecting so much dung. The bucket was heavy and it smelled bad.

Finally she heard the sound of water running. They came out of the trees on the edge of a wide river. The mooncalves were on the other side, drinking. A few looked up at them then, deciding they weren't a threat, continued drinking.

Freddie put down the bucket and stretched briefly before taking her wand in hand.

"Look down close to the water," Snape said, walking along the bank of the river.

"I'll go this way," Freddie said, walking the opposite direction.

"Keep your wand out," he warned.

"Duh," she said and he furrowed his brow. "I mean, yes sir."

Freddie walked along the river, holding her wand ahead of her so she could see. She found a few bundles of fluxweed and a clump of dittany.

She continued down the bank and found more fluxweed, enough to almost fill her basket. She started back up the river in Snape's direction. She paused when the light of her wand illuminated something in the river.

"Gillyweed," she said aloud to herself. She put her basket down and squatted next to the river. She looked out over the water. She didn't see any sign of snakes or crocodiles. She took off her gloves. With her wand in one hand, she reached her left hand into the water and grabbed the gillyweed.

There was a movement in the water and quick as a flash something grabbed her. She saw the demonic face of the grindylow beneath the water. She tried to wrench herself free from its grip but couldn't. Its bony fingers gripped her tightly. Her mind worked quickly.

"_Relatio!" _she said, brandishing her wand. A jet of light hit the water and immediately turned into a boiling jet of water that burned the grindylow and scalded her hand. She jerked her hand out of the water, free of the monster's grip.

Her hand was blistered from the spell but the gillyweed was fine. She hadn't let go of it. She dropped the plant into her basket and using her wand to levitate the basket ahead of her she continued on up the river.

She met Snape close to where they'd split up. His eyes immediately went to her injured hand.

"Grindylow," she explained. "Revulsion Jinx – apparently it turns to a boiling jet underwater. But I got gillyweed – and a ton of dittany and fluxweed."

Snape's face hardened and she thought he might yell at her or call her an idiot, but he didn't.

"You need to get that looked at when we get back to the castle," he said gruffly.

"Yeah. I'm ready when you are," she said, levitating the bucket of dung next to her basket.

The pain in Freddie's hand got worse the closer they got to the castle. She tried not to show it, kept her teeth clenched, focusing on levitating the things she'd collected. She could handle pain.

When they entered the castle, Snape headed for the dungeon.

"Should I go to the Hospital Wing?" she asked hesitantly.

"You could," he said, holding open the door to the dungeon. "Or, if you don't want to wake Madam Pomfrey, I have a first aid kit in my office."

"That works. Thank you," she said gratefully.

She followed him down the stairs down to his office. She put the bucket and basket down and sat in her usual chair. Snape set his basket down in front of the ingredient cupboard, then dug around in the cabinet a moment. He pulled out a small box and came around the desk.

"Let me see," he ordered.

Freddie lifted her wounded hand and Snape took her hand gently in his. Freddie winced as he examined her hand and she let out a soft hiss when he touched the blisters. There were three long gashes left by the grindylow that oozed blood.

"I should've left my glove on," she said as he turned back to open the box. "But I didn't want to get it wet...it seemed like a good idea at the time."

Snape let out a 'hmm' and turned back with a small bottle and a jar.

"Essence of Dittany," he said, uncorking the bottle. Freddie held her hand out again and Snape took her hand in one of his. With his other hand, he poured a few drops of Dittany onto the scratches. Freddie let out another hiss as the wound stung and began to smoke. Reflexively she tried to pull her hand away but Snape held her tight.

"Be still," he snapped.

"Sorry," she murmured, then bit her lip, giving her some other pain to focus on.

Snape set the vial aside and picked up the jar. Freddie held her hand out limply. Snape coated his hands with the salve then began to spread it over her blistered hand.

The cool balm soothed her wounds almost instantly. She focused on the feeling of Snape's soft hands caressing hers and she felt a warmth spread through her. When he finished he pulled out his wand and tapped her hand. Bandages emerged from the tip of his wand and wrapped themselves snugly around Freddie's hand.

"Thank you," she said softly. He nodded and put the kit away.

"Are you able to put the ingredients away?" he asked, tapping the bookcase to reveal the Brewing Room. He entered the room and Freddie heard the water running in the sink as he washed his hands.

"Of course," she said, picking up her basket and taking it over to the cupboard.

"Leave those here," he instructed. "Take mine and go put them in the Potions classroom."

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

"After that you can go to bed. It's late and I expect to see you in class in the morning."

"Of course, sir. What about the mooncalf droppings for Professor Sprout?"

"As much as I _don't _want my office to smell like dung," he said with a sneer. "I will give it to Pomona at breakfast."

"Thank you," she said, picking up his basket in her uninjured hand. "Goodnight Professor Snape."

"Goodnight, Miss Gray. See you in the morning."

Freddie stopped by the Potions classroom on her way to her form. She pushed the door open to find the classroom dark and even spookier than usual. Freddie lit the torches with a flick of her wand and looked at the classroom. Empty desks, empty cauldrons.

She smiled slightly, recalling her very first Potions class. She'd had a difficult time in other classes, learning how to control her magic. She'd spent most of her childhood before Hogwarts trying to learn to control her outbursts without ever being allowed a wand. Once she had one she vowed to devote every minute to learning to control it.

But when Snape had entered the classroom, his black robes billowing behind him, he'd told them to put their wands away. His voice had been entrancing to her, even then. She'd hung on his every word as he explained how this wasn't a class for foolish wand waving or incantations.

_"I don't expect any of you to truly understand the beauty that is the art of potion-making. The softly simmering cauldron with shimmering fumes. The delicate power of liquids that can creep through veins, ensnaring the senses, bewitching the mind...even destroying it completely. Potions so strong that even the most brilliant of men can be reduced to nothing with a single drop."_

The words had sent a chill through Freddie then as they did now as she recalled them. As she put away the wolfsbane and other ingredients Snape had collected. Freddie remembered how excited she'd felt that first class. To find something that didn't require her to use her magic, something she could focus her mind on more easily. She had been fascinated the way her first potion had developed, how each added ingredient changed the characteristics of the liquid brew.

Snape had criticized her a few times – she'd sliced her foxglove too early and had to get a new batch. She wasn't grinding hard enough with her mortar. _"With the strength of a dying pixie." _His words had infuriated her but rather than last out with uncontrolled magic she was able to focus on her work. She'd redoubled her efforts and kept her concentration on her work – until a Bouncing Bulb smacked her in the face.

"Watch it," she'd hissed to the boy sitting next to her.

"Sorry," said the curly-haired Ravenclaw beside her. "I can't keep this damn thing still to be able to squash it."

Freddie glanced around to see Snape berating a Ravenclaw girl whose potion was bright yellow.

"Squash it at the base of the bulb, not the stem," she muttered to him as she finished grinding her own bulb.

"Oh – hey, thanks," the boy said as he triumphantly crushed his bulb.

"Whatever," she said, dumping the bulb into her potion, then stirring it anti-clockwise until it turned a magnificent shade of red.

"My name is Daniel," he said as she turned back to re-slice her foxglove. "Daniel Byrd."

"Freddie," she said, carefully slicing the plant. "Last name's Gray."

At the end of her first class, Freddie was one of the only ones whose potion was the correct shade of orange.

"Acceptable," Snape had said, lifting a ladle full to sniff it. "But the only way to be sure is to test it."

His eyes fell upon Daniel whose face paled and he pushed his chair back anxiously.

"Drink it," Snape said, offering him the ladle.

"Uh, I, uh," Daniel stammered.

"It's not gonna kill you," Freddie said bracingly. Daniel gave her a quick, nervous smile, then drank the potion.

The rest of the class erupted with laughter as Daniel's head turned into a pumpkin. Freddie hadn't laughed but had smiled triumphantly as Snape awarded 10 points to Slytherin.

Freddie finished putting the ingredients away and closed the cupboard. She smiled back at the empty classroom before crossing the room. She extinguished the torches with a flick of her wand before heading to bed.


	13. Chapter 13

Freddie woke up a little late the next morning, but not too late. She dressed quickly and headed to the Great Hall for a hurried breakfast. She didn't see Daniel at the Ravenclaw table or anywhere at the Gryffindor table. She told herself she didn't care and shoved one last biscuit in her mouth as the bell rang.

She felt almost bored during Potions class as they brewed a Wound-Cleansing Potion, something she felt like she could do in her sleep. She'd brewed it at least a dozen times before at home, practicing for her career at St Mungos.

_You can't be bored with this, this is what you're going to do for the rest of your life, _she told herself. _Healing Potions, Wound-Cleansing Potions, Blood-Replenishing Potions..._

Snape tapped one finger on her desk, drawing her attention. She followed the long, pale finger up his arm to his expressionless face.

"See me after class," he said quietly.

Freddie nodded and watched him walk away before turning her focus back to her potion.

When the bell rang a while later, Freddie put her things away. She slung her bag over her shoulder and lingered at the front of the classroom until the others were gone.

"There was nothing wrong with my potion," she said, leaning against his desk ready to argue with any fault he had perceived.

"No, there was not,:" he said, looking up at her with some unreadable expression in his dark eyes. "You have a study period after Transfiguration, correct?"

"Uh- yeah. Yes, sir."

"Are you caught up on your homework?"

"Yes sir – although McGonagall will likely pile more on."

"There is a book and a cauldron for you in my Brewing Room. Head there after your Transfiguration class and begin work on your Felix Felicis – unless you have something better to do?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.

"No sir! Thank you," she said happily.

"Get to class," he said, nodding to her.

"Yes sir."

Freddie met Daniel on the stairs up to McGonagall's class.

"Hey," he said, grinning at her. "How was the ingredient gathering by moonlight?"

"Oh it was cool! We saw Mooncalves doing their mating dance."

"Oh, that's so cool! I wish I could've seen that. I've always wanted to see one – they only come out of their dens on the full moon."

"Yeah. Maybe next full moon we could sneak out, go find them?"

"Yeah? I've been practicing my Disillusionment Charm, I think I've got it done. I bet I can get us out of the castle undetected."

"I'm down," she said as they entered the classroom together. "So...how'd it go yesterday? The Gryffindor girl?"

"She's great, isn't she?" he asked, grinning again.

"She's...pretty," she said awkwardly.

"Her name is Heather Ross. And get this – she asked me out! She wants me to go to the carnival in Hogsmeade with her weekend after next."

"Oh. I thought – well, that's cool. That's great, actually. Congratulations."

"Thanks."

#

Freddie couldn't wait to get out of Transfiguration. She had a potion waiting for her, a cool, complicated potion. She didn't want to sit in Transfiguration and listen to Daniel talk about his girlfriend while they worked.

10 minutes before the bell was due to ring, Freddie waved down Professor McGonagall. She pulled out her old pass and told McGonagall she had to work on something for Professor Snape.

"Very well, Miss Gray. You have your homework written down?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Then you may go."

She gathered her things and hurried out of the room, waving to Daniel who looked confused. She hurried down the stairs, heading for the dungeons, but was surprised to meet Albus Dumbledore in the entrance hall.

"Miss Gray," he greeted, smiling at her. "Shouldn't you be in class?"

"Uh, hi, Professor Dumbledore. Um, yes, sir, well I have a potion I'm working on – well, I'm about to start it, I have a free period next so..."

"So you ducked out of Transfiguration early?" he asked with a knowing smile.

_How does he know my schedule? _She thought.

"A- a bit early, sir," she admitted.

"I was pleasantly surprised when Professor Snape requested to take you on as his apprentice. He is extremely critical of his students."

"Yes sir," she said. "Although that might be an understatement."

Dumbledore chuckled lightly.

"Well there's no denying you must be exceptionally talented. Severus does not allow many people to get close to him."

"Sir?" she asked, confused.

"How are you doing in your other classes, Miss Gray? Are you enjoying them?"

"Y-yes sir. I'm doing well in all of my classes. We're learning about Occamys in Care of Magical Creatures. McGonagall is teaching us conjuring spells."

"How's the homework treating you? I know 6th year can be overwhelming for some."

"Oh it's a breeze, sir. A really _strong _breeze," she joked. "But I'm keeping my head above the water."

"What happened to your hand?" he inquired.

"Oh it was an accident," she said, glancing down at her bandaged hand. "Grindylow – my own fault, really. Professor Snape patched me up alright."

"Good, good. Well, carry on, Miss Gray. Enjoy the rest of your day."

"Thank you sir," she said, quickly slipping off into the dungeons.

She was halfway to Snape's office when the bell rang and a swarm of terrified-looking first years poured out of the Potions classroom. Freddie stood against the wall to let them pass.

"Miss Gray."

Freddie looked up to see Snape standing in the doorway of the classroom. He did a little come-here motion with his finger and she crossed the hall.

"You left Transfiguration early?" he asked disapprovingly.

"Just a little bit. I wanted to get started on my potion," she said sheepishly.

"I assume you used the pass I gave you?"

"Yes sir," she said, looking down at the floor.

"Do not do that again without my permission," he said in a dangerous tone. "Detention. My office. 7 o'clock."

"Yes sir," she said with a sigh. He nodded to her and she continued on her way.

"Freaking Dumbledore," she muttered to herself.

"What did you say?" Snape asked.

"Uh," Freddie hesitated, then decided it wasn't worth lying about. "Professor Dumbledore. He stopped to talk to me in the Entrance Hall. Otherwise you never would have seen me and I'd already be started on my potion."

"What did he say to you? Dumbledore?"

"Asked me about my classes and crap," she said with a shrug. "Told me I was lucky you took me on as an apprentice."

"You are," he said. "Carry on, Miss Gray."


	14. Chapter 14

Freddie dove headfirst into brewing the potion as soon as she reached the Brewing Room. She focused on her work, forgetting about everything else. She didn't even hear the lunch bell ring and was surprised when Snape appeared in the doorway.

"You've been busy," he commented, leaning against the door frame.

"What?" Freddie looked up from her cauldron, her hair in a sloppy ponytail. She'd shed her outer robes and sweater to work more comfortably in the small, warm room, leaving her in her schoolgirl skirt and white shirt. "What are you doing here?"

"It's my office," he reminded her. "And it's lunch time. You should go eat before your Charms class."

"Ugh. Can't I just stay here? I was thinking maybe I could set up another cauldron, get started on the Polyjuice, see how well I can manage two things at once."

She didn't want to go to lunch and she damn sure didn't want to go to Charms. She didn't want to see Daniel or worse Daniel and Heather. Not when she could be doing _this_.

"Go," Snape said, waving his wand to place a stasis spell on her cauldron. "Eat. And don't forget you have detention this evening."

"Sometimes I hate you," Freddie sighed, pulling her robes back on.

"I don't need you to like me. I just need you to do as I say and _try _not to be an idiot."

Freddie scoffed and gathered her things.

"I do though. Most of the time," she said, brushing past him into the office.

"Listen to me or like me?" he asked sardonically, following her out.

"Both," she said simply, looking back at him with a smile.

"_This _is why I had to give you detention," he said, walking out after her into the hallway.

"Because I might like you?" she asked, smiling at him.

"No, because I do not do 'favoritism' among students. Slipping out on class is wrong and you deserve to be punished."

"I don't disagree with that. I only wish I hadn't gotten caught," she muttered, thinking to herself that she'd be sneakier next time. "Are you following me?"

"No," he scoffed. "I am going to eat lunch, same as you. I missed breakfast this morning."

"Ah, so _that's _what's wrong with you. You're always in an extra bad mood when you skip breakfast."

"I-" he paused a moment on the stairs before continuing. "You are not wrong."

"That's why you have me detention."

"That is _not _why-"

"Breakfast is the most important meal of the day," she quipped as they entered the Great Hall together.

"Go eat with your friend," he said irritably, his eyes scanning the Ravenclaw table. "And where is Mr Byrd?"

Freddie jerked her thumb at the Gryffindor table where she couldn't _not _see Daniel with his arm around Heather.

"See you in detention," she muttered, going to sit with her classmates at the Slytherin Table.

Freddie finished lunch and headed to Charms class. Daniel caught up with her on the stairs, having kissed Heather's cheek before they parted ways.

"I thought you were done with the Wolfsbane?" he asked. "Why'd you leave Transfiguration early?"

"We're working on something else now – well, I am. Snape's gonna let me brew complicated potions on my own, to test my abilities."

"Like what?" he asked, intrigued.

"Felix Felicis."

"Who's that?"

"It's a potion, dummy, not a person."

"Never heard of it."

"That's cause you failed your OWLs."

"I didn't fail," he protested. "I just didn't get Outstanding like you, Potions Princess."

Freddie smiled smugly.

"Felix Felicis is known as the lucky potion. 'Liquid luck'. Anyone who drinks it will be successful at anything they attempt. It's illegal to use it for any organized competitive events."

"Oh man, you've _got _to hook me up with some of that!" he said eagerly.

"It takes 6 months to brew, it's even more complicated than the Wolfsbane I think. Besides," she said with a smirk. "Seems to me you don't need a potion to 'get lucky'."

His ears turned red and Freddie laughed.

"It's still new, ya know, we haven't _done_ anything yet," he whispered. "She's my first real girlfriend. We haven't even kissed yet! I mean not _really_ not like with tongue."

"Spare me the details," she said dryly.

"You sound like Snape," he teased. "Besides, you're my best friend. Who else am I supposed to talk to?"

"One of your guy friends? Geck? Perkins?" she suggested.

"I can't talk to those guys, they'll take the mickey out of me! Besides, Heather's important. You're the one I talk to about important stuff," he said earnestly.

"But I don't wanna listen to you talk about snogging – ugh," she said, shaking her head.

"I've listened to you fawn over Snape," he whispered. "For at _least _the last three years."

"I do not _fawn_ over anyone, Daniel Byrd," she huffed. "I'm not some doe-eyed first year."

"Alright, fine. But when you and him start snogging in broom cupboards, you're gonna want to talk to me about it."

"That has about as much chance of happening as the Chudley Cannons do of winning this years Quidditch League," she snorted. "Besides – he gave me detention."

"What? For what?"

"I wasn't exactly supposed to leave McGonagall's class this morning. He found me out."

"What a tosser!" he declared and Freddie laughed as they entered Flitwick's classroom and sat down together.

#

Freddie had another free period after Charms and she was happy to return to her potion. She stopped by her dorm and changed first, donning a pair of blue jeans and a thin black sweater that wouldn't be too hot and let her move more freely.

She took her books with her down to Snape's office so she could do her homework if she got the chance. She found the Felix Felicis exactly as she'd left it. She removed the stasis spell Snape had placed and resumed her work.

As she worked, she wondered again how difficult it might be to brew two potions at once. Snape hadn't exactly said no to the idea. As her potion brewed, Freddie picked up the book Snape had left for her – Moste Potente Potions – which contained the recipe for the Felix Felicis. She flipped through it until she found the Polyjuice Potion and read over the recipe carefully.

She shook her head. It would be too difficult to start it right now. At this point the Felix Felicis required too much of her focus for her to start the Polyjuice.

"Maybe next week, when it has to simmer for three days," she said aloud to herself. "Maybe something less complicated to start with..."

Freddie sat on a stool and flipped through the book, keeping a close eye on her cauldron as she did. She scanned the recipes of at least a dozen complex brews before coming across the Noxious Potion. It was a straightforward potion that would knock out anyone who smelled it for at least 5 minutes. It took 24 hours to brew and the most complicated part was not getting knocked out by the fumes when it was complete.

Freddie tended to her Felix Felicis first, grinding occamy eggshells and adding them to the brew. She stirred it a few times then increased the flames beneath the cauldron with her wand.

She rolled up her sleeves and dragged a second pewter cauldron next to the Felix Felicis and set it up. She gathered the ingredients she would need to start with and began to prepare them.

#

Freddie was humming to herself, flitting between the two cauldrons, adding ingredients, stirring both brews periodically when she heard the door to Snape's office open.

"Hey there," she said brightly as Snape entered the room. She went to her workstation and rapidly chopped some murtlap tentacles, then quickly added them to the Felix Felicis.

"You cannot keep skipping meals and hiding out in the dungeon all day to avoid your friend," Snape said, watching her work.

"I'm not avoiding anything," she said, mildly annoyed. "I'm going to dinner as soon as I reach a stopping point."

"Dinner is nearly over. It's almost 7 o'clock."

"No, that can't be right," Freddie said and checked her watch. She gasped. "I must have been absorbed in my work."

"Hm. Noelle," Snape said loudly.

Freddie opened her mouth in confusion but before she could ask there was a crack and a house elf wearing a pink towel fashioned into a dress appeared. She had large, bright blue eyes that reminded Freddie of a mooncalf.

"Yes Master Snape?" the elf asked, hands clasped behind her back.

"Miss Gray missed dinner, Noelle, can you bring her something from the kitchens?"

"Oh yes sir, Master Snape," the elf said, her ears flapping excitedly. She disappeared with a crack.

"Finish your work so you can eat and serve your detention," Snape said sternly.

"Yes sir," she said obediently. "Can you hand me the-"

She looked up but Snape was gone, back out into his office. Freddie grabbed the angelica and added it to the Felix Felicis. She re-checked the recipes for both potions before nodding to herself. She placed a stasis spell on both cauldrons and cleaned up a bit before stepping out into Snape's office.

He was sitting at his desk, grading papers. Freddie sat in her chair across from him just in time for Noelle to reappear with a large plate of food.

"Is this acceptable, Miss Gray?" Noelle asked, placing the plate on the desk in front of her.

"Yes, that's more than I could possibly eat. Thank you – Noelle, was it?"

"Yes Miss. Would you like pumpkin juice or tea? Whatever you is wanting."

"Tea, please."

"I will take a cup also, Noelle," Snape said, without looking up.

"Yes, Master Snape."

Noelle snapped her fingers and a plate appeared with a pot of steaming tea and two cups.

"Cream and sugars, Mistress Gray?" Noelle asked.

"Yes please."

Noelle snapped again and a pitcher of cream and a bowl of sugar appeared on the tray. Freddie started to fix her tea. The elf poured a cup for Snape and handed it to him.

"That will be all," Snape said, taking the cup.

"Yes, Master Snape."

"Thank you," Freddie said quickly, right as the elf disappeared. She spooned sugar into her tea and looked at Snape. "Would it kill you to be nice?"

"What?" he asked irritably. "I got you dinner. I could have let you go to bed hungry."

"Not to me – although that would be nice, too. To Noelle."

"It's a house elf," he said, sipping his tea.

"She's a living creature. You could say 'thank you'. You won't drop dead."

"You might, if you keep over-sugaring that tea," he said, reaching out and taking the spoon from her.

"What? I like sugar in my tea," she protested.

"It's more sugar than tea at this point," he scoffed.

Freddie shrugged and added milk to her tea.

"What am I doing for my detention?" she asked, cutting up one of the pork chops that Noelle had brought.

"You are going through the ingredient cupboards and sorting out the expired and unusable ingredients and disposing of them."

"That's it?" she asked through a mouthful of pork chop and potatoes. He gave her a withering look.

"Here and in the Potions classroom."

Freddie finished chewing and swallowed before speaking.

"That's fine," she said with a shrug. "I would've done that without it being a punishment."

"I could have you write lines instead," he said coolly.

"No, please, _anything _but that," she said dramatically.

She saw Snape crack the briefest of smiles and she let out a 'ha!' before digging back into her meal.

"You are a very difficult person, Miss Gray," he said before taking a sip of his tea.

"I'm a joy to teach and you like me," she said, shoveling a spoonful of potatoes into her mouth.

"Pushing it, Miss Gray," he warned.

"Mm. What are you doing? More first year essays?"

"Third year essays on antidotes to common poisons," he answered. "It's giving me a headache."

"I could help," she offered.

"You can help by finishing your dinner and your detention."

"Yes sir," she said with just a hint of a mocking tone.

She finished her meal quickly and Snape summoned Noelle to clear the leftovers and dishes away.

"Shall I start here or in the Potions classroom?" Freddie asked.

"Whatever suits you," he said indifferently.

"You're not going to supervise me? Make sure I do it right?"

"You will do it," he said simply. "You know there will be repercussions if you do not."

Freddie nodded and headed down to the Potions classroom, her imagination running wild with the possibility of what 'repercussions' disobeying Snape might hold in store for her. She wasn't paying attention and bumped into Maggie and Christine in the hallway.

"Sorry," Maggie said. "Hey Freddie, where are you off to?"

"Potions classroom. I'm serving a detention for Professor Snape."

"You?" Christine asked in disbelief.

"What did you do?" Maggie asked.

"Yeah you're Potions Princess!"

"Not today," Freddie said. "Today I'm the Potions scut monkey."

"Seriously, what did you do?" Maggie asked.

"I skipped a class and he found out," she said with a shrug. "It's no big deal. I'm cleaning out the ingredients cabinet."

"Better you than me. Later Freddie," Maggie said.

"Later."

**Author's Note: Happy New Year everyone - especially Tinkerbell, my favorite reader cuz shes the only one who reviews! lol Seriously I dont know who you are but you're my new favorite person, your reviews really boost my mood! Thank you! And thank you to the readers who read but don't review - but you'd be alot cooler if you did. 😎**


	15. Chapter 15

Freddie spent the next hour alone in the Potions classroom, picking unusable ingredients from the supply cupboard. It was tedious work and she found herself wishing she had Daniel's record player. No doubt music would make the time go faster. She tried to sing to pass the time but she couldn't remember all the lyrics so she hummed the parts she didn't know.

When she finished in the classroom she returned to Snape's office. She opened the door to find him exactly as she'd left him, grading papers.

"It is impolite not to knock," he said sourly, not looking up from his work.

"You knew I was coming back," she pointed out. "But sorry. I'll remember next time."

He grunted in acknowledgment. Freddie rolled her eyes and went to his private stores to sort ingredients.

Snape's closet was more organized than the supply cupboard in the classroom. Freddie found it easy to locate the expired ingredients. There were very few of them.

"Stop humming," Snape said, appearing behind her and startling her so that she dropped the bottle she'd been checking the label on.

"Sorry," she said, whipping out her wand to repair it. "You startled me."

"I can hear your _infernal humming _all the way in my office," he snapped. "Stop it at once."

"Yes sir," she said, surprised at his tone though she shouldn't have been. "Sorry."

Snape turned on his heel and went back to his office.

_Grumpy git, _she thought to herself. _The essays must be getting to him. He did say he had a headache. _

Freddie finished cleaning out the storage closet, then searched the alphabetized vials of potions. She selected one and left the closet. She peeked at her potions to ensure they were stable before walking out into his office.

She placed the vial next to Snape's hand on his desk and he looked up at her.

"What's this?" he asked.

"For your headache, sir," she answered. "May I help you with your essays?"

"Don't you want to go work on your potions?" he sneered.

Freddie shook her head.

"No, sir. I'd like to help you – if I can," she said softly.

Snape grunted and split the remaining papers with her. There weren't many left. Freddie picked up one of the papers to read and smiled to herself when she saw Snape pick up the Headache Potion and drink it.

Together they finished grading the essays then Freddie went back to tend to her potions before bed. Snape followed her and sat on the stood, watching her as she worked.

"You can cut the brewing time in half on your Noxious Potion if you add a teaspoon of Fire Seed and add more heat to the cauldron," he said in his usual bored-sounding voice.

Freddie hurriedly scribbled his advice in the margins of the book, then gasped.

"Oh my god, this isn't even my book! It's yours. I'm so sorry," she said quickly, pulling out her wand to erase it.

"Don't. It's fine. You can have it," he said indifferently.

"No...are you sure?" she asked.

"Knock yourself out," he said, getting up off the stool and going to the supply closet. He returned with the vial of fire seed and handed it to her.

"Thank you," she said, quickly measuring out a teaspoonful and adding it to her cauldron. She stoked the flames with her wand then turned back to him. "I think that's it for tonight...would it be okay if I came by in the morning before breakfast to check on them?"

"That is fine," Snape said, following her out into his office.

Freddie glanced at the stack of completed papers on his desk and smiled.

"You know," she said, turning to look at him. "If you didn't assign so much homework, you wouldn't have so much grading to do."

"That may be true," he said slowly. "But if I don't assign homework, the idiots will never learn."

"One could argue that some of them will never learn, no matter how many essays you assign," she joked, hoping for a smile. The corners of his mouth twitched slightly, but he didn't smile.

"Goodnight, Miss Gray."

"Goodnight Professor."

#

Before the sun had risen the next morning, Freddie was up and dressed. She was eager to see how her Noxious Potion had turned out. She didn't doubt that Snape's suggestions had worked but she was still excited. It was the first complex potion she had brewed completely by herself, outside of the classroom. She'd done simple brews herself at home over the summer, but nothing like this.

The Common Room was completely deserted as she walked through it. Everyone was still asleep. The castle seemed eerily quiet as she made her way to Snape's office. She knocked on the door but received no answer.

_Good, he's not here yet_, she thought, pulling out her wand to lift the enchantment that sealed the door. She lit a fire in the hearth as she entered the deserted office. She tapped the bookcase to reveal the Brewing Room and was immediately hit with the smell of sulfur.

She held her breath and cast a bubble around the cauldron containing the Noxious Potion. The smell and the green smoke coming from the brew indicated her efforts had been successful. She made quick work of bottling it before the toxic fumes could knock her out. She slipped a small vial into her pocket, grinning to herself, then set about cleaning the cauldron.

She heard a cough and whirled around to find Snape standing in the doorway. But this was Snape as she'd never seen him. He wore long flannel pajama pants with a green plaid pattern, a black t-shirt, and no shoes, looking for all intents and purposes as if he'd just rolled out of bed.

"It stinks in here," he said, sounding not-quite-awake yet.

"Professor! W-where did you come from?"

"My living quarters," he said, gesturing behind him.

Freddie looked past him and saw the bookcase adjacent to the Brewing Room was open to reveal a dimly lit room she hadn't known existed. She couldn't see much but a candle on a table and the edge of what may have been a couch.

"I'm sorry sir! I didn't know – you said I could come before breakfast, I..."

Snape squinted at her and rubbed a hand over his face.

"It is very early, Miss Gray."

"Yes sir. I can go-"

"Just...keep the noise to a dull roar," he said and Freddie was left staring as he crossed the room and the bookcase shut behind him.

Freddie sat down on a stood and let out a shaky breath, trying to process what she'd just seen. Snape in his pajamas. Snape looking sleepy and soft. _And incredibly sexy, _she thought, her heart racing. _Merlin's beard. _

She felt bad for waking him up but it was difficult to regret, all things considered. She thought about leaving, going back to her dorm, but in the end she decided to stay and work. After all, he hadn't seemed angry at her presence. He hadn't told her to leave, just to be quiet.

Freddie continued working on the Felix Felicis and after a while Snape re-emerged from his quarters, dressed this time, with a cup of tea in hand.

"It smells like rotten eggs in my office, Winifred," he said, sitting at his desk with his tea. She prickled briefly at the use of her first name but she found it difficult to be mad at him at the moment.

"Well it's called Noxious Potion not Smell-Good Potion," she responded from the Brewing Room.

She heard Snape mutter something about brewing Amortentia and looked out to see him raise his wand.

"_Nova caeli_," he said and immediately the smell vanished, leaving a clean scent in the dungeon rooms.

"Thanks, I couldn't quite figure that one out," Freddie admitted.

She continued working but she could feel Snape watching her through the open door.

"Would you like a cup of tea, Miss Gray?" he asked finally.

"Oh – yes, please. Thank you."

"Only if I don't have to watch you over-sugar it."

"You could close your eyes?" she suggested teasingly as she joined him in his office.

Snape called for Noelle who immediately summoned a cup of tea, with cream and sugar for Freddie.

"That will be all, Noelle. Thank you," Snape said, looking pointedly at Freddie, who smiled.

"You is very welcomed, Master Snape," Noelle said, her blue eyes sparkling before she disappeared with a crack.

"My uncle has a house elf at home," Freddie said as she fixed her tea. "His name is Anuris. Uncle treats him like dirt but I've found he's much more pleasant to deal with and helpful when I treat him with a shred of common decency."

"Hmm," Snape said, sipping his tea.

"What's the old saying? Catch more flies with honey than vinegar?"

"Flies are annoying – not unlike yourself," Snape said coolly.

Freddie made a face and stuck her tongue out at him.

"Childish," he snorted.

"I think I'll go back to my potion," she said, getting up and carrying her tea into the Brewing Room. She prepared a few ingredients she would need for her potion throughout the day, sipping her tea while she worked. It was a good, strong tea and tasted different than the tea usually provided in the Great Hall. She assumed it was something Noelle prepared specially for Snape.

"Have you given much thought to which potion you will attempt next?" Snape asked casually from the next room.

"I want to do Polyjuice," she said. "But I think I won't start until next week, when the Felix Felicis won't take so much of my attention."

"A wise decision."

"Maybe another one with a short brewing time, like the Noxious Potion. I was going to look through the book later today."

"I will choose something for you," he said dismissively. "You should go to breakfast now."

"So should you," she pointed out.

"I am," he said, standing up from his desk.

They walked up to the Great Hall together. When Freddie saw Daniel sitting at the Ravenclaw Table she made a beeline for him.

"Hey loser," she said jovially as he made room for her to sit. "Where's your girlfriend?"

"Sleeping in, I reckon. We had a bit of a late night," he said with a grin.

"Ew," she said, pulling a plate of bacon towards her.

"We were studying," he said, rolling his eyes. "Lighten up, Fred."

"Right," she said, munching on bacon. "I didn't have a late night but I did have an early morning."

"With your Felix thing?"

"Who's Felix?" Geck asked, leaning across the table. "Is he in our year?"

"It's a potion, not a person, nosy bugger," Freddie said, tossing a bit of bacon at him. "There's something else though."

"What?" Daniel asked. She leaned close to whisper in his ear.

"I saw Snape in his Pjs," she said with a devilish grin.

"Really?" he asked loudly.

"Shh," she hissed at him, still grinning.

"I can't even imagine – no, I don't _want _to imagine that," he said, then chuckled. "Except now I'm picturing red footie pajamas. Ya know, the kind with the butt flap."

"There was no butt flap!" she exclaimed, smacking him. "I'll tell you more about it when we head to Herbology."

"You two are all whispers and secrets," Geck said, rolling his eyes at them from across the table. "No fun at all."

"We can be fun," Freddie said, rummaging around in her pocket and pulling out the vial from earlier. "Hey Daniel, smell this."

"What is it?" he asked warily.

"A perfume for your girlfriend," she lied smoothly.

Daniel took the vial, uncorked it, and took a big sniff – and passed out headfirst into his stack of pancakes.

Freddie cackled and Geck and a few other Ravenclaws joined in. But then there was a shriek and Freddie saw Heather running across the hall.

"She's poisoned him!" Heather screamed and suddenly there were teachers and students swarming around them.

"No he's fine!" Freddie insisted. "It was just a prank – he'll come around in a few minutes."

"He needs to go to the Hospital Wing," Heather said. "Professor McGonagall, she's poisoned him, I saw her!"

"No, it was a prank-" Freddie tried to explain but no one was listening to her. People were crowding around Daniel and two older boys picked him up. Freddie tried to stop them but someone grabbed her arm forcefully. She looked up to see a very angry Snape dragging her from the Great Hall.

"Let go of me- I didn't hurt him, he's fine-"

"Not here," Snape hissed, dragging her down the stairs into the dungeons. His classroom was closest and he pushed her ahead of him into the room, slamming the door behind him.

"What the _hell _were you thinking, Gray?" he demanded, his face inches from hers in the dark classroom.

"I didn't do anything wrong!" she exclaimed. "It was just a prank, when Daniel wakes up he'll tell you!"

"You _never_, I repeat _never_, use one of your potions against a fellow student!" he snarled. He was so close she could feel his hot breath on her face.

"It was a _joke_. I didn't poison him, it was just a whiff of Noxious Potion."

"I don't care if it was a _Babbling Beverage_," he snapped. "Using one of our potions against a student is a sure way to _end _your apprenticeship _permanently_. You may even get suspended."

Much to her alarm, Freddie felt tears well up in her eyes. She tried to blink them back quickly.

"It was just a joke," she said miserably, hating the way her voice cracked. "I'm sorry."

Snape stared at her a long moment. She could see his nostrils flare as he exhaled slowly. Freddie found she was trembling and she hated herself for it. She wasn't the sort of person who cried and she especially didn't want Snape to see the weakness in her. She wanted nothing more than to run away and hide.

The bell rang loudly and Snape straightened up.

"Go to class," he ordered. "I expect Professor Dumbledore will want to speak with you later."

Freddie didn't need to be told twice. She fled the classroom and made her way to the nearest bathroom. She locked herself in a stall and sat there, her hands balled into fists on her lap as she tried to calm down. She heard the sound of shattering glass and looked out to see she'd broken a mirror.

"You've got to calm down," she whispered to herself, thankful there was no one else in the lavatory. "It was just a joke. Daniel will tell them that and it'll be fine...except that Snape is pissed at me."

She'd never seen Snape so angry before and to know it was directed her made her feel beyond miserable. All of the faucets turned on and Freddie had to manually turn them off.

"Pull it together, Fred. Control yourself. Control your magic. Get to Herbology before you're late."

She took a deep breath to steady herself and left the bathroom.

_It would've been fine if that stupid Gryffindor Mudblood hadn't freaked out, _she thought, her emotions shifting quickly to anger. The torches along the dungeon corridor flared with her anger and she took another deep breath.

_Calm. Focus_, she told herself, leaving the dungeons.

As she headed for the Greenhouses she repeated the steps for a Simple Sleeping Draught in her mind to try and distract herself and stay calm.

_Mix four sprigs of lavender and 2 measures of standard mixed herbs in the mortar. Crush them to a creamy paste using the pestle. _

"Hey Freddie!" Geck called, spotting her across the lawn.

_Add 2 blobs of flobberworm mucus into a Standard Size 2 pewter cauldron. Add 2 measures of standard mixed herbs to the cauldron. Gently heat for 30 seconds. _

"McGonagall took Daniel to the Hospital Wing," Geck said, panting as he caught up with her. "I told her it was a prank. You two are always at it like that."

Freddie walked quicker, trying to focus and stay calm.

_Focus. Flobberworm mucus. Standard herbs. Gently heat for 30 seconds. Add 3 measures of the crushed mixture. Brew for 70 minutes. Add-_

"He was coming around before the bell rang," Geck continued. "He'll get it straight, you know him. He won't be mad."

_ Add 2 measures of standard herbs. Increase heat for 60 seconds. Add 4 valerian sprigs. Stir-_

"You won't get in trouble," Geck said bracingly.

"I'm already in trouble, you daft troll!" she snarled and a bolt of lightning cracked across the sky. Unsure if it was her or the weather, Freddie went back to her mantra.

_Brew 70 minutes – no, valerian sprigs. Stir clockwise, 7 times. Potion complete. _

"Hey," Geck said, sounding hurt. "I thought it was funny, Freddie, loads of us did. Heather just over-reacted she doesn't know-"

"Over-reacted?! She may have gotten me _expelled_!"

Thunder rumbled and the sky darkened.

_Start with 4 sprigs of lavender and 2 measures of standard herbs. Crush to paste. Flobberworm mucus. _

"No way – it's gonna be fine," Geck insisted.

"Just shut _up_, Nathan Gecker, and _leave me alone_!"

The rain began to fall. Geck gave her a disgusted look and took off.

_Flobberworm mucus. 2 measures of standard herbs. Gently heat for 30 seconds. _

Freddie entered Greenhouse 3, where they'd been caring for fanged geranium seedlings since the previous week. Conversations stopped and all eyes were on her. Professor Sprout had not yet arrived.

Freddie said nothing but walked to the end of the work table, repeating the steps of the potion in her head over and over and over again until she felt a sort of calmness come over her.

Professor Sprout arrived and began the lesson. Freddie tended to her geranium in a sort of trance. She tried to listen to Sprout's lecture but she was finding it difficult to focus. She was going to be expelled, her life was over, her career, everything...

_Where's Daniel? _She wondered, absently stroking the petals of her geranium, causing it to purr pleasantly. _He should be back by now. What if he's not okay? What if I screwed something up?_

The door opened and several people gasped. Freddie looked up from her flower to see Albus Dumbledore standing in the doorway. She froze.

_He's here to kick me out_, she thought, panicked. _This is it. I'm going to be expelled. He's going to yell at me. I've never seen the headmaster mad before..._

"Good morning, Professor Sprout," Dumbledore said pleasantly.

"Headmaster," Sprout said, surprised. "What brings you here on this fine morning?"

"I need to borrow one of your students – Miss Gray?"

All eyes were on her again. Freddie felt frozen to the spot. She didn't hear her geranium growl but when it bit down on her finger, she jumped. She grabbed her bag and walked slowly to the front of the greenhouse, repeating potion steps in her head again.

Dumbledore smiled kindly at her as she approached and Freddie took a deep breath. She followed him out of the greenhouse and let out her breath all at once when she saw Daniel standing there, unharmed.

"Miss Gray," Dumbledore began. "Regarding the incident in the Great Hall this morning-"

"I told him it was a prank, Freddie, I'm totally fine," Daniel said insistently.

"Is that true, Miss Gray?" Dumbledore asked.

"Yes sir," Freddie said quietly, looking down at the wet grass. The rain had stopped. "It was a stupid prank, I just...it will never happen again."

"I don't discourage joking or even a few well-natured pranks between friends. I do believe that this is something that simply got out of hand."

"Yes sir. I'm sorry, Headmaster. It will never happen again," Freddie promised sullenly.

She wanted to ask about Snape, about her apprenticeship, but she couldn't bring herself to ask.

"Good. Now, Miss Gray, Mr Byrd, I believe you have fanged geraniums waiting on you and a day full of knowledge ahead. Go and enjoy the rest of your day," he said grandly.

"Thank you, Professor," Daniel said as Dumbledore walked away.

"Thank you," Freddie repeated numbly. She turned to go back into the greenhouse.

"Hey Freddie-" Daniel began.

"We have a class," she said flatly and went back inside.

#


	16. Chapter 16

Freddie finished Herbology without speaking to Daniel or anyone else. She was dreading her next class, dreading Potions for the first time in her life. When the bell rang she left the greenhouse, not waiting for Daniel. He came after her anyway.

"Hey Freddie, wait up," he called, jogging after her.

"I really can't talk to you right now, Daniel," she said, keeping her voice steady.

"I'm _fine_, Freddie, really. Like Professor Dumbledore said, no harm done."

"No harm done?" she hissed, rounding on him. "_No harm done_? Your little _Mudblood _girlfriend screaming in the Great Hall that I'd poisoned you, that I'd killed you?!"

"She just freaked, Freddie, she doesn't know you. You're older, you're a Slytherin. Honestly I think she's scared of you."

"She should be! Her _theatrics _in the Great Hall cost me my Potions apprenticeship – the _one _thing that mattered most to me, the one thing I've had to be excited about in god knows how long!"

"What? He didn't! I'll go talk to him-"

"No! Just stay out of it. Go find your girlfriend and do whatever it is you do. Just leave me alone..." she said the last sentence weakly, feeling defeated.

Daniel stopped in his tracks. Freddie kept on walking. She didn't even look back.

#

Snape didn't speak to her throughout the class period. He didn't so much as look at her. Freddie was miserable at first but as she worked on her Potions assignment she felt calmer.

When the bell rang she tried to linger, tried to muster the courage to ask Snape if her apprenticeship was really over. But she was terrified of getting yelled at again. Eventually she scurried out after her classmates with Snape still ignoring her.

When she got to Art class she ignored Daniel. She didn't go for the paints but instead grabbed a lump of clay and went to a table in the corner. No one sat near her and for a while she just stared at the lump of clay, feeling useless.

_This is supposed to be my outlet_, she thought to herself. _I can let myself feel things here without harming anyone. _

She picked up the ball of clay and began to work it with her bare hands. She let herself feel all the emotions she had been trying to process – anger, rage, humiliation. She let her emotions and her magic flow into her hands, into the clay as she worked it.

She closed her eyes as she molded the clay and didn't open her eyes until she felt drained. She looked at the clay figure in front of her and let out a hollow chuckle. It was a girl – that looked suspiciously like Heather – being eaten alive by spiders. It was very detailed. The girl's mouth was open in a silent scream as spiders consumed her, crawling into her mouth and eye sockets.

"Hmm," said Professor Merritt as she passed by her desk but she didn't stop. She continued around the classroom, checking everyone's progress. Freddie shrugged and got out her wand to finish the project. She glazed it and applied intense heat, mimicking the effects of a kiln. When the bell rang she shoved the clay figure in her bag and headed down to lunch.

She sat with her fellow Slytherins and picked at her food. She felt tired. _I'm so ready for this day to be over_, she thought.

"What's wrong, Freddie?" Maggie asked, sitting down beside her. "You're usually more enthusiastic about lunch."

"I'm fine," she said with a shrug and smiled slightly at her housemate. "Wishing I didn't have to go to Care of Magical Creatures."

"You could fake sick," she suggested.

"Yeah but then I'd have to go to the nurse," she said, making a face.

She was already avoiding going to Madam Pomfrey for her finger, which was still throbbing from the fanged geranium bite.

"Guess it depends on which you think is worse – going to class or going to the nurse," Maggie said.

"Oh crap, Snape is coming over here and he does _not _look happy," Christine said from across the table.

"When does he ever look happy?" Maggie pointed out, rolling her eyes.

Freddie didn't look up from her plate until Snape was standing right behind her.

"Come with me, Miss Gray," he said, his voice sounding stern.

Freddie looked helplessly at her friends as she got up from the table. Maggie looked sympathetic and handed Freddie her bag. She slung her bag over her shoulder and followed Snape from the Great Hall.

Neither of them spoke as Freddie followed him down into the dungeons to his office. Her heart was pounding as she followed him inside, wondering if he was going to shout at her again.

"You have a mess to clean up, Miss Gray," he said, pointing to the Brewing Room. She peeked inside and saw that the cauldron of Felix Felicis had bubbled over and formed a hardened glob around the cauldron.

"Oh," she said, crestfallen. "I was supposed to come tend to it during lunch, but, since you said my apprenticeship is over, I didn't..."

He looked at her a long moment, his face hard and unreadable.

"I did not say that," he said finally.

"No, you shouted it."

"No, I-" he paused and lowered his voice. "I did not say that your apprenticeship was over, I said that it _could _be – if you ever use one of our potions on a fellow student again."

"...Really?" Freddie said, feeling hope swell in her chest.

"I've spoken to Professor Dumbledore and he agrees with your statement. He believes it to be a prank that got out of hand. He believes you were telling the truth."

"I would never lie to you!" she said, aghast.

"Promise?" he said with a smirk.

"Yes! Honestly, I don't think I could even if I wanted to," she admitted.

"Clean up your mess, Miss Gray. You will have to start over."

Freddie pulled out her wand to clean up the ruined potion but Snape grabbed her arm.

"What happened to your finger?" he demanded.

Freddie looked down at her hand. Her pinkie finger was swollen and had turned purple.

"Fanged geranium bite," she said, wincing as he examined her finger.

"A juvenile plant?"

"Yes sir."

"Their bites contain more toxins than the mature ones. Go to the Hospital Wing," he ordered. "You can clean up your mess later."

Freddie hesitated. She didn't want to be disobedient but she _really _didn't want to go to the nurse.

"Oh for heavens sake," Snape snapped. "Sit."

He pointed to the chair in front of his desk. Freddie sat quickly, putting her bag in the chair next to her.

"Foolish girl," he muttered, digging through his desk and pulling out the box from before. He got out a rag and poured something foul-smelling onto it.

"Hold this to the wound," he said, giving her the cloth. "It will draw out the poison."

"Thank you," she said quietly.

"Foolish girl," he repeated, then swept past her into the Brewing Room. She watched him vanish the ruined cauldron and its contents, then he went into the supply closet.

Freddie sat there with the rag pressed to her finger unable to help but smile a little. She'd thought for sure her apprenticeship was over and her life was ruined. But apparently not. She'd screwed up for sure but she wasn't about to make that mistake twice.

"Drink this," Snape said, coming back into the room with a small vial and handing it to her.

"It will remove the remaining traces of the plant's venom from your bloodstream."

"Thank you sir," she said gratefully. She drank the potion and looked wistfully at the Brewing Room. "I wish I could get started on the Felix Felicis again instead of going to Care of Magical Creatures."

"...You need to keep that pressed to your finger for the next 10 minutes. Then you can work on your potion. I will tell Professor Kettleburn you are being treated for a venomous bite and to excuse you from class."

"Really? Thank you! I could hug you!"

"Not if you wish to keep all of your limbs," he said darkly, quickly moving away from her towards the door. "I have a class to teach."

Freddie laughed and Snape scowled at her before leaving the room. Inside she was thinking that she had never loved him more.


	17. Chapter 17

She spent the rest of the afternoon in the Brewing Room. She'd had a free period scheduled after Care of Magical Creatures so she was able to keep working and get caught back up on the Felix Felicis. When she had to let it stew for an hour, she pulled out her books and started on her homework that she'd fallen just a bit behind on.

When the bell rang for dinner, she placed a stasis spell on her potion and packed up her school books.

She ate vivaciously at dinner, her appetite having improved with her mood.

"Saw you got out of class," Maggie said with a grin. "Nice."

"Yeah – I actually had a legitimate injury. I got bit by a fanged geranium this morning. Did you know the little ones have more venom than the adults?"

"No, I didn't, but I dropped Herbology after last year," she said with a shrug. "You okay?"

"Oh yeah. Good as new, see?" she said, wiggling her little finger.

"Hey, you wanna do our Potions homework together after we eat?"

"Eh, I'm actually working on a potion with Professor Snape," she said with a half-smile. "Sorry."

"No, that's cool – he's not mad at you? He looked pissed earlier."

"Nah that's just his face," she said, smirking.

Maggie laughed loudly but stopped suddenly.

"Get outta here, Gryffindor," she hissed and Freddie turned to see Daniel and Heather walking towards her.

"Freddie can we talk?" Daniel asked nervously.

She nodded and took a sip of her juice before getting up. They followed her away from the boos and hisses of the Slytherin table. They stepped out into the entrance hall and she turned to them.

"Heather wanted to apologize-" Daniel began.

"I'm sorry," Heather interrupted. "Really sorry, Gray. This morning, when I saw Daniel collapse, I just, I freaked out. I'm sorry. I don't know you all that well. I don't really know you at all. I just know you're a Slytherin. I don't know any Slytherins, just what my housemates say about them...but I _do _know that you're Daniel's best friend and I should have trusted that. I'm sorry. And I'm really, really sorry," she said, tears filling her sky blue eyes. "That I messed up your apprenticeship with Professor Snape."

"Actually, you didn't. I talked to him and we're – we're good. So...we're good," Freddie said, a little uncomfortable.

"Really? Oh that's wonderful!" Heather said, throwing her arms around Freddie, who stiffened instantly.

"She's a hugger," Daniel said with a grin.

"I'm not," Freddie said, pulling away from her. "Sorry."

"No, it's fine," Heather said with a chuckle. "And for what it's worth – I'd like to get to know you, Gray. I think we can be friends."

"Sure," Freddie said with a forced smile. "Daniel can I talk to you a minute?"

"Oh I'll be- in there," Heather said, kissing Daniel's cheek and heading back into the Great Hall. Daniel watched her go then turned back to Freddie.

"I'm sorry," Freddie said. "For shouting at you and for knocking you out with a potion."

"We're good, Fred. No worries. We've had fights before, we get over it."

"We're good?"

"Yeah, we're good. You really gonna try and be friends with Heather?"

"Ehh," Freddie said with a grimace. "I guess. I mean, she's still a _Gryffindor_."

"Yeah but I like her," he said, grinning. "So, you wanna go play Quidditch with us after dinner?"

"Not tonight, okay? I've got a-"

"Potion brewing," he finished. "That's okay – I'm glad, actually, that he took you back."

"Me too. Another time though. Definitely."

"Later, Fred," he said, clapping her on the back before she headed into the dungeons.

#

Freddie had been working on her potion for a couple of hours when Snape came into his office.

"Are you in here, Miss Gray?" she heard him call when he came in.

"Yes sir, working on my potion," she called back. "I didn't miss curfew, did I?"

"No, you have another half hour or so," he said, hanging up his cloak and standing in the doorway of the Brewing Room. "I was thinking of having some tea. Would you like some?"

"Yes, please," she said, pleasantly surprised.

He nodded to her and went back out to his desk. She heard him call for Noelle. She got to a stopping point with her potion and cleaned up for the night. When she went out into the office there was a tea tray on his desk and Snape was already sipping a cup.

"Chamomile?" she guessed, inhaling deeply as she sat down.

"Mm. My own blend," he said.

"You made a tea?" she asked, surprised.

"Several. Try it," he said, pulling the sugar bowl away from her. "_before _you sugar it beyond recognition."

"Okay," she chuckled.

She poured tea into her cup from the teapot and took a small sip.

"Mm," she said appreciatively. "Ah...valerian root?"

"Mm-hm."

"Lavender and...lemongrass."

"Yes. It's good, is it not?"

"It _is_," she agreed. "I just need a _tiiiny _bit of sugar."

"You're killing me," he groaned, relinquishing the sugar bowl.

"Just a spoonful," she said, adding it to her cup. She leaned back in her chair, crossing her legs. "So you're a tea aficionado? I knew your tea tasted different from the tea in the Great Hall."

"Yes. I've found many Potion Masters enjoy the subtle complexities involved in brewing tea," he said. "That is why I use Noelle – she is the only house elf I've found that can brew a decent part of tea."

"Hmm. I've never give tea much thought," Freddie said, taking a sip. "It's just a drink."

"Just a drink?" he scoffed. "That's like saying Potions is just a class."

Freddie nodded thoughtfully.

"I suppose I'll have to try more new types of tea."


	18. Chapter 18

**Author's Note: I'm about to post two important chapters to thank you all for being so great and also because I'm impatient and ready to share them now! lol **

October came and went, leading into colder days as November passed. Freddie hung out with Daniel and Heather and she got to know the Gryffindor girl, though she still didn't care for her. She still spent most of her time holed up in Snape's office, working on her potions.

When the list came around for students who wanted to remain at school over the Christmas holiday, Freddie immediately put her name down. She was almost giddy at the thought of how much free time she'd have to brew. She wondered if Snape were staying.

When he came around to collect the list at the end of lunch, Freddie got up and followed him out of the Great Hall.

"Hey," she said, catching up to him as he headed down into the dungeons. "Are you staying here over the holiday?"

"I always do, Miss Gray," he answered.

"Always? Don't you have any family?"

"No."

"Friends?" she asked.

He squinted at her and said nothing.

"Jeez," she said. "Do you even have a house or do you just brood around here year round?"

"I have a house, Miss Gray."

"Hm," Freddie said, wondering to herself what sort of house Snape lived in. Alot of purebloods lived in large manors, her family included. She imagined Snape skulking around a large empty house all by himself. The thought made her a little sad.

"Is there a reason you are following me, Miss Gray?" he asked, entering the Potions classroom.

"I'm staying at Hogwarts over the holiday," she said, sitting on the edge of his desk with her legs crossed as he began to prepare for his next class.

"I am aware."

"Is it okay if I still use the Brewing Room?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" he asked, picking up the chalk to write a recipe on the chalkboard.

"I dunno. It's the holiday, no classes, you might want more privacy."

"If I desire 'privacy' I go to my quarters. Or kick you out," he said absently. "For the most part your presence in my lab does not disturb me."

"Good," Freddie said, smiling. "I'll be sure to be extra-quiet in the mornings."

"You have been," he said.

It was true. Freddie tended to her potions most days before breakfast and since the first time she hadn't caught Snape in his pajamas again, much to her disappointment. Sometimes she was done and gone before he ever woke.

"We need to make a large batch of Pepperup Potion for Madam Pomfrey this evening," he said, still writing. "The cold weather has increased the number of students who develop the 'sniffles' and she is running low."

"Sounds fun," she said with a hint of sarcasm but really the prospect of brewing a potion with him excited her. He rarely asked for her help, leaving her to brew her own potions.

"Be in my office at 7 o'clock," he said.

"It's a date," she said, hopping off his desk. Snape paused in his writing but didn't look at her. Freddie felt herself grow warm, realizing what she'd said.

"I should, uh, go write my aunt and uncle. Let them know I'm not coming home for Christmas," she said, heading for the door quickly. "Have a good class."

"I will see you after dinner, Miss Gray," he said, and continued writing.

#

Freddie went to the Common Room and sat down to write her letter. She explained that she had a lot of studying to do and didn't wish to fall behind. She gave them a brief summary of her classes, her grades, and her progress with her Potions apprenticeship. Then she wished them a Merry Christmas and signed the letter. She folded it up and went to her dorm in search of an envelope.

While digging through her trunk she came across the clay statue she'd made in Art class. She figured it would make a decent enough gift for her aunt and uncle. A girl being eaten alive by spiders...it would fit right in with their grotesque decor.

Freddie wrapped the gift and attached her letter to the package. She put on her scarf and hat and left the dungeons. She headed up to the Owlery so she could use one of the Hogwarts owls to send her package. As she climbed the steps to the Owlery, she heard music. It was eerie but familiar.

"_Welcome to the Hotel California, such a lovely place, such a lovely face. Plenty of room at the Hotel California. Any time of year, you can find it here..."_

She entered the Owlery and wasn't at all surprised to find Daniel sitting in one of the windows, legs danging out the window, his record player behind him.

"Don't owls hate eagles?" she teased.

"Hey Fred!" he said, looking surprised but happy to see her. "What're you doing?"

"Sending a letter to Cecil and Millicent. What about you – besides listening to The Eagles with the owls?"

"Just hanging out – literally," he joked, kicking his legs. "Hey, you recognized the band!"

"Well yeah. They have some pretty good songs – plus I think Don Henley might be a wizard," she said, which caused Daniel to chuckle. "Where's Heather?"

"Class. Charms, I think."

"Ah."

"Hey, you wanna go for a fly? You and I haven't done that in forever, not just the two of us."

"Okay," she agreed. "Let me send this off."

Freddie approached a large barn owl who sat on a perch, preening himself and watching them with intense yellow eyes.

"Hello there," she said softly to the bird. "Would you mind taking a Christmas gift to Gray Manor for me?"

The owl stopped preening and fluffed his mottled white feathers. He hooted loudly and extended his leg.

"Thank you," she said as she tied the parcel to his leg. "Safe flying."

They watched the owl fly off, until it was just a speck in the distance. Then, Daniel leapt up, a smile on his face.

"Hey check this out," he said, pulling out his wand. He pointed it out the window, his face screwed up in concentration. Freddie quirked her eyebrow. She was about to ask what she was supposed to be seeing when she saw it – two broomsticks hurtling towards them across the grounds.

"Holy crap! You did it!" Freddie exclaimed. "You mastered the nonverbal summoning charm!"

"Yeah – I know, you can say it, I'm awesome, right?" he said, smirking.

"You _suck_!" Freddie said, punching him and grabbing her broom. "_And _you're awesome. Let's fly."

Daniel strapped his record player to the handle of his broom in front of him.

"_Stabilis_," he said, tapping it with his wand.

"What're you doing?" Freddie asked, mounting her broom.

"Stability Spell. Keeps the record player steady so I can listen to music while I fly, without having to stick to the Quidditch pitch."

"Nice. You ready?"

"Yup. Let's go!"

Daniel took off and Freddie followed him. The sound of _Life in the Fast Lane _followed him as well. They flew around the castle, circling the highest towers. As they zoomed down over the light drifts.

"It's snowing!" Freddie laughed delightedly.

They flew skywards, circling each other and laughing. Daniel had his tongue out, trying to catch snowflakes on his tongue.

Another familiar song started and Freddie stopped in mid air.

"I _love _that song!" she exclaimed. She pulled out her wand and pointed it at the record player. "_Sonorous_."

The music played louder and Freddie began to sing along.

"_Raven hair and ruby lips, sparks fly from her fingertips. Echoed voices in the night, she's a restless spirit on a endless flight."_

_ "Woo hoo, witchy woman, see how high she flies," _Daniel joined in. _"Woo hoo, witchy woman, she's got the moon in her eyes... _Oh my God, it's totally you! This is your song!"

"Hell yeah!" Freddie declared and began the second verse.

#

They flew for the rest of the afternoon. When it was time for Care of Magical Creatures class, they flew down to find Professor Kettleburn but he told them he was canceling class due to the weather. The snow had started coming down thicker and it wasn't due to stop. Freddie and Daniel shared a wicked grin and took off again.

When they were soaked from the snow they touched down outside the broom shed.

"You wanna go inside, work on homework?" Freddie asked. "My hands are practically frozen to my broom. I don't have to meet Snape til 7."

Daniel pulled out his wand and hit her with a spell that dried her clothes. Then he did the same thing to himself.

"Actually, you wanna walk for a bit?" he asked. "I'm not ready to go in quite yet."

"Sure," she agreed.

Freddie cast a spell to keep the snow off of them as they started walking along the edge of the forest. Daniel charmed his record player to float between them.

"I've got something to keep us warm," he said mischievously. Freddie glanced at him and he pulled a bottle of Firewhiskey out of his pocket.

"Where'd you get that?" she gasped as he took a swig.

"Swiped it," he said with a grin. "Want some?"

Freddie nodded and took the bottle. She took a swig and the cinnamon-flavored whiskey burned her throat all the way down to her stomach. The warmth spread through her and she took another drink.

"You really stole this?"

"Yep."

"When did you become such a Slytherin?" she teased.

"Learned from the best," he said with a wink.

"Are you going home for the holiday?" she asked as they continued walking and drinking.

"Yeah – well, Heather wants me to meet her parents, so I'm gonna go home with her."

"Mm. Getting serious, eh?" Freddie said, taking a deep drink from the bottle.

"Yeah. You know I think this may really be something, me and her. Like I could see a future with her, ya know?"

"What, like marriage?" Freddie asked, making a face.

"Would that be so bad?" he asked. "I mean, you like her, right?"

"She's..."

"A Gryffindor, I know."

"Yeah. She's alright, though. She's just...cheery. And she's like...happy. All the time. And she hugs."

"Yeah," Daniel chuckled. "But...what d'you think? I dunno, 5, 10 years from now? Do you think, if I asked her, and she said yes, would you be happy for me? Would you be my best man?"

"You _do _know that I'm a girl, right?" Freddie asked sardonically.

"Shut up," Daniel said, shoving her and laughing loudly. "I'm serious."

"You're drunk," she snorted.

"_Freddie_..."

"Yes, okay, fine. I'll be your hypothetical best man at your hypothetical future wedding with the Gryffindor girl."

"Thanks Fred," he said, grinning at her.

"Play my song again, you arse," she said, giving him a shove, smiling. Daniel saluted her and flicked his wand.

_Raven hair and ruby lips, sparks fly from her fingertips..._


	19. Chapter 19

The next thing Freddie knew she was waking up and she didn't know where she was. She heard voices, whispering, and she opened her eyes. A ceiling she didn't recognize. She turned her head and saw Snape, Dumbledore, and Madam Pomfrey with their backs to her, whispering. She was in the Hospital Wing.

Her brain felt clouded and confused. _How did I get here?_

Then it hit her. The heavy, sickly scent of blood. Human blood. She looked down to see she was covered in blood. Her robes were soaked, her arms and legs coated. She began to scream, unable to stop herself.

The adults all rushed over to her.

"Where – how did I get here? What happened? Where – where's Daniel?" she asked, looking around the Hospital Wing. She didn't see him. She looked at the adults, who all looked at one another.

"_Where's Daniel?!_" she demanded.

"We were hoping you could tell us," Dumbledore said quietly.

Freddie's heart was pounding in her chest. All she could smell was blood and it was making her sick.

"You were found in the snow at the edge of the forest, unconscious and covered in blood," Dumbledore said.

"Human blood," Snape said softly. "From an adolescent male wizard."

"What?" Freddie whispered, feeling her blood run cold.

"According to Professor Kettleburn the two of you were together this afternoon," Dumbledore said.

"We were. We were flying. Was there an accident? No...no, we went for a walk, we were walking and talking about...I don't remember."

"You don't remember what you were talking about?" Dumbledore asked.

"No, I do, but...We were walking...and then I was here," she said, wracking her brain but it was a blank. "Where is he? Where's Daniel? We need to go find him."

She tried to get up but Madam Pomfrey pushed her back in the bed.

"Let me go!" she shouted, and her magic shocked Madam Pomfrey who let out a yelp and drew back.

"Winifred," Snape said loudly. "They are looking for him. People from the Ministry, dozens of people, are out looking for him."

"That's not good enough!" she flared and the force of her magical energy scattered the empty beds and shattered vials around the room.

"Get her a Calming Draught," Snape said and Madam Pomfrey nodded and hurried off.

"I'm not taking any damn potion! Not while my best friend is missing, it's – it's dark out, it's getting colder..." she looked anxiously at the window.

"Miss Gray are you sure you don't remember anything?" Dumbledore asked. "Was there anyone else with you?"

"No, I don't think so."

"A creature, maybe? Did you go into the forest?"

"No, we – I don't – I don't think we did."

"Were you angry with him? Did the two of you argue?"

"No!" she exclaimed and the sheets flew off of all the beds.

"Severus," Dumbledore said, looking to Snape. "We have to be sure."

"Albus...she's a student," he said quietly, a tone in his voice Freddie had never heard and couldn't identify. She didn't know what they were talking about and she didn't care. She didn't understand why they weren't looking for Daniel. She was confused and growing angrier by the second.

"We have to be sure," Dumbledore repeated.

"Here we are, dearie," Madam Pomfrey said, coming back with a goblet. "This will make you feel better."

"I'm not taking _any damn potion_!" Freddie snarled, lunging at the nurse, intent on knocking the goblet from her hands. But suddenly she found herself immobilized. Dumbledore had his wand out and was pointing it at her. She tried to scream at him, but she couldn't scream, she couldn't talk, she couldn't move a muscle.

"I'm sorry, Miss Gray, but I cannot have you attacking my staff," Dumbledore said calmly. With a flick of his wand he forced her back into a reclining position on the bed. "Severus?"

"This will help," Snape said, taking the goblet from Madam Pomfrey. "Gray, you need to drink this."

Freddie still couldn't move so she glared daggers at him. Snape exhaled sharply and seemed to steel himself. Suddenly he grabbed her head, grabbing a fistful of her hair painfully as he forced her head back and her mouth open. He poured the potion into her mouth and Freddie started to choke. He tossed the goblet aside and held her mouth closed with his free hand.

"Swallow," he commanded. "...Don't you _dare _spit on me, Gray."

She swallowed, hating him. All of them. But almost immediately she felt the potion start to work. Her heart rate slowed and her limbs felt heavy. Her mind felt foggy and her body relaxed.

"Severus," Dumbledore said. "We may not have much time..."

Snape pulled out his wand and grimaced just for a second as he turned back to Freddie.

"It will hurt less if you do not resist," he said quietly. "_Legilimens_."

She felt a sharp pain in her head, felt something strange and unfamiliar. Memories were drawn up as pictures in her mind.

_Sitting on Snape's desk earlier this afternoon...writing her letter in the Common Room...watching the owl fly away...flying with Daniel...walking with Daniel. _Here the visions slowed and she recalled every detail of her conversation with Daniel as they walked and drank Firewhiskey. She didn't try to fight it, she wanted to know what happened next. The conversation, the song, the chorus of _Witchy Woman_...then nothing. The next memory was waking up just a few moments ago. '_I'm sorry'_. Was that Snape's voice?

"There's nothing," Snape said aloud and Freddie opened her eyes. "She has no memory of what happened."

A shadow passed over Dumbledore's face. He looked deeply troubled.

"I am going to join the search party," Dumbledore said, heading for the door. He glanced back at Snape, but he didn't move from Freddie's bedside. Dumbledore nodded slightly and left.

Freddie felt fuzzy, her limbs felt heavy. She tried to focus but it was difficult.

_Daniel...need to find him...need to move...I should get up..._

"You should sleep, Miss Gray," Snape said quietly as Madam Pomfrey went into her office.

"Daniel..." she said, her voice thick.

"They will find him."

"Find him," she repeated. "Professor...find him. Please."

She felt her eyes closing in spite of her effort. She prayed Snape understood her.

"I will go join the search party," he said, straightening up.

_Thank you..._


	20. Chapter 20

The next few days passed in a hazy, medicated blur. Freddie didn't know how much time had passed. She knew that they hadn't found Daniel. She knew that Snape was near her, often. She knew that every time she started to get frustrated, or angry, she was made to drink a potion that made her sleep.

One night she woke up and she was alone. She sat up. She didn't feel tired or groggy. She wasn't wearing her bloody robes anymore, someone had changed her into a hospital gown.

She listened intently for any sound of anyone moving before she slipped out of bed. She looked for her wand and became briefly annoyed when she couldn't find it.

_Keep calm_, she told herself. _If you don't keep calm someone will catch you. Think of something. Potions. Potion recipe. Let's see..._

The only thing that came to mind was the Calming Draught she'd been forced to take.

_Add six drops of fluxweed oil to one pint of purified water. Add the inner membrane and fluid from 3 bloodroot stems. _

She continued the recipe in her head as she quietly searched for her wand.

_Alternate clockwise and counter-clockwise stirring until the potion begins to steam. Mince one valerian root and add it to the potion. _

She found her trunk with all of her belongings tucked under the hospital bed. She didn't stop to wonder why it was there, but opened it and found her wand on top. She grabbed it and immediately tapped herself on the head, applying a Disillusionment Charm.

It wasn't flawless, she wasn't completely invisible, but it was good enough. She left the Hospital Wing quietly and headed down the stairs. The stone floor was cold on her bare feet, but she didn't feel it. Her mind was focused on one thing and one thing only.

Filch was in the entrance hall and Freddie pressed herself into the shadows, standing completely still. When Filch lurked off into the dungeon, Freddie left the castle. There was a thick layer of snow on the ground and her feet left tracks as she made her way to the forest.

She removed her Disillusionment Charm as she reached the edge of the forest and immediately began calling Daniel's name.

"Daniel!" she shouted, heading into the woods. Her feet were cold and being scratched by briers, but she didn't feel them.

"Daniel!" she yelled. "Where are you? It's me, you can come out! Daniel!"

It was dark and she couldn't see so she pulled out her wand. Then an idea hit her.

"Find Daniel," she said, holding her wand flat in the palm of her hand. It didn't move. "Find Daniel. Find Daniel! Find Daniel, you useless piece of crap!"

She threw her wand and it hit a tree, sending off a shower of red sparks. She sank to the ground, sobbing. She knew what it meant, but she wouldn't accept it. He wasn't gone. He couldn't be gone.

She drew her legs up in front of her and hugged herself, sobbing Daniel's name. Her tears froze to her face.

"Winifred!"

She gasped and looked up, hoping for Daniel. It was only Snape.

"Idiot girl! You'll freeze to death!" he said, removing his cloak and wrapping it around her.

"He's gone," she sobbed, her teeth chattering. "I can't find him, he's g-gone."

"Hush," he said harshly, then changed his tone, softening it. "Come with me."

Freddie didn't move but sat there trembling, sobs wracking her frame. Snape squatted beside her then did something that surprised her so much she stopped crying – he scooped her up.

"Where's your wand?" he asked, one arm around her shoulders, one beneath her legs. "I know you didn't get out here without one."

"T-tossed it," she said, shivering.

"Idiot girl," he muttered, pushing her closer to his chest as he dug out his wand. "_Accio_."

Her wand came flying out of the snow and he grabbed it, nearly dropping her. He tossed both their wands on her stomach and got a better grip on her.

"I n-need to f-find him," she said, struggling weakly against him.

"Be still," Snape said, holding her tighter as he carried her through the forest. "They cannot find him, Winifred, we can't find him. It's been a week. He's-"

"No!" she said, striking his chest and sobbing again. "He's not dead! He's not! Don't you dare say-"

"He's gone, Gray. He's gone and I'm not going to let you freeze to death trying to find him."

Freddie hit him again but she was weak and was just beginning to realize how cold she actually was. She hit him again but he just held her closer. Finally she just buried her face in his chest and cried.

Snape carried her out of the forest and trudged through the snow-covered grounds towards the castle. She put her arms around his neck and held on tight. He readjusted his grip on her and carried her up the stairs. She laid her head against his chest. She had no more tears to cry, no more fight left in her.

She could hear his heart beating, strong and steady, in his chest and it soothed her. He smelled of potion ingredients, of herbs, and that soothed her as well. He carried her up the stairs, into the Hospital Wing, and laid her back in her bed.

She was too cold, too tired to say or do anything as he took his cloak from her. He pulled the blankets over her and sat down in the chair next to her bed. It was dark, there were no candles lit, but she could see his face by the moonlight coming through the windows.

"I was coming to tell you – we found this," he said, indicating the table beside her bed. It was Daniel's record player. Freddie inhaled sharply.

"Is it yours?" Snape asked.

Tears filled her eyes. She wanted it, wanted to say it was hers so she could keep it. But she couldn't lie to Snape. She closed her eyes and shook her head no.

She heard him get up and she opened her eyes. He pulled her trunk out from under the bed, opened it, and put the record player in it. He held a finger to his lips and pushed the trunk back under her bed. She nodded silently.

"You should sleep," he said softly, sitting back down beside her.

Freddie nodded again and lay still. She watched Snape and he watched her, his face unreadable. She was almost asleep when he spoke.

"They're transferring you tomorrow," he said quietly. "To St Mungos."

Freddie opened her eyes and stared at him, speechless.

"There's nothing I can do about it," he continued, his voice almost inaudible. "Dumbledore thinks they may be able to help you."

She exhaled slowly and closed her eyes. She didn't care what happened to her now. Daniel was gone. She fell asleep with Snape watching over her.

**Author's Note: I know you guys hate me right now 😅 No worries, i'm fixing to get some more typing done and will have another update soon! Side note, to the reviewer who was turned off by Freddie using Mudblood so flippantly, it's the way she was raised and something she will learn better soonish. As of now she is unaware of Snape's blood status and thinks he is pureblood like she is. He will teach her better, don't worry and I hope it hasn't turned you off reading the story. Thanks everyone! **


	21. Chapter 21

The next morning Freddie was transferred to St Mungo's and admitted to the Janus Thickey Ward. It was the wizarding equivalent of a Muggle psych ward. Snape had been gone from her bedside when she was woke up and she felt alone in the hospital.

Several Healers tried to talk to her. She ignored them. She lay in the bed, staring at the ceiling, feeling nothing. She slept, on and off, throughout the day. They brought her a tray of food for lunch. She didn't touch it.

In the late afternoon, the Healer in charge of the patients, Miriam Strout, came and took the untouched tray away.

"You should eat, dearie," she said, clicking her tongue. "You'll never get better and back to school if you don't eat."

"I don't care," she said tonelessly.

Miriam clucked her tongue sympathetically.

"You have some visitors. Are you up for it, Winnie, dear?"

Freddie shrugged. She didn't care for the nickname the motherly-looking Healer had bestowed upon her but she couldn't bring herself to care enough to be annoyed.

"I'll leave you three alone," Miriam said and Freddie finally looked over to see her aunt and uncle standing in the doorway, smiling at her. Her Uncle Cecil was a tall, burly man with a thick graying beard. His wife was equally tall, but thin with dark hair and even darker makeup, save for her blood-red lipstick. They walked over to her and pulled the curtains around her bed.

"We knew you'd turn out just like your parents," her aunt Millicent said, sitting in the chair beside her bed and patting her hand.

"For your sake I hope you hid the body well," her uncle said with a twisted grin.

"Cecil," his wife hissed. "You don't know who could be listening."

A sickening feeling came over Freddie as she realized what they meant. They thought she had killed him.

"I d-didn't! He- we-"

"Hush now, this isn't the place to discuss it," Millicent said, squeezing her hand. "We're going to get you out of here."

"Quite right," Cecil said. "No niece of mine is going to stay in this loony bin. We're taking you home."

"We'll have a grand feast to celebrate, all of your favorites, and you can tell us all about the little Mudblood boy," her aunt said, squeezing her hand once more before getting up.

Freddie lay there, feeling stunned. They thought she killed Daniel...and they were proud! She felt sick to her stomach.

She heard a commotion from the hallway. Heard her uncle's booming voice arguing with the Healer about taking her home. She got out of bed on trembling legs and staggered to the door.

"I don't want to go with you," she said quietly.

"She doesn't know what she's saying," her uncle said, putting a hand on her shoulder. She wrenched herself away from him.

"Just go!" she shouted, startling the adults in the hallway. "I don't want to go with you! Just leave!"

The force of her anger shook the hall and portraits fell from the walls. Nearby Healers and orderlies hurried towards her.

"Winifred-" her uncle began sternly.

"Go, get out of here!" she yelled. "I don't want to go with you!"

A blast of white energy surged from her body and blasted Cecil off his feet. Freddie was quickly restrained several large Healers. Her uncle got to his feet with a huff.

"I think you should leave," Miriam said, standing in front of Freddie protectively. "Winnie has been admitted for treatment and she won't be leaving with you or anyone else without my permission."

"Fine," Cecil snarled, grabbing his wife's arm. "We're leaving. Keep her here forever for all I care!"

Freddie was led back to bed by the Healers. She didn't fight them. And when Miriam brought her a potion to make her sleep, she didn't fight that either. She drank it gratefully and lay back on the pillow, falling into a deep and dreamless sleep.

#

Over the next several days, Freddie met with several different Healers, too many to keep track of. They reviewed her memories with a Pensieve. They gave her potions even she didn't recognize, performed spells she'd never heard of that were supposed to jog her memory. Nothing worked.

She found some comfort in the kindly Healer Miriam. Miriam had stood up for her against her aunt and uncle, and continued to do so when she got overwhelmed with the various Healers talking to her. Miriam coaxed food into her and brought her sleeping potions when everything got to be too much.

Miriam got her out of bed one day and took her down the hall to a bathroom.

"Get you a nice, hot shower dearie and you'll feel better," Miriam said.

Freddie just stared at her. Miriam smiled sadly and began to undress her. She led Freddie gently under the hot spray of water.

Freddie stood there, letting the water pout over her. She heard Miriam gasp and when she looked down she saw blood running down her body, down the drain.

_Daniel's blood, _she realized sickly. _From my hair, it's been in my hair this whole time. _

She began to scream and pull at her hair frantically, clawing at it.

"Shh," Miriam said soothingly, putting her arms around her, not caring that her robes were getting wet. "We'll get it out, honey, it's okay..."

Freddie stood there, sobbing and shaking, as Miriam washed her hair for her. When she turned off the spray of water, Miriam left to get her a clean gown. Freddie stood there, staring at her reflection in the mirror, staring at her wet, black hair. She picked at her hair, still trembling.

_What if it was still there, what if she didn't get it all, what if..._

As she stood there, staring at her reflection in the mirror, her hair began to lighten. From the roots, spreading down her shoulders, until her hair was a light, pale blonde.

Miriam came back in with a clean gown. She looked surprised at Freddie's hair but didn't say anything. She helped her get dressed and led her back to her bed where she had a potion waiting.

"Thank you," she said quietly.

"Rest now, dearie," Miriam said, stroking her head. "You're going to be okay."


	22. Chapter 22

**Author's Note: I'm going on a girls trip to Savnnah tomorrow with my bestie. I'll only be gone one night but thought I would go ahead and post two chapters for yall tonight since tomorrow I'll be on a hearse ghost tour (apparently thats a thing). Cheers and dont forget to review! thanks!**

Days passed in much the same way, an endless stream of Healers and sleeping potions. Freddie woke one morning to find a familiar set of dark eyes watching her.

"Professor Snape," she gasped, sitting up in bed. "What – did they find-?"

He shook his head and she deflated.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"It's Christmas. I thought – well, Dumbledore thought-"

"You'd come visit me in the loony bin?" she asked dryly.

"It's not a loony bin, Gray, it's- I could leave, if you prefer."

"No," she said quickly, grabbing his hand. "Stay please. Thank you for coming."

"Well I haven't got anywhere else to go," he said, sitting down in the chair next to her bed.

"It's Christmas?" she asked.

"It is."

"I didn't realize..."

She looked around the room at all the decorations. The curtains around some of the other beds were open around the ward. Patients visiting with their families.

She looked at Snape, who seemed so out of place.

"My loony bin friends," she told him, nodding around the room. "That's Agnes – failed Animagus transformation." The fur-covered woman was visiting with a young man who must be her son. She was barking excitedly, her tail wagging under her robes. "She can't talk, only bark. She's been here for years, they can't fix her. That bed there-" she pointed to a bed where the curtains were drawn. "-that's William. Shoddy Memory Charm. Can't remember his own name. His memory resets every 10 seconds. Like a goldfish. That woman there with the weepy boyfriend? Messed up Draught of the Living Death. They think she might've tried to kill herself. She's been here 3 months and they can't wake her."

Snape shook his head slightly.

"Those two down there, with the old lady and the little boy? That's Frank and Alice. They've been here the longest. They don't talk to understand anything. They were-"

"Tortured," he finished quietly. "By a Death Eater named Bellatrix Lestrange."

"Oh. Right," she said, glancing at his left arm which he flexed absently.

"Would you like to have some tea?" he asked abruptly.

"You hiding the house elf under your robes?" she asked, quirking her eyebrow.

"No. Upstairs. There's a tea room."

"I'll have to ask Miriam if I'm allowed," she said, looking around for the witch. "I haven't been allowed to leave the ward before."

"Since when do you ask anyone's permission?" he teased.

She smiled slightly, but it felt forced.

"Miriam," Freddie said, waving her over.

"Merry Christmas, Winnie," Miriam said brightly. Her robes were decorated with Christmas trees and she had tinsel in her hair. "How are we today? Is this your brother?"

Snape made a face and Freddie chuckled.

"This is Professor Snape," she introduced. "From Hogwarts. I'm his apprentice. He's Potions Master."

"Wonderful to meet you, Professor," Miriam said, shaking his hand. "I'm so glad Winnie has a visitor for Christmas! How kind of you to come."

"Winnie?" Snape repeated, looking down at Freddie with an amused expression. She ignored him.

"Snape wants to know if we can go upstairs to have tea, mum," she asked Miriam hopefully.

"Of course, sweetie. You'll look after her, won't you dear?" Miriam asked, putting a hand on Snape's arm.

"I always do," he said a bit stiffly.

Miriam smiled kindly at him then went to fetch a robe for Freddie. It was a light-purple robe, the color that represented patients of the Janus Thickey Ward. Freddie got out of bed and Miriam helped her put the robe on.

"Thanks mum," Freddie said, tying the sash around her waist.

"Have fun you two," Miriam said cheerfully.

Freddie followed Snape out of the room and down the hall.

"Did you call that Healer 'mom'?" he asked as they walked.

"Mm. She's nice. She's been taking care of me, standing up for me, especially when my uncle..." she trailed off and grimaced. "I don't want to talk about it right now."

"Okay. That's okay," he said. They reached the end of the hall and were met with a locked door. Snape pulled out his wand and unlocked the door. They went through it and he re-locked the door. Freddie glanced back at the door as Snape led her away. She hadn't realized she was locked in. The thought annoyed her, just a little bit.

"Your hair is different," Snape said as they climbed the stairs.

"Yeah. It was an accident, sort of. Do you like it?" she asked, brushing a strand behind her ear.

"I have no opinion regarding your hair, Miss Gray."

"Can you- will you call me Freddie? Please? It's Christmas, we're not at school. I'm stuck in the loony bin with a ton of Healers calling me Miss Gray and asked me a million questions, except for Miriam. She calls me Winnie but that's still not my name."

"Neither is 'Freddie'," he pointed out. "I will call you 'Miss Gray' or I will call you Winifred. I do not do nicknames."

"You can call me Winifred, I guess...if I can call you Severus."

"No," he said.

"Please?"

"No."

"Just for today. It's Christmas."

"Fine," he said with a sigh. "For Christmas."

"Yay. Thank you, Severus."

"Ugh," he said, but she saw a hint of a smile as they entered the tearoom.

They both got a cup of tea. Snape got a raspberry scone and offered her one. She shook her head no.

"You should eat something, Winifred. A scone, cookies. Whatever you want."

"I just want tea," she muttered, looking around the crowded room. Patients and their families, sitting around, eating and chatting happily.

"They told me you haven't been eating well. You need to start eating if you want to return to school."

"Doesn't matter," she muttered.

"You don't want to come back to school?"

Freddie didn't answer. Snape put a second scone on the tray and paid the witch at the counter. He looked around a moment then led Freddie to a small table in the corner near the gift shop.

They sat and Freddie took a sip of her tea, not bothering to put sugar in it. She couldn't really taste it anyway.

"You don't want to come back to school?" he repeated. "Winifred?"

"I don't know," she mumbled. "I don't know when they'll let me leave, _if _they'll let me leave. I still can't remember..."

Snape sighed and sipped his tea. He grimaced.

"Ugh. I _should _have brought Noelle with me," he said and Freddie smiled slightly. "You need to return to school, Winifred. You have potions to tend to."

"My Felix Felicis," she gasped. "Is it-?"

"I've been tending to it, along with my own very busy schedule. There's been a bout of flu around the castle and several younger students developed Dragonpox before the holiday."

"Oh so you _need _me to come back?"

"I did not say that...but it will be nice to have my assistant back."

Freddie chuckled hollowly. She picked up a scone and took a bite. She forced herself to chew it but her mouth felt dry. She took another drink of tea.

Freddie looked out the window across the room. It was snowing heavily.

"You carried me through the snow," she said softly. She looked back at Snape who looked visibly uncomfortable. He took a drink of tea.

"You're heavier than you look," he said sardonically.

"Did you just call me fat, Severus Snape?" she demanded, laughing slightly. It felt good to laugh.

"Hmph," he said, looking down his nose at her.

"Well," she said, taking another bite of her scone. "You're stronger than you look."

Snape looked uncomfortable again and Freddie laughed at his expense.

"So," she said, changing the conversation. "You haven't screwed up my potion have you?"

"As if," he snorted. "I _saved _your potion."

"My hero," she said sarcastically, then smiled.

#

They talked about potions for a while. Snape refilled their tea and brought a bottle of grape juice. They continued talking and Freddie took a sip of juice to see if it tasted any better to her than the tea. It didn't.

"That's mine," Snape said, taking the bottle from her. "Get your own."

"I can't, I live in a loony bin now, they won't let me have any money – or a wand."

"Stop saying that," he said, wiping the mouth of the bottle on his sleeve before taking a sip.

"Did you just wipe that? I don't have _cooties_, Severus."

"You sound like a child," he snorted. "You _are _a child."

Freddie scoffed.

"Well not 'cooties' then. But you know insanity isn't contagious."

"You're not _insane_, Winifred, you're...traumatized."

Freddie's smile faltered.

"Yeah," she said softly, gazing back out the window at the snow. "...They've stopped looking? Haven't they?"

"We don't have to talk about that," Snape said quietly.

"They think I killed him. My aunt and uncle. They wanted to celebrate," she said bitterly.

"Is that why they aren't here?"

"I attacked my uncle. I didn't mean to, but it happens, you know...when I'm angry."

He nodded silently, sipping his juice.

"I don't feel bad about it," she said with a shrug. "I'm glad they're not here. I don't feel bad about knocking him on his fat ass."

"You don't have to," Snape said, then set his juice down and stood up. "Wait here a moment."

Freddie swiped his juice as he walked away and took a sip. She didn't wipe the mouth of the bottle, she didn't care about his spit. _Well actually, _she thought and smiled to herself slightly, licking her lips.

She had tried not to give much thought about her return to Hogwarts. She hadn't wanted to imagine going back to class, walking around the school, going to class, without Daniel. She couldn't imagine facing their friends, his friends, Heather...poor Heather...

_But it would be nice to have my assistant back..._

Snape's words echoed in her mind. Seeing him today reminded her, reminded her that she loved school. Imagining being back in the lab, side by side with Snape, working on potions with him, was the only thing that made her feel not-terrible for the first time in weeks.

Snape sat back down and placed a gift bag in front of her.

"What's this?" she asked, putting the juice down.

"A gift," he said. "It _is _Christmas."

"But I don't have anything for you," she protested.

"Just open the damn bag, Winifred."

Freddie chuckled and opened the bag. Curious she pulled out something furry and looked it over. A golden cat-like creature with large ears, like a house elf, and a tail like a lion.

"A kneazle," she said, surprised and amused.

"It was that or a teddy bear, which looks nothing like an actual bear," he said, finishing off his scone.

"Thank you, Severus," she said, hugging the stuffed creature. "That was really sweet of you."

He shrugged uncomfortably.

"Eat your scone," he muttered.

#


	23. Chapter 23

#

Snape stayed with her until late in the afternoon. He returned her to the fourth floor and stayed with her just a while longer, talking about what potions he had planned for the 6th years in the spring.

"I have a potion I need to get back to soon," he said eventually, checking his watch.

"I understand. Thank you for coming to spend Christmas with me, Severus," she said softly, feeling her cheeks grow warm.

"It was Albus' idea," he muttered, looking away from her.

"Well, tell Professor Dumbledore I said thank you," she said, smiling at him and hugging her kneazle.

"I shall. Goodbye Winifred."

"Bye Severus. Merry Christmas."

She watched him leave, then lay down in bed cuddling her kneazle.

_He needs a name, _she thought as she snuggled the plush. _Maybe something Potion-y. I could call him Severus. _She chuckled to herself and decided against it. She went through a list of potions ingredients in her head. She pictured the storage closet in her mind and mentally went through the shelves.

_Aconite...Antimony...Arnica...Eye of Newt. Newt could be good, like Newt Scamander. Daniel worships him. _A pain went through her heart and she took a deep breath. _Don't think about Daniel right now. Think about potions and names for your kneazle. Fluxweed...Foxglove...Griffin claw...Hemlock._

She opened her eyes and looked at the plush kneazle. His green glass eyes stared back at her and she smiled.

"Hemlock it is," she whispered and tucked the kneazle under her chin. She closed her eyes and let herself drift off to sleep.

Freddie woke a few hours later, feeling full of energy for the first time in weeks. The ward had quieted down and she opened the curtain around her bed to see everyone was asleep. Miriam was in her office which had a window that looked out on the room. Freddie could see her in there, reading a book, but her eyes were half-closed and she was nodding off.

Freddie felt a mischievous streak and she wished she had her wand. Visiting with Snape had reminded her of something. This was St Mungos, the place where she had wanted to work someday. Somewhere in this building, probably in the basement, there was a team of Potioneers who worked day and night to provide medicine for the hospital. She wanted to go find them.

She pulled the curtains back around her bed and thought for a minute. She peeked out once more at the dozing Healer. She tucked Hemlock beneath her arm, then fucked out beneath the curtains on the other side of her bed.

She snuck out into the hallway and was pleased to find it deserted.

_It's Christmas. Most of the Healers are probably home with their families._

She reached the locked door at the end of the hall and stopped. She had no wand. She didn't even know where it was. She thought of earlier, how Snape had unlocked the door so easily, with just a flick of his wand, no incantation.

_If I can do magic without my wand without meaning to, maybe I can _make _myself do it_, she thought.

She put both hands on the doorknob and focused. _Unlock! _She thought forcefully, but nothing happened. _Alohamora! Come on...let me out! I really really want to get out of here. Let me out!_

She felt the doorknob grow hot in her hand then gasped when she heard the quiet but distinct 'click' of the lock turning.

She let herself out quickly but quietly. She shut the door carefully behind her. Gleefully she headed off down the stairs, Hemlock still tucked under her arm.

She made it down a few flights of stairs before she heard voices coming up the stairs.

"Man, I can't _believe _we're stuck working on Christmas," said a voice.

Freddie pressed herself into the shadows, wishing she had her wand to cast her Disillusionment Charm.

"Suck it up, O'Brien. We're interns. Low men on the totem pole. Double shifts, night shifts, holidays. That's all we're going to see for the next two years. Get used to it," said another voice.

_Hide, I need to hide, I need to disappear_, Freddie thought frantically.

"Ugh, I need coffee," said the first intern, clomping up the stairs.

"Yep, then it's back to dangerous bites and bugs," said the second.

Freddie closed her eyes as they stepped onto the landing, knowing she was about to be dragged back to her ward.

"Man, I'm ready for something _cool _to come through here, like a werewolf bite," said O'Brien as they walked right past Freddie. "When's the next full moon?"

"You're terrible, O'Brien!" said the other intern, laughing at his friend as they continued up the stairs.

Freddie stepped out of the shadows and looked down. Only there was nothing there.

"I'm invisible?" she murmured.

"You hear something?" O'Brien said and Freddie clamped a hand over her mouth.

"You're just tired," said his friend. "Come on, I can smell the coffee already."

Freddie held out her hand, only she didn't have one. She was completely invisible. It was even better than the chameleon-like effect of the Disillusionment Charm. Even Hemlock was invisible.

Freddie grinned wickedly and continued down the stairs. The stairs ended on the ground floor where a tired-looking receptionist checked in patients sporting various injuries and ailments. She watched a man with tentacles coming from his head and wondered if it were a spell or a potion gone wrong.

_Remember where you're going_, she reminded herself. _Look for the Potioneers._

Freddie moved around the reception area, looking for a sign. There were signs everywhere, depicting what went on on each floor, but there was nothing about the brewers, no signs that said basement.

Finally, she started opening doors. The first few led to offices, which were empty this time of night. She was becoming dejected when a door opened and a witch wearing lime-green Healer robes came out, carrying several bottles of potions.

Freddie gasped excitedly and slipped quietly past the struggling witch in through the door before it shut. The door led to a descending staircase, not unlike the Hogwarts dungeons. Clutching the invisible Hemlock, Freddie headed down the stone staircase. It was lit by torchlight and she followed the spiraling steps down until they opened up into a large circular room.

There were dozens of cauldrons bubbling around the room with a dozen or so witches and wizards in blood-red robes tended to them. Freddie inhaled deeply, the scent of potions brewing familiar and comforting to her.

Freddie entered the room quietly. She sat beside the staircase, where she wouldn't be stumbled on. She held Hemlock in her lap and settled in to watch the Potioneers work.

#

"Who is she?"

"Where'd she come from?"

"She wasn't there a minute ago!"

Freddie opened her eyes groggily and found several people in red robes staring down at her. She looked down and saw that she had become visible once more.

_I fell asleep_, she realized, clutching Hemlock to her chest.

"She's the girl they're looking for from the 4th floor I bet," said one of the wizards.

"Oops," Freddie said, getting up. "Sorry. I just wanted to see...I'll, uh...I'll leave now."

"I'll take you back where you belong," said a kind witch, smiling down at her.

"Thank you," she said, looking past them at the cauldrons. "Um, you might want to add more aconite to that and stir it, before it boils over."

"Huh? Oh, crap," said one of the men, rushing back over to his potion.

Freddie smirked slightly and looked around for the redheaded young man she'd been watching last night.

"The Expectorant Draught you messed up last night – you added eleuthero root instead of elecampane," she told him. "You were trying to figure out where you went wrong. I wanted to tell you."

"That true, Hargreaves?" the witch asked him, and the boy flushed.

"It was a...long night, ma'am," he said, looking down at his shoes.

Freddie felt somewhat smug and she took the offered hand of the witch who was waiting on her.

"So, you like potions, huh?" the witch asked, leading her back up the stairs.

"Yes ma'am. I'm the Potion Masters apprentice at Hogwarts."

"Snape? Really? You must be something then. What year are you?"

"6th."

"Is he still a grumpy git?"

"Uh..." she hesitated but grinned. "Kinda."

"Another year and a half to go, huh? You given much thought as to what you'll do after Hogwarts?"

"Well that's sort of why I went down there last night," she said sheepishly. "I always thought I might come work here. Never thought I'd..."

"Be a patient here?" she asked sympathetically. "Don't worry. I'm sure they'll fix you up soon. And when they do, when you graduate next year, come talk to me. I'm Andrea Hawkins, Potions Master."

"Freddie Gray. Nice to officially meet you."

"There you are!" said a loud voice and Freddie looked up to see a frazzled-looking Miriam rushing towards her. "We've been looking all over for you! I was on the verge of calling the Ministry!"

"Sorry mum. I fell asleep," she said, feeling slightly guilty. "I didn't mean to worry you."

"You're ok?" Miriam asked, holding her, looking her over.

"Yes mum."

"Good, that's good," Miriam said, hugging her close. "Now, let's get you back to bed. Thank you Master Hawkins."

"No problem. Nice to meet you, Gray. Take care."

"Thank you," Freddie said and Hawkins smiled and waved goodbye as Miriam led her away.

**Author's Note: Sorry for the delay you guys! I ended up catching a cold – teach me to go out at night without a hat! I'll have another update soon, and we'll soon be back at Hogwarts.**


	24. Chapter 24

Freddie was released from St Mungos a few days later. She was pleased when Snape came to escort her back to Hogwarts and they floo'd directly to his office. She headed straight to the Brewing Room, but Snape stopped her.

"Take your things to your dormitory," he said, pointing to her trunk in the corner of his office. "Get cleaned up, get changed, _then _you can come work on your potion."

"Yes sir," she said obediently, going to her trunk.

"I have your wand," he said, pulling it from his pocket and handing it to her.

"Thank you."

She took her wand in hand for what felt like the first time in months. She felt like a child again, getting her wand for the first time at Ollivander's. Her wand glowed in her hand as it had that first day so many years ago and Freddie couldn't help but smile.

Wish a swish and flick of her wrist, she levitated her trunk. Snape opened the door for her and she nodded to him before heading down the hall.

She passed a group of first years who gasped and flattened themselves against the wall when they saw her. Freddie didn't think anything of it until she entered the Common Room and all conversation came to a halt. Everyone was staring at her. The whispers started and Freddie crossed the room to the dormitory.

_"They say she killed that boy."_

_ "I heard she got sent to Azkaban!"_

_ "Nah, they sent her to the nuthouse."_

_ "She tried to kill Madam Pomfrey, totaled the Hospital Wing."_

Freddie slammed the door shut behind her. She yanked the curtains around her bed, dropped her trunk with a thud, and sat on her bed. Her hands were shaking and she balled her fists against her thighs.

She took several deep breaths, trying to calm herself.

_They don't know what they're talking about. He's not dead. He's out there somewhere in that forest. That or someone took him or he left or..._

She stood quickly and shed her hospital gown. _I can't just sit here and do nothing. _She dressed warmly, put on her Slytherin scarf, and a warm hat that covered her ears. She shoved her gloves and wand into her pocket and started to leave her dorm.

Her eyes fell on Hemlock sitting alone on her bed. She hesitated. A part of her wanted to take the kneazle with her.

_It's a stuffed animal. I'm not one of _those _girls, I'm not a child, but..._

Something in her couldn't leave him behind. A brilliant idea came to her. With a tap of her wand she shrunk the plush so he was small enough to fit in her pocket. Satisfied, she left the dorm.

The stares and whispers started again as she passed through the Common Room. She tried her best to ignore them. She put her hand in her pocket and felt Hemlock there. Holding the kneazle made her feel calmer so she kept her hand in her pocket as she crossed the room and headed up the stairs out of the dungeons.

She was crossing the entrance hall, was almost to the front door, when Snape stepped out in front of her.

"How did I know I'd find you making a break for it?" he sighed, leaning against the door frame.

"I wasn't- I'm not-" she stammered and squeezed Hemlock in her pocket. "I just wanted to go look..."

"Winifred...dozens of people have looked. Teachers have looked. Highly-trained Aurors have looked. The entire centaur herd has looked and they know the forest better than you know the steps of a simple Sleeping Draught."

Freddie looked longingly past him to the snow-covered grounds beyond the door.

"You have a potion to tend to," he said quietly and put a hand on her back, gently leading her back toward the dungeons.

Freddie let him lead her back down the stairs, past a terrified-looking first year Slytherin girl.

"Carry on Miss Ivey," Snape said sharply to her.

"Yes sir," she squeaked, scurrying away from them.

Freddie opened her mouth to tell him, to tell him that everyone thought she'd killed her best friend, then she closed it. She couldn't tell him, couldn't talk about it right now without crying, and he'd already seen her cry far too much for her liking. So she kept her mouth shut and followed him into his office.

She stepped into the Brewing Room and took a deep breath. She immediately felt calmer. The scent of the fire, the bubbling of the cauldron. Being back in the lab was familiar and soothing and Freddie felt better than she had in weeks.

She looked in the cauldron at her Felix Felicis, which was simmering, the liquid thick and golden-brown in color. She walked over to the workstation where Snape had the book open to the current week's instructions. She scanned the recipe quickly.

"Have you done the powdered-"

"Bicorn horn? First thing this morning," he confirmed with a nod.

"So I need cowbane, essence of comfrey, Galanthus Nivalis..." Freddie murmured to herself as she went into the supply closet.

"Dragon's blood," Snape called after her. "Every 6 hours."

"3 drops every 6 hours for a week," she said, more to herself than to him.

"We're two days into the week already," he reminded her.

"I know, I know," she said, coming back out with the ingredients.

"I'll leave you to it," he said with a nod, going out into his office.

#

A little over an hour later, Freddie had done everything that needed to be done to the potion for the time being. She looked at her scarf, hat, and cloak that she'd laid across the back of the stool. She knew Snape wasn't going to let her go outside. She blew out a sigh and peeked out into the office. He was sitting at his desk, reading a book, a tray of tea in front of him. She hadn't even heard him call for Noelle.

"Yes Miss Gray?" he asked, not looking up from his book.

"I've finished for the time being. I've got about two hours-"

"One hour and 27 minutes."

"-before I have to add the dragon's blood."

"Would you like tea?"

"Uh...sure," she said, glancing at the door.

"You are not going out to the forest."

"I didn't ask to," she said defensively, sitting down in her chair. She reached into her pocket and gave Hemlock a reassuring squeeze as Snape put his book down to pour her tea.

"What is in your pocket?" he asked.

"Huh?"

"Your pocket, Miss Gray. You've been fiddling with something all morning."

"Oh," she said and pulled Hemlock out sheepishly. She put him on the desk between them, her cheeks burning.

"It is smaller than I recall," he said, smirking slightly as he handed her her tea.

"It's...silly," she said. "I know it's silly, I'm not usually a stuffed animal sort of girl, but I've found it reassuring to have him with me."

"Him?" Snape repeated, taking a sip of his tea.

"Yeah, I named him Hemlock," she said, and Snape made a noise, hiding his face behind his cup. "Don't laugh at me Severus!"

"I assure you, I am not," he said. "And it's _Professor Snape. _Now drink your tea."

"Yes Professor."

Freddie took a sip of her tea and Snape watched her expectantly. She picked Hemlock up and set him in her lap before taking another sip.

"Well?" Snape asked.

"Well what?"

"Previously when we have shared tea you tell me what blend of ingredients I used."

"Oh," she said and took another sip. She tried. She tried to taste something but since the incident everything she ate or drank tasted exactly the same. She sniffed the brew, fiddling with Hemlock in her lap.

"Raspberry?" she guessed.

"No," he said with a small smirk.

"Sorry," she said weakly, putting the cup down and holding the kneazle in both hands. Snape's brow furrowed and he put his cup down as well.

"What's wrong, Gray?"

"Nothing," she mumbled, squeezing Hemlock.

Snape looked at her with a piercing gaze.

"Don't lie to me," he said in a quiet, dangerous voice.

Freddie tensed and squeezed Hemlock harder. She _had _said that she would never lie to him, she didn't think she could. She knew she couldn't lie now.

"Ever since... Nothing tastes right, everything tastes the same. Tastes...bitter."

"I see," he said, still gazing at her. Freddie looked away. She couldn't stand to have him look at her. She held tight to Hemlock and in her grip he grew larger, back to his normal size. She hugged him tightly.

"Grief can manifest itself in unusual ways," Snape said quietly, picking up his cup and sipping his tea.

"I'm not – can we not talk about-"

There was a knock on the door, startling them both. Hemlock shrunk in her hands.

"Come in," Snape said sharply and Freddie picked up her cup of tea. She nearly dropped it as Albus Dumbledore walked into the room.

"Good morning, Severus. Miss Gray," he said, nodding to her.

"Albus," Snape said in greeting. "Would you like a cup of tea?"

_Please say no, please say no_, Freddie pleaded silently.

"No, thank you, Severus. I was actually looking for Miss Gray. I thought I might find her here."

"Sir?" Freddie said, balling her free hand into a fist against her knee. Of all the things she wanted, having a conversation with the Headmaster was at the very bottom of the list.

"How are you feeling, Miss Gray?" he asked, his voice gentle and kind. She wanted to take his kindness at face value, but it felt fake to her. All she could think of was how he had interrogated her after Daniel's disappearance, how he'd paralyzed her with his magic so she could be force-fed a potion, how he'd forced Snape to enter her mind to view her memories.

"I'm okay," she mumbled, not looking at him.

"Are you ready for classes to start back next week? You feel up to it?"

"Yes," she said shortly.

"Winifred," Snape said sharply.

"Yes _sir_," she amended, forcing the words out. "I'm fine, I will be fine. I'm ready to get back to class, to working on my potions."

"She's brewing Felix Felicis at the moment," Snape said. "I have a list of potions for her to attempt, to test her abilities."

"Very good," Dumbledore said with a nod. "Severus, can I have a word with you please?"

"Go tend to your potion, Gray," Snape said to her.

Freddie got up, taking her tea with her into the Brewing Room. Snape flicked his wand and the door shut behind her. She scowled at the closed door. She put her tea down on the workstation, placed Hemlock next to it, then pressed her ear to the closed door.

"-you to keep a close eye on her, Severus. Meet with her at least once a week and try to gauge how she is handling things," she heard Dumbledore say.

"I'm not a psychiatrist," Snape said and she could hear the scowl in his voice.

"No, but you know loss. You know grief. You can help her-"

"_Albus-_"

"You're her Head of House. It's your responsibility."

"I do not recall that being in my contract," he said sourly.

"It is."

"If I'd known I might not have accepted the post."

"Severus."

"Fine," Snape said. "She is here nearly everyday anyway, working on potions."

"Thank you, Severus. And if she remembers anything..."

"Do you think that she will?"

"You know as well as I do that the human mind is a very complicated thing. I don't know that her memory of whatever happened will ever return...but I would not deem it an impossibility. If it does, if she remembers anything that might help locate his remains..."

"Yes Headmaster."

Freddie moved away from the door quickly, not wanting to be caught eavesdropping. She sat down on the stool and picked up Hemlock.

_His remains..He thinks Daniel is dead... _Freddie felt tears threaten her eyes and she quickly shook her head. _No. He's not dead. He can't be. _

She sipped her tea and was flipping through the pages of the Potions textbook, trying to distract herself, when the door opened.

"Is Dumbledore gone?" she asked, looking up at Snape.

"Yes."

"Good," she said darkly.

"He has to check on you. After something like this...it's his job to-"

"Don't," she said, standing up and walking over to her cauldron, staring at the bubbling brew. She fiddled with Hemlock a moment before shrinking him in her hands then putting him in her pocket.

"Would you like to brew something else?" he asked. "This does not require your full attention."

"Yes. Please."

"Do you want to start with something simple, ease back into it?"

"Do I look like the sort of girl who likes to ease into things?" she asked dryly.

"Very well," he said with a smirk. "Get the book entitled _Boiling Brews _from the shelf in my office and find the recipe for the Mopsus Potion. You can begin immediately."

"Yes sir."


	25. Chapter 25

#

An hour later, Snape was sitting on one of the stools with his book. He'd brought it into the lab to read while Freddie worked.

"Time for lunch," he said, standing up suddenly.

"What? No, my potion-"

"Will be fine for 15 minutes," he said, placing a stasis spell on it. "Come."

"Ugh," she said, grabbing her cloak and making sure Hemlock was in her pocket. "Fine. I hate you sometimes."

"Only sometimes?" he said mockingly. "I'll have to ride you harder then."

Freddie fought to keep the blush from her face as her mind ran away with his words. She walked ahead of him up the stairs out of the dungeon so he couldn't see her face. As she entered the Great Hall she stopped short.

The stares were back, dozens of eyes on her. The whispers started. Then Snape walked in behind her with his most unfriendly of faces on and people stopped staring.

"Go. Eat," Snape said to her. She nodded and walked over to the Slytherin table.

She saw her classmates – Maggie, Christine, the girls she usually sat with. But nobody made eye contact with her, nobody made room for her to sit. She glanced at the Ravenclaw table, subconsciously looking for Daniel, but of course he wasn't there. She exhaled slowly and walked down to the end of the Slytherin Table and sat down.

She put a chicken salad sandwich on her plate and nibbled at it. She sipped pumpkin juice, even though she had never really liked pumpkin juice, but it didn't matter. It was the closest carafe, anything else and she would've had to ask someone to pass it to her. And it didn't matter. Everything tasted the same.

She could hear them whispering about her. Down the table, across both sides, even across the hall.

_"She killed him."_

_ "Covered in blood-"_

_ "Her parents are murderers too. I heard they're in Azkaban."_

_"-think she escaped from the psych ward-"_

Freddie put her juice down and pushed back from the table. She got up and left the Great Hall. She made herself walk slowly, clutching Hemlock in her pocket.

_I'm not running. I am not running. I'm no Gryffindor, but I don't run away. _

But she did. As soon as she reached the dungeons, she ran to Snape's office and sealed herself inside. She collapsed into his chair and put her head down on his desk.

She didn't cry. She didn't have anything left into her to cry. She was angry. She was frustrated. She took a few deep breaths to steady herself then headed into the Brewing Room to focus on her work.

#

Freddie stayed in the Brewing Room for the rest of the day. Snape came back in after lunch but didn't mention her leaving the Great Hall early. She stayed and worked on her potions until Snape sent her to bed.

She had a restless night, tossing and turning. She dozed intermittently but when she did she dreamed of Daniel. Dreamed her was out there, in the forest, calling for her. After a particularly vivid dream, she woke with tears streaming down her face. She sat up in bed and wiped them away, clutching Hemlock to her chest.

She checked her watch. It was almost 4 a.m. There was no one to stop her from going outside. She got dressed quickly, not bothering to be quiet. She didn't care if she woke the other girls. Evidently they were all too scared of her to even look at her now.

She applied her Disillusionment Charm, picked up Hemlock, and left the dormitory. The charm didn't work on the plush kneazle so she tried to focus her magic on making him invisible, they way she had in the hospital.

Try as she might she couldn't get Hemlock to turn invisible, but, as luck would have it, she didn't run into anyone as she left the castle. She crossed the snow-covered grounds quickly, heading for the spot she'd last seen Daniel.

As she got closer, she could have sworn she heard music. She glanced back over her shoulder and saw a dark figure emerging from the castle. She darted into the trees, worried she'd been spotted.

_"Raven hair and ruby lips, sparks fly from her fingertips. Echoed voices in the night, she's a restless spirit on an endless flight."_

No doubt about it. Someone was playing the Eagles.

"Daniel?" she called softly, trying to follow the sound of the music through the trees. She walked aimlessly, listening carefully, trying to figure out which direction the music was coming from but it seemed to be coming from all around her. She clutched Hemlock tightly, turning in a circle as _Witchy Woman _echoed all around her.

"Winifred," Snape said as he stepped out of the trees behind her. He was wearing his pajamas and boots with his cloak thrown over his sleeping attire. He looked tired and annoyed. "Winifred you can't keep-"

"Shh," she hissed at him. "Do you hear that?"

Snape was silent a moment.

"Hear what?" he asked.

"The music," she said. It was growing fainter, as if it were moving away. She started to follow it farther into the forest but Snape grabbed her arm.

"Snap out of it," he said, tapping her with his wand so that she became visible. "There's no music. You're dreaming."

"I'm not," she insisted. "I hear it, it's Daniel, he's playing my song."

She tried to pull away but he held her arm tightly.

"Winifred," he said, exasperated. "You have to stop this. There's no music. Daniel...is not here."

Freddie looked longingly into the darkness. The music had grown so faint now she could barely hear it. Then the song ended and it didn't start again. She looked up into Snape's tired face, his eyes glittering in the moonlight.

"You really couldn't hear it?" she whispered.

"There was no music, Winifred. You were dreaming."

"I'm not! I'm wide awake – I _can't _sleep, how can I sleep knowing he's out here." She looked out into the darkness of the trees and started to pull away.

"Enough!" he said harshly, pulling her back to face him. "That's _enough _Winifred. Daniel is gone and if you keep talking like this they'll send you back to St Mungo's – to the 'loony bin'. Is that what you want?!"

Tears filled her eyes and she tried to blink them away. She looked down at her feet as a hot tear streaked down her cheek. Snape loosened his grip but kept his hand on her arm as she used both arms to hug Hemlock.

"He could still be out here," she said miserably, hating the way her voice cracked. "He's a wizard, he could survive. He could be hiding or – or someone could have taken him! Maybe a werewolf! That would be okay! He can be a werewolf, I'll brew the Wolfsbane for him, every month for him for the rest of his life. He can come back. Or maybe – maybe someone bad _kidnapped _him, maybe a Dark Wizard!"

Snape's hand twitched and she looked up at him hopefully but his face was somber.

"Winifred...the amount of blood on your robes when they found you...there is no way he could have survived."

Freddie wrenched herself away from him, tried to step away but sank to her knees in the snow. She hugged Hemlock, trying not to hear the words Snape had just said. But she was remembering the hot, sticky feeling of blood all over her, the sickening scent that filled her nostrils and threatened to choke her.

"I did not want to tell you," Snape said, kneeling beside her in the snow. He put his hand on her back awkwardly. "I am...sorry."

Freddie didn't say anything. She didn't know what to say but she knew if she opened her mouth she'd start sobbing and never stop. Snape sat with her for several minutes, not speaking either, just holding his hand against her back.

Freddie wished the music would come back. She wanted Snape to hear it, to know that she wasn't dreaming, that she wasn't crazy.

_I'm not crazy, I know I'm not crazy, I'm not. He's still alive, he _can't _be dead. He's somewhere...he has to be..._

"We need to go back to the castle," Snape said finally. Freddie nodded and he stood up.

"I'm not going to carry you this time," he said with a slight smirk, then offered her his hand. She took his hand and he helped her to her feet.

"Come," he said, letting go of her hand.

Not knowing what else to do, Freddie followed him.

"How did you find me?" she asked as they left the forest.

"The floating cat tipped me off."

"He's not a cat, he's a kneazle, and that's not what I meant. Is there like a bell or something that goes off every time I- ...You put some kind of tracer spell on me, didn't you?!"

Snape did not answer, did not even look down at her.

"That's _not _fair, that's got to be _illegal_ or something, you can't just-"

"I _can _in fact. I am going my job-"

"Oh like you were doing your job when you did that – that _thing _in the Hospital Wing where you rifled through my brain?" she demanded.

Snape stopped short in the middle of the snow-covered grounds and looked at her.

"Yes," he said through gritted teeth. "When the Headmaster tells me to do something, I have to do it. Whether I like it or not, it's my job."

"Damn you job and _damn _the Headmaster!" she snarled, the snow rising around her feet in angry flurries.

"Winifred!"

"He thinks I killed Daniel! Everyone does – all the staring and the whispers! Everyone thinks that he's dead and that _I_ killed him!"

Snape stared at her, silent. He continued to stare until the snow that her anger had stirred up had settled.

"_I _do not believe you killed him," he said quietly.

"You don't?" she whispered, looking up at him.

"No. He was your best friend, you loved him-"

"I don't..." she trailed off, then shook her head slightly. She _did _love Daniel, that didn't mean she was _in _love with him.

"I do not know what happened out there, Winifred, no one does. But I do not think that you killed him."

"...You're just saying that to make me feel better," she muttered, kicking at the snow.

"I do not do that. Come. It's cold," he said, continuing towards the castle.

Freddie followed, thinking about what he said. It was true. He wasn't the sort of person who said things just to make people feel better. Quite the opposite.

_He believes me_, she realized, feeling a sense of relief. _Snape believes me. He's on my side. _

They stepped into the Entrance Hall and saw Albus Dumbledore coming down the Grand Staircase, looking cheerful and awake.

"Severus?" he said, raising an eyebrow at them, his blue eyes on Freddie.

"I'm handling it," Snape said gruffly.

The Headmaster nodded and Snape led her down the stairs into the dungeons.

Instead of taking her back to her Common Room, Snape led her to his office.

"Would you like some tea?" he asked, closing the door behind them. "It's almost morning and you have a potion to tend to at 6 – unless you'd rather go back to bed?"

"I'm not tired," she said, shaking her head.

Snape sat at his desk and called Noelle for tea. Freddie stood in front of the fireplace a moment, letting the fire dry her pants that were wet from the snow.

"Earl Grey please, Noelle," Snape said when the elf appeared.

"Yes Master Snape. Can Noelle brings breakfast? We is making it now," the elf said.

"That will be fine."

Freddie stood a minute longer, then sat in her usual chair. She shed her hat, scarf, and cloak and put them in the chair next to her. Noelle returned with a pot of tea and enough food to feed half a dozen people. Snape sighed and thanked the elf.

He poured them both a cup of tea. Freddie took hers with a mumbled 'thank you'. She picked up a slice of ham from the platter Noelle had brought and nibbled on it. Snape took a long drink of his tea then sighed again.

"I want you to promise you won't go out into the forest alone again, Winifred."

Freddie put her cup down and looked at her feet. She didn't say anything. She couldn't promise him that. If there was any chance that Daniel might still be out there...

"He's not out there, Winifred. If he was they would have found him. He's...not there."

"Are you doing that Legilimens thing to me again?" she demanded, face flushing.

"I did not have to," he retorted. "Promise me you will not go into the forest alone again, Gray – especially in the middle of the night."

"Fine," she muttered, and looked up at him. "I promise I won't go into the forest alone, especially in the middle of the night while you're getting your beauty sleep."

He scoffed at her and Freddie smirked slightly.

"Eat your breakfast," he said. "You have a potion to tend."


	26. Chapter 26

There was still a few days before classes started back and Freddie spent all of them in the Brewing Lab, working on a variety of potions. One afternoon when she hadn't seen Snape all morning, she got Daniel's record player from her trunk and took it back down to Snape's office with her. The only record she had was The Eagles one they'd been listening to the day he disappeared.

She thought listening to the songs might make her sad, but when she started the music she couldn't help but smile. She turned the volume up and sang along while she worked on her potions. She even danced some while carrying ingredients from her workstation.

"What is that racket?" Snape asked, appearing in the doorway of the lab. He strode past Freddie to turn the music down.

"It's not racket, it's the Eagles! Don't turn it off, it's helping me concentrate."

"I know it's the Eagles. You're gonna blow your eardrums out and then I'll have to look up a potion to fix you and I don't fancy being your nurse today."

"Hmph," Freddie said, brushing past him to chop up the daisy roots she needed for her potion. "What do _you _know about the Eagles?"

"More than you do," he snorted. "They were popular when I was in school."

"With Muggles maybe."

He paused a beat and picked up one of her daisy roots, twirling it between his index finger and thumb.

"I'm half-blood," he said softly.

Freddie stopped chopping and stared at him.

"But you're Slytherin!"

"Most of your classmates are half-blood but they'll never admit it," he said, shaking his head.

"Was it your mom or dad who was a Muggle?" she asked, assuming he wouldn't answer.

"My father," he said with a sneer. "He was a truly unpleasant man."

"So that's where you get it," she joked.

Snape's face darkened. He threw the daisy down and stomped out of the room. Alarmed, Freddie abandoned her work and went out into his office after him.

"Hey! I'm sorry, Severus. It was just a stupid joke. I didn't mean to upset you," she said candidly.

"You did not," he scoffed, picking up the newspaper on his desk and opening it. "Go back to your potions, Gray."

Freddie hesitated a moment but she didn't know what to say so she turned and went back to her work.

When the record had played all the way through for a second time, Freddie peaked back out at Snape. He had traded the newspaper for a book and he didn't look up at her.

"Yes, Miss Gray?"

"I, uh...I was wondering if you knew what happened to the rest of Daniel's records?" she asked timidly.

He paused in his reading but still didn't look up at her.

"I expect they were returned to his mother, along with the rest of his belongings."

"Oh," she said softly.

_Daniel's mum...does she blame me too?_

She'd met the Muggle woman a few times before, when she was dropping Daniel off at the train station or picking him up at the end of term. She'd invited Freddie to visit, but her aunt and uncle never let her, of course.

"Can I go to Hogsmeade?" she asked Snape.

"Why?"

"There's a record store there."

He put his book down and turned to look at her.

"Have you finished your potions?"

"Yes sir. I brewed a cauldron of Pepperup Potion for Madam Pomfrey, she stopped by this morning but you weren't here. I've got it bottled up for her. My Boletus Potion is done if you want to look at it. And Felix doesn't need more dragon's blood til 6."

"Take your Pepperup Potion to Madam Pomfrey, then you may go," he said, picking up his book.

"Yes sir," she said, hurrying back to get the potion.

She turned the record player off and, after contemplating a moment, decided to just leave it there.

"And Winifred?" Snape said as she started to leave.

"Sir?"

"Stay out of the forest."

"I wasn't going to! I promised," she said, frowning at him.

"Just stay out of trouble."

"Yes sir," she said sarcastically and rolled her eyes as she left his office.

She took the potion up to Madam Pomfrey. The moment she stepped into the Hospital Wing she felt like she couldn't breathe. She remembered waking up in bloody clothes, remembered screaming, being paralyzed by Dumbledore.

"What are _you _doing here?" asked a large Gryffindor boy, blocking her way into Madam Pomfrey's office.

Freddie raised an eyebrow then gave him a scathing look she thought worthy of Snape. She saw the slightest hint of fear in his eyes and felt a strange sense of satisfaction.

"For heaven's sake, Dougall, sit down," Madam Pomfrey said, coming out of her office to take the potion from Freddie. "Thank you Miss Gray."

As she left the Hospital Wing she heard Dougall mutter 'it's probably poison'. She turned to glare at him again and saw Madam Pomfrey smack the back of his head and tell him to hush. Smirking slightly, Freddie headed down the stairs.

_Maybe Madam Pomfrey is on my side too. _

As she reached the bottom of the staircase she found Snape waiting for her with his traveling cloak on.

"I don't need an escort," she said coolly.

"I thought I would accompany you to the village – I need to go to the Apothecary anyway," he said, disregarding her attitude.

"Oo, I wanna go to the Apothecary, too," she said, her tone changing instantly.

"Mm-hm," he said with a knowing chuckle. "Come on then."

Freddie followed him out of the castle and blinked, surprised by the brightness of the sunlight. It was warmer than that the previous days and the snow was beginning to melt. She could hear it dripping from the towers and the trees.

She stood in the middle of the path and stretched, her face turned up towards the sun. She opened her eyes and saw Snape standing there, watching her intently.

"What?" she asked, feeling self-conscious.

"Hm. You look like a plant unfurling in the spring."

Freddie tilted her head and looked at him curiously. That was the closest thing to a personal compliment he'd ever said to her.

"Not all hunched over in the dark like you usually are," he continued.

_That's more like it_, she thought, faintly amused.

"I do not _hunch_," she scoffed, continuing down the path. "If anyone hunches, it's you. Skulking around the dungeons like a bat."

"You hunch. You'll have back problems when you're my age."

"You're not that much older than me. You can't be," she said, shaking her head.

Snape didn't say anything but continued down the path.

"Come on, tell me how old you are," she pestered. "You said the Eagles were popular when you were in school, that had to be the 70s, so...1960s? 1960 what? 62? 63?"

"1960," he said finally.

"Ha!" she said. "So you're...29?"

"I will be 30...on the 9th of January. Please don't-"

"That's next week! Your birthday is next week? How did I not know your birthday is next week?"

"Because I do not celebrate it. Birthdays are a waste of time. An arbitrary celebration of the planet's rotation around the sun on an otherwise insignificant date."

"Uh-huh. So, wait, when did you start teaching at Hogwarts?"

"1981. Enough with the personal questions. You would not appreciate it if the roles were reversed."

'Not true – you can ask me anything. I'm an open book. Wide open. Shoot your shot."

He looked at her oddly and shook his head.

"Do you know what ingredients we need from the Apothecary?" he asked.

"Shouldn't _you_ know that, since it was your idea to go?"

"I'm asking _you_."

"Umm...rat spleens and tails...more daisy roots, I know I used a fair few this week. Um...you know I could've made a list, if I'd known we were going more than 5 seconds before we left," she said practically.

Snape smirked slightly and pulled a folded piece of parchment from his pocket. He handed it to her and she unfolded it. It was a list of ingredients.

"Aha. Always prepared."

"Mm. Like a Boy Scout."

"What's a Boy Scout?" she asked, confused.

"It's a...Muggle thing. Never mind."

They were almost to the village when a group of 5th year Ravenclaws passed them on the path. They were glaring at Freddie before they ever reached them. She glared daggers right back at them and when they passed one of them muttered the word 'murderer'. Freddie whipped around and hissed at them like an angry kneazle. They took off running and Freddie turned back around and continued walking.

"What was that?" Snape asked.

"Hm? Oh...everyone thinks I- they blame me. And they all, they're either scared of me or they hate me...I'd rather them be scared."

"That makes sense," he said, but more like a question than a statement.

"It doesn't," she said with a hollow chuckle. "But...if they're running from me, at least I don't have to hear them whispering. Calling me names. I should just ignore it, but..."

"It is difficult," he said with a nod. "You're young still."

They reached the village and Freddie headed straight for Marley's Records, Daniel's favorite shop in the town. Snape followed her, a little slower, a few steps behind.

"You don't have to come with me," she said, trying to keep the attitude out of her voice. She still felt like he was babysitting her.

"I can wait outside if you prefer."

"I don't care what you do," she muttered.

She walked into the store and a wave of sadness came over her. She walked the same aisles that she had walked with Daniel so many times, nearly every weekend since third year. Until this year. Until her apprenticeship with Snape. Until Daniel started going to Hogsmeade with Heather. Until...

The door opened and Snape stepped into the store. He walked along the shelves of records, looking bored. Freddie tried to shake off the sad feeling and focused on looking at the records. She picked a few she recognized and browsed through some artists she'd never heard of. She picked up one that had a man with blonde hair on the cover. She jumped slightly when she heard Snape chuckle softly behind her, not realizing he had come up behind her.

"Bowie before his lightning bolt," he said quietly, sounding amused.

"Huh?" she said, turning to look at him.

"Oh," he said, brushing past her to select a record off the shelf. He showed it to her. It was titled Aladdin Sane and featured the same man with elaborate makeup in the shape of a lightning bolt across his face.

"Hmm," she said, taking the album and looking it over. "Is he any good?"

"My mother thought so," he answered.

Figuring that was as good a recommendation as any, Freddie added both albums to her stack. She took her records to the check out counter and the long-haired wizard working there recognized her.

"Hey, man. I heard about your friend, I'm sorry. He was a good kid," the man said.

"He was," she said, surprised at the lump in her throat. "He- thank you. Excuse me."

Freddie left her stuff on the counter and ran to the bathroom. She locked the door and stood at the sink, trembling.

_I said 'he was' like he's dead. I didn't mean to say 'was'. He's not dead. He's not dead._

She splashed some water on her face, fighting the hot tears that were threatening to fall.

_The record man said he heard about Daniel. He told me he was sorry. He didn't look like he blamed her. He wasn't mad at her or scared of her. _

Freddie added the record store guy to the mental list of people who were on her side.

_That makes Snape...Madam Pomfrey...and the record store guy._

She left the bathroom and saw Snape standing by the door with a bag of her records. She hurried over to him, hoping she didn't look like she'd been crying.

"You owe me 7 galleons," he said, holding the door open for her.

"Thanks," she said, digging the money out of her pocket and handing it to him.

"Are you...okay?" he asked uncomfortably.

Freddie let out a hollow chuckle.

"That's a personal question," she teased.

"You claimed to be 'an open book' as I recall."

"I did say that, didn't I? I'm...okay. I'm fine."

"Well...good."

It was a minute before Freddie realized they weren't walking towards the Apothecary.

"Where are we going?" she asked curiously.

"Lunch – or, early dinner, I suppose. I'm hungry. I missed lunch."

"Where were you?"

"Busy."

"Hmph. Closed book," she teased.

"Indeed."

"Wait, so, you're going to eat with me? A student? In public?"

He grunted and continued walking without saying anything further. Freddie slowed down.

"I mean, I could go – I could go sit at the Three Broomsticks til you get done eating or whatever. I'm not hungry anyway. There were ice sculptures there-"

"Shut up," he said shortly. "And come with me."

She followed him to the end of the road to a shady-looking place called the Hogs Head Pub. She raised an eyebrow but didn't speak as she followed him into the pub. It was dimly lit and dusty. There were two wizards sitting at the bar, their hoods up. They didn't look up as Snape and Freddie entered the building.

Snape ordered food and drinks from the burly-looking man at the bar.

"We'll take them out back Nathaniel," he said, taking his scotch and Freddie's butterbeer in hand.

Curious, Freddie followed him out of the back door. There were several empty picnic-type tables out back. There was still some snow on the ground but the sun was slowly melting it. Snape waved his wand and dried one of the tables before sitting down. Freddie sat and took the Butterbeer he offered her.

"Thanks," she said. "We're sitting outside?"

"Less likely to be spotted...and you look like you could use some sun."

"Me?" she scoffed. "You're pale as a wilted daisy. Spending all that time in the dungeons."

"Hmm," he said, sipping his drink.

"The Three Broomsticks had giant ice sculptures," she mumbled, fiddling with the cap on her Butterbeer but not opening it.

"Drink your Butterbeer," he said, shaking his head.

They sipped their drinks while they waited on their food. Snape had his wand on the table. He picked it up and twirled it, his face pensive. Suddenly he pointed it at a pile of snow nearby and have it a flick. The snow rose into the air, swirling and hardening until it formed a small willow tree made of ice.

"Wow!" Freddie said, jumping up and running over to inspect it. The ice was hard and cold and it glittered brilliantly in the sunlight. She chuckled, delighted.

"You've _got _to teach me how to do this," she said, touching the delicate leaves of the ice tree.

"I don't teach Charms," he sneered as the door opened and the bartender brought out their food. "Come and sit down."

Disappointed, Freddie dragged her feet back to the table and sat down. She picked at her food, a burger and fries. She ate a bite of burger and three french fries, then sipped her drink, not really tasting any of it. She looked at the ice tree, loving the way it sparkled in the sun. She wished she could take a picture of it. _Maybe I can paint it in Art class, _she thought to herself.

"You should eat more," Snape said. "You're getting thin."

"What're you my mother?" she muttered, pushing her fries around.

A small shiver went through her. She hadn't thought about her mother in ages. She'd been 7 years old when Alexia and Marius Gray had been sentenced to life in prison. She had no memory of her father and her memories of her mother weren't exactly warm and maternal. Mostly flashes of her shuffling Freddie from one room to another, locking her in a room while they met with mysterious people in masks. She'd always seemed to be in the way as a child.

"Come here," Snape said, interrupting her thoughts.

She stood and came around the table nervously. She eyed Snape's half-eaten burger on his plate.

"You're not planning on shoving that down my throat, are you?"she asked darkly, remembering how he had grabbed her hair and forced the Calming Draught down her throat.

"No," he said with a chuckle. "Take out your wand."

Freddie did as told. He turned her around, facing away from him.

"Now," he said. "You've shown an unusual proclivity for wandless magic, bending objects to your will with sheer thought."

"Sir?" she asked, looking over her shoulder at him.

"Your kneazle is in your pocket now, is he not?"

Freddie blushed slightly and her left hand automatically went to her pocket, giving Hemlock a squeeze.

"Yes," she said a bit stiffly.

"I have seen you shrink and expand him at will, without the use of your wand. It is...impressive. The idea here is similar. Imagine what you want to create, let it flow through your wand. Then," he said, taking her hand in his, causing goosebumps to break on her arms. "Move your wand, like this."

"There's no incantation?"

"No," he said, still holding his hand over hers. "Just...focus."

_Focus. With your hand on mine and your breath on the back of my neck? Yeah sure I can focus _just _fine, _she thought to herself. _Okay Freddie you can do this. Focus._

"Ready?" he asked her and she nodded. She focused all of her magic, all of her energy, and Snape guided her wand through the motions. The snow in front of her rose, sort of shivered a moment, then took the form of a kneazle. It didn't solidify into ice, as Snape's sculpture had, it was more of a snow-kneazle.

"Not bad," Snape said, letting go of her hand. "Practice."

Freddie took a few steps away from him, thinking that distance from him, from the enticing heat of his body, would help her focus. It did. The second kneazle she created was frozen solid, the perfect ice sculpture.

"I love this," she said, laughing in delight as she walked around the ice-kneazle. She glanced at Snape to see he was eating his burger but she could swear she saw a smile playing on his lips.

She made several more ice sculptures while Snape continued eating. The last one she concentrated really hard and created a large, intricately detailed cauldron with ice flames beneath it and ice spirals coming from the stop that looked like steam coming off it.

"Now you are just showing off," he said with a small smirk. He finished off his drink and stood.

"You ready to go?" she asked him, petting her ice kneazle once more.

"Unless you want to stay and play in the snow," he said. "While I go to the Apothecary."

"No way," she declared. "Besides – I've got your shopping list."


	27. Chapter 27

Freddie skipped a few steps ahead of him, her heart feeling light for the first time in weeks.

"Slow down," Snape said, sounding mildly annoyed.

She didn't slow down but turned her head and stuck her tongue out at him. She knew she was being childish but in the moment she didn't care. Then she slipped. Her feet went out from under her and she landed smack on her butt.

"Winifred," Snape said, hurrying up to her. "Are you okay?"

"Fine. Ow," she said as Snape helped her to her feet.

"I _did _tell you to slow down," he said, sounding faintly amused.

"Don't laugh at me," she said, smacking his chest lightly.

"Do I look like I'm laughing?" he asked dryly.

"Uh _yes_. You're laughing on the inside. I can tell."

"Oh _you _can tell?"

"Yes, I can tell by your eyes," she said, meeting his gaze. Then she noticed something she'd never noticed before. "Oh!"

"What?"

"Your eyes – they're brown in the sunlight. I always thought they were black," she said softly.

There, standing in the middle of the snowy street in Hogsmeade, she saw Severus Snape blush. It delighted her for the three seconds it took him to get it under control.

"We're going to the Apothecary now, Gray," he said tightly, walking away.

"Yes sir," she said, following him with a grin on her face.

#

They didn't spend much time in the Apothecary. They split the list of ingredients and each gathered what they needed. When they took the items to the counter, the witch working there made a note of what they'd gotten then packaged their items.

"You don't pay?" Freddie asked as they carried the bags out the door.

"The account is paid for by the school," he answered, holding the door open for her.

They started up the path back towards Hogwarts together.

"Did you ever master nonverbal spells in your Charms class?" he asked as they walked.

"Well I don't know about mastered...no, definitely not mastered."

"As I recall, you could not do so much as levitate a feather."

"Yeah," she chuckled. "I managed it a few times, but I really sucked at it. Not like Daniel – he can summon his broomstick from the Owlery. He can even do a nonverbal Disillusionment Charm."

"We are talking about you, Miss Gray," he said smoothly. "I am surprised."

"By what?"

"I have seen you perform wandless, nonverbal spells."

"Oh, that's different."

"How so?"

"When I do that with Hemlock," she said, moving all her bags to one hand so she could pull the kneazle from her pocket. She grew him and shrunk him before putting him back in her pocket. "That's different. I don't think of the spell, I just think of what I want, and it happens. Like when I snuck out of the Janus Thickey Ward-"

"You did _what_?"

"-I focused really hard on making myself invisible so I wouldn't be caught. And it worked. Better than any Disillusionment Charm I've ever cast."

"_Why _did you sneak out, Winifred?" he asked in an exasperated tone.

"I wanted to see where they brewed the potions," she said with a shrug.

"_Winifred_...did you find it?"

"Of course," she replied smartly. "I met Andrea Hawkins. She offered me a job when I graduate. Told me to come talk to her at the end of next year."

"That's good. You didn't tell me," he said, sounding surprised.

"I meant to tell you when I got released. I guess I forgot. Do you know Hawkins?"

"My first year of teaching was her last year at Hogwarts," he said with a nod. "I recall her skills were...adequate. My predecessor, Horace Slughorn, was more impressed with her than I."

"Is she better than me?"

Snape slowed down and looked at her, his face unreadable. She hated that expression. She wanted to know what he was thinking, what he was feeling.

"No," he said finally. "She is not. I suspect that, if you go to work at St Mungo's, with the best of my knowledge in that pretty little head of yours, you'd have her job within two years."

Freddie's face flushed and she beamed. _He just called me pretty_!

"You really think so?" she asked.

"Don't let it go to your head," he warned, bemused. "You are good because I _made_ you good. I took your raw talent and shaped you into what you are now – I am still shaping you, in fact. When I am done with you, when you graduate next year, you will be _great_. A true Potions Master."

Freddie felt warm all over and she didn't know what to say. She could only smile.

"What is your wand made of?" he asked suddenly.

"Um, English oak. Kneazle whisker core. Why?"

"Kneazle whisker?"

"Yes."

"That's...odd."

"It's an old one. Ollivander said it was one his father made, like hundreds of years ago or whatever. He said he doesn't use kneazle whiskers anymore because they produce 'inferior' wands," she scoffed. "He can go suck it."

"G-Gray," he said, shaking his head. "Language."

"Sorry. Why do you ask about my wand?"

"I wondered, perhaps, if it were Dogwood. They are particularly resistant to nonverbal spells."

"Oh, we're back on that."

"Mm. I just find it curious that you have a difficult time with nonverbal spells but not with wandless magic. It's interesting."

"O-_kay,_" she said, not really seeing why he cared.

"I believe I could teach you," he said as they walked through the Hogwarts gate.

"I thought you didn't teach Charms?" she teased.

"Do you wish to learn or not?"

"Uh...what if I'm unteachable? What if I just suck at nonverbal spells and can't learn?"

"You _can _learn. I taught you to make ice sculptures and that was nonverbal. You _can _learn. You are a strong-willed, tenacious, stubborn girl. I can teach you..._if _you want to learn."

Freddie thought a moment, reflecting on how he'd taught her, with his hand on hers, his body close behind her. _I could stand to have more lessons like that_, she thought to herself, trying not to smile.

"Yes sir. Thank you," she said, looking up at him.

"Mm," he grunted, not looking down at her. "Let's get these supplies put away and check on your potion. We can have your first lesson after dinner."

#

As they put the potions ingredients away, Freddie found herself wishing she could talk to Daniel. There was so much she wanted to tell him. About Snape and all the nice things he'd said and done recently, especially today. She wanted to tell him about meeting Andrea Hawkins at St Mungos, about getting a job offer. And about Snape saying she was better than Hawkins.

Freddie sighed softly as she left the supply closet. Snape had gone to stock the Potions classroom and wasn't back yet. Freddie checked her watch, she still had 15 minutes before she had to add dragon's blood to her potion. She sat at the workstation where she'd left the record player. She took her new records out of the bag and spread them out on the table, trying to decide which one to listen to first.

She chose Pink Floyd, another band Daniel had introduced her to. As she put it on, she wished again that she could talk to Daniel. She wanted to know what his absolute favorite band was.

_How have I never asked him what his favorite band is? _She asked herself. _He's played so much music for me over the years. He carried this thing around everywhere, even though it weighs as much as all of our books put together. _

Freddie chuckled softly, then stood up. She walked over to the cauldron and watched her potion bubbling.

Another song started up, slow and instrumental. She closed her eyes as the first verse started and she recognized the tune.

_"So, so you think you can tell, Heaven from Hell? Blue skies from pain? Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil? Do you think you can tell?"_

Her heart felt heavy but the tears didn't start to fall until the chorus. She whispered the words along with it.

_"How I wish, how I wish you were here. We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year. Running over the same old ground and how we found the same old fears. Wish you were here..."_

Freddie was weeping at her cauldron when Snape walked in. He started to walk towards her then stopped. He hesitated, then just stood in the doorway, watching her.

"Are you just gonna _stare at me_?!" she demanded, face red, tears rolling down her face. He raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms.

"I was going to ask if you're okay but you are obviously not okay. I'm not sure – I know that there is nothing I can do," he said stiffly.

"I'm- I'm fine, I'm sorry, I'm fine," she said, sniffling.

"You are not fine," he said, still not moving.

"I know. I don't know what's wrong with me," she said, wiping her streaming nose on her sleeve, feeling disgusting.

"You are upset."

"Clearly!" she laugh-sobbed. "I just – I n-need a minute."

She fled into the storage closet and shut the door behind her. She sat on the floor and hugged her knees to her chest.

_Get ahold of yourself, Freddie, _she told herself sternly. _You can't break down like this, not in front of Snape. You can't break down because you miss Daniel. He's gone, he's not dead. You _know _he's not dead. He's _not _dead, so suck it up and get your work done. _

She looked around the storage closet, wiping away the tears that were still falling. She looked at the ingredients and her mind started matching them up.

_Boomslang skin...lacewing flies...fluxweed...Polyjuice Potion. _

She started to go through the recipe in her head, knowing it would help calm her.

_Add 3 measures of fluxweed. 2 bundles of knotgrass. Stir 4 times clockwise. Brew for 80 minutes. Add 4 leeches. Crush 2 scoops of lacewing flies with mortar and pestle, add 2 measures to the cauldron..._

When she had composed herself, Freddie stepped out of the closet to find Snape adding the dragon's blood to her cauldron. She knew it was 6 o'clock and it had to be done or her potion would be ruined. She blew out a sigh and sat down on the stool.

"Okay?" he said, not looking at her.

"Eh," she responded with a shrug then looked down at the floor. "I just...wish I could talk to him. He's been my best friend for 6 years. I tell him everything. There's so much I want to tell him and I...can't.:"

"I know," he said. "I know how you feel."

"What do you know?!" she demanded, the force of her anger sudden and surprising. She unwittingly released a wave of energy that knocked ?Snape back into the wall and knocked the cauldron over.

"Oh no! No, no, no, no, no!" she shouted, running towards the cauldron to try to steady it but it was too late. The potion was spreading across the stone floor.

"Dammit! Son of a bitch!"

The force of her anger let out another wave of magic that threw the cauldron across the room and cracked the glass ceiling above them.

Snape grabbed her and threw her back against the wall, right before the glass fell and shattered on the floor.

"Stop it!" he snarled, his hand balled into a fist against her chest, pinning her in place. "Stop it, Winifred! You _can't _keep doing this, you can't keep losing control of yourself every time you get upset like a – a child!"

Freddie gasped, trying to take a breath, but the force of him slamming her into the wall had knocked the breath out of her.

"You just wasted _months_ of work because of your little _temper tantrum_! You walk around here like you're the only person in the world who has ever lost someone you – you-"

Tears formed in her eyes and she refused to let them fall but she couldn't breathe. She started to feel panicked.

"Go," he said, backing away from her, his shoes crunching on the broken glass. "Get out of here – _go. Now._"

Freddie took a deep breath. It was painful to do so, her ribs and back hurt. She took a shaky step forward.

"Go!" he said again forcefully.

Freddie grabbed her things, shoved her records and the player into her bag, then fled. She stumbled out into the hallway, slamming the door shut behind her. She took several deep breaths, her chest still hurting. Frustrated, angry, and hurt she kicked the stone wall.

_I hate him_, she thought angrily, limping towards the Common Room. _I hate him! I hate him, I hate him, I hate him. I hate myself. I hate Daniel, for not being here._

She trudged through the Common Room to her dormitory. She dropped her things at the foot of her bed and pulled the curtains shut. She sat on the edge of the bed and kicked her boots off. She stared at them, her hands balled into fists, trembling with anger. She felt like her rage would like the curtains on fire if she didn't calm down.

She tried to focus on a recipe, something to distract herself.

_3 measures of fluxweed...2 bundles of knotgrass. Stir 4 times clockwise. Brew for 80...80 minutes...I fucked up. I fucked up a whole cauldron of Felix Felicis, my _second _cauldron. Months of work...wasted..._

She felt her rage building and she took a deep breath. Then she remembered something. She jumped up and ran to her trunk. She dug through it until she found it – a vial of Calming Draught that Miriam had sent home with her. She uncorked it and took a swig before placing it on her bedside table.

She felt the potion start to work instantly, but her chest still hurt. She shed her clothes and saw the rapidly-forming bruise on her sternum. She scoffed and pulled a set of green satin pajamas from her trunk and put them on. She got Hemlock from her pocket and grew him to full size.

The potion was making her drowsy. She lay down and pulled the blanket over herself. She was still mad but the potion put a damper on it. Mostly she just felt miserable. She clutched Hemlock to her chest and closed her eyes, determined to sleep until she felt better.

**Author's Note: Please review guys Im feeling out of sorts today and could use some words of encouragement. First person to review gets the next chapter dedicated to them and it'll be posted as soon as I get the alert. **


	28. Chapter 28

**Author's Note: Dedicated to MihHale and Katia for their kind reviews! (Had to use Google translate on you Katia and realized I cant tell the difference between Italian and Spanish 😂 Anyway hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Reviews still most appreciated as they light up my life!**

**#**

Some time later, she heard someone saying her name. She fought through the haze of sleep and opened her eyes to see Maggie's head poking through her curtains.

"Professor Snape asked for you to come to his office," she said, looking nervous.

Freddie scoffed.

"Tell him to fuck off," she muttered, then rolled over and went back to sleep.

She woke again a while later. There was no noise just a feeling of being watched. She opened her eyes to see Snape standing at the foot of her bed.

"Bloody hell," she said, sitting up, letting the blanket fall away. "Were you watching me sleep?"

"Don't flatter yourself," he scoffed, then sighed. "I came to...apologize."

"For what?" she muttered.

"For...losing my temper," he said, sitting on the edge of her bed and sighing again.

Freddie scoffed.

"Is this you or _Albus _telling you to apologize, to keep an eye on me?" she sneered. He looked at her, his face flushed in anger. He shook it off quickly.

"You are mad. You are angry with me, you're angry at yourself, at your friend, whatever. That doesn't mean you get to give up. You still have potions to-"

"I don't care," she said, laying back down and turning away from him. "I quit. I quit as your- your apprentice or whatever. I don't care."

"You do not _get _to quit," he said sternly. "I am not going to let you. You don't get to _waste _your talents just because you're upset now. You're – you're too good for that."

Freddie sat up angrily and undid the top button of her pajamas. Snape looked momentarily alarmed, but when she pulled down her top to show him the hand-shaped bruise on her chest his face fell.

"What about that, are you sorry for that?" she demanded.

"Winifred...yes. I did not mean to hurt you. At first – I meant to just push you out of the way of the glass, but I was..."

"Angry," she finished and he nodded. "When I get angry, my magic, it messes things up. Breaks things. I can't help it, I try, but..."

"I know," he said quietly.

He undid a few buttons on his shirt then turned and pulled it down so she could see a dark bruise on his shoulder blade. She gasped softly.

"Did I do that?" she asked, biting her lip.

"When I hit the wall," he said with a nod.

"I'm so sorry," she said, her voice breaking. "I didn't – I've never hurt anyone before when I'm upset. I've broken things but never- never hurt-"

"It's okay," he said, buttoning up his shirt with his nimble fingers. "It was an accident."

She nodded, swallowing heavily.

"So we're even," he said. "Are you ready to put aside this foolishness and get back to work?"

"My potion, I ruined it," she said, rubbing her temples. "All that work, all those ingredients-"

"It happens," he said smoothly. "Potions can be volatile. Remember I told you about my first attempt with the Wolfsbane?"

"This wasn't that and you know it. This was my fault," she said miserably. "Maybe I'm not cut out for this, maybe _I'm _too volatile, too unstable, maybe I should find a different specialty-"

"Stop," he said forcefully, but not angrily. "You – _we _will figure this out. I told you I would assist you with nonverbal spells. I believe I can help you with this as well."

"How?" she asked, clutching Hemlock in her lap.

"I...do not know yet, but I will think of something. Now you – get up and get dressed. We have work to do," he said, standing up.

"...Yes sir," she said, giving him a weak smile.

"I will wait for you," he said, stepping outside the curtains surrounding her bed.

Freddie got dressed quickly, putting on a pair of slacks and a white v-neck sweater. She pulled her boots back on and tied the laces. She picked up Hemlock before pulling the curtains aside. Snape was standing by the window, looking out at the lake. The giant squid was laying against the glass, looking at him with one large yellow eye.

"Daniel calls him Inkblot or Inky for short," Freddie said, waving to the creature, clutching Hemlock under one arm.

"Heh," Snape chuckled then looked down at her. His eyes lingered on the bruise on her chest, half-hidden by her shirt. "Are you ready?"

"I suppose."

Freddie waved goodbye to the squid who winked its big eye at her. She followed Snape out of the dormitory, shrinking Hemlock down to hide him in one hand as they walked through the Common Room. People stared, like they always stared, but Freddie kept her head held high, holding her kneazle tight in her left hand.

They stepped out of the Common Room together and Freddie followed Snape down the hall. She was surprised when they stopped outside of the Potions classroom.

"We're not going back to the lab?" she asked as he opened the door.

"Not tonight," he said, motioning her inside.

Freddie stepped in the room and found it was not what she expected. All of the desks had been pushed against the walls. There were no cauldrons but there were half a dozen dummies targets on them, holding fake wands.

"What's this?" she asked, inspecting one of the dummies.

"I'm going to teach you nonverbal spells and this is how I know how to teach. I learned nonverbal spells by dueling. In a duel, using nonverbal spells gives you a one-up on your opponent that- okay, I need you to put the kneazle down, Winifred, I can't take you seriously with that thing in your hand," he said, rubbing his temples, hiding a small smile.

"Sorry," she said with a sheepish grin. She walked over to his desk and placed the now-normal sized kneazle on his desk.

"Now," he said, clearing his throat. "Nonverbal spells during a duel can give you a split-second advantage over your opponent that can be critical – it can be the difference between life and death."

"Am I, uh, likely to find myself in life or death situations?" she asked, quirking her eyebrow. Then she remembered Daniel, remembered waking up covered in blood, and her face fell. "I just meant, um...shouldn't we start smaller? Like levitation charms, like Flitwick did?"

"No," he said. "Who is your teacher here tonight?"

"You are," she said, straightening up. "Professor Severus Snape, Potions Master turned nonverbal Charms Master."

"Shut up," he said with a small smirk. "Now, are you familiar with Stunning Spells?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. Have at it," he said, stepping aside and indicating the dummy.

Freddie pulled out her wand and focused on the practice dummy.

"Stupefy!" she said determinedly. A jet of red light shot from the tip of her wand and hit the dummy square in the chest, knocking it across the room into on the desks.

"You get that this in intended to be a lesson in _nonverbal _spells, Gray?" he asked, shaking his head slightly.

"Right. Sorry, I was just..."

"Showing off?" he said, smirking.

"Demonstrating," she protested, also smirking.

"Mm. It _was _impressive. Now, do it again – silently," he said, indicating another dummy.

"Yes sir."

Freddie screwed up her face in concentration and focused on the target.

_Stupefy!_

She looked at her wand expectantly but nothing happened. She tried again.

_Stupefy!_

Nothing. She let out a small, frustrated growl and tried again.

_Stupefy! Stupefy! Stupefy!_

"You are trying too hard," Snape said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You're getting too frustrated and getting frustrated won't help you here, you'll only end up doing something you don't intend to."

"Right," she said, exhaling slowly. "Right."

"You have to remain calm, clear, and focused... What usually helps when you feel your emotions becoming...turbulent? You've dealt with this, your 'outbursts' for years now, I'm assuming you've found some way to cope?"

"Ah. Yes, sir. I, um, well, I recite potion recipes in my head."

"Really?" he asked, looking down at her. "That helps?"

"Sometimes. Not always."

"Well, try it. Calm yourself and focus your mind."

Freddie nodded and he took a step back. She wracked her brain for a recipe and chose the Befuddlement Draught.

_Dice three measures of scurvy grass and add to two cups of purified water. Slice four lovage leaves lengthwise and add to the cauldron. Stew for half an hour before adding sneezewort. Stir clockwise once to complete the brew. _

Freddie inhaled and exhaled slowly. She did feel calmer. She took another breath and aimed her wand at the dummy.

_Stupefy! _She thought clearly.

A small beam of red light shot from her wand and hit the dummy. It rattled a bit but didn't fall over.

"Good," Snape said, sounding satisfied.

"Good?" she scoffed. "That was pathetic. If that was a person and not a wooden dummy – it might as well have been a _Tickling Charm_."

"It was progress, Winifred. It wasn't nothing. Keep practicing," he said, walking towards the door.

"Wait, where are you going?" she asked, lowering her wand.

"I'll be back in a minute. Just...practice."

Freddie watched him leave. She shrugged to herself then turned her attention back to the dummies.

#

Freddie practiced her silent Stunning spell until she was able to blast a dummy across the room like she had the first one. Ecstatic, she quickly did the same to the other four. She looked around for something else to practice with and her eyes fell on Hemlock. She didn't want to shoot stunners at the kneazle so she decided to try something else.

_Engorgio! _She thought silently, aiming her wand at the stuffed cat.

Hemlock's head grew maybe an inch and he fell off the desk onto the floor. Frowning, Freddie went and picked him up. That hadn't been what she'd expected. She decided to try again but without the silent incantation.

She placed the tip of her wand to the top of his head and just thought 'grow' the way she did when she did the magic wandlessly, projecting her thoughts and feelings towards him. Hemlock began to grow instantly. He got bigger and bigger until his ears touched the ceiling.

"Ha!" Freddie said aloud, smiling triumphantly. Giddy at her success, she climbed up her monster-size plush. With her wand between her teeth she grabbed fistfuls of plush fur and pulled herself up his leg until she could sit on his back.

She was giggling helplessly when the door opened and Snape came in the classroom. He looked momentarily surprised to be met with a mass of gold fur, then he looked up. Freddie waved, grinning like a fool down at him.

"Why am I not surprised?" Snape said aloud.

"Can you imagine if kneazles were really this big?" she asked happily. "Pouncing all over Muggle towns – eating _whales _for lunch?"

"If kneazles were that large they'd no doubt be hunted to extinction," he replied.

"That's horrible! Don't say that."

"Fine then. Giants could keep them for pets."

"No way! Giants are too rough – Hemlock would claw them to shreds!" she declared.

"Hemlock could not claw anything to shreds. He is a plush toy," Snape pointed out.

"Maybe there'd be giant kneazle reserves, like the dragon reserves in Romania," she said dreamily, leaning forward on Hemlock's giant soft head. She imagined scaling mountains on the back of a large kneazle, pouncing from peak to peak.

"Come down from there. I have something for you," Snape said.

"Or you could come up here," she suggested. "It's really fun!"

"I think not," he said dryly. "Come."

When Freddie didn't budge, Snape pulled out his wand. He flicked his wrist and Freddie grabbed on tightly as Hemlock began to shrink.

"Woah!" she said, then let out an 'oof' as her knees hit the stone floor and she found herself suddenly straddling the small plushie.

"You're no fun," she complained as she got up off the floor, dusted him off, and placed him back on Snape's desk.

"This is a lesson, it's not meant to be fun," he said, putting his wand away. He pulled a small jar from the pocket of his robes and handed it to her.

"What's this?" Freddie asked curiously, unscrewing the lid.

"Bruise cream. For your-" his eyes flicked to her breasts momentarily. "-chest."

"Oh. Thank you," she said, feeling her cheeks grow warm. She pulled her shirt down just a little to apply the paste to the bruise and Snape quickly turned away.

"It's just my chest," she said, faintly amused.

Snape ignored her and set about picking the dummies up and putting them back where they were before.

"You did all these non-verbally?" he asked, still not looking at her. "Before you started playing with your cat?"

"_Yes _and he's not a cat, he's a kneazle – _and _I wasn't playing. I was _practic8ing_," she said earnestly. "I'm 16 years old, I don't _play_."

"You are still a child," he said, finally turning back to her. "You are young. Embrace it."

"Hmph," she said, putting the jar on the desk. Her chest already felt better and the bruise had faded from purple to yellow.

"Come, show me how you've progressed," he said, indicating a dummy.

"Wait – you need this too. Your shoulder."

"I'm fine," he said dismissively. "You are here to learn."

Freddie crossed her arms and gave him her most stubborn look as she shook her head 'no'. He scoffed, shaking his won head. He looked at the door, then looked back at her.

"Fine," he muttered and began unbuttoning his shirt. He slid his shirt down, revealing the dark bruise across his upper back.

He dipped his fingers in the ointment and reached over his shoulder, but his fingertips only reached the top of the wound. He let out a frustrated sigh.

"I can help?" Freddie said tentatively, approaching him slowly. "Let me help."

He grunted and closed his eyes. Freddie's hands were trembling as she dipped four fingers into the paste. She forced her hands to be steady as she touched him, spreading the ointment across his soft, pale flesh. The bruise was tender and warm to the touch. She felt a surge of guilt.

_I did this, _she thought sadly. _I hurt him. Because I lost my temper...again._

"I can't quite reach all of it," she said softly.

His eyes were still closed but he raised his hands and unbuttoned his shirt further. She saw him wince as he slid one arm from his sleeve so she could see the extent of the bruise. It extended halfway down his back, past his rib cage.

"My god," she whispered, tracing the bruise with her fingertips. "I'm sorry."

"Don't," he said quietly, his voice so low she could barely hear it. "It was an accident."

Freddie nodded and didn't say anything else as she dipped her fingers back into the salve. She continued to tend his wound, trying not to freak out over the fact that she was touching him.

_Actually touching him, touching his bare skin, so warm and alive beneath my fingertips and he's not pulling away or yelling at me. I can see his muscles, feel them. His broad shoulders. He's so strong..._

She remembered him carrying her through the snow. She'd felt so safe in his arms. Her hand faltered as the memory made her grow warm. She took the moment to dip her fingers in the ointment again.

_My heart's beating so loud, it's a wonder he can't hear it_, she thought, looking back up at his back. What she saw there gave her pause. The bruise was already fading and beneath the mottled colors of the wound were scars. Old scars, thick, white scar tissue that criss-crossed his back in no real pattern.

_Was he beaten? _She wondered, tracing one of the lines. _Tortured? These scars are old, untreated...he would have been a child..._

"Are you finished?" he asked, still not looking at her but sounding uncomfortable.

"Mm-hm," she said, letting her head fall. "It looks a lot better."

He nodded curtly and slid his arm back into his sleeve. Freddie caught a glimpse of his bare chest – pale, muscular, with very little hair. She'd always wondered what he looked like naked. She didn't like mean with excessive body hair, like her uncle who looked like a bear with no shirt on. But Snape, with the sparse hair across his chest, seemed perfect.

"Let's get back to the lesson," he said as he finished buttoning up his shirt. "Show me what you've learned."


	29. Chapter 29

They spent the next hour practicing nonverbal spells. When he was satisfied with her Stunners, they moved on to disarming and Shield Charms. It took a bit of work but she was able to master disarming the wooden dummies. She had a harder time with the Shield Charms, and finally Snape held up his hand.

"You need an opponent that can actually fight back," he said thoughtfully. "I think it would motivate you to do better."

He pulled out his wand and Freddie took a nervous step back.

"You want me to duel?" she asked. "Against you?"

"Disarming and Shield Charms only," he said with a shrug. "You would not stand a chance were we to _actually _duel."

"Oh yeah?" she said, raising an eyebrow. "If I weren't so tired I'd say we could test that theory."

"Do you want to go to bed?" he asked, lowering his wand.

_With you? Yes, _she thought silently.

"I'm not _that _tired," she said with a grin.

"Good," he said and walked to the other side of the room. He turned to face her.

"Ready?" he asked. "I will disarm you and you will attempt to block me."

"Yes sir," she said, finding his presumptuous tone just a little annoying. She raised her wand, keeping his eyes on Snape's hand.

At the first twitch of his hand, she flicked her wand. _Protego_! She thought determinedly, but nothing happened until her wand flew out of her hand. Snape caught her wand in his free hand and smirked.

"Again," he said, tossing it back to her.

They repeated this, over and over again, for the next 15 minutes. No matter how hard she tried to hold on to her wand, Snape knocked it from her hand each time. She was starting to get tired and was feeling a little dizzy.

Snape hit her with yet another disarming spell and she held so tight to her wand that when it flew towards him she went with it. She lost her footing and fell forward onto the floor. She broke her fall with her free hand and much to her delight she didn't lose her wand.

"Are you injured?" he asked, walking over to her.

"No, I'm fine," she groaned, picking herself up off the floor. "Just tired and...a little light-headed."

"It has been a long day, perhaps you should return to your dormitory," he said, stowing his wand away.

"Maybe you're right," she agreed, walking over to his desk to retrieve Hemlock.

"I always am," he said haughtily, then he paused a moment. "You haven't eaten, have you?"

"We had lunch," she said with a shrug.

"_I _had lunch. You ate 3 french fries and played in the snow," he said. "Go to my office and wait for me."

"I'm fine, I'm not hungry," she protested.

"Do as I say, Winifred."

"Yes sir," she sighed. "Shall I put the classroom back in order?"

"Leave it," he said, shaking his head ."We may practice again tomorrow."

"Okay," she agreed, and followed him out of the classroom.

They parted ways and Freddie headed down to his office to wait. She unlocked the door and went inside. She immediately noticed a weird smell. The door to the Brewing Lab was open.

She lit a fire in the hearth then peeked into the lab. Her cauldron was still there, turned on its side, the ruined potion was curdled and spread across the floor.

"Damn," she muttered, pulling out her wand.

Seeing her mess, her ruined potion, reminded her of her outburst. Her lack of control. She had hurt Snape, had thrown him into a wall.

_I could've killed him, _she thought miserably as she used her wand to clean up the mess. _I could have seriously injured him. He could have died, he-_

Then a thought crossed her mind that made her blood run cold. She dropped her wand and it clattered on the stone floor.

_Daniel...what if I...what if I lost control and..._

She inhaled sharply and bent to pick up her wand. She felt dizzy and let herself kneel on the floor. She lowered her head and took several shaky breaths.

"Winifred?" Snape said from the doorway. "Winifred, what's wrong?"

She didn't look up at him. She felt like she was going to puke.

_I killed him, _she thought. _I killed him. I killed Daniel, I killed my best friend. I killed him, there's nothing left of him. I killed him. I lost control and I don't remember. _

She leaned forward until her forehead touched the cold stone floor. She retched once but there was nothing in her stomach. It cramped painfully and she clutched her stomach.

"Winifred!" Snape said, rushing to her side. He knelt on the floor beside her. "What's wrong?"

"I k-killed him, I killed Daniel," she gasped, teeth chattering. "I-I-"

"What do you mean?" he asked sharply. "Do you remember – did you remember something?"

"N-n-" she retched again, clutching her sides. She shook her head, then pressed her face against the floor. "What if- I l-lost control and...I k-killed him."

"No," he said firmly, putting a hand on her back. "No, you didn't, Winifred. We don't know what happened-"

"But if I got upset, if I lost control," she wailed. "I could've killed him and don't remember, I don't remember anything!"

"No, Winifred. You didn't. I _know _you didn't, I know you," he said softly, insistently. His hand was still on her back and he began to rub her back awkwardly. "You are not thinking clearly. You need to eat something."

She shook her head again, still clutching her stomach.

"_Think_, Gray. There's no evidence that you did anything. There is no evidence that you lost control. There were no broken limbs, no damage to trees. Nothing."

Freddie didn't speak, just dept shaking her head.

_He's lying to me, he doesn't know, no one knows, no one knows, he's dead, he's-_

"Listen to me, Winifred. You did not do this. I know you. Do you hear me?" he asked, still rubbing her back. He moved his hand up her back, up her neck, and she gasped quietly. He stroked the back of her head a few times, then pulled her blonde hair back out of her face. She was surprised at the tender gesture and as he continued to stroke her hair she felt herself growing calmer.

"You did not do anything wrong," he whispered fiercely. Finally, Freddie nodded. She took a deep breath and picked her head up off the floor.

"Okay," he said, getting to his feet, then helping her up. "Come on. You need to get something on your stomach."

She nodded silently and let him lead her out of the lab into his office. There was a tray of tea on his desk and a milkshake with a straw. Snape directed her to her usual chair and Freddie sat down. Her body felt heavy and weak. He put the milkshake into her hands.

"Drink this," he said, walking around his desk to sit down. "It will make you feel better."

"A milkshake?" she asked dubiously.

"It's not just a milkshake. It contains essential vitamins and minerals, nutrients you need for your brain and body to function properly," he said, pouring himself a cup of tea. "Drink it."

Freddie took a sip. It didn't taste too bad. She could taste the chocolate over the bitter taste that everything tasted like nowadays. She continued sipping the drink, looking across the desk at Snape. He watched her back, his dark eyes glittering as he observed her, made sure she was drinking. He supped his tea for a few minutes silently.

"Do you feel better?" he asked, setting his cup down.

Freddie shrugged and stirred her drink with the straw. He stared, waiting for an answer.

"How can I know that I didn't hurt him?" she mumbled. "What if I lost control, what if I hurt him? I hurt _you _today, I didn't mean to but I did. I..."

"Think, Winifred. Think clearly. Were you angry with Daniel?" he asked. "Were you angry with him the way you were angry with me today?"

"No. No, I wasn't but I don't-"

"_Could _you have been? Could you have been so angry at your best friend that you could have killed him?"

"No!" she said immediately, appalled. "...Oh."

"I did not think so," he said smoothly. "Drink your milkshake."

Freddie nodded and continued sipping through her straw.

_He's right. Nothing could have made me so angry that I would kill Daniel. And if I'd hurt him, there'd be something, some kind of evidence. Severus is right. He's brilliant and he believes that I did not hurt Daniel. I should listen to him. _

Freddie continued drinking her shake. Snape poured himself a second cup of tea.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," she said quietly and he scoffed at her.

"You think you hurt me, little girl? That was nothing," he said with a smirk. "So you can stop apologizing."

She smiled faintly, feeling herself grow warm at his words. _Little girl, _she thought and chuckled.

When she finished her milkshake she set the empty glass on his desk. It was the first thing in weeks that she'd actually finished. She felt strangely proud of herself. She looked up and saw Snape giving her a little half-smile that she took to mean he was proud of her too.

"Thank you," she said softly. "For everything."

He grunted softly.

"Go to bed, Gray. Get some sleep," he said, picking up his tea cup. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Yes sir," she said with a smile. She got up and paused when she reached the door. "Goodnight, sir."

"Goodnight, Winifred."

**Author's Note: Bit of a sweet Severus moment there. Tell me you all liked it as much as I liked writing it? :) Also everyone keeps asking about Daniel – what do you guys think happened to him? Reviews please!**


	30. Chapter 30

#

Freddie took a dose of Calming Draught that night and slept deeply until late the next morning. When she got up she felt well-rested and stronger than she had before.

_Maybe that milkshake thing really did help_, she thought to herself as she got dressed. _Severus knows what he's talking about. He's a smart man._

She left her dorm, ignoring the stares as she passed through the Common Room. _Not today_, she thought to herself. _I'm not letting them get to me today. I know I didn't do anything wrong. _

She went down to Snape's office and knocked on the door.

"Come in, Gray," he called from within.

She opened the door and found him sitting at his desk, writing on a piece of parchment with a quill. There was another milkshake sitting on his desk, waiting for her.

"How did you know I was up?" she asked, taking her seat and picking up the drink.

"I know everything," he said haughtily, not looking up from his writing. "How are you today? Are you...better?"

"I thought you knew everything?" she teased.

He 'hmphed' at her, a smirk playing on his lips.

"I do feel better," she admitted after sipping her drink a moment. "I took a Calming Draught before I went to bed last night and I slept well."

"Where did you get a Calming Draught?" he asked, glancing up at her.

"Miriam gave it to me."

"Who?"

"The nurse from the loony bin."

"Ah. The one you call 'mum'."

"Mm-hm," she said, taking a long drink of her shake. "What are you working on?"

"Lesson plans for this semester. Are you ready for classes to start back tomorrow? Are you prepared?"

"Yes sir. I read ahead in all of my textbooks. I think I'll be alright."

"You will be," he said with a nod. "You're a smart girl."

"Thanks," she said, feeling her cheeks grow warm. "What are we working on today? More nonverbal spells?"

"Not quite yet. I have to finish these. Do you wish to restart your Felix Felicis?"

Freddie winced slightly, thinking of all the weeks of work that had gone to waste.

"Maybe I could try something else?" she asked tentatively. "Something different. If that's okay?"

"That is fine," he answered smoothly. "Pick something and let me know what you decide."

He gestured vaguely at the books on his shelf.

"Really?" she asked excitedly, getting up from her chair.

"As they say- have at it," he said, turning his attention back to his work.

Freddie browsed the titles on the shelf, still sipping her milkshake. She pulled a few books off the shelf and took them to her chair. She pulled her chair closer to his desk so she could lay the books out in front of her. She began to flip through them and noticed Snape's dark eyes flick to her several times.

"I can go read in the lab if I'm bothering you," she offered.

"You are not bothering me," he responded, then paused a moment. "Could you drink quieter?"

"Sorry," she said sheepishly and put the empty cup on his desk. "I'm finished anyway."

He picked up his wand and vanished the cup.

"Do you want another?"

Freddie shook her head no and began flipping through the next book. Snape returned to his work.

They spent the next 15 minutes in silence, each working separately. Freddie had found several potions she'd like to try. There was Potion No 7 that was an experimental poison. It would be difficult to brew and she was tempted to choose it, but she'd need venomous tentacula essence and as far as she knew they didn't have any.

_Belladonna Poison would be interesting...so would Amortentia...or Beautification Potion. That'd be fun to test. _

"So," Snape said after a while, setting his quill down and putting his work aside. "What have you decided?"

"I can't choose! Potion No 7 would be cool, but we don't have venomous tentacula essence do we?"

"No," he said, standing up from his desk. He walked over to the shelves and pursued the vials before picking one up. He brought it over and set it in front of her. "Potion No 7."

"Oo," she said, picking up the glass bottle and examining it. "You made this?"

"I did. Do you recall our trip to Knockturn Alley?"

"Most of it," she replied, blushing as she recalled her drunken antics.

"I used the venomous tentacula leaves to make that," he said, leaning against his desk. "What else have you got?"

"Well," she said, picking up one of the books. "Beautification Potion – it would be fun to brew and even more fun to test."

"You don't need that," he scoffed, taking the book from her and closing it.

She looked at him curiously. _Did he mean to say I'm beautiful?_

"Next?" he said persistently.

"Belladonna Poison or Amortentia," she said, pointing to the two open books.

He quirked an eyebrow at her.

"What?" she protested. "It's not like I want to use it, it would just be a challenge. I've always wondered what it smelled like – plus I've never brewed anything in a gold cauldron before."

"Hm," he said, crossing his arms and looking down at her. "If you ruin my gold cauldron, you're paying to replace it."

"I'm not gonna ruin it," she said, swatting his leg playfully. "So, Amortentia?"

"Get to work, Gray," he said, walking back around his desk to sit down.

"Yes sir!"

Freddie went into the Brewing Lab. She got the gold cauldron from the supply closet. Then she started gathering ingredients.


	31. Chapter 31

#

Freddie gathered everything she could from the supply cupboard and began preparing ingredients. She put an ashwinder egg in the cauldron and lit the flames on low. She double-checked the recipe before stepping out into Snape's office.

"I need to go down to the greenhouse and get fresh rose petals," she said, grabbing her cloak.

"You could use thorns," he said, looking up at her, resting his head on one hand, his elbow propped on his desk.

"What?" she scoffed. "You and I both know petals are better, particularly fresh ones."

He quirked his eyebrow and gave her a small smile.

"Wh- you were testing me," she realized and smiled back. "That's not nice."

"That's my job," he responded. "I;'ll walk down with you, in case you run into Professor Sprout."

"I don't need a babysitter."

"No, you don't," he said, standing up. "But I could use a break from this."

He gestured to his work then brushed past her to grab his cloak. She breathed in his scent as he passed her. The herbal scent of potions ingredients. Some sandalwood scent that she thought must be aftershave.

She followed him out of his office and up the stone staircase. When they reached the Entrance Hall they encountered a flood of students who stared at Freddie as they passed.

_Students returning from holiday_, she realized. _They've just gotten off the train. _

She tried to ignore them. She continued on outside with Snape but when they reached the stairs she froze and her blood ran cold.

Heather was walking up the steps, flanked on either side by Gryffindor girls. Her blue eyes were red from crying. Freddie made eye contact with her for a split second before the other Gryffindor girls closed ranks around her, glaring hatefully at Freddie as they ushered Heather away up the steps into the castle.

Freddie took a deep, shuddering breath. Snape put a hand lightly on the small of her back and led her down the stairs.

"Who was that?" he asked, letting his hand fall.

"Daniel's mudblood girlfriend," she muttered.

"Don't use that word!" he said sharply.

Freddie looked up at him curiously. His face was angry for a split second before going blank again. He'd sounded furious. Not like when he usually admonished her for cursing, but genuinely angry.

"Sorry," she whispered.

He didn't speak for several minutes as they continued across the grounds.

"It will get better," he said eventually. "The stares and whispers."

"Unlikely," she scoffed. "They think I'm a murderer."

"It will pass. In a few weeks or months. Some popular boy will start dating some popular girl and you will be old news," he replied smoothly.

Freddie looked at him curiously again. _He's trying to make me feel better. All week he's been...nice. Snape is being nice. Why?_

"What?" he asked.

" 'What' what?"

"You keep looking at me like you want to say something."

"No," she said, shaking her head.

If he _was _being nice to her she certainly wasn't going to screw it up by pointing it out. She liked him being nice. It was weird, definitely, but she found comfort in it. The kind words, the casual, gentle touches. She smiled faintly as she remembered how he'd comforted her last night, stroking her back and hair. Getting the milkshakes for her so she would stay healthy.

_Could it be he actually cares about me? _She wondered. _I know Dumbledore told him to keep an eye on me but this is more than that, this _feels _like more than that. Or am I imagining things? Lord knows I'm certified crazy._

She glanced at him to see he was looking down at her curiously.

"Now who's looking like they have something to say?" she asked teasingly.

"No, just thinking."

"Nah you just like looking at me," she said playfully.

He scoffed at her and shook his head.

When they reached Greenhouse 1 he opened the door for her. Freddie hadn't been in this particular greenhouse since her first year, but it was just as she remembered it. She walked to the back of the greenhouse where the rose bushes were. There were a variety of colors – red, yellow, blue, even black. She examined the black roses, touching the petals gently.

"They're pretty," she said. "I didn't know they made black roses. Does it matter what color – for the potion?"

"Red is preferred, according to Zygmunt Budge," he said, idly walking over to other flowers.

Freddie grabbed a pair of clippers from a nearby workstation. She used her wand to place a stasis spell on a red rose bloom before she snipped it off. The stasis spell would stop her hands from wilting the bloom before she got back to her potion.

She looked over to find Snape squatting next to a bed of white lilies.

"Do we need lilies for something?" she asked, walking over to him. He looked up, seeming startled for a moment, then shook his head.

"No...no we don't need them," he said, standing up. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah," she said, holding open her hand to show him the bloom.

He nodded and followed her out of the greenhouse. He seemed a little morose as they walked back towards the castle. His face was blank and unreadable but Freddie could sense something was bothering him.

"Was it your mother?" she asked carefully, knowing she was pushing her luck. "Did she like lilies?"

"No," he said softly. "...My mother loved roses. She always had a garden in the backyard. It was fenced in, roses on every side. In the spring time when they all bloomed it was..." he shook his head briefly. "He destroyed them once when he was mad and she never..."

He fell silent and didn't continue. Freddie didn't push further. The 'he' he'd mentioned must be his father, she realized. She remembered his reaction the last time they'd discussed his father, when she'd joked that must be where he got his unpleasant demeanor from. Then she remembered the scars on his back.

_If he was violent enough to rip up his mother's roses when he was mad, was he violent enough to hurt him? To hurt both of them, probably. Bad enough that he still has scars all these years later..._

"Have you got everything you need for your potion?" he asked, startling her from her thoughts as they walked down the stone steps into the dungeons.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I think so."

"You _think _so?"

"No, I do. Yes sir."

"Good."

They passed a group of young Slytherins who froze and stared wide-eyed at Freddie.

"What are you doing, Wilson?" Snape snapped at the group.

"G-going to lunch, sir," squeaked one of the girls.

"Go then," he said icily.

The student nodded and they all hurried off. Snape put his hand on Freddie's back and urged her along.

"Thank you," she said gratefully as they continued towards his office.

"For what?" he asked as he stopped to unlock the door. He sounded grouchy.

"Uh...nothing. I'm going to get back to work."


	32. Chapter 32

Classes started back the next day. Freddie had prepared to steel herself against the stares and whispers, prepared to ignore them all and focus on her work. But what she hadn't prepared for was feeling Daniel's absence so keenly. Every class where the seat next to her was empty was like a knife to the heart. It was so obvious, so clear that he was gone, that she couldn't concentrate on anything else.

The only class that she could find her focus in was Potions. Daniel hadn't been in there with her all year so it was easier for not to think about him. To not wonder where he was or what had happened. And no one stared at her or whispered in Snape's class. No one dared. Any time someone's gaze wandered to her Snape was there to bite their heads off and snap at them to focus on their work.

When it came time for her to go down to Care of Magical Creatures on Thursday, she couldn't bring herself to go down. She stood at the top of the stairs, staring out over the grounds, at the Forbidden Forest. At Hagrid's hut where she was supposed to meet Professor Kettleburn and the rest of the class, but she couldn't bring her feet to move. To go to Daniel's favorite class, without him...she couldn't do it.

She turned on her heel and went back into the castle. She hid, walking aimlessly up and down the moving staircases, until she was sure Snape was in class. She slunk down into the dungeons and made her way to the Brewing Lab.

She spent the rest of the afternoon hiding in the lab. She worked on her Amortentia, which still had another 24 hours to brew. She worked on her homework. Every teacher seemed to be piling it on her extra heavy since she'd missed the last weeks of class before the holiday.

She heard the bell ring for dinner and paused in writing her Transfiguration Essay. She thought about going up for dinner. She knew she should. She had been trying to take her meals in the Great Hall but really she just sat there at the end of the Slytherin Table, alone. Pushing her food around her plate. Ignoring the stares and whispers. Trying not to look over at the Gryffindor Table, where Heather was always crying.

Freddie blew out a sigh and set down her quill.

"Noelle?" she said aloud, uncertain if the house-elf would show up for her or not.

Noelle appeared with a pop and smiled toothily.

"Mistress Gray," she said brightly. "What can Noelle does for you?"

"Can you bring me one of those milkshake things that Professor Snape brought me the other day?" she asked. "It's like a nutritional thing with vitamins and stuff."

"Yes, miss, Noelle can do," she said cheerfully and disappeared with a crack.

Freddie wrote another paragraph of her essay before Noelle returned with her milkshake.

"Thank you," Freddie said, accepting the drink.

"You is welcomed, Mistress Gray," the elf said, her large ears flapping happily. "Can Noelle brings you anything else? Some food – ham, turkey, potatoes?"

"No, thank you," she said, stirring the drink with her straw. "I...I'm having a hard time eating since I lost my friend."

"Ohh," Noelle said, her face growing solemn. "Noelle is understanding. When Noelle disappointed the Avery family-" her squeaky voice trembled as she spoke. "-Noelle was given a scarf and set free. Noelle grieved and did not eat for weeks until Master Dumbledore came and offered us employment."

"Oh. I'm sorry," Freddie said. She sipped her milkshake, thinking to herself that she would never really understand house elves.

"Noelle is happy now," the elf said with a small smile. "Griefs is hard, Mistress Gray, but it do get better. We is never quite the same, but...it do get better."

The elf placed her bony hand on Freddie's arm reassuringly.

"When Master Snape lost his friend it changed him. Him has become a different man than him was as a student," Noelle said softly.

"Lost his what now?" Freddie asked, nearly spitting out her drink.

"Oh!" Noelle said, covering her mouth with both hands. "Noelle should not have said that!" The elf grabbed the textbook from the workstation and smacked herself in the head with it repeatedly.

"Hey! No!" Freddie said, snatching the book from her. "Don't do that, why did you do that?"

"Noelle must be punished, Noelle should not tell about teachers to students. Bad," she said, trying to grab the book.

"Stop it, Noelle, it's okay," Freddie said. "Hey, you want to do something for me?"

"Yes, Mistress Gray," she said, sniffling.

"Can you go to my dorm and get my record player and records? They're in my trunk. I'm the bed near-"

"-nearest the window, yes ma'am," the elf said and disappeared with a crack.

_When Snape lost his friend, _Freddie thought. _That's what Noelle said. He lost a friend and it changed him. ...When he was mad the other day – 'you walk around here like you're the only person in the world who's ever lost someone' that's what he said. Now I know what he meant..._

Freddie sighed softly and stirred her milkshake some more with her straw. Every time she found out something more about Snape, it made her care for him even more, made her love him even more.

_And I feel like I've barely scratched the surface, _she thought, sipping her drink. _There's so much about him I don't know, so much I want to know. I want to know everything. But I don't know if he'll ever let me get that close..._

#

When Snape came to his office after dinner, Freddie was working on her homework, listening to the Eagles on Daniel's record player. She turned the volume down and peeked out at him. The surly look was back on his face as he sat down at his desk.

"Are you ok?" she asked, worried that Noelle had told him of her slip up.

He grunted and put a stack of parchments down on his desk.

"Homework from my second years," he said on exhale. "You were not at dinner."

"Are you stalking me?" she teased but when his expression soured further she stopped smiling. "Noelle brought my a milkshake. I wanted to keep an eye on my potion."

"You're lying to me," he said sharply, looking up at her.

Freddie's whole body flushed and she felt immensely guilty.

"I'm sorry. I don't know why I said that. I, uh, I...I just didn't want to go down to the Great Hall," she said with a sigh. "Some days I just can't deal with the stares and the whispers and the – the crying girlfriend, you know? So I just stayed here to work on my homework."

"Mm," he said with a nod, turning his attention to the essays on his desk.

"I could help you grade," she offered.

"Do your own homework, Gray," he said in a bored voice.

"Yes sir," she said and reluctantly returned to her work.

Freddie finished her Transfiguration essay, then plowed through her Charms homework. When she was finished with that she checked her watch. 9:30. She stepped out into Snape's office to find him partly through the stack of essays and looking even more annoyed than before.

"I'm finished with my homework," she said, coming to sit in front of his desk. "I can help you grade."

"I don't need your help," he said darkly.

"I know you don't but I have half an hour before curfew and nothing better to do. Let me help," she said gently.

"Suit yourself," he said, giving her half the remaining papers.

Freddie spent the next half hour marking papers with him in silence. She came across one paper that was barely legible. It was pure chicken scratch.

"What is this, this word right here?" she asked, leaning across the desk to show him what she was looking at. He squinted a moment, considering.

"Ah – _salamander _I think," he said.

"That makes sense," she said, marking the paper. "Can you fail someone for poor penmanship?"

"I have in the past. That is Timothy Purdue – believe it or not, his penmanship has improved in the last year and a half," he said with a small smirk. "If you cannot read his work, feel free to give him a failing grade."

"I am not sorry, Timothy Purdue," Freddie said to herself as she marked a large red D on the parchment. "You should do better. Hopefully you'll learn something."

"Unlikely," Snape said idly, marking something on his own parchment. "Most of them never learn."

"That's just sad," she said, shaking her head. "They should add a new grade to the scale. P for Pathetic."

"There is already a P. It stands for Poor."

"Ah. I've never gotten a P," she said a little proudly.

"Don't be smug, Winifred," he said, but the corners of his mouth twitched.

"I'm not smug. It's not conceited if it's true, is it?"

"Hmm."

"What about you? Did you ever get a failing grade?"

"No," he scoffed, then paused a moment. "I received a D on a History of Magic essay – _once_."

"A D? Really? What did you do, scribble all over your paper?"

"_No_. I was given the incorrect assignment by a classmate. I turned in an essay on Bathilda Bagshot that was supposed to be an assignment on Andres Perkins."

"Damn. Did the classmate give you the wrong homework on purpose?"

"He did."

"What did you do to him?" she asked, knowing that he must have gotten revenge somehow. She certainly would have.

"I hexed him in front of a girl he liked – hoisted him by his feet in the air...not that I am condoning that sort of thing. It was a foolish thing to do. Childish."

"It's hard to imagine you doing anything foolish or childish," she chuckled.

"I was young once."

Freddie picked up another essay to grade and began to scan it for errors.

"Were you popular in school?" she asked curiously, marking an error on the page. He didn't say anything for several minutes and she assumed he wasn't going to respond.

"I was...well-liked among my peers in Slytherin House," he said. "And generally hated by everyone else. I preferred to spend my time alone, inventing new potions, new spells that made me especially popular among my housemates."

"You invented spells?" she asked, impressed. "That sounds really hard!"

"I am quite intelligent, believe it or not."

"Now who's being smug?" she teased and he smirked slightly.

"Like you said," he said, setting an essay aside to pick up another. "It's not conceited if it's true."

"Very true," she agreed.


	33. Chapter 33

#

The next evening after her Charms class, Freddie hurried down to the dungeons excitedly. Her Amortentia would be done within the hour, she just had a few more ingredients to add. Snape was at his desk when she entered the office.

"Hey," she said as she dumped her bag into her usual chair then headed straight for the Brewing Lab.

The whole room smelled amazing. She breathed deeply as she gathered what she needed to complete the brew. Peppermint oil and pearl dust. She added two measures of pearl dust to the silver brew and stirred it in. She carefully added 3 drops of the peppermint oil and reduced the flames under the cauldron.

The potion looked exactly as described in the textbook, a shimmering silver with a mother-of-pearl sheen. Spirals of steam came from the cauldron and Freddie stood there, breathing it in. It was an intoxicating scent that made her feel calmer than she could ever remember being. An earthy, herbal scent, like freshly picked fluxweed.

"Smells like you successfully completed the Amortentia," Snape said from beside her.

Freddie looked up, feeling a little light-headed. She hadn't even noticed he'd joined her in the lab.

"Mm-hm," she said, inhaling deeply again.

"What do you smell?" he asked, also breathing deeply.

"If I tell you, then you tell me," she said.

"Fair enough," he agreed.

"I smell earth...like freshly-picked herbs. Sandalwood. And snow, freshly fallen snow and ice."

He nodded silently and took a slow, deep breath.

"I smell tea leaves," he said. "And a metallic scent, like how an empty pewter cauldron right before you start a new potion. And there are floral scents, too. Honeysuckle and-" he paused a moment. "-lilies."

Freddie felt suddenly warm as she realized that honeysuckle essence was the scent she wore as perfume. _Does he know that? _She wondered.

"I'm feeling a little light-headed," she admitted with a chuckle.

"It can have that effect. We should vanish it, now that it's complete."

"We should," she agreed, but neither of them moved. They stood together for several minutes, just breathing in the scent.

Finally, Snape seemed to shake it off. He pulled out his wand and Freddie watched wistfully as the potion disappeared. She sighed softly as the wonderful scent faded, leaving her with a strangely hollow feeling.

"Come," he said to her. "I'll have Noelle bring us some tea."

Freddie nodded and followed him out of the lab.

"Do you have homework you need to do?" he asked her once Noelle had brought their tea.

"It's Friday," she said with a shrug. "I have time."

"If you complete you assignments tonight, we will have more time to practice nonverbal spells this weekend. You may do your work here if you like, while I grade your class's homework I collected this morning."

"Okay," she agreed, digging her Charms textbook from her bag. She pulled her chair closer to his desk so she would have space to work.

"Are you still going to work with me on controlling my outbursts?" she inquired.

"Yes. I am still considering the best approach for your issue. I've been doing some research."

"For me?" she asked, surprised.

"Yes."

"You don't have to do that. I don't want to cause you any extra work, or- or stress," she said nervously. "I just...I don't want to hurt anyone else by mistake."

"I know," he said quietly. "Do not worry. Focus on your homework, Winifred."

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

#

On Sunday morning they practiced nonverbal hexes and jinxes until lunchtime. When he asked her if she wanted to come back after lunch, Freddie hesitated.

"I have something I need to do," she said. "Would after dinner be okay?"

"I told you to finish your homework on Friday."

"I did," she said defensively. "This is something else."

"You're not going into the forest again, are you?" he asked, looking at her with a piercing gaze.

"_No_," she said. "No, I promised. I just have something to do, okay?"

"Fine," he agreed. "I...trust you."

"Good," she said with a smile. "You should."

Freddie left Snape's office, smiling pleasantly to herself. Tomorrow was Snape's birthday and she hadn't forgotten. Despite his insistence that it was irrelevant, she planned to get him something. She didn't know what exactly but she knew she wanted to get him _something_.

She stopped by her dorm and got her hat and scarf before heading outside. She started down the path to Hogsmeade, ignoring the students who glared at her as she passed or ran away from her. She kept her hand on Hemlock who was hidden away in her pocket as always.

She hummed to herself as she walked along the path, intermittently mumbling the lyrics to _Take it Easy _under her breath. She was almost to the village when she spotted the tall, bearded figure of Albus Dumbledore walking towards her. She glanced around her, but there was nowhere to hide, no way to avoid him. She sighed deeply, hoping that he would just say hello and be on his way.

_No such luck, _she thought as he slowed down.

"Good afternoon, Miss Gray. How are you?" he asked cheerily.

"I'm, uh, fine, Headmaster. How are you?"

"Fantastic," he answered, his blue eyes twinkling. "It's such a lovely day for a walk, don't you think? It's going to be a beautiful Spring this year."

"Yes sir."

He didn't continue walking, just smiled, like he was waiting for her to say something.

"I was just, uh, heading into the village to- well, it's Professor Snape's birthday tomorrow, sir."

"Yes, I know. You're off to find him a gift?"

"Yes sir. He's been really, well... I just wanted to do something nice for him. He said he doesn't celebrate birthdays."

"Oh he hates them," he said cheerfully. "He complains every year when I give him a gift. He doesn't usually tell people his birthday, but I've known him most of his life."

"He mentioned it the other day. What did you get him?" she asked curiously.

"The same thing I always get him," he said, producing a bottle of scotch with a red bow on it.

"Ah," she said with a nod. "Well, I'm going to see what I can find in the village."

"Good luck, Miss Gray."

Freddie spent the next few hours wandering in and out of the shops in Hogsmeade. She spent a good deal of time in the Apothecary. She could get him potion ingredients, something he didn't normally keep in stock, but that didn't feel right. She wanted something more personal.

It was getting late when she found herself in an antique shop. She browsed the shelves absently. Suddenly a flash of green caught her eye at the back of the shop. She felt drawn to it and walked over to a dusty wooden cabinet filled with curios. There on the top shelf was an antique tea set.

It was emerald green with silver inlaid in a web-like pattern. There was a pot and two matching cups and saucers. It was perfect.

She paid for the set and the kindly old witch at the counter wrapped it up for her.

"I was worried no one would every buy this old set," the witch said in a crackly voice. "Most sets have at least four cups. This one may have at some point, but as long as its been here its been incomplete."

"That's okay," she assured the woman. "My...friend who I'm buying it for, he's a bit of a longer. Not many house guests who join him for tea."

She chuckled quietly.

"Well, I hope he enjoys it, dear," the witch said.

"Me too. Thank you."

Freddie planned to take her gift to her dorm as soon as she got back to the castle. She was walking past the greenhouses when she had another idea. She smiled to herself and looked around to make sure no one was watching before she snuck into Greenhouse 1.

After stowing her gifts in her trunk, Freddie headed down to Snape's office. She was smiling when she entered the room to find Snape sitting at his desk. He looked annoyed.

"You okay?" she asked, sitting down across from him. "More essays to grade?"

"Did you eat dinner?" he asked, not looking up at her.

"Uh...no."

"Go eat dinner, then you may return and get started on brewing Chelidonium Miniscula. I have left the recipe for you on the workstation," he said coolly.

"W- what's wrong?" she asked, frowning slightly. "Why can't Noelle just bring-"

"Go eat dinner, Miss Gray," he said shortly.

"...Fine," she said, getting up from her chair. "I'll see you after."

Freddie felt confused as she made her way up to the Great Hall. Snape was mad, clearly. _But is he mad at me? Or just mad in general?_

Freddie tried not to fret over Snape and his mood swings as she sat at the end of Slytherin table and picked at her dinner. When she felt she'd been there a significant amount of time, she headed back down to the dungeons, hoping Snape's mood had improved.

It hadn't.

She spent the rest of her evening working on her potion alone. Any time she tried to talk to Snape, his replies were short and snarks. Eventually she gave up trying to get him out of his mood and just focused on her work.

At 10 minutes til curfew, she put a stasis spell on her potion and cleaned up her workstation. She walked out into Snape's office and got her bag and cloak off the chair.

"Goodnight Professor," she said as she headed for the door. "I hope you feel better tomorrow, whatever your problem is."

"Miss Gray," he said sharply and she paused with her hand on the door. "...Goodnight."

"Goodnight," she repeated and headed to bed.


	34. Chapter 34

Freddie had set the alarm on her watch to wake up early the next morning, long before anyone else in her dorm. She dressed in her school robes and took a moment to sit on her bed and braid her blonde hair in one long braid down her back. She put her gifts for Snape into her school bag carefully and quietly left her Common Room.

She felt clever and sneaky and altogether pleased with herself as she walked down the corridor to Snape's office. She planned to leave her gifts on his desk and be back in her Common Room long before he woke.

She undid the enchantment that locked his office and pushed the door open slowly. It was dark within the room and she used her wand to nonverbally light a few candles, giving her just enough light to see by. She took the tea set from her bag and placed it on his desk. It was wrapped in plain brown paper and, after thinking a moment, she conjured a small black bow to go on top.

Next, she carefully removed the dozen black roses she'd stolen from the greenhouse yesterday. She'd placed a stasis spell on them at the time but they were already beginning to look not as fresh as they had when she'd first cut them. She conjured a simple glass vase and put them in it, arranging them carefully. She put the tip of her wand to the vase and whispered "_Augementi_" so that it filled with water.

Finally, she pulled the last item from her bag – a single white lily she had been extra careful with. She'd put as many protective enchantments as she could think of on the delicate little flower and it still appeared freshly picked. She arranged it carefully among the black roses until she was satisfied it was perfect. She stood back to admire her work – the pure white lily stood in stark contrast against the sea of black roses. She picked up her bag and turned to go.

"What are you doing?" asked a gruff voice and she jumped slightly. She turned to see Snape standing in the now-open door that led into his quarters. His hair was mussed from sleep. He wore a long-sleeved white sleep shirt with the top two buttons undone and she could see part of his muscled chest. Her eyes wandered down to the matching bottoms he wore and her heart stopped, then began to race – she could see the outline of what appeared to be his semi-hard cock.

"Answer me, Miss Gray," he said. His voice was stern but sounded smooth as honey to her ears.

"What?" she asked, biting her lip slightly as she forced her gaze to his face.

"_Why _are you sneaking around my office at 5 in the morning?" he asked impatiently, crossing his arms.

"Oh, I- uh – um-"

"Did someone slip you a Babbling Beverage?" he sneered.

Freddie shook her head. _Get a grip! _She told herself mentally.

"N- Happy birthday," she said weakly, pointing to his desk.

He scoffed loudly, then turned on his heel and went back into his room. He left the door open. Freddie stood there, hesitating, not sure if she should stay or go...or go in.

She desperately wanted to know what the inside of his quarters looked like, almost as much as she desperately wanted to see _more _of what she had just spotted in his pants.

Biting her lip still she took two steps closer to Snape's room and peeked inside, but didn't go in. She gasped softly at what she saw. The room was lit by the same green glow as the window in her dorm, only better. Three walls of his room looked out under the lake, from ceiling to floor.

Snape was standing at a large four post bed in the corner of the room, his back to her as he pulled on a black terrycloth robe. Freddie looked around the room quickly, trying to commit it to memory, before stepping back out to wait.

His bed was in the corner and much like her own it had dark curtains that could be drawn around it. Near the door there had been a black leather couch with a green blanket draped across the back. There was a table in front of the couch, loaded down with books, a stack of newspapers, and a few empty cups. The whole room had smelled like him.

When Snape stepped out again he had a black robe over his pajamas, the sash tied around his waist. Much to her disappointment, the robe now covered the intriguing bulge in his pants.

"I told you I do not celebrate birthdays," he said, sitting down at his desk.

"I know," Freddie said as she sat down cautiously. "I just...I wanted to do something nice for you. You've been so-" she started to say 'nice' but thought better of it. "-You've been helping me a lot recently and I just...wanted to sort of thank you, I guess. I was just going to leave them and go back to my Common Room. I didn't mean to wake you up."

"You did not," he said and his eyes fell on the flowers in front of him. His face seemed to soften slightly, or maybe it was a trick of the dim light. "I was having trouble sleeping," he said softly.

"I'm sorry," Freddie said quietly and he looked up at her quickly, as if he'd forgotten she was there.

"Shall I open this now or wait until you scurry off back to your dorm?" he asked with a small smirk.

"You can open it now if you want to," she said, feeling her cheeks grow warm. "Or I can leave, if you prefer."

"I'm up now," he said and began to unwrap the brown paper. Freddie bit her lip anxiously as he removed the tea set and placed it on his desk. He looked at it, tracing the sliver pattern with one finger.

"...Thank you," he said quietly, his voice strained.

"You're welcome. ...If it makes you feel better, you could pretend it's a belated Christmas gift? I owe you one anyway," she said, pulling Hemlock from her pocket and fiddling with him in her lap.

"Hm. Would you like some tea? May as well put it to good use," he said.

"Yes, please," Freddie said, trying not to sound too eager. She was pleased he liked his gift and wanted to use it. She smiled to herself as he summoned Noelle and she grew Hemlock to his full size in her lap and gave him a squeeze.

"Good morning, Master Snape," Noelle said as she appeared. "Mistress Gray."

"Good morning," Freddie greeted.

"I have a new tea set, Noelle," Snape said to the elf. "I think we will drink brew number 47."

"Yes Master Snape," Noelle said with a slight bow before disappearing with a crack, along with the tea set.

"Number 47?" Freddie asked curiously. "Just how many blends of tea have you created?"

"At least 47," he said with a small smirk.

Freddie chuckled and fiddled with her kneazle's ears. She was glad he seemed to be in a better mood today. She wondered what had caused his pissy mood yesterday but she wasn't stupid enough to bring it up and ruin it.

They didn't talk as they waited on Noelle to return with the tea. Snape organized some papers on his desk, a sleepy look on his face that Freddie found all too adorable. Noelle returned with the tea set on a silver tray and Freddie was surprised to see the pot was glowing green.

"Is a beautiful set, Master Snape," Noelle said as she placed the tray on his desk. "The glass glows when a hot liquid is inside."

"Apparently," Snape said. "Thank you, Noelle, that will be all."

"Yes sir," the elf said, then disappeared with a crack.

Snape picked up the teapot and poured tea into both cups. As the tea filled the cups they began to glow as well. Freddie leaned forward and took the steaming tea cup. She looked at the dark red brew inside and sniffed it curiously. She took a sip, weighing the flavor on her tongue, trying to figure out what herbs it could be. She knew he liked it when she identified his blends.

"Hibiscus?" she asked and he cracked a small smile and nodded. "And lemon?"

"Correct, Miss Gray," he said before taking a sip of his tea. "...How would you like to have a duel this evening?"

"With you?" she asked, surprised.

"I see no one else here."

"Why?"

"You have made remarkable progress on your nonverbal spells. It is an opportunity to put your skills to the test and for me to practice as well. Do you accept?"

"Of course," she said with a grin. "And don't think I'm going to go easy on you cuz it's your birthday."

He looked at her over his teacup, his eyebrow quirked.

"You do not stand a chance, little girl."

A shiver went through her and Freddie smiled before taking another drink of tea. She loved it when he called her that. Snape continued to watch her, an intense look in his dark eyes. She felt herself grow warm under his gaze. She wondered, not for the first time, what he was thinking.

_Almost like he wants to hex me...or fuck me, _she thought and swallowed heavily.

"I'm going to check on my potion," she said, tucking Hemlock under her arm as she stood.

"You do that," he said and sipped his tea as he watched her walk away.

#

Freddie worked on the Chelidonium Miniscula for a while, sipping her tea as she worked. When she finished her cup she went back out into Snape's office to refill it. He wasn't at his desk but the teapot was still there. She refilled her cup and it began to glow again. She glanced to the bookcase that concealed Snape's quarters. She assumed he was in there, probably getting dressed for the day. He'd taken his cup of tea with him. She spared a moment to fantasize about what he could be doing on the other side of the door. She smiled to herself and went back to her work.

Her potion was finished within an hour. The finished product was golden yellow in color. She extinguished the fire beneath the cauldron and cleaned up her workstation.

"Time for breakfast," Snape said, appearing in the doorway fully dressed.

"I finished my potion," she said, turning to look at him. "And my tea."

"Congratulations," he said dryly.

"What should I do with the potion?"

"Bottle it and leave it on the table," he said. "Then come down to breakfast."

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

Freddie sat alone at breakfast as usual. She picked at her food disinterestedly, thinking more about her upcoming duel with Snape. She acted cocky but her nonverbal spells were still limited. Snape was a grown wizard, a former Death Eater. He knew more spells, hexes, curses...Dark magic she could only dream of.

He wouldn't hurt her, of course. She knew that.

_ But what if I accidentally hurt him? _She thought anxiously. _What if we're dueling and I lose control of my magic again?_

The bell rang and Freddie sighed softly. She got up from the table and glanced towards the Ravenclaw table.

_I wish Daniel were here to give me some advice, _she thought morosely. She grabbed her bag and headed towards the dungeons for Potions class. As she clambered down the stairs she tried to imagine what Daniel would say if he were here. He probably wouldn't like the idea of her dueling with Snape. But of course he knew she'd do it anyway. Then it was like she could hear Daniel's voice in her head. _'Well he's a grown man. He can take care of himself. You're not going to hurt him. But if he hurts you, I'll hex him into next week!'_

Freddie smiled slightly to herself as she entered the classroom and took her seat.

Throughout the class, Freddie continued to think about the duel. She wished she had more time to practice. She had a break before lunch, she could practice then, but she wasn't sure where she could go. There were too many breakable objects in the Brewing Lab. Too many people in her dorm or Common Room.

_Maybe somewhere outside, _she thought. _...I wish Daniel were here. He'd help me practice. _

When the bell rang at the end of class, Freddie lingered until her classmates were gone. She approached Snape's desk with an air of false confidence.

"So," she said, leaning across his desk. "What time do you want to duel?"

He looked up at her, an interesting gleam in his dark eyes.

"Be here after my last class ends this afternoon."

"5 o'clock?"

"5:30," he said decisively.

"You need time to warm up?" she teased and he scoffed at her. "How long has it been since you dueled? You're so old, you might need time to practice."

His eyes darkened, sending a shiver through her.

"You _will _regret being so cocky, Miss Gray," he said in a low voice and she bit her bottom lip. They shared an intense look, then he stood and she fought the urge to shrink away from him. "Go to class, Winifred, or you will be late. I will see you at 5:30."

"Yes sir," she said with a small smirk, then turned to go. As she walked away she heard him exhale sharply. She glanced back at him to see him watching her still. She smiled. "See you at 5:30."


	35. Chapter 35

After Transfiguration Freddie headed out onto the grounds to look for a place to practice. The ground still had snowy slush on it, though the days were getting warmer. There were very few students outside. This time of year they preferred to do their studying indoors.

She found a spot near the Quidditch pitch to practice, away from the view of the castle. She stared at the trees of the Forbidden Forest for several minutes, thinking about Daniel. She shook her head and turned away from the woods. She had promised Snape. Besides, she had spells to practice.

She used her wand to create a target, a dummy made of ice. She smiled briefly at her handiwork, then began practicing her nonverbal spells. She spent the rest of the morning practicing silent Stunners, disarming jinxes, and any other spells that came to mind that could be used to disarm or defeat her opponent.

She skipped lunch so she could continue practicing, but when the bell rang after lunch she had to inside for Charms class. She spent the class period practicing wand movements beneath her desk and fantasizing about her upcoming duel.

She had another break after Charms. She started to go back outside to practice, but stopped by her dorm first. She poured over her spell books and scribbled down a few spells she thought could be useful. She took her scrap of parchment outside with her and spent the rest of the time practicing until her watch beeped at 5:15.

A thrill of excitement and anxiety went through her. She blasted her ice dummy to bits one last time and smirked to herself. She stowed her wand away and headed back inside.

She stopped by the bathroom on her way to the potions classroom. She checked her reflection in the mirror. Her blonde hair was a bit frazzled so she undid her braid. She dug her hairbrush from her bag and ran it through her hair a few times before re-braiding it. She stared at herself in the mirror for a minute, thinking how different she looked. Not just the change in hair color. Her face looked thinner, her cheekbones more sharp and defined. She looked older somehow, as if years had passed in the last month. She touched her face gently, feeling as if she were someone else entirely.

She shook her head slightly and looked away. She dug her potions kit from her bag and got out the essence of honeysuckle. She dabbed it on her wrists and behind her ears, smiling slightly as she remembered Snape telling her what Amortentia smelled like to him.

She put her things away and left the bathroom. She walked down to Snape's classroom. She tried to peek through the window but found he had cast some sort of spell on the glass so it wasn't see through. A wise decision.

She knocked on the door and a shiver went through her when his low, silky voice told her to enter. She opened the door to find the classroom similar to how it looked when he taught her nonverbal spells – all the desks were pushed to the walls, only this time there were no wooden practice dummies.

"Good afternoon, Miss Gray," he said smoothly. He was leaning against his desk, facing her, his arms crossed.

"Professor Snape," she greeted, moving past him to place her bag on his desk.

"Are you prepared? Have you...practiced?"

"Yes sir," she said, feeling her cheeks grow warm. "During both of my free periods."

"Those are for studying and homework, Miss Gray."

"Technically I _was _studying...sir."

"Very well," he said, crossing the room. He locked the door and pulled out his wand. "_Muffliato_."

"What was that?" Freddie asked as he turned back to face her.

"A spell," he said. "Of my own invention. Keeps sounds from being heard by passers by."

"Brilliant," she said and he smirked slightly.

"I thought so," he said. "Have you ever participated in a Wizard's Duel, Miss Gray?"

"No, sir, but I've seen a few."

"Are you familiar with the rules?"

"Yes, sir, although I know they can vary. No illegal curses, I'm assuming."

"Obviously. We are not dueling to the death. No lethal spells."

"Obviously," she repeated, mimicking his tone and giving him a smirk.

"Are you ready?" he asked, raising his wand.

"Ready, sir," she said, straightening up and raising her wand.

They met in the middle of the room and bowed low to one another. Their eyes met as they rose and returned to opposite sides of the room.

"1...2...3," Snape said.

Freddie stood, wand at the ready, waiting for him to make the first move, but he just stood there looking bored.

"I am waiting, Miss Gray. Or have you given up already?" he taunted.

Freddie flicked her wand, firing three consecutive Stunners which he deflected with a barely perceptible movement of his wand.

_I am vastly out-powered here_, she realized but shook it off and redoubled her efforts.

_Reducto! _She thought, firing a spell at his Shield Charm. _Bombarda! Reducto!_

She kept it up, repeating the two spells to weaken his Shield Charm. She put everything she had into her spells until his shield finally broke under her onslaught. His eyes lit up and he took a step forward. Freddie took the opportunity to fire another silent Stunner, but he side-stepped it easily. Before she could fire another spell she was hit with a beam of light that paralyzed her. She hit the ground with a thud and found she couldn't move.

_A Body Bind Curse_, she realized. Luckily she still had her wand in her hand. _Finite_, she cast silently, canceling the effects of the spell. Snape was walking towards her, assuming she was still paralyzed. Freddie rolled on her side and surprised him with a Trip Jinx.

They were both back on their feet in an instant. Freddie blocked his next two spells with a Shield Charm of her own. She tried a Disarming spell but ht held tight to his wand, withstanding the effects of the spell.

He flicked his wrist and Freddie ducked as a Stunner shot towards her head. As she came back up she pointed her wand at him. _Ventus! _She thought, sending a strong gust of wind that blasted his hair and robes.

"Impressive," he commented and Freddie threw up another Shield Charm as he fired a spell. "But ineffective."

They circled one another, each firing and blocking spells from the other. Freddie managed to hit him with an Impediment Jinx that slowed his movements. She thought it would give her an advantage but he still managed to block every spell she threw at him.

She started to get frustrated as the duel dragged on and she had to calm herself down.

_Draught of Peace recipe, _she thought. _Go. Add powdered moonstone to three measures of – Protego! - purified water. Stir – Protego! - until the potion turns blue. Protego! Add more powdered – Protego! -moonstone until the potion – Protego! - turns purple – Protego!_

"You are distracted," Snape said, holding his wand still. "You're holding back. Why?"

"I-" she paused a beat and took a deep breath. "I'm trying not to get frustrated. I don't want to lose control and- and hurt you."

He crossed the room in three strides and gazed down at her, his black eyes glittering. He was only a half foot taller than she was but in that moment he seemed to tower over her.

"You don't scare me, little girl," he said with a faint sneer. "Bring it on."

Freddie stared back up at him, her mind working quickly. Without breaking eye contact, she hit him with a disarming spell that took him by surprise. His wand flew out of his hand and Freddie grabbed it triumphantly. She danced out of his reach as he made a grab for his wand.

"Uh-uh-uh," she said teasingly. "No physical contact, Professor. It's against the rules of a duel."

His face turned red and he looked angry as she pranced around the room with his wand. He held out his hand and his wand was forcefully jerked from her grasp. Freddie gasped and ducked as he immediately shot at Stunner at her.

They continued circling, each blocking the others spells. Freddie's mind raced, trying to come up with a strategy. Eventually she knew what she had to do. She held back her Shield Charm and let Snape his her with a Leg-Locker Curse. As she fell she aimed her wand and thought _Rictumsempra!_

What was meant to be a Tickling Charm hit Snape with enough force to send him flying backwards into a desk. Freddie used Finite to unlock her legs but before she could move she found herself being hoisted into the air by her ankles.

She struggled against the invisible force. She tried Finite but it didn't work. Snape approached her dangling body, a smirk on his lips as his eyes roamed over her. Freddie flushed as she realized she was wearing a skirt – and she was upside down. _At least I wore cute underwear, _she thought as he stopped in front of her, his eyes on her face now.

"I believe this means...I win," he said slowly, a smug look on his face.

"Yeah, yeah. Are you going to let me down now?"

"I do not know. You are far less _annoying _this way. Perhaps a Tongue-Tying Curse to keep that pretty little mouth of yours shut, hm?" he said, tapping her face with his wand but not actually casting a spell. Freddie tried to glare angrily at him but she felt herself grow wet at his words, at having the tip of his wand caressing her face. Part of her hoped he wouldn't notice the wet spot on her underwear but part of her kind of hoped he would.

He circled her curiously and Freddie tried to turn her head to see what he was doing but being upside down was making her dizzy.

"Will you let me down? I'm getting a headache," she complained as he came back into her field of vision.

"Perhaps...if you ask nicely," he said silkily and Freddie bit her lower lip.

"Please?" she said, meeting his dark gaze.

"Please what?"

"Please let me down...sir?"

His smirk grew wider and he lifted his wand again. The next thing she knew she was on the floor in a heap.

"Well," she said, picking herself up off the stone floor with a groan. "That was fun."

"You did quite well, for someone so young," he said. "I am impressed."

"Thanks," she said with a grin. "Of course, I learned from the best."

"Are you injured at all?"

"No sir. You?"

"Heh. No," he said, shaking his head. "We should go to dinner before it's too late."

"Ugh, can't we stay and duel some more?" she asked, making a face.

"Why do you dislike going to dinner in the Great Hall?" he asked, leaning against his desk.

"Seriously? I sit by myself, no one talks to me – half of them are too scared to even look at me."

"Sounds good to me," he said with a quick smile. "Come."

Freddie grabbed her bag from his desk behind him, breathing in the scent of his aftershave as she reached behind him.

She followed him out of the classroom and was pleased when he didn't head for the Great Hall but instead turned towards his office. She followed him inside, smiling when she saw the flowers still on his desk.

"I'll have Noelle bring us something to eat," he said as he sat down in his chair. "Why don't you start gathering ingredients for us."

"For what?" she asked, surprised. "What are we brewing?"

He looked up at her and gave her what she thought was a real, genuine smile.

"Surprise me," he said softly.

Freddie beamed and headed into the Brewing Lab.


	36. Chapter 36

#

Freddie took the copy of _Moste Potente Potions _that Snape had given her out of her bag and began to flip through it eagerly. He wanted _her _to pick a potion, for them to brew _together_! She had to pinch herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming.

She made her decision quickly, settling on the Ignipellos Poison, a brew that made the drinker feel as if they were being buried alive. It would only take two hours to brew. She gathered the ingredients quickly then went back out into Snape's office where he was eating a steak. There was a milkshake waiting for her and she smiled, glad that she wouldn't have to force herself to eat.

"Want to know what potion I picked?" she asked, sitting down in her chair and picking up the milkshake.

"What potion did you pick, Winifred?" he asked, cutting a piece of stead delicately.

"Ignipellos," she replied with a mischievous grin. He paused briefly and smirked.

"Fun," he drawled before taking a bite.

"I thought it might be."

Freddie took a long drink of her milkshake, surprised to find that this one was cherry flavored. It was just as good as the chocolate.

"Maybe if I hadn't skipped lunch I would've won our duel," she said thoughtfully.

"You never stood a chance," he scoffed.

"Maybe not. What spell did you hit me with at the end?"

"Ah. Levicorpus," he said, a small smile playing on his lips. "Another of my own invention. It only works nonverbally."

"That is _so _freaking cool!" she declared.

"Thank you."

"What other spells have you invented?"

"If you are lucky, someday I may teach you more of them."

"Well then I hope I am lucky," she said, leaning across his desk. "How's your steak? It smells good."

"Not as good as at the Silver Serpent," he said, cutting off another small piece. He paused a moment, then extended his fork across the desk, offering her a bite. Freddie smiled slightly and met his dark eyes as she leaned across the table and took a bite off his fork.

She leaned back in her seat, chewing thoughtfully. She thought she saw his pupils dilate but his eyes were so dark she couldn't be sure.

"It's good – but not as good as the Silver Serpent," she agreed.

He inclined his head and cut himself another bite of steak. Freddie smiled when she noted he didn't wipe his fork first. _Not scared of my germs anymore? _She thought silently, still smiling.

"What?" he asked.

"Hm? Oh. I was wondering if you'd invented any potions like you have spells?"

"Of course."

"Why haven't you written a book?"

"The crews I invented are...not exactly suitable for the public," he answered slowly.

"Poisons?" she asked and he gave a slight nod. "Can we brew one of them?"

"We are already brewing a poison."

"Yeah but it's a boring one."

"Causing someone to feel as if their skin is on fire is 'boring'?"

"Compared to something new, something no one in the world has brewed but you? Yes."

"Not tonight," he said, pushing back from his desk, having finished his steak. "Are you ready?"

"Yes sir," she said, putting her empty glass on his desk and following him into the lab.

#

They spent the next few hours working on the potion together. They started out preparing the first of the ingredients together, then fell into a comfortable routine where she prepared the ingredients and handed them to him, or added them herself under his direction.

The last hour the potion had to be left to simmer over low heat. They cleaned up the workstation together then stepped back out into his office. The dishes from their dinner were gone and there was a bottle of scotch on his desk with a red bow on it.

"Dumbledore," Freddie said and Snape nodded.

"Drinking scotch alone on my birthday," he said, sitting down at his desk. "No surprise there."

"You don't have to drink alone if you don't want to," she said softly. He looked up at her, his expression unreadable.

"It's nearly curfew. You should go back to your dormitory."

"Maybe I _should_," she agreed, approaching her chair. "But do I have to?"

He continued to look at her silently for a long moment. Finally he indicated the chair in front of his desk. Thrilled, Freddie sat down.

Snape raised his wand and two empty glasses appeared on his desk. He opened the bottle of scotch and poured himself a drink. He hesitated briefly before pouring her a small amount and pushing the glass towards her.

Freddie picked up the glass and sniffed it, but didn't take a drink. She was remembering the last time she'd drunk alcohol with Snape.

"I promised you I'd never drink again. Not after last time," she said, swirling the liquid in the cup.

"Actually, you promised me you would never disobey me again. We are not in Knockturn Alley and you will not get drunk off a small amount of scotch, or at least, you shouldn't."

Freddie smiled slightly and took a small sip. It had a strong, woody taste, sort of peppery. She wasn't sure if she cared for it but it was one of the only things she'd drunk recently that the flavor wasn't tainted by her grief.

"You actually _like _this?" she asked and he smirked at her.

"It is an acquired taste," he said.

They drank silently for a minute, with Freddie taking small sips, still not sure if she liked it.

"Did you celebrate birthdays when you were a kid? Or have you always hated them?" she asked curiously.

He shrugged slightly and was silent a moment, a pensive look on his face.

"When I was younger, before I started school, my mother would take me out back to her garden on my birthday and let me practice spells with her wand," he said after a moment.

"Even though you were underage?" she asked, surprised.

"The Trace is not as advanced as the Ministry of Magic would have you believe," he said with a small, twisted smile. He took another long drink of his scotch. "By the time I entered my first year at Hogwarts I knew more curses and hexes than most seventh years."

"Wow," she said, impressed. When she noticed he'd finished his drink she leaned across his desk to pour him another. He inclined his head in silent thanks.

"What about during your school years? Did you celebrate your birthday with your classmates?"

"No," he scoffed, then his face softened slightly. "For a while I had a friend who would gift me things every year – cookies and things she had baked, or books."

_She? _Freddie thought, feeling a small prickle of jealousy, though she knew it was irrational. _Could that be the friend Noelle said he had lost?_

Freddie had a burning desire to ask what had happened to her, but she knew when to keep her mouth shut. Instead she sipped her scotch, hoping he would keep talking. He did.

"I think I stopped celebrating altogether around 5th year," he continued reflectively. "Tensions were even tighter between Houses than they are now and..."

He trailed off, staring into his drink a long moment before taking a sip.

"She wasn't a Slytherin?" Freddie prodded quietly.

"Gryffindor," he answered with a grimace, surprising her. He looked up suddenly, shaking his head slightly as if to clear it. "What about you? How do you celebrate your birthdays, Winifred? Cake and balloons?"

He said this last bit with a sneer but she just chuckled.

"I'm not sure I ever did as a child," she admitted. "I don't remember ever celebrating with my parents. They were so busy with their work for the Dark Lord, I'm sure my having a birthday party would have been tremendously _inconvenient _for them." She rolled her eyes. "With my Uncle Cecil and Aunt Millicent I had a cake every year at least, but really it was just an excuse for them to host another dinner party. I was sent to my room on my 9th birthday when I accidentally exploded the gravy boat all over their friend Mr Malfoy."

Snape showed a glimmer of recognition at the name, or so she thought.

"_Accidentally_?" he quipped, smirking slightly.

"It was!" she protested with a grin. "They sent me to bed without giving me any of my own damn birthday cake. Anubis snuck me a piece later though."

"Your house elf?"

"Yeah – well, my uncle's house elf."

"What about now that you're in school? Your birthday is in February, is it not?"

"Yeah," she said, pleased that he remembered. "Daniel always plans something fun for my birthday. A game of Quidditch, a snowball fight, sneaking out after hours to explore the castle."

He quirked his eyebrow and Freddie gave him an innocent grin. Her grin faded when she realized this would be her first birthday in six years without Daniel.

"Maybe he'll be back by then," she said softly to herself, swirling the little bit of amber liquid left in her glass. She looked up to see Snape watching her, his expression unreadable. "...Do you think he'll turn up?"

"...I do not know," he said quietly.

Freddie sighed softly and slumped slightly in her chair. Without thinking she pulled Hemlock from her pocket and gave the small kneazle an anxious squeeze.

"I wish I could talk to him," she sighed, fiddling with Hemlock's lion-like tail.

"You could write him letters," Snape suggested.

"Hm?" she said, looking up at him.

"You could write him letters," he repeated.

"If I can't find him, if a team of Ministry officials can't find him, what makes you think an owl could?"

"I didn't mean send them," he said, sounding briefly annoyed. He took a drink of scotch and softened his tone before continuing. "Just the act of writing them may, ah, make you feel better."

_What are you a psychiatrist now? _She thought silently but didn't say aloud. He was trying to help, after all. She considered his suggestion a minute.

"What would I do with them?" she asked.

"Keep them," he said with a shrug. "Or burn them. That's what I did but I knew that my friend was-"

He broke off suddenly, realizing what he had said. He stood up and turned away from her, looking at the fire in the hearth, drink in his hand.

"Sorry," Freddie said, so quiet it was almost inaudible. It didn't take a genius to figure out that he'd been going to say 'dead'. Snape jerked his head then finished off his drink.

"I'm going to bed. Take care of the potion then I suggest you do the same."

"Yes sir. Shall I vanish it?"

He paused and looked at her, a smile twisting across his lips.

"Unless you feel like testing it?"

"On myself? No thanks," she chuckled, standing up and finished off her drink. She walked around the desk but didn't go into the Brewing Lab.

"You're going to bed?" she asked, looking up at him.

"Yes," he said somewhat cautiously. "So should you."

_Screw it_, she thought and hugged him quickly.

"Happy birthday, Severus," she said, releasing him and scurrying towards the lab. "Goodnight!"

She didn't look back at him or even look up from the cauldron until she heard his door slam shut. She chuckled to herself, then vanished the potion before leaving his office and heading to her dorm.


	37. Chapter 37

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Freddie lay awake in bed for several hours, staring out the window under the lake. She was thinking about Daniel, and also about Snape and his dead Gryffindor friend. _Who was she? Did he love her? How did she die?_

She tossed and turned for a long time. Finally she decided to try what Snape had suggested. She dug some parchment and a quill out of her trunk and sat up in bed. She lit her wand tip so she could see and began to write.

She felt stupid at first, writing a letter to Daniel that more than likely he would never get to read. But eventually she started telling him about Snape, about everything that had happened in the last several weeks. She wrote so long her hand started to cramp, so she finished off the letter. She folded it, shoved it in her trunk, and lay back down.

She still couldn't sleep.

Her mind was churning, trying to figure out where Daniel might be. If he was still in the forest, they would've found him. _Unless he's hiding. He could be going to great lengths to keep himself hidden, he's a brilliant wizard after all. He's probably with some animals, he loves animals. Maybe he found Kettleburn's chimera. Hell he could even be with the mooncalves! He said he wanted to see them, and I promised to take him but I never did. Maybe that's why he's hiding, maybe he's mad at me. _

She bolted upright in bed and started to put on her boots but stopped. She'd promised Snape she wouldn't go back into the woods. She ran a hand through her hair and sighed.

_This is crazy. I'm crazy. Daniel wasn't mad at me for not taking him to see the mooncalves...at least, I don't think he was. We seemed fine, he was talking about his future wedding, about me being his best man and-_

She let out a frustrated growl and shook her head. This wasn't getting her anywhere. She shoved her feet into her shoes and left her dorm. She didn't hesitate but left her Common Room and headed for Snape's office.

_He'll know what to do, _she thought confidently. _He'll know what to say to make me feel better, or at least give me a potion to knock me out. _

She reached Snape's office and knocked on the door. He didn't answer. She hadn't expected him to. She unlocked the door and entered the dark office. She crossed the room quickly and knocked loudly on the bookcase that hid his quarters.

The door opened quicker than she expected and she stumbled back, surprised.

"What?" he demanded irritably. She swallowed nervously. He looked angry and he was drunk, she could smell the scotch on his breath. She glanced past him into his quarters and saw the empty bottle on the table in front of the couch.

"Speak, Gray," he said sharply and she tore her gaze from his quarters to look up at him. His face was hard, unreadable.

"I-I, uh, n-need to tell you something," she said, feeling her body tremble. Snape put one arm against the door frame, seeming to tower over her. He exhaled slowly.

"Choose your next words wisely, Miss Gray," he said in a low voice.

Freddie pondered the meaning of his words a moment before saying what she had come to say.

"I can't sleep," she began and took a deep breath. "I want to go to the forest and look for Daniel. I would already be out there if I hadn't promised you I wouldn't and I don't want to break my promise but I keep thinking he's out there, that he's hiding somewhere, and I- well, I thought you could help me."

He stared at her a moment, then moved past her – she could smell the scotch, mixed with his natural scent as he brushed against her – and got his cloak off the hook in his office.

"Where are you going?" she asked, glancing back into his quarters once more. It didn't look like he'd been to bed at all.

"_We _are going to look for your friend," he said, opening the door to his office. "Come."

"I thought you didn't want me to go in the forest?" she asked, hurrying out after him.

"I made you promise you would not go into the forest _alone_," he said. "I did not say that I would not go with you."

"...Oh," she said, thinking to herself that she should pay more attention to the wording of things she promised him. He certainly seemed to.

"I sort of through, well," she said, jogging to keep up with his quick stride. "I thought you'd give me a Sleeping Draught or...I don't know, say something to make me not feel crazy."

"The Sleeping Draught would solve nothing, I suspect you would be knocking on my door tomorrow night for the same reason," he said, putting a hand against the wall to steady himself as they climbed the steps up out of the dungeon. "And...I don't know what to say to you, Gray."

"Do you think I'm crazy?" she asked. He glanced back at her.

"Sometimes," he said with a small smirk.

They crossed the Entrance Hall quickly and stepped out into the cool night air. Snape stumbled slightly on the steps leading out of the castle, but recovered without falling.

"Are you okay?" she asked and he grunted. "Are you drunk?"

He gave another non-committal grunt.

"Not sure I'd be doing this sober," she heard him mutter under his breath.

"Do you think we'll find Daniel?" she asked as they crossed the grounds.

"N- I think it is...highly unlikely," he answered.

_Then why are you helping me? _She thought.

"But if it satisfies your need to go into the forest, we can look," he continued.

"Were you reading my mind?" she demanded.

"The mind is not a book to be opened and read leisurely," he drawled. "If your question is am I using Legilimency on you, the answer is no. Your mind if just more...readable than others."

"Readable?" she asked with a chuckle.

"Predictable," he amended. "Your mind is more predictable – shut up."

"Sorry," she said with a sheepish smile, which faded as they reached the Forbidden Forest.

The forest was dark and still as they entered it, and almost eerily quiet. Freddie pulled out her wand, feeling tense.

"We do not have to do this," Snape said, noticing her hesitation. "We could go back to bed."

_We could go back to bed or we could each go back to our own separate beds? _She thought, amused. She shook her head.

"I want to look," she said. "...Do you know where the mooncalves den is?"

"Yes. Why?" he asked, looking down at her. "You think he's with mooncalves?"

"I can't explain it. Will you show me where it is?"

He nodded and led the way through the trees.

They walked for what felt like ages. Freddie kept her eyes and ears open for anything unusual. After seeing nothing but trees and a few foxes, she decided to try to explain the mooncalf thing to Snape.

"I told Daniel about us seeing the mooncalves dancing when we were collecting potion ingredients. He was super jealous and we planned to sneak out to see them-"

She stopped as Snape looked back at her, a pained expression on his face.

"What? We never get caught," she said bracingly. "Daniel's Disillusionment Charm is flawless – way better than mine."

He grimaced and shook his head before continuing on.

"Anyway, we never did go looking for the mooncalves. I was always too busy with you or he was too busy with his – Heather," she said, catching herself before she could say the word 'mudblood' knowing it would upset him. "So I thought, maybe...I don't know. It's crazy, I know it sounds crazy. Maybe I _am _crazy. I don't know anything anymore." She let out a frustrated sigh and ran a hand through her hair. She stopped walking. "This is crazy. _I'm _crazy. Dumbledore should just have me shipped back to the loony bin. The mooncalves thing doesn't explain anything, why would he hide with the mooncalves, why would his _blood _have been-" She stopped and shivered at the memory. She rubbed her arms, pulling up her sleeves because she was half-convinced she could feel blood on her skin again.

Snape walked back to where she'd stopped walking to rant, and he put his hand on her arm. The warmth of his soft hand on her bare skin made her forget the feeling of the blood.

"It does not hurt to go look, Winifred," he said quietly. "Come on."

Freddie nodded and let him lead her on, his hand still on her arm. He linked his arm through hers, like he had that night in Knockturn Alley. Unconsciously she pressed herself closer to him.

They had soon reached the river and began to walk downstream. Freddie looked at the water as they walked and at one point she saw the demonic face of a grindylow just below the surface. She had no way of knowing if it was the same one who had attacked her and caused her to burn her hand. She made a face at it and the grindylow shook its fist threateningly.

She raised her wand menacingly and started to pull away from Snape.

"Leave it alone, Gray," he said, tightening his grip on her arm just a little.

"I wasn't going anything," she protested. "He started it."

She glanced back and gave the finger to the grindylow who was still glaring at her.

"Child," Snape said, shaking his head. "You are a child."

She made a face at him too and he just shook his head.

"Here," he said, leading her away from the river a short way. There was a pile of boulders in a cluster just inside the trees.

"There's an underground den there, where the mooncalves sleep the majority of the month," he said, gesturing towards it. "I will watch your back."

Freddie nodded and headed for the rocks, her wand aloft. She could feel Snape's eyes on her but she wasn't thinking about him, not at the moment. She found the entrance to the den and crouched down to peek inside.

A few big blue eyes opened and looked at her.

"Daniel?" she said hopefully, looking around the den at the piles of sleeping animals. He wasn't there. She hadn't expected to feel so disappointed but she did. She walked away from the den slowly, shoulders slumped.

"Sorry," Snape said quietly as she returned and he touched her arm briefly.

"I don't know what I expected," she mumbled with a shrug.

"Are you ready to return to the castle?" he asked.

Freddie hesitated and he picked up on it.

"Where else do you want to look?" he asked.

"Well I had a – a thought," she answered and bit her lip, not quite sure how to explain.

"What is it, Winifred?"

"...Professor Kettleburn's chimera. Daniel might have gone looking for it and if the chimera were injured he might stay with her and...I don't know. I don't suppose you know where it is?"

"I do not...but I know someone who might," he said, linking his arm through hers. "Come."


	38. Chapter 38

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They walked for at least another hour and Freddie began to suspect they were going in circles. She saw the same large birch tree at least twice.

"Are you sure you're not lost?" she asked and he scoffed at her.

"I do not get _lost, _little girl," he said, pinching her arm slightly. "I know this forest better than you know the back of your own hand."

Freddie glanced at the back of her hand then up at him.

"How?" she asked curiously.

"How what?"

"How do you know the forest so well?"

"Well I _am _the Potions Master. I've spent a great deal of time collecting ingredients in these woods. It saves money and fresh-picked ingredients are always best."

"What about when you were in school? Did you ever sneak out into the forest?" she asked with a grin.

He glanced down at her, smirking slightly, but did not answer.

They walked a little while longer until Freddie heard the sound of hoof beats. Snape stopped and let go of her arm. Freddie looked up at him but he didn't look concerned.

"Put your wand away," he advised as he stowed his in his pocket. Freddie did the same and was about to ask why when a herd of centaurs burst through the trees. They circled them once through the trees, slowing down, then came back to stop in front of them.

"Professor Snape," greeted the large centaur at the head of the herd. "A little late to be gathering Potions ingredients."

"Good evening, Bane," Snape said, bowing slightly. "We are not here for ingredients. We are searching for any clues regarding the missing boy."

"We have seen no trace of your young one," Bane said, his gaze on Freddie. "You should not be here. The forest is no place for a filly."

Freddie prickled a being called a filly but she knew better than to mouth off to a centaur.

"Winifred is under my protection," Snape said smoothly, putting a hand on the small of her back. "We were wondering if the herd had seen any signs of Professor Kettleburn's missing chimera?"

"We have," Bane confirmed. "But your student is not with her."

"How can you be sure?" Freddie blurted out, then cowed slightly under the centaur's intense gaze. "I'm sorry, sir, it's just...he's my best friend. Daniel. He's been my best friend for 6 years, he's like a brother to me."

"You were with him when he disappeared?" Bane asked.

"Yes sir."

The centaur scrutinized her closely a moment.

"Your friend is not with the chimera, Miss Gray. He is not in the forest. We would know."

Freddie sighed softly and looked at the ground, trying to stop the tears from welling in her eyes.

"Thank you, Bane," Snape said. "We appreciate your help and expertise."

"We will let you know if anything turns up," Bane said with a nod, then he turned and led his herd away.

They listened to the hoof beats disappear into the woods. Freddie swallowed heavily and managed to blink the tears away before they fell.

"I'm sorry, Winifred," Snape said, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"It was a long shot," she said with a weak smile. "We can go now, I guess."

In a surprisingly tender gesture he stroked the back of her head gently. She closed her eyes briefly and when she opened them he had taken a few steps away from her.

"Come on," he said roughly.

Freddie followed him through the forest, feeling worse than she had before. The centaurs said Daniel wasn't in the forest. They would know better than anyone.

_But they didn't say he was dead either, _she said, feeling a glimmer of hope.

Snape let out a loud yawn as they walked through the trees. Freddie checked her watch. It was after 3 in the morning.

"I'm sorry I made you bring me out here so late," she said softly. "I just thought...I don't know..."

"You did not _make _me do anything," he said. "And you do not have to apologize. If I thought Lily were still alive, I would not stop looking until I found her."

He paused briefly, then continued walking at a faster pace. Freddie knew better than to as but she watched him as she followed him, having to jog to keep up.

_Lily, _she thought to herself. _That must have been his friend who died...the Gryffindor girl. _

Neither of them spoke until they were back in the castle and Snape stopped outside the entrance to the Common Room. He gave the password and the door opened.

"Thank you," Freddie said softly. "For taking me out there to look."

"If you are thinking of hugging me again, I _will _hex you, Gray," he said dryly.

Freddie let out a bark of laughter. She gave him a quick hug, then darted down the passageway to the Common Room. She was only a few feet away when he hit her with a Trip Jinx. She hit the ground with an 'oomph' but got up quickly.

"Worth it," she said, giving him a quick grin back over her shoulder.

"Go to bed, Gray," he said irritably.

"Goodnight, sir."


	39. Chapter 39

Freddie woke just a few short hours later, to the feeling of someone watching her. She opened her eyes and was startled to find Snape standing next to her bed.

"Bloody hell," she said, sitting upright in bed and rubbing her eyes. "What time is it? What d'you want?"

"You have a study period this morning," he said. It was a statement not a question but she answered anyway.

"Yeah, I was gonna sleep in."

"No, you're going to help me teach my class, since you kept me up all night. Get dressed."

She ran a hand through her hair and squinted up at him, wondering if she were still asleep.

"You gonna stand there and watch?" she asked.

His face flushed an angry shade of red.

"Be in my classroom in 10 minutes," he growled. "And _don't _go back to sleep."

"Yes sir," she said, rolling her eyes when he turned his back to her.

Freddie got dressed quickly. Despite her lack of sleep she was actually excited. He'd never asked her to help with a class before.

"You were up with Professor Snape all night?" Maggie asked as Freddie pulled the curtains open around her bed.

_Oh _now _she wants to talk to me? _She thought, a feeling of annoyance rippling through her. She ignored her classmate and left the dorm.

Freddie hurried down to the Potions classroom to find Snape sitting at his desk, rubbing his temples.

"Hangover?" she asked, sitting on the edge of the desk she usually sat at during class.

"Lack of sleep," he replied coolly. "Take this and write the instructions for the Calming Draught on the blackboard."

He pushed the book containing the recipe towards the edge of his desk. She waved him off.

"I don't need that," she said dismissively, approaching the blackboard and picking up the chalk. "Unless you've improved upon it in the last two years?"

He didn't respond and Freddie began to write the recipe on the blackboard. It was one she knew by heart and she didn't stop until she was almost finished. She glanced over her shoulder to see Snape's eyes on her.

_Is he looking at my butt? _She wondered, smirking slightly to herself.

"Are you stuck, Miss Gray?" he asked in a drawling tone, tapping the book on his desk with one finger.

"No sir," she answered and finished writing the last two steps.

She put the chalk down and walked over to his desk.

"So," she said, sitting on the edge of his desk, facing him. "How am I supposed to help you teach your class?"

"You can start by getting off my desk," he said irritably.

"Okay, okay. Jeez. Touchy," she said, sliding off his desk. "You're grouchy when you don't sleep."

He glared at her, a sour look on his face.

"I strongly dislike you sometimes," he said.

"Only sometimes?" she asked with a smirk.

"Enough chit-chat," he said. "The fourth years will be here any minute."

"Alright, what do you want me to do?"

"You've seen me teach classes for the last six years. Be me."

"Brood around, insult them, make them piss their pants?"

He looked up at her, smirking slightly.

"Think you can do it?" he asked.

"I'll do my best," she promised.

As the fourth year students filtered into the classroom, they all stared wide-eyed at Freddie. Most of them looked terrified but no one dared to whisper about her, not with Snape in the room.

When the bell rang, signaling the start of class, Snape stood up from his desk.

"This is Miss Gray," he said without prelude. "She is my apprentice and she'll be teaching this class today. I expect you all to be on your best behavior and to obey her as you would me. If not there will be...unpleasant repercussions."

He headed for the door and Freddie felt briefly alarmed.

_He's leaving me alone with them?_

"I will return shortly," he said smoothly, then left the room.

The students all stared at Freddie, too afraid to speak.

"The instructions are on the board," she said in her best bored-sounding Snape voice. "You may begin."

She watched with a sense of satisfaction as they scrambled for the supply cupboard. She walked around Snape's desk and sat down in his chair, feeling a thrill of excitement. She kept an eye on the students as she looked over the papers on his desk. There was a stack of ungraded essays on the corner of his desk. She picked them up and looked through them.

She opened the top drawer of his desk and found a quill and an inkwell of red ink. She settled in to grade the papers for him.

She was reading when she heard whispers. She glanced up to see two Gryffindor girls whispering to each other.

"Quiet," she said in a dangerous tone and they fell silent.

She continued working on the essays, glancing up at the students periodically. Once when she looked up she noticed a small Slytherin girl with her hand in the air.

"Miss Gray?" she said timidly.

Freddie pushed back from Snape's desk and walked over to her.

"What?" she asked shortly.

"M-my potion. It won't turn red no matter how much powdered porcupine quills I add. Did I mess up?"

Freddie glanced at the brew in the cauldron, which was a violet color. She picked up the ladle and brought a spoonful up so she could examine it more closely. She nodded slightly to herself and put the ladle back.

"Let me see your porcupine quills," Freddie said and the girl quickly handed her the mortar. "You have to shake them up really well, like this."

She put her hand over the top of the mortar and shook it vigorously before handing it back to her.

"There, try it now," she encouraged.

The girl added just a dash of the powdered compound to her cauldron and it immediately turned red.

"Wow. Thank you ma'am," the girl said, looking up at her with bright blue eyes. Freddie smirked slightly.

"Back to work," she told her.

She strode along the rows of desks, checking the work of the other students. She shook her head at most of them. She stopped beside a cauldron that contained a thick, blue liquid.

"What is this?" she asked the Gryffindor boy, squinting at him through the dark gray smoke coming off of the brew.

"A...Calming Draught? Ma'am?"

"What's your name?"

"Don Segrest, ma'am."

"Do you know what would happen if someone were to drink this potion of yours, Mr Segrest?"

"Um..." he looked down at his cauldron then back up at her. "Probably something bad?"

"If we were to give a dose of this brew to someone suffering from hysterics, then _would _no longer be upset," she said. "However...they would also be dead."

"Oh," he said, looking down again. "Well that sucks."

_ He wouldn't say that if I were Snape, _she thought with a snort.

"Indeed. Do you know where you screwed up, Mr Segrest?" she asked.

He took a moment to re-read the directions on the board, then looked across his workstation.

"I think I used too much moonstone, ma'am."

"You are correct," she said, and pulled out her wand. She vanished the contents of the cauldron. "Start over, Mr Segrest, and be more aware of your actions this time."

"But I won't have enough time to complete it," he protested.

"I will ensure you are graded on your ability and not on your final product," she said. "Now, start over."

"Yes ma'am," he said and went back to the supply cupboard.

Freddie continued making the rounds around the desks. She noticed that the students seemed to be growing more at ease with her. A few of them even raised their hands to ask her questions and even though they were stupid questions, she answered them.

"It is important no to be too heavy-handed with ingredients in this particular brew," Freddie said as she circled back to the front of the classroom. "If the ingredients are not measured _precisely, _they can leave the drinker in a deep, irreversible sleep, often resulting in death – if they are lucky." She sat on top of Snape's desk and faced them, legs crossed. "Otherwise they'll spend the rest of their lives asleep, their loved ones weeping at their bedsides as they waste away."

Some of the Slytherin students grinned wickedly at her. Freddie smirked slightly and continued to watch them work.

Snape didn't return until about 15 minutes before the bell rang. He looked more rested and alert. _Probably took an Invigoration Draught_, Freddie thought as she got up from his desk. She'd finished grading the essays for him. He didn't approach the desk but instead walked around the classroom. Freddie followed close behind as he inspected their work.

He made a few snarky comments but there were no complete disasters. He gave them a homework assignment which they quickly copied down before the bell rang. When the students were gone, Snape closed the door and turned to face her.

"You look like you feel better," she commented. "Invigoration Draught?"

"Did they behave?" he asked, ignoring her question.

"Yeah, they weren't so bad. They asked a few stupid questions but I didn't mind answering. It was actually kind of fun."

"You would not be saying that if you'd been teaching the class for nearly a decade," he said dryly.

"Probably not," she agreed with a chuckle. "Are you okay now? I could stay and help you with the next class."

"Go to Transfiguration, Winifred," he said, witting down at his desk.

"Yes sir," she said, picking up her bag and walking towards the door. "_You're welcome_."

He scoffed at her and she grinned at him before leaving the classroom.

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**Author's Note: The more yall review the more it makes me want to update! Thanks everyone!**


	40. Chapter 40

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That evening at dinner Freddie sat alone at the end of the table as usual. She was picking at a piece of chicken when someone approached her. She looked up to see the fourth-year Slytherin girl from earlier, looking nervous.

"What?" Freddie asked dryly.

"I- uh- never mind," the girl said quickly and started to walk away.

"Wait," she said shortly. "Come back."

The girl froze then turned around and came back. She wouldn't meet Freddie's gaze.

"What's your name?" she asked the girl.

"Amelia Avery, ma'am," she answered, looking up quickly then back down.

"What do you want, Miss Avery?"

"I was wondering if...if you might help me with my Potions homework? It's okay if you can't, if you're busy or you don't want-"

Freddie held up a finger to silence her.

"Sit," she said, gesturing to the empty seat next to her. "Let's see what you've got."

20 minutes later Freddie had cleared the food from the table in front of them so they could spread the books and parchment out in front of them. They'd been joined by four more of Avery's classmates who asked for Freddie's help. She was a bit short with them but inside she found she was actually pleased to be able to help them. Weeks of being ignored or feared by her classmates, it was nice to have people actually talk to her – even if they were fourth years.

"Miss Gray," said Snape's voice and Freddie turned to face him. "We need to talk."

"Yes sir," she said obediently, putting her things in her bag and getting up from the table. She followed him out of the Great Hall and down the stairs into the dungeons.

"Is this about me helping the fourth years?" she asked. "Cuz I'm just giving them some pointers, I'm not doing their work for them."

"It is not about that," he said, continuing towards his office.

"Oh...well what then?"

"In here," he said, opening the door to his office. He sounded even more displeased than usual.

"It's not about the hug, is it?" she asked nervously.

"Sit," he said sharply, shutting the door behind them.

Freddie sat and she felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up as he walked behind her before circling around to sit at his desk. He steepled his hands in front of him and leaned across the desk slightly.

"I've been talking with your other teachers. There are...some concerns," he said.

"About what?" she asked, biting her lip.

"Well to start with...you have not been attending Care of Magical Creatures since term resumed. Why?"

Freddie hesitated and looked away. _I should've known he'd find out eventually. _

"Answer me, Gray," he said sharply.

"I...I want to drop the class," she said.

"No," he said immediately, then paused. "Why?"

She hesitated again, then decided it was best to be honest with him.

"It was – it _is _Daniel's favorite class. And now that he's not here...it's too hard to be there without him. I tried to go down there, I really did, but it's like I was – I was frozen to the spot. I couldn't do it."

She couldn't look at him, not wanting to see his face if he was sneering at her. She knew she must sound ridiculous. She hated herself for it.

"Hm," he said, but she still didn't look up. "Your other teachers tell me your grades have been slipping. Your classwork has suffered but you're still turning in your homework on time and receiving your usual high marks. If I didn't know you so well I'd think you were cheating."

"I'm not!" she protested, raising her head.

"No one thinks you are, Miss Gray," he said smoothly. "Given your grades prior to the...end of last semester. I want to know why. Your Potions work has not suffered, both inside the classroom and out. Why?"

"I don't know," she mumbled with a shrug.

"I think you do know," Snape said in a low voice. "Winifred."

She blew out a sigh and looked up at him, meeting his dark, unreadable gaze.

"The homework is easier because I can do it here or in my dorm, not in the classroom. Being in class now it's...difficult. I feel overly aware that Daniel's not beside me and it makes me think about...makes it hard to focus. And the stares and whispers. Well they haven't exactly died down yet."

"I see," he said, standing up from his desk. He walked over to the fireplace, a thoughtful look on his face. "Do you sit in front of every classroom as you do mine?"

"Uh, yes sir. I always have. It helps me focus during lectures."

"I would suggest you try sitting in the back of the classroom," he said, idly adjusting a vial on the shelf above the fireplace. "Where you did not sit with Mr Byrd. It will also make it more difficult for your classmates to stare at you – they would have to turn to look at you and risk being caught by a teacher."

"That's...a really good idea, actually," she said.

"Why the tone of surprise?" he asked dryly, turning to look at her. "I am quite intelligent, you know. And as your Head of House...I am here to help."

"Thank you. I'll try sitting elsewhere," she said with a nod.

"If that does not work, I suggest your try taking a Wit-Sharpening Potion," he said. "It is certainly well within your ability to brew."

She nodded again in agreement.

"What about...Care of Magical Creatures?" she asked nervously. "Any suggestions?"

"Given the circumstances...I will allow you to drop the class," he said. "_But _I expect you to be here, working on brews, during your new free periods."

"Yes sir," she said. "Gladly. Thank you."

"If you're not here brewing, I want you in my classroom helping me teach."

"Seriously? Okay!" she said happily.

"Give it a few weeks, you will not be smiling," he said with a small smirk.

"Why are you letting me help teach?" she asked curiously.

"It is good experience for you," he said. "And less work for me."

"Fair enough," she chuckled. "May I brew a Wit-Sharpening Potion tonight?"

"You may. I need to brew a Cure for Boils for Madam Pomfrey," he said, walking into the lab. She got up and followed him.

"I can help," she offered. "Or I could do both of them if you want."

"You may gather the ingredients while I set up the cauldrons."

"Yes sir."


	41. Chapter 41

#

The next month passed by fairly quickly. Freddie's grades improved inside the classroom after she'd followed Snape's advice. She spent her free time in the lab or helping him in the classroom. She now had a gaggle of younger Slytherin students who sat with her at mealtimes, pestering her for help with their Potions work, but she didn't really mind. She liked that they called her 'ma'am'.

Freddie woke early on the morning of February 13th. Her birthday. She'd had a rough night, tossing and turning through most of it. As silly as it seemed, she found herself imagining that Daniel might show up for her birthday.

Eventually she gave up on sleep and sat up. It was too early to go down to breakfast. She pulled open one of the curtains around her bed so she could look out under the lake. The giant squid was resting just outside her window.

"Good morning, Inky," she said softly, waving to the squid. "...I don't suppose you've seen Daniel?"

The squid didn't answer, of course, just blinked slowly at her. She sighed softly, then pulled a piece of parchment from her bag to pen another letter to Daniel.

_Dear Daniel,_

She paused briefly, trying to figure out what to say.

_It's my 17th birthday today. I wish you were here. Part of me hopes you'll still show up. Maybe you will. I can imagine you waltzing into class with a birthday cake, grinning at me like everything is fine. _

She paused again, her hand trembling slightly. She took a steadying breath.

_So I'm 17 now I guess. I'm finally of age. I can Apparate, I can use magic outside of school. I don't really feel any different._

_ I wonder if Snape remembers it's my birthday today? Wonder if he'll do anything for me? We drank together and brewed a potion on his birthday, maybe we could do something like that tonight._

She put her quill down and thought a moment. Drinking alone with Snape sounded like the best way to spend her birthday, short of Daniel showing up.

_And I'm of legal age now, _she realized. _If there's any chance of anything happening between us, my odds just increased. _

She chuckled to herself and picked up her quill.

_He's been flirting with me, I think. Although it may be all in my head. He's so hard to read. Is he flirting or is he just being nice to me because Dumbledore told him to? I wish I could read his mind._

_ I wonder what you would think of all this? Do you have any advice for me? Maybe you could send me a letter?_

She stopped again and sighed. The more time went by the less confident she felt that Daniel would turn up.

_Maybe he really is dead..._

She hated herself for even thinking it. She balled up the parchment in her fist and got up to throw it into her trunk. She paused when she saw a small package sitting on top of her trunk. It hadn't been there a moment ago.

She picked it up and looked it over. Plain brown paper, no note. Her mind immediately went to Daniel. She shoved the balled up letter into her trunk and sat down on her bed with the package.

She unwrapped it carefully, hoping to find some clue as to who it was from. There was no note, just a small black box. She opened it to find a pair of silver earrings. They were shaped like snakes – cobras to be exact – and the tails formed hooks.

She smiled slightly to herself and took them to the bathroom to put them on. She returned to her bed and looked the package over for clues. She doubted it was Daniel. Any gift he'd ever given her had been wrapped in brightly colored paper with an elaborate bow.

She sniffed the brown paper curiously – it smelled of herbs and parchment. Her smile grew wider. She knew who had sent the gift.

Freddie got dressed and headed down to breakfast. She was one of the first to arrive in the Great Hall. There were a few Hufflepuffs, stuffing their faces, and a few Ravenclaws with books spread out in front of them while they ate. She turned her back to them as they looked up to glare at her.

She sat at the end of the Slytherin table and poured herself a cup of tea. She put some eggs and bacon on her plate and picked at it while she flipped through a new Potions book she'd gotten in Hogsmeade last weekend.

Eventually she was joined by her third and fourth year flunkies.

"Morning Miss Gray," Amelia said, sitting down next to her. "This is for you."

She slid Freddie a box of chocolates from Honeydukes. She marked her spot in her book and closed it before picking up the box.

"Why?" she asked, looking down at the girl.

"My cousin – Christine Gibbs – she told me it's your birthday today."

Freddie looked down the table at her classmates, then back at Amelia.

"What else did she tell you about me?"

"That they used to call you Potions Princess," she answered brightly.

"And now they call me 'murderer'," she said darkly.

Amelia's face fell and the group around her got quiet.

"The way I see it, ma'am," the girl said softly. "Regardless of what you did or didn't do...Slytherin is about loyalty and we should stand by you, no matter what."

Freddie stared at her but the girl's blue eyes showed nothing but the truth. Slowly, Freddie smiled.

"Well," she said slowly. "You've got a better handle on that than most it seems."

"Hey Miss Gray," said a boy across the table. "Are you any good at Transfiguration?"

"I'm good at everything, O'Neil," she said dryly. "Show me what you're having trouble with."

#

Freddie didn't see Snape at breakfast and she didn't have a Potions class that morning. She didn't see him until that afternoon, when she showed up to help him teach his class of third years. She waited to see if he would mention her birthday, but he didn't. He didn't mention her earrings either.

_Maybe they weren't from him after all, _she thought, touching her earrings thoughtfully.

"Can you handle them alone today?" Snape asked her as she wrote the recipe on the chalkboard.

"Of course," she said, surprised. "Why?"

"I have something to do," he answered, standing up from his desk.

"What?" she asked curiously.

"I do not owe you an explanation, Miss Gray," he said in a low voice. "Will you teach my class or not?"

"Sure. Whatever," she said with a nonchalant shrug.

He inclined his head slightly in thanks before leaving the classroom. Freddie finished writing the recipe for the Shrinking Solution on the board, then sat down at Snape's desk with a sigh. She couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. She tried not to pout as the third years began to drift into the room. Once they were all seated, she stood up.

"Good afternoon," she said to him. "Professor Snape had a personal matter to tend to-" she resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "-so I'll be leading this lesson alone today. Last year you were assigned an essay on the Shrinking Solution, correct?"

"Yes ma'am," said a few while others nodded.

"So you should be able to tell me the effects of this brew?"

A few students raised their hands.

"Miss Sykes?" she said, calling on a young Slytherin girl.

"It causes creatures to revert to a younger form," she answered.

"Correct. In the 1500s esteemed potioneer Zygmunt Budge developed his own version of the Shrinking Solution, a much more potent version that numerous witches and wizards across the globe still use today. Can anyone tell me what for?"

She looked out over the class, at all the uncertain faces. Then one Gryffindor girl's hand shot way up. She didn't know her name so she pointed at her.

"Farmers use it to transport livestock over long distances. They can shrink a whole herd of cows and carry them in their pocket," she answered and gave a quick grin. "I grew up on a farm."

"That's very good, Miss-?"

"Glaspell," she answered. "Laura Glaspell."

"Very good, Miss Glaspell," she said, wishing she could award house points. "Now, the recipe is on the board, you know where the ingredients are. You have one hour. Begin."

Freddie sat back down at Snape's desk as the students began gathering ingredients. She watched them for a while, absently doodling on a piece of parchment on Snape's desk. Eventually she pulled out her books to work on her homework, thinking to herself that this was the worst birthday ever.

**Author's Note: I have three more chapters typed up so far (and many more to go) and i was planning to post them over the next couple days but they are soooo good I kinda want to share them with y'all all at once, especially since so many of you have been reviewing and I know yall love this as much as I do. So what do yall want - post em now or spread it out? I know yall wanna know how Freddie spends the rest of her birthday! 😍**

**PS to the reviewer who asked why the other teachers wouldnt be suspect about Snape letting Freddie help teach...my answer is that since she's his apprentice she is capable of teaching the younger students. And the students themselves dont complain because she isnt as hard on them as Severus - even the Gryffindors 😉 **


	42. Chapter 42

Author's Note: Ask and ye shall receive! I love you all! lol

#

When class was over, Freddie cleaned up the classroom. She extinguished the lights and left the room. She went to her dorm and dumped her bag on the floor. She sat on the edge of her bed and sighed.

_This birthday sucks, _she thought. _I wish Daniel were here..._

"Miss Gray?"

Freddie looked up to see Amelia Avery peeking her head in the door.

"We're going down to dinner, you coming?" the girl asked cheerfully.

Freddie couldn't help but smile.

"Not tonight, Amelia. Thank you though."

"Yes ma'am. Goodnight."

"Amelia," she said as the girl turned to go.

"Yes ma'am?"

"You can call me Freddie – outside the classroom anyway."

The girl grinned broadly.

"Goodnight, Freddie," she said. "Happy birthday."

"Thanks."

When Amelia was gone, Freddie pulled Hemlock out of her pocket. She grew him to full size and held him in her lap. She petted him absently while she stared out the window under the lake.

_This sucks, _she thought again with a sigh. _I don't wanna be alone on my birthday... Maybe Snape will let me brew a potion. _

She stood up, shrunk Hemlock, and put him back in her pocket. She picked up her bag and took out a few books to make room for the record player and a few vinyls.

_He might not even be in his office, _she thought as she left the Common Room. _If he hasn't returned from whatever _thing _he had to do, then I'll pick something to brew without him and I can play my music as loud as I want. _

The thought cheered her slightly. She stopped outside the door to Snape's office and was about to lift the enchantment to go in when she thought better of it. She knocked first, wondering if he were back yet.

"Enter," said his low, dangerous voice.

"Hey," she said as she pushed the door open, but stopped short when she saw two Ravenclaw boys elbow-deep in flobberworms on the floor in front of Snape desk. "Oh. Sorry."

"Good evening, Miss Gray," Snape said, standing up from his desk. "Mr Stinton and Mr Bell are serving detention for attempting to _cheat _during my fifth year class this morning."

"How unfortunate," Freddie said with a faint smirk. The boys glared at her.

"Back to work," Snape barked at them, then turned back to Freddie. "Come. You have work to do."

Her curiosity piqued, she nodded and followed him into the Brewing Lab as he waved his wand to reveal the entrance. The room was cold and dark. Freddie lifted her wand and lit the torches along the wall.

"I have something for you," Snape said from behind her, his voice low and close to her ear. A shiver went through her at the feeling of his hot breath on his ear. She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry.

He walked around her, over to the workstation. She followed him over. There was a folded piece of parchment on the desk. He tapped it with his finger, a smile playing on his lips.

"Have fun," he said softly, then swept out of the room, back into his office.

Freddie picked up the parchment and unfolded it. It contained a hand-written recipe for a potion titled Liquescimus Poison. Snape's handwriting. A thrill went through her.

_This must be one of his_, she realized, grinning.

She took the parchment with her into the supply cupboard to gather ingredients There were a few ingredients listed that they didn't usually have. Acromantula eggs, deadlyius caps, doxy venom. Some were rare and a few even illegal to possess. She found them sitting on top of the step ladder, waiting for her. She gathered the rest of the ingredients and carried them back to the workstation.

#

Freddie worked on her potion for the next hour and a half. She heard Snape snap at the two Ravenclaw boys periodically. She smirked to herself every time he did.

She was bent over the cauldron, stirring in Abraxan hair when she felt herself being watched. She finished stirring, then straightened up and turned to face Snape who was standing in the doorway.

"Are they gone?" she asked.

"They are," he said, entering the room and walking over to the workstation.

"Good. This is one of yours?" she asked, indicating the potion.

"It is. Know what it does?" he asked, a smirk playing on his lips.

"Kills someone?"

"Yes but _how_?" he prompted.

"Well, a lot of these ingredients affect the mind. I'm guessing it drives someone crazy."

"You should brush up on your Latin, Miss Gray," he said. "Liquescimus Poison liquefies the brain of whoever has the misfortune to drink it."

"Whoa," she said, looking at the bubbling green brew behind her. "That's..."

"Brilliant? Inventive?"

"Dark," she said with a chuckle. "I like it."

"I knew you would," he said, then he raised his wand and placed a stasis spell on her cauldron.

"Hey!" she protested. "What gives?"

"Did you eat dinner with your little fan club?"

"Uh...no, but I'm not hungry."

"No? Well, I suppose I won't take you out to dinner then."

"Wh- wait, what? You're going to take me out to dinner?"

"I got the Headmaster's permission. But, if you're not hungry..."

"I could eat," she said with a grin.

"Good. Go change. I'll meet you in the Entrance Hall."

Freddie looked down at her Hogwarts uniform, then back up at him.

"What should I wear?" she asked.

"Anything that does not make you look like a student," he answered.

"Yes sir," she said with a grin, then left his office to return to her dorm.

Freddie dug through her trunk, looking for something to wear. She had plenty of slacks and sweaters, t-shirts, but nothing _hot_. She wanted to look hot if she was going out to dinner with Snape.

Finally she found something – a black dress her aunt had bought her for dinner parties. It had been at least a couple of years since she'd worn it, but she tried it on anyway. It wasn't as tight as she had expected, probably because she'd lost weight recently. It _was _tight across the chest but she did some arranging and made it more comfortable.

She went into the bathroom connected to her dorm and checked her reflection in the mirror. Her first thought was _Holy crap my boobs look good!_

She'd grown a few inches in the last two years so it was a bit short. She figured her bosom was pushing the limits of impropriety enough as it was, so she used her wand to lengthen the dress to her ankles. It had a slit along one side that went up past her knee. She liked the way it felt when she walked.

She stared at her reflection for several minutes. She looked good, but something still seemed off.

_My hair, _she realized. _I miss my black hair. _

Her hair had been blonde since the day Miriam had washed the blood out of her hair at St Mungo's. Shaking off the memory, she put her wand to her temple and performed a Color-Changing Charm. Immediately her hair darkened to it's natural jet-black color.

She checked her reflection again and smiled wickedly. Her black dress, dark hair, and snake earrings. The overall effect was what she wanted – _hot_.

She went back into her dorm and put on her favorite black lace-up boots. They were a little dirty but a quick _Scourgify _cleaned them up nicely. She knew she was meant to wear heels with a dress, but she'd always hated wearing high-heels. She would always end up turning her ankle.

She dabbed some honeysuckle essence on her wrists and neck. She looked at her bed, where Hemlock sat on her pillow.

_Sorry, buddy, no room for you, _she thought, petting his furry head. _Tonight I have to be a grown up. _

She strapped her wand to her thigh, thinking how it wasn't fair that so few dresses had pockets. She grabbed her cloak and put it on over her dress before leaving her dorm.

Heads turned as Freddie waltzed through the Common Room. She told herself it was for a different reason this time. _They're staring because I'm hot, _she thought smugly.

She ascended the stone staircase out of the dungeons to find Snape waiting for her. His back was to her at first and he was looking out over the grounds.

"Are you ready?" she asked.

He turned to face her and she didn't miss the sharp intake of breath, or the way his glittering eyes drank in her appearance.

"...You changed your hair back," he said finally.

"Yeah, I thought it looked better this way. More Slytherin-y," she said, crossing the hall. She noticed his eyes flick to her legs as she walked and the slit in her dress revealed her pale legs. "Do you like it? Oh, I forgot – you have no opinion on my hair, right?"

He didn't respond, but turned away from her. Smirking slightly, she followed him out into the night.


	43. Chapter 43

They crossed the moonlit grounds together. Freddie looked up at the sky. The moon was waxing, not quite full yet, and it cast enough light for them to see the grounds clearly as they walked up the path towards the gate.

"The moon will be full in a few days," she said as they walked. "We should probably gather some herbs, don't you think? We're low on wolfsbane and fluxweed."

"Perhaps," he said with a nod. "The weather's getting warmer. Spring will bring a host of new plants for us to harvest."

"Yeah. So, where are we going?" she asked as they approached the gate. "Hogsmeade? You said you got Dumbledore's permission."

"Do you _want _to go to Hogsmeade?" he asked.

"It doesn't matter where to me," she answered with a shrug. "As long as I'm...out of the castle."

She'd started to say 'as long as I'm with you' but thought better of it.

"Tired of your little fan club?" he asked, looking down at her with a smirk.

"It's your fault, you know," she chuckled. "You let me teach and now they flock to me with their homework problems."

"You should have made yourself less approachable."

"They're good kids," she said with a shrug. "Most of them anyway. Sure sometimes their questions are annoying...but at least I don't have to sit alone anymore. They have Slytherin loyalty figured out better than the rest of my housemates. Besides-" they stepped outside of the gates together. "-I kind of like it when they call me ma'am."

Snape chuckled softly and his smirk widened.

"I heard some of them calling you 'Potions Princess' the other day," he said. "Like your classmates used to."

"You knew about that?" she asked, grinning.

"Of course," he answered. "...It is a better nickname than 'Freddie'."

"Ha!" she barked. "Don't suppose you'll call me that instead of 'Winifred'?"

"Not a chance."

"That's alright. I've actually gotten used to 'Winifred', at least from you."

"Take my hand," he said, extending his left hand. "Winifred."

Freddie did so happily and immediately felt the pull she now recognized as the feeling of Apparition.

When her feet hit the ground on a dark sidewalk, Freddie fought to stay upright. Snape held tight to her hand until the wave of dizziness passed.

"Does that ever get any easier?" Freddie groaned as a wave of nausea rolled through her stomach.

"You get used to it," he said.

Freddie looked around and found they were outside of The Silver Serpent.

"Was it Dumbledore's idea for you to bring me to Knockturn Alley for my birthday dinner?" she asked as they approached the entrance.

"I could happily return you to school, if you prefer," he said dryly.

"Not a chance," she replied, smirking.

Snape inclined his head, then opened the door for her. Freddie stepped inside and he followed her in. It was just as she remembered, dimly-lit with hooded figures at nearly every table.

Snape led her to the same table in the corner they'd sat at before. He pulled out her chair for her.

"Thank you," she said as she sat. "And they say chivalry is dead."

He smiled slightly as he took his seat across from her. As soon as he was seated, a hooded figure appeared.

"Good evening," said a woman's voice. "Can I start you off with something to drink?"

"Scotch," Snape said immediately.

"Do you have anything with ginger in it, like ginger tea?" Freddie asked.

"We have ginger beer," the witch answered. "It has a very low alcohol content."

"That's perfect, thank you," Freddie said and the waitress disappeared.

"Is your stomach bothering you?" Snape asked.

"A bit. From Apparating. It'll pass," she said, picking up the menu that appeared on the table in front of her.

"Will you be able to eat?"

"As much as I usually can. I'm fine," she assured him.

"Good. I'm not wasting money on food just for you to throw it up," he said with a faint sneer.

She rolled her eyes at him, then continued looking over the menu.

"Is the steak the best thing they have?" she asked.

"It is. I recommend the filet. It is a smaller portion size more suited to your palette at the moment."

Freddie nodded in thanks. She looked over the sides and decided to try a veggie pasta with it. The waitress reappeared with their drinks. Freddie popped the cap off her beer and took a drink, feeling the ginger go to work immediately at settling her stomach.

"Are you ready to order or do you need another minute?" the waitress asked, pulling a pad and self-inking quill from the pocket of her robes.

"We are ready," Snape said. "T-bone, medium rare, baked potato with butter only."

"Yes sir and for you, madam?"

"I'll have a 6oz filet, medium rare, with pasta I think," Freddie answered.

"Very good, madam," the waitress said with a nod, then vanished again.

"_Madam_," Freddie scoffed, then took another sip of her beer.

"I thought you liked being called 'ma'am'?" Snape asked, picking up his scotch and taking a drink.

"Ma'am yes, 'Madam', no. Madam makes me sound 40."

"Semantics," he scoffed. "How's your beer?"

"Kind of gross," she admitted. "but it's working."

"Good."

Freddie unfastened her cloak and slid it off, revealing her bare shoulders. She folded it and put it in the empty chair next to her. She saw Snape's dark eyes watching her as he took a long drink of his scotch.

"So," she said, picking her beer back up. "Was this your idea or Dumbledore's?"

"...Do you have to make things so difficult?" he asked, mildly annoyed.

"I'm frustrating that way," she said with a shrug and a grin.

"That you are," he said, shaking his head and taking another drink. "It was...not entirely the headmaster's idea."

"The potion was yours though," she said. It wasn't a question. "Some of those ingredients were...difficult to obtain, I imagine."

"Your point, Winifred?"

"Is that where you were this afternoon?"

He didn't answer but gazed at her silently, sipping his drink.

"Oh, that reminds me," she said. "Can you award house points to Samantha Sykes and Laura Glaspell for their work in class today?"

"The Gryffindor girl? Why? Her performance in class is generally sub-par."

"She was the only one who knew what Zygmunt Budge's version of the Shrinking Solution is used for commercially."

"Hm. Would you like the ability to award and detract house points yourself?" he asked, setting down his empty glass. It automatically refilled itself.

"Seriously? Yes!"

"I believe I can make that happen. I will speak to the Headmaster and see if, as my apprentice, you can be awarded the same privileges as the Head Boy and Girl. He may also grant you access to the Prefects bathroom, at my recommendation."

Freddie had heard rumors about the Prefects bathroom. Bathtubs big enough to swim in. Golden toilets. The toilets she could care less about but the idea of sinking into a bathtub that covered her legs and boobs at the same time was downright orgasmic.

"Winifred? Would you like that?" he asked, interrupting her fantasy.

"Oh _yes_," she said. "Definitely."

He looked at her strangely and she just grinned.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" she asked, knowing full well the question might come back to bite her in the ass.

"I'm not," he scoffed, then paused for a long moment as he took a drink. "Your assistance this year has been invaluable to me. You deserve to be rewarded for your work."

Freddie flushed with pride and smiled. She was about to thank him when the waitress appeared with their food. Both steaks smelled amazing and Freddie was surprised when her stomach growled loudly.

"Can I get you two anything else?" she asked.

"Could I get something instead of this?" Freddie asked, handing her the empty beer bottle.

"Of course, Madam," she said, accepting the bottle which immediately vanished. "What would you like?"

"Maybe some sort of light wine?" she said, looking to Snape to make sure it was okay.

"Bring her a glass of Pinot Grigio," he said with a nod.

"Yes sir, coming right up," she said and vanished.

Freddie picked up her fork and knife. She cut off a piece of meat and took a bite.

"Mm," she said as the flavor spread across her tongue. It was absolutely amazing with no hint of the bitterness that had tinged everything she'd eaten in the last 3 months. "Oh my god."

"It's good?" Snape asked, a smirk playing on his lips as he watched her eat.

"It's...mm. Amazing," she said through a mouthful of steak. His smirk grew wider.

"I am glad," he said before turning his attention to his own meal.

The waitress returned with a glass of white wine and Freddie mumbled a thank you in between chewing the mouth-watering food.

She tried to eat slowly and savor every bite. She took small sips of wine, which was good. It had hints of peach with a nice bite to it. The pasta salad was good as well but not as good as the steak.

Freddie finished her food rather quickly and leaned back in her chair, feeling comfortably full. She sipped her wine and looked around the dining room while Snape continued eating. There were maybe a dozen witches and wizards seated at tables around the room. She couldn't see any of their faces, couldn't even tell who was male or female. She supposed that was the point of the little hole-in-the-wall restaurant.

_They could be anyone. They could be murderers, rapists...Death Eaters. Definitely Death Eaters. I wonder if my parents ever ate here?_

She looked back across the table at Snape to find he was staring at her intensely – and he wasn't looking at her face.

"What?" she asked, smirking at him over her wine glass.

His eyes flicked to her face and she hoped he would blush at being caught staring at her breasts, but he didn't.

"I was trying to figure out where you've hidden your kneazle," he said casually.

Freddie smiled and batted her eyes at him.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" she teased.

This time he did blush but it only lasted for a split second. He took a long drink of his scotch, then set the empty glass down. It refilled again.

"Excuse me a moment," he said, patting his mouth with his napkin. He stood and Freddie watched as he headed for the bathroom, chuckling to herself.

Freddie was sipping her wine, waiting for Snape to return, still looking around the room curiously when she noticed a hooded figure who had been dining alone stand up. The hair on the back of her neck stood up and she put her free hand on her wand as the figure approached her. As he stepped into the candlelight of her table she could see it was an older man with white-blonde hair and piercing blue eyes.

"Good evening," he said in a smooth voice. "A young woman such as yourself should not have the misfortune of dining alone. Would you care to join me?"

"I'm not alone, thank you," she said politely, then took a sip of her wine.

"If I were your date, I wouldn't leave your side, especially in a place like this," he said with what could only be described as a feral grin. "You never know who could be watching."

"I can hold my own, thank you," she said with her most-charming smile. She had her wand out under the table, ready to curse him the moment he dared make a move.

"I would be remiss if I did not wait with you until your date returns," he said smoothly.

"Yaxley," said Snape's voice and Freddie looked past the wizard to see he had returned.

"Severus, my old friend," he said, turning to face him. "How are- she's with _you_?"

Yaxley looked back down at Freddie, surprise evident on his face.

"Yes," Snape said tersely. "We were just leaving. Winifred?"

Freddie quickly stowed her wand while Snape left several galleons on the table to pay for their meal. She took a final sip of her wine then stood and gave Yaxley a polite smile.

"Nice to meet you," she said, inclining her head slightly.

"Enjoy the rest of your evening. Good to see you, Severus," he said, but his eyes lingered on Freddie in her dress as she fastened her cloak around her shoulders.

Snape took her arm and walked slowly towards the door but she could tell by the pressure he exerted on her arm that he wanted out of there quickly.

"Who was that?" Freddie asked in a low voice once they were out of the building on the dark sidewalk. Snape didn't answer but looked at her pointedly and tapped his left wrist.

_A Death Eater, _she realized and nodded in understanding.

"We should leave now," he said.

"Do we have to Apparate?"

"Yes. Are you going to puke if we do?" he drawled.

She shook her head no.

"Good," he said and she had a split second to steel herself before they were whisked away.


	44. Chapter 44

#

When they appeared on solid ground Freddie leaned against Snape, trying to steady herself. Instead she found herself on top of him on the ground. She looked down into his dark eyes and sucked in a breath, realizing their legs were tangled and she was laying on his chest.

"Get off me, Gray," he grunted, pushing her off and quickly getting to his feet.

She sat there a moment, trying to orient herself. She looked around and realized they were in a grassy field near Hogsmeade. Snape extended a hand to help her up and she took it gratefully. She brushed grass and dirt off her dress while he looked around.

"I must have overshot a little," he said. "Probably because you were leaning on me."

"_Sorry_," she said, rolling her eyes at him. "I was trying not to _fall over_."

"Well you failed," he said haughtily. "However, you did not puke on me. I thank you for that."

"You're welcome," she said sarcastically.

"We can walk the rest of the way back to the castle. Come," he said, taking her arm.

"You worried some Death Eater is going to jump out of the shadows and snatch me up?" she asked sardonically, noting his tight grip on her arm. He said nothing but relaxed his grip slightly.

"I could have taken that Yaxley fellow," she said practically. "I had my wand trained on him under the table the moment he approached me."

He glanced down at her.

"You have your wand?" he asked, looking her over.

"Of course," she said loftily, and pulled her dress aside to show him her wand strapped to her thigh. He quickly looked away. "I'd never go anywhere without my wand," she declared. "At least as long as I can help it."

"Good," he said shortly.

Freddie noticed he was walking slower than normal as they headed for the path that would lead them back to the castle. He didn't seem to be in any particular hurry. _Could it be he's actually enjoying my company?_

"Did you receive a birthday gift from your aunt and uncle?" he asked casually.

"No," she said, shaking her head. "Reckon they're still mad at me for the St Mungo's thing."

"Possibly."

"My 'fan club' as you call them, found out about my birthday. Amelia Avery gave me a large box of Honeydukes chocolates. A few others gave me sweets throughout the day. ...It's silly but I was still hoping for something from Daniel," she said softly.

"It is not silly," he said quietly, squeezing her arm.

They had just reached the dirt path and started up it when Freddie heard a loud explosion that made her jump. She whirled around, grabbing for her wand, just in time to see an explosion of color in the sky. _Fireworks. _

Then she heard another unusual noise – the sound of Snape laughing, loudly.

"What?" Freddie asked, unable to help but smile at the sound.

"I've never seen you jump like that," he said, trying to control his laughter. "That scared you, Gray?"

"Startled," she insisted. "Not scared."

"Same thing," he said, smiling. Freddie rolled her eyes at him and looked up at the sky as more fireworks went off.

"Why are they shooting fireworks?" she asked, craning her neck to look up at them. "It's not a holiday. Well, it's Valentine's Day tomorrow but no one shoots fireworks for that."

"Who knows?" Snape said. "Come – at least sit down so you don't get a crick in your neck."

She glanced at him to see him wave his wand and produce a gray quilt on the grass for her to sit in.

"Let's move off the path," he said, dragging the blanket away from the road and to a shadowy area near a building.

"Thanks," she said gratefully and plopped down on the blanket to watch the fireworks. Snape remained standing awkwardly for a minute before finally kneeling on the blanket next to her.

"Whoa, look at that one!" Freddie exclaimed as a firework exploded into a massive shower of golden stars.

"Mm-hm," Snape said absently. She looked at him discreetly from the corner of her eye and saw he was looking at her. She smiled to herself, feeling pleased.

The next burst of fireworks took the shape of a large hippogriff that flew over the rooftops of the village.

"Whoa!" Freddie said again in awe. She leaned farther back to watch the show until finally she just lay down on the blanket, her head next to Snape's thigh. The fireworks continued in an array of different colors and shapes. Freddie chuckled to herself as the sparks formed a blue dragon that shot a stream of orange sparks from its mouth.

"Daniel would love this," she said wistfully. "It's the sort of thing he would do for me for my birthday."

"I do not think Daniel is responsible for this," Snape said quietly.

"I know," she said softly, sadly. "He's gone."

She closed her eyes and swallowed the lump in her throat. She didn't open her eyes when she felt Snape's hand on her head, felt him start to stroke her long black hair gently. Small shivers went through her body with each motion of his hand. The fireworks were still exploding in the background, but Freddie still didn't open her eyes. She was worried if she did he would stop.

Eventually the noises stopped. She felt Snape's warm hand linger on her forehead just a moment before he withdrew it.

"Show's over, Winifred," he whispered softly.

She opened her eyes finally and saw Snape's glittering eyes looking down at her. His face seemed relaxed, his features softened under the light of the stars. All she could think was how badly she wanted him to kiss her and wondered if he felt the same.

"We should go," he said finally, getting to his feet then helping her up. "It's past curfew."

"Okay," she murmured in agreement.

He vanished the blanket and Freddie waited to see if he would take her by the arm again. He didn't. Slightly disappointed, she followed him as he started up the path. Still, she couldn't help but smile as her scalp was still tingling from his touch.

"Do you think I could learn Legilimency?" she asked as they approached the Hogwarts gate.

"Not from me," he answered immediately.

"What? Why not?"

"You are not digging around in my brain, nor I in yours."

"You already have dug around in mine," she pointed out.

"That was a life or death situation," he replied uncomfortably. "...I did not _want _to do it."

"It's okay. I know why you did it," she said with a shrug. "I forgive you."

"How reassuring," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. She smiled at him.

"You're welcome to infiltrate my mind any time you want," she said, winking at him. "I'm an open book."

"Your mind terrifies me," he drawled. "If you wish to learn Legilimency, there are several books I can loan you. You can practice on your weak-minded classmates. I doubt they'll even notice."

"Really?"

"As long as you do not tell anyone I told you to do it," he said with a faint smirk. "Try not to get caught. You should read up on Occlumency as well."

"Occlumency?"

"It is the ability to shield your mind from intruders. It goes hand-in-hand with Legilimency."

"Awesome."

"Meaning, Winifred, I will know if you attempt to use Legilimency on me," he warned.

"Okay, jeez. I wasn't gonna," she said, even though she _had _thought it would be cool.

"Hm," he grunted.

They crossed the castle grounds together and ascended the steps into the castle.

"Can I go back to work on my potion?" she asked as they entered the castle.

"_My _potion, you mean? Not tonight. It's nearly midnight already and you have classes tomorrow. I've kept you out long enough," he said, holding open the door to the dungeons. "We wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea."

"Yes sir," she said, smirking slightly at him.

She followed him down the corridor and stopped outside the entrance to the Common Room.

"Thank you for my birthday dinner, Severus," she said softly, smiling up at him.

He peered down at her and grimaced slightly.

"You want to hug me, don't you?" he asked, sounding pained.

_Among other things, _she thought and nodded her head.

He looked up and down the corridor quickly, then opened his arms. Thrilled, Freddie rushed into his embrace. She hugged him tight, pressing her body as close as she could. He returned her embrace, putting his arms around her for just a moment. When he released her his hands lingered, brushing against the bare skin of her back for just a moment before he let her go. A shiver went through her, causing goosebumps to break out on her skin as he pulled away. Her whole body flushed.

"Bed, Gray," he said gruffly. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Professor," she said, then turned away and went into her Common Room.

Freddie lay in her bed that night, feeling restless. She replayed the night, precious memories with Snape, over and over again in her head. With the curtains drawn around her bed and being as quiet as she possibly could she brought herself to climax repeatedly, recalling the feelings of his hands on her skin, and playing with her hair.

She lay there afterwards, basking in the afterglow, and reliving the night over again in her head.

_There's no doubt he's attracted to me, _she thought to herself, a smile playing on her lips. _His actions tonight went far beyond anything he's done before. He's more than pushed the boundaries of the student-teacher relationship. The earrings, the dinner, staring at me, the way his touches lingered...I wouldn't be surprised if he was behind the fireworks as well. _She sighed happily and rolled over, pulling the blanket over her sweaty body. _So he's definitely attracted to me...but he's probably not going to make a move. He's too smart, too calculated for that. There's a line there he's not going to cross on his own. Not while I'm a student anyway. After next year, after I graduate, I might have a real shot at getting him into bed...but that doesn't mean I can't have fun with him in the meantime..._

#


	45. Chapter 45

#

Freddie had Double Potions class the first thing the next morning. She headed down to breakfast, feeling genuinely hungry for the first time in ages. She sat down and fixed her plate with pancakes, sausage, and bacon. She was just starting to dig in when she was joined by her 'fan club'.

"Good morning, Freddie!" Amelia said cheerfully. "You changed your hair color!"

"We almost didn't recognize you," said Brian O'Neil as he sat down across the table. "By the way, I got an Outstanding on my essay for McGonagall yesterday, thanks to you."

"You're welcome," she said with a small smile, shoving a piece of sausage into her mouth.

"I like your hair," Amelia said as she fixed herself a plate. "I've been thinking about changing mine. Brown is boring."

Freddie glanced at Amelia's chestnut ponytail and nodded thoughtfully, chewing her food.

"Blonde or red would look good on you with your blue eyes, they'd really stand out," Freddie offered. "Can you do a Color-Changing Charm? I can help you if you want."

"I learned it last year," Amelia said, beaming. "Thanks though."

"Girls," Brian said, rolling his eyes.

Freddie chuckled and took a drink of her orange juice. The bell rang, signaling the end of breakfast, and Freddie quickly shoved more bacon into her mouth.

"Later kids," she said through her mouthful of food. She slung her bag over her shoulder and headed back down into the dungeons.

Throughout the 3 hour class period, Freddie couldn't help but notice Snape seemed to be ignoring her. He was purposefully not looking at her and even avoided checking her work on the Mobiliter Potion the class was brewing.

She was mildly annoyed at him for ignoring her, but it wasn't hard to guess his reasoning. After last night, he was keeping his distance. _It's almost funny, _she thought to herself as he avoided her gaze yet again.

When the bell finally rang, Freddie took her time cleaning up her workstation. When her classmates were gone, she slung her bag over her shoulder and approached Snape's desk.

"I have a free period next, you want me to stay and help with the next class?" she asked.

"Not today, Miss Gray," he said, not looking up at her. She shook her head slightly and chuckled internally.

"May I go work on the Liquescimus Potion in your office then, sir?" she asked, determined not to let his attitude bother her.

He let out a grunt and nodded slightly.

"Thank you," she said pointedly and smiled as she left the room, hoping he was watching her leave.

_If he wants to be all withdrawn that's fine, _she thought to herself as she walked down the corridor. _Last night was a bit much, especially for him. I can play it cool for a few days, let him get the stick out of his arse and relax some...then worm my way back into his good favor, like a true Slytherin. _

She lifted the enchantment that warded Snape's office and headed straight for the Brewing Lab. She was eager to continue working on her poison, but stopped when she saw several books on the workstation that had not been there last night.

There were three books there and a folded piece of parchment on top with _Miss Gray _written on it in a familiar scrawl. She looked at the books first – _Infiltrating the Inferior Mind: A Beginner's Guide to Legilimency, Living with Legilimens, _and _Telepathia Inermis: A Handbook for Wandless Legilimency. _

She unfolded the parchment that had her name on it and read it.

_**Miss Gray,**_

_** The Prefect's bathroom is located on the fifth floor, four doors past the statue of Boris the Bewildered, on the left hand side of the corridor. **_

_** The current password is 'spic and span'.**_

Freddie folded the note and put it in her pocket. She glanced at the potion, which still had a stasis spell on it, then back at the books. She wanted to work on the potion, but she also wanted to check out the Prefect's bathroom. _And _she wanted to start reading about Legilimency.

She considered her options a moment, then picked up the books and put them in her bag. She left Snape's office and re-sealed the door before heading upstairs. Most students were in class at the moment so she knew it would be a good time for her to check out the bathroom without anyone else there.

She navigated the rotating staircases and stepped off onto the landing of the fifth floor. She found the statue of Boris the Bewildered and counted four doors past it. She tried the knob and of course it was locked.

"Spic and span," she said aloud and the lock clicked open.

She pushed the door open and stepped inside. There were stalls along one side of the room. Opposite the toilets was the biggest bathtub Freddie had ever seen. It was sunk into the floor, like a swimming pool, and there were dozens of taps surrounding the tub on each side.

Thrilled, Freddie locked the door behind her. She put her bag down near the tub and quickly shed her robes. She didn't bother folding them but left them in a heap next to her bag. She turned on the water and waited for the tub to fill.

While she waited, she examined the taps. There were probably a hundred of them, each inlaid with a different jewel. She experimented with the different taps, turning them on and off to see what was in each one until she found some she liked. She left two taps running, one that produced a eucalyptus bath oil and another that made bubbles that smelled like spearmint.

She'd never taken a bubble bath before so she was even more excited as she stepped down into the water. It was the perfect temperature and she let out a soft moan as she relaxed into the warm bath. The bubbles popped and tickled against her skin. She sank under water, soaking her hair before resurfacing.

She did a few laps around the tub, then came back to rest in the shallow end. She relaxed a moment, looking at the stained glass windows that depicted beautiful mermaids, flashing their tails and playing with their hair.

She watched them for a while, wondering how the Prefects felt about the mermaids leering at them in the bath. _No doubt the boys certainly don't mind_, she thought with a smirk. She leaned out of the tub and reached for her bag. She pulled out _Infiltrating the Inferior Mind _and settled in to read until lunch time.


	46. Chapter 46

#

Over the next few months, Freddie learned Legilimency by practicing on younger students. Most of them were unsuspecting first years but as she progressed she got willing victims in the form of her Potions students. They were glad to help her if it meant she'd help them with their homework. She became skilled at extracting specific memories or thoughts from their minds.

She continued her Potions work with Snape, of course. He continued alternating between ignoring her and being kind to her – having tea together, brewing potions together. They even had drinks a few times, staying up late into the night, talking, but those times were few and far between.

One Friday evening in early May, Freddie went down to Snape's office after dinner. He'd promised her a new potion to brew and she was excited. The last few weeks they'd been busy replenishing the stock of healing potions for the Hospital Wing. She was more than ready for something new.

She stopped by her dorm first to change clothes. The weather was warm again and the Brewing Lab was even warmer. She shed her restrictive school uniform and opted for a pair of khaki shorts and a black v-neck shirt. She left her bag, not wanting to lug it down to Snape's office.

She put on her cobra earrings and sat on the edge of her bed to braid her hair.

"Hey Freddie!" said Amelia's cheerful voice as she popped into the room. "We're gonna play Exploding Snap, wanna join us? Ooh you're braiding your hair? Can I help?"

"I have a potion to brew with Professor Snape," Freddie said as the girl walked over.

"Cool! I know how to do a french braid – can I?" she asked, sitting next to Freddie on her bed.

"Go for it," Freddie said, dropping her hands and turning her back to her so Amelia could braid her hair.

"What are you and Professor Snape working on?" Amelia asked curiously as she played with Freddie's hair.

"I'm not sure yet. We've been doing healing potions all week for Madam Pomfrey but tonight he said we're doing something new."

"How can you stand spending so much time alone with him?" Amelia asked curiously. "I know he's our Head of House and he treats us better than the others, but he's still...uh..."

"Difficult?" Freddie suggested with a smile.

"That's one word for it," she laughed.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie chuckled. "I dunno, I guess I got used to it. He's not always so sullen and moody."

"He's not?"

"Well maybe 98% of the time he is," she said and Amelia laughed. "But, I love Potions. So putting up with a grumpy git like him is worth it."

"There we go," Amelia said, finishing up the braid with a black hair tie.

"Thanks," Freddie said, getting up. She picked up Hemlock and Amelia tilted her head curiously.

"Is that a cat?" she asked.

"A kneazle," Freddie answered, showing him to her before shrinking Hemlock in her hand and stowing him in her pocket.

"Whoa! You just did that without a wand! That's amazing!"

"Yeah," she said, grinning. "See ya later, kid."

Freddie hurried from the Common Room and down the hall to Snape's office. When she reached the door she stopped and knocked.

"Enter," said his bored voice.

Freddie entered the room and greeted him with a smile.

"You're late, Miss Gray," he said, putting aside the Evening Prophet.

"I was changing clothes – the lab gets got this time of year," she explained.

His eyes lingered on her a moment, his dark eyes glittering. Finally a twisted smile curled across his lips and he picked something up off his desk and offered it to her.

Intrigued, Freddie leaned across the desk and took the parchment.

"What's this?" she asked as she unfolded it.

"A recipe," he answered.

She scanned it quickly, grinning.

"Another of yours?"

"Uh-huh," he said, still smirking.

"Thank you," she said happily and started to go into the lab.

"Wait."

"Hm?"

"Next December the Wizarding Schools Potion Championship is being held. Since you are of age, I thought you-"

"Yes!" she declared before he'd even finished. "Yes, I want to enter! I _have _to!"

"I'll recommend you then," he said.

"Do you think I can win?" she asked seriously. "There'll be competitors from all over the world, right?"

"Yes and yes. I believe you can. I have not spent the last several years molding you into a 'Potions Princess' for you to lose," he said and Freddie flushed with pride. "Besides...I have something that practically guarantees your victory."

"Oh yeah?"

He studied her silently a moment, then pushed his chair back from his desk slightly. He picked up his wand and performed a silent spell which unlocked the bottom drawer of his desk. Curious, Freddie tried to peer inside. There were several books but she couldn't see the titles as he quickly grabbed one and shut the drawer. She heard the lock click automatically.

"What's this?" she asked, taking the book as he handed it to her. "...Zygmunt Budge's _Book of Potions_."

"Not just any copy. This is an original 16th century copy of Budge's _Book of Potions _that contains the spirit of Zygmunt Budge. Open it."

Freddie opened the book to the title page. It was blank, other than the printed title. Then, all of a sudden, words appeared as if an invisible hand were writing them.

_**Good evening, young potioneer. How fortunate you are to have come across this piece of literature. You, young potioneer, hold in your hands my masterpiece. With it, my place in history is assured. **_

_** This potion book will teach you the composition of particularly potent and complex potions. With this textbook, with my mind guiding you along each page, you can accomplish even the most impossible of brews, assuming you are not a complete idiot. Good luck and let us begin...**_

"Whoa," Freddie said as the words disappeared. "Where'd you get this?"

"I may tell you someday, if you are lucky," he said, taking the book from her and closing it. "You can look at this later. You have a potion to brew."

"Saxum Brew," she said, looking at the parchment he'd given her. "It turns the drinker to stone?"

"_Very _good, Miss Gray," he praised. "You have been practicing your Latin."

"Yes sir," she said with a grin.

"Go. Brew it."

"Yes sir," she repeated and headed into the lab to get started.


	47. Chapter 47

#

Freddie spent the next hour following Snape's recipe for the Saxum Brew, but her mind was on the Potions contest and the _Book of Potions. _Would Zygmunt Budge write on every page? If she wrote a question would he answer? Where did Snape get the book? How did Budge put his mind into the book?

"Did you enter the Potions Championship when you were in school?" Freddie called out to him as she finished up the potion and began cleaning up.

"Yes," he called back.

"Did you win?" she asked loudly, rinsing the beakers and other instruments.

"Where do you think I got my gold cauldron from?" he responded, appearing in the doorway with a smirk on his lips.

"Really? You won?"

"Your disbelief is insulting, Miss Gray," he said haughtily.

"Sorry! Of course you won, you're brilliant. I just meant..." she faltered. "Did you use the _Book of Potions_?"

"I did and it proved a vital tool. I _may _not have won without it," he said, walking over to her cauldron. He took a look at the simmering gray potion inside. "Good girl."

She flushed with pride and walked over to the cauldron.

"It wasn't that difficult," she said modestly.

"No, but it was one of my own creations. You indicated interest in my personal recipes."

"Definitely!"

"You are the only person on Earth to brew this, apart from myself."

"That is _so cool_," she said, thrilled. "I wish I could test it, see how it works."

"If you are not opposed to the idea of harming mice, I could get some from Minerva. She uses them for Transfiguration."

"Seriously? Yeah! I mean, we kill rats for potion ingredients. I'm not exactly the squeamish type."

"No, I suppose you aren't," he said, a small smile playing on his lips. "I will get mice tomorrow. Bottle your potion and we'll test it after dinner tomorrow evening."

"Couldn't you get them tonight?"

"Patience, Winifred. Bottle your potion and finish cleaning up," he said and turned and went back into his office.

Freddie quickly did as told and went out into his office. She checked her watch. She still had an hour before curfew and she wanted to have a bath.

"Can I take this with me?" she asked, picking up the _Book of Potions_.

"You may, as long as you do not lose or damage it," he answered, then took a drink from a half empty glass of scotch.

"Thank you," she said pointedly, then paused. "He can't _see _me, right? Budge's spirit or whatever?"

"No," he snorted. "Why?"

"I like to read in the bath," she said with a shrug.

"After four centuries trapped in a book he'd probably appreciate seeing-" He stopped short, seeming to realize what he was saying. He picked up his glass of scotch, shaking his head slightly. "Do not get my book wet, Gray."

"I won't," she promised, grinning. "See you tomorrow."

"Goodnight, Gray. Enjoy your bath," he said, smirking at her.

Freddie left Snape's office and headed upstairs to the Prefect's bathroom. The stairs were pretty much empty as most everyone was settled in for the night. She was almost to the fifth floor when a ghost floated down the stairs towards her.

"Hello Freddie," Moaning Myrtle said in her usual depressed tone.

"Hey Myrtle. How are you?" she asked, regretting the question the moment it left her mouth.

"Horrible," the ghost moaned and sighed dramatically. "A cute boy _yelled _at me and threw a bottle of Firewhiskey at me. I should report him for having alcohol in the castle!"

"Were you spying on him in the bath?" she asked. The teenaged ghost loved to hang out in the Prefects bathroom, especially when there was a boy there. That's how Freddie had met her, sometimes Myrtle would hang out and talk to her when she was trying to read and relax.

"He didn't have to be so _rude_!" Myrtle said tearfully.

"Of course not," Freddie said soothingly. "Boys are jerks. Is there anything I can do?"

"No, I'm going back to my bathroom. I want to curl up in my toilet and be alone," she sighed.

"Okay, well, you know where to find me."

"Thanks, Freddie," Myrtle said, her voice dripping with emotion. "You're a good friend."

Myrtle started crying as she continued down the stairs. Freddie sighed and hurried up the last staircase to the fifth floor. She gave the password and entered the Prefects bathroom. She locked the door and immediately started the water running, with her favorite oils and bubbles. She shed her clothes and put the book down on top of them, near the tub, along with her wand.

When the tub was full enough, she stepped down into the water with a blissful sigh. She relaxed a moment, and let the tub finish filling up. She turned the taps off then got the book and started reading.

The first recipe listed was the Beautification Potion. As she red the ingredients list, Zygmunt Budge's handwriting appeared, offering tips on nearly every ingredient.

_**Morning dew – this is best if collected early in the morning, the same day you begin your brew. It is more potent if gathered from a rose bush. **_

_** Rose petals – Again it is necessary to collect this ingredient the same morning. A single red rose will suffice. Some say pink roses are just as good. They are not. **_

There was more advice listed along the recipe. As she reached the bottom of the page, more words appeared.

_**Thankfully the effects of this potion are temporary. Imagine spending the rest of your life attracting hordes of obsessive admirers. Ugh! A truly repellent thought.**_

Freddie chuckled, thinking that he reminded her a bit of Snape. She turned the page but paused suddenly. She thought she heard something.

"Myrtle?" she said aloud. "Is that you?"

There was no response, just the slow drip of the faucet. She shrugged and tried to settle back into her reading. She was reading the recipe for Budge's Shrinking Solution when she was hit from behind with a spell.

"_Stupefy!_" yelled a familiar voice and she was thrown forward into the water. She had a split second to throw Budge's book clear of the tub before her face hit the water.

She came up spluttering and scrambled for her wand. She was hit again, pushing her back into the water.

"Geck!" she said, recognizing her attacker. "What-"

"For Daniel!" he hissed. "_Petrificus Totalus_!"

Freddie body stiffened and she sank into the water. She panicked at first as her lungs filled with water.

_Finite! _She thought frantically, releasing herself from the spell. She clawed her way to the surface, coughing the water from her lungs. She tried to get to her wand, but Geck was there at the edge of the tub with his foot on her wand.

"What did you do to him?" Geck demanded.

"I didn't-"

She didn't get to finish her sentence as he kicked her in the face. She felt the bones in her face crunch. Hot blood poured from her nose. She let out a cry and tried to grab her wand.

"Heather was right about you! You Slytherins are all the same," he said, kicking her again. Freddie treaded water, moving away from him to the other side of the tub.

"You're _evil_ and you'll get what you deserve," he sneered, pointing his wand at her.

"Wait-"

"_Stupefy_!"

The spell hit her with enough force to knock her back. Before her head cracked against the stone side of the tub, a blast of white energy shot forth from her body. She didn't see if she hit him or not as she lost consciousness and sank beneath the water.


	48. Chapter 48

#

"Winifred! Winifred!"

She heard a voice calling her through the black. It was distorted and she couldn't tell who it was. She heard music, also distorted and faint. _'Raven hair and ruby lips, sparks fly from her fingertips_'.

"Winifred!" the voice called again, louder than the music. "_Exscreo!_"

Water surged from her lungs and she began to cough. The music faded as her vision cleared and Snape's worried face appeared from the darkness. She continued to cough and rolled onto her side as she expelled water from her lungs. Then she heaved and puked up a stomach full of water.

"Easy, Winifred, you're okay," Snape said as she continued to retch but nothing came up. She saw blood dripping onto the tile floor. She touched her nose gingerly and sat up with a groan. She felt him drape something around her and she realized she was naked. She pulled his cloak around her body, feeling herself blush.

"Wh- wh-" she tried to ask but her teeth were chattering.

"You're okay," Snape said. "You're okay, you're okay."

He kept repeated it and Freddie wondered who he was trying to convince, her or himself.

"I-I'm okay," she managed finally, and looked past him to see Geck's body on the floor. "Geck!"

She jumped up and tried to rush over, but Snape held her back.

"He's alive," he said, blocking her and holding her by the shoulders. "Unconscious. He attacked you?"

"Y-yeah. While I was reading. He...he said...for Daniel," she said, feeling herself start to shake.

"Okay. Okay, you need to get to the Hospital Wing," he said. "Can you get dressed?"

"Wh-no-I-"

He pulled out his wand and with a flick of his wrist he magicked her clothes back onto her.

"Come," he said, taking her arm.

"N-no, I don't want to go to the Hospital Wing," she said, digging in her heels.

"Winifred, your nose is broken, you cracked your skull, you nearly drowned-"

"I don't want to get in trouble!" she exclaimed, her voice cracking.

He stopped and looked at her, surprise evident on his face.

"You aren't going to get in trouble, Winifred. _He _attacked you," he said, still holding her arm.

"What if they don't believe me? They didn't believe me before, everyone thinks I killed Daniel, I-"

"Winifred, trust me. No one is going to-"

The bathroom door opened and Dumbledore came in, followed by a frantic-looking McGonagall. Moaning Myrtle floated in the corridor right behind them.

"Severus! What- what happened?" McGonagall asked as Dumbledore walked over to Geck and examined him.

"Nathan Gecker attacked Miss Gray while she was in the bath," Snape said, unable to keep the anger out of his voice.

"But – _why_?" McGonagall asked.

"Minerva," Dumbledore said, straightening up. "Take Mr Gecker to the Hospital Wing."

"But-"

"Now, please, Minerva," he said calmly.

McGonagall pulled out her wand and with a flick of her wrist levitated Geck's body and left the bathroom.

"Are you alright, Miss Gray?" Dumbledore asked, turning his piercing blue gaze on her.

"I'm fine," she mumbled.

"She is _not _fine," Snape protested. "She almost drowned! She'd be dead if I hadn't-"

"Severus," Dumbledore said, holding up his hand. "Do you know why Mr Gecker attacked you, Miss Gray?"

"He said..." Freddie swallowed before continuing. "He thinks I killed Daniel. Like everyone else."

Dumbledore continued to stare at her a moment. Freddie wiped the blood from her nose and wiped her hand on her shorts, wincing slightly.

"Severus," Dumbledore said finally. "Take Miss Gray to the Hospital Wing and get her cleaned up. I will deal with Mr Gecker when he wakes up, after I fetch Professor Flitwick."

"Yes Headmaster," Snape said, taking Freddie's arm again.

"Wait," she said, pulling away. "My book!"

She hurried across the room and got the _Book of Potions _from where she'd thrown it. She was pleased to see it was unharmed.

"Come on Gray," Snape said, putting a hand on her arm and leading her out of the bathroom. "Your nose is bleeding."

He paused on the stairs. He picked up the end of his cloak which was still wrapped around her. He wiped her face with it gently, then pressed it to her nose.

"Hold this here until we get to the Hospital Wing," he said softly. She nodded and covered his hand with hers. His hand lingered on her chin a moment before he let it fall.

They continued down the stairs together with Snape keeping a hand on her arm. Freddie was still reeling from everything that had happened.

"I don't understand," she said as they walked down another flight of stairs. "Geck – he – we were friends. I can't believe he – we used to play Quidditch together, used to study together, the three of us, I don't..."

"Don't worry about it, Gray," Snape said soothingly. "Dumbledore will take care of it."

"I just don't understand," she said, shaking her head, then sucked in a breath through her teeth as she found it hurt to move her head. Snape squeezed her arm lightly in what she took to be a reassuring manner.

"...How did you find me?" she asked after a minute. "If you hadn't – if you hadn't pulled me out of there..."

"A ghost found me. Moaning Myrtle," he said. "She heard the attack."

_Attack. I was attacked, _she thought, the realization giving her pause. Snape stopped when she did and put his hand on her back.

"Come on, Gray. Let's get you cleaned up," he said softly, stroking her back slightly. She nodded and winced again in pain. Snape moved his hand up to her shoulder and let her towards the Hospital Wing.

#

Freddie sat perfectly still on the hospital bed while Madam Pomfrey tended to her wounds. Snape and McGonagall were across the room, having a whispered conversation. Snape kept glancing at her and finally he shook McGonagall off and walked back over to her side.

"How is she?" he asked Madam Pomfrey.

Freddie opened her mouth to say she was fine but nothing came out.

"A broken nose, fractured skull, a few bumps and bruises," Madam Pomfrey answered. "I'll have her fixed up, right as rain, in just a moment."

The nurse pulled out her wand and pointed it at Freddie's face. Freddie flinched and Snape put a hand on her shoulder.

"_Episkey_," the nurse said and Freddie felt a sharp pain in her nose. She couldn't help but let out a whimper and Snape squeezed her shoulder lightly before letting go.

"I'll get you a potion for your head, then I need to keep you here overnight for observation," Madam Pomfrey said to her.

Freddie didn't react. Snape touched her cheek briefly as the nurse walked away. He dropped his hand then picked up a bowl of warm water Madam Pomfrey had left on the bedside table. He squeezed out the rag and began to clean the blood from Freddie's face. She met his eyes – they looked brown and soft in the light of the lanterns, but there was also a glitter of anger. He finished cleaning her face gently, then put the rag aside.

"Winifred, I-" he began but broke off as the doors to the Hospital Wing opened and Dumbledore walked in, along with Professor Flitwick. Snape stood up.

"Excuse me, Winifred," he said and strode across the room. He followed Dumbledore and Flitwick behind the curtains of Geck's bed.

"Here we are, dear," Madam Pomfrey said, appearing with two goblets. "I've got a potion for your skull fracture and a Calming Draught – I think you're in a bit of shock."

The nurse put one of the goblets in her hands. Freddie looked at the goblet then looked towards the curtains where Snape had vanished. She could hear them talking in hushed voices.

"-not good enough, Albus, I want him expelled!" Snape's voice shouted.

"Oh for goodness sake," Madam Pomfrey said. "Drink that, dear."

Madam Pomfrey bustled off and disappeared behind the curtains. Freddie drank the potion and within seconds her head started to feel better. She listened, trying to hear what was going on across the room. They were all whispering except for Snape.

"He could have killed her, he meant to kill her! If I hadn't-"

"Enough, Severus," Dumbledore said loudly, but his voice was calm. "Professor Flitwick is his Head of House, not you."

"No but I am _hers_," Snape said angrily. "One of my students was attacked! I won't stand for it! I want him dealt with!"

"He will be," Dumbledore said firmly. "By myself and Professor Flitwick. Not by you."

"I-"

"That's enough!" Madam Pomfrey said loudly. "This is a Hospital Wing, a place of healing. If you can't lower your voice, Professor Snape, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

Snape stormed out from behind the curtains, his face red with anger. Freddie jumped slightly as he stomped over to her, yanking the curtains around her bed. He picked up the goblet of Calming Draught and took a sip before handing it to Freddie, taking the other empty goblet from her.

"Drink that," he said irritably, sinking into the chair beside her bed.

She nodded obediently and drank the potion. She watched him rub his face with one hand, like he was trying to wipe away his anger. He dropped his hand and saw her watching him.

"Lay down," he snapped, then softened his tone. "Get some rest, Gray. You'll be okay."

"Thank you," she said softly as she lay back on the pillow. He said nothing but watched her until her eyes closed and the potion carried her off to sleep.

**Author's Note: I couldnt leave yall hanging too long after that last chapter! Getting some more typed up now. Also totally unrelated but yours truly is in an absolutely FANTASTIC mood becauuuuuse...my best friend got me and her tickets to see My Chemical Romance in September at a two day music festival in Atlanta! I am so excited, I feel like a teenager right now (I am 26)! lol **


	49. Chapter 49

Freddie woke a couple of hours later, alone. Snape was gone and she didn't see Madam Pomfrey anywhere. The ward was dark, the only light coming from the windows and a few sparse candles. She got out of bed, biting back a groan of pain. She got her wand off the bedside table and looked around. The curtains were still drawn around Geck's bed and she didn't see anyone else. She looked around once more, then left the Hospital Wing.

She walked down the stairs to the ground floor, feeling bruised all over. Even though she was still hurting, she didn't want to stay in the Hospital Wing. It brought back too many memories. She didn't need to be watched and she wasn't tired anyway.

She bypassed the Common Room and headed for Snape's office. She didn't want to go to her dorm on the off chance that anyone was still awake and wanted to ask her questions. She figured she could brew a potion or two and take her mind off things, keep her occupied til morning.

She removed the ward from Snape's door and stepped inside. She stopped short when she found Snape sitting at his desk, a half-empty bottle of scotch in front of him. They locked eyes, both looking surprised to see the other.

"I thought you'd be asleep," she managed finally.

"I'm not. _You _should be," he said, his speech slightly slurred. "You are supposed to be in the Hospital Wing."

"I can't stay there," she said, shaking her head. "It...I really hate hospitals."

"Me too," he said, still slurring.

_He's drunk_, she realized.

"You shouldn't be here," he continued. "You are injured and need to be monitored."

"I'm fine," she scoffed. "I'm just going to brew some potions or something til morning."

"No," he said, standing up. He stumbled slightly as he took a few steps over, blocking her way into the lab.

"_No_?" she asked, stopping in front of him and crossing her arms. "What do you mean _no_?"

"I mean no," he said. "You are in no state to brew anything. You're injured and need to rest."

She scoffed and turned to walk away but he grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him.

"Where do you think you're going?" he asked, his face inches from hers. She could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"To my dorm, since you won't let me brew."

"I don't think so," he said, his hand still gripping her arm tightly.

"I'm not going back to the Hospital Wing," she said stubbornly. "You can't make me."

"Actually I _could_," he said, squeezing her arm tighter. "I could tie you up and drag you back, if I wanted to."

She glared up at him a moment, then smirked slightly.

"You want to tie me up?" she asked sardonically.

His black eyes glittered as he stared down at her. He tightened his grip on her arm even more and she let out a soft gasp.

"You're hurting my arm," she said quietly.

He immediately released her and a flash of something like guilt crossed his face. He turned away from her and walked over to the fireplace. He leaned one arm against the mantle and stared into the flames. Freddie didn't move but watched him, curious and confused.

When he turned back around he picked up his glass of scotch and took a deep drink. He put the empty glass aside and picked up his wand. He stumbled back towards her and waved his wand. A cot appeared right inside the doorway of the lab.

"You can sleep here," he said. "Where I can keep an eye on you."

"...But I'm not tired," she said, though she wasn't opposed to the idea of sleeping in his office.

"I'll get you a Sleeping Draught. Lay down," he ordered.

Freddie sat on the edge of the cot and unlaced her boots, watching as Snape went into his quarters.

"Do you have a pillow?" she asked as she pulled off her boots. She pulled Hemlock from her pocket and grew him to full size.

Snape reappeared in the doorway with a pillow and the green blanket she'd seen on the back of the couch the last time she'd gotten a glimpse into his room. He stumbled across the room and dropped the pillow and blanket on the cot next to her, then handed her a small vial of Sleeping Draught. She looked up at him, noticing the slight flush on his normally pale cheeks, probably from the scotch. He had bags under his eyes as well.

"You look like you need this more than I do," she said quietly.

"Drink it," he said, returning to his desk. "Don't worry about me, little girl."

Freddie smiled slightly and uncorked the vial. She downed the potion quickly then lay down on the pillow and pulled the blanket over her. She breathed deeply and realized the pillow smelled of Snape. So did the blanket.

_Is this his pillow? _She thought drowsily as the potion began to work its magic.

"What's gonna happen to Geck?" she asked, her voice thick with sleepiness.

Snape looked down at her, his face flushed with anger for a brief moment.

"He has been banned from the Prefect's bathroom, removed from his position as Quidditch Captain, and lost 200 house points from Ravenclaw. He was also found to have several bottles of Firewhiskey in his possession, which is contraband for students within the castle. He is not allowed to leave his Common Room, except to go to class for the rest of the year. If I'd had it my way he would have been expelled," he said darkly.

"Heard you yelling," she said thickly, fighting to keep her eyes open.

"For all the good it did," he snorted. "I may not be his Head of House, but I assure you, Winifred, I will make his life a living _Hell_."

Hearing Snape swear woke her up just a bit. She raised her head to look at him but dropped it back on the pillow.

"How?" she asked. "He's not in your class anymore."

"I have my ways," he said mysteriously as her eyes closed. "Trust me."

"I do," Freddie mumbled as she drifted off to sleep.

#

Freddie woke to the sound of something beeping. It wasn't her watch. She groaned when she opened her eyes, a pain in her head making her wince. She lifted her head and saw Snape slumped over his desk. It was his watch that was beeping.

"Severus?" she said sleepily, but he didn't stir. She sat up, pulling the blanket around her shoulders. She stood up, feeling dizzy as she did so. She steadied herself against his desk and tapped his shoulder.

"Severus?" she repeated, concerned.

She poked him a little harder. He sat up suddenly with a shout and Freddie jumped back, nearly falling over.

"Sorry!" she yelped. "Sorry, sorry. Jeez, I thought you were dead!"

"Wh- Winifred? What?" he said groggily, looking around.

"Your watch is beeping. I think it's morning," she said, her head swimming as she made her way back to the cot. She sat down, putting her hand to the back of her head. It was tender to touch.

"Are you okay?" Snape asked, rubbing his eyes.

"Dizzy," she admitted. "And sore."

He stood up from his desk and with a wave of his wand revealed the entrance to his quarters and disappeared inside. Freddie remained sitting on the cot, feeling sore all over. Snape reappeared with several potions. He set them on his desk, then drank two of them. He picked up the third bottle and conjured a teaspoon.

"This is a very strong Pain-Relieving Potion," he said, walking over to her and kneeling next to the cot. "Dosage is very important. A teaspoon should suffice."

He poured the potion carefully and held the spoon out to her. She opened her mouth and he put the spoon in. She wrinkled her nose at the bitter flavor and swallowed.

Snape chuckled slightly as he re-corked the vial. He stowed it in his pocket and pulled out a jar of Bruise Cream.

"For your face. May I?" he asked, unscrewing the cap.

"Of course. ...Does it look bad?"

"No," he said immediately, dabbing his fingers into the cream.

"You're lying."

"You cannot possibly know that. Now, shut up and hold still."

Freddie closed her mouth and watching him as he delicately spread the cream across her face. His eyes were intense, focused on the task. His touch made her tingle all over or maybe it was the potion. It was making her feel light-headed in a not-unpleasant way.

"Lay down on your stomach," he said.

Freddie just grinned at him.

"So I can put this on your neck, Gray," he clarified.

"Oh. Of course," she said and lay down on her stomach. He moved her braid aside and gently brushed the stray strands of hair off the back of her neck. She couldn't suppress a soft moan and his hand froze a moment at the base of her neck.

He pulled his hand away and for a moment she worried he wasn't going to do it. Then he brought his fingers back, dripped in ointment. He spread the cream across her neck and she let out a soft hum of pleasure. She began to feel drowsy again, with her face pressed into Snape's pillow, breathing in his scent, his soft hands gently touching her neck.

"I dunno if I can go to class like this," she murmured, her voice muffled by the pillow.

"I do not expect you to," he said and she turned her head to see him screwing the cap back on the Bruise Cream. "Stay here and rest. I will let Madam Pomfrey know that you are okay and I will check on you later, after my class."

"Normally I would argue, but," she yawned and stretched out on the cot. "I feel too good to argue."

"Perhaps I should drug you more often," he joked. He put the potion and the Bruise Cream on his desk, then walked back over to her. He pulled the green blanket over her, then picked up Hemlock and tucked him into her arms.

"Thanks, Severus," she said, grinning foolishly.

"Get some rest, Miss Gray," he said, heading for the door. "I will check on you later."

Freddie watched him get his cloak and fasten it around his neck. He waved his wand to close the entrance to his quarters, much to her disappointment, then he left the room. She stretched again on the cot, still smiling. Her whole body felt like it was floating.

_That Pain-Relieving Potion really is something, _she thought, hugging Hemlock to her chest. His fur felt extra soft and she rubbed her face against the kneazle. _I haven't felt this good in ages – maybe ever. No wonder the recipe for this potion indicates a potential for abuse. _

She tried to remember the recipe for the Pain-Relieving Potion, but her brain felt muddled.

_I could get up and look for it...but I feel sooo comfortable, _she thought and surprised herself by yawning. _Severus is right, I should go back to sleep...and he's gonna come check on my between classes. _

She grinned wider.

_He's such a sweetheart. He saved my life last night. He took care of me. He yelled at Dumbledore because I was attacked. Then he stayed up all night watching over me while I slept – until he passed out anyway. _

She lifted her head to look at the bottle of scotch on Snape's desk. It was empty.

_He probably wouldn't have let me stay if he'd been sober. Bless his heart. He really did save my life last night. If Moaning Myrtle hadn't gone to him, if he hadn't pulled me out of the tub, he – he saw me naked!_

Freddie bolted upright on the cot, then began to laugh.

_He saw me naked! I wish I'd been conscious for that!_

She lay back down, still giggling.

_I wonder what he thought about that? Did that give him pause? I wonder if he thinks I'm attractive..._

Freddie drifted back off with thoughts of Snape in her mind.


	50. Chapter 50

#

She didn't wake again for several hours. She rolled over a few times, feeling blissfully comfortable, and went back to sleep each time. When she did finally get up, it was the smell of food and her growling stomach that woke her. She opened her eyes to see Snape was sitting at his desk. She sat up, stretching, and saw he had a plate of food in front of him.

"I thought you were teaching," she said, pulling the blanket around her shoulders as she stood up, leaving Hemlock on the cot.

"I was. It is lunchtime now," he said. "I checked on you between classes – you were snoring."

"Wh- I don't snore!" she declared, feeling her cheeks flush as she sat in her chair in front of his desk.

"How would you know?" he quipped, arching his eyebrow. "It's a wonder you don't wake yourself up. It was like a freight train."

"Shut up!" she yelped, blushing harder. "It must have been the potion. A side effect or whatever."

He smirked at her.

"Are you hungry?" he inquired.

"Starving," she answered, her eyes on the chicken salad sandwich and chips on his plate. He pushed his plate across the desk to her. She quickly devoured the rest of his sandwich and chips, not caring that he was watching her eat.

"It is good to see your appetite has returned," he remarked. "How are you feeling?"

She shrugged and finished off the last of the chips.

"Your face looks better," he said. "How's your head?"

"I thought you said it didn't look bad?" she protested, reaching across the desk to steal his goblet of juice. She quickly drank it down. "I'm fine. My head is fine."

"Good. Last night's events have caused quite the stir around the castle."

"How so?"

"Tensions are rising between houses. I have given four students detention already this morning for fighting in the halls."

"What? They're fighting because of _me_?"

"Because of Mr Gecker's attack on you. Your fellow Slytherins have rallied behind you. There have been quarrels between Slytherin and Ravenclaw houses all morning."

"Rallied behind me?" she repeated. "Where were they six months ago?"

She couldn't help but feel annoyed. He shrugged slightly and Freddie blew out a sigh, sinking back in the chair.

"They're fighting because of me... I don't know how to feel about that."

"You do not have to feel any particular way about it. It's not your fault."

"It wasn't any of my Potions students was it?" she asked, suddenly concerned. "Amelia and the others – my 'fan club'?"

"No. Miss Hicks and Mr Harrow from Slytherin House. Mr Perkins and Samson from Ravenclaw."

"Maggie? She used to be my friend but she hasn't talked to me since Daniel disappeared. Who's Harrow?"

"He is a fifth year, Thomas Harrow. I believe he and Miss Hicks are dating."

"Why would they fight for me?" she asked, shaking her head. "I don't understand."

"I have never understood children," he said. The bell rang, signaling the end of the lunch period. "You should return to your dormitory."

"I should change and go to Transfiguration. McGonagall-"

"Minerva will understand," he said smoothly. "You may take the day off to recover."

"But I'm-"

"I will have one of your classmates bring you your homework. Come – I will escort you back to your Common Room," he said, standing up from his desk.

"You don't have to do that," she protested.

"I insist. Come."

Freddie stood with a sigh. She walked over to the cot and picked up Hemlock. She shoved her feet into her boots then turned to go.

"My blanket, Miss Gray," he said.

"Oh," she said, pulling the blanket from around her shoulders and laying it on the cot. "I'm still wearing your cloak, do you want it back too?"

"It has your blood on it. You may keep it. I have others," he said dismissively.

"All of them black?" she asked, grinning. "I don't think I've ever seen you wear anything that wasn't black...except your pajamas."

"Come along, Miss Gray. You're going to make me late."

"_You _are going to make you late," Freddie said, following him out of the office. "I don't need an escort."

"I disagree," he said, leading her down the corridor.

Snape walked quickly and Freddie had to almost jog to keep up. They passed by several students who were on their way to classes. They all stared, as usual, but this time the Slytherins gave her quick smiles before hurrying on their way.

Snape and Freddie stopped outside the entrance to the Common Room and he gave the password.

"What am I supposed to do all day?" Freddie asked.

"Rest."

"I've slept half the day already. I'm not tired. Can't I go back to the lab and brew something?" she pleaded.

"Later," he said. "After dinner."

"Why not now?"

"_Winifred_," he said, exasperated. "Relax. Read a book, do homework, I don't care just stay in your Common Room. I have to go."

"Fine," she huffed. "See you later."

Snape waited and watched her enter the Common Room before he turned and walked away.

_He's trying to protect me, _she thought as she entered the Common Room. _I can't decide if it's endearing or annoying...probably a bit of both._

"Freddie!"

Freddie froze as Maggie and Christine came rushing over to her.

"Are you okay? Your face!"

"I'm fine," Freddie said tensely. "...I heard you got detention for fighting some Ravenclaw boys."

"Yeah, only cuz Professor Sprout caught us," Maggie said. "I can't believe Gecker _attacked _you!"

"In the _bathtub_!" Christine interjected. "You couldn't even defend yourself!"

"It's been an all out war with Ravenclaw since we heard," Maggie said.

"Perkins tried to hex me in the corridor before lunch – don't worry, I got him and his buddies with a few Leg-Locker Curses. _And _I didn't get caught," Christine said smugly.

"Uh...shouldn't you guys be in Transfiguration?" Freddie asked, not sure what to say to them.

"Yeah, we were just leaving. You coming?"

"Nah. I've been ordered to 'rest'," she said, rolling her eyes. "Will you bring me the homework from McGonagall?"

"Course we will. We better run, before Maggie gets another detention," Christine teased.

"Shut up," Maggie said, smacking her arm lightly. "See you later Freddie. Glad you're okay!"

"Later," Freddie said dubiously as they hurried out the door.

Freddie hurried to her dorm before anyone else could try to talk to her. She took Hemlock from her pocket, grew him, and put him on her bed. She took off Snape's cloak and looked at it. There was a dark spot on the end of it where he'd used it to stem the flow of blood from her nose last night. She used her wand to clean the stain, then folded the cloak and put it on her bedside table. She smiled slightly, pleased that he had given it to her.

She went into the bathroom that was connected to the dorms and checked her reflection in the mirror. She winced at what she saw. Most of her face was covered with a yellowing bruise. She touched it gingerly, imagining how much worse it must have looked this morning. She tried to see the back of her neck but couldn't. She imagined it must look about like her face.

She went back to her bed and sat down with a sigh. She picked up Hemlock and fiddled with his soft, tufted eats. Then she picked up her bag and riffled through it. She had Charms homework she could do.

_I guess it beats just sitting here, _she thought with another sigh. Then she realized something was missing. _The Book of Potions! Severus must have it. At least, I hope he does. Unless someone stole it from me in the Hospital Wing... Severus probably picked it up before he left me there. _

She arranged her pillows and made herself comfortable before settling in to do her homework.


	51. Chapter 51

**Author's Note: Thank you all for giving me such great reviews! The more yall do that, the more it makes me want to write and update! Especially when I get reviews within minutes of updating, it is truly wonderful and puts me in a great mood 😁 So I wont make yall wait til tomorrow for another update 😉**

#

Freddie had finished her homework and was flipping through a Potions book, looking for ideas, when someone came rushing into the room.

"Freddie, you're alive!"

"Hey, Amelia," Freddie said with a smile.

She marked her spot in the book and set it down as Amelia approached. She patted the bed, inviting the younger girl to sit down.

"My God, your face! You look, uh..."

"Like Hell?" Freddie finished with a smile. "I know. I'm okay, though."

"I heard what happened – everyone did! I can't believe it! He attacked you while you were naked?"

"Yeah. I almost don't believe it myself," she said softly. "We used to be friends..."

"_Why _did he attack you?"

"He thinks I killed Daniel," she said quietly and Amelia's eyes grew wide. "I didn't kill him, Amelia. I know you've never asked, but I didn't do it. He was..._is _my best friend."

"You don't know what happened to him?"

"No. I can't remember anything. We were hanging out, talking...then I was in the Hospital Wing."

"They think you're faking it."

"I guess," she said, shrugging uncomfortably. "I...everyone thinks he's dead, that I killed him, but... I don't think he's dead. I'd...I'd know if he were dead. I can't explain it."

"What do you think happened to him?"

"I don't know. I wish I did, but... Shouldn't you be in class?" she asked, wanting desperately to change the subject.

"Study period."

"Then shouldn't you be studying?" she asked curtly.

Amelia's face fell slightly and Freddie immediately regretted being short with her.

"You have any homework you want me to help with?" Freddie offered and Amelia's blue eyes brightened.

"I've got an essay I have to write for Care of Magical Creatures."

"What's the topic?"

"Hippogriffs."

"I can help with that," she said with a nod. "Get your things, we can work on it in here."

"Okay," she said happily. "Be right back."

Freddie smiled slightly as she rearranged her pillows again, making room for Amelia to sit next to her. She lit another lantern so they'd have more light to see by. When Amelia returned with her bag she kicked off her shoes and sat cross-legged on the bed next to Freddie.

"I've got a pretty good handle on it I think but if you can read over it when I'm done that'd really help," she said, pulling out her books.

"No problem. Do you like music?" she asked, getting up off the bed and going to her trunk to get the record player.

"Sure. I like Spellbound and Lorean d'Eath. He's pretty sexy, don't you think? Even though he's part vampire."

"Mm. Have you ever heard of the Eagles?" she asked, putting on the vinyl.

"No, are they new?"

"No," she chuckled. "They're an old Muggle band."

"You listen to Muggle music?" she asked incredulously.

"Give it a chance. I think you'll like it."

#

When the bell rang for dinner, Freddie was laying across her bed, reading _Apothecary Now, _while Amelia sat at the head of the bed flipping through a magazine. They'd finished her essay and were listening to Guns and Roses.

"Ooo _Witch Weekly _has a sex horoscope," Amelia said, laying across the bed to show Freddie her magazine. "Wanna know if you're gonna get laid?"

"I don't need a psychic to know the answer to that," Freddie snorted. "It's a big fat no."

"Let's see what the stars say, shall we? February 13th makes you...an Aquarius. It says 'After a long, hard, emotionally draining season, this weekend's astrological weather helps you come out of your shell and have some fun again. Go out, find someone sexy, and take them home to pound out all the stress," Amelia said, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. Freddie made a face at her.

"You know that's all rubbish, right?" Freddie said, pushing the magazine away. Amelia giggled and sat back up.

"Mine says 'For the next month you have the opportunity to cement something special with a person who has all it takes to go the distance'. I _wish_," she said, closing the magazine with a wistful sigh.

"Do you not have a boyfriend?" Freddie asked, rolling over and closing her journal.

"Uh, _no_," Amelia said, rolling her eyes. "Don't you think you would know if I was dating?"

"Eh, I don't pay that much attention to students," she said. She realized she sounded like Snape and smiled, picking up Hemlock. "So, why don't you have a boyfriend? You're pretty, you could have your pick of the lot."

"You really think I'm pretty?" Amelia asked, blushing slightly as she tucked her curly brown hair behind her ear.

"Well yeah. Is there a boy you like? Maybe I could help you talk to him – although, people don't really like talking to me. I could threaten him, scare him into dating you," she joked.

"No, I'm good," she said with a laugh. "What about you? Any boy you're interested in?"

"Nah, only thing I'm interested in is Potions," she replied, tapping the copy of _Apothecary Now _she'd been reading.

"Figures," she chuckled. "You wanna go down to dinner? I'm starving."

"Me too, but Snape said I could come brew something after dinner so I'm going to head down there."

"But you said he said _after _dinner," she said, packing up her books.

"I like to keep him on his toes," she said with a wink. "Besides, sometimes he lets me eat dinner with him in his office."

"Ah. Well, here," she said, handing her a half-empty box of chocolates from her bag. "In case he starves you."

"Thanks," she said with a grin. "I'm gonna get changed – I've been wearing these clothes since yesterday."

"Alright, I'll see ya later. Thanks for helping with my homework."

"No problem," Freddie said, pulling the curtains around her bed then paused. "Hey Amelia?"

"Yeah?"

"You haven't been mixed up with any of these fights with Ravenclaw, have you?"

"Uhh..." she hesitated a moment. "Well I heard a Ravenclaw girl bad-mouthing you in the first floor bathroom earlier."

"What did you do?" she asked sharply.

"Hexed her mouth shut," she said. "Don't worry – I didn't get caught! I was in a stall, they didn't even see me."

"Avery," she sighed. "I don't need anyone fighting on my behalf. Stay out of trouble, okay?"

"Okay," Amelia agreed with a nod, then left the room.

Freddie took off her clothes from the night before. She put on clean underwear, a pair of black lace panties.

_Just in case Amelia's horoscope thing is accurate, _she thought with a chuckle.

She dressed in black slacks and a short sleeve black shirt with the top two buttons undone, showing off a moderate amount of cleavage. She grabbed Snape's cloak from her bedside table and fastened it around her neck. It dragged the ground a couple of inches on her so she used her wand to adjust it, then left her dorm, grabbing Hemlock and shoving him in her pocket on the way out.

She stepped out of the Common Room into the corridor...and found Snape leaning against the opposite wall.

"What are you doing?" Freddie asked, surprised.

"Waiting for you," he answered shortly.

"Why? I don't need a babysitter," she said, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Do you want to brew a potion or not?" he asked. Freddie didn't miss the slight note of tiredness in his voice.

_Of course he's tired, he was up all night drinking and watching over me. He's probably exhausted, _she realized.

"Yeah," she said. "Yeah, let's go."

He inclined his head and led the way down the hall.

"Did you get the mice?" she asked as they entered his office.

"Mice?" he repeated.

"To test my potion? You said we could."

He paused a moment before sinking down into his chair.

"I forgot," he admitted. "It has been a long day. I will get them tomorrow."

"I could go get-"

"No," he interrupted.

"But-"

"No, Miss Gray. Bottle your Saxum Brew and chose something else to brew tonight. We can test them tomorrow."

Freddie sighed softly and went into the lab. She bottled her potion from the night before then stepped back out into the office. The cot was gone and the door to Snape's quarters was open. Curious, she peeked inside to see him folding the green blanket and placing it on the leather couch.

"Do you have the _Book of Potions_?" she asked, lingering in the doorway.

"On my desk," he answered without looking up. Freddie watched him a moment longer as he took the pillow she'd slept on and tossed it on his bed.

She walked back out to his desk, found the book, and sat in her usual chair as she began to flip through it. Snape came out, closing the door to his quarters behind him. He sank back into his chair with an almost inaudible sigh. Freddie looked at him over the top of the book. The bags under his eyes were darker, more pronounced than before, and his face was even paler than usual.

"Are you okay?" she asked quietly.

"Mm. The Invigoration Draught I took this morning has worn off," he said, rubbing his face tiredly.

"Want me to get you another one?" she offered.

"No, I don't want to be up all night again."

"How about some tea? Or – here," she said, pulling the box of chocolates from her pocket. "Have some chocolate."

"Where did you get these?" he asked sharply, becoming more alert as he took the box from her.

"Amelia gave them to me. Amelia Avery," she said, confused. He pulled out his wand and waved it over the box. He opened it, broke one of the pieces in half, and sniffed it.

"It's not poisoned," Freddie said, rolling her eyes.

"You cannot be too careful," he said, popping the chocolate into his mouth then giving the box back to her.

"Amelia's a friend, not foe," she said, shaking her head.

"You believed Mr Gecker to be a friend also."

"Six months ago, maybe. Now...I think Amelia may be the only friend I have, besides you."

He looked up at her, eyebrows raised.

"Am I your friend?" he asked sardonically.

"Friend, teacher, fellow potioneer...savior," she said, shrugging. "You saved my life last night. You pulled me out of the water."

"I did."

"You saw me naked."

"I-" he paused a beat and she saw his face turn red for a brief second. "I was more focused on saving your life. Go – go brew a potion, Gray."

She grinned at him and stood, taking the book with her.

"Shut the door behind you," he said as she walked into the lab. "I have two of your housemates coming to serve detention after dinner."

"You're not going to be too hard on them, are you?" she asked, pausing in the doorway.

"Lines," he replied.

"My worst nightmare."

"You are a very unusual individual, Miss Gray. Get to work."

"Yes sir," she said, smirking at him as the door shut behind her.


	52. Chapter 52

#

Freddie decided to brew Zygmunt Budge's version of the Shrinking Solution. It was an easy enough recipe but she was curious to see what tips the disembodied author would have for her. Plus it would be an easy potion to test if Snape ever got the mice from McGonagall.

Freddie worked on the potion, following the directions that appeared in Budge's handwriting. When the potion had to stew for a while, she cleared her workstation, then pressed her ear to the door. She could hear Snape periodically barking at the students. Things like "get back to work" and "be quiet".

She walked back over to the table and sat down on the stool with a sigh.

_He's so tired and grouchy. I wish there was something I could do to help. It's my fault he didn't sleep, he was worried about me. _She smiled slightly to herself. _He was worried about me. He cares about me, whether he wants to or not. He-_

"Are you finished with your potion?"

She looked up to see him standing in the doorway, an irritable look on his face.

"Are they gone?" she asked, standing up from her stool.

"Yes. Your potion?"

"It has 20 more minutes to brew," she answered. "Are you sure you don't want some tea or-"

"What I want, Miss Gray, is to go to bed."

"Well don't let me keep you. You can go to sleep, I'll finish this off and bottle it up before I leave."

He said nothing and didn't move from the doorway. She crossed her arms and looked up at him.

"It's just a Shrinking Solution, I'm not going to mess it up or – or blow up the lab. You don't have to stay and watch me."

"It's not that," he said, looking uncomfortable.

"What then?" she asked, tilting her head.

"I want to ensure you return to your Common Room safely."

"It's right down the hall, in the dungeons. What could happen?"

He didn't answer but looked down at her, his face unreadable.

"You're worried about me?" she asked, smiling slightly.

"Dead students make for tedious paperwork," he replied shortly. "And it would be inconvenient to lose my assistant at this point."

"Right," she snorted, then looked up at him seriously. "I'll be fine, Severus. I'll keep my wand out and be alert. I'll be fine – I have my clothes on this time."

The corners of his mouth twitched slightly but he didn't look convinced.

"I'll be fine," she insisted. "Go to bed. You look like shit."

"Language, Miss Gray – don't make me deduct house points," he warned, but turned and walked away. Freddie followed him and watched him open the door to his quarters.

"Goodnight Professor," she said quietly. "Sleep well."

"Thank you, Miss Gray. You too," he said, so softly she could barely hear him. Then the door to his quarters shut and she was alone.

Freddie finished up her potion and bottled it. She cleaned up the cauldron and left the lab. She lingered in Snape's office a moment, wondering if he were asleep on the other side of the hidden door.

She walked around his desk, wishing she had something to leave him to brighten his day when he woke up. There was a blank piece of parchment on his desk. She smiled to herself and picked up a quill. She wrote the words 'Good morning' in large letters and drew a smiley face.

_Maybe that'll make him smile, _she thought as she left his office and sealed the door behind herself. _He'll act annoyed of course but maybe he'll smile. _

She kept her wand out as she walked down the corridor. The hallway was empty but she still felt tense. She listened intently for the sound of footsteps, looked for anything out of the ordinary.

_There could be someone hiding behind any corner, behind that suit of armor..._

She held her wand at the ready as she passed the decorative suit of armor, half expecting someone to jump out at her. There was no one there.

_I'm being paranoid, _she thought as she reached the Common Room and gave the password to enter. _Severus is making me paranoid. I probably wouldn't have thought twice about walking back to my dorm if he hadn't been so protective...but that's probably a good thing. I do need to be more alert._

Freddie entered her dorm to find Maggie and Christine sitting together on Maggie's bed. They greeted her when she entered and she noticed Christine had a cut on her forehead.

"What happened to you?" Freddie asked, grabbing her bag from beside her bed and digging for her Potions kit.

"Two seventh year Ravenclaw girls attacked me after dinner," Christine explained. "They followed me out onto the grounds and jumped me."

"Bloody hell. Did you report them?" she asked, finding her bottle of essence of dittany. She conjured a clean rag and walked over to Maggie's bed.

"Nah. I gave worse than I got," she said proudly as Freddie poured dittany onto the cloth. "Besides, I didn't want to get detention – ouch!"

"Hold still," Freddie said, holding the rag against Christine's head. "You don't want it to scar."

"Detention wasn't so bad," Maggie said. "Snape only made us do lines, it wasn't even a full hour, then Tommy and I snuck off for a little alone time."

Maggie and Christine shared a grin.

"Snape seemed like he was in a bad mood – worse than usual that is. I saw him earlier, outside the Common Room," Christine said.

"He's not mad at us," Maggie said, shaking her head. "He's mad at Ravenclaw for what they did to you, Freddie."

Freddie shrugged uncomfortably and checked the wound on Christine's head. It was no longer bleeding and the skin had mended.

"I heard he gave six more Ravenclaw students detention this afternoon," Christine added. "He's _pissed _about what Gecker did to Freddie."

"Snape really likes you," Maggie said to Freddie.

"He'd feel that way if _any _Slytherin student were attacked," she argued, although she wasn't sure that was true.

"No way," Maggie declared. "He spends most of his time with you, he lets you help him teach, you stay out after hours with him."

"He's gotten used to me, that's all. I'm his apprentice."

"Nah, he _definitely _likes you," Christine said, sharing another grin with Maggie.

"Maybe he does but not like _that_, not in a weird way," she defended. "I'm just a good apprentice."

_The last thing I need are people spreading rumors about 'me and Snape' especially when there is no 'me and Snape', _she thought irritably.

"Your his Potions Princess," Maggie said, grinning broadly. "You always have been."

"Your head's fine now, Christine," Freddie said, rolling her eyes at Maggie. "I'm going to bed. I need sleep."

"Goodnight."

"Night Freddie. Thanks for patching me up."

"No problem. Goodnight."

Freddie pulled the curtains around her bed and got undressed. She put on her green satin pajama set and climbed into bed, wishing she still had Snape's blanket to cover up with instead of her quilt. She pulled Hemlock to her chest and sighed deeply. Startled, she realized that the kneazle smelled like Snape. _From sleeping on the cot, under his blanket with me, _she realized. Smiling she pressed her face into the kneazle's soft fur and breathed deeply again. She kept him held close as she drifted off to sleep.


	53. Chapter 53

The next morning after Freddie got dressed she was about to leave the Common Room when Amelia came running up to her.

"Oh good, I caught you," she said, panting slightly.

"I'm on my way to Herbology – shouldn't you be in class?"

"Yeah, I know – Professor Snape, he gave me a pass. He wants me to walk you down to Herbology, make sure you get there safely."

"What?! That's so – so unnecessary!"

"I think it's sweet," Amelia said with a grin. "He's worried about you."

"Ridiculous," she snorted. "Absolutely ridiculous. Go to class, Amelia, I'll be fine."

"Uh, no," Amelia said, crossing her arms stubbornly. "No offense, but Professor Snape scares me _way _more than you do."

Freddie couldn't help but chuckle slightly.

"Fine. Come on then, I don't want to be late," she said, motioning for her to follow her.

They left the dungeons and crossed the Entrance Hall. As they walked out the castle Freddie glanced back at Amelia. She had her wand out and had a serious, vigilant look on her face.

"You're taking this _far _too seriously, Amelia," she said, shaking her head.

"I'll hex anyone who so much as _looks _at you funny," she vowed. "Professor Snape's orders."

"You'll do no such thing," she said sternly. "I can take care of myself and I don't want you getting into trouble."

"Well, at least I get to be late for Transfiguration," she said cheerfully. "Don't you think it's sweet he's looking out for you?"

"It's _annoying_," Freddie muttered.

"Well _I _think it's sweet," she said as they approached the greenhouse where the class was gathered. "It's good to know he has a soft side."

"Who has a soft side?" Maggie asked as they joined the crowd.

"Pr-"

Freddie clapped a hand over Amelia's mouth before she could say it.

"No one. Go to class, Avery," she said sternly.

"Yes ma'am," Amelia said, saluting her briefly then hurrying off across the grounds.

"Snape sent a fourth-year to walk you to class?"' Maggie asked dubiously. "What could she do against an attacker? Trip them?"

"She's a good kid," Freddie said, shaking her head. "She's just looking out for me."

"You mean _he _is," she said, grinning.

"I-"

"Good morning ladies and gentlemen," said Professor Sprout loudly as she approached the class, cutting their conversation short. "Let's get started..."

#

When Freddie left the greenhouse a little over an hour later, she was surprised to find Amelia waiting for her.

"Seriously?" Freddie asked incredulously.

"Seriously," Amelia said, nodding. "I'm to escort you to the Potions classroom."

"I'm gonna kill him," she said, shaking her head as she followed Amelia back towards the castle.

"Probably wouldn't let folks hear you saying stuff like that if I were you, Freddie," Maggie said, clapping her on the back. "Folks might get the wrong idea, you talking about killing people."

Freddie and Amelia shared a look. Amelia quickly looked away and Freddie gave Maggie a cold look. Her grin faltered and she stopped short a moment.

"Uh, I'm gonna go get cleaned up. Later, Freddie," Maggie said and quickly hurried off.

"I really hate people," Freddie muttered under her breath.

"Yeah," Amelia said with a sympathetic grimace. "Are you gonna help teach our class today?"

"Looks that way," she said.

When they reached the dungeons a few of Amelia's classmates were waiting outside the classroom in the corridor.

"Get in line, Miss Avery," Freddie said, bypassing the line. She entered the classroom and shut the door firmly behind her. "We need to talk."

Snape looked up at her from his desk, a quill in his hand.

"Good morning, Miss Gray," he said idly, dipping the quill in red ink and marking the paper in front of him.

"Why is there a fourth-year tailing me?" she demanded, leaning across his desk.

He looked up at her, his eyes lingering briefly on her chest – _looking down my shirt, _she realized – before flicking to her face.

"She's your friend, is she not? It's my understanding girls often travel together-"

"I do _not _need a babysitter – emphasis on _baby_. I can take care of myself. And I don't want her or anyone getting hurt if some piece of crap Ravenclaw _does _decide to try something," she said sternly. "She's just a child."

"So are you," he snorted.

"_Call her off_," Freddie said sternly.

Snape put his quill down and stood up, towering over her.

"Or what?" he said mockingly.

She glared up at him, knowing she had nothing to threaten him with and wouldn't even if she could. She felt her body flush as he looked down at her and she blew out a sigh. She stepped back from his desk and he sat down, smirking.

"You know they're talking about us – about _you_," she said.

"Who?"

"The students. Everyone."

"And what are they saying about me?" he asked dryly.

"That you've gotten soft. That you _care _about me," she teased, smirking.

His face soured.

"Dead students make for tedious paperwork."

"Uh-huh," she said, grinning wider. "You said that last night."

"Get out of my classroom, Miss Gray," he said darkly. "Go brew a potion or something. Away from me."

"Yes sir," she chuckled and turned to go.

"You may take Miss Avery with you," he said before she reached the door.

"Would that make you feel better?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Go," he said. "Teach her something."

Freddie chuckled to herself and left the classroom. She walked past the curious eyes of the young students and motioned to Amelia.

"You're with me, Miss Avery," she said lightly. Amelia picked her bag up off the floor and hurried after her.

"Where are we going?" she asked curiously.

"Private lesson," she said. "Unless you'd rather stay in class?"

"No way," she declared. "What are we going to brew?"

"I haven't decided yet. Any suggestions?"

Amelia dug her Potions textbook out of her bag and started to flip through it. She bumped into Freddie when she stopped outside of Snape's office. Freddie pulled out her wand and lifted the enchantment.

"Wow," Amelia said, following her inside. "He lets you use his office?"

"Yes. Do not tell anyone, understand?"

"I promise," she said solemnly.

Freddie smiled slightly and waved her wand, revealing the entrance to the Brewing Lab.

"Whoa," Amelia said, her blue eyes wide as they walked inside. "What _is _this place?"

"Professor Snape's private brewing lab. And mine. As his apprentice, I spend a lot of time here concocting complex brews."

"Ah, so _this _is where you're hiding when I can't find you."

"Probably. How about a Wit-Sharpening Potion?" Freddie suggested. "You won't find the recipe in your textbook. It's one you won't encounter until next year but I believe you can handle it, with my guidance."

_I sound like Severus_, she thought, amused.

"That'd be awesome!" Amelia declared. "Have you got a book with the recipe?"

"Even better," she said, pulling out a piece of parchment.

She wrote down the ingredients and the recipe. Amelia watched, wide-eyed.

"You have the recipe memorized?" she asked, awestruck.

"This isn't the only one. I repeat them in my head when I get stressed, especially medicinal ones. I plan on working at St Mungo's when I graduate next year."

"Cool!" she declared.

"The store cupboard is there. Start gathering your ingredients," she said, handing her the parchment.

"Yes ma'am."

As Amelia gathered her ingredients, Freddie got out her record player and set it up on the workstation. She put on the Eagles record as Amelia came back with her ingredients.

"You got everything? Then let's get started..."


	54. Chapter 54

#

Freddie was still in the lab that evening when Snape came in after his last class. Amelia had long since gone, having completed her potion. It had been a fun lesson and Amelia had been reluctant to leave her when it was time for Freddie to go to Defense Against Dark Arts.

The rest of her day had gone without incident and Freddie had returned to the lab to brew a potion she'd read about in the most recent edition of _Apothecary Now._

"You brewed a Wit-Sharpening Potion?" Snake asked, stepping into the lab and peering into the cauldron from earlier.

"No," she said, adding mint leaves to the cauldron she had over the fire. "Miss Avery brewed a Wit-Sharpening Potion."

"She did well."

"I know, I – _ha_! I've never heard you compliment someone other than myself before," she said, grinning.

"Her results are a by product of your instruction – a direct result of my own teaching skills," he said haughtily, walking over to her workstation.

"Of course," she said, rolling her eyes when his back was turned. "Anyway...I awarded her 20 house points and allowed her to take a bottle with her."

"Why?"

"She did a good job," she said with a shrug. "And she's got end of year exams coming up, she asked if she could have some and I said she could."

"Hmm," he said, and picked up the mortar she had been using to crush moth wings. "What are you working on?"

Freddie pulled the rolled up magazine from her pocket and handed it to him.

"An Invisibility Potion?" he asked interestedly, scanning the article.

"Created by Lady Karen Byrne, in Ireland. You didn't see it?"

"I have been busy. I haven't had a chance to read it yet. If I had I might have-"

"Brewed it yourself?" she finished, smiling at him. "You can help me if you want."

"I do not need your permission," he said, sitting down to measure the beetle eyes she would need next. "In fact, I _could _send you to bed and take over your potion myself."

"You wouldn't...would you?" she asked, looking across the room at him.

He glanced at her and smiled briefly.

"I won't," he said. "Come chop this mallowsweet."

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

They worked together flawlessly on the potion for over an hour, falling into their usual comfortable routine. When they reached a point where the potion had to stew for half an hour, Freddie set the alarm on her watch then followed Snape out into his office.

"Tea?" he asked as he sat at his desk.

"Yes please," she said, stretching before she took her seat. He watched her stretch, his eyes lingering on the exposed skin of her stomach as her shirt rode up.

"Noelle?" he called as Freddie sat. The house elf appeared with a crack. "Bring up a pot of tea. Number 36."

"Yes Master Snape," the elf said and disappeared.

Neither of them spoke until after Noelle returned with the glowing green teapot. Snape poured their tea as the elf vanished.

"Are you planning to go to the Quidditch match Saturday morning?"

"Uh _yes_. It's the final match of the season, Slytherin vs Ravenclaw. Of course I'm going," she said. "We're gonna slaughter them, especially now that Geck's barred from playing, we-... I don't need a protection detail, if that's what you're thinking."

"No, of course not. I'm _sure _the Ravenclaws will not have a score to settle with you after they lose," he said sarcastically.

She frowned at him, and sipped her tea. It was a green tea with a minty, sweet taste.

"Spearmint? And...honeysuckle," she identified.

"Indeed. My own spin on Maghrebi mint tea, which originated in Morocco."

"It's good," she said, taking another sip. "I think this is my favorite so far."

"Thank you," he said and took a sip of his tea, then paused a moment. "...I would be pleased to escort you to the match on Saturday."

"Oh would that _please _you?" she teased lightly and he scowled at her.

"Forget it," he muttered. "Let them curse you. I'll be glad to be rid of you."

"No, I'm sorry. Sorry," she said, fighting back a smile. "I will happily attend the match with you, sir."

He grunted but didn't say anything else as he continued to drink his tea. Freddie smiled to herself and pulled out her copy of _Apothecary Now _to browse through it while she drank her tea.

**Author's Note: You guys want a bunch of chapters again at once tonight? 😁 Comment if you do! (I know you do! lol)**


	55. Chapter 55

#

When her watch beeped, they both stood and carried their tea into the lab. They continued working, taking turns preparing and adding ingredients. Freddie added 2 sliced crocodile hearts, then washed her hands at the sink. She finished off her cup of tea and looked up to see Snape frowning at her.

"What?" she asked.

"That was my cup."

"No it wasn't."

"Yes it was. I placed my cup next to the mortar, yours is next to the scales."

"Hm. Sorry. I'll get you a refill."

She walked out into the office and refilled the cup from the glowing teapot. She smiled to herself as she poured the tea. Ever since his birthday any time they'd had tea together he'd used the pot she'd gifted him. _He likes it, _she thought with a smile.

She returned to the lab and gave Snape his tea. He took it but he was still frowning slightly and he didn't drink it.

"What?" she asked, looking up at him. "You scared of my germs?"

"Nothing about you scares me, little girl," he said, pushing her away. "Tend to your potion."

She wrinkled her nose at him, stick out her tongue, then went back to work.

It was late when they finished the potion, nearing midnight. Freddie checked the recipe. The brew in the cauldron was shimmering silver, swirling in an almost ectoplasmic looking way. It matched the description Lady Karen Byrne recorded in her recipe.

"Can I test it?" she asked, looking to Snape who was leaning against the workstations.

"I am fresh out of mice, I'm afraid."

"I meant on myself," she said, retrieving a ladle.

He looked hesitant, then shrugged. He tried to look indifferent but his dark eyes watched her intensely as she scooped up the potion and drank a spoonful. It had a bitter taste but was not totally unbearable.

She put the ladle down as her skin began to tingle. She looked down at her hands as her body felt cold...then she disappeared.

"It worked!" she said delightedly, looking down at her invisible body.

"Better than a Disillusionment Charm," Snape said, sounding impressed. "I can't see you at all."

Freddie grinned to herself and skirted around the cauldron. She moved silently and she could see Snape's eyes darting around, searching for her. She tiptoed over to him, grabbed his cloak and pulled it over his eyes, then danced away, laughing.

She stifled her laughter as he pulled his cloak back over his head.

"Winifred," he said, annoyed. "Where did you go?"

She didn't answer but silently moved to the workstation. She flicked a few beetle eyes at him then moved quickly away as he tried to grab her.

"I'm not playing this game with you, Winifred, it isn't funny," he growled.

_It is to me_, she thought as she moved stealthily across the room. He pulled out his wand, looking around the room. _That won't help you find me, Severus Snape. _

She let out a gasp as she felt him enter her mind. He rifled through her memories of the last few minutes, not giving her time to react or try to block him. Then it was as if he was looking through her eyes as he crossed the room. He severed the connection with her mind as he grabbed her and pinned her to the wall.

"That's cheating," she said, struggling against him. "You used Legilimency on me."

"I'm not playing," he said, his face inches from hers, even though she was invisible. She thought, briefly, about kissing him, but decided not to.

_He might _actually _kill me. _

"How long does it take to wear off?" he asked, keeping her pinned to the wall.

"An hour," she answered.

"Are you going to behave?" he asked. "Or do I need to keep you pinned here for the duration?"

_That wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, _Freddie thought, struggling against him and wedging her leg between his. He pressed her harder against the wall, like she expected he would. She grinned, glad she was invisible.

"Well?" he demanded, his breath hot on her face. His breath hot on her face. His breath smelled minty, from the tea. _I bet it would taste good if he did kiss me._

"I'm thinking about it," she said.

"Do I need to penetrate your mind again?"

She felt herself grow wet at the word 'penetrate' from his pale lips.

"I _really _think you do not want to do that," she said, smirking at his confused/annoyed look. "I'll behave. I promise."

He released her and stepped back, then turned and walked into his office.

"Can I go walk around the castle until it wears off?" she asked, following him.

"_How _is that behaving, Winifred?" he asked, sounding exasperated.

"Well," she said slowly. "I wouldn't be flicking things at you."

He looked at her – or towards her – annoyed. He was silent a minute, then exhaled slowly.

"I _could _go patrol the corridors for students breaking curfew," he said finally.

"And I can come?"

"_If _you stay close to me, stay quiet, and-"

"Behave?" she finished, smiling. "I will. I promise."

"Very well."

Freddie followed him out into the corridor happily.

"We will go patrol near Gryffindor Tower," he said. "They are notorious troublemakers."

"Maybe we'll find some students out of bed and give them detention," she said enthusiastically.

"_I _will give detention, you will stay hidden. Silent."

"Of course," she said, walking beside him.

She took his hand in hers and he looked down at her, disgusted.

"What do you think you're doing?" he asked.

"Sticking close to you," she answered innocently. "This way you will not lose me."

"Hmm," he said, but did not make her let go.

They left the dungeons and started up the staircase together. The castle was quit, there was no one else out.

"I thought you practiced Legilimency and Occlumency?" he asked quietly.

"I did," she answered, keeping her voice low.

"You did not defend your mind when I entered to determine your location."

"Well I learned Legilimency. Practiced on younger students until I got it right," she said. "But I never got the hang of Occlumency. With no one to defend my mind from, it's difficult to practice."

"Practice now. The trick is to clear your mind of all thought, all emotion."

Freddie tried but she was worried he would enter her mind again and what he would see if he did. Her thoughts, her private thoughts, fantasies...fantasies about him.

"I can't," she said, shaking her head. "I can't just think of nothing, how can you think of nothing, especially when you're trying to think of nothing then you automatically think of-"

"Shh," he said suddenly, squeezing her hand as he came to a stop on the stairs. "Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"Close your mouth and _listen_," he hissed.

Freddie did as told. She listened intently and heard a crashing sound from up the stairs.

"That didn't come from Gryffindor Tower," she said.

"No," he said. "It did not. Come."

Snape drew his wand as they quickly made their way to the fourth floor. They passed the entrance to the library, following the sound of spells being fired.

"Take that, fungus face!" said a voice.

"I'll kill you, Collins!"

Snape let go of Freddie's hand and pulled on a large mirror on the wall. It opened to reveal a secret room where four students were fighting. There were spells flying everywhere. Carson Maxwell and Owen Barker from Slytherin and Mitchell Collins and Lana Barlow from Ravenclaw. Maxwell had mushrooms sprouting all over his skin and Barlow's teeth had grown like a woodchuck's past her chin.

"_Enough!_" Snape bellowed and they all froze. A beam of light from Maxwell's wand flew up as he turned to face Snape and the spell hit the ceiling. There was a loud crack and dust began to fall from the ceiling.

"Get back!" Snape shouted as rubble began to fall, followed by large rocks. He jumped back and Freddie stood behind him, covering her face until the crashing sounds stopped. As the dust settled she grabbed Snape's hand and squeezed it, letting him know she was okay before dropping it.

"What's going on here?" Snape demanded as the students picked themselves up out of the rubble.

"They attacked us-" Barker began.

"The _hell _we did!" Collins interrupted.

"They lured us out-"

"Their idea-"

"They started it."

"And I am ending it," Snape said. "Detention, all of you, tomorrow evening in my office."

Freddie heard footsteps and stepped out of the way as Madam Pince, the librarian, came running in, followed by Filch.

"What happened here?" Madam Pince gasped.

"I believe Misters Maxwell, Barker, Collins and Miss Barlow snuck out of their dormitories for a duel," Snape said. "They'll be serving detention with me tomorrow evening. And I'll be deducting house points – 50, from each of you."

The students looked at each other sullenly. Maxwell glared daggers at the Ravenclaws.

"Maxwell, Barlow, Hospital Wing _now_ – Madam Pince will you escort them to prevent them from _killing one another _before they get there?" Snape asked.

"Of course, Professor."

"Mr Filch will you ensure the other two return to their dormitories?"

"Yes Professor Snape. Come on, you two," Filch growled.

Snape stood still, looking out over the caved-in room until everyone else was gone, then he turned to her.

"Winifred?" he said uncertainly.

"I'm here," she said, touching his arm so he would know where she was. He touched her invisible arm then, with surprising accuracy, reached out and cupped her face.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly.

"Y-yes," she said, surprised at his tender touch. "I'm fine. I was behind you when the ceiling fell."

"Good," he said, stroking her cheek gently with his thumb before dropping his hand and turning away. "This is a mess. Come. We should return to the dungeons."

Freddie followed Snape out of the room and back down the staircase. Neither of them spoke until they were back in his office.

"I believe I know what we need to do next," he said as he sat at his desk.

"Oh?" she said, her imagination running away with his words.

"We need to invent an antidote to this Invisibility Potion," he said.

"When? Tonight?"

"No, not tonight. It will take days, weeks possibly, to concoct an antidote. No doubt we will have many failures ahead of us before we get it right – if we ever get it right."

"We will," she said confidently. "You're brilliant, you can do anything, and I'm..."

"Naturally skilled," he finished. "And well-trained. By me."

"Of course," she chuckled.

"We can get started tomorrow evening. Your potion will wear off shortly. Return to your dormitory and get some sleep. I need you alert tomorrow."

"Yes sir," she said, standing up. "Goodnight, Professor."

"Goodnight, Miss Gray."


	56. Chapter 56

Saturday morning Freddie got up a little later than usual. She got dressed in an almost too short black skirt, a white button up top, and her Slytherin necktie to show house price for the upcoming Quidditch match. She headed down to breakfast where Amelia had saved her a seat. The entire table was decked out in silver and green.

"Hey Freddie!" Amelia said brightly as she sat down. "You going to the match or working on a secret potion?"

"It's not a secret. We're working on an antidote for the Invisibility Potion that just came out this month. But," she said, taking a bite of toast. "I'm actually going to the match. Professor Snape is...escorting me down."

She glanced at the staff table where he sat, talking with Dumbledore.

"Still protecting you?"

"He thinks he is," she said, rolling her eyes. "He thinks Ravenclaw might be out for blood after we whip their arses on the Quidditch pitch. They think it's my fault Geck got banned and now they're gonna lose."

"They were gonna lose anyway," Amelia said.

"I'll toast to that," Freddie said, raising her goblet.

They finished eating breakfast and some students started leaving the hall to head down to the Quidditch pitch. Freddie was finishing off her juice when Snape tapped her on the shoulder.

"Miss Gray," he said, then continued walking. Taking this to mean she should follow him, she put down her cup and hurried after him. She caught up with him in the Entrance Hall. He glanced over her briefly.

"Are you ready for the match?" he asked.

"Yep. You?"

"Let's go," he said and she followed him out of the castle.

They talked potions on their way down to the pitch, discussing the antidote they'd been experimenting with. They'd had three failures last night before he'd called it quits for the night and sent her to bed.

"Perhaps we should add the demiguise fur before the plangentine," she said as they walked. "I think adding it too close to the snakeweed caused our rather _explosive _failure last night."

"I agree. If we start with the demiguise fur and wait to add the snakeweed until after it stews a bit, we should be able to add wartizome to negate the combustible effects," he said. "Theoretically."

"Theoretically," she agreed. "It almost makes me wish we were working on that instead of going to a Quidditch match..._almost_."

"Do not worry, Miss Gray. We have plenty of time – and a few more mistakes ahead of us no doubt."

"Not that much time," she pointed out. "Less than a month before the end of term and I have to go home for the summer."

"That is unfortunate," he said. "But there is a chance we will accomplish our goal before the end of term."

"If we don't are you going to keep working on it without me?" she asked and he gave her a look. "Of course you are. You know I could keep working on it too. My uncle has let me brew potions in the kitchen before."

"You are free to do as you wish," Snape said dismissively. "Hopefully you do now blow yourself and your family up in the process."

She scoffed at him.

"Bet you'll be pissed when I figure it out before you," she teased.

"Oh _when _you do?" he sneered. "Awfully confident for an _amateur _potioneer such as yourself."

"Oh amateur?" she said, rounding on him as they approached the stands. "Would you waste your time with me if I were an amateur?"

He paused.

"I have no response to that," he admitted.

"Uh-huh," she said, grinning up at him. "I'll see you after the match?"

"No such luck. I am sitting with you," he said, following her into the stands.

"Lucky me," she said under her breath.

"Did you say something, Miss Gray?" he said as he followed her to a seat.

"Nope," she replied cheerfully as he sat down next to her. "You know, this is only going to make them gossip more about you?"

"Let them talk," he said dismissively. "I am here to watch the match."

"Then why aren't you sitting with the teachers?" she teased.

"I am supporting Slytherin House," he said and then leaned his head close to whisper to her. "Besides...Dumbledore wants me to keep an eye on you."

She made a disgusted face at him and Snape chuckled as he straightened up.

"Watch the match, Miss Gray," he said. "We have a potion to work on afterwards."


	57. Chapter 57

#

Freddie watched the match, eagerly cheering on her team. It didn't last long. Without their captain, Ravenclaw was less coordinated that usual. They'd suffered during the spring Quidditch season, having to train a new Keeper to take Daniel's place, and now that Geck had been barred from playing they had to get a new Seeker at the last minute. They never stood a chance.

As Freddie realized this, she stopped cheering. _If Daniel hadn't...none of this would have happened. How can I cheer for Slytherin when Ravenclaw is losing because of me?_

The stands erupted around her as Slytherin's Seeker, Brian O'Neil caught the snitch and ended the match. He was a fourth year, one of her Potions 'fan club' and she wanted to cheer for him but she felt a little sick to her stomach.

Snape stood, clapping loudly among the sea of green and silver, until he looked down and noticed Freddie wasn't moving.

"What's wrong, Gray?" he asked, having to shout over the cheering.

She just shook her head. Snape grabbed her arm and pulled her up from her seat. He pushed her ahead of him out of the stands.

"Quit shoving," she snapped at him as she nearly fell down the wooden stairs in front of him. He looked briefly surprised and released her arm.

When they reached the bottom of the stairs he grabbed her again and pulled her under the stands.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," she muttered, pulling her arm away from him.

"Winifred," he said, exasperated. "Tell me."

She shook her head. He let out a frustrated growl, turned, and walked away from her. Freddie hesitated a moment, then followed him. He stayed a few steps ahead of her and she didn't catch up with him until they reached his office in the dungeons.

"Sit," he said, pointing to the chair in front of his desk. "Talk."

"There's nothing to talk about," she said, sinking down in the chair.

"Winifred," he said sharply, the anger in his tone startling her. "I am tired of this game with you. You _know _that I cannot help you if you don't talk to me, so _talk_!"

She stared at him, shocked, but couldn't bring herself to speak. He was angry with her.

"Go then," he said, pointing to the door. "If you do not want my help then I do not want yours. _Go_!"

"W-wait," she said, hating the way her voice cracked. She hated herself even more when she felt tears welling in her eyes. She tried to blink them back as he glared down at her. Slowly his face began to soften. She started to get up, knowing she wouldn't be able to stop the tears, but he pushed her back down in the chair.

"Talk, Winifred," he said. She could tell he was trying to soften his tone.

"It's stupid," she said, shaking her head and looking away from him. "You won't understand, you'll think it's stupid."

He cupped her face with one hand, gently turning her face so she was forced to meet his gaze.

"Try me," he said quietly.

"It's, uh..."

"Daniel?" he asked and she nodded.

"It's...How can I be happy that Ravenclaw lost when the only reason they lost is because they are down two players – Daniel and Geck – and it's _my _fault."

"Oh," he said, dropping his hand and walking around his desk. "Is that all?"

"That's enough, isn't it?" she demanded, ripping off her Slytherin tie and throwing it on the floor. "I told you you would think it was stupid."

"I never think you are stupid, Winifred," he said as he sat down. "Well, rarely."

She glared at him across the desk, wiping her face on the back of her hand.

"It is not your fault, Winifred," he said quietly. "Mr Gecker attacked you, got himself suspended from the team. And Daniel's...disappearance is _not _your fault."

Freddie didn't say anything but sniffled and wiped her eyes again. He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket.

"Besides," he said, leaning across the desk to hand it to her. "Slytherin has won the Quidditch cup for the last six years. Ravenclaw did not stand a chance regardless of the absence of two players."

Freddie wiped her eyes and let out a hollow chuckle.

"I'm sorry," she said finally.

"For what?"

"For being difficult," she replied. "And for...crying."

"You do not need to apologize for that," he said dismissively. "Not the latter anyway."

"I'm sorry," she said again. "It's just...whenever I start having these thoughts or – or feelings about things...I worry you'll think less of me, think I'm stupid or...I know I'm crazy. I'm ridiculous, I'm stupid."

"You are not stupid, Winifred," he said with a sigh. "And I could never think less of you."

"I just – I have all these feelings all the time and you..." she gestured at him. "You're Mr Perfect emotionless warrior."

He raised an eyebrow at her.

"It may surprise you to know that I too have feelings, Winifred."

"Yeah. Angry ones."

He winced, briefly, then quickly cleared his expression. He cleared his throat slightly.

"You have my apologies for that," he said humbly. "No one is infallible."

She looked up at him, surprised at him apologizing to her. He looked away, not meeting her gaze.

"You were frustrated," she said with a shrug. "I know I can be frustrating. I'm sorry."

"You would not be so frustrating if you would just...just trust me, Winifred," he said softly.

"I do..."

"Good," he said, standing up from his desk and clearing his throat. "Now, can we get to work on our antidote?"

"Yes sir," she said, smiling faintly. She got up from her chair and followed him to the lab.

They were on their fifth attempt at the antidote later that evening when there was a knock at Snape's office door. They exchanged brief glances.

"Stay here," he said to her. "Don't touch anything."

She made a face but sat on the stool at the workstation. He put a stasis spell on their work, then went to answer the door. Freddie listened intently, trying to see who was at the door without getting up.

"Thank you, Maxwell," she heard him say. "And congratulations on your victory."

"Thank you, sir. We're celebrating in the Common Room if you'd like to join us."

"Not tonight, Maxwell. I am working on something. Go, enjoy your night."

"Thank you sir."

Freddie heard the door close and she hopped up from the stool. She peeked out the door to see him putting a large silver trophy on his desk.

"The Quidditch Cup," Freddie observed.

"Didn't I tell you to stay put?" he said. "Back to work."

"Yes sir," she said, smirking slightly as he came back into the lab.

#

It was well after midnight when Freddie returned to the Common Room. She was a little disappointed they hadn't managed to produce an antidote yet. 'These things take time' Snape had said after their 7th antidote had failed to produce results. They'd had tea before he'd sent her to bed, which had helped eased the sting of failure even more.

There was confetti all over the floor as Freddie stepped into the Common Room. The whole place reeked of alcohol and there were a few students passed out around the room. Maxwell was passed out in front of the fireplace with a silver crown on his head, an empty bottle of Firewhiskey in his hand.

Freddie shook her head as she tip-toed through the carnage to her dormitory. Her roommates were all snoring, no doubt having taken part in the night's festivities before retiring. Freddie yawned as she pulled back the curtains around her bed – then yelped when she found someone lying in her bed. She whipped out her wand as the figure sat up.

"Whoa! It's just me, Freddie," said a sleepy voice.

"Amelia!" she said, lowering her wand. "Bloody hell. What are you doing, trying to get yourself killed?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't. Have you been drinking, Avery? Fall asleep in the wrong bed?"

"Uh, no. No ma'am, I don't drink. I mean, O'Neil tried to get me to but I didn't-"

"Amelia," she sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed. "I'm tired. What do you want?"

"I needed to talk to you."

"I'm all ears."

Amelia looked towards the other beds.

"They're asleep," Freddie assured her. "What's up?"

"Well, I-I, uh, I thought you'd want to know that, uh, they've been talking about you."

"That's nothing new, Amelia, they've been doing that for the last six months now," she said with a sigh, pulling Hemlock from her pocket.

"No, this is different, Freddie. They...they're talking about you and Professor Snape," she whispered.

Freddie quirked an eyebrow at her and waited for her to continue.

"Well he sat with you at the match then you left together and _Maxwell _said that someone else said that they saw Snape kiss you under the bleachers."

Freddie looked at her, surprised, then started laughing.

"That's – _ridiculous_," she said, trying to fight back the laughter so she wouldn't wake her classmates. "Who said that?"

"An 'unnamed source' is what Maxwell said," Amelia said with a quick, nervous smile. "There's, uh, something else."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, uh, Maxwell said that when he took the trophy to Professor Snape's office there was a secret door open and your, uh, necktie was on the floor. And he said Snape looked flushed."

"Amelia," she said, shaking her head, still smiling. "You don't believe that do you?"

"N-no?" she said, but it was more like a question. "I mean, if you tell me it isn't true I'll believe you but if it _is _true, I mean, that doesn't bother me. I still stand by you. We're friends. It's kinda cool actually-"

"It's just gossip, Amelia," she said, shaking her head. "Don't believe everything you hear. Professor Snape and I were working on our potion. There was no kissing, no-"

"Hankypanky?"

"No. Definitely not," she said.

_I wish, _she thought, shaking her head.

"Go to bed, kid, and don't believe everything you hear."

"Yes ma'am, of course not," Amelia said, climbing out of her bed. "I just thought you'd wanna hear it from me, rather than...one of them."

"I appreciate that, Amelia. Let them talk," she said with a shrug. "It doesn't bother me."

"Okay. Goodnight, Freddie."

"Night, kid."

As Amelia left, Freddie rolled her wand between her thumb and forefinger thoughtfully. She aimed her wand discreetly. _Legilimens, _she thought, entering Amelia's mind discreetly.

It wasn't the first time she'd done it. She'd practiced on Amelia when she was learning the skill, sometimes with the girl's consent, sometimes without. She refiled through her mind, finding some of what she expected – Amelia's respect and growing fondness for her, bordering on what she might call a crush. Then there it was – the doubt about Freddie's relationship with Snape. Amelia wanted to believe her but she had doubts.

Freddie withdrew from her mind, shaking her head again. She didn't care about the gossip or even about her friend's doubts. Like Snape had said earlier – let them talk.


	58. Chapter 58

#

The end of term came more quickly than Freddie would have liked. She and Snape still had not managed to create an antidote to the Invisibility Potion. She stilled planned to work on it over the summer, but she dreaded going home. She hadn't spoken to her aunt or uncle since before Christmas. She didn't know if they'd be pleased to see her or even show up to pick her up from the train station.

Freddie sat through the end-of-term feast and Dumbledore's speech, picking at her food. She felt depressed an anxious. Not just about returning home, but about Daniel. She never thought he'd be gone this long. It had been 7 months and no word, no trace, not a single clue as to what happened to him.

"What's wrong, Freddie?" Amelia asked brightly. "You're not eating your pudding."

"I'm fine," she lied. "Just not hungry."

"You excited about summer break? No homework, no lessons, _and _you're 17, so you can do magic outside of school."

"Yeah, that'll be cool," she agreed.

"Will you write to me over the summer?"

"I already told you I would."

"Maybe we can hang out, meet in Diagon Alley to get our books for next term?"

"Sounds good," she agreed. "My aunt and uncle will be thrilled I have a pureblood friend."

She glanced subconsciously at the Ravenclaw table, then back down at the food on her plate.

"I think I'm going to turn in early," she said to Amelia. "I'll see you in the morning?"

"Okay," she agreed. "Sleep well."

Freddie was in the Entrance Hall, almost to the dungeons, when Snape caught up with her.

"Come have a drink with me?" he murmured as he brushed past her and headed down the stairs.

"Sure," she said, surprised but all too happy to follow him into the dungeons.

He didn't speak again until they got to his office. Freddie sat down as he pulled a bottle of scotch from his desk and conjured two glasses.

"I need this after having to sit through another one of Albus' speeches," he said as he poured them both a glass.

"I wasn't paying much attention," she admitted, accepting the glass he handed to her.

"You did not miss much," he said, then took a long drink. "Year after year, these things never get any less tedious."

"So," she said, leaning back in her chair with her drink. "Are you going to miss me?"

"I will be relieved to have a break from your persistent annoyance," he drawled. Freddie let out a bark of laughter and sipped her drink.

"Still worried I'm going to figure out the Invisibility Antidote before you?" she teased.

"I am not worried. I have access to a vast number of ingredients and supplies that you do not," he said smugly.

"Well I suppose that's true," she said. She took a long drink of scotch. She'd gotten used to the taste over the last few months. She was going to miss this more than anything, this time alone with Snape. Drinking, talking, teasing each other.

_It's only three months, _she thought, taking another drink. _It's not that long. _

She looked up at Snape. He was watching her with that dark, unreadable gaze as he finished off his drink.

_Too long_, she thought wistfully as he poured himself another drink.

"Do you want to brew a potion?" she asked him. "One last brew before I'm gone for 3 months?"

"Very well," he agreed. "Nothing too complicated – my mind may be a little..."

"Clouded?" she suggested with a smile.

"Less sharp than usual," he said, taking his cup into the Brewing Lab.

Freddie topped off her drink before following him.

"Don't worry," she said. "I'll make sure you don't blow yourself up."

"My life, in your hands?" he drawled. "I am far from reassured."

"Guess you'll just have to trust me," she said with a smile. "What do you want to brew?"

Snape shrugged and sat on the stool with his glass of scotch in hand.

"This was your idea, Miss Gray."

"Very well," she said. "I'll find one."

Freddie went back out into Snape's office and pulled a book off the shelf. She carried it back into the lab and hopped up onto the workstation near where Snape was sitting. She flipped through the book, periodically taking sips of her drink.

"How about Potion No 86," she said finally. She looked up from the book to find Snape's eyes were on her pale legs that dangled off the table.

"A poison," he said, his eyes moving up her body and coming to rest on her face. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Cuz I'm a Slytherin," she said, sliding off the table. "It'll only take two hours to brew and should be simple enough."

Snape set his glass aside and followed her into the storage closet to gather ingredients. She found his presence in the small space to be overwhelming – his scent, the way he accidentally brushed against her as they pulled ingredients off the shelves, made her feel flushed.

She stumbled slightly when he brushed past her again on their way out of the closet. They carried the ingredients to the workstation. Freddie shed her outer robes, feeling hot and flustered.

She saw Snape smirking at her and she flushed again.

"Let's get started," she said, turning to the workstation and picking up the powdered moonstone to measure it.

#

They worked together for a while and Snape kept on drinking. Eventually he brought the bottle of scotch into the lab and ended up just sitting there, drinking and watching her work.

"You could help you know," Freddie said dryly, though she certainly didn't mind his eyes moving over her body as she worked.

"But you're doing so well on your own," he responded, smirking slightly.

"You know," she said as she added the syrup of hellebore to her potion. "You _can _admit you'll miss me. It won't kill you."

"It might," he said and she smiled. He reminded her of herself, on the train with Daniel. When he'd told her it wouldn't kill her to be nice to the snack witch.

"Well, I'll miss you," she said candidly, stirring the potion. "I'm not scared to admit it."

He scoffed at her and she looked back at her potion. _I should lay off the scotch, _she thought, then watched as he took another drink. _Though her certainly isn't._

"It's only 3 months," he said, swirling his drink before taking another sip. "I- you will be fine."

"Yeah, I know," she said. "But I'll miss brewing potions everyday, helping you with classes."

"You should enjoy your summer. It is your last summer as a student. Next summer you will be all grown up. You have to get a job, pay bills," he said. "So enjoy your summer. Spend time with yours friends – friend."

"Amelia?" she asked and he nodded. "Maybe. She has a crush on me."

His eyes lit up.

"_Really_?" he said interestedly.

"Wh- I'm trying to discourage it. Don't laugh."

"I am not laughing," he said, but he was smiling.

_If he were Daniel I'd tell him to get his mind out of the gutter...but I can't read Severus so easy. He looks amused at least. _

Freddie finished stirring the potion then walked over to the table. She leaned past him to get her glass, brushing against him deliberately as she did. She took a drink, meeting his gaze.

"I have something for you," he said, standing up, forcing her to step back.

"Oh yeah?" she asked, looking up at him.

"Wait here," he said and walked out into his office, stumbling slightly as he crossed the threshold.

_He's drunk, _she thought, smiling to herself as she took his vacated spot on the stool. _I might be too, just a little. _

Snape came back into the lab with something in his hand. He approached the stool and stopped just inches from her. He held out his hand, revealing five small vials of a familiar-looking liquid.

"My Invisibility Potion!" she said, surprised. "Why?"

"I thought you might like to take some with you, just in case you find yourself in one of those sticky situations you seem so adept at finding yourself in over the summer."

"Thank you," she said, still surprised. She slid them into her pocket.

"Use them wisely," he said softly, looking down at her.

He didn't move, didn't speak for several minutes, just gazed down at her. Freddie didn't move either but met his unwavering gaze. She wondered what he was thinking. There was a look in his eyes she'd never seen before, something she couldn't identify. Whatever it was, it was intense.

"I _will _miss you," he said softly, reaching out to touch her face. He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, then cupped her face. Freddie felt frozen to the spot, she couldn't speak or move as he brushed her cheek with his thumb...then he leaned down, and kissed her.

It was rough and possessive and it shocked her. She could taste the scotch on his tongue as it probed the corners of her mouth. Then the shock wore off and she started kissing him back.

She grasped the front of his robes, pulling him closer. He tolerated this a moment, then pulled away abruptly. She didn't get a chance to see the look on his face as he quickly turned away. He strode away, out of the room. Freddie sat on the stool, shocked. She jumped slightly when she heard the door to his quarters slam shut.

_Holy crap. Holy freaking crap. He just kissed me! Did that really just happen?_

She pinched her arm. Definitely not dreaming.

_I was right. He _likes _me, he's attracted to me. But he left. He walked away without saying anything...He must be feeling guilty. Worried someone will find out. He could lose his job...but holy crap! He kissed me!_

She touched her lips, unable to help but smile. The cauldron behind her let out a belch of black smoke, startling her. She'd gotten distracted. Their potion was ruined.

She got up from the stool, feeling a little light-headed. Either from the scotch or the kiss or both. She pulled out her wand and vanished the ruined potion, then stepped out into Snape's office. The door to his quarters was shut. She put her hand on the bookcase that hid his bedroom, but she didn't knock. She wanted to tell him it was okay, that it would be okay. She wanted him to kiss her again.

But she didn't knock. _He doesn't want to talk to me right now I'm guessing, _she thought silently. _I might make things worse. He might yell at me._

She held her hand against the door a moment longer, silently bidding him goodnight. Then she dropped her hand, turned, and left his office.


	59. Chapter 59

The next morning Freddie looked for Snape at breakfast but he wasn't there. As she headed down to the train station with her classmates, she looked for him. He wasn't there. She couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. She hadn't really expected him to come say goodbye, not after last night, but it still stung a bit.

_I guess a kiss is the best goodbye I could ever hope for, _she thought, touching her lips as she boarded the train.

Freddie ended up alone in a compartment with Amelia for the duration of the train ride. Amelia talked almost non-stop from the moment the train pulled out of the station. She read articles aloud from _Witch Weekly _then talked about the articles.

Freddie looked out the window as the train rolled along the green landscape, thinking about Daniel. She thought of the numerous train rides they had taken to and from Hogwarts. Conversation with him had been easy. They told each other everything. If he were with her now, they'd be talking about Snape, about the kiss. She wondered what Daniel would say about the situation. They'd joked about it so many times, but she'd never thought it would actually happen.

The door to the compartment opened, interrupted Freddie's thoughts.

"Anything off the trolley, dears?" the witch asked. Freddie shook her head. Amelia got an armload of candy.

"Wait," Freddie said, standing up. "Have you got anything to drink? Juice maybe?"

"Of course, dear. I have apple, grape, pumpkin..."

"Apple," Freddie decided.

She paid for her drink then sat back down as the witch left. Freddie sipped her juice. Amelia opened a box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans and went back to her magazine.

"Have you ever had sex?" Amelia asked her out of the blue. Freddie choked on her juice and cleared her throat.

"That's a very personal question, Amelia," she said, her face warm.

"I'll take that as a 'no'," she chuckled.

"Take it however you want," she muttered, wiping the juice from her chin. But it was true, of course. She'd fooled around with the boy from Borgin and Burke's but they'd never done anything serious.

"What about kiss – have you ever kissed a boy?" Amelia asked.

"A few. Why?"

"I haven't," she admitted. "O'Neil asked me out, but I said no."

"Why?"

"I guess he likes me or whatever."

"No, I mean, why did you say no?"

"I dunno. I'm not sure I like him. I mean I like him, we're like, friends of whatever, but I don't know if I _like _him like, ya know?"

"I'm not sure I'm the person to ask about this," she said, shaking her head. "I've got no love life, no boyfriend. I don't know anything about healthy relationships."

"Come on Freddie, you're like my only friend that's a girl," she pleaded.

Freddie blew out a sigh and slouched back in her seat.

"Well, you're a kid. You're supposed to date. If you think you _might _like him, then go for it."

"So you think I should go out with him?"

"I dunno. Maybe hang out with him, just the two of you. See if any sparks fly. It could be fun," she said with a shrug. "If not, well, you can still be friends."

"I guess I could make plans with him over the summer. Maybe I could meet him in Diagon Alley."

"He's a smart kid. Slytherin. Pureblood. You could do worse."

"Yeah... that Ravenclaw boy, the one you were friends with, did you two ever-"

Freddie gave her a withering glare across the compartment, a look that could curdle milk.

"We're getting off the subject, Miss Avery," she said icily.

"Sorry," Amelia said in a barely-audible voice.

They were both silent a minute, then Amelia stood.

"I'm gonna see if I can find Brian," she said and Freddie nodded to her. "I'll see you later."

"Later," Freddie mumbled, staring out the window.

She stared silently out the window for a long time. Eventually she pulled out Daniel's record player from her trunk. She hesitated then put on the Eagles record. She knew it might make her cry but she put it on anyway. She stretched out on the seat and sang along as _Take It Easy _began to play.

#

When Freddie stepped off the train she looked around the platform. It was crowded with people, with families, parents hugging their kids. She had a moment of panic, then she spotted her Aunt Millicent standing against the wall, waiting for her.

"Hey Aunt Millicent," she said, dragging her trunk over.

"Winifred, it is good to see you," she said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Is Uncle Cecil-"

"Working," Millicent answered.

"Is he...mad at me?"

"No, of course not," she said, then whispered. "He knows you had to sell your cover."

Freddie winced slightly. _They still think I killed Daniel, _she realized. _Of course they do..._

"Are you ready to go?" Millicent asked her. "You learned to Apparate this year, yes?"

"Yes," she said with a nod. She'd taken the classes and though she still didn't care for the feeling, she could successfully Apparate without splinching herself.

"Good. Let's go. I'll send the house-elf for your trunk."

Freddie dropped her trunk, focused her mind on Gray Manor, and Disapparated.

She appeared in the sitting room at Gray Manor. Millicent appeared a split second later.

"Anubis!" she called loudly. The house elf appeared with a crack.

"Yes Madam? Oh. Mistress Gray. Welcome h-"

"Go and retrieve Winifred's things from Platform 9 3/4s," Millicent interrupted. "When you return I expect a pot roast for dinner when Cecil gets home from work."

"Yes Madam," Anubis said with a low bow, then disappeared.

"I'll be in the parlor. Welcome home, Winifred."

"Thanks," Freddie said quietly as her aunt left the room.

She looked around the sitting room. It looked exactly as she remembered – then her eyes fell on something on the mantle above the fireplace. It was the statue she'd made in art class, the one that looked like Heather being eaten alive by spiders. She'd forgotten all about it. She'd sent it to them as a Christmas gift, the same day Daniel had disappeared.

She picked it up, feeling disgusted with herself.

_I was so angry when I made this, all because of that stupid prank, _she thought. _If I hadn't sent this, if I hadn't gone up to the Owlery that day..._

The clay figure exploded in her hands, startling her. She whipped out her wand and quickly cleaned up the mess she'd made.

_Can't control my magic, _she thought, annoyed. _I thought I'd gotten better with that. ...but good riddance. _

She stowed her wand and headed to her bedroom, repeating the steps of the Calming Draught in her head as she climbed up the stairs.


	60. Chapter 60

#

Freddie spent the next couple of weeks doing her best to avoid her aunt and uncle, talking to them as little as possible. She spent most of her time in her room, reading, or holed up in a corner of the kitchen working on an antidote for the Invisibility Potion. She went to Diagon Alley at least twice a week for potions ingredients, sometimes venturing into Knockturn Alley for rarer ingredients...and hoping she would run into Snape somewhere. She didn't.

One afternoon she had just returned from Diagon Alley with a bag of ingredients from the Apothecary. She was headed for the kitchen when her uncle called out to her from the parlor. Cursing inwardly she turned and walked into the parlor. Cecil and Millicent stood in the parlor, dressed to the nines.

"Yes uncle?" Freddie asked. They were clearly waiting on her.

"Put that stuff away. We're going out."

"It's not 'stuff' it's boomslang skin and demiguise fur," she said, slightly annoyed.

"Whatever. Put it away. We're going out."

"Out where? Why do I have to go?"

"We are going to Azkaban to visit your parents. Now that you are of age, you will be allowed inside the prison. I've already made the arrangements."

Freddie's blood ran cold.

"Wh- I don't want to go," she said.

"Nonsense," he said airily. "They're your parents. You can tell them all about how you killed that Mudblood boy this year. They'll be proud."

"I _don't _want to go to Azkaban."

"It will do you good. You're going. End of story."

Freddie hesitated, weighing her options. She didn't have time to figure out what to do – her uncle strode across the room and grabbed her arm, hard.

"We're going," he said forcefully and Freddie felt herself being compressed as she was forced to Apparate.

When her feet hit the ground again Freddie found herself on a rocky island, surrounded by a raging, unforgiving sea. The island was dominated by a large, towering fortress.

Freddie felt cold, even though it was the dead of summer. Cecil released her arm and she pulled her cloak tighter around herself, the cloak Snape had given her. Millicent Apparated beside them a split second later.

"Let's go," Cecil said shortly.

Not knowing what else to do, Freddie followed them towards the entrance.

She could hear screaming long before they reached the doors, overlapping voices she couldn't make out. As they got closer several dark, hooded figures appeared. As they floated towards her, Freddie felt even colder, until she felt like she was frozen to the spot. She pulled out her wand, but she couldn't move. She felt panic, despair. She knew what these were, dementors, she'd read about them but she'd never expected it would feel so...horrible.

She gasped as the screams grew louder. Her uncle said something but she couldn't hear him over the screams. Then she heard Daniel and she realized the voices were inside her head as well as out.

_'Run!' _said Daniel's voice in her head, sounding frantic. _'Freddie, run! It's going to kill you, run!'_

It took everything she had in her just to move her feet, just to turn around and run. She ran, feeling nothing but terror and misery. She could hardly think straight. When she reached the edge of the cliff she thought about throwing herself over into the raging sea.

_No. No that's not right. Severus. I need to get to Severus. _

She closed her eyes and Disapparated.

#

She appeared outside the gates to Hogwarts and collapsed into the grass. The sun was shining but she still felt cold, all the way down to her bones. She struggled to get to her feet, stumbled to the gate only to find it locked. Her legs gave out and she slumped before the gates.

_ Severus, I need to get to Severus. How? I haven't got an owl or anything. _

She pulled out her wand and tried to Summon a broom, but she was too weak.

_Crap. What's wrong with me, why can't I-_

"Miss Gray, are you alright?"

Freddie raised her head to see Dumbledore walking up the path from Hogsmeade.

She shook her head 'no' and he hurried over to her. He knelt beside her and put a hand on her forehead.

"Are you ill? You feel cold."

"N-no. Dementors," she managed to say.

Dumbledore stood quickly and pulled out his wand.

"_Expecto Patronum_," he said and a silvery substance erupted from the tip of his wand and took the form of a phoenix.

Freddie felt slightly better at the appearance of the bird. She stopped shivering.

"Bring Severus to the gate, please," the Headmaster said to the silvery phoenix. The bird bowed its head gracefully then flew off towards the castle, leaving Freddie with a hollow feeling inside. She could still hear Daniel's voice, screaming in her head.

_Was that a memory or just an affect of the dementors?_

"Here. Eat this," Dumbledore said, pulling a chocolate bar from his pocket and handing it to her.

"Chocolate?"

"Eat it. It will help."

Freddie held the chocolate bar in her hands then began to unwrap it slowly. She stopped when she saw Snape's dark figure coming across the grounds. When he got close enough to recognize her, he began to walk faster. Dumbledore waved his wand, opening the gates as he approached.

"Winifred! What happened?" he demanded, kneeling beside her. "Were you attacked?"

"Dementors," she said hollowly.

"Dementors? I don't understand," Snape said, looking up at Dumbledore.

"C-cecil and Millicent. Took me to Azkaban to visit my... I didn't want to," she said, showing him the bruise on her arm where Cecil had grabbed her. Snape's eyes darkened and he stood up, then helped Freddie to her feet, brushing the dirt from her back.

"I can't go back there," she said, shaking her head. "I can't stay with them. I can't go back to Azkaban, I can't, the screaming."

She began to shiver again.

"Eat that," Snape and Dumbledore said simultaneously.

Freddie finished unwrapped the chocolate with trembling hands as Snape and Dumbledore exchanged a look. She took a bite and almost immediately she began to feel better. The coldness went away and the misery she felt began to lessen.

"Albus, she cannot go back there," Snape said quietly to Dumbledore.

"If I was finished with school I could get a job, get an apartment but I- I don't know what to do."

"Eat your chocolate," Snape said firmly, then looked to Dumbledore. "Can she stay at the castle until term resumes?"

"I'm afraid not, Severus. There are rules about that, as I'm sure you remember," he said. Snape's face hardened.

"You can't expect her to go back there," he hissed.

"They way I see it, Miss Gray has two options."

"Oh?" Snape said, arching his eyebrow.

"Either she can return home to her aunt and uncle," Dumbledore said calmly. "Or...she can stay the rest of the summer with you."

"What?" Snape snapped.

"Miss Gray needs a place to stay. You are here most of the time anyway. I do not see the problem," Dumbledore said innocently, his blue eyes twinkling.

"I do," Snape retorted. "She's a student, she..."

'The two of you have gotten along well in the last year. Nothing has occurred to change that, I trust?"

Snape glanced at Freddie who was finishing off the chocolate, feeling intrigued.

"No, but..." Snape let out a frustrated sigh. "Fine. Fine, I guess."

"Does that suit you, Miss Gray?" Dumbledore asked her.

_Suits me just fine, _she thought.

"I guess," she said. "Yes sir."

"Good," Dumbledore said brightly. "That settles it."

"Wait," Snape said. "I need time to...clean up."

Freddie quirked her eyebrow at him but Dumbledore nodded.

"She can remain here while you arrange things," the headmaster said.

Snape nodded curtly then vanished on the spot, leaving Freddie alone with Dumbledore.

"Now," Dumbledore said. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. I'll be in my office if you need anything," he said, then headed up the path towards the castle.

Freddie watched him go, still reeling from everything that had happened. The cold had worn off with the chocolate, but she couldn't quite shake the terrified feeling, the sound of Daniel's voice telling her to run.

She'd thought about telling Dumbledore but she wasn't sure. She wasn't sure if it was real, if it was a memory, or a by-product of her imagination coupled with the dementors.

_I'll ask Severus, _she decided. _When we're alone. He's told me to trust him and I do. I'll ask him when we're alone. _

She smiled slightly. Alone with Snape. She was going to stay with him. He hadn't seemed too thrilled with the idea, but she certainly was. She was finally going to get to see where he lived, what kind of house he lived in.

She walked the Hogwarts ground aimlessly, or so she thought. It wasn't long before she found herself on the edge of the Forbidden Forest. The spot where she'd last seen Daniel. She stood at the edge of the forest, peering into the trees.

_'Run! Freddie, run! It's going to kill you, run!'_

A chill went through her and she stepped back from the trees.

"It," she whispered. "What is 'it'? Or was 'it'. Was there something out here? Were we attacked? What was it...and is it still here?"

She reached for her wand, suddenly feeling not safe.

_I shouldn't be here, _she thought, backing farther away. _I promised Severus I would stay out of the forest. _

She turned and walked away from the forest. She headed for the lake. She kept her hand on her wand, glancing over her shoulder periodically, unable to shake the feeling that someone – or something – was watching her.

She tried to shake the feeling as she approached the lake.

_A side effect of the dementors, _she told herself. _It has to be. We've gone over the forest with a fine tooth comb. There's nothing there. Dumbledore would know. Dumbledore knows everything. _

She smiled slightly, thinking back to her kiss with Snape.

_ Well, maybe he doesn't know _everything. _If he did, he certainly wouldn't have suggested me staying with Severus for the rest of the summer. _

Freddie sat down at the edge of the lake. She blew out a sigh and ran a hand through her hair. Her things were still at Gray Manor, all of her stuff.

_How am I going to get my things? _She wondered. _I can't go back there. I can't imagine they'd be happy to see me. But my clothes, my books...Maybe Severus will go back with me. _

She smiled slightly as she imagined taking Snape back to Gray Manor with her, imagined him cursing her uncle to bits if he tried to hurt her again.

**Author's Note: I expected more reviews after chapter 58! So here's 2 more i hope yall think are worth reviewing. As Snape would say - Do not disappoint me! lol**


	61. Chapter 61

#

Freddie was sitting at the edge of the lake when Snape returned. She had taken her boots off and had her feet in the water when she heard him coming across the grounds. She pulled her feet from the water, put her socks on, and was lacing her boots when he reached her.

"Come on," he said impatiently.

"I'm coming," she said, jumping up. He started towards the gate without looking at her.

"Hey," she said, hurrying after him. "I need to talk to you."

He didn't acknowledge her. When they stepped outside the gates, he held out his arm.

"Come," he said shortly, still not looking down at her. She took his arm and they immediately Disapparated.

The appeared in a small, dark sitting room. The walls were completely covered in books, apart from a small fireplace, which wasn't lit at the moment. The only light came from a candle-filled lamp on the ceiling which cast a pool of dim light on a threadbare sofa, an armchair, and a table with books piled on it.

Everything had a fine layer of dust over it and a generally un-lived in feel.

"Kitchen is through there," Snape said in a bored voice, pointing his wand at one of the bookcases, revealing an open doorway. He pointed at another bookcase, revealing a staircase. "Your room is upstairs on the right, bathroom across the hall. Stay out of my room. I need to return to Hogwarts."

"Wait!" Freddie said. "We need to talk."

"No," he said coolly. "We do not. What happened at the end of last semester was a mistake. IT will not happen again."

"Wh- no! Not about that. I mean, I figured, but," she shook her head before continuing. "When...when I saw the dementors today, I heard something. I don't know if it was a memory, or..."

She sank down onto the couch and sighed. Snape watched her a moment, then sat down in the armchair.

"What did you hear?" he asked, leaning forward, looking at her. She met his dark eyes and swallowed heavily.

"Daniel's voice," she said softly. "Telling me to run. That something was coming to kill me and to run."

He stared at her for a long time, his black eyes glittering, calculating.

"I don't remember anything else, no actual memories. I didn't _see _anything," she said. "Just heard his voice, in my head, telling me to run."

"That something was coming to kill you," he said.

"Yes."

"You have no idea what?"

"No," she said. "...Could it have just been the dementors? My imagination?"

"It is possible," he said slowly. "I will talk to Dumbledore."

"Wait," she said again as he stood to leave. "My things, all of my stuff, it's still at Gray Manor. If I go back to get it...I'm not sure what my uncle will do."

He looked thoughtful a moment.

"Your uncle has a house-elf, yes?"

"Yes," Freddie said with a nod.

"If you call him, will he come?"

"Possibly, if he hasn't been ordered not to," she said. "Anubis?"

There was a moment of silence then the house-elf appeared with a crack.

"Mistress Gray!" he squeaked loudly. "Your uncle – hims is very mad you is disappeared."

"Anubis can you get my things? Bring them here and _not _tell my uncle where I am? Or my aunt?" she asked urgently.

"Yes, Mistress."

"Promise me, Anubis? Please?"

"I promise," Anubis said then disappeared.

"Now, that is taken care of," Snape said. "I must return to the castle. Are you...okay?"

"Yeah. Yes, I think so...Thank you," she said, looking up at him. "Thank you for letting me stay with you."

"I did not have a choice," he said tightly, then Disapparated with a pop.

Freddie remained sitting on the couch for a few minutes, looking around the room. When her things appeared, she stood up. No Anubis, just her Hogwarts trunk. She assumed it was all he was able to send undetected.

Freddie picked up her trunk and dragged it up the staircase.

_He sure has a thing for hidden rooms, _she thought as she climbed the staircase. She paused when she noticed there were pictures hanging on the wall along the stairs. She set her trunk down and pulled out her wand.

"_Lumos_," she said, lighting the tip of her wand so she could see the pictures. They were coated in a thick layer of dust. She used her thumb to wipe some of the dust away from one of the frames, revealing a sallow-faced little boy with a crop of black hair.

"Baby Snape," she whispered, grinning.

She cleared off another frame, finding photos of a thin-faced woman who could only be Snape's mother. The third picture was another of Snape, probably five years old, sitting on his mother's lap. He didn't look happy, even as a child.

There were discolored spots on the wall where photos were missing. Freddie stowed her wand and finished lugging her trunk up the stairs.

She opened the first door to the right and entered another dusty room. It was simple, spartan even. A twin-sized bed with white sheets, a single pillow, and a black quilt folded at the end. A wooden bedside table with a lamp on it.

_A Muggle lamp, _she thought, dropping her trunk and walking over to it. Curious, she flipped a switch and the room was flooded with a yellowish light. _Oh wow...electricity. _

Everything she knew about Muggles she'd learned from Muggle Studies class and from Daniel. He'd helped her with an assignment their third year, an essay on electricity – the somewhat mysterious element that powered Muggle homes, shops, towns. Daniel had tried his best to explain it to her – electrons, conductors, insulators. It had been confusing to her but fascinating.

Freddie turned the lamp on and off several times, amazed.

"Ingenious," she said aloud.

She walked over to the window and opened the black curtains. Freddie coughed slightly at the cloud of dust it produced. She opened the window, letting some fresh air and light into the musty room.

She looked out the window at the rows and rows of dilapidated brick houses. _A Muggle village, _she realized. A tall structure loomed over the houses. It looked like some sort of chimney. There was a dirty river winding its way past the buildings.

The village was quiet, almost eerily so. There were no people out, no children or animals. Everything was still apart from the river. She couldn't help but wonder if anyone else even lived here.

Freddie turned back to look at her room. There was a rickety wooden dresser against one wall. She opened each drawer, hoping to find more relics of Snape's life, but they were all empty.

The walls were bare, a faded pinstripe wallpaper. There were discolored spots on the walls, too big to have been photos. Posters maybe.

Freddie pulled Hemlock from her pocket, grew him to full size, and set him on the foot of the bed.

"Well," she said to the stuffed kneazle. "Looks like we've got some cleaning to do. I thought that's what Severus was supposed to be doing but whatever. He's a man anyway, I suspect we have very different ideas of 'clean'. At least the sheets look clean."

She opened her trunk, curious to see what Anubis had been able to smuggle out. Daniel's record player sat on top, much to her delight.

"This'll help," she said happily. "Cleaning is always better with music."

She put the record player on the bedside table, then pulled out her records. She decided to play David Bowie, the upbeat music lifting her spirits as she started to clean. She opened the drawer on the bedside table and found it was just the right size for her vinyls.

She pulled out her wand and started cleaning the walls, removing years worth of dust and grime. She pondered the faded wallpaper for a few minutes, then an idea struck her. Using a Color-Changing Charm she changed 3 of the walls to a dark gray color. The fourth wall she changed to a charcoal black, accenting the other walls nicely.

She cleaned the curtains and the glass on the window, letting even more sunlight into the room. She cleaned the floors, finding a nice oak hardwood floor beneath the dust.

She cleaned everything in the room that she could, dancing around with her wand to the Bowie songs. When it was cleaned to her satisfaction, she paused.

"There's still a smell," she said to Hemlock. "What I wouldn't give for some candles. Hmm...what was that spell... Nova something, nova..._Nova Caeli!_"

Immediately the dank smell disappeared, leaving behind a fresh scent. She grinned triumphantly at Hemlock.

"Now, that's done," she said, walking over to her trunk. "I guess I can put my clothes in the dresser."

She dragged her trunk to the dresser and began to put her clothes away. Socks, underwear, and bras in the top drawer, along with her pajamas. Shirts in the next drawer, then pants, then dresses in the bottom drawer, alone with her cloaks, including the one Snape had given her.

She took out her books and lined them up on top of the dresser. She wished she had a bookcase but she didn't, nor did she have anything big enough to transfigure. The best she could do for the time being was to stack them on top of one another. When that was done, she picked through what was left in her trunk.

She sat cross-legged on the floor and went through her things. She made a pile for trash. A pile of unused parchment, quills, and ink – things that would go back in her trunk. Then she made a pile of letters that she'd written to Daniel over the last 7 months. There were a few dozen of them. She'd taken Snape's advice to heart, writing letters to Daniel when she wished she could talk to him. He'd been right, it did help. Still, she couldn't bring herself to get rid of them.

She folded the letters neatly and went to put them back in her trunk. As she did, she felt something under the lining of her trunk. Curious, she investigated and found where the lining of her trunk was ripped at the corner. She pulled it up and found a picture under the lining.

She smiled as she turned the picture over. It was a photo of her and Daniel. Professor Merritt had taken the picture during their third year when they'd learned to develop moving pictures. They'd been sitting at a table in the art classroom – Daniel was grinning at the camera as he put his fingers up in bunny ears behind Freddie's head. Freddie was smirking slightly and rolling her eyes at him.

"You goofball," she said softly and sighed. "I miss you."

She sat staring at the photo for a long time. Finally she got to her feet, still clutching the photo.

"I need a picture frame," she said aloud. Her eyes fell on the pile of rubbish she needed to vanish. "That'll work."

She pulled out her wand and, after a bit of trial and error with the magic, she managed to transform some broken quills into a simple black picture frame. She put the photo in it and placed it on the nightstand next to the record player.

She vanished the remaining rubbish, then put the rest of her things back in her trunk.

"Guess we'll go back downstairs," she said, picking Hemlock up off the bed. "Maybe we can clean up down there, after I get something to drink. Let's go check out the kitchen."

#

**Author's Note: Sorry its taking me a while to get stuff typed up. Having a bit of a rough day. Hopefully will have more chapters soon.**


	62. Chapter 62

#

Freddie carried Hemlock down the stairs, smiling at the pictures of young Snape on the wall as she passed. She paused in the sitting room and used her wand to freshen the air. She looked at the titles of some of the hundreds of books on the shelves. Most of them appeared to be books on Dark Magic or Potions. She wanted to investigate more, but she was thirsty.

She carried Hemlock through the other door Snape had left open. It was a small kitchen with yellow wallpaper, brown wooden cabinets, and green counter tops and appliances. Not the emerald green that was associated with Slytherin but an old avocado green. It was just as dusty as the rest of the house and had an air of disuse.

"He probably takes his meals at Hogwarts," she said as she placed Hemlock on the counter. She flipped a switch near the doorway and a light on the ceiling flickered on.

Freddie didn't see an icebox, which is what they had at Gray Manor to keep drinks and meat cold, by way of a Cooling Charm. But there was a large metal box and Freddie remembered Daniel telling her about "fridges" that Muggles used to keep things cold. It ran off electricity.

She opened the door to the fridge, hoping to find something to drink. There wasn't much in it. A gallon of milk but when she opened it the sour smell made her gag. She quickly put the cap back on and stuck it back on the shelf.

There was a half of a block of cheese that had mold on it and something mushy that might have been fruit at some point. That was all. She quickly shut the door, shaking her head.

_Does he really live like this? _She wondered. _I guess he really must not spend much time here. _

She opened the various cabinets. There was no food. There was a mismatched set of dishes – plates, bowls, cups. She took one of the glasses down, cleaning it with a quick spell, and placed it on the counter.

"_Augamenti_," she said, putting the tip of her wand to the cup. It filled with water and she drank half the cup. She poured the rest down the drain then put the glass back in the cupboard.

"Looks like we need to go shopping," she said, picking Hemlock up. "Guess it's time to check out this Muggle town."

Freddie still had her coin purse in her pocket from her morning trip to the Apothecary, but she headed upstairs to get a parchment and quill. She scribbled a quick note to Snape, telling him she was going to explore the town. She left it on the armchair downstairs, just in case he returned before she did. She shrunk Hemlock and put him in her pocket. She stowed her wand away then left out the back door in the kitchen.

She stepped out into a fenced in back yard that was overgrown with weeds. As she made her way through the overgrowth towards the gate in the fence, she stumped her toe on a brick. Upon closer inspection she found old bricks that had once lined a flowerbed.

_His mother's roses...this is where Severus grew up, _she realized.

Freddie looked back at the brick house she had just come out of.

_From what I've gathered he didn't have the happiest of childhoods...so why would he keep coming here? _She wondered.

She pushed open the gate. It offered some resistance, as if it hadn't been opened in a while, but she gave it a good shove and it opened. She stepped out and pulled the gate shut behind her.

She made her way to the street and looked up and down the road. The identical brick houses stretched as far as the eye could see.

_Guess it doesn't matter which way I go, _she thought.

She made note of Snape's house number, then started up the street in the direction of the large chimney. As she got closer to it she could see it had once been some sort of mill. It clearly hadn't been in use in many years, possibly decades.

The streets were dead quiet as she wandered around. She tried to see if there were any signs of life in any of the houses, but she couldn't see through any of the windows.

She'd been walking for 15 minutes before she reached a larger street with a few cars driving down it. She followed the road in the same direction of the cars and eventually came to small strip of shops.

_I wish Daniel were here, _she thought as she approached one of the shops. There were some sort of pumps outside of the shop. She watched as a car pulled up to one of the pumps. A Muggle man got out, walked around his car, and put a hose in it.

_Daniel would know what that is. _

She entered the store, a bell jingling on the door as she did. The old man at the counter glanced up from his newspaper, grunted a hello, then turned his attention back to the his paper. Freddie pursued the aisles curiously. She'd never been in a Muggle shop before. All of the lights were electric and bright. There was a row of glass door fridges, filled with different types of Muggle drinks. She checked the price tag of a canned drink then it hit her – she didn't have any Muggle money.

_Crap, _she thought silently. _I'm an idiot. I don't have Muggle money, I'll have to go to Gringotts to exchange it. _

Freddie headed for the door and the Muggle looked up again.

"You didn't find what you were looking for?" he asked, his voice gruff.

"No, sir, just realized I left my wallet at home," she lied smoothly. He nodded and went back to reading. Freddie went out the door, the bell tinkling again. The man and the car were gone from the pump. She went around the back of the building, out of the view of the road. She made sure no one was around, then Disapparated.

#

Freddie appeared on the street outside of Gringotts. She breathed a sigh of relief at being back among the wizarding community. Her relief didn't last long as she realized her aunt and uncle could be here.

_I don't want them to see me here, _she thought as she quickly made her way up the steps to the bank.

She went up to one of the goblin tellers and asked for an exchange for Muggle currency. She gave him half of the Galleons from her money pouch and watched, intrigued, as he counted out a number of paper bills.

"Thank you," she said when the transaction was complete. "...If I wanted to make a withdrawal from my vault, I would need my key, right?"

"Yes, Miss Gray. Without the key you cannot access your vault," he said, peering down at her, frowning.

"Thank you," she said quickly and walked away with her money.

When her parents had been sentenced to Azkaban, the money in their vault had been left to her. Her Uncle had control of the vault until she turned 17. He should have given her the key after her birthday, but he hadn't. She'd never really thought about it because he gave her money whenever she asked.

_Maybe Severus will know what to do, _she told herself as she left the bank. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she Disapparated.

She reappeared out back of the Muggle shop near the dumpster. After making sure she hadn't been spotted, she walked around the building and went back inside.

10 minutes later Freddie left the store with bags of sodas, candy, and crisps. As she walked back towards Snape's house she took one of the sodas from her bag and popped the top. She took a sip and the carbonated grape drink tickled her throat and she burped, surprised. She chuckled and took another sip.

She wandered the streets for a while, drinking her soda. Before long she realized she had no idea where she was. She had tried – and failed – to retrace her steps, but it was starting to get dark out, and her bags were heavy.

_Why am I even walking?_

She looked around the empty street. All the windows were dark, no sign of life anywhere. She held tight to her bags and Disapparated.

She appeared in the sitting room. Her note was still on the chair. Snape had not been home. She took her bags into the kitchen and put them on the counter.

"I need to do some cleaning before I put stuff up," she mused aloud. "And for cleaning...I need music."


	63. Chapter 63

#

Freddie was still cleaning the kitchen, listening to the Beatles, when she heard the pop of someone Apparating in the sitting room. She turned down the volume and peeked into the sitting room. Snape was sitting in his armchair, reading her note.

"Hi," she said brightly.

"You explored the town?" he asked.

"Yeah, sorta. Not much to see, is there? Do you even have neighbors?"

"I do not know."

"Well I got some groceries. Chips and candy in the cupboard. Sodas in the fridge – which is really neat by the way. All this electricity stuff. I like the lights – brighter than candles and torches."

"Mm. So you are settling in well?"

"Yep. Did some cleaning – I cleaned the kitchen, too, I hope you don't mind?"

"No, Miss Gray," he said, getting up from his chair. "I do not mind."

He followed her into the kitchen and looked around. He opened the fridge and took one of the sodas.

"Grape Fanta," he said, popping the top.

"Yeah – careful, it might make you burp," she warned, grinning.

"I am familiar with soda," he said, taking a sip. He looked through the cabinets, at the things she'd bought.

"You do not know much about grocery shopping, do you?" he said, smirking faintly.

"Hey, all you had was spoiled milk and moldy cheese!"

"I have not had time to shop. Ive been taking my meals at Hogwarts."

"I figured as much. What's wrong with my groceries?"

"You cannot live off crisps and candy," he said, smirking again.

"I'm pretty sure I can. Besides, I don't know how to cook," she said with a shrug.

"You know know how to cook but you are skilled at Potions?" he snorted. "Oh right...you had a house elf. You are spoiled, you have never had a reason to learn to cook."

"I'm not spoiled!" she said, feeling her face turn red.

"You are," he sneered. "Couldn't call your house elf to cook a dinner for you, princess?"

_He's trying to piss me off, _she realized. _Is this his way of dealing with what happened between us, his attraction to me? _She decided the best thing she could do was to not let it get to her.

"Anubis is not _my _house elf, he belongs to my uncle...and I cannot risk trying to contact him again. He wasn't even able to send me all of my things," she said, shaking her head. "He sent my Hogwarts trunk, that's all. I'm worried he got caught."

"He will be fine, I'm sure. Are you missing any necessities?"

"No. I have most of my books, all of my school things...enough clothes to get by. But none of my potions things. I've been working on the antidote and I just dropped a good deal of money on boomslang skin this morning," she said wistfully. "Not to mention demiguise hair and you know how hard that is to find."

"That is an unfortunate loss," he agreed.

"That reminds me...my vault, at Gringotts. My parents left me some money – well I guess technically _they _didn't leave it to me, some legal Ministry people decided it was...anyway, it's not much but my uncle never gave me the key like he was supposed to when I turned 17. I can't get my money."

"...I believe Dumbledore can take care of that," he said slowly.

"What did he say about...about what I heard?"

"He said for you not to worry about it."

"Very helpful," she said sarcastically.

Snape said nothing, but finished his soda. He threw the empty can into the trash, then pulled out his wand. He pointed it at the island in the center of the kitchen and it slid aside, revealing a descending stone staircase.

"I am surprised you did not find this on your own," he said, smirking again.

"I was a bit preoccupied cleaning," she said, peering down into the darkness. "What's down there?"

He motioned for her to go down. Curious and excited she started down the stairs, her imagination running wild. _A secret basement? Some sort of sex dungeon?_

Torches along the walls lit automatically as she descended. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, torches lit around the room casting light on a dirt-floor room with pewter cauldrons, a workstation, and a cabinet that she assumed held potion ingredients. It smelled of herbs and smoke, the only room in the house that showed signs of being used.

"Why am I not surprised?" she said, grinning at Snape who had followed her down.

"You may continue working on the antidote while you are here," he said. "I have been working on it in my lab at Hogwarts, for convenience sake."

"I take it you haven't had any luck either?" she asked.

"I am close, I think. I will share my notes with you, after we eat dinner."

"You can cook?"

"Of course I can cook, but even I cannot make a meal from crisps and chocolate," he said. "I will return shortly."

He Disapparated before she could ask where he was going.

Freddie hurried upstairs to her room and got several books she thought could be useful in her brewing. On her way back through the kitchen she grabbed Hemlock off the counter before heading back into the cellar. She placed Hemlock on the table along with her books. Then she began to look around the room.

She opened the cabinet which, as she suspected, contained numerous potion ingredients. Alot of them were illegal to possess and Freddie wondered how he could be so confident he would not get in trouble.

_Maybe that's the reason for all the secret doors, _she mused. _He only lets people see what he wants them to see. _

That thought gave her an idea. She began walking along the walls, looking for any sign of other secret doors. She scrutinized the walls and was about to give up when she noticed a slight discoloration of one of the bricks. Curious, she tapped it with her wand. The bricks began to move, shifting and rearranging to reveal a floor-to-ceiling sized cabinet. Shelves upon shelves laden with vials and bottles of potions, all in alphabetical order.

_Alot of poisons, _she realized, inspecting the labels, which were written in Snape's handwriting.

"Curiosity killed the cat, Miss Gray," said Snape's voice as he appeared behind her. She whirled around to see him placing a box on the workstation. She hadn't expected him back so quickly.

"Is that pizza?" she asked, surprised.

He grunted in response and pulled out his wand. With a flick he closed the cabinet behind her. He gave it another flick and two glasses floated downstairs, followed by a bottle of wine. She hadn't seen any wine in the cabinets. There was probably a hidden cabinet she hadn't noticed.

Freddie wandered over to the table and lifted the lid of the box. She took a slice of pepperoni pizza and sat on a wooden stool while Snape poured the wine.

"My notes," he said, producing a black journal and putting it down in front of her. "For the Invisibility Potion. Once you've read them you can get started."

He took a slice of pizza, one of the wine glasses, and headed for the stairs.

"You're not going to help?" she asked.

"I have something else to do," he replied smoothly. "I will be upstairs."

"O-_kay_," she said, watching him go and feeling confused.


	64. Chapter 64

Freddie read through Snape's notes while she ate two slices of pizza. He'd tried a lot of the same things she'd tried with the Invisibility antidote. She made some notes of her own, wishing she had the journal she'd used at home to keep notes in the kitchen. She went upstairs and got the record player from the kitchen before starting work on the antidote.

She was glad to have the freedom to listen to music again while she brewed. She had tried listening to music once while brewing in the kitchen at Gray Manor. Even though she'd kept the volume low, her uncle had heard it. He'd come into the kitchen and smashed the record player, berated her for listening to Muggle music. She'd been able to repair the record player later and hid it underneath her bed after that.

A few hours later, Freddie was bent over the cauldron, carefully adding demiguise fur when she heard footsteps on the stairs.

"Come to check up on me?" she asked, glancing up briefly before turning her attention back to her potion, stirring it carefully.

"No," he answered shortly, walking over to the supply. "You do not need looking after. I merely needed to grab something."

She stopped stirring and watched as he took asphodel roots and a jar of stewed mandrakes from the cupboard.

"What could you possibly need mandrakes for?" she asked as he turned to go.

"Mind your own potion, Miss Gray," he said as he climbed the stairs.

Curious, Freddie waited until he was gone then placed a stasis spell on her cauldron. She slipped up the stairs quietly, went through the kitchen and sitting room, then up the second flight of stairs just in time to see Snape's bedroom door shut.

She stood in the hallway and sniffed the air. She could smell fire and steam.

_He's brewing something, _she realized. _But why here, in his room, why not down in the cellar? And why wouldn't he tell me? Even if he's brewing something illicit, we've brewed poisons together before. _

She lingered in the hallway a moment, contemplating. Then she ducked into her room, grabbed another vinyl, and headed back downstairs.

Several hours passed before she saw Snape again. She was on her third attempt of the night but she had a good feeling about this one.

"It's nearly 3 a.m., what are you still doing up?" he asked, surrounding irritable as he walked down the stairs. He turned the music down.

"Hey, this isn't Hogwarts. I don't have a curfew," she said defensively.

"You should go to bed," he muttered, going over to the supply cupboard.

"What're you gonna do, deduct house points? Give me a detention?" she taunted.

He let out a grunt and put something in his pocket she couldn't see. Instead of leaving, he strode over to her cauldron.

"Progress?" he asked.

"Yeah, I think so. I botched the first two batches but so far this looks good."

"It's stable at least," he observed.

"What about what you're working on?" she prodded. "Any luck?"

He gave her a cold look then turned and walked away.

"Let me know when you have something worth testing," he called from the top of the stairs. "Do not stay up too late."

"Do not stay up too late," she muttered mockingly. She walked over to the table, turned her music back up, then went back to work.

Almost an hour later, she turned her music down again. She glanced at her cauldron, feeling confident in the completed brew. She put a stasis spell on the cauldron, then left the cellar and headed upstairs.

She checked her watch as she walked down the hall. It was nearly 4 a.m. She figured if he was asleep she would go to bed and tell him about her brew in the morning.

She stopped outside of Snape's bedroom. There was a light coming from beneath his bedroom door so she knocked.

The door opened and Snape stepped out into the dark hallway, quickly shutting the door behind him before she could peek inside.

"Miss Gray," he said, sounding tired.

"Hey. Hi. You're still awake. I, uh, I need to test my antidote," she said, clasping her hands behind her back. "Do you have mice or something?"

"Or something," he exhaled. "Go back downstairs. I will join you momentarily."

Freddie hesitated, hoping to get a glance inside his room. He pointed to the staircase.

"Go, Miss Gray," he said sternly.

Freddie made a face then headed for the stairs. She was halfway down when she heard his door open and shut.

_What are you hiding up there? _She wondered as she headed back down to the cellar.

Five minutes later Snape came down the stairs to the cellar, carrying a live rat in a cage.

"Alright, Miss Gray," he said, his voice sounding weary. "Let's test your little antidote."

"You keep that thing in your room?" she asked, grinning at him. He ignored her and placed the cage on the table.

"Is it your pet?" she asked as he opened the cage.

"No," he scoffed, pulling out a vial of Invisibility Potion. "It's a lab rat. My third this month. Fetch me a dropper, Miss Gray."

Freddie grabbed a dropped from the potion supplies and carried it over. She took the Invisibility Potion from him and uncorked it.

"Three drops should suffice," he said.

Freddie nodded and sucked up three drops of potion. Snape held up the wiggling rat and she put the dropper in its mouth. He continued to hold the rat as it turned invisible.

"Your antidote," he said and she nodded, quickly walking over to her cauldron. She got a few drops of the potion and walked back over.

"Uh, I can't see its mouth," she said.

Snape scoffed slightly and used one hand to grab the invisible rat's head.

"Here, by my index finger," he said.

Freddie placed the dropper near his finger, found the rat's mouth, and squeezed the potion inside. She waited expectantly...but nothing happened.

"Ah, well. Better luck next time, Miss Gray," Snape said, placing the invisible rat back into its cage.

"But I had such a good feeling about this one," Freddie protested. "Maybe it just needs more of the potion."

"Accept the loss, Miss Gray. 'Good feelings' mean nothing."

Freddie sank down onto the stool with a sigh. Snape put a hand on her shoulder briefly, then quickly dropped it.

"You will try again," he said simply.

"Yeah," she sighed. "Maybe I need to adjust the ratio of snakeweed."

"Not tonight," he said, picking up the rat's cage and the pizza box. "Come. Get some sleep, Miss Gray. You can start fresh tomorrow."

Freddie sighed again but nodded in agreement. She _was _tired. She followed Snape up out of the cellar, the torches extinguishing as they climbed the stairs.

He put the leftover pizza into the fridge, then Freddie followed him upstairs. He opened her bedroom door and motioned her inside.

"You decorate," he commented, looking inside as she entered the room.

"Yeah. Is that okay?" she asked, looking around.

"Mm. This room has not been occupied in many years, not since I was a teenager," he said, lingering in the doorway.

"This was your room?" she asked, surprised.

"...Goodnight, Miss Gray," he said, turning to leave.

"Goodnight Severus," she said quietly.

He paused, grimaced briefly, then shut the door.

Freddie lay down on the bed with a sigh that turned into a yawn. She held Hemlock close and rolled onto her side, kicking off her boots. Her eyes fell on the photo of Daniel she'd found earlier and she smiled sadly.

_Severus is keeping his distance, Daniel. He's all 'Miss Gray' and keeping secrets from me. All because he kissed me last month. I'd gotten used to the way he was before that. The kind words, gentle touches...I'd even gotten used to him calling me Winifred._

She chuckled out loud and yawned again.

_ I miss the way things were before he kissed me. I don't regret the kiss of course, but...I miss him. I guess I'll just have to figure out how to worm my way back into his good graces. It might take time, but I've been patient this long. _

#


	65. Chapter 65

#

Over the next week and a half Freddie continued working on the Invisibility Antidote. When she wasn't in the cellar she was in the kitchen, trying to learn to cook. She'd gotten a few cookbooks from Diagon Alley and had spent most of her remaining money on groceries. She found soups and stews easy enough to make, and not unlike potions.

Snape spent most of his time in his room or at Hogwarts. She was never sure when he was home or not, except sometimes late at night she could smell him brewing something in his room. She was sure he was avoiding her. He never ate meals with her but she did notice he ate the leftovers from the fridge.

One evening he came into the kitchen, a frustrated look on his face. Freddie stood at the stove, stirring a pot of beef and vegetable stew.

"What are you doing, Miss Gray?" he asked, a note of irritation in his voice.

"Uh, _cooking_," she said. "Clearly."

"Clearly," he repeated, sitting down at the table.

"You okay? Your super secret potion not going well?"

He grunted, a non-committal response.

"How about your antidote?" he asked, standing up again. He walked over to the cabinet and got a wine glass.

"It's, uh, stewing," she said, watching as he got a bottle of wine from the fridge. "I should have something ready to test in about an hour, after dinner. You hungry?"

"I could eat," he said, sitting down again.

She watched him pour a glass of wine and take a drink.

"Since when do you drink wine?" she asked curiously. "I thought you were a scotch man?"

He didn't answer right away. Freddie got two mismatched bowls from the cabinet and turned the stove off.

"Clouds my mind," she heard him mutter.

"Hm," she said as she spooned the stew into the bowls.

_Does that mean he stopped drinking scotch because of me? Because he kissed me?_

She got spoons from the drawer and carried the food over to the table. She put the bowls down then went and retrieved another wine glass from the cabinet. She sat down next to him and poured herself a glass of wine.

"Is it good?" she asked Snape as he took a bite of stew.

"Mm. You should learn to make something other than soup," he commented.

"Hey, I'm working on it," she said. "I'm not a house-elf, ya know?"

"You have certainly been cleaning like one."

"Well excuse me for not wanting to live like a dust bunny," she drawled, then took a bite of her stew. "Don't you ever clean? I thought that's why you came home before bringing me here?"

"No, I came to...remove things I would prefer you not see."

"Man of mystery," she said, sipping her wine. "What are you hiding, hm?"

"You will never know, Miss Gray."

"Can't we drop the formalities, _Severus_? I never thought I'd actually miss being called 'Winifred'."

"Hmm," he said, but didn't say anything else as he continued eating.

"So, why don't you clean? Dust? It's not like you have to do it by hand," she said practically. "Just a few quick spells, you'd probably be better at it than I am."

"I am better at everything than you are, M-...Winifred," he said, giving her a quick smile. "As for cleaning, I have had no reason to. I do not spend much time here, usually, and when I do I am in my room or brewing in the cellar."

"The cellar _was _the cleanest room in the house," she agreed.

"Until you got here."

"Yeah. I've been thinking of cleaning up the sitting room, is that okay? I thought it might be nice to sit by the fireplace and read sometimes."

"I do not care what you do, as long as you stay out of my room," he said nonchalantly.

"Yeah? No books on the shelves you don't want me to see?"

"If there were, they would not be there, Winifred."

"Naturally."

They finished their meal in silence and Freddie checked her watch.

"30 minutes til my potion is ready to test," she said, standing up from the table. She took Snape's empty bowl and her own to the sink. She washed them with a quick spell, dried them, and returned them to the cabinet.

Snape refilled his wine glass and sipped it as he watched her move around the kitchen. She put the leftover stew into the fridge and closed the door. Snape stood up from the table.

"I'm going to inspect your progress," he said, waving his wand to reveal the entrance to the cellar. He carried his wine with him down the stairs.

Freddie walked back over to the table. She uncorked the wine bottle and refilled her own glass before heading down into the cellar.

She found Snape sitting at the workstation, reading through her notes she'd been keeping in the journal.

"You have been keeping good notes," he remarked. "Very detailed."

"Well I am a fastidious student," she said, walking over to her cauldron to inspect her simmering brew.

"That you are, Miss Gray...Winifred."

"Thank you, Severus," she said, smiling at him.

He finished browsing her notes and closed the journal. He took a sip of his wine before placing the glass on the desk.

"I will retrieve our test subject," he said, standing up. Freddie nodded to him as he left the cellar. She walked over to the workstation where Daniel's record player sat. She flipped through the vinyls she had downstairs before finally settling on Queen.

She was listening to _We Are the Champions _when Snape came back down the steps with the rat.

"Hello Andrew," she said as Snape placed the cage down in front of her. It was the name she'd bestowed on their test subject.

"Actually 'Andrew' met with an...unfortunate end," Snape said slowly. "This is a new rat."

"Not from my potion?" she asked, looking up at him, alarmed.

"No, I would have informed you if your brew were responsible," he said. "The fault is mine."

"Ah. Well, hazards of the occupation," she said, poking her finger in the cage to stroke the rat's head. "I believe I'll call you...Bruce."

"Stop naming the rats, Winifred," Snape said. "You will get too attached."

"I don't get attached," she scoffed. "If Bruce dies – or when you kill him rather – then we'll have a Carlyle. Then a...Dylan. Maybe a Eustace."

"Alphabetical?"

"Yes, it's efficient."

"Any particular reason they're all male?"

"Well I guess Bruce could be a Beatrice. Care to check?" she joked.

"No, thank you," he said, opening the cage. "Get the Invisibility Potion."

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

Snape held Bruce while Freddie administered the potion. When the rat turned invisible, he coated it with a fine powder, something they'd learned to do during the last week, after he'd been bittern. Freddie drew up a few drops of the potion from her cauldron and walked back over.

"Here goes nothing," she said and put the dropped into the rat's mouth.

_Come on, Bruce, _she pleaded silently, holding her breath.

Slowly, beneath the white powder, the rat's gray fur became visible. Freddie gasped, then let out a whoop that startled Snape so much he dropped the rat and it scurried across the floor.

"We did it!" she declared enthusiastically. "We _actually _did it!"

She threw her arms around Snape and he stiffened.

"_You _did it, Winifred," he said, pushing her away. "This is your victory."

"I couldn't have done it without you," she said, shaking her head as she flushed with price. "We started this together. Screwed it up a bunch together – and independently – before I got it right."

"We did but I have been...distracted as of late. The win is yours. Write it up and I will send it off to _Apothecary Now _for publication."

"Yes sir."

"Wait," he said. "We are forgetting an important step. We need to test your antidote on something other than 'Bruce' – we have to be sure it is safe for human ingestion."

"Good point," she said and picked up the vial of Invisibility Potion.

"Not you," he said, taking the vial from her. "I have less to live for."

Freddie frowned slightly at his words as Snape uncorked the vial and downed the potion. He turned invisible and Freddie felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up when she realized she no longer knew where he was. She thought she felt something brush the base of her neck, then she saw the ladle being lifted from the cauldron.

"You know you don't have to test it on yourself," she said uneasily, walking over. She was suddenly not so confident in her brewing abilities.

"Testing potions on students is frowned upon," he said, then lifted the ladle to his invisible mouth.

Freddie held her breath, then let it out slowly as he became visible once more.

"But I was willing," she said softly, looking up at him.

"Noted," he said, touching her cheek briefly. He dropped his hand quickly and took a step back. "Write it up, Miss Gray."

"Yes sir," she said, somewhat disappointed as he walked towards the stairs.

"And catch my rat," he added as he left the cellar.


	66. Chapter 66

#

Freddie got a blank piece of parchment and wrote out a clear and concise recipe for the Invisibility Antidote, consulting their notes from the journal. When she finished, she folded up the parchment. She finished off her glass of wine while she watched Bruce the rat scurry around, investigation corners of the cellar. She set down her empty glass and pulled out her wand.

"_Accio_," she said, pointing it at Bruce.

The rat flew towards her and she caught him in mid-air. She quickly put the surprise rat back into his cage and shut the door of the cage.

"Thank you, Bruce," she said, looking at him through the cage. "You deserve a piece of cheese, I think."

She turned off the record player, put her recipe in her pocket. She picked up Bruce's cage in one hand and her empty wineglass in the other, then headed upstairs. She put the glass and the cage on the kitchen counter and opened the fridge.

"What are you doing, Winifred?"

Freddie straightened up and saw Snape standing in the doorway leading into the sitting room, a book in his hand.

"Giving Bruce a piece of cheese," she said innocently, shutting the fridge. "What are _you _doing?"

"I told you not to get too attached," he warned.

"I'm not," she said defensively. "I'm just giving him cheese. He was a good boy, he helped us test our potion."

"It's a rat it's what it's here for," he said. "I too tested your potion."

"You want some cheese?" she offered teasingly. He raised an eyebrow then leaned across the counter, his hand outstretched. She broke off a piece of cheese and gave it to him. He nodded his thanks and left the kitchen.

Curious, Freddie left the rat on the counter and followed him. He was sitting in the armchair, an open book in his lap.

"Not working on your super secret potion tonight?" she asked.

"Not right now, I need a break," he said, sipping his wine and turning the page.

"Maybe you need a fresh set of eyes?" she offered.

"No," he said shortly.

"Okay," she said amicably. "Just trying to help."

"Do you have your recipe to send off for publication?"

"Yeah," she said, pulling the folded parchment from her pocket and handing it to him. He opened it, scanned it, and nodded.

"You put my name on it too?"

"You deserve partial credit. I couldn't have done it without you. You taught me everything I know about Potions," she said, smiling at him, hoping flattery would work on him. He smiled back, briefly, then cleared his throat.

"Very well," he said, folding the parchment and tucking it into his pocket. "I will send it off in the morning when I get to Hogwarts."

"Thanks. Is it...okay if I sit in here and read with you?"

"I do not care what you do," he retorted, and turned his attention back to his book.

Pleased, Freddie pursued the dusty shelves, looking for something to read. She spent a few minutes looking at the books. She came across a particularly dusty section of the shelves. She used her thumb to wipe away the dust from the spines of some of the books and uncovered one titled _Defying Dementors. _

Intrigued, she pulled the book from the shelf. She used her t-shirt to clean the dust from the cover then took it to the couch to read. She stretched out on the couch, putting her feet up on one arm. Snape glanced up at her, at the title of the book, then grunted softly as he turned his attention back to his book.

Freddie spent the next hour pouring over the book, determined to figure out how to deal with dementors. If she ever came face to face with one again, she wanted to be able to defend herself. She read every word about Patronuses and how to cast one. On one page she discovered something drawn in the margins. A flower, possibly a lily. _Lily, _she realized, tracing the drawing with one finger. _Severus' friend. _

She sat up and pulled out her wand, pointing it at the ground. She tried to think of a happy memory. Kissing Snape was the first thing that came to mind.

_Expecto Patronum, _she thought determinedly.

A small wisp of silver came from her wand tip but disappeared immediately. Frowning slightly, she tried again.

"What are you doing, Miss Gray?" Snape asked, startling her.

"Oh, uh...a Patronus Charm, or at least I'm trying to," she answered.

"Why?"

"Well if I ever have the misfortune of meeting a dementor again, I want to be able to defend myself, to _do _something – other than run. I mean it was everything I could do just to run. I almost threw myself off the cliff, that – that _thing _just got into my head so bad, I couldn't...it took everything I had in me just to Disapparate."

Snape said nothing but stared at her intently, his expression unreadable.

"Can you cast one?" she asked curiously.

He exhaled slowly and closed his book. He pulled out his wand and closed his eyes. In the flickering firelight she saw his face soften.

"_Expecto Patronum_," he whispered, flicking his wrist.

A wisp of silver erupted from the tip of his wand and took the form of a doe. She was absolutely stunning. The silver-white light was dazzling, almost blinding in the way she outshone the fireplace and candles, filling the dark room with her light.

"Oh," Freddie uttered softly as the doe turned to her. The doe moved across the room sleekly, elegantly. When she reached the couch the doe sniffed her curiously.

Freddie held out one, trembling hand, unsure if she would be able to touch the creature or not. The book hadn't specified if they were solid or not. She looked ethereal, like a ghost, but brighter. The doe's ears flicked towards her then she moved her head, putting her muzzle under Freddie's outstretched palm.

"Don't-" Snape began but stopped.

Freddie let out a soft cry as her hand made contact with the Patronus. She felt warm to the touch but not only that. The warmth spread up Freddie's arm, encompassing her entire body in a feeling that could only be described as pure happiness and love.

When the doe vanished beneath her fingertips a moment later, the feeling dissipated so quickly it brought tears to her eyes.

"Wow," she said softly, blinking away the tears. There was a catch in her throat and she cleared it.

"I tried to warn you," Snape said softly. "It can be...shocking."

"I see," she said, wiping her hand across her eyes. "...I need to be able to do that. The wand movement you did-?"

"It had nothing to do with the wand movements," he said, shaking his head. "The key is the memory – the happier the memory, the better chance you have of producing a corporeal Patronus."

Freddie nodded and lifted her wand again. She thought back to that night at the end of last semester, when Snape had kissed her. How it felt, how her whole body had tingled as his scotch-soaked tongue explored her mouth.

"_Expecto Patronum_," she said, flicking her wand as he had...but still only vapor.

Snape shook his head slightly and returned his attention to his book.

Freddie kept practicing, over and over again, but only getting wisps.

_It has to be the memory, _she decided, after failing for what felt like the hundredth time. _It's a happy memory but it's too complicated, there's too much...drama surrounding it. Time to try something else. _

She wracked her brain for another happy memory. She thought of times with Daniel, flying, listening to music, but she knew that wouldn't work. Any time she thought of Daniel it made her sad.

_Okay, so, something else, _she thought. _Hmm..._

Then it hit her. She had felt happy an hour or so ago. When she'd finally gotten results from her Invisibility Antidote. She focused on that, that triumphant feeling.

"_Expecto Patronum_," she said hopefully.

A little more vapor, but nothing substantial. She tried again. And again. She noticed Snape's eyes flicking towards her periodically. She tried to ignore him and focus on her happy memory.

Eventually, Snape closed his book again and stood up.

"I'm going to bed," was all he said.

"That's it? No helpful tips? Advice?" she asked, feeling frustrated.

"No," he said. "It is a difficult charm to master. Many people cannot perform it."

"The book said if a Dark wizard or witch attempts a Patronus Charm they'll be consumed by maggots coming from their wand," she said uncertainly.

He paused and looked at her, an expression of surprise on his face. Then he did something that surprised her – he began to laugh. As much as she delighted in hearing the sound, she didn't like that it was directed at her.

"And _what _is so funny?" she asked, standing up and crossing her arms.

"You...you think you are a Dark witch? You think _your _soul is so damaged that your own magic would turn against you?" he asked, trying to fight back his laughter.

She shrugged uncertainly and dropped her arms.

"It is a charm to be cast by someone pure of heart. If anyone can cast it, hell if _I _can cast it, then so can you, little girl."

She smiled briefly at the term of endearment, one he hadn't used in weeks.

"Then why can't I do it?" she asked. "Why can't I cast a Patronus?"

"It is almost certainly because you have not found a happy enough memory. And that, Miss Gray," he said as he walked up the stairs. "I cannot help you with."


	67. Chapter 67

Later that night, Freddie lay in bed in her green satin pajamas, wand in hand, practicing the Patronus Char. She'd tried various memories, even going so far as to try memories of Daniel, but had no luck.

She kept thinking, trying to recall an uncomplicated happy memory. Going through her mind, her memories, and realizing just how few 'happy' memories she had was starting to get depressing. She started wishing Snape's doe Patronus was there, just to make her feel better.

_Wishful thinking, _she told herself.

She sighed and picked up Hemlock in her free hand. She hugged the kneazle close and kept thinking.

_My birthday, _she recalled. _Severus took me out to dinner. That was nice. I was certainly happy but no way that's strong enough. What about afterwards – the fireworks? Laying on the blanket on the outskirts of Hogsmeade, watching the fireworks – or _not _watching them while he played with my hair. _

She smiled at the memory.

_That was definitely nice. And it seemed not-so-complicated at the time. _

She focused on that, on the blissful feeling of Snape stroking her hair.

"_Expecto Patronum_," she said and a large amount of the silvery substance erupted from her wand tip. It didn't take the form of an animal, but it was the most progress she'd made so far.

Encouraged, she tried again, aiming her wand at the ceiling.

Suddenly, she heard a loud explosion that shook the entire house. She bolted upright and jumped out of bed.

"Severus!" she called as she rushed down the hall. "What was that?"

She reached his door and pounded on it.

"Severus! Are you okay? Severus!" she called, banging on the door. She heard no response. She tried the door but it was locked. Of course.

"_Alohomora_," she said, pointing her wand at the doorknob. It didn't work. She tried the spell he used to ward his office door. Nothing happened.

"Dammit, Severus! Answer me! Open the door!" she shouted.

She could smell something burning. She knew something must have happened with his secret potion, something bad. And he wasn't answering.

Heart pounding, Freddie took a step back.

"_Confringo!_" she shouted, blasting the door off its hinges.

She rushed into the room to find an exploded cauldron, several small fires burning, and Snape on the floor, his robes on fire. He wasn't moving.

"Severus!" she cried, racing over. She fell to her knees beside him and used her wand to extinguish the flames.

"Severus," she said, patting his face. He groaned softly, but didn't stir. _He's alive at least, _she thought, feeling a wave of relief wash over her. It didn't last long as she noticed a pool of blood forming beneath his head.

"Oh no – no, no, no," she said. She lifted his head and found a bleeding cut from where he had apparently hit the wall. She looked around wildly for something to stop the flow of blood. She spotted his cloak hanging up near the destroyed door. She needed to grab it but she couldn't leave him. Suddenly the cloak flew towards her. She grabbed it and pressed it to the wound, silently thanking her uncontrolled magic.

She sat there, pressing the cloak against the wound, feeling panicked and helpless.

_I need help, he's hurt really bad, I don't know what to do, I need help. But I can't Apparate with him like this, I can barely Apparate by myself if I tried to do Side-Along I might splinch us both. And I can't leave him, _she thought frantically. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. _Okay Freddie, calm down, you've got this. You know what to do. Stop the bleeding. You're doing that. Then Dittany._

She looked around, her eyes falling on a large desk he obviously used as a workstation. There were books and herbs and vials piled on it. She couldn't see from her spot on the floor if there was any Dittany.

_Use your wand, stupid._

"_Accio _Dittany," she said, pointing her wand at the desk. One of the drawers opened and a small bottle came flying towards her. Essence of Dittany. She was glad it was the more potent brew and not just the herb itself.

She set her wand down and uncorked the bottle with her teeth. She pulled the cloak away from Snape's head to see the bleeding had slowed but not stopped.

She poured the Dittany over the wound generously and it smoked as it began to mend. She cradled his head in her lap while the elixir did its job. She looked around the room, noticing there were still a few small fires burning. She picked up her wand.

"_Augamenti_," she said and a jet of water erupted from her wand. She used it to put out the flames, then looked back down.

The wound had closed and was covered in new, pink skin.

"Severus?" she said, smoothing his mussed hair back from his pale face.

He groaned again and his eyes fluttered open, his gaze unfocused.

"Winifred?" he said, his voice thick and sluggish. "...Ow."

His eyes closed again. She tried to rouse him but couldn't.

_Okay. Okay, well, he's alive. That's good. He's alive. _

She continued to cradle his head in her lap, stroking his forehead, as she looked around his bedroom. There was a queen-size bed in one corner, covered in a black quilt. His terrycloth bathrobe lay across the the bed. There was a nightstand with a candle and a few other items on it she couldn't see. There was a large chestnut wardrobe with a mirror on the door, but it was cracked. There were more bookcases, a door she assumed led to the bathroom, and the desk. There was a chair, like the one in his office, but it was upside down across the room, probably thrown by the explosion. Then there was a small fire pit, stationed in the center of the room, where he'd clearly been working on whatever it was. The exploded cauldron still lay in pieces around the room.

"What were you working on up here?" she murmured softly to him. "hm?"

He still didn't stir. Freddie exhaled softly. Slowly she moved his head from her lap and gently placed it on the balled up cloak. She stood, her legs trembling slightly, and walked over to the desk, skirting around the puddles of ruined potion.

She looked at the books on the desk and gasped softly. _The Nightshade Guide to Necromancy, The Resurrection Stone: Fact or Fable, Conjuration, Of Blood and Bone, Curious Corpses... _They were all books on raising the dead.

All of the books looked worn, each of them earmarked in several places, with bits of parchment stuck in some pages. There was a journal among the potion ingredients, like the one they used to keep notes in for the Invisibility Antidote.

_Exactly like that, _she thought as she flipped through it. It was filled with notes in Snape's scrawled handwriting, detailing failures, ideas, more failures. There were at least a hundred pages, probably more, crammed with notes.

_He has to have been working on this for years, _she realized.

"What were you trying to do, Severus?" she murmured, but the answer was obvious. He was trying to bring someone back to life.


	68. Chapter 68

**Author's Note: A nice long update for you guys! Hope you enjoy! And no worries - we will earn our M rating soon! **

Freddie knelt beside Snape on the floor. It worried her that he wasn't conscious, especially with a head injury. She didn't know what else to do. She didn't know who she could turn to for help. Maybe Dumbledore. But she couldn't leave Snape for the amount of time it would take for her to fetch Dumbledore. She wouldn't.

She decided to treat his other injuries, the burns. She hesitated a moment before unbuttoning his ruined shirt. She knew he wouldn't like it, but he wasn't conscious to protest and she needed to see the extent of his injuries. Her fingers trembled as she unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it away from his chest. The fabric clung to the burns and Snape groaned as she pulled it away.

"Winifred..." he said, almost like a whimper and it broke her heart.

"Severus? Can you hear me?" she asked but he didn't respond. "I've got you. You're gonna be okay. I've got you."

She couldn't help feeling like she was lying. _What if he's not okay? What if-...no. Don't think that. Focus. Burns._

She reached for the bottle of Dittany, but it was empty. She'd used it all on his head wound.

_That's not the best for burns anyway._

"Ah," she said, picking up her wand. "_Accio _burn salve."

She expected it to come from the desk. Instead a jar came flying through the destroyed door, from somewhere downstairs.

"That works," she said to herself.

She unscrewed the lid and dipped her fingers in the paste. She began to spread it thickly across his chest. Doing so she couldn't help but recall how he had tended her wounds before. How gentle he had been each time. _He cares about me. _

"I care about you, too, you stupid, frustrating man. What were you doing? I could have helped you, if you let me, if you'd just let me in," she said softly. "I wish you would just trust me. Just talk to me."

She continued spreading the salve until his burns were covered. She used her wand to cover the burns with bandages. She put the cap back on the jar and checked his head wound again. It looked okay, but she didn't know what was beneath the surface, bone or brain damage. She placed his head in her lap again so she could stroke his forehead. The action soothed her somewhat and she hoped it soothed him.

She didn't know how long she sat there, waiting for him to wake up, hoping, worrying, wondering if she should risk leaving him to go get help. She had almost made up her mind to go to Hogwarts when his eyes opened.

"Winifred," he groaned. "Stupid...I was stupid."

He tried to sit up.

"Stop," she said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You're injured. Your head – I did the best I could but I don't – you could have a skull fracture or – or brain swelling."

"I'm fine," he said, sitting up with a grunt. His face paled and he didn't try to stand.

"You are definitely not fine," she insisted. "You need to go to the hospital-"

"No."

"At least the Hospital Wing, let Madam Pomfrey-"

"No."

"_Severus_," she said, exasperated. "You're hurt, you need help-"

"I do _not _need your help," he snapped.

He got to his feet, stumbled, and nearly fell but Freddie jumped up and put herself under his arm, taking the brunt of his weight so he would stay upright.

"Right," she snorted.

He ignored her, staggering towards his bed. She helped him make it there and he sat on the edge of the bed and pushed her away but it was a weak effort.

"You need a Healer, Severus, or-"

"No," he said. "Go away, go back to your room. Leave me."

"Severus, you need help. If you don't I'll- I'll go to Dumbledore!"

His eyes darkened, and Freddie took a step back.

"You _dare _threaten me, you _insolent _little-"

He tried to stand but let out a grunt and sat back down on the bed.

"Severus," she pleaded. "You're hurt. _Please_."

She felt tears well in her eyes as she looked at him. He noticed and avoided her gaze.

"I'm fine," he muttered, staring at the floor. "I have a concussion, that is all."

"And burns," she said. "Bad ones. You were thrown against the wall, how can you be sure it's just a concussion."

"Because the wall is plaster, not stone," he said, looking to the hole in the wall. "I might have-" He inhaled sharply. "-cracked a rib or two. I will be fine."

Freddie looked at him, feeling distressed.

"_Severus_," she said softly.

"Why do you care?" he snapped. "You are not the one injured. Why won't you _leave me alone?_"

"Why? _Why_?" she said. "Because you're hurt, because your potion exploded, you could have _died! _Of course I'm worried about you. You're my friend and – and I care about you, you _idiot_!"

Snape watched her rant, then blew out a sigh and winced.

"I know," he sighed. "...In the hidden cabinet in the cellar, there is a Bone Knit Brew. That will help my ribs as well as my concussion. Fetch it."

She hesitated, not wanting to leave him alone.

"Go, Winifred. I am not going anywhere."

Finally she nodded. She stepped through the mess, over the broken door, and left his room. She hurried downstairs as quickly as possible and retrieved the potion. She also grabbed a Pain-Relieving Potion. She climbed the stairs back up to the second story, half expecting the door to Snape's room to be back on its hinges and sealed against her. She was pleased to see it wasn't.

She entered the room to find Snape standing, bracing himself against the desk.

"You should sit down," she said. He didn't give any indication he heard her.

She approached him slowly, saw him staring at the journal. She could tell from his face, the way his jaw was clenched, that he was hurting.

"You should have told me," she said quietly, coming to stand next to him. She put her hand over his on the desk. "I could help."

"No," he said softly. "No, you could not have helped. This is my own...my own ridiculous obsession."

He clenched his hand into a fist on the desk beneath hers.

"Your friend?" she said gently, cautiously. "You're trying to...bring her back?"

He said nothing but closed his eyes and nodded, almost imperceptibly. He moved suddenly, wrenching his hand away. He grabbed the journal and whirled, unsteady on his feet, and threw it into the fire. He nearly fell again and Freddie took his weight once more.

"Okay," she said, straining slightly under his weight. "Okay, back to bed. Come on."

He let her lead him back to bed and he sat. She looked at the fire, at the burning book, the pages being devoured by the flames.

_All those notes, all that work, _she thought.

"It is not the first time I have done that," Snape said as if he could read her mind. He groaned slightly as he moved to sit back against the headboard.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked softly, pulling the potions from her pocket.

"No," he said. "...Even if I could, she wouldn't...I am deluding myself. No, I do not want to talk about it."

"Okay. Here, drink this," she said, handing him the Bone Knit Brew. He took it, tried to uncork it but it was evident he was in pain. Freddie said nothing but covered his hands with hers and uncorked the bottle. He drank the potion quickly and she took the empty vial.

She uncorked the Pain-Relieving Potion and conjured a spoon, but Snape shook his head.

"No," he said. "It will cloud my brain."

"You're in pain."

"Pain is nothing."

"Severus," she said, meeting his gaze. "Please?"

He exhaled slowly, reached out and took the bottle from her. He took a swig, then put the bottle on the nightstand.

"I thought dosage was important?" she asked sardonically.

"You can leave now," he said, sliding down to lay down on the bed.

"No," she said, standing up. She walked across the room and turned the chair back over, pushing it back to the desk. "You have a concussion, you need to be monitored. I should know."

He let out a growl but she could tell the potion was working on him.

"I'm staying," she said firmly. "I'll sit here and read and monitor you, make sure you keep breathing."

"Can monitor myself," he muttered, his voice sounding tired. "You should go to your room...sleep."

"It doesn't work like that," she said dryly. "And I'm young, I can afford to lose some sleep."

Snape didn't say anything else and she assumed he had fallen asleep. She could remember the positively delightful feeling of the Pain-Relieving Potion. She was tempted to steal a sip herself, but she shook her head. She needed to stay awake, to watch Snape. She smiled at his sleeping form, hoping he was enjoying the effects of the potion. As she recalled, it made for some pretty fantastic dreams.

She turned to the desk, looked at the books left on the desk. She opened _The Nightshade Guide to Necromancy _curiously.

"Do not read that," Snape said thickly and Freddie glanced at him. His eyes were closed. "Necromancy is...a failed Dark Art."

"You should be asleep," Freddie said.

"I am asleep," he responded.

Freddie chuckled to herself. She closed the book and stood up from the desk. She used her wand to clean up the spilled potion and ruined cauldron, then walked over to the bookcase.

There were more books on the Dark Arts, several of them on Necromancy. She browsed the titles a moment, then selected a book called _Dark Animals Decoded. _

She read a few chapters, glancing at Snape periodically, at the steady rise and fall of his chest. She was reading a chapter on lethifolds when Snape spoke.

"What are you reading?" he asked.

She glanced at him. He hadn't moved but his eyes were open, staring at the ceiling.

"Uh, _Dark Animals Decoded,_" she answered. "Why aren't you asleep?"

"I cannot sleep with someone watching me," he responded. "It is unnerving. Must you sit there?"

"_Yes_, unless you'd rather I lay down with you?" she teased.

He grunted in response and scooted over on the bed. Surprised, she did not move for several minutes. Slowly she stood, bringing the book with her, and walked over to the bed. He lay perfectly still, his eyes closed, but there was no mistaking the perfect Freddie-sized space he'd made for her on the bed.

_Bad idea, bad idea, he's gonna yell at you, _she thought, but at the same time she told the little voice in her head to _shut up! _She kicked her boots off and carefully, slowly lay down beside him.

_Like a wild animal, no sudden movements, _she thought as she lay her head on the mattress. He had the only pillow. She opened the book, intending to keep reading, but she couldn't concentrate. She was overly aware of his presence next to her, the heat of his body, his scent. She was fighting to keep her breathing steady, her breaths even, like his.

She stared at the page on lethifolds, listening to his deep, steady breaths. It was like a mantra, deep breath in, slow exhale, putting her into a sort of trance. She could not know how much time had passed when the mantra changed and he began to snore. It was soft, gentle, and sort of cute.

Freddie smiled and had to bite her tongue to keep from chuckling. She listened to his soft snores until she finally started to relax. She read a few more chapters until her arms got tired of holding the book over her head. She rolled onto her side, careful not to disturb him.

She was reading about a creature called Swooping Evil when a flash of movement on the nightstand caught her eye. She lowered the book and saw a framed photograph of a red-haired young woman, sitting beneath a tree, smiling. She had a gorgeous smile and she waved at Freddie – or at whoever had taken the picture.

_Are you Lily? _She asked the picture silently. _You must be. Severus' friend, his best friend. His girlfriend? He's never said that but you must have been at some point. He loved you – he still loves you. He's been trying to bring you back – for years apparently. Probably since you died. What makes you so special?_

She scolded herself for even thinking it. It wasn't fair to either of them.

_So what happened to you? Severus let slip you had a falling out in school. Were you still in school when you died? Did you ever get the chance to reconcile?_

Snape groaned softly in his sleep and rolled over, facing her. Freddie held perfectly still and his soft snoring resumed. She continued to gaze at the picture of Lily, pondering.

_It must have hurt him to lose you. Badly. It broke him. That must be why he is the way he is, all closed off. I can't imagine how he felt, how he still feels...well, maybe I can. _

She thought of Daniel and put the book down, giving up her pretext of reading. She loved Daniel. Not the way Snape so clearly loved Lily, but still... She didn't know which was worse – knowing your friend was dead, or not knowing.

Snape shifted again in his sleep but this time he moved even closer to her. He let out a sound like a moan and reached out for her. Freddie's breath caught in her throat as she suddenly found herself wrapped in Snape's embrace. He threw his leg over both of hers. He had one arm around her body, just below her breast, and the other arm wedged beneath her head.

Freddie tried to force herself to breathe slowly, but her breath came out shaky. Snape was still snoring softly.

She moved carefully, trying to make her head more comfortable on his arm. He tightened his grip reflexively, pulling her closer. His hand threaded through her hair, coming to grip her forehead, holding her entire body tightly.

_Wow_, she thought silently. _Oh wow._

She wasn't exactly comfortable but her body didn't care. Arousal coursed through her at having him pressed so close, holding her so tightly.

Possessively_, _she thought. _Is that a term, possessive sleeper? ,,,I can't fall asleep like this. I'm somewhere between uncomfortable and aroused. Definitely uncomfortably aroused. But he's sleeping so soundly and this is the longest he's ever touched me without pulling away. I don't have to sleep. I can just lay here and enjoy it..._


	69. Chapter 69

Freddie didn't think that she would fall asleep. She spent hours just laying there, a feeling of blissfulness reverberating through her as she lay in his embrace. She planned to just lay there until morning, then try to slip away before he woke up. She knew if he woke up and found her in his bed – even though he'd technically invited her – he would probably not be happy. She liked to imagine that he would wake up, kiss her, make love to her...but given past experience, he was more likely to panic and yell at her to get out.

But at some point she did doze off. She didn't mean to but she did and when she did she had a dream she was being constricted by a boa constrictor. She woke with a gasp and opened her eyes to see the smiling picture of Lily.

She forced her body to relax when she realized Snape was still asleep. His face was nuzzled against her head, his warm breath tickling her ear every time he exhaled a soft snore.

Freddie smiled but her smile faded when she realized she was a little _too _relaxed – she needed to pee. Carefully she tried to extricate herself from Snape's limbs but the moment she moved he tightened his grip on her and burrowed his face in her hair, letting out a soft sigh before he resumed snoring.

His arm was around her neck now and she couldn't quite take a breath. On top of that her bladder felt like it was about to burst. She took a shallow breath and tried to move again, but his grip was firm.

_Okay, I have to get up. I'm going to pee myself or pass out. Maybe both. That would be mortifying. _

She cleared her throat and, after struggling a moment, finally wrenched herself free of his vice-like grip. She regretted having to do so and regretted it even more when his eyes flew open.

"Wha- Winifred?" he gasped.

"I have to pee," she said softly, feeling her cheeks grow warm. She turned away from the shocked, confused expression on his face and quickly scurried from the room. As she hurried down the hall she heard the sound of a bottle shattering against the wall. She grimaced.

_ He probably threw the Pain-Relieving Potion against the wall, _she thought as she went into the bathroom.

She quickly relieved herself and sighed. She paused to look at her reflection in the mirror. Her black hair was mussed, sticking up at odd angles. She smoothed it down. There was a slight red mark on her neck from Snape's grip. She smiled and chuckled slightly. She noticed the top button of her pajama top was undone.

_Did he do that? _She wondered as she re-buttoned it. _Surely I'd remember if he _fondled _me. _

She took a deep breath before leaving the bathroom, not sure what she was about to walk into. She walked back down the hall to find Snape's door back on its hinges and locked.

_My wand is in there, _she realized. _I left it on the nightstand. And my boots are in there. _

"Severus?" she said softly, knocking on the door. "I left my wand..."

She waited a minute but he didn't answer. She sighed softly. _I guess I don't need my wand right now, _she thought. She checked her watch. It was 6 a.m. She didn't know how long she'd slept but was definitely still tired.

She walked barefoot back to her room. She left the door open a bit, in case he decided he wanted to talk.

_ Unlikely, _she thought with a snort as she lay down on her bed and picked up Hemlock. She sighed and hugged the kneazle to her chest. It was nowhere near as good as having Snape holding her. She pulled the blanket over herself and sighed again.

_ Well, _she thought drowsily. _At least he's alive. If he's throwing things and he fixed the door, he's fine. I can get some sleep. _

When she woke a few hours later, the sun was streaming through the window. She blinked away the sleepiness and saw her wand laying on her nightstand, next to the picture of her and Daniel. She sat up and looked around. Her boots were on the floor, next to her bed.

Freddie got up and went down the hall to Snape's room. She didn't knock but pressed her ear to the door. She heard nothing. There was no light under the door. He was either asleep or he wasn't in there. She'd never known him to sleep so late in the morning, so she assumed the room was empty.

She headed downstairs, sort of hoping she would find him in the sitting room or kitchen. He wasn't there. She even checked the cellar. He definitely wasn't home. _Avoiding me again, _she thought. She sighed and headed back to the kitchen to find some breakfast.

#

Snape came home late that evening. Freddie was in the sitting room when he Apparated. She'd spent the afternoon cleaning in there, getting dust from every nook and cranny in the room. She'd found a spare sheet in a closet upstairs and draped it across the threadbare sofa. She used a Color-Changing Charm to turn it black. She thought it looked better that way.

She was stretched out on the couch, reading, when he appeared. His face registered no emotion when he saw her, but he took a few steps towards her. She sat up and he handed her an envelope.

"Dumbledore," he said shortly.

Curious, she opened it to find a glittering object inside. She dumped it into the palm of her hand.

"My Gringotts key," she said, surprised. "How did he-"

She looked up, but Snape was gone.

The next morning Freddie got up early and got dressed to go to Diagon Alley. It was a hot day so she put on shorts and a tank top, along with the cloak Snape had given her months ago. She went downstairs first, just in case Snape was home she wanted to tell him where she was going. But, of course, he wasn't home. She thought about leaving him a note but decided not to. He probably wouldn't even be home before she got back.

When she Apparated in Diagon Alley, the street was bustling. It was a beautiful Saturday morning. The sun was shining, it was warm but not uncomfortably so. Freddie sighed contentedly and headed into Gringotts to withdraw some money.

She spent the morning wandering around Diagon Alley. She bought some new clothes, since most of her wardrobe had been left behind at Gray Manor. She spent the most time in the bookstore, buying several new books to read including a recently-released book of new healing potions.

She was walking towards the Apothecary, browsing through the textbook when she heard music. She closed the book and followed her ears to a music store she'd never noticed before. She didn't recognize the music that was blaring through the small building as she walked in, but she liked it. The singer had a guttural, husky voice and the lyrics she could understand seemed like nonsense but still she liked the music.

There were a few kids in the store but she didn't recognize any of them. _Hufflepuffs maybe or Gryffindors, _she thought as she began to browse the records. _Some of them are young, too young for Hogwarts. _

She browsed the wizarding bands, selecting a few records to buy. One was a band called _Weeping Werewolves. _The cover art had a picture of a full moon overshadowing the figure of a wolf, his mouth open in a mournful howl. She'd never heard of them, but was intrigued by the idea of werewolves in a band.

She had wandered over to the Muggle section and was flipping through records when a bright-eyed young witch appeared beside her.

"Hi there! Can I help you find anything?" she asked cheerfully.

"Uh, yeah – what's the band that's playing?"

"Oh that's Nirvana! They're American but they're blowing up worldwide. They're good, yeah?"

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "I like the singer's voice, it's sort of gravelly."

"That's Kurt Cobain, their lead singer. Here's their album," she said, picking up a vinyl. The cover art was a naked baby boy swimming under water with a piece of green paper in front of him.

_American currency, _she thought. She recognized it from Gringotts. The album was titled _Nevermind. _

"It's their second album," the witch told her. "Their first was called _Blew, _but trust me this is the one you want."

"Alright," Freddie agreed, following her to the counter with her other purchases.

"_Weeping Werewolves, _huh?" the girl said as she rang her up. "They're good. A little emo."

"Emo?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, you know, emo. Emocore. It's a style of rock, kinda like punk but with more complex emotional subjects. Emotional hardcore."

"Ah. Are they really werewolves?"

"Yep. They're all young folks who were bitten as kids except their drummer he's like 40 something. He goes by the name Bloodmoon."

"Cool," Freddie said as she paid for her records. That's when she noticed the witch's name tag – _Danielle. _

"Your name's Danielle?"

"Yeah, Danielle Ryan. Why?"

"Just curious," she lied. "My name's Freddie."

"Nice to meet you, Freddie. Sort of an odd name for a girl – no offense," she added quickly.

"None taken," Freddie assured her. "It's short for Winifred, but I only let one person call me that."

"Cool. 'Freddie'. I like it," Danielle said, smiling. "Well Freddie, I hope to see you around."

"Definitely. Thanks for your help," she said, taking her bag.


	70. Chapter 70

**Authors Note: I am posting two chapters at once because i love you guys so be sure you read 69 before coming here! Thanks and as always plz review! **

Freddie stepped out of the record store, blinking in the bright sunlight. She checked her watch. It was close to noon so she decided to get some lunch before heading to the Apothecary.

She ate at a little shop simply called _The Bistro. _She had a BLT and a salad, sitting outside at a small table so she could enjoy the sunlight. She was finishing off her salad when she heard a familiar voice on the street. She looked up to see Geck walking with Richard Perkins and two other Ravenclaw boys.

They hadn't spotted her yet but if they kept walking this way they would for sure. She stood quickly, wishing her cloak had a hood, and started up the street. She glanced behind her and saw that Geck had his wand out. She'd been spotted.

She walked faster, reaching into her pocket as she did so. She took a sharp turn down a side street, popped the cork on the vial in her hand, and quickly downed the Invisibility Potion. She hid her bags behind a dumpster and flattened herself against the wall as Geck came running down the alley with his wand out.

"Dammit! Where'd she go?" Geck said as his friends came around the corner. He kicked over a few large boxes, even looked inside the dumpster.

"She probably Disapparated, Geck," Perkins said, shaking his head. "Come on. You don't really wanna start trouble with Gray, do you?"

"Outside of Hogwarts, without Professor Bastard for her to hide behind? You bet your arse I do," Geck said, glowering.

"Daniel's gone, Geck, and Dumbledore doesn't think Gray had anything to do with it. If he did, she wouldn't still be at Hogwarts."

"Just cuz there's no proof," Geck said, shaking his head. "You don't know her, she's a Slytherin. She's conniving, evil, just like the rest of them. Her parents were Death Eaters, you know? They're in Azkaban and she should be too!"

"I dunno, Geck," Perkins said doubtfully.

"She _knows _something, Ricky, she knows something about Daniel, I know she does. If she didn't kill him she knows who did," he growled. "She has to..."

"Well she's gone now," Perkins said. "Come on, let's get something to eat. I'm starving."

Geck looked around the alley once more before following his friends back out onto the street. Freddie stayed against the wall a moment longer, then exhaled slowly. She no longer wanted to visit the Apothecary. She didn't want to risk running into Geck again. She'd defend herself if she had to, but she didn't want to fight. She didn't want to hurt anyone. She gathered her bags from behind the dumpster and Disapparated.

#

That evening Freddie decided she would try her hand at cooking something other than soup. She'd gone to the Muggle grocery store and gotten a ham, potatoes, beans and rolls. She put the ham in the oven as soon as she got home. She didn't quite understand the controls on the electric over and Snape wasn't home to ask for help. Still after fiddling with it a bit she thought she had it right.

She sat at the kitchen table with the bag of potatoes. She opened her magical cookbook and found the section on peeling potatoes using magic. She pulled out her wand and after a bit of trial and error she soon had the potatoes peeling themselves.

The ham would take several hours, according to the recipe, so she left the peeled potatoes in the sink with some water. She went upstairs to get her record player so she could listen to her new records. She decided to put on one of her new outfits – a short black sundress with spaghetti straps. It was lightweight cotton material and very comfortable. It had a wide neckline that showed off some of her chest but not too much. It scooped even lower in the back, exposing the skin to about midway down her back.

_This would be a comfortable outfit for brewing potions in this hot weather, _she thought as she carried the record player downstairs.

She set up the player on the kitchen table and put on the Nirvana vinyl to listen to. She danced around the kitchen for a bit, putting up the rest of the groceries she'd gotten. Then she sat at the table with her new potions book and made a list of ingredients she'd need to get at the Apothecary. She had decided to go back after dinner and Apparate directly there, figuring she was less likely to run into Geck that way.

When she finished her list, she began to dice the potatoes with her wand. She found the action somewhat satisfying, slicing the potatoes over and over again until they were in one inch cubes. She got a large pot from the cabinet under the sink and put the potatoes in it. She filled it with water and put it on the stove.

She was standing at the stove, waiting for the potatoes to boil when Snape Apparated directly into the kitchen. She expected him to stride off to his room but he just stood there, drinking in the sight of her in the little black dress.

"Hello," she said finally and his eyes flicked to her face.

"We need to talk," he said.

"I have a ham in the oven."

"We need to talk," he repeated, approaching her. "About the other night."

Freddie sighed and turned to face him.

"We don't have to. I know what you're going to say."

"Oh you do, do you?"

"You're going to say it was a mistake, it can't happen again, blah blah blah. I know," she said, turning back to the stove.

He grabbed her arm and pulled her around to face him. His dark eyes seemed to stare into her soul, his nostrils flared as he exhaled slowly.

"What do you want from me, Winifred?" he asked, his voice soft but strained. He still had his hand on her arm, but it didn't hurt. She glanced down at his hand, then looked back up at him.

"I'm not quite sure how to answer that," she said truthfully. He met her eyes, his gaze unwavering. With his free hand he brushed her hair back off of her shoulder. He touched her face gently caressing her cheek with his thumb. She felt her face flush and he smirked slightly. He trailed his thumb down her face and brushed it across her lips, making her gasp softly.

"Is this what you want?" he murmured.

Unable to speak, Freddie nodded. He stared at her a moment longer, then lowered his head and kissed her.

She gasped into the kiss, not expecting it to actually happen. It started soft then quickly grew rougher as he deepened the kiss. He grabbed both her arms, pulling her to him possessively. She grasped his shirt reflexively, unable to think clearly as his tongue explored her mouth.

He withdrew slowly and she let out a whimper. He smirked into the kiss and nipped her bottom lip before pulling away. He didn't turn away, didn't run, but still held her tightly.

"That is what you want, is it not? More of that?" he asked, his voice a low growl.

"Uh-huh," she said, feeling light-headed.

"Hmm," he said, pressing her back against the counter. "You _care _for me, little girl, I can accept that. Can you accept that your feelings are unrequited? Can you accept that I will never love you?"

The words stung a bit. She looked up at him, confused.

"What-" she swallowed heavily, her body responding to the kiss, to being pinned against the counter by his body. "What are you proposing then?"

"There's no denying the...physical attraction, as much as I have tried to," he said in a low voice. He moved his hand up her arm to touch her face again, stroking her jaw with one finger.

"So a- ah," she gasped as his finger traced her lower lip. "A _physical _relationship? Is that what you're suggesting?"

His eyes darkened and he got a hungry look in his eyes. He moved his mouth close to her ear to whisper, his breath hot on her skin.

"What I am _suggesting, _Miss Gray, is that I use you...in the way you so _desperately _want me to use you, only on _my _terms. Do you understand?" he murmured.

Freddie swallowed again and bit her lower lip as his lips traced the curve of her ear.

"I think so," she whispered.

"You think so? Does that mean you consent? Do you consent to being used, by me? To being a distraction, for me, a source of pleasure only?"

"Yes," she whimpered. "Yes, that's – that's what I want."

_Is that what I want? _But as he moved his mouth from her ear to claim her lips again, the answer was a resounding _yes!_

#


	71. Chapter 71

**Author's Note: M rating ahead! **

He buried one hand in her hair, pulling her mouth hard against his like he was trying to devour her. His other hand was behind her, stroking the exposed skin of her back. Then he dropped both hands to her waist, clutching her hips as he continued kissing her. Then he picked her up, put her on the counter and maneuvered himself between her legs. She wrapped her legs around him as she kissed him back, worried that at any moment he would change his mind, turn around and leave her.

Snape put his arms around her, caressing her back, sending shivers through her. When his hands went to her shoulders, pushing the straps of her dress off, she gasped, breaking the kiss. She tried to catch her breath, but his lips went to her neck and she threw her head back as he began to kiss her there. His lips traced kisses along the newly exposed skin of her throat. His tongue passed over her pulse point and she gasped again. She felt him smirk against her skin right before he nibbled the spot he'd just kissed, making her moan loudly.

Freddie heard him chuckle softly as he began to nip and suck his way down her neck, to her chest. His hands were pulling her dress down, exposing the tops of her breasts and she knew any moment that's where his mouth would be.

She let out a whimper of need, of want, but also of uncertainty.

_I want this, god knows I've wanted this, but if he doesn't slow down he's gonna have me naked on the kitchen counter and I've never..._

"What's wrong?" he asked, lifting his head from her chest to look at her. She could feel his cock through his trousers, throbbing against her thigh. "Do you want to stop?"

"No!" she exclaimed loudly, panting slightly. "I-uh-I- my potatoes!"

He looked to the stove where the pot was almost to the point of boiling over. He whipped out his wand and vanished the whole thing. He tossed his wand on the counter and went back to kissing her neck.

"Hey!" she protested. "I was making dinner."

"Do you want to stop?" he asked again.

"N-no, but, ah- do w-we have to do this here?" she asked breathlessly.

He lifted his head and pulled back slightly, looking down at her with one eyebrow raised.

"I mean, I'll do whatever you want but, I, uh..." she trailed off, not sure what she was saying. She could barely think straight, her mind clouded with lust.

"You will do whatever I want, hm?" he asked in a low voice, almost a growl. "Anything I say?"

"Anything," she vowed, her heart pounding in her chest.

"If I want to have you on the counter, I will have you on the counter. Or bent over the kitchen table. Anywhere I want."

"Yes sir," she said, not sure why she called him 'sir' other than it felt right in the moment. He seemed to approve as a twisted smile crossed his lips.

He took a step back and looked at her sitting on the counter, her dress half off her shoulders, panting slightly.

"Stand up," he said, his voice quiet but commanding.

Freddie slid her butt off the counter and stood before him on trembling legs. He smirked at her and she felt herself flush under his gaze.

"Take off your dress," he ordered.

"W-what?" she asked, unsure if she'd heard him right.

"You said you would do whatever I want, obey my every command?" he asked and she nodded. "Take off... your dress."

Freddie inhaled sharply. Slowly she reached for the straps of her dress, sliding it down until it pooled beneath her on the floor. She was left standing before him in a simple black bra and black cotton panties.

_If I'd known this was going to happen, had any inclination, I would have worn something cuter, something lace, _she thought, growing warm as he looked her over slowly drinking in her appearance.

"Nice," he said, walking around her. "_Very _nice."

Freddie didn't say anything but blushed harder, pleased he thought so.

Suddenly his hand flew and gave her a hard smack on the bottom, causing her to yelp in surprise.

"When I compliment you I expect you to say 'thank you', understand?"

"Yes sir," she gasped. "Thank you, sir."

"Good girl," he said approvingly and Freddie felt herself grow wetter.

He continued to walk around her, inspecting her. Freddie stood, hands clasped behind her back, waiting for him to tell her what to do next. He reached out and put his hand on the clasp of her bra.

"What would you do if I took this off? Hmm?" he asked, toying with the clasp. She shivered with nervous excitement.

"I would...let you," she answered. "Sir."

She didn't have to look behind her to know he was smirking. In one deft movement he undid the clasp. She heard his sharp intake of breath as her bra fell away, revealing her pale c-cup breasts. He put his arms around her from behind and it was Freddie's turn to gasp again as he cupped her breasts. He just held her a moment and Freddie could feel him, feel his hard cock against her backside. She pressed herself back against him and he groaned softly, squeezing her breasts in response.

He lowered his head, breathing in the scent of her hair, before nuzzling her neck. Her legs felt weak as he began kissing her neck. He caressed the nipple of her left breast with his thumb, sending a bolt of fresh arousal through her. He repeated the action then pinched her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. She gasped and he pinched harder, slowly exerting more pressure until she couldn't suppress a whimper of pain. He released her nipple and let out a growl as he sucked hard on her neck, mixing pleasure with the pain.

He repeated the action on her right breast, squeezing her nipple until she yelped. She felt his cock twitch against her.

_He likes this, _she realized. _Causing me pain...and pleasure._

She moaned as he trailed kisses to her shoulder, nipping her lightly, before releasing her all of a sudden and taking a step back. She whimpered at the loss of contact and he walked around her, smirking.

"What next, I wonder?" he said in a slightly mocking tone. His eyes traveled down her body to the last scrap of fabric on her body. She shuddered again.

"Want me to take them off?" she asked, trying to sound coy and not as nervous as she actually felt.

"Do you want to take them off?" he asked silkily. She considered a moment.

"I will if you want me to, sir," she said, clasping her hands behind her back.

"Good girl, that is a good answer," he said, his eyes traveling up her torso coming to rest on her breasts. His eyes glazed over and he seemed distracted a moment.

"I think we should go upstairs," he said finally, his voice raspy.

"If that's what you want, sir," she said obediently, thinking that at this point she didn't care if he did take her on the counter, the table, the floor – anywhere.

He let out a hum of approval and smacked her butt lightly.

"Go," he said.

"Yes sir," she said, walking towards the door then she paused. "I have a ham in the oven."

He stepped towards the oven and looked at it.

"It is not on," he said, sounding amused. "That is just the timer."

"Aw, what? I've had it on for hours!"

"Actually you have not," he said, pressing a button to turn the timer off. "I will teach you to use it later...I have a much more _interesting _lesson for you at the moment. Go."

**Author's Note: So I have two more chapters ready to post right now. If I post them tonight it might be a few days before I have anything else ready to post. So do y'all want all the goodies all at once (again) or do you want a chapter a day? Review and let me know!**


	72. Chapter 72

**A/N: Posting 3 chapters tonight so be sure you start with 71, dont want anyone to miss out! **

A shiver went through her as she walked out of the kitchen. She walked through the sitting room, feeling overly aware of her nudity. Her breasts jiggled freely as she climbed the stairs, an unusual feeling. She paused in the hallway. He hadn't told her which room to go in, he'd only said go upstairs.

Freddie crossed her arms over her chest, feeling awkward and exposed as she waited.

_Is this really happening? _She thought, feeling nervous and excited. _Is this really going to happen? What changed his mind? He said he's been trying to fight the attraction – for how long, I wonder? Whatever changed his mind...I'm glad he did. _

She heard Snape's footsteps on the stairs and turned to face him as he joined her. He crossed the hall wordlessly, grabbed her arms and pulled them away from her chest.

"No," he said simply and she nodded in understanding, clasping her hands behind her back. He pinched her nipple lightly before turning away. He glanced towards his room, then seemed to make a decision. He opened the door to her room and looked to her.

"Inside," he said and she hastened to obey. He smacked her butt again as she passed him in the doorway. She stood in the middle of the room, waiting, as he came in, closing the door behind him.

He looked around her room, ignoring her or at least pretending to. He walked over to her bed and picked up Hemlock. Freddie blushed, feeling slightly embarrassed even though he already knew she slept with a stuffed animal. Snape smirked and placed the kneazle on her bedside table, covering the photo of her and Daniel.

He sat on her bed, finally looking up at her. Freddie was trembling with anticipation of what would happen next. His dark eyes roamed her body and Freddie bit her lower lip.

"What am I going to do with you?" he mused aloud.

"Are you asking me, sir?"

"Hm. What do you think I should do with you?"

"Fuck me I hope, sir," she said boldly, feeling her cheeks flush as the words left her mouth.

"Such foul language," he said, smirking at her. "Come here."

She crossed the room eagerly, coming to stand in front of him. He put his hands on her hips, pulling her between his knees. He teased the waistband of her panties and she silently pleaded for him to take them off.

"On your knees," he ordered and she immediately dropped to her knees in front of him. She looked up at him, biting her lower lip again.

"I like that look on your face, that nervous look," he said, stroking her head. "Are you scared?"

"N-no," she said. "Excited. Nervous, maybe, a little."

"Why are you nervous?"

"I, uh, I don't know," she stammered. He looked down at her, clearly waiting for an answer. She considered it a moment. "I guess I'm worried I might...disappoint you."

"Ah, do not worry, little girl," he said, cupping her cheek. "You will not disappoint me."

He dropped his hand and began to undo his belt. He whipped his belt off, tossed it aside, then undid his pants. She let out a gasp as his cock was freed.

It was at least 6 inches from what she could see, and thick. The head glistened with pre-cum and she licked her lips eagerly.

"Do you want to suck it?" he asked.

She tried to look up at him but she couldn't tear her gaze away from his cock.

"Yes sir," she whispered, and when he didn't respond she added. "...Please?"

"Do it," he said.

She gave him an experimental lick and his cock twitched in response. She licked him again, a long slow lick up his shaft to the head of his cock. She licked the glistening fluid from the tip, the salty flavor spreading across her tongue before she closed her mouth over it.

She had done this before, with Ryan from Borgin and Burke's, that summer she'd experimented with him. She knew she was good at this...but then again, Ryan had been a teenager. Snape was a grown man.

She took as much of him into her mouth as she could, caressing him with her tongue as she did so. She heard him groan and she smirked to herself. She sucked, swirling her tongue around the head of his cock as she came up. He groaned again and grabbed her head, burying his fingers in her hair. He tightened his grip in her hair as she took him deep into her mouth again.

"Faster," he grunted and she complied.

She sucked and licked, bobbing her head up and down, his hands in her hair guiding her rhythm. His cock seemed to grow larger and she began to choke slightly, unable to keep up her rhythm of sucking while still drawing air into her lungs.

"I don't care if you're choking," he hissed, pushing her back down on his cock as she tried to come up for a breath. "Breathing doesn't matter. Nothing matters but this – my cock, my pleasure."

Somehow this turned her on even more and she felt wetness starting to drip down her thighs. She tried to hold her breath, to keep going, desperate to please.

"Good girl," he groaned. "That's it, good girl."

Encouraged by the praise, she went faster, sucking in small breaths through her nose when she could. Between her own legs was burning with intense need. She slipped one hand between her legs, eager for relief. Her panties were absolutely soaked and she began to rub herself through them.

"No," Snape said sharply, panting slightly. "No touching...without permission." He groaned again. "Hands...Hands where I can see them."

She groaned in disappointment and put her hands on his thighs. He tightened his grip in her hair until it hurt just a little. She whimpered but did not stop sucking. Suddenly he forced her head down, forced his cock deep into her throat as it erupted. She choked, trying to swallow the hot cum that flooded her mouth. She couldn't breathe but forced herself not to pull away. She swallowed as much as she could until she felt his hands release her head. She pulled back, gasping for breath, coughing and spluttering. Snape stroked her head with one limp hand while she tried to catch her breath.

When she recovered enough so that she knew she wasn't going to die, she began to lick him again. Snape gasped as she cleaned him with her tongue, and his cock began to grow hard again.

"Stop," he said and she did so reluctantly, rocking back on her heels to look up at him. "I was impatient, but you were...particularly impressive."

"Thank you, sir," she said, remembering his command in the kitchen and the hard smack to her butt.

"Stand up," he said and she did as told. He stood, forcing her to take a step back. "Now, lay down on the bed."

"On my stomach or my back, sir?"

"On your back, little witch."


	73. Chapter 73

**A/N: Posting 3 chapters tonight so be sure you start with 71! Dont want anyone to miss out Review when you reach the end plz! ❤️**

She lay across the bed on her back, looking up at the ceiling. She heard Snape's pants drop on the floor. She looked up at him to see him watching her hungrily. He unbuttoned his shirt with quick, nimble fingers and shed it.

He crouched over her on the bed and kissed her again. She was so distracted by the kiss she almost missed his hands traveling to her hips. He slipped two fingers beneath the waistband of her panties and again she was thinking _please, please take them off, please._

This time her silent prayers were answered and he pulled them off.

"These are quite wet, Winifred," he said, balling them up in his hand. "What has made you so wet?"

Freddie blushed furiously beneath his gaze, beneath the smirk on his lips.

"Answer me," he ordered, sliding his hand up her leg slowly.

"You, sir," she whimpered. "K-kissing you, you touching me, a-and..."

His hand stopped, just above her knee, several inches from where she desperately wanted it, _needed _it.

"And?" he said teasingly, stroking her thigh with one long finger but not going any higher.

"S-sucking your cock," she said. "Please, Severus, please."

"Please what?" he asked, smirking down at her.

"Please...touch me, fuck me, something, anything, _please_."

"So desperate," he said, inching his finger closer but at an agonizingly slow pace. She let out a frustrated growl and grabbed his hand, intent on putting it where she wanted it.

"Oh no you don't," he said, grabbing both of her hands in his and pinning them above her head. "You are going to regret that, little girl."

"I already do," she whimpered, squirming beneath him, trying to get some contact.

He moved off of her and Freddie whined a bit. He grabbed her suddenly, pulling her across his lap. He hit her hard, without warning, and she let out a cry of surprise. His hand came down hard on her ass a second time, then a third. She squirmed in his lap, feeling his cock grow rock hard beneath her belly.

"Please," she whimpered and yelped as he hit her again. "I'm sorry."

He smacked her hard a fifth and final time, then rested his hand against the heated flesh. He stroked her ass gently and she trembled, worried he would hit her again but also sort of wanting him to. The pain mixed with pleasure was making her more aroused than she'd ever been.

He continued to stroke the warm flesh of her ass, then his hand moved down to her thigh. He slid his hand between her legs and cupped her heated sex. She whimpered and collapsed in his lap, her body feeling like jello all of a sudden. He chuckled softly and rolled her off of his lap and onto her back.

"Are you going to behave?" he asked, looking down at her.

"Yes," she said softly.

"Are you sure? I _do _enjoy seeing you suffer," he said, stroking her thigh.

"Yes sir," she said and gasped as he spread her legs. "I will behave, I'll do...whatever you want me to, sir."

"I know you will," he said and caressed her slit, making her gasp again. He ran his fingers through the damp curls covering her sex before gently parting her labia.

He teased her clit with one finger, then two, making her squirm and moan. Every time she got close to orgasm he would back off, making her whimper until she was almost to the point of crying.

"_Please_," she said desperately with tears in her eyes. He smirked and moved his fingers down to enter her – then stopped suddenly, the surprise evident on his face.

"You're a virgin," he gasped softly.

"Wha- yes, but- where are you going?" she demanded as he pulled away. "Wait-"

She grabbed his arm but he shook her off. He grabbed his wand from the bedside table and conjured a vial. Her confusion was evident as he turned back to her.

"You may not appreciate this as much in the moment as you will later, virgin's blood is an invaluable potion ingredient and quite rare these days," he explained.

"Okay, just – quickly, please?" she asked desperately.

"We will go as quickly or as slowly as I like, Winifred," he said in a low voice.

She nodded and he rewarded her by caressing her clit again. She moaned and arched her hips desperately. He teased her until she was close again then he slipped his fingers down and penetrated her. The pain was sharp but brief. She felt him move the vial between her legs and do something that felt more clinical than sexual. Then he corked the vial and stood to put it on the bedside table.

He stood over her, looking down at her again, drinking in her appearance.

"Please?" she pleaded, looking up at him. "Please, Severus, I...I'll do anything you want, just – please."

He smiled slowly, an almost feral look. Then he grabbed her legs and pulled her to the edge of the bed.

"I _do _love hearing you beg," he said, leaning over her. He gave her a swift kiss. "Tell me you want it."

"I want it, please, I need it."

"What do you _need_, Winifred?" he whispered.

"Your cock, please, sir."

He exhaled slowly and, gripping her hips tightly, positioned himself at her entrance.

"Tell me again," he said softly. "Tell me what you want."

"I want you inside me, please, I need-"

And then he was inside her, filling her up slowly, and then they both shared a moan.

"My God," she groaned, wrapping her legs around him, eager to pull him in deeper.

"No," he said, grabbing her arms and pinning her to the mattress. "On _my _terms, my speed. _Mine_."

She moaned loudly as he began to thrust into her, keeping her pinned to the mattress. She was there in moments and could feel herself starting to spasm around his cock when he told her to stop.

"No," he grunted. "Not until I tell you."

"What?" she asked, confused, as he slowed his pace.

"You do not cum until I tell you."

"W-I-c-can't wait," she said desperately and he stopped. He didn't pull out but remained still, looking down at her with another damned smirk.

"_Why_?" she whined, desperate and frustrated.

"Because I can. Because I like it," he hissed. "I like making you wait, hearing you beg, seeing you desperate...breaking you."

She whimpered, distressed, and he lowered his mouth to kiss her, silencing her whines. He broke the kiss from her mouth and trailed his lips to her neck. He kissed and nibbled, having quickly learned the spots that would drive her crazy.

He kissed the hollow of her throat then sucked the spot hard, hard enough to leave a mark. She moaned loudly and she felt his cock twitch inside of her. With a soft growl he lowered his mouth to her breast.

He kissed her left breast while kneading the right with one hand, keeping her hands pinned above her head with his other hand. She whimpered again as he closed his mouth over her nipple. His mouth was hot and wet as he flicked her nipple with his tongue. Then he gently scraped it with his teeth, causing her to writhe beneath him and moan.

"Hmm," he said, sounding intrigued with her nipple still in his mouth. He bit her gently and she let out a cry as it sent shocks of pleasure through her.

He bit a little harder, then soothed it with his tongue after she let out another cry. He released her nipple with a pop as he began to move in long slow thrusts. She whimpered as she felt her orgasm building again.

"Please," she said, knowing she wouldn't be able to stop it. "Please, please, please."

He said nothing but continued his thrusts until she was right on the brink.

"Cum," he commanded in a low, panting voice. "Cum now."

The released washed over her like a tidal wave. Waves of pleasure rolled through her, so strong it brought tears to her eyes. Snape was still thrusting inside of her as her orgasm subsided, until he came with a low, guttural groan, exploding inside of her.

He rolled off of her, then pulled her to him in a loose embrace while they both breathed heavily. When he caught his breath he moved, pulling her limp body with him so he could lay on her pillow. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and threw one leg over hers, mimicking their sleeping position from the other night. Only this was different, better, with their sweat-slicked skin pressed together.

He buried her face in her hair and let out a soft sight. Freddie was still trembling from the force of her orgasm and he tightened his grip on her. One hand was cupping her breast, idly teasing her nipple until his fingers stilled and he began to snore softly.

"Severus?" she whispered, finally finding her voice.

"Mm?" he said drowsily.

"Are you..." she cleared her throat slightly, her voice a little hoarse. "Are you going to wake up tomorrow, realize this was all a mistake, say it can't happen again."

"Mm. No. Don't worry, little witch," he murmured in her ear. "I thought this through. I have spent the last two days thinking it through and tonight only confirmed it. Tonight gave me more pleasure than the universe has provided me with in the last decade. I plan on taking full advantage of it – of you – for the time being. Do you find that acceptable?"

"More than acceptable," she whispered in response.

"Mm," he said, kissing her ear. "So long as you continue to obey me, we will not have a problem. Now...sleep."

Freddie nodded and relaxed into his embrace. His low voice commanding her to sleep, coupled with the most intense orgasm she'd ever had in her life, was like a sedative. She closed her eyes and the last thing she heard before she drifted off was Snape's soft snores in her ear.


	74. Chapter 74

#

When Freddie woke up she was alone with Hemlock in her arms. She thought, for a moment, that it may have been a dream until she stretched and every inch of her body hurt, especially between her legs. She sat up, groaning slightly.

The small vial of her blood sat on the bedside table. There was no trace of Snape anywhere. She wrapped her quilt around herself and hugged Hemlock to her chest. Snape was gone.

She noticed the bruises on her chest, small bruises on her breasts. She smiled faintly but her heart ached. He had said he wouldn't regret it, but he was gone.

She stood, shedding the blanket, and placed Hemlock on her pillow. She pulled a clean nightgown out of the dresser and slipped it over her head, still not totally comfortable being naked in his house, even if she was alone. She crossed the hall to the bathroom, relieved herself, and started to go back to bed when she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror.

There were bruises, red marks, all up and down her neck, across her collarbone. Hickeys. She smiled and touched them gingerly. He had been rough, rougher than she ever expected, but it had been...amazing. Undoubtedly so.

She sighed wistfully and left the bathroom. She was almost to her room when she caught the smell of something cooking. Curious, she followed her nose down the stairs to the kitchen where she found Snape standing at the stove.

He had eggs in the frying pan, a cup of tea in one hand and a spatula in the other. There was another cup of tea waiting for her at the table. She stared at the scene before her, trying to make sense of it.

"Are you okay?" he asked, glancing at her.

"I feel like I've stepped into an alternate universe or something," she said.

"Sit down," he said, smirking slightly. "I made you tea."

"I see," she said, sitting down at the table. "And breakfast."

"I told you I can cook."

Freddie sipped the tea. It tasted like peppermint and something else. As the soreness seeped from her muscles, she realized it was mixed with some sort of healing potion.

"You laced my tea?" she asked, looking over at him.

"I thought you might be a little...sore," he said, smirking at her.

"You-" she smiled and chuckled. "Thank you."

"For the tea?" he asked, still smirking.

"Among other things," she responded, sipping the tea.

There was a tap on the kitchen window and they both looked up, startled. There was a tawny owl at the window with a letter in its beak.

"Too soon for the Hogwarts supply list," Freddie said, standing up. "Must be for you."

"Get it," he said with a nod.

Freddie leaned over the sink and opened the window. She heard Snape's sharp intake of breath and glanced back at him.

"You are not wearing underwear," he said in a low voice and it was her turn to smirk before turning back to the owl and taking the letter from its beak.

"Hey, it's addressed to me," she observed, closing the window as the owl flew away.

"What is it?" Snape asked, taking the pan off the stove burner.

Freddie opened the letter and scanned it quickly.

"Some photographer wants to take my picture for _Apothecary Now_ to go along with my recipe," she said, folding it up. "Tomorrow morning at Hogwarts. Apparently he's already spoken to Dumbledore."

"Hmm. I would've liked more than 24 hours notice," he said, sounding annoyed.

"I could write him back. Postpone," she offered.

"No, it's fine," he said dismissively. "We will make it work."

Freddie put the envelope on the table and turned to see he had crossed the kitchen and was standing quite close to her. He put his hands on the table on either side of her, effectively pinning her in place. She looked up at him, at his dark eyes, and swallowed heavily.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked, though she was pretty sure she already knew the answer.

"Breakfast," he growled in a low voice.

"I don't think breakfast is what's on your mind."

"No," he said and stepped back, clearing his throat. "But you should eat. Sit down."

Freddie sat, because he told her to, but she didn't want food. She wanted to know what he was thinking, if it was the same thing she was thinking. He put a plate of eggs and bacon down in front of her, then sat down across from her with his own plate.

His eyes were on her as they both ate and Freddie couldn't fight the blush that crept across her face. She nibbled her bacon and sipped her tea.

"Why are you blushing, Winifred?"

"Wh- I'm not," she protested, feeling her face grow warmer.

"Don't _lie _to me."

"I- the way you're looking at me," she admitted. "Like you've seen me naked."

"Ah but I have," he said, smirking. "Twice now in fact."

"When you pulled me from the bathtub? I thought you didn't notice?"

"While I _was _focused on saving your life...it is an image that will forever be ingrained in my memory," he said, picking up his teacup. "Speaking of memory... I think it prudent, for both our sake, that I teach you Occlumency."

"Another lesson? I can't wait," she said, smiling.

"Ah but you will. Finish your breakfast."

Snape stood and took his empty plate and cup to the sink. Freddie wolfed down the rest of her eggs. She finished off her tea and started to stand. Snape was on her in a second, grabbing her arms and pushing her face down over the table.

"_I _cannot wait," he whispered, leaning over her to talk in her ear.

"Then don't," she grunted, and a shiver of excitement went through her as he grabbed her nightgown and pulled it up. She heard him undo his pants and then he was inside of her.

She was more than ready for him, already wet from the anticipation. He growled softly as he began to thrust into her. The force of his thrusts shook the wooden table so hard her empty plate fell to the floor and she heard it shatter.

"Please," she panted as she felt her orgasm building rapidly. "Please, can I-?"

"No," he growled, grabbing her by the hair. He wrapped her hair around his fist and pulled hard. She let out a yelp and felt his cock twitch inside of her. "Now," he said, his voice sounding strained. "You may cum...now."

Freddie let go and so did he, forcing himself into her deeply with one last thrust as he came.

He released her and stood up, pulling her gown back down. Freddie clutched the table for support as she straightened up, her legs trembling.

"I could get used to that," she chuckled weakly.

He smirked and pulled something from his pocket. He handed her a small vial.

"What's this?" she asked.

"A contraceptive. Drink it," he ordered.

"Oo. Good call," she said, quickly downing the potion.

"From now on I expect you to brew your own," he said. "Now, go get dressed. We have less than 24 hours for me to teach you Occlumency."

**Author's Note: So, after my last update I got a couple of not-so-positive reviews that was extremely disheartening to me and I wasn't sure I was going to update again. I've already written too far ahead for me to change things now, but if I am losing readers I may end up taking a break from this fic for a while and work on something else. **

**Yes, Freddie and Severus are having a 'physical relationship' per his words but do y'all really think he's not hiding his true feelings for her? He's a complicated man. And of course he still has feelings for Lily and I'm not trying to disrespect his love for her or to go too far from canon which means I have a lot of figuring out to do before the end of this story. I still have a ways to go, of course. I mean, what would y'all prefer? They end up together or I stay canon? **


	75. Chapter 75

**Author's Note: Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews! I cannot put into words how grateful I am to have your words of encouragement, how much they help. Thank you!**

Freddie took a quick shower and got dressed. This time she _did _put on her black lace panties and matching bra. She thought about going downstairs in just that, then thought better of it. She knew it was important she learn Occlumency before tomorrow. What if they ran into Dumbledore when she went to have her picture taken? She could only imagine the repercussions if Dumbledore figured out the change in the their relationship.

_He'd be fired and I'd probably be expelled, _she thought as she pulled on a pair of shorts. She found a simple black t-shirt and put it on. _Nothing too provocative, _she thought with a smile.

She went downstairs but Snape wasn't in the sitting room. She looked into the kitchen. He wasn't there either but the hidden passage to the cellar was open. She noticed the broken plate was still on the floor from his rather vigorous taking of her on the table.

"_Reparo_," she said, giving her wand a quick flick. The plate flew back together on the table. She smiled briefly then headed downstairs.

"What took you so long?" Snape asked.

He was standing in the middle of the room, waiting on her.

"I had to get cleaned up," she said. "Thanks to you. We're learning Occlumency down here?"

"You are learning, I am teaching. I thought this prudent. I once promised I would help you learn to control your magic, your emotions. The only way I could think of was Occlumency. At the time, I did not want to invade your mind, but now it is a necessity. It is possible I will see things you do not wish for me to see and in doing so you may inadvertently use your magic against me. I'd rather my books not be destroyed in the process, so I deemed it necessary for your lesson to take place here."

"Okay, so, what do I do?" she asked. She was a little nervous, but she wasn't sure what memories she had that she wouldn't want him to see.

"In the few weeks you were at your uncle's house, did you have any... outbursts?" he asked slowly.

Her mind immediately went to when she found the statue she'd made of Heather being eaten by spiders. She recalled the shame she'd felt before she'd broken it, and then the embarrassment she felt when she lost control.

"Ah, something you don't want me to see, Winifred?" he asked, raising his wand. "I can tell by your face. That's actually even better. I will be extracting that memory from your mind while you attempt to stop me."

"How?"

"Keep your mind clear. Think of nothing. Feel nothing."

"That's not as easy as you make it sound," she said.

"You will learn. _Legilimens._"

Freddie felt a sharp pain in her head as Snape entered her mind. He brought up the memory of her standing in her uncle's sitting room, holding the statue.

_Blank, think blank, _she told herself, picturing a blank white wall. She could see it clearly for a moment then Snape pushed harder, dredging up the memory again. The statue exploded in her hands and Freddie felt anger, shame.

_No, no, _she thought. _Blank wall. _

But it was like he followed the anger upstream into more memories, rifling through them and selecting one she tried to block.

_She was in the kitchen at Gray Manor, working on her Invisibility Antidote. She thought her uncle was at work so she had Daniel's record player on the counter. She was listening to the Eagles, feeling pensive and sad, thinking about Daniel, when all of a sudden her uncle burst into the kitchen. _

_ "What is that rubbish you're listening?" he demanded, startling her. "Is that Muggle music? Answer me, girl!"_

_ He grabbed her throat, pinning her against the wall. _

_ "Y-yes," she managed and he dropped her. _

_ "No niece of mine is going to listen to Muggle trash, and in my own house!" he snarled, picking up the record player. _

_ "No, don't!" she shouted in horror, but she couldn't stop him as he slammed it down on the tile floor, smashing it into bits. _

_ White hot rage rushed through her then out of her, knocking her potion over and knocking her uncle back, cracking his head on the iron stove. _

_ "Oh no," she said, feeling a rush of panic. "Anubis!"_

_ The house elf appeared with a crack and gasped as he took in the scene before him._

_ "Mistress Gray, again?" the elf asked, dismayed._

_ "Can you help me with a Memory Charm?" she asked, drawing her wand to clean up the mess. _

"Stop!" Freddie said aloud and Snape withdrew from her mind.

"Strong negative feelings are some of the most difficult to hide," he said. "As are strong positive feelings. Let's try again."

"Wait-"

"_Legilimens_."

He pulled up the memory again. She tried to ignore it, ignore the feelings.

_ Blank wall, blank wall, _she thought. _Don't think about feelings. No bad feelings, no good feelings. Don't think about-_

She inadvertently brought up the memory of Snape bending her over the table.

"If I am not distracted by that, then you should not be either," he said. "Again. _Legilimens_."

He tried to bring up the memory of her uncle's house but her mind was elsewhere. She was remembering looking up at him as she sucked his cock. How it felt the first time he entered her.

_That is exactly what you are _not _supposed to be thinking of, Winifred, _said Snape's voice in her head.

_That's weird. Hearing your voice in my mind. Get out of my head, _she thought.

_Make me, _he responded.

Freddie tried to shake off the annoyance and focused on a blank wall. He tore down her wall, revealing her uncle's kitchen, and she fought to keep it up. They struggled for a moment, then Snape withdrew.

"A decent effort," he commended her. "Do it again. _Le_-"

"Wait," she said. "Can I have a minute? This is making my head hurt."

He considered a moment, then inclined his head. He pulled out the stool near the workstation and sat down.

"Mind games," she said, rubbing her eyes.

"Mind games are my specialty," he said, a twisted smile on his lips.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"I can think of _far _more enjoyable ways to torture you, Winifred, however this you must learn and learn quickly."

As she imagined the 'enjoyable ways' he could be torturing her, he entered her mind again. She was imagining being tied to the kitchen table, her arms and legs restrained while he fucked her.

_I like the way you think, _said his voice in her head. _But focus. Master this, quickly, and I will reward you._

Which of course made it all the more difficult for her to focus.

#

They spent the next few hours, mentally fighting back and forth. She managed to throw him off a few times but the longer it went on the weaker she got. He started nit-picking at her last memory of Daniel and she found it was the hardest one to fight him off of, not when she wanted to look for clues. Nevermind the fact that she'd reviewed it a million times in her mind.

"That's enough, Winifred," Snape said, withdrawing from her mind one last time.

"Wait, what? I can do it," she said, even though her head hurt.

"No. You need a break. Go upstairs, take a nap, clear your head."

"No, I'm fine. Come on, let's go again. You said it yourself, we don't have a lot of time."

"Don't argue with me," he said warningly. "You did not get a lot of sleep last night."

"That's not my fault," she protested though she couldn't help but smile.

"Go take a nap. Relax for a little while. We will resume our lesson later."

"Fine," she sighed, then looked up at him with a sly smirk. "You know, you didn't sleep much either. Maybe you should come take a nap with me?"

"Nice try. I told you – you get nothing from me until you master Occlumency."

"Then why can't I stay and keep working on it?"

"Nap," he said. "Go. Now."

She let out a frustrated growl but obeyed. She stomped upstairs out of the cellar and headed up to her room. She left the door open, in case he changed his mind. She shimmied out of her shorts and lay down.

She was overwhelmed by his scent the moment she lay down. Her pillow, sheets, everything smelled like him. She breathed deeply and smiled as she relaxed.

_Clear your mind, _she told herself. _Blank wall. If I have to be up here 'relaxing' the least I can do is practice, without him bombarding my brain. So focus...blank wall, blank mind..._

Freddie woke a little over an hour later, to find Snape standing in her room, watching her. She sat up, stretching.

"Are you watching me sleep?" she asked, sliding her legs out from under the blanket. His eyes traveled up her long pale legs to her black lace underwear.

"I was waiting for you to wake up," he said.

"Still kind of creepy," she teased. "Unnerving."

"You've rested enough. Let's get back to work."

"Alright," she said, getting up and walking towards the door.

"Pants, Miss Gray."

"Oh sorry – wouldn't want to distract you," she teased, grabbing her shorts and pulling them on.

"It would take a lot more than the sight of you pants-less to break my concentration," he replied. "Although I must admit the bruises on your neck are particularly enticing." He approached her and lifted his hand to touch her neck, touch the bruises delicately with his fingertips. "Regardless, I am a master of concentration, a master of Occlumency."

"Master of many things," she said with a grin.

"Master of you," he growled and smacked her butt lightly. "Get downstairs."

"Yes sir," she giggled and hurried out of her room.


	76. Chapter 76

**Authors Note: Thanks for your patience everyone, I know I havent been updating as frequently as I once was but i have been struggling with writing recently and also trying to find a full time job now that my mom is officially Cancer-free. 😊 I wish writing fanfiction paid the bills tho! Anyway since yall have been patient and supportive, I have two chapters to upload tonight. Hope you enjoy! **

#

Snape followed her downstairs into the cellar. There was a sandwich on a plate sitting on the workstation.

"Eat that," he told her.

"I'm not hungry."

"Eat it anyway," he said.

"Fine," she said, rolling her eyes and sitting down on the stool.

She was halfway done with the ham sandwich when she felt him enter her mind.

_What are you doing? _She thought as he began to rifle through her memories of Daniel again.

_Teaching_, responded his voice in her head.

He found a memory of her and Daniel flying around the grounds as _Witchy Woman _blared from the record player. A range of emotions rushed through her – the happiness she'd felt at the time, then sadness, then anger that he was making her relive it.

_Focus. Blank. No emotion, _she told herself, picturing a blank wall and focusing on chewing her sandwich. Snape tried to bring the memory back up but couldn't.

"Good," he said aloud, withdrawing from her mind. "Again. _Legilimens._"

He rifled through her memories so quickly it made her dizzy. She stopped chewing, trying to figure out what he was looking for. He settled on her memory of her very first potions class.

She smiled at the memory, remembering how excited she was, how she'd hung on his every word.

_I made quite the impression it seems, _said Snape's voice in her head, sounding amused.

She tried to block him out but he was back rifling through her memories. Glimpses of her in class, in the Common Room, in the Great Hall. He narrowed in on a memory of her and Daniel, sitting in Potions class during their third year. She quickly tried to block him, but her embarrassment only made the memory easier for him to access.

_"You keep blushing every time Snape walks by," Daniel whispered teasingly._

_ "I do not! Shut up," she hissed at him._

_ "You're in looove with him," he said, making smooching sounds. _

_ "I'm gonna kill you, shut up," Freddie said, picking up a slug and throwing it at him. It hit him smack in the face. _

_ "5 points from Slytherin, Miss Gray," Snape said. "For wasting potion ingredients."_

_ Freddie felt her face flush and she gave Daniel an evil look as she bent down to pick up the slug. _

"You liked me at 13?" Snape asked, withdrawing from her mind.

"I liked you the moment I met you," she replied.

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"I had a – a crush on you, yes," she admitted, feeling her face grow warm. "So what?"

He crossed his arms, looking visibly uncomfortable.

"At 13?" he said.

"Uh, yeah. You're brilliant. So what? It can't be the first time a student got a crush on you," she said with a shrug.

He didn't say anything but raised one eyebrow at her. She took that to mean 'no'.

"Seriously?" she asked.

"Seriously," he repeated. "I pride myself on being the most unfriendly, unapproachable of teachers."

"Well you are," she snorted. "But you're also the most brilliant, the most intriguing, the most..."

She broke off, feeling her face flush again.

"The most what?" he asked, approaching her where she sat on the stool.

"Nothing," she said, shaking her head.

He towered over her, a smirk playing on his lips.

"The most what, Winifred?"

"Scary," she said, swallowing.

"That's not what you were going to say."

"If you're already in my head, why do you want me to answer?"

"Because I like making you nervous," he said, his smirk widening. "The most what?"

"Uh, a-attractive," she said finally.

He chuckled and lowered his head to kiss her but stopped at the last minute.

"What's wrong?" she asked as he took a step back.

"You were 13," he said, shaking his head. "I'm looking at you but all I see is..."

"I'm not 13 anymore, I'm an adult," she argued. "A consenting adult."

"Hmm," he said with a hungry look in his eyes, then he quickly looked away. "Why don't you work on a potion or something. We will revisit Occlumency later. You are doing well with it so far."

She watched him turn away and start up the stairs.

"Seriously?" she asked.

"I will return shortly," he assured her.


	77. Chapter 77

**A/N: Posting two chapters tonight so don't skip 76! **

Freddie sat there for a few minutes, cursing herself for letting him see that memory.

_ What if he changes his mind now? What if he doesn't want to continue our 'physical relationship' now because what? He knows I had a crush on him at 13? And for all the years following, obviously. What if he changes his mind?_

She bit her lip anxiously then decided to do what he said and brew a potion. At least it would keep her mind busy while he figured out whatever he was dealing with.

She headed upstairs and got the new Potions book she'd bought in Diagon Alley. She'd seen a recipe for a new contraceptive potion that only had to be taken once a month. She didn't see Snape anywhere and his bedroom door was shut. She rolled her eyes and headed back down to the cellar to get started.

An hour passed and Freddie had her Nirvana vinyl blaring while she worked on her potion. It was a simple enough brew so she was mostly dancing around the cellar, singing the few parts of the songs she'd learned yesterday.

"What is that racket?" Snape said as he came down the stairs.

"It's not racket, it's music. An American band called Nirvana."

"_That _is not music," he said, walking over to the record player and turning it off.

"Hmph," she said, crossing her arms and glaring at him from beside her cauldron. "So...have you made a decision?"

"A decision?" he repeated, walking over to the workstation and looking at the recipe in the book.

"Yeah. You seemed all freaked out and flighty so I thought, maybe, you wouldn't want to...do this anymore?" she asked, biting her lip.

"Flighty?" he said, turning to look at her with a smirk.

"Yeah, ya know – squirrelly."

"I'm squirrelly?" he asked, walking towards her.

"Definitely," she said, grinning as he approached her.

He grabbed her swiftly and pulled her to him, kissing her deeply.

"Does that answer your question?" he asked in a low voice.

"Yeah," she said on exhale, smiling up at him.

"Good. I'm not squirrelly," he said.

"Well actually-"

He silenced her with another kiss. He deepened the kiss and picked her up, carrying her over to the workstation.

"Ah, m-my potion," she said, breaking the kiss as he set her on the workstation. He let out a soft growl and whipped out his wand. He pointed it behind him and placed a stasis spell on the cauldron.

"Let's practice your Occlumency," he said, putting his hand on her thigh.

"N-now?" she said, gasping as he kissed her jawline.

"Mm-hm. _Legilimens_."

She felt him enter her mind at the same time he moved his hand farther up her thigh. He was in her mind but he wasn't rifling through her memories. He was exploring her feelings of lust and desire, seeing himself through her eyes. She closed her eyes, thinking that would help but it didn't. She tried to feel nothing, to focus on a blank wall. She almost could but then he put his mouth to her neck.

"I- I c-..." she stammered.

"You are not very good at this," he murmured against her neck, then flicked his tongue out to taste her skin. She whimpered and gasped as he nipped her throat.

"H-how...Y-you can't expect me to f-feel nothing w-when your hand is on my-" she gasped as he slipped his fingers beneath her shorts.

"I expect you to try," he growled and nipped her throat again. He moved his hands to her hips, hooking his thumbs under the waistband of her pants.

_Blank wall, blank wall, blank wall, _she thought determinedly, then lifted her butt off the table as he pulled her shorts off. She was doing a decent job of blocking her emotions until he put both hands on both of her thighs. He began to slide them up her thighs slowly, her mental wall failing with every inch.

_Try harder_, said his voice in her head.

"I can't," she whimpered aloud. He stilled his hands.

"I do not want to hear the word 'can't' in your vocabulary," he whispered in her ear, then nipped her earlobe. "Just keep trying."

Freddie took a deep breath and tried to clear her mind. She had her wall back up when he began to slide his hands up her thighs again.

_Blank, _she thought determinedly. _Blank mind, no emotion, blank – oh my god!_

His hands cupped her sex through her wet lace panties and she arched her hips off the table. He chuckled softly as he began to stroke her. She tried to focus but the fabric was providing a pleasant friction against her clit.

"Tsk tsk," he said teasingly, holding his palm flat against her sex. "It's hard, is it not? Maintaining your concentration under pressure."

"Something is hard," she said cheekily, leaning forward to touch him through his pants. He grew even harder at her touch, his cock straining in his pants.

"No touching without permission," he admonished. "I will have to punish you."

"What are you gonna do?" she taunted, giving him a squeeze. She knew she was asking for trouble but the thought also sort of thrilled her. He moved his hands to her hips again then quickly pulled her down off the table.

"Bend over," he growled, turning her around and pushing her down on the workstation. She heard him unbuckle his belt and a rush went through her. She spread her legs a little wider, expecting him to slide her panties off and enter her, to take her roughly against the table.

What she wasn't expecting was the harsh stinging crack of his leather belt against her ass.

"Youch!" she yelped in surprise.

"Clear your mind," he told her. She felt him enter her mind then felt the smack of the belt again. She inhaled sharply then exhaled slowly.

_Clear mind. No emotion, _she told herself. _No pain. No emotion. No-_

The belt struck her again.

She exhaled slowly, focusing on her blank wall. He struck her repeatedly but each time it got easier. Easier to focus on the blank wall. She no longer felt the pain, the anticipation or arousal. With each loud SMACK she grew calmer, her mind more blank.

"_Very _good, Winifred," he said, caressing her ass with one hand. "Very good. I am quite impressed."

"Thank you, sir," she said, her voice monotone.

She'd reached a strange feeling of nothingness, an emotional plateau. She kept her focus even as he pulled her panties down, sliding them off so he could touch the heated flesh lightly with his fingertips.

"Such a good girl," he murmured, sliding his hand between her thighs. He pushed his fingers through her slick folds and she gasped as he rubbed her clit. Suddenly all of her emotions and arousal and endorphins came rushing back all at once and she nearly orgasmed as he moved his hand down to enter her with two fingers.

"You took your punishment like a good girl. And your Occlumency is progressing quite nicely. Do you want your reward?"

"Yes please," she gasped as he angled his wrist to hit a sweet spot inside of her.

"Tell me what you want, little girl," he growled, leaning over her to whisper in her ear. He didn't stop the movement of his fingers inside of her. She was trying not to cum on his fingers as he nipped the back of her neck lightly. She almost forgot he had spoken to her until he bit her a little harder.

"Well?" he asked.

"Cock," she managed finally, then gasped as he withdrew his fingers.

"Fast or slow?" he asked as he unbuttoned his pants.

"Fast. I w-want to...to cum," she said, feeling herself flush.

"You may cum when you're ready," he said and she heard his pants drop. He put one hand on her hip and used the other to guide his cock between her legs. Then he was inside of her and just the feeling of him entering her was enough to push her over the edge. He gripped her waist with both hands, holding himself still, deep inside of her.

Right as her orgasm began to subside he started to thrust inside of her. It was rough and fast and she had to brace herself against the table. He moved his hands from her waist to her hands, covering them with hers, holding her in place.

"_Fuck_," she gasped as she felt her orgasm building rapidly again. "I need to – can I-?"

"Yes," he grunted.

She let herself go. Waves of pleasure rolled through her but he didn't stop his movements or even slow his rhythm. Her legs grew weak and nearly gave out on her but Snape scooped her up. She whimpered as he pulled his cock out but he quickly tuned her around, threw her down on the workstation, and he was inside her again. She let out a cry of surprise and delight as he grabbed her thighs, pulling her towards him as he thrust into her.

With each deep, hard thrust he hit a spot inside her that made her moan, gasp, or whimper.

"That's it, good girl," he panted, his fingers digging into her thighs. She moaned loudly and felt his cock twist inside her.

_I love it when he calls me that, _she thought.

_ I know you do, _said Snape's voice in her head. Freddie gasped aloud.

_You're in my head again?_

_ I never left, _he responded. _I am here, reading your every want, every desire. _

She moaned aloud, knowing he could feel her lust, her need. It took her a moment to realize she could feel his too. A primal desire to take her, to claim her, a feeling that definitely wasn't her own. She closed her eyes and followed the feeling back into his mind. She could see herself through his eyes, see herself laying on the workstation her head in a pile of chopped fluxweed. She could feel his desire to rip her shirt off but also his impatience – he didn't want to stop long enough to take her shirt off. He wanted to cum, wanted her to cum, wanted her to scream.

She opened her eyes to see him staring down at her, sweat dripping from his nose. She lifted herself up slightly, grabbing his shoulders and changing the angle of his thrust.

"Ah!" she said as he hit her g-spot. She wrapped her legs around him. "Yes, yes, yes. Please."

"Good girl, that's my good girl," he panted. "You are going to cum again, cum with me now."

"Yes sir," she whimpered and felt his cock swell inside of her as her walls began to spasm around him once more.

"Good girl," he said with a grunt, holding her tightly as he exploded inside her. "That's my good girl."

_I'm _his _good girl, _she thought dazedly as her orgasm subsided.

_Yes you are, _said his voice in her head then he withdrew and kissed her sweaty forehead.

"Very good," he said aloud as he stepped back from her.

She watched him pull up his boxers and pants but she still couldn't move. Her muscles were twitching from exertion so she stayed propped halfway up on the table watching as he put his belt back on.

"Did I break you, little girl?" he asked with some amusement, looking down at her half-naked form.

"No, not broken. Just...don't think I can stand up quite yet," she said, chuckling softly. "I don't think you can break someone with sex."

"Oh I do plan on trying," he said with a hungry look in his dark eyes.


	78. Chapter 78

#

Freddie woke up early the next morning to Snape kissing her lightly.

"Mm. S'early," she mumbled without opening her eyes. She didn't have to open her eyes to know it was early. She was tired, groggy, and her body felt exhausted. She was sore all over.

"It's time to wake up," he said, nudging her. "We have to go to Hogwarts this morning for your little photo thing."

"What time is it?" she groaned, covering her eyes as he turned on the electric lamp on her bedside table.

"6:30," he answered.

"Ugh," she groaned. "We don't have to be there until 10."

"Yes but you need to get cleaned up, eat breakfast."

"It's 6:30!"

"I always wake up at 6:30."

"Why?" she whined. "It's not a school day. Let me _sleep_. I'm exhausted."

"Hmm," he said and kissed her forehead.

She heard him walk away and she buried her head under the pillow, relieved he was letting her sleep.

He returned what felt like a split second later and nudged her.

"Wake up," he said, pulling the pillow off her head. She whined in protest and shut her eyes against the light. "Are you always this whiny in the morning?"

"Only when I don't _have _to wake up," she mumbled.

"Come on, sit up. Breakfast. Tea."

She opened her eyes to see he had placed a tray on the bedside table. He was fully dressed and freshly showered. His hair was still damp.

"You brought me breakfast in bed?" she asked, groaning softly as she struggled to sit up in bed. She felt sore and bruised all over. It hurt even to sit up. She assumed her butt was probably bruised from her spanking.

"Drink this, it'll help," Snape said, putting a teacup into her hands. She accepted it and took a long drink. She was pleased to find he'd put a potion in it again. Her soreness ebbed away as she drank the tea and she let out a sigh of relief.

Snape took the tray of food and sat down on the bed beside her with it in his lap. He had two plates piled with scrambled eggs, sausage, bacon and toast.

_Breakfast in bed with Severus...I could get used to this, _she thought, taking a piece of toast.

As she ate and drank the tea, Freddie began to feel more alert and energized. When she was finished eating Snape took the tray and stood up.

"Go shower," he told her.

"That your way of telling me I stink?" she chuckled.

"You do not stink. You smell like sex...and you have fluxweed in your hair," he said, leaning over to pick some plant material from her hair.

"Probably not the best look for having my picture taken for the magazine," she said, sliding out of bed.

She was naked and his eyes darkened as he looked her over hungrily. She smiled coyly up at him.

"You wanna come join me in the shower?" she asked. "I could use some help washing those hard to reach places. I'm still a little sore, ya know?"

"You drank Bland #27, you are fine," he said.

"You have a specific tea for pain?" she asked.

"Yes. Now go shower – _alone_. There'll be no more of..._this _until after we return from Hogwarts."

"_This_?" she said teasingly.

"I want you focused," he said. "Go. Get cleaned up."

Freddie smiled and crossed the hall to the bathroom. She left the door open halfway in case he changed his mind about joining her. She started the shower and checked her reflection in the mirror while she waited for the water to get warm.

The small bruises on her neck and breasts from the night before were still there, but yellowing slightly. Curious she turned around and looked at her butt. There were dark purple bruises in stripes across her ass from the belt. She winced slightly at the sight but she couldn't help but feel somewhat proud of herself for taking the beating so well. Not only that but she'd managed to clear her mind, to perfect her Occlumency while it was happening.

She practiced her Occlumency while she showered. She kept her mind blank as she shampooed and conditioned her hair. Blank as she lathered herself up with her eucalyptus-scented body wash. Blank as she-

_Damn, I need to shave my legs, _she thought as she rinsed the soap from her legs. _My wand is in my room and Severus is in there. Maybe he'll be downstairs when I get done showering. _

She finished rinsing herself off then turned the water off. She stepped out and grabbed a towel. She dried herself off quickly, wrapped the towel around herself, and hurried back across to her room.

She found Snape sitting on her bed waiting on her. He was looking at the vial of her blood on the bedside table.

"You can have that if you want," she said, walking over to pick up her wand so she could dry her hair. "You should have it."

"It's yours," he said, shaking his head. "You should keep it. You can use it for a potion someday. I placed a charm on it so it will keep, indefinitely."

"You should have it," she said, picking up the small vial and offering it to him. "I want you to have it."

"I will hold onto it for you," he said, accepting it with a nod. "Perhaps we shall use it together someday."

He put the vial in his pocket and watched as she used her wand to dry her hair. She wanted to use a spell to shave her legs but she felt embarrassed to do so with him watching. She knew it was silly to be embarrassed – he'd seen every inch of her naked already.

"Why are you blushing, Winifred?" he asked.

"What? I'm not," she said, quickly employing her Occlumency.

"You," he said and grabbed her, pulling her towards him. "You are becoming very skilled at Occlumency." He untucked the towel that was wrapped around her and let it fall to the floor. "I am impressed."

"I have a good teacher," she said as he put his hands on her hips.

"Mm. I will find out what you are hiding from me, Miss Gray," he growled softly. "I _can _torture it out of you."

A shiver of excitement went through her and she grinned.

"Right now?" she asked hopefully.

"After," he said, trailing his fingers down her hips slowly before releasing her. "You should not sound so excited about being tortured."

"As long as you are the one doing the torturing."

"Mm. You are a strange girl," he said. "You should get dressed."

"Are you going to sit there and watch me?" she asked, walking over to the dresser.

"I think I will," he said, leaning back against her headboard, crossing his legs.

"And I'm the strange one," she said teasingly. "...What should I wear?"

"You could go like that," he said with a smirk.

"I'm serious," she said, chucking a pair of rolled up socks at him.

"It does not matter what you wear," he said, catching the socks in mid air and throwing them back to her.

"But it does matter," she insisted. "It's my face in _Apothecary Now_. People are gonna see it, Potioneers all over the world are going to see it. My face with our potion."

"You do not have to take the picture if you do not want to, if you are worried about it."

"I'm not worried, I'm excited! I just have to figure out what to wear. It has to be perfect."

Snape sighed and stood up from her bed.

"Watching you get dressed is not nearly as interesting as I thought," he said, walking towards the door. "I'll be downstairs."

"You're no help at all," she called after him lightly.

She smiled to herself as she went through her dresser drawers. She thought about slacks and a nice top, even considered wearing her school robes. Finally she made a decision, settling on the black dress with the slit up the side that she'd worn on her birthday.

She lay the dress out on her bed and used her wand to iron out the wrinkled. She glanced towards the door then quickly performed the spell to remove the hair from her legs.

"Silly," she said aloud to herself.

_It's not like he cares. He's a man, I'm a woman, he knows I shave my legs. _

Still she hoped he would forget about torturing the reason behind her blush out of her.

#

Freddie put on a pair of red satin panties with her black bra. The panties had never been her favorite, they weren't exactly comfortable, but they were sexy and she knew Snape would most likely be taking the dress – and the panties – off of her, hopefully the second they got home.

She put the dress on, finding that it still fit perfectly. She put on her boots, then her cobra earrings. She dabbed her honeysuckle perfume on her wrists and neck. She fluffed her hair a bit then headed downstairs.

She found Snape sitting in the armchair, waiting for her. His eyes roamed over her body in the dress and he smiled slightly.

"I have something for you," he said, motioning her to him.

"Oh?" she asked, hoping that he was going to rip her dress off and fuck her senseless.

"You have a dirty mind, Miss Gray," he said, smirking widely and she blushed.

"Are you in my head? I didn't even feel you enter," she said as he stood up.

"Penetration gets smoother with time."

She flushed harder and felt herself grow wet at his words. He lowered his mouth to her ear.

"I know that you are wet right now," he whispered in her ear, then breathed in the scent of her skin. "Honeysuckle."

"Y-yeah, I use honeysuckle essence as a perfume," she said, trying to employ her Occlumency to get him out of her head. It was difficult because she was painfully aroused but she managed.

"I know," he said softly.

He took a step back and pulled a jar from his pocket. Bruise Cream.

"I need to put this on your neck," he said, unscrewing the cap. "And your chest before we go anywhere."

"Okay," she said, holding her hair out of the way as he began to spread the salve on her neck. "You know I like it when you play Healer with me."

"And I like it that I am the one who caused _these_," he said, caressing one of the hickeys with his thumb.

"Mm I like that, too," she said, tilting her head back so he had better access to her neck. He put his mouth to her neck, his lips millimeters from her skin. She thought he would kiss her but he didn't. He let out a soft growl before pulling away. She sighed softly.

"You know," she said slowly. "I have some pretty wicked bruises on my...bottom if you want to look at those."

"Your 'bottom'?" he teased.

"Yeah, do you want to put some of the Bruise Cream on them?"

"No, little girl, I think not. Considering no one but I will be seeing that particular part of you," he said, tucking her hair behind her ear. "Those are _my _bruises."

A shiver went through her and she clenched her thighs together. He took a step back, chuckling softly.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked.

"I dunno, I might need to change my panties," she said with a grin. "Especially if you're going to keep doing that."

"I am not doing anything."

"Right," she said. "Yeah, I guess I'm ready."

"Okay – rules. I have rules for you."

"I'm listening."

"No touching on Hogwarts grounds."

"I know not to touch without permission."

"That goes for both of us. No touching. No...flirting. No batting your eyelashes at me."

"Wh- I don't do that!" she said. "I'm not some ditsy blonde girl."

"No, you are not ditsy," he agreed. "Continuing...you will keep your mind guarded and be alert around other people, understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Repeat them back to me."

"No touching, no flirting, no trying to seduce you and keep my guard up."

"Very good," he praised. "Let's go."

They Apparated together just outside he Hogwarts gate. Snape immediately released her hand and opened the gate.

"Remember the rules," he reminded her. "If we are lucky we will not run into anyone."

"Yes sir," she said obediently. "We're early, aren't we?"

"Yes. I thought we could brew your antidote together, give them something to take your picture with," he said as they started across the grounds.

"That's a great idea," she said. "Do you have the recipe?"

"I have a copy, yes. I'm surprised you have not memorized it," he said with a small smirk.

"Well I've been a little busy the last couple of days," she said, purposefully not looking at him so he wouldn't think she was flirting. "Besides, most of the potions I have memorized are ones for medical use. Ones I'll be brewing when I start work at St Mungos."

He nodded silently. Freddie bit her lip slightly.

_ This time next year I'll be working at St Mungos, _she realized. _After I graduate...will I have to move out? Of course I will. It's foolish to think he'd want me to stay, that he'd ask me to stay. Even with this...relationship. It's only physical, just fulfilling physical needs, that's what he said. And as much as I'm enjoying it, and he's enjoying it...it can't last forever, can it?_

She swallowed heavily as they entered the castle.

_It's not time to worry about that now, _she told herself, throwing up her mental shield as they headed down into the dungeons. _Just enjoy it while it lasts. _

"It's quiet around here with no students," she observed as she followed him down the stone staircase.

"It is. My favorite time of year," he drawled.

She chuckled softly.

"How many teachers are here during the summer?" she asked curiously.

"It varies," he replied. "Some of them live here – Dumbledore, Trelawney. Filch, although he's not a teacher. Hagrid, too. Minerva is frequently around, though I believe she has a house in Bristol. Others float in and out, more often the closer it gets to September 1st."

"We're not going to your office?" she asked as he stopped outside the Potions classroom and opened the door.

"No, we are going to brew in here. I am not having a photographer in my private lab."

"Ah, I understand."

"Good. Gather your ingredients. I have a copy of your recipe in my office. I will return momentarily."

Freddie watched him go then went to the supply cupboard to get what she needed. She tried to remember everything, all of the ingredients, but she'd had so many versions of the potion she couldn't remember everything exactly. So she gathered what she could and placed them on her desk, the place where she usually sat in class.

When she had everything ready, she sat on top of her desk and waited for Snape. A few minutes passed and he hadn't returned. She got up and walked around the classroom. She walked up to his desk and sat down in his chair.

There were no papers on his desk, none of the usual essays to grade. She put her feet up on his desk, crossing her legs. Her dress fell to the side, revealing her smooth pale legs up to the knee.

She let her imagination run away while she waited for him. She imagined him taking her forcefully on his desk. Or sitting on his cock while he sat in his chair. She knew she wasn't supposed to be thinking that sort of thing but she was alone. And it was hardly the first time she'd fantasized in the classroom...the difference now was she knew what it was _really _like, making her fantasies all the more...vivid.

"Miss Gray," Snape said sternly as he entered the classroom and she quickly threw up her mental shield. "...Get your feet off of my desk."

"Sorry sir," she said obediently.

She got up and walked over to her desk where he was waiting.

"Here's a copy of your recipe," he said. "Let's get started."


	79. Chapter 79

#

At ten minutes til 10 o'clock they had finished the Invisibility Antidote. Freddie placed a stasis spell on the cauldron and they left the classroom to go meet the photographer at the gate. They crossed the grounds together, neither of them speaking. Freddie was focused on her blank wall, focused on _not _thinking about all of the things she wanted to think about.

"I hope this doesn't take long," Snape muttered under his breath.

Freddie glanced up at him with a grin. He looked down at her then quickly looked away.

"Don't look at me like that," he hissed.

"Like what?" she asked innocently.

"Miss Gray," he said, clearing his throat as they approached the gate.

"Sorry Professor."

There was a middle-aged balding man waiting just outside the gate. He was dressed in light blue robes, had a camera hanging around his neck, and a brown satchel over one shoulder.

"Good morning!" he said brightly. "I'm David Creevey. And you must be Winifred!"

"Call me Freddie, please," she said, shaking his hand.

"Freddie Gray. How delightful!" he said enthusiastically. "And Professor Snape, I assume."

"Yes," he said with a curt nod, not offering his hand to shake.

"We, um, brewed the Invisibility Antidote in the Potions classroom," Freddie said. "If you want to take my picture there?"

"That sounds wonderful. Lead the way," Creevey said and they started off back across the grounds. "I have to say, it's absolutely remarkable, someone of your age developing an antidote to such a complex potion, and a new potion at that. Absolutely remarkable."

"Thank you," she said. "I had help of course. Professor Snape and I began working on the antidote together before the end of last semester. I'm his apprentice."

"_Fascinating. _But the final brew was your own concoction."

"Well yes, but I never would have gotten there on my own, not without all the work Professor Snape and I put in together."

"You would have," Snape said quietly, and they both looked up at him. He cleared his throat before containing. "Miss Gray is a brilliant, talented student. She has shown remarkable skill in Potions. In fact she will be competing in the upcoming Wizarding Schools Potions Championship this year."

"Oh fantastic! That's fantastic!" Creevey said, clapping his hands together. "Well I do hope if you win they'll send me out to take your picture. No doubt they'll do a write up in the _Prophet _if you win – I do photos for them as well."

"_When _she wins," Snape said firmly. "I am confident in my apprentice's skill."

Freddie beamed but was careful not to look at him. She kept her mind clear as they headed down the staircase into the dungeon. When they reached the classroom Freddie and Creevey followed Snape inside.

"So what should I do?" Freddie asked walking over to her desk.

"Just stand there a moment while I get the lighting right," Creevey said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a tripod. He set up his camera and took a few test shots while Freddie stood there, feeling awkward. She glanced at Snape who was sitting at his desk, looking bored by the whole ordeal.

"There we are," Creevey said finally. "I love your dress by the way, you look absolutely stunning!"

"Thank you," Freddie said, not missing the look of annoyance that crossed Snape's face briefly. _Is he jealous? _She wondered. "So what should I go, just stand here?"

"Hmm, maybe give it a bit of a stir?" Creevey suggested, looking through the lens of his camera.

"It will alter the potion if I stir it," she said, frowning. "It may make it unusable."

"That doesn't matter, we just need a good photo," he said reassuringly.

Freddie made a face. She didn't like the idea of wasting a potion for a photo op. She glanced at Snape who shrugged indifferently. She sighed and picked up the ladle and began to stir the potion slowly.

"Come on now, Freddie, give me a smile," Creevey encouraged.

She smiled but it felt forced, more like a grimace. The potion was changing as she stirred it and smoke began to come off in spirals.

"Hmm," Creevey said, snapping a few pictures. "Professor Snape why don't you come over here, get in the picture?"

"What?" he snapped irritably.

"Come get in the picture. She's your apprentice and like she said, she couldn't have done it without you," Creevey said. "Come on."

"Ridiculous," he muttered, but he pushed back from his desk and got up. He walked over and stood beside Freddie. She smirked, not looking at him, keeping her gaze on the flashbulb of the camera as Creevey took their picture.

_Whatever gets him out of here faster, _said Snape's voice in her head.

She smirked wider and Snape placed his hand on her shoulder. Creevey snapped a few more pictures then lowered his camera.

"Excellent," he said, clapping his hands together. "Really excellent. I'm sure these will turn out wonderful."

"Great," Freddie said, vanishing the ruined potion in the cauldron as Creevey packed up his equipment.

"We will walk you back to the gate, Mr Creevey," Snape said.

"Thank you for everything and good luck with your contest," Creevey said, shaking Freddie's hand as they reached the Gate.

"Thank you," she said with a smile.

"I'll be sure you get an advanced copy of your issue," he said. "Have a good day."

"You too. Thanks."

Creevey Disapparated with a pop and Freddie let out a breath she felt like she'd been holding all morning. It was over and they hadn't run into Dumbledore or any other teachers. She glanced back at the castle then at Snape.

"Are you ready to go?" she asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"Well I do have work to do, schedules to make," he said slowly, looking back at the castle. Then he smiled, grabbed her arm, and Disapparated.


	80. Chapter 80

They appeared in the sitting room and he immediately pulled her to him and kissed her deeply. He put his arms around her, dragging his hands across the exposed skin of her back.

"I like this dress," he said against her mouth, then kissed her again, sucking her bottom lip and nipping it playfully.

"Mm. I wore it on my birthday," she said, then gasped as he trailed kisses along her jaw.

"I remember," he murmured, kissing his way to her ear then inhaling deeply. "You smell good."

She chuckled softly and squirmed as he traced her ear with his lips.

"That tickles," she said, trying to pull away but he held her tightly. He repeated the action then nipped her earlobe.

"Mm," she said, pressing herself against him but still squirming. "Did you – did you think I was hot on my birthday? When you took me out to dinner?"

"Hmm...yes," he said and kissed her neck in a spot that made her toes curl. "It was very unexpected."

"What was?" she asked, gasping as he sucked the spot.

"Finding you attractive," he answered with his lips against her skin.

"Was that the first time you-"

"Shh," he said, moving to recapture her lips with his.

Freddie forgot her train of thought as he kissed her possessively. His hands roamed her back, down to her ass. He squeezed it, pulling her flush against him as he kissed her. She could feel his cock against her, straining against the fabric of his pants.

She grasped his hips, wanting to reach between them and free his cock but she didn't want to break the kiss to ask permission.

_Do it, _said his voice in her head.

_You're in my head, _she thought, surprised, but too pleased to have permission to touch to be mad.

_I'm always in your head, _he responded as she unbuttoned his pants. _I find mind games – ah!_

He severed the connection between them as she took his cock in her hands. He gasped into the kiss, then moved his hands up to bury them in her hair while he kissed her, sucking her tongue into his mouth.

He broke the kiss and pushed her down. She went to her knees willingly and quickly took him into her mouth. She sucked, taking him deep into her throat. He tightened his grip in her hair and took a staggering step backwards. His cock fell from her mouth and she looked up questioningly.

"I cannot- cannot stand while you do that," he said and took a few steps back to sit on the couch. "Come here."

She crawled to him and nestled herself between his legs. She looked up at him with a smile, then gave him a lick without breaking eye contact. He inhaled sharply then let out a soft growl as she put her lips over the head of his cock. She chuckled as she opened her mouth to take him deeper.

"Good girl," he said, stroking her head as she went farther down his shaft. She hummed pleasantly and felt his cock twitch at the sensation it created.

She continued slowly, licking and humming since he seemed to like it.

"Faster," he growled at her. She ignored him and he grabbed her head, forcing her to move how he wanted. She didn't mind and opened her mouth wider as he forced her up and down. She tasted his cum right before he pulled her off. She experienced a second of confusion before he exploded over her face. She quickly closed her eyes as she felt the warm liquid splatter across her face. He wiped the head of his cock against her lips and she licked it clean.

He let out a satisfied grunt and released her. She rocked back on her heels and blinked up at him. He looked unusually relaxed and he was smirking at her.

"They should have taken your picture like that," he said with a faint sneer.

"Hmm," she said, maneuvering herself back between his legs and looking up at him. "I'm sure Mr Creevey would have enjoyed that."

His eyes darkened and his face hardened slightly.

"He was leering at you," he said in a low voice.

"He said he liked my dress," she said.

"Not as much as I do," he said, pulling her up into his lap. "And I am the only one who gets to see what is underneath it."

He let out a soft growl and kissed her neck. He nipped and sucked along the skin of her throat, no doubt leaving new marks across her neck to replace the ones he'd healed earlier. She was impressed with how quickly he had learned all of the spots that would turn her into a quivering puddle of lust, spots she hadn't even known existed before him.

He pulled her dressed up, bunching it around her waist. He slipped his thumb beneath the waistband of her red panties, then pulled back to look at her.

"Do you want me to _fuck _you?" he whispered, teasing her by tugging on her panties.

"Yes," she said, panting slightly and grinding herself against his hardening cock.

"Yes what?"

"Yes please, yes sir, please."

"Tell me why you were blushing earlier."

"W-what?"

"Tell me why you were blushing earlier in your bedroom."

"W- I don't remember."

"You do remember," he said, holding her tightly as she made a half-hearted effort to pull away from him.

"It's stupid," she said, shaking her head. "Why do you want to know?"

"Because I do."

"_Why_?"

"Because it embarrasses you."

"And you like embarrassing me?"

"Tell me," he said, smacking her ass lightly.

"Umm..."

"Tell me. Or do you want a spanking?"

She hesitated, kind of wanting the spanking but also knowing it would hurt. He smacked her ass harder and she yelped. It hurt even more than she expected because of the bruises from yesterday.

"Tell me," he said. "If you want me to fuck you. You want me to fuck you, don't you? You want to cum?"

His voice was a sultry purr and she quivered slightly, clenching her thighs together.

"Y-yes sir," she said and he smacked her hard again. "Okay, okay. I'll tell you. I was embarrassed because...because I needed to shave my legs but you were watching."

He grinned at her and ran his hands along her smooth legs.

"I told you it was silly," she mumbled.

"How far up did you shave I wonder," he said, his hands trailing up the back of her thighs. "Stand up."

She groaned but climbed off his lap reluctantly.

"I told you what you wanted to know, you're supposed to fuck me," she said, pouting slightly.

"In due time," he said calmly. "I like seeing you pout."

She scowled and crossed her arms, causing him to smirk.

"Take off your pretty little dress," he said. "Slowly."

Freddie found her fingers were trembling as she reached for the straps on her dress. She wanted it now, wanted it fast and dirty and hard, and she didn't want to wait.

_Four years of waiting, a few more minutes of anticipation won't kill me, _she told herself as she slid the straps of her dress off her shoulders.

She forced herself to move slowly as she pulled the dress down, revealing her bra-clad breasts, then her stomach, then finally shimmied out of it the rest of the way, the fabric pooling around her feet. She looked to Snape to see him watching her with an intense gaze. She waited for him to tell her to take off her panties and bra but he didn't, he just looked at her.

"See anything you like, sir?" she purred, clasping her hands behind her back.

"Many things," he responded. He pulled out his wand and gave it a quick flick. Freddie felt a rush of cool air as her underwear vanished.

"Wh- hey!" she protested, feeling her face flush.

"Have you ever shaved the hair between your legs?"

"Uh...yeah, I have before," she said, blushing harder. "I wasn't sure if you would...I mean, the first time I wasn't exactly...expecting it and I didn't have time to...prepare or anything."

"Prepare?" he repeated with a smirk. "And how would you have prepared?"

"I, uh, would've shaved...everything," she said, avoiding his gaze.

"Do it now."

"R-right now?" she asked nervously.

His smirk grew wider.

"Yes," he said. "Do it now. I want to watch."

"Of course you do," she said with a sigh, then she had a thought. "Wait, I can't do it now. Not here. I don't have a mirror."

He picked up his wand and cast a charm which produced a reflective surface from the tip of his wand. Freddie jumped slightly at seeing her own naked reflection. Her pale frame, her breasts still covered by her bra. Her face shiny from the cum drying on her face.

_Let's just get it over with, _she thought, retrieving her wand from her dress. _He wants to watch me shave. Fine. Let him watch. I won't let it bother me. _

Freddie employed her Occlumency while she made quick work of the hair between her legs. She let herself feel nothing, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of embarrassing her...but she couldn't do anything about the blush on her cheeks.

"Your progress with Occlumency is quite impressive," he said as she finished. "Although I never intended for you to use it against me."

"Sorry sir," she said, even though she wasn't.

He chuckled softly and tossed his wand aside. He beckoned her closer and she approached him anxiously, wondering if she'd be punished for using Occlumency against him.

_I just want to be fucked, _she thought, clenching her thighs together, feeling her arousal trickle down her thighs. She felt even more bare and exposed than she had before.

"I think you've been tortured enough for now," he said, standing up. "Let's go upstairs."

**Author's Note: So I got a bit lazy here and didn't finish the sex scene (don't worry there are plenty more to come). I needed to skip ahead a bit to make progress on the story. **


	81. Chapter 81

July passed quickly and Snape spent every night in Freddie's bed. The morning her school supply list came he woke her up by kissing her. Freddie blinked her eyes open sleepily and smiled at him.

"Good morning," she said, sitting up in bed.

"An owl brought this for you," he said, sitting down beside her and handing her the envelope.

"My school supply list? I guess I'll have to go to Diagon Alley."

She had avoided Diagon Alley ever since her near run in with Geck and the others. She'd taken to exploring the nearby Muggle towns, getting groceries, even clothes from there. She only went to Diagon Alley to go to the Apothecary and she was always cautious and quick about it. She couldn't help but feel a little nervous about going for her school supplies, knowing that everyone else had gotten their letters today and would probably be there.

"Do you want to go with me to get my things?" she asked.

"I do not think that would be the best idea," he answered slowly. "We should not be seen together outside of the castle. The town will be crawling with students."

"Oh. That's true," she said and laid her head on his shoulder with a soft sigh.

"What's wrong?" he asked, nuzzling her hair then kissing the top of her head.

"Mm. Just...I've been avoiding Diagon Alley. The last time I went I sort of ran into Geck – well, almost ran into him. He chased me down an alley and I hid."

He was silent a moment and she felt him in her mind, dredging up the memory and reviewing it. She didn't try to fight him, just let him see it. She felt his anger and annoyance towards Geck at being called 'Professor Bastard', rage at hearing how he wanted to confront Freddie.

"You should owl one of your friends to go with you," he said, withdrawing from her mind.

"I don't think he would try anything in broad daylight, not with the street full of people. Besides," she said. "I'm not _scared _of Geck, I'm not scared of anyone – except maybe you sometimes." She looked up at him with a playful grin. "I can take Geck if I have to, I just...don't want to have to."

"I know," he said, putting his arm around her and giving her a light squeeze. "You used to be friends."

"Yeah," she said softly.

A sadness washed over her as she began to think about Daniel again. Wondering for the millionth time what could have happened to him. Wondering if he would ever turn up. If she would ever find out what happened to him.

"You could invite Miss Burke to accompany you," he said. "Or one of your classmates."

"I'll be fine," she said, snuggling into his embrace. "I'll just make a quick trip. No big deal."

"Hm. I need to go to the castle today and work on lesson plans," he said, kissing the top of her head again. "Maybe I could meet you for lunch at the Silver Serpent, say 12 o'clock?"

"Seriously? Yeah, okay," she said happily. "...I guess I should get up and get dressed, huh?"

"Unless you want to walk around the shops naked," he teased.

"I don't think you want me to do that," she said, smirking as she started to climb out of bed. He grabbed her arm and pulled her back into bed. He kissed her passionately, then released her.

"Now you can get dressed," he said.

Freddie chuckled and rolled out of bed. She went over to her dresser and put on a clear pair of black underwear and bra, then she pulled on a pair of very short blue jean shorts and a black t-shirt that had a skull and roses on it, both of which she'd gotten from a Muggle shop.

"Cute," Snape said as she turned around and pulled her hair up into a ponytail. He sat on the edge of the bed and she walked over to him.

"You think I'm cute?" she asked, smiling down at him. He grabbed her and pulled her down on the bed again, rolling on top of her to kiss her.

"Very cute," he said. "You have a cute forehead." He kissed her forehead. "Cute eyes." He kissed her eyelids. "And a very cute nose." He kissed her nose.

"My nose is cute?" she asked, smirking up at him.

"Yes," he said, kissing her nose again. "It's turned up on the end, like a rattlesnake."

"Like a rattlesnake?" she repeated, laughing.

"It is not nice to laugh when someone gives you a compliment," he growled, giving her breast a hard squeeze through her shirt.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly.

"I have to go, my little rattlesnake," he said, kissing her one final time on the lips then getting up. "I have work to do."

"Okay. I'll see you for lunch," she said and he gave her a quick nod before Disapparating.

#

Freddie appeared on the street outside of the bookstore. She'd decided that should be her first stop. She blinked in the sunlight, looking around the busy street at all the people. Students with their family, their friends.

She thought back to last summer. She'd traveled to Diagon Alley via floo powder alone from her uncle's house and met up with Daniel outside the Leaky Cauldron. They'd spent the day together, purchased their school things, wandered in and out of shops together, had pizza for lunch. She sighed softly and turned to go into the bookstore, thinking she'd never have a friend like him again.

The bookstore was unusually crowded, even considering the school supply list had been released today. Freddie was thinking about coming back later when she heard someone mention the word Animagus.

"It isn't easy learning to become an Animagus but it's not impossible," said a booming female voice. "It took me nearly 3 years but I detailed my adventure in my new novel _Addressing Animagi _in the hope of helping others achieve their dream of transformation."

Freddie weaved her way through the crowd curiously to see a tall, thin woman with short spiky gray hair holding up a book.

"With my autobiography – and a bit of hard work – you too can do this," said the woman and with a leap she transformed into a red-tailed hawk, clutching the book in her claws. She flew around the bookstore causing the crowd to clap and cheer. The hawk circled low over the heads of the crowd before returning to her seat and becoming human once more.

"If you'd like a signed copy of _Addressing Animagi, _gather round, get in line. I have a limited number of copies available," the witch said.

Intrigued, Freddie quickly got in line. She found herself behind two blonde witches who looked to be in their mid-twenties. They were talking animatedly to each other.

"She's _so _cool!" one of them said.

"I hope I can be some sort of bird – can you imagine? Flying everywhere without a broom."

"Spying on cute boys," the other whispered with a giggle.

"Who is she?" Freddie asked them curiously.

"Her name's Hawkins," said one of the women.

"Patrice Hawkins," added her friend. "She's awesome."

"Hawkins and her Animagus is a hawk? Wonder if that's really her name," Freddie said dubiously.

When Freddie found herself in front of Miss Hawkins, she paid for a copy of the book.

"And who am I making this out to?" Hawkins asked, an elaborate peacock quill in hand.

"Freddie Gray," she answered. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course!"

"Is there any way to know what your Animagus form will be? Like did you know that you'd be a hawk?"

"It's said that the animal you transform into reflects your personality," she answered. "There's no way to know for sure, but most people find their Animagus form takes the shape as their Patronus, if they can cast one."

"Ah. I haven't quite mastered that yet," she admitted. "I was trying for a while but I got distracted. It may be time to take it back up."

"Good luck," Hawkins said, handing her the signed book.

"Thank you," Freddie said with a nod.

She skirted her way back through the crowd. She left the bookstore, deciding he'd get the rest of her books later, when it had cleared out a bit. She checked her supply list and decided to go ahead to Potage's Cauldron Shop to get the copper cauldron she would need for 7th year.


	82. Chapter 82

#

Freddie kept her eyes open and remained alert as she went in and out the shops of Diagon Alley. She carried her copper cauldron into the stationary store so she could get more parchment, ink, and quills. She purchased a set of black eagle feather quills she found rather handsome. She got a few wells of black ink and one of red ink for when her fan club asked her to proofread their essays.

She got a few black journals, the kind she'd need for note keeping if she experimented with more potions. She was putting the journals in her cauldron to purchase them when another journal caught her eye. It looked to be bound in some sort of green and gold snakeskin. She touched the scales curiously and read the sign in front of it – _Password Protected Diary. _

_ It's pretty, _she thought. _But what would I use it for? I'm not exactly a diary sort of person...But I could write my letters to Daniel in it!_

She dropped the book into her cauldron and took her things to the counter to pay for them.

She left the stationary store and started up the street to the Apothecary. She'd decided to leave Flourish and Blotts for last, since it still looked crowded. She was almost to the Apothecary when she spotted a familiar crop of blonde hair and her heart dropped. It was Heather, walking with a few of her Gryffindor friends.

Freddie quickly ducked into the nearest shop, hoping they hadn't seen her. She'd rather face Geck than Heather. She held her breath, peeking out the window of the door as Heather and her friends got closer. She exhaled loudly and ducked down as they passed. She was started by a loud _hoot! _From behind her and she turned around to see a large snowy owl on a perch watching her with yellow eyes.

"Oh hello," she said at the owl, which hooted loudly at her.

Freddie looked around the small shop which was crammed full of cages containing various animals. She was peaking into a tank of brightly colored toads when a voice spoke.

"Can I help you find anything?"

She turned to see a man in brown robes had appeared behind the counter, a white rabbit in his arms.

"Oh, um, I was just-"

"Hiding?" the man offered with a kind smile. "You ran in here like someone was after you."

"Yeah. Sorry," she said sheepishly.

"It's okay. Feel free to look around while you hide," he said.

There was a loud pop and the rabbit in his arms turned into a black top hat. The hat jumped from his arms onto the counter, then turned back into a rabbit with another pop.

"Did you do that?" Freddie asked curiously, approaching the counter.

"No, that's Alakazam. He was seized by the Ministry of Magic from a wizard who was performing magic shows in front of Muggles. He had some sort of faulty charm placed on him and now he does that every few minutes," the man said. Alakazam hopped towards Freddie. She reached out to pet him and he turned into a hat again.

"You haven't been able to lift the charm?" she asked as the hat hopped away.

"Unfortunately, no. He's been here almost a year now. I keep hoping someone will come in and adopt him. He's one of my misfits."

"Misfits?" Freddie asked as the hat jumped onto the floor. She picked it up and put it back on the counter.

"Yeah, I have a few oddball animals. Some that've been here for years. I believe the right person will come for them eventually. I had an owl named Orbit who couldn't fly. He was here for 3 years before a kind old woman gave him a home."

Alakazam turned back into a rabbit and the salesman carried him over to a hutch of other rabbits and put him in.

"That orange fur ball in the window is Crookshanks," he said as he closed the hutch. "He's been here the longest. I'm sure his perfect owner will find him eventually."

Freddie walked over to the orange cat that was sleeping in the window. He opened one eye to look at her. She reached out to pet him but he let out a rumbling growl.

"Not very friendly, are you?" she scolded then wandered over to a large cage that was partially covered with a blanket. Inside were a dozen bats, hanging from the top of the cage, asleep.

"Do you have a pet?" the salesman asked her. "How about an owl? Everyone needs an owl."

"I've thought about it," she admitted. "But I haven't really got anyone to write to. Maybe once I finish school – I've only got a year left."

"Oh yeah? Well come back here when you're ready. My owls have more personality than the ones at the Owl Emporium. I'll help you find one that's perfect for you."

"Alright," Freddie agreed. "Is it okay if I look around here a bit?"

"Sure. Who are you hiding from anyway? You aren't in trouble are you?"

"It's a long story," Freddie said, wandering over to a cage filled with kittens.

"I understand. Take your time. If you want to open the cage to play with them, you can."

"Thanks!"

#

Freddie was sitting on the floor of Magical Menagerie with kittens crawling all over her when her watch beeped at 11:45. She put down the owl feather she was teasing a tabby kitten with and carefully got to her feet.

"I've gotta go, I'm supposed to meet someone for lunch," she said, putting the kittens back in their cage.

"Your boyfriend?" asked the salesman whose name she'd learned was Matt.

"That's another long story," Freddie chuckled as she retrieved the last kitten, a little Siamese boy, and put him in the cage. "Thanks for letting me hang out here."

"No problem. It's good for the animals to have someone to play with and it seems like it helped you too. Come back anytime."

"Thanks Matt."

Freddie peeked out the door before walking out onto the street. She carried her cauldron down the street to the turn off to Knockturn Alley. She stopped and dug out the new black cloak she'd gotten. She put it on and pulled the hood over her face before heading down Knockturn Alley. She was wearing Muggle clothes and she knew that, combined with being a young woman and alone, was a bad combination for Knockturn Alley. She pulled the cloak around herself as she walked down the dark street. She kept her wand out in one hand and toted her cauldron in the other.

She kept alert as she walked down the alley. She passed a few cloaked figures who gave her a wide berth when they saw her wand out. She was almost to the Silver Serpent when a hand closed on her shoulder.

She whirled around, striking out with her cauldron and wand. The figure let out a grunt and fell back from her stunning spell. That's when she saw it was Snape.

"Oh my God! I'm sorry!" she squeaked as he got to his feet. "You – you startled me. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," he said, rubbing his side where the cauldron had struck him. "Good to know you can defend yourself if need be."

"I'm really sorry."

"Do not be. I should not have surprised you. Are you hungry?"

"Starving," she said, following him towards the restaurant. He held the door open for her, then followed her inside.

"Did you get all of your school supplies?" he asked as they sat at their table in the corner.

"Not quite. I still have to go to the Apothecary and the bookstore."

"What have you been doing all morning?"

Freddie was interrupted by the waitress appearing next to their table.

"Good afternoon. Can I start you off with something to drink?"

"White wine, please," Freddie said.

"Scotch for me," Snape said.

"You're drinking scotch again?" Freddie asked with a slight smirk as the witch disappeared.

"Yes. I'm returning to work after this, no bad decisions to make," he said. "So, why haven't you finished your shopping?"

"Flourish and Blotts was crowded. There was a book signing, Patrice Hawkins."

"Never heard of her."

"She's an Animagus," she said, pulling the book out of her cauldron. "She wrote a book to help other people become Animagi."

"You want to be an animal?"

"I still can't believe you _don't_," she said. "Think about it. You can wander around unseen, listen in on conversations, spy on people."

"All of which can be accomplished with a Disillusionment Charm or Invisibility Potion."

"Ah you just don't get it," she said, shaking her head at him.

The witch returned with their drinks and took their order. They both ordered the steak and baked potato. Freddie sipped her wine and flipped through _Addressing Animagi _while they waited on their food.

"What sort of animal do you think I will be?" she asked.

"An annoying one," he said, drinking his scotch, his head propped on one arm, watching her read. "Maybe a mosquito."

"I'm serious," she laughed, smacking his arm. "...Can Animagi be that small? Like mosquito-sized?"

"It is possible."

"I don't think I'd like that. If I do all this work just to turn into some sort of bug? Ugh. I'll be pissed."

"Relax, Winifred, I am sure you will not be a bug," he said, smirking as he took a drink of scotch.

"A bird would be cool – the writer, Patrice Hawkins, she's a red-tailed hawk. That would be cool. A falcon or an owl."

"Maybe a snake," he said.

"A rattlesnake?" she asked playfully, wrinkling her nose.

"Perhaps," he said, smiling.

"Hawkins said that my Animagus form would match whatever form my Patronus takes," she said thoughtfully, sipping her wine.

"Have you managed to produce a corporeal Patronus?"

"Not yet. I was – I got a little distracted," she admitted.

"Hm. You cannot let 'this' distract you from your work," he said seriously. "Is that going to be a problem when school resumes?"

"What? No. No, of course not," she said, feeling her cheeks grow warm. "No."

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Yes! I learned Occlumency and I'll learn this, too. In fact, I'll be I can master the Patronus Charm by the end of the week," she said smugly. "Don't flatter yourself by thinking you can affect my work. When I put my mind to something-"

"-you get it," he finished. "What do you want to bet?"

"What?"

"You said you bet you can master the Patronus charm within a week. Generally a bet comes with a wager."

"Oh. Hmm... I'm not sure," she said, sipping her wine and thinking about it for a few minutes. "How about one night-" she lowered her voice. "-where _I'm _in control of...things?"

"And what do I get if you lose?" he asked, a smile playing on his lips.

"Well you already have everything. Complete control of me, whenever you want it," she said quietly. "What do you want if I lose? Which, I'm not going to lose, of course."

"Of course," he said, taking another long drink of scotch. He was still drinking when she felt him enter her mind.

"What-?" she began.

_My wager is one night with you at my mercy, where I do whatever I want and you – you do not get to cum, _said his voice in her head.

She could feel his desire, his primal urge inside her head, and it took her breath away. He smirked across the table at her as he withdrew from her mind. She picked up her wine glass in shaky hands and took a long sip.

"Deal," she said on exhale. "But, I'm going to win."

"We will see," he said lightly as the waitress returned with their steaks.


	83. Chapter 83

When they finished eating, Snape paid for their meal and followed Freddie outside.

"I have to get back to the castle. Are you going to finish your school shopping?" he asked.

"Yeah, I think the bookstore should have cleared out some by now. I'll see you later?"

"Yes," he said, pulling her close and, after looking around, gave her a quick kiss on the lips. "See you ate home."

He let go of her cloak and Disapparated. Freddie smiled to herself and put her hood up. She picked up her cauldron of stuff and headed up the street.

She stopped outside of Borgin and Burke's and, after thinking a minute, decided to go in. She hadn't been in the shop in a while and she was curious to see what oddities they had for sale. She entered the shop and was dismayed to see Ryan at the counter. Fortunately he already had a customer at the counter. Freddie thought about leaving but decided against it.

_It's just Ryan after all. I can handle him, _she told herself. _Especially without Severus here to embarrass me. I can handle Ryan and I can probably get a good deal on something if I decide to buy anything. _

She walked along the shelves, looking at the items they had for sale. She was looking at a strange mirror that didn't show her reflection when she heard the man at the counter speak in a voice she recognized but couldn't identify right offhand. She glanced discreetly over her shoulder. It was a tall, well-dressed man, with long white-blonde hair.

_Mr Malfoy, _she realized. One of her uncle's friends from the ministry, who he invited to his fancy dinner parties. Freddie grimaced and turned away, wishing she'd left when she had a chance.

"Thank you young Mr Burke," Malfoy said, shaking Ryan's hand. "Give your uncle my best."

"Of course. Thank you, Mr Malfoy."

Malfoy turned to go and Freddie kept her eyes on the mirror in front of her, hoping he wouldn't notice her.

"Winifred Gray?"

_Crap_.

"Mr Malfoy," she said, turning to face him with a forced smile.

"Good to see you, Miss Gray. How's your uncle?" he asked, taking her hand and kissing it. She tried not to flinch at his cold lips on her skin.

"I, um, wouldn't know sir," she said, pulling her hand away. "I moved out last month."

"Oh? Have you graduated Hogwarts already?" he asked, looking down at her with icy blue eyes.

"Uh, no sir, I have one more year to go, I just...it was time for me to move out," she said awkwardly.

"You're not living on your own, are you? A pretty young thing like you?"

"No sir," she said, fighting the urge to take a step back. "I'm staying with a friend."

"A friend from school?"

"Yes sir."

"Why isn't she here with you? A girl like you shouldn't be wandering about Knockturn Alley alone," he said with a creepy smile.

"_He _is at work and I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself," she said haughtily, staring up at him in defiance. "I am a Slytherin after all."

"That you are," he chuckled. "Well Miss Gray, should you find yourself in need of anything – money, a place to stay – feel free to call on me. I have plenty of empty rooms in my manor."

"W- aren't you married?" she asked.

She'd met his wife before, she was a pretty woman though she had a sort of pinched face.

"Narcissa would be just fine with having you stay with us. My son, Draco, starts school the year after this, he'd love to bend your ear about Hogwarts no doubt," he said with a chuckle. "Besides, we can't leave a pureblood out on the streets. We are all family, you know?"

"Right, well, I'm not 'out on the streets', Mr Malfoy, but thank you for the offer," she said, trying not to sound too bitchy. "I'll keep it in mind."

"Very well. Take care of yourself, Miss Gray. It was lovely to see you."

He kissed her hand once more before walking out the store with his cane. Freddie exhaled loudly and Ryan, who had been watching the whole interaction, began to laugh.

"You look like you wanted to hex him," he said.

"Ugh, he gives me the creeps," she said, shuddering.

"Me too, a bit," he said, coming around the counter. "Did you really move out from your uncle's?"

"Yeah it's a...long story."

"And you never wrote to me. You said you would, when you were here last year with that broody professor guy."

"Yes," she said with a brief chuckle. "Well things got a little...crazy last year. ...NEWT classes, ya know?"

"Yeah. So, the guy you're living with, he your boyfriend?"

"Yeah, sort of," she said. "Yeah."

"Lucky guy," he said with a crooked grin. "So what're you doing today, just browsing?"

"Yeah, I was getting my school things and thought I'd drop in. What's this mirror thing?" she asked.

"Oh that's a foe glass – it shows when your enemies are close by," he said, picking it up. Shadowy figures appeared in the mirror. "Cool, huh?"

"Cool," she agreed. "How much is it?"

"5 Galleons."

"Even for me?" she asked, smiling at him and batting her eyelashes.

His cheeks reddened and he grinned at her.

"Well for you, I could probably do 3 Galleons," he said, leaning against a shelf, accidentally knocking several objects to the floor. "Oops."

"I got it," Freddie said, bending to pick up what he'd knocked over.

"Wait, don't touch that necklace," he said, whipping his wand out. "It's cursed. It's killed like a dozen Muggles."

"What about this box thing?"

"That's okay to touch," he said, levitating the necklace with his wand and putting it back on the display.

"What is this anyway?" she asked, looking at the tarnished silver box. It had a Celtic design. She opened it curiously and it let out an unearthly wail.

"What the hell?" she asked, quickly closing it.

"It's a trinket box. Cursed so that only the person who puts stuff into it can take it out," he said.

"How much is it?" she asked, thinking she could put her letters to Daniel in it. She'd written things to him she wouldn't want anyone else to read, stuff about Snape.

"For you... I can do 10 Galleons for that and the foe glass together."

"Deal," she agreed. "What happens if someone else tries to take something out?"

"They go deaf. It's reversible though."

"Cool," she said, following him to the counter to pay for her things.

"You know Winnie if you ever need anything – well, I don't wanna sound creepy like Mr Malfoy, but...anyway, you know where to find me," he said, his ears red.

"No worries," she chuckled. "Thanks Ryan."

#

Freddie left Borgin and Burke's and started up the path back towards Diagon Alley. She slowed down as she realized she felt like someone was watching her. She looked around but didn't see anyone, not even the usual hooded lurkers. Still she couldn't shake the feeling. She reached into her cauldron and pulled out the foe glass. There were shadowy figures reflected there but one was getting closer. She saw the long blonde hair of Lucius Malfoy as the figure drew closer and the hair on the back of her neck stood up. She inhaled sharply, focused on the Apothecary, and Disapparated.

She appeared on the sidewalk in Diagon Alley and checked the foe glass again. Malfoy had faded back among the shadowy figures. She breathed a sigh of relief.

_But he was stalking me, _she thought with a chill. _Malfoy was following me. What would he have done if I hadn't Disapparated?_

She tried to put the thought out of her mind and walked into the Apothecary. The familiar smell of herbs and potion ingredients overwhelmed her and she immediately felt calmer.

"Good afternoon, Freddie Gray," said the witch at the counter. "Looking for anything in particular?"

"Hey Gloria," she greeted. "I need an advanced potion making kit."

"I've got them up here by the counter," she said. "So 7th year, huh? Big year. You have plans after you graduate?"

"Yeah, I have a job lined up at St Mungo's with their brewing team," she said, coming up to the counter and getting the kit.

"Oh with Andrea Hawkins?"

"Yeah, that's right."

"That's fantastic. Guess we'll be seeing you around," Gloria said, ringing up her kit.

"Yes ma'am. Thank you."

Freddie left the Apothecary and headed down the street to Flourish and Blotts. The store had emptied out significantly and she was able to get all of her books for school, as well as a few others that looked like interesting reads.

She stopped by the market before heading home, getting the things she'd need to make a chicken casserole. She'd found the recipe a while back and had been wanting to try it, now that Snape had taught her to use the oven properly.

When she arrived at home, she put the groceries up then took her cauldron of stuff upstairs. She put her school supplies in her trunk, leaving her foe glass and _Addressing Animagi _on her bedside table. She took the silver trinket box and cleaned it up using her wand. This time when she opened it the box didn't wail. It was lined with black velvet and had a mirror on the inside of the lid. She dug the letters to Daniel out of her trunk and put them in the box before closing it. She put it on the bedside table, behind the picture of her and Daniel. She smiled sadly at his grinning face, then stood up and headed downstairs to start working on dinner.


	84. Chapter 84

When Snape came home that evening Freddie had the casserole in the oven and the house smelled amazing. She was sitting in his armchair, the book on dementors open in her lap, practicing the Patronus Charm. He Apparated directly into the sitting room, breaking her concentration but it didn't matter – all she'd been getting was wisps of silver.

"Not going well?" he asked with a faint smirk.

"This sucks," she declared, closing the book.

"The book isn't going to help you," he said, sitting down on the couch. "I told you, you need-"

"A happy memory, yeah, yeah, I know," she said irritably.

She took a deep breath and focused on her happy memory – a memory of lying in his arms, right before falling asleep, after he'd given her an amazing orgasm.

"_Expecto Patronum_," she said but again only wisps of silver. "Dammit!" She got up and threw her wand down in the chair. "It's useless! _I'm _useless. Apparently I'm freakin miserable. I don't have a happy enough memory. This is stupid!"

She felt her anger rising and she quickly shutting it down, using her Occlumency to clear her mind before she lost control of her magic.

"Relax," Snape said soothingly. "Come here."

He opened his arms and Freddie walked over to him. He pulled her into his lap and put his arms around her.

"You will get it," he said, kissing her swiftly. "Maybe not in a week, but you will get there. You are smart, you just need practice."

"All I've done is practice, all afternoon," she complained, laying her head on his chest.

"That's not all you've done," he said, putting his chin on top of her head. "I smell chicken."

"Yeah," she chuckled. "It'll be done in half an hour. It's called Holy Chicken Casserole."

"It smells good. I suppose you finally figured out the oven," he said and she could feel him smile.

"I did."

"Did you finish getting your school supplies?"

"Yeah and I went into Borgin and Burke's after lunch. I got a neat little thing called a foe glass – do you know what that is?"

"I do."

"It's pretty cool. It showed me when Malfoy was following me in Knockturn Alley."

"Wh- _Lucius _Malfoy?" he asked, pulling his head back to look at her.

"Yeah, you know him? He's one of my uncle's friends. I saw him in Borgin and Burke's and, well, he was creepy and-"

"Creepy how?"

"He kissed my hand with his creepy cold dead fish lips and he offered me a place to stay."

"He- what?"

She felt him enter her mind and dig through her recent memories until he found the scene in Borgin and Burke's. Freddie relaxed into his lap, laying her head on his thighs and he reviewed the memory. She watched his face flush in anger then clear as he withdrew from her mind.

"You know him?" she asked as he stroked her hair absently.

"Yes, I know him," he said in a low voice. "He is my...friend."

"_Really_?" she said, opening her eyes. "_That _guy is your friend?"

"We went to school together and...just, steer clear of him. He can be...dangerous."

"I was nice, or at least I tried to be. He seems like the sort of man you wouldn't want to piss off."

"You are right about that," he murmured, running his fingers through her hair, then his hand closed into a fist. "I cannot believe he followed you." His voice was an angry hiss. "I want to know what he was thinking, what he was planning to do if he'd caught up with you alone?"

"You could go ask him," she said. "Go hex him and make him tel you."

"I can't do that," he said, relaxing his grip on her hair. "Although I wish I could...go up to him, tell him you are _mine, _my plaything, not his, _mine_."

He grabbed her hair tightly again and pulled her head up to kiss her roughly. She smiled up at him, pleased with his possessiveness.

_His. His plaything. Not Malfoy's, not Ryan's, not anyone else's. His._

She sat up in his lap to kiss him properly, hoping that he would take her right there on the couch...only to be interrupted by the beeping of the oven timer.

_ Damn. _

"Go get your casserole," he said, kissing her briefly. "Before it burns."

"_Okay_," she said with an exaggerated sigh, climbing out of his lap.

She grabbed her wand and hurried into the kitchen. She turned off the timer and opened the oven. She used her wand to levitate the casserole from the oven and placed it on the counter.

"Wine?" Snape asked, following her into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle.

"Yes please," she said and he brushed against her as he reached to get two glasses from the cabinet. "Can you get two plates down please?"

"Here," he said, handing them to her. "So this is your holy casserole?"

"Holy chicken casserole," she corrected with a smile. "It's supposed to be served over rice but, uh, it turns out rice isn't the easiest thing to make."

"You burned it?" he asked with a smirk.

"Yeah. Twice," she admitted sheepishly.

"You tried," he said, kissing her forehead before he turned to pour the wine.

Freddie fixed their plates and carried them over to the table. Snape put her glass of wine down in front of her then took his seat. She took a drink of wine, waiting for his reaction as he took a bite of casserole.

"Well?" she prompted as he chewed slowly. "How is it?"

"It is good," he said, swallowing. "In fact, it's the best thing you've ever cooked."

Freddie flushed with pride and beamed as he took another bite.

"You will make some man a good house wife someday," he said and her face fell. "Assuming you learn how _not _to burn rice."

She scoffed and pushed her food around her plate before taking a bite. She didn't want to be 'some man's wife' she wanted to be his – whatever. Not wife. He wasn't the marrying type and she was fine with that. She wasn't sure she was either. She didn't want to be anyone's house wife. The idea of staying home, popping out babies, cooking and cleaning for 'some man' was downright abhorrent.

"I'm nobody's house wife," she muttered, stabbing a piece of chicken with her fork.


	85. Chapter 85

**Author's Note: I had a guest ask two questions one of my previous chapters so I figured I'd answer them here. Freddie is 17 at the moment, her birthday is in February. 17 makes her a legal adult in the Wizarding World. And yes she has noticed and mentioned Snape's Dark Mark but it was wayyyy back earlier in the story, not sure of the chapter but it was even before Daniel's disappearance. **

**To everyone else, hope y'all are still enjoying this and please leave me reviews when you can. They really brighten my days! Also I got a job starting this week (assistant manager of a retail store). I'm hoping it won't interfere with my writing too much but my updates may not be as frequent. But I am still committed to finishing this fic and even have an end in mind although its still a ways off at this point. Thank you all for reading!**

Later that night Freddie lay in Snape's embrace as he started to doze off but she couldn't quite relax. Her thoughts were racing, wondering about the future. She tried to use her Occlumency to calm her mind but it wasn't working.

"What's wrong with you?" Snape murmured sleepily.

"Hm? Nothing. Nothing, I'm fine."

"You aren't sleeping," he said, nuzzling the crook of her neck. "Tell me."

"Can I...ask you something?"

"Mmhm," he said, kissing a spot below her ear.

"What happens when school starts back?"

"You get on the train, you go to school, and you go to class."

"No I mean...this. We'll have to stop, won't we?" she asked, unable to hep feeling sad.

"Mm. For a while. There may be...weekends, holidays, where we can slip away," he said with a yawn. He rolled onto his back and Freddie nestled into the crook of his arm. "I am enjoying myself too much to want to stop now. But we have to be careful. At Hogwarts. There were rumors last year. We must do our best to dispel them."

"You know about that?" she asked, lifting her head to look at him.

"Mm. Dumbledore spoke to me."

"What? You didn't tell me!"

"I had no reason to. Dumbledore trusts me," he said, yawning again.

"It was his idea for me to stay here. He must _really _trust you," she said.

_Either that or Dumbledore knew this would happen and supported it, _she thought. _Could he have?_

"Mm. Go to sleep now, Winifred," he said, giving her a light squeeze.

She smiled and lay her head on his chest. His chest hair tickled her nose and she rubbed it against his chest to keep from sneezing.

_Weekends and holidays, _she thought drowsily. _And we'll still work together on potions. It won't be so bad... As for what happens after I graduate, well that's a long way away. I'm not going to worry about that til I have to. _

#

Early the next morning she woke slightly when Snape rolled over and started kissing her.

"Early," she protested not opening her eyes.

"Mm-hm. I have to go to work," he said, kissing his way down her jaw to her neck.

"I don't," she said sleepily, rolling over on her stomach. He kissed her bare shoulder.

"You should get used to it. School starts back next month," he murmured, brushing her hair aside to kiss the back of her neck, sending shivers through her.

"Next month – that's four weeks," she yawned. "Four weeks of sleep."

"You're going to sleep the whole month?" he chuckled, kissing her neck again. She moaned softly as he trailed kisses slowly down her neck, between her shoulder blades, then up to her shoulder. He kissed her right shoulder, then nipped it lightly. She could feel his cock against the back of her thigh.

"I'm not really awake," she moaned, but she shifted her legs apart anyway.

"Mm-hm," he said, kissing her neck again.

He put an arm around her, lifting her up. She managed to get on her knees and he entered her in one swift movement. She let out a loud moan as he began to thrust quickly inside of her. He grabbed a fistful of her hair and pushed her face down into the pillow. He pushed himself inside of her hard, pulled out, then thrust back in roughly, making her cry out in mixed pain and pleasure, over and over. She bit the pillow to muffle her sounds and she couldn't ask when she needed to cum because she was biting the pillow and it was already happening. With one last grunt he emptied himself inside of her and Freddie collapsed on the bed, spent. He kissed the back of her neck once more before rolling off of her and getting out of bed.

"I've got to get ready for work," he said.

"Mkay. Have a good days," she murmured and yawned tiredly. He chuckled and pulled the blanket over her before leaving the room as she drifted back off to sleep.

Sometime later she thought she felt him kiss her again but she was too asleep to respond.

When she finally did wake up, sunlight was streaming through the curtains. She sat up and stretched, feeling deliciously sore but well-rested. Then she noticed something on the nightstand that hadn't been there before. A magazine and an envelope with her name on it – Freddie. She picked up the envelope first, wondering who it was from. It couldn't be Snape, he called her Winifred, plus it wasn't his handwriting. She about to open it when she saw the magazine – _Apothecary Now. _

She grabbed it eagerly, flipping through it until she found her recipe...along with a 4x6 photo of her and Snape. He had his hand on her shoulder, his face expressionless, neither smiling nor frowning. And she looked fantastic in her black dress, a smirk playing on her lips. The cauldron on the desk in front of her had spirals of smoke coming off of it, the only movement in the picture apart from Freddie's brown eyes blinking.

There was a caption beneath the photo that read 'Winifred Gray, inventory of the Invisibility Antidote, and apprentice of Severus Snape, Potions Master at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry'.

Freddie grinned broadly and scanned her recipe to make sure they hadn't screwed it up. They hadn't.

"Awesome," she said aloud to Hemlock who sat beside her on the bed. "And it's a great picture."

She stared at it a moment then picked up her wand from the bedside table. She made a copy of the page and blew it up to poster size. She got out of bed and took the poster to the charcoal-colored wall. She hung it up with a Sticking Charm, then stood back to admire her handiwork.

"Nice," she said to Hemlock, sitting back on the edge of the bed.

She picked up the envelope which she had almost forgotten about and opened it. She unfolded the parchment inside. It was a letter from Amelia.

_Hey Freddie!_

_ How's your summer going? Mine's going great! Brian and I have been on six dates so far. I've been to his house, met his mum, and even got to spend the night! I can't wait to tell you about it in person._

_ I got my Hogwarts supply list today and I'm going to Diagon Alley tomorrow (Tuesday) to get my things. If you want to meet up with me I'll be outside Flourish and Blotts at 12 o'clock. We can have lunch together – my treat!_

_ I hope to see you there. _

_ Cheers, _

_ Amelia Burke_

Freddie folded up the letter and checked her watch. It was a little after 10. She had plenty of time to meet up with Amelia if she wanted to.

_But do I want to? _She thought, putting the letter aside. _She _is _my friend. My only friend really, besides Severus. And if she's dating O'Neil then she's probably gotten over her crush on me. ...I should go. Even thought I've already gotten my supplies I can help Amelia get hers and we can hang out. It's good to have friends. _

She got up off the bed and stretched again, her back popping slightly. She crossed the hall to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

After her shower Freddie went back to her room. She used her wand to dry her hair, then shaved. She got dressed, putting on her short black sundress she'd worn the first night Snape had fucked her.

She had time to kill before she needed to leave so she sat on the edge of her bed and practiced her Patronus Charm. When she got frustrated with that she picked up _Addressing Animagi _and took it downstairs to read. With Hemlock tucked under her arm she curled up on the couch and started to read.


	86. Chapter 86

She'd set her watch for 11:50 and when it beeped she stood up from the couch. She left her book on the arm of the couch. She debated on whether or not to leave Hemlock and without thinking about it Hemlock shrunk in her hand. Her dress didn't have pockets so she tucked him in her bra between her breasts, not visible.

She hurried upstairs and grabbed her hooded cloak and a scrap of parchment so she could leave a note for Snape. She grabbed her copy of _Apothecary Now _so she could show Amelia, and put it in the pocket of her cloak.

_Dresses should have pockets, _she thought as she went back downstairs. _Maybe I should learn to sew, then I could make pockets. Or I could get a purse. _

She put the scrap of parchment against the cover of her book and scribbled a note to Snape.

_**Gone to Diagon Alley to hang out with Amelia. Be home later. **_

_**❤️ Freddie**_

She signed her name with a heart next to it and left the note on the arm of the couch. After making sure she had everything she needed, she closed her eyes and Disapparated.

"Freddie!"

She opened her eyes on the streets of Diagon Alley just in time to see Amelia rushing towards her. The girl gave her a big hug. Freddie almost didn't recognize her as she'd changed her hair to a hot pink.

"It's so good to see you!" Amelia said, releasing her and beaming up at her.

"It's good to see you too, kid. What'd you do to your hair?"

"Color-Changing Charm. You like it?"

"Yeah I do. It suits you."

"I did a poison-green for a while but I like this better. How've you been? You wanna go get something to eat?"

"Sure. I know this little Bistro place down the street, unless you'd rather go to the Leaky Cauldron?"

"Bistro sounds good. The pub is always full of old people," she said, making a face and Freddie chuckled.

"How are you – how's O'Neil?" she asked with a wink as they started down the street.

"Great! I was a little nervous at first ya know but on our first date he took me to the ice cream parlor and we stayed there for hours, talking and laughing. It was really great, he's great. He's funny, he makes me laugh. The first time he held my hand I got butterflies!"

"That's sweet. He's a good kid," Freddie said, smiling. "I'm surprised he's not here with you."

"I'm meeting him at 4 actually and I'm going back to his house until term starts back."

"Ooo. That serious, huh?"

"Yeah. And his mum's great – she even lets us sleep in the same room ya know."

"Yeah? You're taking a contraceptive potion, right?"

"I, um, well..." she said, her face flushing almost the same color as her hair.

"You need to be careful," Freddie cautioned. "An unplanned pregnancy, at your age? You don't want to get kicked out of school."

"Definitely not. Is that something you could help me with?"

"Yeah, I can brew one for you and send it by owl when I get home," she replied. "There's a new one that you only have to take once a month, think you can manage that?"

"Definitely."

"If you take it the day you start your period, it gets rid of it. And makes it easy not to forget it."

"Awesome," she declared. "No period, no babies, just fun time."

"Right," Freddie chuckled.

"See, that's why I wanted to hang out with you – girl talk. The only person I've been hanging out with is Brian. Honestly I just need some girl time."

"Me too," Freddie agreed as they reached the Bistro. "I actually got my school stuff yesterday but I wanted to hang out."

They ordered Butterbeer and sat at a small table outside. Remembering how she'd seen Geck the last time she was there, Freddie put her hood up.

"What's with the hood? It's a beautiful day," Amelia said, picking up the menu.

"The last time I was here Geck spotted me and chased me down an alley," she mumbled.

"_What_? Did he attack you?"

"He would've but I Disapparated."

"Man... you're lucky you can do that now."

"Yeah," she agreed.

When the waitress came to take their order, they both ordered a burger and crisps.

"So, what've you been up to this summer?" Amelia asked her.

"Not much – oh! Check this out," she said, pulling the magazine from her robe pocket and flipping it open to her recipe.

"You finished your antidote!"

"Yep," she said proudly.

"_And _you got a picture with Snape. He doesn't look happy."

"He never does," she chuckled though she knew now that was a lie. She'd seen him look plenty happy over the last month.

"Have you been working with him over the summer still? This picture was taken at Hogwarts, wasn't it?"

"Well," she said slowly. "I'm sort of staying with him."

She'd decided it would be okay to tell her at least that part of her summer. She laughed as Butterbeer shot out of Amelia's nose.

"What?!" She shouted. "Are you – you two are – I _knew _it!"

"Shut up, you're making people stare," Freddie chuckled, handing her a napkin. "It's _not _like _that_. I moved out of my uncle's house – I had to. Something bad happened, he...he made me go to Azkaban to visit my parents and there were all these dementors and...it was bad. Really bad." Amelia stared, her blue eyes wide as Freddie continued. "So I went to Hogwarts. I thought Dumbledore might let me stay there but apparently there's some big rule about students not staying at the castle over the summer. So, he suggested I stay with Snape. Since the two of us have gotten along well, worked together well, over the last year."

"And he actually _agreed _to it?" she asked in disbelief.

"Eventually. Reluctantly," she said with a grin.

"What's it like? What's he like? What's his house like? Tell me everything!"

"Um, well, it's definitely weird. Or it was at first. He mostly avoids me, spends his days at Hogwarts. I hardly ever see him," she lied smoothly. "I pretty much have the house to myself all the time. I've been brewing potions, readings. I'm learning to cook, which is pretty cool."

"What's his house like?"

"Small. He has a lot of books, and I mean _a lot _of books. It's like living in a library. It was pretty dusty when I got there but I've cleaned up a bit. I don't think he ever really stays there. Why would he when he could just stay in the castle?"

"So you basically have the house all to yourself? It's like having your own place – wait, why didn't you just get an apartment or something?"

"i don't have any income right now and I don't want to deplete my savings, especially when I have to go back to school in a month. I can't sign a lease or whatever. I'll get an apartment after I graduate, when I get my job at St Mungos."

"That makes sense," she said as the waitress brought their food. "Can I see Snape's house? Can you take me there?"

"Are you kidding me? He'd kill me!"

"He wouldn't have to know, you said he's never there," she reasoned.

"The man knows everything, Amelia. I can't."

"Yeah, okay," she said, eating one of her fries. "So there's nothing going on between you two? No hankypanky?"

"No! No way!" she declared. "And you can't tell anyone that I'm staying with him – not even Brian."

"Why not?"

"You know why. All those rumors last year. I don't want to screw up whatever friendship it is that he and I have. Promise me you won't tell anyone."

"I promise," Amelia said solemnly. "You know...maybe you _should _do it."

"Do what?"

"Snape. He's not terribly unattractive. He's older, experienced. I bet he'd be good in bed," she said with a sly grin. "And you're really pretty. I bet if you came onto him-"

"Oh my god. No, no way in hell," she said, shaking her head. "Shut up and eat your fries. Besides – I'm sort of seeing someone. A boy."

"From school?"

"No, he went to Durmstrang but he graduated a few years ago. His name is Ryan. And that's all you get to know about that."


	87. Chapter 87

After lunch, Freddie and Amelia set about getting her school things. When they'd finished getting everything on her list, they got smoothies from a street vendor. Freddie sipped a mango banana smoothie as they wandered down the street.

"There's one more place I need to go," Amelia said, swirling her straw in her strawberry drink.

"Hm? We've gotten everything on your list."

"No, it's not for school, it's...well, follow me," she said, motioning for Freddie to follow her.

Curious, Freddie followed Amelia down the street then down a side street. She stopped outside of shop with lingerie-clad mannequins.

"Mistress Madeline's?" Freddie read the sign above the door.

"Yeah, I – I want to look sexy, ya know? I'm about to spend the next month with Brian. But I'm kinda nervous about going in by myself. Plus I need someone to tell me what looks good on me."

"Alright," Freddie agreed with a chuckle. "Fine."

"Yay! Thanks Freddie. Maybe we can find something for you, too – for Ryan," she said with a wink.

"Right," she said, following her inside.

They walked into the shop which had numerous racks laden with various skimpy outfits of silk and lace. Freddie followed Amelia around as she browsed the racks. She couldn't imagine herself wearing any of this stuff – scraps of fabric that barely covered anything. Corsets. Crotch-less panties.

"Here, hold these for me," Amelia said, shoving several items into Freddie's arms so she could stand on tiptoes to get a pink thong off a higher rack. "You want one? There's a black one, I know you like black."

"I dunno, Amelia, I'm not sure anything in here is really my style," she said uncomfortably.

"Well it's not _for _you, it's for him. And you only have to wear it for a minute."

"Bonjour ladies," said a woman with a heavy french accent. "Can I help you find anything?"

She was a tall, busty woman. She wore a flowy purple dress and had red hair done up in ringlets. She had on a lot of makeup with bright red lipstick.

"I'm good," Amelia said, flipping through another rack.

"I don't – I'm good," Freddie mumbled, shaking her head.

"Don't look so embarrassed, _cherie, _it's just us girls here. My name is Madeline," she said, extending her hand. Her nails were long and painted blood-red to match her lipstick. Freddie shook her hand dubiously.

"Freddie," she said as Madeline smiled at her.

"Wonderful to meet you, _cherie_. Now I would be delighted to help you find something special, something you will be comfortable in, yes?"

"I, uh...well maybe something that...covers more?"

"Ah, come with me darling," Madeline said, putting her arm around her. Freddie put her armload of Amelia's stuff on top of a rack and let Madeline lead her to the other side of the shop.

"Let's start here," she said, showing her to a wall of different style robes. There were satin ones, silk ones, ones that were brightly colored, and ones that were see-through.

"See anything you like?" Madeline purred.

Freddie touched a few items but here eyes were drawn to a sheer red gown made out of some material she didn't recognize.

"Aha," Madeline said, noticing her gaze. "A lovely choice. It's a blend of silk and unicorn hair."

She pulled it off the hook and held it out. Freddie touched the gown – it was impossibly soft.

"I guess that's not so bad," she murmured.

"Wonderful! Now, let's see what we can find to go underneath it," Madeline said, wandering over to a rack of corsets.

"Oh, I don't know about, uh..."

"_Cherie, _you are gorgeous. Beautiful. _Tres belle. _Show it off for your beau – or for yourself, if you do not have a man. Let yourself feel sexy."

"No, I have a – there's a guy," she said, feeling her cheeks grow warm. "A man."

"I'm sure he will appreciate your dressing up for him."

"Well he's...older," she said, glancing over her shoulder to make sure Amelia wasn't listening. She was across the shop, engrossed in the different types of underwear. "He's quite a bit older. Sort of old-fashioned and I...well, I worry he might think it's silly."

"Oh hush darling. Men of all ages appreciate a little something extra – something sexy, alluring. Provocative. Even if they've seen it all before, they never get tired of it. Trust me, _cherie, _he will love it."

Not fully convinced, Freddie nodded. She let Madeline pick out a few corsets and followed her to a changing room. She tried on the corsets, looking at her reflection in the mirror. Every one she put on instantly tightened magically, making her look even thinner than she was and squishing her boobs out the top. She put her sundress back on and came out shaking her head.

"You don't like them?" Madeline asked, crestfallen.

"Well they're sort of stiff and hard to breathe. Sorry," she said sheepishly.

"Do not worry, _cherie_! Our goal is to find something that makes _you _feel good _and _look good. I promise you we will succeed. We have plenty of options to chose from. Come."

Freddie spent the next hour trying on bustiers, chemises, camisoles, teddies, and a host of other lingerie she soon forgot the names of. She hated the garters as much as she did the corsets and thigh-high stockings. But in the end Madeline delivered on her promise and found things she _did _like. A green satin bustier with a black lace front. A black silk chemise that was see-through down the back. A sheer black camisole that ended in a large fringe just above her hips. And a host of new underwear and bras.

Amelia had a large bag full of stuff, all of which looked fantastic on her. Madeline thanked them for their business and they walked back out onto the street.

"I've got to go meet Brian in just a few minutes," Amelia said, checking her watch as they reached the main street.

"You want me to wait for him with you?" she offered.

"Nah, that's okay. Go get your sexy on with the mysterious Mr Ryan," she said with a wink.

"Alright," she chuckled. "See you on September 1st."


	88. Chapter 88

**Author's Note: Sorry in the delay in updates recently. I started a new job and am working full time as an assistant manager at a retail store (which, with this whole "pandemic panic" is more crazy than ever! So I havent written much while I settle in to my new daily routine but once I get accustomed to it I hope to start writing more regularly again. I havent forgotten about y'all tho and in the meantime here is a rather steamy update! Thank you all for your patience and your loyalty! **

#

When she went home she Apparated directly into her bedroom. She took her new lingerie out of the bag and put it away in her dresser. She still wasn't sure what Snape would think of them and she didn't want to put any of it on just yet. She decided to go downstairs and work on her Patronus Charm for a bit.

She headed down the stairs and opened the door to the sitting room. She was surprised to find Snape was there, sitting in his armchair. He had a small fire going and he was reading a book.

"Hey, you're home," she said, surprised. "What are you doing?"

"Reading," he answered. "How was your afternoon with your friend?"

"Fun, it was fun. We had lunch, did some shopping, talked about boys."

"Boys?" he asked disdainfully, looking over his book at her.

"Yeah, she's dating Brian O'Neil."

"You did not talk about me, did you?"

"Of course not," she said, affronted.

"Good," he said lightly and she sat on the couch, somewhat offended that he thought she might tell Amelia about him.

"So, Avery and O'Neil? I suppose she has gotten over her little crush on you?"

"I guess so," she chuckled.

"Good. That is what happens with crushes. They pass," he said with a faint sneer.

She sat on the couch, staring at him as he resumed reading his book. She was trying to figure out if it was a slight towards her or if he was just being...Snape.

"What?" he asked dryly, not looking up at her.

"...Nothing," she said finally, standing up from the couch. "I'm going upstairs to work on my Patronus Charm."

He grunted in response. Freddie scoffed slightly and headed back upstairs. She sat on the edge of her bed with Hemlock in her lap and her wand in her hand, staring at the picture of her and Snape on her wall.

_I wish I knew what you were thinking, you stubborn old man, _she thought. _I wish I could get into your head like you so easily get into mine. _

She turned away and sat back against the headboard. She practiced her Patronus Charm for a while, but she was distracted. She wasn't getting anywhere. She couldn't make any progress on her Patronus when she was worried about Snape.

"Mind games," she muttered aloud. "His specialty."

She glanced back at the poster on her wall then smiled slowly. She could play mind games, too. She knew how to make him happy, at least for a little while.

She put Hemlock and her wand on her bedside table and went over to her dresser. She put on the sheer black camisole and a new pair of black lace hipster underwear. She put on the red gown and tied it loosely in the front. She pulled her hair out of the ponytail and shook it loose around her shoulders. She dabbed her honeysuckle perfume on her wrists and neck, then headed downstairs.

Her heart was pounding as she came down the last step, her mind racing with doubts as she entered the sitting room to find Snape exactly as she had left him. He didn't look at her, didn't seem to notice her enter the room. She was trembling slightly as she walked in front of him, her heart beating loudly in her ears.

When he finally looked up at her she undid the sash of her robe, letting it fall open so he could see her new lingerie. His eyes darkened and he set the book down in his lap.

"What are you doing, little girl?" he asked, his voice low and husky.

"Can I suck your cock, sir?" she asked in her best sexy voice. "It seems like you might be having a bad day and I thought, maybe, I could help?"

She took a few steps closer until she was standing right in front of him. She slid the robe off her shoulders and let it pool beneath her on the floor. She saw his pupils dilate as he looked over her slowly.

"Can I please suck your cock, sir?" she asked again, licking her lips. "Please?"

"You may," he said, sounding indifferent as he picked up his book. She sank to her knees in front of him as he resumed reading.

_He's going to ignore me? We'll see how long that lasts. I'll _make _him pay attention, _she thought determinedly. She unbuttoned his pants, lowered his zipper, and snaked her hand into his pants. She wrapped her fingers around his hardening cock and freed it from his pants.

She licked him slowly until he was fully erect. She swirled her tongue around the head of his cock and looked up at him to see if he was paying attention. He wasn't. His dark eyes were moving back and forth across the page of his book.

She hummed, mildly annoyed at his facade of indifference, and took him deep into her mouth, as deep as she could. She heard his sharp intake of breath and glanced up but he was still looking at his book. She growled softly and slowly pulled up off his cock, leaving a trail of saliva in her wake. She swirled her tongue again around the head of his cock, then licked her way down his shaft. She pulled his boxers aside and began to lick his balls slowly. She heard him groan softly but he still had his book in his hands. She continued to lick then sucked his balls into her mouth.

"Easy," he hissed. "Gently."

She released his balls from her mouth and glanced up at him. He was still reading. She licked him gently, caressing his balls with her tongue before sucking them carefully into her mouth again. She sucked gently, bathing them with her tongue as she did.

She heard him groan and hiss softly but still he didn't put the book down.

_You're gonna put that damn book down if it kills me, _she thought, releasing his balls with a soft pop.

She redoubled her efforts on his cock, sucking like she was intent on sucking the life out of him. She sucked, pushing her head all the way down his shaft. Then she felt the head of his cock push into her throat, deeper than it had ever been, into her esophagus. Surprised, she started to choke slightly. She couldn't breathe but she'd be damned if she was going to stop. She pushed her head down farther until her lips touched his balls, and she wiggled her butt happily. Then something hard hit her head.

She choked and, opening her mouth wide so she wouldn't hurt him, she quickly pulled back. She rocked back on her heels, coughing, the book he'd dropped on her head fell to the floor. She looked up at him, saliva and precum dripping down her chin. He grabbed her arms, pulling her into his lap.

"You are _evil_," he growled, kissing her neck as he frantically pulled her underwear off of her. "Little girl, you are the devil."

She giggled as he pulled her thighs apart. She straddled him in the chair and he guided his cock into her. She tried to move, to thrust him into her deeply, but it was awkward in the chair. He had his hands on her hips, trying to control her movements.

Suddenly he picked her up, pulling her off of him, and pushing her onto the floor.

"Wh-" she started but then he was on top of her, pushing her head back on the floor as he positioned himself between her thighs. She arched her hips to meet him as he entered her and she moaned loudly.

"Evil, _evil _little witch," he said, sliding his hands beneath her camisole. His hands felt like fire on her bare skin. "Naughty little girl."

"Mm- ah!" she gasped as his hands found her breasts. "I take it you – you like my lingerie?"

"Yesss," he hissed, kneading her breasts roughly. "Yes, it's – you're beautiful."

She gasped again and he pulled the camisole up over her head.

_He just called me beautiful, _she thought fervently.

He quickened his pace inside of her and she felt something building deep inside her. Waves of pleasure started to roll though her.

"S-Severus, I – I'm -" she gasped but she couldn't get the words out.

"Cum," he growled. "Cum for me, my little witch. Cum."

"Yes!" she cried out, her hands clawing at the floor as her orgasm ripped through her. "Yes, yes, yes!"

She felt him inside of her, felt him inside of her body and her mind as he fucked her though one orgasm straight into another without stopping. She could feel him, feel his need, his desire to hear her scream.

"F-fuck!" she said, wrapping her legs around him, wanting to pull him deeper. "Please, please, Severus! Cum – yes!"

He grunted loudly and she felt his cock jerk inside of her followed by jet after jet of hot cum coating her insides.

When he was spent he rolled off of her and collapsed on his back on the floor, breathing hard. Freddie was breathing too but she felt her face flush as she realized how loud she'd been.

"You _were _loud," he said, rolling onto his side to kiss her. "If I do have neighbors, they have probably called the police."

She smacked his shoulder but smiled.

"Did that fix your bad mood?" she asked when she'd caught her breath.

"I was not in a bad mood," he said, kissing her again. "But yes."

She chuckled quietly.

"I – I deep-throated your cock," she said, flushing harder. "I've never, I mean, that was...awesome."

"Mm, yes you did. _Very _good girl," he said with a smile then kissed her again, more passionately this time.

"You liked that, huh?" she asked, grinning broadly, feeling like a dope.

"I did."

"And you like my lingerie?"

"I do."

"And...do you really think I'm beautiful?" she asked quietly, looking away. He put his hand under her chin and tilted her face up, forcing her to meet his gaze.

"You are beyond beautiful," he murmured, then kissed her lips gently. She smiled and stared into the depths of eyes which were brown and warm in the flickering firelight.


	89. Chapter 89

**Author's Note: I'm so sorry I just abandoned this fic and all of my readers, but life got so crazy these last few months. My new job didn't last a month (thanks Covid) and everything just got...crazy! I lost a job, lost my uncle, and two days later lost my cousin. My Mom is still doing well and in remission but we have been hunkered down trying to avoid this virus! You'd think having all that free time I would have gotten more writing done, but I just couldn't make my Writing Brain work. My Depression Brain took over and I've had a rough 3 months... But today I had some time and some energy so I'm going to at least type up everything I've had written down but untyped for the last three months and then see if I can't pick up writing where I left off. So without further ado, here's the next chapter!**

**PS: I hope that you all are okay and have survived in this batshit crazy world these last three months!**

#

It was this memory that helped Freddie finally make progress on her Patronus Charm. The memory of lying in Snape's arms as he called her beautiful, getting lost in his chocolate eyes.

It was Thursday afternoon and she was sitting in the armchair, practicing the spell. With her wand in hand, she focused on that blissful feeling, and said the incantation. The silver substance erupted from her wand tip and swirled around the floor, almost taking the shape of something before dissipating.

"Whoa!" she exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "What was that?"

Snape was at work so she was talking to herself. It had been small – not insect-sized, more the size of a small dog or something.

_At least it's not a bug, _she thought, pleased. _That means my Animagus won't be a bug. Definitely not a mosquito. _

She chuckled quietly and tried again. She focused on how happy she'd felt as Snape had kissed her and told her how beautiful she was. _Beyond beautiful. _That feeling, colored with the excitement she felt about her Patronus -

"Expecto Patronum," she said, brandishing her wand.

The magic swirled again in front of the fireplace, in a ball at first, then it solidified, taking the form of-

"A cat," she gasped. "No – a kneazle! It's Hemlock!"

She laughed delightedly and sank to her knees on the floor. The Patronus circled her curiously, his lion-like tail waving. When she reached out to touch him, he jumped away. She watched the silver kneazle pounce around the sitting room before he vanished in a wisp of silver.

"I did it!" she whooped loudly.

_A kneazle, _she thought, feeling very pleased with herself. _That means I'd be a kneazle, too! My Animagus form will be a kneazle._

She cackled loudly and rushed upstairs to get Hemlock. She'd left him sitting on her bed when she got up that morning. When she got to her room she lifted her wand again.

"Expecto Patronum."

The silvery kneazle erupted from her wand tip and pounced around her room. He leapt onto her bed and sniffed the stuffed animal. He pushed Hemlock over then pounced on him. He played with him a minute, kicking him playfully with his hind legs. Then he stood up, shook himself, and vanished.

Freddie cast the Patronus a few more times, just to be sure she could. It was almost effortless now.

"I can't wait to show Severus!" she said to Hemlock, grinning broadly.

So she decided not to wait.

She sat on the edge of her bed and pulled on her boots. She had on her jean shorts and a Nirvana t-shirt she'd found at a Muggle shop. It had the band name on it in yellow and a smiley face with X's for eyes. She grabbed her hairbrush and ran it through her hair a few times before tossing it on the bed and Disapparating.

She appeared outside the Hogwarts gates to find it was drizzling rain.

"Dammit," she said, quickly pulling out her wand. She cast a spell to use her wand as an umbrella as she started across the grounds. She was about halfway to the castle when she spotted the tall figure of Albus Dumbledore walking up from Hagrid's hut. He was wearing bright crimson robes and he waved when he saw her. She immediately threw up her mental shield.

"Miss Gray!" he said cheerfully as he approached. "Is everything okay? Are you looking for Severus?"

"Oh yes sir, everything's fine. I just wanted to show Severus – I mean, Professor Snape," she amended quickly but Dumbledore's blue eyes were twinkling. "I, uh, mastered the Patronus Charm. I wanted to show him."

She lowered her wand from the umbrella position and was pelted with rain as she cast her Patronus.

"Well done, Miss Gray!" he praised, watching the kneazle run around the grounds at top speed until it jumped into a puddle and vanished. "How delightful!"

"Thank you, sir," she said proudly, re-doing her umbrella charm. "I've been working on it for weeks – it wasn't easy. But if I ever see a dementor again, I'll be ready."

"I sincerely hope you never have that misfortune again," he said solemnly. "They are dreadful creatures... How have you been enjoying your summer? I trust Severus has not been _too _unpleasant?"

"He's not too bad. He mostly avoids me," she said, sticking with the lie she'd told Amelia. "I pretty much have the house to myself."

"So you're enjoying yourself?" he asked with a smile.

"Oh yes sir. I've been learning to cook. I cook, brew potions, read. I mastered the Patronus Charm. I plan on studying up on Animagi next – I'd like to try to become one."

"An ambitious goal. It's a difficult bit of magic, even moreso than the Patronus Charm."

"Yeah. Are you – I mean, can you-?" she asked uncertainly. Dumbledore was a powerful wizard, probably _the _most powerful wizard in the world. No doubt he _could _do it but she'd never heard anyone mention him being one.

"I can," Dumbledore confirmed. "It is a skill I acquired when I was a much younger man, in my first decade of teaching at Hogwarts. However, I never really cared for it."

_How could you not care for it_? She wondered.

"I met an Animagus in Diagon Alley the other day – she wrote a book on Animagi. She told me your Animagus form matches the form your Patronus takes. That means I'll be a Kneazle, right?"

"It is possible, but is is not true in 100% of cases," he said as they stepped into the Entrance Hall and Freddie pushed her damp hair back from her face. "Your Patronus can change shape, but your Animagus form will always be the same."

"Patronuses can change?" Freddie asked, surprised. "I didn't know that."

"Yes, they can change over time as you age and your personality becomes more defined. It can also happen when one suffers a great loss, in which case the change is often permanent. Another reason a Patronus may change is if one falls in love and the memories used to conjure the Patronus are ones associated with their love."

"I see," Freddie said, nodding her head thoughtfully. "...I bet you were a really good teacher, weren't you?"

"How do you think I became Headmaster?" he asked with a smile. "I expect you'll find Severus in his office."

"Yes sir. Thank you," she said as he started up the Grand Staircase.

"You're very welcome, Miss Gray. Have a good afternoon."

"You too, sir."

Freddie hurried down into the dungeons feeling altogether pleased with herself. Not only had she mastered the Patronus Charm, but she'd survived an encounter with Dumbledore without a lapse in her Occlumency or saying anything she shouldn't.

She found herself thinking about what Dumbledore had said about Patronuses changing. What if her Patronus was only a kneazle because of the memory she'd used? A memory of Snape, someone she loved. That would mean her Animagus form might be different, might not be a kneazle after all.

She stopped outside of Snape's office door. She reached for the doorknob then stopped abruptly and knocked. A moment passed, then -

"Enter," said Snape's voice, sounding annoyed.

She opened the door to find him sitting at his desk.

"Winifred!" he said, surprised. "I thought you were Minerva."

"McGonagall? Why?"

"Nevermind that. What are you doing here? Did something happen?" he asked, suddenly concerned.

"No, no. Nothing bad. Check this out," she said, pulling out her wand. "Expecto Patronum."

The shining silver kneazle appeared and leapt onto Snape's desk. It sat, wrapping his tail around his paws.

"Well now," Snape said softly, reaching out his hand. The kneazle sniffed his hand then pushed his head under Snape's hand. Snape smiled, a small smile, then looked up at Freddie as the Patronus vanished.

"Congratulations," he said softly. "You won."

"W- oh. I suppose I did," she said slowly, smiling. She'd almost forgotten about their wager. "You thought you would win?"

"I did," he admitted. "But I am...proud of you. Your hard work and determination paid off."

"Mm-hm," she said, flushing with delight. "_And _this means my Animagus will be a kneazle. Well, _most likely _it'll be a kneazle. Dumbledore said Patronuses can change but Animagi-"

"You spoke to Dumbledore? When?"

She didn't bother responding, just dropped her Occlumency shield so he could enter her mind. He started with her memory of producing the Patronus at home, then fast-forwarded to her encounter with Dumbledore. He reviewed the exchange thoroughly before he withdrew.

"Good," he said, sounding relieved. "Very good."

"My Occlumency is flawless," she said a little smugly.

"It is. I am proud of you," he said with another small smile. "The continuation of our physical relationship depends on your ability to maintain the deception."

"I know," she said, leaning against his desk. "I am enjoying myself far too much to fail you now."

"As am I," he said softly, looking down her shirt then up at her face.

"...Can we go home now?" she asked, smiling. "I believe I have a debt to collect."

"I need to finish this," he said, tapping the papers on his desk. "Go home and wait for me."

She sighed and stood up.

"Hey, wait. _I _won our bet. I don't have to listen to you today," she said smugly, walking around his desk. She pushed his parchments aside and hopped up on his desk, facing him. His eyes traveled up her pale legs then up to her smirking face.

"Within the walls of this castle, you answer to me, Miss Gray," he said in a soft, dangerous tone. "Bet or no bet. Now...get your ass off my desk."

"Language, Professor," she taunted, wishing she'd worn a skirt.

He grabbed her legs and pulled her off the desk forcefully.

"Go," he said threateningly and she couldn't suppress a shiver of fear at his tone but it was fear laced with arousal.

"Yes sir," she said, quickly skirting around his desk.

"Wait," he said and she turned around hopefully. "You can use the fireplace to floo home. Avoid the rain."

"I thought you liked me wet?" she teased.

He stood, narrowing his eyes at her.

"You are awfully cheeky today, Miss Gray. You are treading into dangerous territory."

"Sorry sir. I don't know what's gotten into me," she admitted sheepishly.

_I'm still riding the high from finally mastering the Patronus Charm, _she thought. Snape took a small jar from the mantle over the fireplace and opened it to reveal the glittering green floo powder.

"Go," he said, offering it to her. "I will join you when I finish."

"How long do you think you'll be?" she asked, taking a handful.

"I will be there when I am finished," he said tightly.

"Fine," she said with a dramatic sigh then grinned wickedly. "You might want to bring an Invigoration Draught. Something to keep you going while I have my way with you."

She tossed the floo powder into the hearth and stepped in before he could scold her.

"Spinner's End," she said clearly and she was whisked away.


	90. Chapter 90

#

Freddie went upstairs to her room, thinking about what she was going to do with Snape when he got home. She hadn't actually planned anything. She'd pretty much forgotten about the bet, she'd been more focused on learning to produce a Patronus. But she'd won.

_And now we're going to have a night where _I'm _in control, _she thought.

She'd gotten used to Snape being in control of her, she was more than happy to do whatever he said. He was the dominant one. It came natural to him, just like being submissive came natural to her. He was her professor, she was his student. It was only natural.

_So what am I going to do with him? _She wondered.

She sat on the edge of her bed, pondering. She could do whatever she wanted. She thought about her fantasies – of him taking her on his desk in the classroom or in his office.

_I probably can't get him to do that though, not at school, _she thought. _As good as it would be. Maybe that should've been my wager. _

She chuckled to herself and thought about her other fantasies, which included him tying her up and fucking her senseless.

_But that doesn't work if I'm the one in control. And tying him up isn't particularly appealing to me. Okay, so what else? This is a role reversal, so I have to treat him like he treats me. No touching without permission, that's a given. What else? He likes to embarrass me. _

She shuddered and shook her head. The thought of embarrassing him or even trying to was truly unpleasant.

_I guess I'm not as sadistic as he is. So what else..._

She decided to take a shower, figuring it would help her think but then she paused in the doorway.

_ I can get him to take a shower with me! _She thought with a grin. _I can wash his hair with my shampoo, soap him up, touch him as much as I want. That sounds good. _

She thought about changing clothes.

_Should I put on some of my lingerie? Should I put it on now or after we shower?_

She decided to go ahead and put it on now. She went over to her dresser and went through her clothes. She put on her black silk chemise and picked through her underwear drawer. After a minute she decided to just go without.

_He'll like that, _she thought as she closed the drawer. _Although this is supposed to be about what _I _like, what I want. _

She cleaned up her room while she waited for Snape, wondering how long he would be. He probably wasn't thrilled with the idea of her being in charge, maybe he was stalling. She made up her bed and put the picture of her and Daniel in the drawer. He'd mentioned before that he didn't like the reminder of how young she was.

She got some candles and lit them around the room, opting for candlelight instead of the harsh electrical lamp. When she finished that, Snape still wasn't home so she decided to go downstairs to wait for him. She'd gotten all the books on Animagi that Flourish and Blotts had to offer, during her trip to Diagon Alley with Amelia. She selected one of those and took it downstairs with her to read while she waited.

She was sitting in Snape's armchair when the flames in the fireplace turned green. She looked up from her book as he stepped out of the hearth.

"Hey," she greeted, closing her book and setting it on the arm of the chair. He nodded briefly, his dark eyes roaming her body through the translucent negligee.

"You're not wearing underwear," he observed, approaching her.

"Nope," she said, standing up from the chair. She'd been a little uncomfortable at first but she'd been reading for more than an hour and she'd gotten used to the feeling.

Snape reached out to touch her but she knocked his hand away.

"No touching," she taunted, grinning at him. He furrowed his brow.

"I am not going to enjoy this," he muttered.

"Yes you will," she assured him. She placed her hand flat against his chest then stood on her tiptoes to kiss him. He returned the kiss enthusiastically but as he deepened it he put his arms around her. She pulled back from the kiss and looked up at him. His pupils were dilated, his dark eyes full of lust.

"I've been thinking about what I want to do to you, ever since I got home," she said.

"It looked to me as though you were reading," he responded.

"Do you know," she said, snaking her arms around him. "How difficult it is to concentrate on reading when all I can think about is you, your cock?"

"I do."

"What I _really _want is for you to bend me over your desk, in your office, and fuck me senseless."

"Winifred, I-"

"Shut up," she said, her cheeks flushing as she said the words. "I know. I know we can't, I just thought I would tell you what I've been imagining..."

"That is all I have been able to think about since you left my office two hours ago," he admitted in a soft growl, trailing his hands down the thin material covering her back. "When I saw you sitting on my desk..."

"Did you want to do it? Did you want to _fuck _me on your desk, Professor?" she prompted and he squeezed her ass in response.

"Mm I could _fuck _you on the couch," he said, trying to steer her towards the couch but she dug in her heels.

"Um, no," she said lightly. "I don't think so. We're going upstairs."

"Ah, well, I can fuck you on the bed," he said, trying to lead her to the stairs.

"No," she said, breaking free of his grasp. "We're not going to the bedroom. _We_...are going to take a shower."

"A shower," he repeated.

"Mm-hm. Follow me," she said, starting up the stairs.

She glanced over her shoulder to make sure he was following her. He was but he didn't look enthusiastic. She chuckled softly and paused briefly as they passed the photographs hanging on the wall.

"You were a cute child," she said, touching the frame of one of the photos, straightening it. He made a face but said nothing.

"I wish I could've known you then," she mused. "What were you like as a teenager?"

"Is this really how you want to spend your evening?" he asked in his bored tone.

"We will spend it however I see fit," she replied coolly, mimicking his tone just a bit. "Come."

He followed her the rest of the way up the stairs. Freddie entered the bathroom and turned on the shower. When she turned around to face him he was undoing the buttons of his shirt.

"Wait," she said firmly, approaching him. "Allow me."

He dropped his arms to his sides and Freddie began to unbutton his shirt slowly. When she'd finished with the buttons she pulled his shirt off and tossed it aside. She ran her hands across his chest, running her fingers lightly through his chest hair.

She moved her hands up to his face and angled his head down so she could kiss his lips. He responded to the kiss, trying to deepen it but she pulled away.

"Patience," she teased and he let out a 'humph'. Smirking she lowered her hands to his belt and undid it. She slid the belt from the loops and tossed it in the direction of his shirt. She unbuttoned his pants and let them fall, along with his boxers. His cock sprang free, the head already glistening with pre-cum. She caressed him gently with one hand and felt his cock throb.

"In due time," she said playfully, pretty sure he'd used that exact same phrase with her before. He growled softly and kicked off his shoes as he stepped out of his pants.

"You are enjoying this," he said flatly.

"You're not?" she asked innocently, slipping the chemise off her shoulders and letting it fall to the floor.

"Not yet," he said, his eyes locked on her chest.

Freddie chuckled and stepped under the spray of water. She let the hot water run over her body, soaking her hair. Snape stood outside, watching her, until she grabbed his hand and pulled him in with her.

She stepped back, making room for him. She positioned him under the spray of water and put one hand on his shoulder to keep her balance as she wet his hair.

"Turn around," she instructed. "I want to wash your hair."

He let out a low hmm but turned around. She grabbed her shampoo from the shelf inside the shower. She squirted a dot into her palm and turned back to him. That's when she noticed his back.

She'd seen the scars before of course but she'd never had a chance to really look at them. Thick white scars that crossed his back. Old wounds. She wondered what could have caused them.

_Was it a spell? _She wondered. _That would explain why they never healed. Or maybe it happened when he was a child?His father was violent, abusive. Maybe his mother couldn't heal them..._

She shook her head, not wanting to think about it. She knew he wouldn't want her to think about it, he certainly wouldn't want to talk about it. She kissed his shoulder, the warm water flowing down his back from the shower head to her lips.

She smiled against his skin then pulled away. She lathered his hair with the lavender shampoo, then turned him around.

"Tilt your head back so I can rinse your hair," she instructed and he obeyed. His cock was still fully erect and it brushed against her as she stood on tiptoe to rinse his hair.

She was reaching for the bottle of conditioner when she slipped in the water. She banged her knee against the side of the tub but he caught her and pulled her back up.

"Damn," she swore, rubbing her knee.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Just slipped," she said. He pulled her close and kissed her and for a minute she let him.

"Mm," she said, breaking the kiss. "I'm not done with you yet."

He let out a frustrated noise and turned around so she could condition his hair.

"Don't slip," he said snidely. "I might not catch you next time."

"You won't?" she said in a feigned hurt tone. "You'd let me fall?"

"No I wouldn't," he admitted. "I will always catch you."


	91. Chapter 91

#

When Freddie finished washing his hair, she washed him with her body wash. The scent of eucalyptus filled the bathroom as she washed his back, then his chest. She slid her soapy hands down to his cock and he let out a hiss.

Smiling, she got down on her knees in front of him. Her knee ached as she knelt on the hard tile but she ignored it. She slid her hands along his shaft then washed his balls gently. She moved back slightly so the spray of water could rinse him clean.

He reached down with one hand and stroked her head. Her black hair was plastered to her skull as the water ran down her head and back.

"Suck it," he hissed.

"Hmm," she said, running her lips along his shaft then pulling away. "I don't think so."

"Evil. Evil witch," he growled. "I hate you."

"You love me," she teased, taking him in her hand again and he gasped.

_Did I really just say that? _She thought, alarmed. _I didn't mean to say that._

She began to stroke his cock, hoping to distract him from her slip up. He gasped again as she flicked her tongue over the slit in the head of his cock.

"_Winifred_," he hissed.

"Do you want to cum on my face?" she asked, looking up at him, blinking through the spray of water.

"I _want _you to suck me," he growled.

"Right, right. Okay, um...no. Cum on my face," she said, trying to sound commanding. He clicked his tongue at her, looking down with a smirk.

_If he's not going to do what I say, then I'll make him, _she thought determinedly.

She increased her pace, stroking him faster. The water made a slick, obscene sound as she jerked him off. She heard him gasping then he grunted and she closed her eyes as he erupted on her face.

Ashe felt his hot cum mix with the spray of water and wash down her face onto her chest. She wiped her face with the back of her hand then stood up, careful so she didn't fall. She turned towards the spray of the water, rinsing off her face, then turned back to him.

"Now," she said, grabbing the bottle of body wash. "You can do me."

"I _will _do you," he growled, not taking the bottle but grabbing her wrist. He pulled her flush against him and kissed her hungrily.

"Hey," she said sharply, pulling away. "No."

He exhaled slowly then released her. He took the body wash from her, squirted it into his hands, then began to soap her up...starting with her breasts.

She smiled as he fondled her, squeezing her breasts. Her nipples hardened as he flicked them with his thumbs. He nudged her back under the shower spray and when the soap was rinsed off he lowered his mouth to her breast.

She gasped and put her arm around his neck. He chuckled and sucked her pert nipple into his mouth. He rasped it with his teeth, sending electric shocks through her. She felt his cock hardening again against her thigh. She pressed herself against him but she lost her footing and slipped again. She was saved by her arm around his neck and his hands on her waist.

"Maybe we should get out of the shower now," she giggled.

'Are you asking or telling?" he asked, lowering his mouth to kiss her shoulder.

"Let's get out," she said decisively.

She turned around and bent over to turn the water off. He grabbed her hips and pressed himself against her. She could feel his cock getting harder against her ass. She rubbed herself against him teasingly, then straightened up.

"Come on," she sad, stepping out of the shower. The bathroom was thick with steam as she grabbed a towel off the rack to dry herself off. She was about to wrap the towel around herself when he stole it from her.

"Hey!" she protested and he smirked at her as he toweled off. She grabbed the towel, trying to snatch it back, but he held on tight. She pulled him towards her and gave him a passionate kiss, distracting him long enough so that she could snatch the towel away and run out of the bathroom.

"Catch me if you can," she called over her shoulder.

She was just through the threshold of her bedroom when he caught up with her. She squealed as he grabbed her up and carried her to the bed. She giggled as he threw her on the bed then he pounced on her. He kissed her so hard that for a minute she forgot she was supposed to be the one in control of things. He grabbed her wrists and pinned her hands above her head.

He was kissing the spot on her neck that made her quiver when she realized what was happened.

"H-hey," she said, squirming beneath him. "This isn't how things are supposed to go. I'm supposed to be in control."

"Mm. You're not very good at it," he said, using his body to keep her pinned in place.

"Well you're not playing fair," she said, biting back a moan as he nipped the straining tendons in her neck.

"I do not play fair," he growled softly. "It may have escaped your notice, little girl, but I am not a good man."

"I'm not so sure-" she began but was cut off as he got up. He grabbed her legs hard and pulled her to the edge of the bed. Without prelude he yanked her thighs apart and thrust his cock into her roughly.

It might have hurt if she hadn't already been aroused. She let out a yelp of surprise as he began to thrust into her roughly, his grip on her thighs so hard that it hurt, his fingernails digging into her skin.

She whimpered as he fucked her hard and fast, not giving her time to even get close before he was cumming inside her. When he was spent he pulled out and flopped down beside her on his back, breathing hard.

She pushed herself up on one arm and looked down at him, frowning slightly. His eyes were closed but as his breathing became more even he opened one eye.

"What?" he asked gruffly.

She snorted indignantly and climbed on top of him, straddling his waist.

"We are going to do this _my _way," she said stubbornly. "Even if it means I have to tie you to the damned bed!"

He looked surprised a moment, then a smirk curled across his lips.

"That will not be necessary," he said.

"Good," she said shortly. She leaned down to kiss him, putting her hands on either side of his face. She kissed him hungrily and slid her hands into his wet hair, threading her fingers through it then closing her hands into fists. She felt him gasp into the kiss but she didn't stop kissing him.

There was a burning desire between her legs now and she was subconsciously pressing her wet center down against his abdomen as they kissed. He had cum twice now and she hadn't even once. The thought annoyed her.

_This is supposed to be _my _night in control. I should be having multiple orgasms, not -_

She broke the kiss when she felt his hands on her hips.

"I don't think so," she said, grabbing his hands. She tried to pin his hands above his head but he resisted. She settled with pinning them to his sides.

She moved back down his body but was disappointed to find he wasn't hard.

"You're going to fuck me until _I _cum," she said in an almost threatening tone. She felt his cock give a small twitch but that was all.

"I cannot get hard again so soon after-"

"Shut up," she said sternly and she felt her face flush as he arched one eyebrow, looking up at her. She released his hands. "Don't move." She wiggled down his body until she was straddling his thighs instead, right above his knees. "I'll _make _you," she said, taking his limp cock in both hands. She stroked him a moment. He was slick with their combined juices from where he had taken her so roughly, and her hands glided over his skin easily.

She lowered her head to his cock and began to lick him with short, quick movements of her tongue. She enjoyed every twitch and throb she felt go through him as he got harder and harder, until she found herself licking the length of his fully erect shaft.

Satisfied, she moved back up. When he reflexively reached for her hips again she grabbed his hands, pushed them down and pinned them beneath her knees.

"Don't make me tie your hands," she warned.

The annoyed look on his face vanished the instant she impaled herself on his cock. She saw his mouth open but no sound came out. After that she was more focused on herself, on chasing that feeling that was building up deep in her lower abdomen until the feeling exploded, rocking her body with intense pleasure until finally she rolled off of him.

Breathing hard she watched Snape rub his right wrist where she'd been kneeling maybe a little too hard. She wanted to apologize if she'd hurt him but she couldn't catch her breath to form the words.

_You didn't hurt me, little witch, _said his voice in her head and with that glimpse into his mind she saw just how hard her was working to not take control of the situation. How bad he wanted to hold her down and fuck her senseless. Or tie her spread-eagle to the bed. Flashes in his mind of the dozens of ways he could have her, including a vision of him ravaging her on his desk at Hogwarts, followed by another of her choking on his cock while he sat in his chair, one hand on his desk, the other buried in her dark hair. It was enough for her to want him inside her again – _Now_.

She raised her head and saw his cock pointing straight up to the ceiling, glistening in the candlelight. He hadn't cum that time.

_Oh goodie, _she thought, grinning as she picked herself up off the mattress and climbed on top of him again...


	92. Chapter 92

#

They spent the rest of the night having sex, napping intermittently when they got too tired to go anymore. Freddie lost count of the number of orgasms she'd had. After her last one, when they finished together, Snape took her in his arms and kissed her forehead. The sun was coming up, sending light in through the curtains, but they were both too tired to move.

"Thank you," Freddie said softly, her face buried in his chest. "I know it wasn't easy for you, not being in control."

"Mm," he responded, then, after a moment. "I still enjoyed myself."

"At least a dozen or so times," she joked. He chuckled weakly and rested his chin on top of her head.

"I was going to go to the castle this morning. I have work that needs to be done, but..." he exhaled slowly. "I think I'll stay here with you a little longer."

"I need to sleep," she said. "I don't think I can go anymore. My whole body hurts...in a good way."

"I know," he chuckled. "I meant stay here and sleep."

"Sounds good," she yawned and nuzzled into his chest. Her eyelids felt heavy and her body was tired, but her brain was stuck on what he had said earlier. "Severus?"

He made a tired, questioning noise that wasn't a word.

"You know, I don't think you're a bad man."

He tightened his arms around her and she felt his chest rise and fall as he took a deep breath.

"You have no idea," he said softly. "None at all."


	93. Chapter 93

#

As August passed Snape spent an increasing amount of time at Hogwarts, working on schedules and lesson plans and who knows what else. Freddie started waking up early with him, just so they could spend a little more time together. Usually breakfast and a quickie – not always in that order – then he left for work and she went back to sleep for an hour or two.

The second week in August they were eating breakfast in the kitchen. She'd gotten up and made scrambled eggs, bacon and toast while Snape showered. She knew better than to make his tea for him – she'd done it before and been told she 'couldn't make a decent cup of tea if her life depended on it'. He was too picky, so she let him brew his own tea.

He was putting the kettle on when an owl tapped at the window.

"Will you get the paper?" he asked, not looking up from the stove.

"Yep," she said, pushing back from the table. She took a bit of toast with her to the window to feed the owl. She opened the window and took the morning paper and an envelope from a sleek-looking black bird.

"Thank you," she said to the bird, giving him the crust of the toast. The owl hooted gratefully then flew away. Freddie closed the window and turned around to find Snape watching her, probably looking at her butt when her nightgown rode up.

"You have a letter," she said, smiling at him.

"Hmm," he said, taking it from her. "Who would be writing to me?"

"Maybe Dumbledore?" she suggested, going to sit back at the table.

She checked out the _Morning Prophet _as she ate. Snape finished making his tea then joined her at the table. She watched over the top of the paper as he opened the envelope and read the letter. He said nothing but folded the parchment and put it in his pocket.

"Well?" she prompted. "Who was it?"

"You are nosy," he said, sipping his tea.

"And you are brooding and secretive," she said. "Come on, tell me."

"It was Lucius. Inviting me to dinner tomorrow evening."

"_Malfoy_?"

"I do not know any other 'Lucius'," he answered dryly.

"Are you gonna go?" she asked curiously.

"Probably not. I would much rather be here, in bed, with you."

"We should go."

"_We?_" he asked, narrowing his eyes at her. "_You _are _definitely _not going."

"Why not? You said before you wanted him to know I am yours, your plaything. Here's your chance. I could wear my black dress," she said with a sly smile. "The one I wore on my birthday."

He didn't respond but ate his breakfast. Freddie continued reading the paper but glanced up at him periodically.

"The idea of showing you off is appealing," he said slowly. "But I am not sure it is a good idea."

"Well it could be a chance for me to practice my Occlumency," she suggested. "School starts back in two weeks, I need to be sure I can keep it up for long periods of time. Besides...I can be a very attractive dinner date. I know how to mind my manners."

"I will think about it," he said. "Are you finished with the newspaper?"

"Yeah, here," she said, handing it over.

#

When Snape got home that evening, Freddie was curled up in his armchair by the fireplace, reading. It was raining outside and the house had a slight chill in the air. He stepped out of the fireplace and she glanced up from her book.

"Do you know I have to hold a mandrake leaf in my mouth for a solid month?" she asked as he took off his cloak.

"What?" he asked, sitting down on the couch.

"To become an Animagus," she answered. "I have to hold a mandrake leaf in my mouth for a whole month – from one full moon to the next, then I have to brew a potion with it. And there's a spell I have to say every day at sunrise and sunset."

"Sounds complicated."

"How am I supposed to hold a leaf in my mouth for a month? I can't brush my teeth or kiss you for a whole month?"

"I don't think I would want to kiss you if you didn't brush your teeth for a month," he said with a smirk.

"When is the next full moon?"

"September 2nd."

"I'll have to walk around school with a leaf in my mouth."

"If you want to become an Animagus, yes."

"Totally worth it," she said, looking back to her book. She read for a few minutes before he spoke.

"We will have dinner with the Malfoys tomorrow evening," he said. "I sent Lucius a letter and let him know I would have a guest."

"Did you tell him it was me?" she asked curiously.

"No. I only said that I had a student staying with me, per Dumbledore's request, and that they would be accompanying me, if that was okay. He sent a note back that said 'the more the merrier'."

"Cool," she said. "I won't have to cook dinner. And I can get all dressed up for you. I actually went shopping today and I got a new dress. I think you'll like it."

"Oh? Where is it?"

"You can see it tomorrow," she said with a smile. "That way you can get the full effect. I think you'll be pleased."


	94. Chapter 94

#

The next evening Freddie started to get ready about an hour before she knew Snape would be home to get her. She put on her black lace underwear and bra and stood in the bathroom to do her makeup. She hadn't worn makeup in years, she'd always thought it was too much hassle, but tonight she wanted to go the extra mile. Snape wanted to show her off and she wanted to look her absolute best – beyond beautiful.

She'd gotten some makeup when she went shopping in the Muggle village. With a steady hand she applied black eyeliner. She put on shimmering sliver eye shadow, checked her reflection, then wiped it off and applied it lighter.

The lipstick she purchased was a matte raspberry color. She reapplied it four times before she was satisfied with the way it looked. She added mascara to her eyelashes last then smiled at her reflection, pleased.

She brushed her hair and stared at herself in the mirror. She made a face then hurried across to her room to get her wand from her bedside table. She walked back across the hall to the bathroom and used her wand to curl her hair.

When she was finished with her hair she left the bathroom, still in her underwear. She retrieved her new dress which she'd hidden in the hall closet and went to her room to put it on. It was a gorgeous gown with a black corseted lace bodice. The skirt was emerald-colored satin, that flared at the waist and had a slit up one side to her thigh.

She put on the cobra earrings Snape had given her, then searched through her things until she found what she was looking for. A teardrop emerald on a silver chain. Her aunt had given it to her for her 13th birthday, saying it had belonged to her mother. She had only worn it a few times. She wasn't sure she liked that it had belonged to her mother. But the emerald was the exact color of the dress and it seemed so Slytherin-y, so perfect.

She'd even gotten a special pair of shoes to go with her dress. As much as she loved the comfort and versatility of her black leather boots, a gown like this called for something _more_ – a pair of silver, strappy high heels.

She'd never liked heels. The first time she had tried to walk in a pair when she was young she'd broken her ankle. Anubis the house elf had repaired her ankle with a snap oh his fingers but she'd lost control of her magic and set the shoes on fire. She'd never bought another pair after that. Until now.

She spent the rest of the hour learning to walk in the heels. Once she was comfortable walking a straight line, she practiced on the stairs. She went up and down the stairs two dozen times before she was confident she'd gotten the hang of it.

She was in her room, dabbing honeysuckle perfume on her wrists, neck, and between her breasts when Snape called her name from downstairs. She grabbed the simple black purse that she'd gotten to carry her wand in then headed down the stairs slowly.

Snape was standing in front of the fireplace. He turned to face her as she came down the stairs.

"How do I look?" she asked, clasping her hands behind her back as she approached him.

"You are...absolutely stunning," he breathed. She flushed and he cupped her cheek gently and kissed her.

"Thank you," she said softly, smiling at him.

"You're wearing makeup," he said, tracing her bottom lip with his thumb. "I do not think I have ever seen you wear makeup."

"You haven't," she chuckled. "Before yesterday I didn't even own any. But I wanted to look my absolute best – I'm even wearing heels. It'll be a miracle if I don't break my neck before the night is over."

"I see. You got all dressed up for Lucius?"

"No," she scoffed, smacking his chest lightly. "For you, stupid. You said you wanted to show me off, so, I thought I'd give you something to show off."

"Ah. You are my trophy," he said, smiling slightly before he kissed her again.

"Mm. Or more like a present. One you get to unwrap later," she said coyly and when his eyes flashed hungrily she chuckled. "We should go, shouldn't we? It would be rude to be late."

"I suppose you are right," he said with a soft sigh. "It is somewhat chilly outside, you may want to grab your cloak."

"Okay. Be right back," she said, lifting the hem of her dress as she headed upstairs.

When she came back down she'd put on her black hooded cloak. Snape smiled slightly.

"Ready?" he asked, extending his arm.

"Ready," she replied. She took his arm and they Disapparated.

#

They appeared outside of a pair of impressive wrought-iron gates. Beyond the gates stretched a long gravel driveway with a yew hedge curving alongside it. At the end of the driveway Freddie could see an enormous manor house with towers. It was at least 5x bigger than her uncle's house.

"Fancy," she commented.

"Lucius prides himself on appearance," Snape replied.

Their arms linked together, they walked towards the gate. Freddie's heels crunched on the gravel and she leaned on him for support, hoping she wouldn't fall before they made it to the house.

"Are you going to tell him about us?" she asked curiously. "You said he's your best friend, isn't that what guys do? Talk about women?"

"Lucius and I do not talk about women – well, _I _do not talk about women. As for your question...I will not tell him outright, but there will be no need to maintain an illusion of a professional relationship."

"You want him to know I'm yours without having to tell him," she said with an understanding nod.

"Precisely."

The gates didn't open as they approached but Snape did not stop. They passed through the gates as if they were smoke.

"Whoa," Freddie said, glancing back over her shoulder at the seemingly solid gates.

"They _are _solid," Snape said. "But you would not have been able to pass through them if you weren't touching me... My Dark Mark allows me to pass through."

"Malfoy was a Death Eater?" she asked him. "I mean, I figured he was but I didn't want to ask."

"He is."

Freddie looked at the tall hedges on either side of the path. She could hear the sound of water running somewhere from an unseen fountain beyond the shrubbery.

"He's one of the ones who bought their way out I'm guessing," she said.

"This is not the place to discuss it," he said, squeezing her arm lightly.

There was a rustling in the shrub and Freddie jumped, reaching for her wand in her bag.

"It's fine," Snape said, catching her wrist. "Look."

Freddie watched as an albino peacock stuck its head out through the leaves. It emerged from the bush and fanned out its tail. Its luxurious feathers seemed to glow in the twilight.

"Wow," she said softly. "It almost looks like a Patronus."

"It is not. I am the only one who can produce a Patronus...the only Death Eater," he said quietly. Freddie glanced at him then the hedge rustled and she looked back to see three fluffy white chicks emerge.

"Babies!" she squealed delightedly, letting go of Snape's arm. She hurried over and squatted down next to the baby peacocks. She reached out to touch one, only for the adult to let out an unearthly noise and run at her. She threw her arms up and the peacock pecked her several times before Snape blasted it away. He pulled her to her feet and pulled her back towards the path.

"Bloody birds," he muttered. "Are you okay? You're bleeding."

"Yeah. Damn," she said, digging through her purse. She pulled out a small vial of dittany and uncorked it with her teeth.

"You brought dittany to a dinner party?" he asked, bemused, as she quickly tended to her wounds.

"Yeah. I bought this purse yesterday when I got my dress. I put an Undetectable Extension Charm on it. I have all kinds of stuff," she said, re-corking the vial and dropping it back in her bag.

"Hang on," he said, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket. He wet it with his mouth then used it to clean the remaining blood from her arms. "There. Good as new."

"Thank you," she said softly and he gave her a quick kiss before taking her arm again.

"Let's go, before you piss off another animal," he said with a smirk.

"Do you think she's okay?" she asked, glancing over her shoulder at the stunned peacock as they walked away.

"It will be fine. The spell will wear off shortly," he assured.

Freddie watched the baby birds circle their mother, peeping loudly.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"She will be fine, Winifred," he assured her.

"I should've known better than to try and touch the chicks. I've never seen a peacock before though. I didn't know they could be so aggressive."

"It's fine. Come on," he said, giving her arm a light squeeze as they reached the door.

The door had an ornate silver knocker in the shape of a serpent. Snape knocked and a second later the door was opened by a grubby-looking house elf wearing a threadbare pillowcase.

"Master Snape," the elf said. "Welcome. Cans I take your cloak?"

Snape unfastened his cloak and handed it to the elf.

"May Dobby take your cloak, miss?" the elf asked Freddie.

"Of course. Nice to meet you, Dobby. I'm Freddie. Freddie Gray."

"Allow me," Snape said, unfastening her cloak and sliding it gently from her shoulders. She smiled at him as his hands lingered over his exposed skin before he tossed her cloak at Dobby.

"Master Malfoy is in the-"

"Severus!" said a booming voice as Lucius came out a door at the end of the hallway. "Welcome. And this must be – Miss Gray? What a pleasant surprise."

Snape kept an arm around her as they met Lucius halfway up the hall. He took Freddie's hand and kissed it in greeting.

"So, this is who you're staying with," he said, looking between the two of them.

"Yes sir. It was Dumbledore's idea. I thought I'd be able to stay at the castle over the summer but the headmaster had other plans."

"I see. I must say you look lovely this evening," he said, his icy blue eyes roaming her body. "I am so glad you could join us."

Snape tightened his grip on her and Freddie pressed herself against him.

"Thank you, Mr Malfoy," she said politely. "I'm glad to be here."

Lucius' eyes narrowed slightly but his lips curled into a smile that was more of a sneer.

"Call me Lucius. Dobby!" he barked.

"Yes Master Malfoy?" the elf squeaked fearfully.

"Put our guests cloaks in the cloakroom and get them a drink. Severus – scotch?"

"Thank you," he said with a curt nod.

"And for you, Winifred?" Lucius asked.

"Freddie," she said a bit harshly.

"I beg your pardon?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"My name is Freddie. I only let Severus call me Winifred."

"I see. Well, Freddie – what can my house elf get you to drink?"

"Scotch will be fine. Thank you," she said, looking to Dobby. The house elf nodded and disappeared with a crack.

"Excellent," Lucius said with a laugh. "A woman who can drink like a man. You are a rare breed, Miss Gray. Come. Narcissa is waiting for us in the dining room."

Snape took Freddie's arm as they followed him down the hall. The walls were lined with photographs of well-dressed men and women. The portrait's eyes followed them as they walked.

They followed Lucius through a door at the end of the hallway. The door let into a grand dining room, with ceilings at least 30 feet high. There were two magnificent chandeliers that hung over a long, ornate table that could sit at least two dozen people.

Lucius' wife Narcissa sat at one end of the table nearest a large fireplace.

"Severus," she said, standing up from the table. She wore a black velvet dress with flares sleeves. She was pretty but nowhere near as pretty as Freddie.

"Narcissa, it is good to see you," Snape said, taking her hand and kissing it. Freddie felt a stab of jealousy. She knew it was irrational and she shook it off.

"And who do we have here?" she asked, looking to Freddie. "Is this your girlfriend, Severus?"

"This is Winifred Gray, she is my apprentice at Hogwarts. She is staying with me this summer due to...extenuating circumstances."

"I remember you – you're Cecil and Millicent's girl," Narcissa said, shaking her hand.

"They're my aunt and uncle," Freddie said with a nod.

"That's right. Well it's good to see you again, I'm glad you could join us, Winifred."

"Freddie," she corrected. "Call me Freddie, please."

"Have a seat, Freddie," Lucius said, going to sit at the head of the table. "Where is that damned house elf? Dobby!"

Dobby appeared in a crack, carrying a tray with two glasses of scotch and two glasses of wine. Snape pulled out Freddie's chair for her then sat next to her once she was seated. He put his hand on her thigh under the table and they shared a smile as Dobby served their drinks.

"Professor Snape," said a voice and they looked up to see a small blonde boy in the doorway.

"Draco," Lucius said in a dangerous tone. "You are supposed to be upstairs."

"I just wanted to say hello to Professor Snape," the boy said dejectedly.

"Go. Now."

"Is Draco not joining us for dinner?" Snape inquired.

"No, he is grounded. He stole his mother's wand and was hexing rabbits in the garden."

"I just wanted to practice," Draco protested.

"You _stole _your mother's wand. Now go," Lucius said sternly. "Or it's you that'll be hexed."

Draco scurried from the room and Lucius chuckled, picking up his glass of wine.


	95. Chapter 95

#

Freddie felt a bit like a child again sitting at the dinner table with the adults as the house elf served them a 5 course meal. She focused on minding her manners – chewing slowly, with her mouth closed, using the correct utensil out of the host of silverware laid out before them.

She feigned interest as Lucius told her the history of his house and land. How his ancestor Armand Malfoy had arrived in Britain with William the Conqueror. He had helped King William the first vanquish a number of enemies and assassinated other potential heirs, ensuring William's place on the throne. In return he was given a prime piece of land where the Malfoy family had lived for the past ten centuries.

She made short but polite remarks throughout his story. Eventually the conversation shifted from history to Hogwarts. Lucius' son Draco would be starting school next year and Lucius wanted to be sure Snape would take him under his wing.

"Of course," Snape said, taking a sip of his scotch. "I will do my best to keep an eye on him, ensure he stays out of trouble."

"He is very talented," Lucius bragged. "We have been teaching him the basics, letting him use our wands. He's doing quite well but he's impatient. I spoke with the rest of the school board, tried to get him enrolled earlier, but the headmaster put his foot down. Honestly, Severus, I don't know _how _you stand working for that crackpot old man!"

"Well someone has to keep an eye on the young Slytherins, ensure they are not corrupted with Dumbledore's nonsense," he answered smoothly.

"That's the truth," Lucius said, raising his wine glass in a toast. "They are lucky to have you."

"We certainly are," Freddie murmured with a smile. Snape smirked and squeezed her thigh lightly under the table.

"You should give some thought to reviving the Slug Club," Lucius said, swirling his wine thoughtfully. "It would allow you to keep a close watch on our young purebloods, help them out."

"I simply do not have the time, my friend," Snape said. "The work alone keeps me fairly busy – the grading, brewing potions for the Hospital Wing, and of course I'm training Winifred for the upcoming Potions Championship."

"Oh I'm sure," Lucius said, smirking, his eyes on Freddie.

"Besides – my students know they can come to me if they need assistance," Snape said.

_I doubt any of them would, _Freddie thought, amused. _They're too scared of him. _

"What's a Slug Club?" she asked aloud, curious.

"Ah it was before your time, Miss Gray," Lucius said. "Before Severus was Potions Master, our Head of House was a man named Horace Slughorn. He had a club – The Slug Club – made up of students he hand picked himself. Those who he liked the best – the brightest and oftentimes the most well-connected students. He held lavish parties and get-togethers with us, sometimes teaching us things that weren't part of the regular curriculum. Everyone knew that if you were a member you were practically guaranteed to become a successful member of Wizarding Society."

"He had a knack for weeding them out," Snape nodded in agreement.

"From just Slytherin House?" Freddie asked curiously.

"No, the Slug Club was not exclusive," Snape said.

"They _were _mostly Slytherin students," Lucius said. "Unless they were well-connected, had famous parents."

"Or were exceptionally talented," Snape added.

"Like the Gryffindor girl who was in your year, Severus," Lucius said. "The Mudblood who was so good at potions."

Snape removed his hand from Freddie's thigh and he picked up his glass. He took a long drink of scotch while Lucius continued.

"You know who I'm talking about, the redhead who ended up marrying James Potter."

"Lily Evans," Narcissa provided and Snape swallowed heavily. He nodded briefly but didn't speak. Freddie watched him curiously but he avoided her gaze.

"I suppose that's one advantage for Draco waiting another year," Lucius said. "He'll be in the same class as Harry Potter. Can you imagine? _My _son will be friends with the Boy Who Lived."

"That's why we're keeping him here, rather than sending him off to Durmstrang," Narcissa said but Freddie was no longer listening.

_Lily Evans, Snape's Lily, _she realized. _Snape's Lily is Harry Potter's mother!_

_#_

After dinner, Lucius invited Freddie for a walk around the gardens.

"I have a number of plant species you may find interesting, things you won't see around your Hogwarts greenhouses," he said, smiling at her in a way she found creepy.

"Only if Severus can come too," she said brightly, smiling back at him.

"Of course," Lucius said, his eyes glittering coldly. "The more the merrier. Narcissa?"

"No, I think I'm going to check on Draco and then turn in for the night," she said, kissing her husband's cheek.

"Dobby!" Lucius said loudly and the house elf scurried over from where he'd been lurking nearby. "Refill our drinks then clean up. We're going for a walk."

"Yes Master," Dobby said in a trembling voice. He refilled Lucius' wine then brought a bottle of scotch to refill Snape and Freddie's cups. His furry hands were trembling and he accidentally sloshed scotch on Freddie's dress.

"Dobby is sorry, Miss! So sorry!" the elf cried in distress.

"It's okay," Freddie assured him but Lucius stood up from the table. He flew towards them and snatched Dobby up by the dirty pillowcase he wore.

"You useless rodent!" he shouted and threw the house elf across the room.

"Don't-" Freddie protested, but Snape put his hand on her shoulder and shook his head.

"Get back to the kitchen where you belong," Lucius snarled, crossing the room to his Dobby with his cane.

Freddie stood up, anger flaring, but Snape stood as well.

_Don't, _said his voice in her head. _Unless you want his anger directed at you._

_ I don't care! _She responded silently. _I can take him. _

_ No you cannot, Winifred. Trust me, _he said forcefully. _Remain calm. _

Freddie took a deep breath and cleared her mind, using her Occlumency to calm herself. When he was done abusing Dobby, Lucius turned back to them.

"Let's go, shall we," he said cheerily.

Snape squeezed her shoulder lightly then took her arm. As they followed Lucius out of the room Freddie mouthed 'I'm sorry' to the house elf who was still cowering in the corner.

They left the house and stepped out into the garden that was on the other side of the hedges they'd passed on the way in. Night had fallen but the garden was lit with twinkling fairy lights.

Snape kept his arm linked with hers as they walked through the garden. She was only half-listening to Lucius rambling about the exotic plants in his garden.

"I have the absolute best gardener. Rowan Ashwood. He lives in a cottage on the far edge of our property. He and his wife are currently traveling abroad in Brazil, searching for new species to add to my collection," he said grandly.

Freddie moved her hand down Snape's arm and gently twined her fingers with his. He glanced down at her and smirked slightly. Her stomach fluttered pleasantly as he squeezed her hand.

"Ah, I think you'll like this, Freddie," Lucius said, beckoning to them. They followed him over to a small flowerbed surrounded with a wrought iron fence. Inside were a number of flowers, all of which were glowing.

"Oh wow," Freddie said softly.

"I thought these would impress you," Lucius said, opening the gate. "They're infused with magic that makes them fluorescent. They also last much longer than ordinary daisies."

"They're magnificent," she said, kneeling down to get a closer look. Snape let go of her hand. He crouched and plucked one of the flowers. He twirled the stem between his thumb and forefinger. When Freddie stood he cupped her cheek briefly then placed the flower in her hair. She smiled up at him and, for just a moment, he smiled back.

"Severus, who knew you had such a soft side?" Lucius said teasingly.

Snape scowled and dropped his hand. Freddie felt a flicked of annoyance.

"Oh nothing about him is soft," Freddie said without really thinking.

"Winifred," Snape scolded but Lucius laughed.

"Quite a mouth your girl has on her, eh, Severus?"

"She does indeed," he replied, pinching Freddie's arm discreetly.

She scowled at both of them and Lucius chuckled.

"I have a grove of Wiggentrees, would you like to see?" Lucius asked her. "I know their bark and leaves can be used in potions."

"Yeah, I'd love to see," she said, following him out of the gate.

"You know Severus," Lucius said as they walked. "You should take Draco on as your apprentice next year."

"I only took Winifred on during her sixth year," he said. "And only because she showed remarkable skill that most students lack. She has progressed far beyond her classmates and possesses a natural talent for potions that rivals even my own."

Freddie flushed with pride and Snape squeezed her arm lightly.

"And she's nice to look at," Lucius said, glancing back at her with a smirk. Snape pulled her possessively closer, putting his arm around her waist.

"If Draco shows even half the promise in Potions as Winifred, I will consider it," Snape said smoothly.

Lucius continued to talk about his son but Freddie wasn't listening. Snape's hand was moving along her waist, across her lower back.

_I want to get you out of this dress, _said his voice in her head. His hand traveled to her ass.

_Here in the garden? _She asked teasingly. _I'm not sure how Lucius would feel about that._

_ Not here, _he responded, squeezing her ass. She could feel the jealousy and possessiveness he was feeling in his mind.

_I'm not jealous, _he denied.

_You are. You can't lie to me in my own head. _

He let out a soft growl and squeezed harder.

_Do you know what I am going to do to you when we get home?_

Images flashed through her head. Images of her choking on his cock, tears streaming down her face. Then fucking her from behind as she grabbed the arm of the couch, crying out his name.

She stumbled and nearly fell but Snape held her up.

"Damn heels," she muttered aloud.

Then images of him fucking her on the bed, wearing nothing but the strappy silver heels. Her mouth went dry and she grinned up at him.

_We need to get out of here, _she thought.

_Agreed, _he responded.

Freddie wasn't listening to Lucius at all as they walked through the grove of Wiggentrees, talking about how old they were, what ancestor had planted them. She was too busy thinking of what would happen when they got home.

"Lucius, my friend, it is getting late," Snape said finally, sliding his hand up Freddie's back. "I should get Winifred home."

"Oh of course," Lucius said. "You sly old dog. Shall I walk you to the gate?"

"That will not be necessary, thank you," Snape said, linking his arm with Freddie's. "Thank you for dinner."

"Any time," he said grandly. "Especially if you bring this one with you."

He winked at Freddie and she bit her tongue, forcing herself to smile.

"Thank you for having us, Mr Malfoy," she said politely. "I had a good time."

"Any time," he said again. "Enjoy the rest of your evening."

"Oh we will," she said with a grin. Snape pinched her again but Lucius just laughed.

"Goodnight Severus. Miss Gray," he said with a nod, then he turned and walked away back towards the house.

Freddie tugged Snape towards the driveway. He took a few steps then stopped.

"What-" she began but he silenced her with a kiss. She melted into him and he deepend the kiss, thrusting his tongue into her mouth as he steered her back. She stumbled slightly in her heels until her back hit a tree. He pinned her there then slid his hands to her waist. Still kissing her, he started to pull her dress up.

"Mm. Wait," she said, breaking the kiss but he just moved his mouth to her neck. "W-ah-wait-what if Malfoy comes back?"

"He wont," he murmured and she gasped as he nipped her throat. She wrapped her arms around him and he bunched her dress up around her waist.

"Are you sure-" she asked but he covered her mouth with his, kissing her until she couldn't think straight. She felt him undo his pants. He slid her panties aside and she let out a whimper as he entered her. She held himself still inside of her a moment and groaned softly, breaking the kiss. He buried his face in the crook of her neck and inhaled deeply.

"Mm," he said on a slow exhaled. She clung to him tighter as he began to thrust into her. The bark of the tree scratched the exposed skin of her back and shoulders as he fucked her, giving her a taste of pain with the pleasure rapidly building inside of her.

Her breathing came in ragged gasps as she got closer.

"C-can I-" she gasped into her ear.

"Cum," he grunted, his voice muffled by her hair as his face was still buried in her shoulder. "Cum for me, my little witch. _Mine_."

She let out a cry of delight as stars exploded behind her eyes. Pleasure rocked her to her core and he kept fucking her, fasted now, his arms around her pining her against the tree.

"Yes," she whimpered, digging his nails into his back. "Yours. All yours. I'm yours."

He let out a guttural groan and stilled his movements. She felt his cock swell inside of her and jets of hot cum erupted from him. He held her there against the tree a moment then withdrew. She pulled her dress down as he adjusted his pants.

"Let's go," he said, breathing hard. "We can't Disapparate until we're outside the gate and I want – I _need _to take you home."

"Yes," she said as he let her down, her legs trembling. "Yes, let's go."

They hurried across the grounds together, Freddie stumbling in her heels. She was fighting back giggles and even Snape was smiling at her, the expression looking odd on his face. She could feel his cum leaking out into her underwear and it made her feel flushed and giddy.

They passed through the gates together and Freddie glanced back over her shoulder, half-convinced that Lucius had been watching them the whole time. Snape pulled her into his embrace and kissed her.

"You make me feel young," he murmured, then kissed her again as they Disapparated.

The moment they appeared in her bedroom, he ripped her dress off – literally. He took the front of her dress in both hands and tore the fabric of the bodice.

"Hey! My dress!" she protested. "You can't just-"

"I'll repair it later," he hissed then kissed her again. He clawed the fabric away from her body. Once she was free he scooped her up and carried her to the bed.


	96. Chapter 96

**Author's Note: I'm sorry I'm not updating as frequently as I used to and that my posts are few and far between. At this point I don't know when, if ever, I'll finish. For the moment I'm still plowing away at it even if it's slow going. Between the pandemic and my Depression, it's been hard. But I promise as long as I keep writing, I'll keep updating for you guys who have stuck with me so long. **

**Be safe everyone!**

**~RPP**

#

On the morning of September 1st Freddie woke up early with Snape. They had breakfast together then went back to bed to make the most of their last few hours together. Freddie couldn't help but feel a little sad as she lay there in his arms afterwards. She lay her head on his chest and looked up at him.

"So we can come back during the holidays?" she murmured softly, hating the weakness in her voice. She was worried he would say no, that he would change his mind and think it was too risky.

"Mm-hm," he said, stroking her hair absently with one hand. "And some weekends. Probably not as frequently as you would like – and not as frequently as I would like either, unfortunately. But we have to be cautious."

"Yeah," she said with a soft sigh. "I know."

"Hey," he said, cupping her face and tilting her chin up to meet his gaze. "If I had it my way, I'd have you in my bed every night. But we cannot risk getting caught. I cannot lose my job."

"But you hate your job," she teased.

"I do not," he said. "Well, not always. Teaching you has been...particularly satisfying."

She giggled as he pulled her on top of him and he kissed her.

"Tell me what a pleasure I am to teach," she said, putting her knees on either side of his hips. "How brilliant I am. How teaching me has changed your life."

"Cocky little witch," he said, grabbing her waist. She wiggled her hips, feeling his cock stir beneath her, and she chuckled. "You _are _brilliant." He slid his hands up her body. "Brilliant and beautiful."

"You're a lucky man," she said smugly, leaning forward to kiss him.

#

When Freddie's watch beeped at 10:30 they were still laying tangled together in her bed, arms and legs and bed sheets entwined. Freddie glanced at her watch and groaned.

"I have to go," she whined. "The train leaves at 11, I can't miss it...unless you want to take me with you."

"I cannot," he said, squeezing her tightly. "I could get in trouble."

"I know," she sighed and reluctantly started to rise. He grabbed her and pulled her back down in the bed, wrapping his arms and legs around her. He kissed her forehead and held her tightly. She didn't move or speak for several minutes. She didn't want this to end. She knew it would be days, possibly weeks, before they could be together like this again. It felt so good laying in his arms. Content. Peaceful. Happy. Like nothing else in the world mattered.

She tried to burn that feeling into her brain. Tried to memorize the way his arms felt around her. The weight of his leg on top of hers, his other leg wedged in between. His warm breath tickling her ear with every exhale.

"I really need to go," she said mournfully.

"I know," he said, but made no move to release her. She tried to get up but his arms held her in place. She looked at her watch. 10:40.

She sighed, then wiggled and squirmed free of his legs. She ducked her head from under his arm. Her feet were on the floor when he pulled her back into bed.

"No," he said and kissed her.

Freddie giggled and he gave her another quick kiss. She smiled at him and tried to get up again. She sat up in bed and he sat up too. But then he pushed her back down on the mattress to kiss her again.

"No," he said.

"Severus, I have to go," she giggled, squirming beneath him.

"No," he said, kissing her lips lightly.

"The train is going to leave without me...Severus...I really have to go."

"No," he repeated. He kissed her lips again, then her nose, each eyelid, then pressed a long, lingering kiss to her forehead. "...Now you can go."

She slipped out of bed and retrieved her school robes. She'd packed everything last night. Snape sat on the edge of the bed, buttoning up his short. He stood and put his pants on while Freddie shoved her feet into her boots. She checked her watch – 10:50.

"I have to go now," she said, giving him a quick hug. He grabbed her arm and pulled her back to him. He put his hands on her waist, then slid them down her thighs, then back up under her schoolgirl skirt.

"This is not going to be easy," he said, hooking his thumb under the waistband of her panties.

"Not in the least," she agreed and she forced herself to pull away from him. She grabbed her trunk and smiled sadly at him. "I'll see you at school."

He sighed softly and nodded.

"Goodbye Winifred. For now."

#

Freddie Apparated directly onto the platform and ran to get on the train with the rest of the stragglers. She heaved her trunk on behind her and set about trying to find a compartment as the train started to move.

At first she was looking for Amelia but after checking several compartments she didn't find her.

_Probably somewhere snogging Brian, _she thought with some amusement.

She checked a few more compartments and was pleasantly surprised to find one that was empty. Usually you couldn't find an empty one unless you got there early. She dragged her trunk in and closed the door.

She stretchered out on the seat and pulled Hemlock out of her pocket. She was tired and deliciously sore all over. She thought about getting a book out of her trunk to read but she was too tired to even roll over. She put her arm over her eyes to block out the sunshine and let the rocking of the train lull her to sleep.

She napped most of the way to Hogwarts. A few times younger students opened the compartment door – looking for their friends or a place to sit, she didn't know or care – then they quickly scampered off when she opened her eyes to glare at them.

She didn't even wake up when the witch pushing the snack cart stopped by. She just waved her off and rolled over to face the seat and dozed back off.

She woke to a commotion outside of her compartment. She sat up and realized the train had stopped. She stood to peek out the window to see they had arrived at the train station in Hogsmeade. She stretched and picked up Hemlock. She shrunk him and put him in her pocket. She left the compartment, leaving her trunk behind. It would be transported back to the castle, by magic or house elves she wasn't exactly sure.

She made her way off the train to the carriages. She was approaching one to climb in when she saw Geck, surrounded by Ravenclaw boys. He glared at her and opened his mouth to say something.

"Freddie!" called a voice behind her.

She turned to see Amelia and Brian walked towards her, their hands clasped together. The carriage containing the Ravenclaws took off and Freddie went to meet Amelia, trying to ignore the heavy feeling in her heart. She missed Daniel.

_I'm glad this is my last year, _she thought to herself as Amelia let go of Brian's hand to give her a hug.

"How was the rest of your summer?" her friend asked brightly.

"Good," she said truthfully. "Really good. How about you two?"

"Great," she said, beaming.

"Awesome," Brian added. "I almost wish we didn't have to come back."

"I know the feeling," Freddie chuckled.

"Look, there's Christine, we can ride up with her and Maggie," Amelia said, waving at her cousin.

Freddie followed them over and climbed into the carriage. She made small talk for the first minute or two, then sat mostly silent while her friends discussed their summers. As the carriages drew closer to the castle she could smell food cooking and her stomach growled loudly. She was surprised to find herself so hungry but then she _had _missed lunch.

As she walked into the Great Hall with her housemates, Freddie's gaze went to the staff table. Snape was there. Their eyes met for the briefest of moments then he turned his attention back to his conversation with Dumbledore. She exhaled slowly then turned away to sit down at the Slytherin table.


	97. Chapter 97

Chapter 97

Freddie sat at the Slytherin table and forced herself not to look back up at her Head of House. She listened to her friends talk about their summers. Made polite conversation and tried not to think about the wonderful morning she'd spent in bed with Snape.

When the Sorting started she focused on that. She watched the kids put on the Sorting Hat one at a time and get sorted into the four houses.

_They seem so small, _she thought to herself. _Daniel and I were never that small. _

She used her Occlumency to block out the feelings of sadness that threatened to overwhelm her so that when the feast started she was feeling sort of numb as she piled her plate with food and began to eat.

When the feast was over and Dumbledore started his speech, she glanced up...then quickly looked away. Because Snape was there, sitting beside him, his face tilted up to watch the Headmaster, seeming engrossed in his words.

She wondered if he was really listening or if he was just as internally distracted as she was. She looked at the table instead, which was now clear of food. She ran her fingernail along a seam in the wood and tried to think of something, anything else. She thought about her plans for becoming an Animagus. She needed to write them out because tomorrow night was the full moon and she would have to get started.

Her thoughts were interrupted when her classmates began pushing back from the table. Her head jerked up and she saw that Dumbledore's speech had ended and students were leaving the Great Hall. She glanced up at the staff table and Snape's dark eyes met hers for a moment.

"Come on Freddie," Amelia said from beside her. "Time for bed."

She was the first to look away and she got up from the table. When she looked up again he was no longer looking her way. She sighed softly and followed her housemates out of the Great Hall.

#

Freddie lay in bed that night, unable to sleep. She was tired, she was full of food, but she couldn't fall asleep. She couldn't get comfortable. She hadn't slept alone in she didn't know how many weeks. Snape's clinging grasp which had first seemed so uncomfortable...now she didn't know how to sleep without it. Without him.

She had Hemlock on her chest, her arms around the plush animal. She tossed and turned for hours. Eventually she decided sleep was impossible and dragged herself into a sitting position.

_I shouldn't have napped on the train, _she thought, using her wand to light the lantern on her bedside table. She had the curtains drawn around three-quarters of her bed, the side that faced the window under the lake open.

She got up and tiptoed to her trunk at the end of her bed. She opened it and by the green glow of the lake found her book on Animagi. She got a piece of parchment and a self-inking quill, then sat cross-legged on the bed. By the flickering light of the lantern she began to write out her instructions for the next month.

Hold a single mandrake leaf in mouth from one full moon to the next.

At the end of the month, under the light of the full moon, place the leaf into a phial.

Add dew that hasn't been exposed to human touch or sunlight for 7 days.

Add one of my own hairs, and the chrysalis of a Death's Head moth.

Keep the mixture hidden, out of sunlight, until the next lightning storm.

Every day while waiting for the storm, at sunrise and sunset, place the tip of wand over heart and repeat 'Amato, Animo, Animato, Animagus'.

When lightning appears, go to the place where the phial is hidden. Repeat the incantation then drink the potion, which should be blood-red in color.

You will experience a fiery pain, then feel an intense double heartbeat. The image of the animal will appear in your mind. You must feel no fear.

Do not forget to register at the Ministry of Magic.

She studied the Animagus process until she felt like she couldn't keep her eyes open anymore. She put her book aside and extinguished the lantern. She pulled the blanket over herself, hugged Hemlock to her chest, and closed her eyes.

But she didn't fall asleep.

She groaned in frustration and rubbed her eyes.

"This is ridiculous," she muttered to herself.

She tossed and turned some more until she couldn't take it anymore. She wrenched the blanket off and sat up. She shrugged on her robe, the silky black one, and took a few books from her trunk. She carried them into the Common Room and sat on the couch near the fireplace. If she wasn't going to sleep, she could at least get a head start on her studying.

#

Freddie was still on the couch, dozing slightly, with an open book in her lap when students started walking through the Common Room, heading up to breakfast. She sat up and rubbed her eyes tiredly.

"Morning Freddie!" said Amelia's cheerful voice as the girl approached her. "Did you sleep out here?"

"Morning," she said, running a hand through her own hair. "Yes. No. I couldn't sleep, so I was studying."

"Classes haven't even started yet, why on Earth would you study?"

"I like to be ahead of the game," she said, closing the book that was on her lap. She stood up and stretched, her joints popping as she did.

"Jeez you're old – you sound like my grandpa when he stretches!"

"Heh," Freddie chuckled lightly. "I'm going to get dressed. See you at breakfast."

"I'll save you a seat," Amelia promised before hurrying to join Brian who was coming out of the boy's dormitory.

When Freddie entered the Great Hall ten minutes later her eyes immediately went to the staff table, but Snape wasn't there yet.

_Hope he doesn't miss breakfast, _she thought as she headed for the Slytherin table, _He's always so grumpy when he misses breakfast._

Amelia waved her over and moved her book bag so Freddie could sit next to her. Brian was on Amelia's other side, saving Freddie from having to make idle conversation. She piled her plate with pancakes, eggs, and sausage. She poured a cup of breakfast tea and drank it down quickly, hoping the caffeine would help her feel more alert. She refilled her cup before starting on her pile of food.

She was halfway done with breakfast when Amelia nudged her.

"Look, here comes the schedules," she said. "I hope I don't have Herbology first thing."

Freddie swallowed the toast she had in her mouth and looked up. She hadn't even noticed him enter the hall but there was Snape, making his way down the table, handing out schedules.

Was it her imagination or did he look tired too? She didn't have much time to ponder it as he approached them.

"Miss Gray," he said in a voice that sent a shiver through her. He handed her the parchment with her schedule written on it. "I have spoken to Headmaster Dumbledore and he agrees – one of your study periods each day will be reserved for private lessons with me, in order to help you prepare for the upcoming Potions Championship Tournament. I will see you for your first lesson this afternoon."

"Uh, yes sir. Thank you," she said, surprised. He didn't acknowledge her but continued down the table.

"Private lessons with Snape?" Brian said, looking past Amelia at her. "That sounds downright terrifying."

"What's this about a Potions tournament?" Amelia asked.

Freddie quickly explained the tournament to them.

"Do you think you have a shot?" Brian asked interestedly, chewing on a piece of bacon. Freddie opened her mouth to retort but Amelia interrupted her.

"Of course she'll win, dummy!" she said, smacking her boyfriend's arm then turning to beam at Freddie. "She's the Potions Princess."


	98. Chapter 98

#

Freddie's first class of the day was Transfiguration. She usually enjoyed Transfiguration but after the sleepless night she'd had she found herself nodding off several times during McGonagall's start of term speech. It was more of a stern lecture than a speech, stressing the importance of studying and end of year exams that would determine the course of their future, their careers.

They spent the last half hour of the class period attempting to turn lumps of coal into diamonds. Freddie was so tired she nodded off once – her wand slipped and her piece of coal broke into pieces. She jerked her head up and looked around, but she was sitting at the back of class and no one had noticed. She repaired the coal and kept trying.

When the ball rang signaling the end of class it gave her a start. She quickly copied down her homework assignment with everyone else. She shoved her books into her bag and stood to go.

"Miss Gray, a word," said McGonagall in her usual stern tone.

Freddie stopped short and waited for the room to empty. Had McGonagall noticed her nodding off? Had she done something wrong? Did she suspect about her relationship with Snape?

Freddie quickly cleared her mind. She clasped her hands behind her back and employed her Occlumency while she waited for the last student to leave.

"So," Professor McGonagall said, walking over to her desk. "Severus told me you plan on attempting the Animagus process."

"Oh," Freddie said, surprised. "Yes ma'am."

"I wrote down some useful tips for you," she said, picking up a piece of parchment from her desk. "Don't be disheartened if you don't get it right the first time. It took me three months to complete the process. I made several mistakes along the way but it is truly worth the effort. My door is always open if you have any questions."

"Thank you, Professor," Freddie said, clutching the parchment in her hand.

"Best of luck, Miss Gray."

#

Freddie had her first Potions class right before lunch and she couldn't have been more excited. She may have been tired but she would never be too tired for Potions.

_Or too tired for him_, she reflected silently as she entered the Potions classroom. She was the first to arrive and she made her way to the front of the classroom, taking her usual seat at the table directly in front of Snape's desk. He hadn't arrived yet and for a moment she looked at his desk, caught up in the fantasy she had all too often – of him taking her on his desk.

She shook it off and sat down as the door opened. She turned her head to see Maggie Hicks enter the room. Her Slytherin classmate came and took the seat next to her, looking rather glum.

"Where is everyone?" Freddie inquired as they got their books out.

"Christine and Alexander didn't make the cut," she answered.

"Seriously? What about the Ravenclaws? And that Greene girl?"

"Dunno. God, I hope it's not just the two of us," she groaned, putting her head down on her book.

"It might not be so bad," Freddie reasoned. "At least Snape's got a soft spot for Slytherins."

"For you maybe," Maggie said and Freddie felt her cheeks grow warm but Maggie still had her head down.

"He favors _all _of us," she protested.

"Tell that to Christine and Alexander."

Freddie shrugged slightly, thinking that if they couldn't make the grades, they couldn't make the grades. If it was one thing Snape didn't play around with it was Potions classwork.

_Still, _she thought to herself, _it might be harder to focus on _not _thinking about him if it's just me and Maggie. I don't want to risk letting something slip. _

The door opened again and for a split second Freddie was glad to see Richard Perkins and Leo Carroll had made the cut for NEWT-level Potions. Then the two Ravenclaw boys glared at her before turning away. She scowled at their backs as they took the seats farthest from her and Maggie but still at the front of the class.

Freddie watched the door, waiting to see if the last student from the previous year would walk in. She didn't care much for the Hufflepuff girl, Daisy Greene, but having a buffer between her and the Ravenclaws wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

The door opened, banging loudly on the wall, and they all sat up straight as Snape strode into the room, his black robes billowing around him.

"So," he said, his drawling voice sending a shiver through her. "You have no doubt noticed that that our class size has dwindled. Three of your dim-witted classmates failed to perform to my expectations during the end of term exams and therefore were not permitted to continue on to NEWT level. Only four of you remain. This class is the most elite, most challenging, most demanding that you will face this year. This class will make or break you."

Freddie listened raptly to Snape's version of McGonagall's speech. She drank in every word but she also noticed the bags under his eyes and the faint note of weariness in his voice that she was sure no one else could hear. No one who hadn't spent the last few weeks – the last several years really – getting to know every nuance of his voice.

_I'm guessing he slept about as well as I did last night, _she thought wistfully. _Although it's good to know I'm not the only one who feels this way. _

Snape's eyes passed over her for the briefest of moments as he explained that today they would be brewing one of the most powerful potions known to mankind.

_Are you in my head? _She wondered but received no reply.

"Can anyone tell me," Snape said as he swept along the front of the class. "What Amortentia is?"

Both the Ravenclaw boys raised their hands but Freddie kept hers down. She didn't trust her voice to explain the love potion, not while he was looking at her with those dark eyes. Maggie elbowed her slightly and gave her a pointed look.

"Mr Perkins?" Snape said in a bored tone.

"Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world. It can be recognized by its mother of pearl sheen and steam that rises from the cauldron in spirals. It also smells differently to each individual, depending on what scents attract them the most."

"A textbook answer," Snape sneered. "But accurate. So-" He flicked his wand and the recipe appeared on the blackboard. Freddie cocked her head curiously. He'd learned a new trick apparently. "The recipe can be found here or on page 57 of your textbook. You have two and a half hours, at which point your potion should be lavender in color. At the end of class I will place a stasis spell on your cauldrons and we will continue working on them tomorrow. Begin."

Freddie stood with the rest of her classmates and went to the supply cupboard for ingredients. She had brewed the Amortentia before of course, just last year, but she didn't mind doing it again. In fact she looked forward to it. She could still vividly recall the way the scent of the potion made her feel, warm and almost giddy.

Freddie was reaching for the ashwinder eggs when Perkins brushed past her, taking the opportunity to elbow her hard in the ribs. She inhaled sharply and glanced to Snape but he hadn't noticed. He was sitting at his desk, writing something with a black eagle quill.

"Potions princess," Carroll muttered as he walked past, as if it were an insult. Freddie held her head high and continued gathering her ingredients. She returned to her desk with a smile on her face, knowing it would piss them off more to know they weren't getting to her.

Midway through the lesson Snape was sweeping along the row of desks, making his usual disparaging remarks about her classmates work.

_But not mine_, she thought smugly, adding chopped daisy roots to her cauldron.

"You need another teaspoon of rose thorns, Miss Gray," he said, leaning over her cauldron. She opened her mouth to retort but caught herself just in time. She couldn't contradict him, not here in front of her classmates – but she knew damn well she didn't need to add more rose thorns!

As Snape straightened up Freddie felt him slip something into the pocket of her robes. She cast a furtive glance at her classmates but they were all focused on their work. She waited until Snape had returned to his desk before casually reaching her hand in her pocket. She fingered a small vial of potion and a scrap of parchment.

Curious and unwilling to wait until the end of class, she raised her hand.

"Professor Snape may I be excused a moment? I need to visit the restroom."

He gave a grunt and Freddie quickly placed a stasis spell on her cauldron. She quickly left the classroom and hurried down the corridor to the nearest bathroom.

After making sure she was alone, she leaned against the sink and emptied her pocket. The small vial contained a potion she immediately recognized as an Invigoration Draught. She unfolded the scrap of parchment which read 'Drink this. -S' in Snape's familiar neat handwriting.

Smiling to herself, she uncorked the vial and turned to face the mirror.

_I suppose he knows I didn't sleep well, _she thought, touching the bags under her eyes. Her skin also looked a little paler than usual. She gulped down the potion and watched the color return to her cheeks as she felt a renewed sense of energy creep through her body.

_Much better, _she thought, sticking the empty bottle back in her pocket. She felt sharper than she had all morning. _Severus Snape, I love you. _


	99. Chapter 99

_#_

At the end of the lesson Freddie wished she could stay and talk to Snape but she knew she couldn't. She settled on turning to give him a smile and a wink as she followed the last student out of the classroom.

"I'll see you after lunch for your first private lesson, Miss Gray," he said, a sparkle in his dark eyes as he stood up from his desk to place a stasis spell on their potions.

"Yes sir," she said, feeling the hair on the back of her neck stand up as she turned to go, feeling his eyes on her as she walked away.

Freddie found Amelia and Brian at the Slytherin table and joined them for lunch. They exchanged stories about their morning classes. Freddie recounted the events of her Potions class, including the Ravenclaw boys' behavior.

"Yeah, reckon it's gonna be just like last year," Amelia said. "Pierce and Hamilton kept flicking dung at me when Professor Sprout wasn't looking."

"I got them back though," Brian said proudly. "Tongue-Tying Curse right before we entered the Great Hall. He didn't even see where it came from."

"The best thing you can do is not let them get to you. Don't let them infringe on our happiness. Just keep smiling and eventually they'll get bored," Freddie assured them.

"I'm not gonna just sit back and let em flick dung at my girlfriend!" Brian protested through a mouthful of food, his ears red, but Freddie had stopped listening. She was thinking about what she'd just said. Was she really happy? She glanced up at the staff table where Snape was sipping from a goblet, then she looked quickly back to her plate. She _was _happy...but when she thought about it, thought about _why _the Ravenclaws were so hostile – because of Daniel – she felt guilty. How could she be happy when her best friend was gone. Missing. Possibly dead. And his disappearance was part of the reason she and Snape had grown so close.

She pushed her food around her plate until she saw Snape leave the Great Hall. She waited a couple of minutes, then got her bag.

"I'm going to get ready for my next class," she said to her friends. "I'll see you at dinner."

"Later Freddie," Amelia said.

She made her way back to the dungeons, trying to put the negative thoughts out of her mind. She stopped by the Potions classroom, but he wasn't there. Smiling faintly she continued down the hall to his office and knocked.

"Come in, Miss Gray," said his silky smooth voice, and she pushed the door open to find him standing before his desk. "You're early. Lunch isn't over for another ten minutes."

"Well you know me, I'm an over-achiever," she replied with a weak smile. He paused, scrutinizing her.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," she said quickly and immediately regretted it. His eyes narrowed and she cut him off before he could say it. "That was a lie, I know. I'm sorry. I just...don't want to talk about it. Not right now. Okay?"

He considered this a moment, then inclined his head.

"Very well," he said. "We can get started."

"In the classroom, or-?"

"In my lab," he said, opening the entrance to his private lab.

Freddie followed him inside and felt a sense of calm wash over her. Whether it was being in the lab for the first time in months or being alone in a room with Snape...she found herself smiling for real.

"So," she said, dumping her bag on the workstation. "What happened to keeping our distance at school? Now private lessons, in your lab?"

"Ah, it was Dumbledore's idea."

"_Really_?" she asked, intrigued.

_Does Dumbledore really trust him _that _much or does he suspect something between us...and is actively encouraging it?_

"The Headmaster feels that, since you will be representing Hogwarts in an international Potions competition you could benefit from more of my private tutelage," he said, his eyes lingering on her in a way that made her shiver – and also made her wet. "So, since you are the first student to represent Hogwarts in over a decade, the Headmaster requested that one of your study periods each day be spent with me, to help prepare you."

"Sounds good to me," she said with a smile.

"I will not go easy on you," he warned. "This will be challenging."

"I would expect nothing less," she said, smirking. "Bring it on."

"Very well," he said, giving a small smile. "Sit."

Freddie sat on the stool and faced him attentively, her legs crossed. She watched his eyes travel up her legs and linger on the edge of her schoolgirl skirt. She smoothed the edge of her skirt and looked up at him with an innocent smile.

He exhaled ever so softly and took a few steps back.

"During the Potions Championship you will be faced with any number of challenges – obstacles you will have to brew potions to get through. Brews you will have to identify. Situations you will have to assess quickly and determine how to proceed. So," he said, pulling a piece of parchment from his pocket he began to read from it. "You encounter a man laying immobile across the path. You stop to examine him. He is pale and cold-"

"Draught of Living Death?" Freddie suggested. He arched an eyebrow and shook his head.

"I suggest you let me finish, Win- Miss Gray," he said sternly.

"Yes sir. Sorry," she said sheepishly.

He cleared his throat before continuing.

"Upon closer examination you notice white circular splotches on the man's skin. What would you do next?"

"Open his mouth to check for the scent of poison," she answered and he nodded.

"His tongue is stained red. His breathing is shallow and growing slower by the minute. You detect an earthy scent on his breath. How do you proceed?"

"Sounds like he was poisoned by Death Cap Draught, right?"

"What are the indicators?"

"The blood-red staining on the tongue, splotches on the skin, and the earthy scent, that's the smell of the Death Cap fungi, right?"

"Correct. Now, what would you do next?"

"I'd search for ingredients to concoct an antidote."

"Good. Do it," he said shortly.

"Yes sir," she said, hopping up from the stood and heading for the supply cupboard.

#

They didn't speak much once Freddie began working on her antidote – in fact, Snape left her more or less to her own devices, retreating to his outer office to work. He came in a few times to check her progress and one final time before the bell rang. He nodded approvingly over her cauldron before pulling out his wand to vanish the contents.

"Well done, Winifred. Excellent work," he said with the smallest of smiles. "Though I expected nothing less."

"I thought it was 'Miss Gray' while we're in class?" she said, teasingly.

"Cheeky little witch," he purred, stepping into her personal space but not touching her. She met his gaze evenly and thought she saw some of her own desire reflected there. How easy it would be to close the distance between them...

The bell rang at that moment and Freddie swore loudly.

"Language, _Miss Gray_," he said silkily. "Or I'll have to punish you."

She let out a low groan of desire and looked up at him.

"Go," he said finally, taking a step back and Freddie let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "Neither of us needs to be late for class."

"Right," she said, quickly gathering her things. She stopped in the doorway to look back at him. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," he repeated softly.


	100. Chapter 100

The rest of the day passed in a blur as Freddie felt the effects of the Invigoration Draught beginning to wear off. When she found herself nodding off over dinner, her hand falling into her potatoes, she told her friends she was going to bed.

She sat on the edge of the bed for a moment and checked the notes McGonagall had given her. She had her mandrake leaf waiting on her bedside table already. She folded it carefully as many time as she could, then tucked it between her lip and upper molars, per McGonagall's instructions. It wasn't too uncomfortable and she felt certain she shouldn't accidentally swallow it in her sleep.

She thought that, as exhausted as she was, she would fall asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. This, however, was _not _the case. She lay there, the curtains drawn around her bed, holding Hemlock in her arms. Every now and again she absently poked the mandrake leaf with her tongue. She listened to the sounds of her housemates coming to bed and she felt irritated. Exhausted and irritated. Hours passed and she tossed and turned, growing increasingly frustrated.

_What is _wrong _with me? _She thought, punching her pillow, then she let out a hollow chuckle. She knew exactly what was wrong with her. _I'm hung up on a boy. A man. But still...Daniel would laugh if he could see me now. He'd take the mickey out of me for sure. _

She smiled at Hemlock, thinking back to something that had happened in her fourth year.

She and Daniel were marching back towards the castle leaving the Quidditch pitch and a fifth year Slytherin boy named Draven Finn who was on the ground, clutching his face as huge warts erupted over his face.

"What'd you do that for?" Daniel asked her, sounding amused.

"I didn't do it on purpose," she said sourly. She'd lost control of her magic _again_. She hadn't even had her wand – they'd been flying, having a friendly Quidditch match with a handful of students, when Finn had gotten on her nerves.

"I know that," Daniel said. "But still – it was bloody brilliant. Think he'll rat on you?"

"Nah. He knows better," she said menacingly, glancing back over her shoulder.

"So what did he do? To piss you off?"

"He...he won't stop asking me out," she said, her face growing warm.

Daniel stopped short, howling with laughter, doubled over. She rounded back and knocked him in the head, just hard enough to make him yelp.

"What was that for?" he demanded, rubbing the back of his head.

"Don't laugh at me, Daniel Byrd. I don't want to go out with Finn – I don't want to go out with _anyone_."

"Why not? That's what girls do at our age, ya know? They date," he said practically. "Honestly a bit of snogging might help you take the edge off."

She shot him a disgusted look.

"What and end up like that?" she said, jerking her thumb at a crying Hufflepuff girl near the lake. They'd passed her on their way down to the pitch earlier and she'd been crying then too, surrounded by friends who crooned how she was 'better off without him' and 'boys are jerks'.

"It's amazing she has anything left in her to cry, she's been there for hours," Daniel observed.

"Yep. So _no, _no sir, you will _not _catch me all wrapped up in some boy. I have my career to think about."

"Your career? You're just a kid!"

"I've only got three years left to learn everything I can from Professor Snape, everything I can about Potions. I eat, sleep, and breathe Potions," she said, twirling dramatically, her arms outstretched. "Now _you _on the other hand..."

"What about me?"

"Seems you're the one who needs a bit of snogging."

"Wh- shut up!" he said, his ears turning scarlet.

"Maybe you could go cheer her up," she said, indicating the crying girl again. "Course if you start dating a Hufflepuff, I'm not sure we could be friends anymore."

"Shut it, Fred," he said, smacking her shoulder. "Let's go start on our Transfiguration homework before dinner."

Freddie smiled ruefully at the memory and rolled over in bed for the millionth time. She checked her watch. It was already after midnight.

She considered going down to Snape's office to ask for a Sleeping Draught. The thought of going down to his office, this late at night, knocking on his door and rousing him from his bed, made her smile. But she knew it wasn't a good idea.

_That is definitely not a good idea, _said Snape's voice in her head. She bolted upright so fast she nearly swallowed her mandrake leaf.

_You're in my head! _she thought, surprised, but pleasantly so. _You are in my head, aren't you? I'm not dreaming? Or hallucinating?_

_I am here, little girl._

_ Why? Not that I'm complaining, _she responded, settling back down on her pillow.

_ I cannot sleep. _

_ Me either. _

_ I know._

_ I miss you. _She felt silly and embarrassed to admit it but she didn't feel any judgment or derision from his mind.

_I know, _said his voice in her head.

She closed her eyes as her mind was flooded with images of him in his room, his bed in disarray, the sheets twisted around him. The green glow that lit his quarters was the same glow from the lake that bordered her bed. It was a mirror image of her own position in her bed, other than her arms wrapped around the stuffed kneazle.

_I've slept alone most of my life...then I let you into my bed and now, after just a few weeks..._ he thought, and even his voice in her head sounded tired.

_I can't sleep without you. _They had the same thought at the same time, and Freddie smiled sadly.

_Do you know what I would do if I were there? _He asked.

_I can think of a few things..._ she responded, smirking.

_Close your eyes. _

She did as told and the image that appeared in her mind was as if she hadn't closed her eyes at all. She could see the curtains around her bed, then saw Snape slip around the curtains and approach her bed. He touched her leg, running his hand along her exposed thigh. She could really feel his touch, the warmth of his skin on hers.

Startled, she opened her eyes, but she was alone.

_Keep your eyes shut, _he commanded. _You'll ruin it. _

_ Yes sir, _she said, immediately closing her eyes.

Then he was there again, pulling the blanket away from her body. He slid into bed next to her, pulling the blanket over them. Their clothes vanished and he wrapped his arms around her, throwing his leg over both of hers. He pulled her tight against him and she could feel the warmth of his body, even feel the rise and fall of his chest against her back.

_How are you doing this? _She wondered. _It feels so real. _

_I am a man of many talents, Winifred, _he responded, his breath tickling her ear. _It does not matter 'how'. Just relax. _His hand swept across the swell of her breast, his thumb teasing her nipple lightly, before coming to rest around her, just beneath her breasts. He seemed content just to hold her and she was grateful. She was exhausted and so was he, from what she could feel from their connected minds. _Sleep, my Winifred. Sleep and rest._

She murmured her assent. The last thing she felt was a soft kiss pressed beneath her ear as she drifted off, her mind still connected with his.


	101. Chapter 101

#

Freddie spent the next several nights in much the same way and every morning she woke alone – for he had never really been there – but she felt well rested and alert. She couldn't go home with Snape every night, but it was the next best thing.

They continued their private lessons daily. Each lesson presented Freddie with a new challenge and each day she figured it out – diagnosing various instances of poisoning and brewing the antidotes with relative ease.

On Friday afternoon, her private lesson was the last class on her schedule. She'd had a study period before that and she'd worked on her homework in the Common Room for most of the period. When her watch beeped at 15 til, she rolled up her parchment, closed her books, and carried them to her dormitory. She put anything that wasn't Potions related into her trunk and decided, after a moment of consideration, to put on a bit of makeup. Just a little shimmering silver eye shadow and a touch of black eyeliner. A light pink lip gloss. Then she brushed her hair out and braided it meticulously down her back. She dabbed on her honeysuckle perfume then was good to go.

With her bag slung over her shoulder she left the Slytherin Common Room and headed towards his office. _It's Friday, _she thought with a small smile as she walked down the torch-lit dungeon corridor. _I wonder if he'll take me home tomorrow? I know he said we had to be careful and we do but God...this has been the longest week ever. It's been so difficult to keep my distance, keep my hands to myself...and I'm not the only one having trouble._

She smiled a little wider as she remembered how yesterday he'd brushed up against her in the supply cupboard 'by accident' and she felt his cock harden against her ass. He'd quickly stepped back then returned to his office with a barely audible but clearly frustrated sigh.

Suddenly images filled her mind that definitely weren't hers. She saw herself pinned against a stone wall, his hands under the skirt of her school uniform. She stopped short and felt herself flush. She felt his smugness in her mind then received an image of him waiting for her in the Entrance Hall. Then he was gone from her mind.

Curious, she turned around and headed away from his office towards the Entrance Hall. Why would he be waiting for her there? Were they going somewhere? Was he taking her home? She shook her head slightly. Not now, not with one class period left. She knew better than to think he'd skive off a lesson. So it must be something to do with her Championship training.

She climbed the staircase up out of the dungeons and blinked in the bright afternoon sun that was streaming into the Entrance Hall, along with a flood of students chatting excitedly as they made their way to their last class of the day.

She spotted Snape standing to the right of the Grand Staircase, waiting for her. Their eyes met and she smiled briefly but of course his expression didn't change. He made a little lazy 'follow me' motion and started up the Grand Staircase. Intrigued, she crossed the sea of students to follow a few steps behind him.

They climbed staircase after staircase, ascending higher into the castle. Snape didn't speak except to snap at a group of Ravenclaw first years who were trying to un-stick the foot of a boy who'd gotten caught on one of the trick stairs. For a moment Freddie thought about stopping to help them but the dirty looks they threw at Snape's back, then at her as she passed, kept her at bay. They were Ravenclaws after all and it seemed even these scrawny kids knew who she was, had taken Geck's side no doubt, and didn't want anything to do with her.

Her fingers skimmed the banister as she continued up the stairs, fuming. She wished that, wherever Daniel was, he would come back. Come back and clear her name, and end this animosity between their houses. It seemed otherwise that it would never end. She wondered if, after she graduated, it would be forgotten. Slytherin and Ravenclaw houses had never been best friends but it was the house they got along with the most. There were more purebloods in Ravenclaw house than any other house besides Slytherin. Gryffindor had a few, but they were sworn enemies. And Hufflepuffs had always been considered laughable. For a moment she lost herself in the magnitude of what a rivalry with Ravenclaw meant for Slytherin house. How many friendships had been ruined, how many would never get a chance to form, because of her?

"Miss Gray," Snape said in a bored-sounding voice. She had fallen nearly half a staircase behind him and she hurried to catch up.

The higher they climbed the fewer students they saw. When Snape reached the 7th floor the bell rang loudly, echoing up through the stairs. Indeed all the students were gone now, having made their way to their classes.

When Freddie joined him on the 7th floor landing she was clutching a stitch in her side and breathing hard.

"Looks like you are out of shape, Miss Gray," he taunted lightly. Freddie scowled at him and straightened up.

"Where are we going?" she asked now that they were finally alone. "Shouldn't we be in the lab?"

"You'll see," he answered and beckoned her to follow him down the corridor.

Freddie followed him, brimming with curiosity, and it wasn't long before he stopped in front of an unremarkable slab of stone wall.

"What are we doing?" she asked. Snape shushed her and began pacing. She frowned at him then began looking around the corridor. Across from them was a tapestry of a wizard that looked like he was trying to teach trolls to tap dance. She was about to inspect it closer when she heard Snape say 'aha' softly. She turned to look at him -

-and found him standing in front of a stone door that had not been there a moment ago.

"Wh- where did that come from?" she asked, flabbergasted.

Snape smirked and opened the door. She quickly followed him inside and was shocked to find that they were standing in a garden. There were flowers and plants everywhere, and tall garden walls on every side. In the middle of the garden was a cauldron on a round stone plateau.

"What _is _this place?" Freddie asked in awe, looking around her.

"This," Snape said grandly. "Is the Room of Requirement. It is a rather unique room that I discovered in my third year, which presents whatever you need the most – in our case, a place for you to learn to prepare yourself for the Potions Championship. I'm surprised I did not think of it earlier, it is perfect. The perfect puzzle."

"Okay. So, what do I do?" she asked determinedly.

"It's a puzzle. Solve it," he said lightly. "I will return for you later. Good luck."

She watched him step back through the door and when he closed it, the door vanished.

"A puzzle," she said aloud. "Hmm..."

She put her bag down by the cauldron then began to walk around the garden. She looked at the plants, trying to match them up in her mind to figure out if they were a clue for what she was supposed to brew. But it didn't work. There were too many varieties, too many possibilities. He'd designed it that way she supposed.

She began to walk along the garden wall, through grass that was damp and springy. She was starting to fret a bit. What if she couldn't figure out what she was supposed to do? What if Snape came back in an hour and she was just standing there like an idiot?

She bit her lower lip nervously and ran her fingers against the rough brick of the wall. Maybe there was something hidden there, a message or a hidden room.

_A hidden room within a hidden room? _She thought dubiously.

Then she spotted it. She quickly knelt by the wall and pulled the grass away. It was a door. Small, about 8 inches high. She'd almost missed it.

She sat back on her heels a moment, wondering what she was supposed to do then it clicked. A Shrinking Solution.

"Brilliant," she said aloud, quickly getting to her feet. She ran back to her bag and pulled out Zygmunt Budge's Book of Potions. She flipped through it until she found the recipe, with the list of ingredients. Holding the book open with one hand she began to move around the garden, harvesting the plants she would need. Then she paused. She didn't _just _need plants. She also needed 5 hairy caterpillars and four leeches.

Thinking quickly she took the plants and the book back to the stone patio. She set them down then walked over to a patch of dandelions. She thought she remembered that woolly caterpillars liked dandelions. She crouched down and began searching. Sure enough she found a fuzzy black caterpillar munching on a dandelion leaf.

She used her wand to transfigure a nearby rock into a small bucket and put the caterpillar into it. It took her five minutes to find the caterpillars she needed. Then, toting the bucket, she began to walk around the garden again. She'd seen a small stream trickling under the wall. She found it again and pulled out her wand.

"Lumos," she said, lighting her wand tip. She held it out over the water and saw exactly what she was looking for – a dozen or so leeches, clinging to a rock at the bottom.

"_Accio _gloves," she said, flicking her wand towards her bag. Her dragonhide gloves zoomed towards her and she put them on before reaching into the water and pulling out the rock.

She made a face as she pulled four leeches off and dropped them into the bucket with the caterpillars. She was suddenly glad Snape wasn't there to see her. She wasn't usually squeamish but she'd never had to harvest leeches before. They were squirming, faceless blood-suckers and she shuddered as she dropped them into the pail.

She went back to the book and scanned the ingredients again. Her heart sank as she realized the last ingredient she needed was a rat spleen.

"A rat spleen?" she said. "Where am I gonna-"

Her eyes spotted movement at the far wall. A rat!

"_Accio _rat," she said and caught it in one hand. She held it carefully so it wouldn't bite her but kept her grip tight. It was squirming and squeaking, terrified, its black eyes bulging.

She felt a wave of nausea roll through her as she realized what she was going to have to do. She was going to have to kill it.

She had her Potions kit in her bag, she could use the silver dagger to slit it's throat. But as she thought of that, of the blood she knew would come, the hot sticky blood that would flow over her hands, like Daniel's blood all over her skin when she'd woken up in the Hospital Wing.

She began to shake and the rat bit her, hard. She yelped and it dropped to the ground with a soft thud. She swore and pulled out her wand again. She knew what she had to do but she'd never done it before, not even to a bug, not like this.

"_Avada Kedavra_," she said and she felt a chill go through her as her wand emit a flash of green light. The rat fell onto its side, unmoving, unmarked, and unequivocally dead. Even the grass around it had withered.

She approached it and prodded the rat with the toe of her boot. No blood.

_I killed it, _she thought. _With an Unforgivable Curse, I killed it. _

She wasn't sure how she felt about it. It was just a rat, but...she shook her head. There wasn't time to think about it now. She had a potion to brew.

#


	102. Chapter 102

**Author's Note: This chapter is dedicated to Imogen Cain who has left me so many reviews in the last few days. I want you to know how much they encourage me to keep writing. The first thing I do in the morning is check my email to see if I've got reviews and even things like 'Girl same!' make me smile and feel like this is all worth it! So thank you very much! 3**

**~RedPandaPrincess**

About an hour later Freddie was finished. She had her potion bottled and was standing before the tiny garden door with it in her hand. She'd used Zygmunt Budge's recipe, even though she knew Snape had his own recipe for the Shrinking Solution. She'd wracked her brain, berated herself because she couldn't remember his corrections. It wasn't one of the ones she had memorized. The Shrinking Solution, it wasn't a healing potion, it wasn't one she'd be brewing every day at St Mungo's.

She paused a moment. Next year that's where she would be. Spending her days in the basement of the wizarding hospital with the other interns, working for Hawkins. No more Hogwarts. No more hours spent in Snape's private Brewing Lab. And maybe no more Snape?

Her heart felt heavy in her chest and she shook her head, trying to get rid of the thoughts. She was determined not to worry about it until it happened. With a sigh she shouldered her bag and uncorked the bottle. She touched her tongue to the wad of mandrake leaf in the upper corner of her mouth, making sure it was secure. The last thing she wanted to do was swallow it, or have the leaf interact with the Shrinking Solution in some unexpected way.

She took a swallow and immediately felt her insides start to roll, her muscles started to contract. She squeezed her eyes shut until the pain and discomfort stopped. When she opened them she was standing at the door which was now the same height as she was.

"Well at least it worked," she said to herself, her voice coming out high-pitched and squeaky. She clamped a hand over her mouth, surprised to have emit such a sound.

She reached for the handle of the door and pushed it open. She couldn't see anything on the other side so she walked through cautiously – only to collide with something hard and black. A boot. She looked up – a swirl of black she didn't have time to process before a large pale hand closed around her middle and she was whisked upwards.

She let out a startled squeak as she found herself level with Snape's giant face.

"Well well well," he said in a low voice and he chuckled softly. "I could have some fun with you like this."

Freddie flushed and squirmed in his hand, feeling like the rat she had captured.

"Give me the antidote," she squeaked then covered her mouth at the sound. Snape laughed softly again and she scowled up at him.

"Adorable," he said.

"Come on, Severus, put me back right," she squeaked, feeling herself flush even deeper.

"Ask me nicely," he taunted.

"_Please_, Severus."

"Please _what_?" he said, his hot breathe ruffling her hair.

"Please _sir_," she said with a hint of annoyance.

Toying with her at home was one thing but here? Where anyone could walk down the corridor and see him holding an 8-inch Freddie in his hand?

As if he'd read her mind, he squatted and placed her back on the floor. Freddie looked around then looked up in time to see a massive drop of liquid raining down. It hit her, soaking her hair and robes, then she felt herself twisting and stretching until she stood before him, back to her normal size and not wet at all except for a small spot on her robes.

"That was so weird," she said, stretching out her muscles which were still twitching.

"Mm. You did well. You solved the puzzle. Let's go down to my office and you can tell me all about it."

"Yes sir."

#

When they reached his office Snape lit a fire in the hearth with his wand. Freddie dumped her bag on the floor and sat in her usual chair. She put her feet up on his desk and crossed her ankles. Her calf muscles were still twitching and her bones ached a bit.

"A side effect," Snape said as she leaned forward to rub her legs. "From shrinking and growing so rapidly. It will subside."

"I know," she said, smiling slightly as she noticed his eyes flick up her skirt.

"Do you need something for the pain?" he asked, pulling out his chair.

"No, I'm fine. A little sore but I've been hurt worse – by you," she said with a small smirk. "I'll be fine."

"Hm," he said, sitting down at his desk. "Get your feet off my desk. Noelle?"

The house elf appeared with a pop.

"Yes Master Snape? Oh! Mistress Grey. Welcomes back. Can Noelle brings you food? We is almost done with making dinner?"

"No, Noelle, we will be eating in the Great Hall. But could you bring us a pot of tea? Brew #19," Snape said.

"Please," Freddie added politely.

"Right away, Miss. Master Snape," the elf said with a bow, then she disappeared.

They waited in silence for Noelle to return. Snape sorted a stack of parchments on his desk. It wasn't long before Noelle returned with the tea set Freddie had gotten Snape for his birthday.

"Thank you, Noelle," Snape said and the elf grinned toothily at him before disappearing again.

Snape began to pour their tea and Freddie put her feet back up on his desk.

"Feet _off _my desk, Winifred," he said sternly.

"But my legs hurt," she said innocently.

"It is unsanitary. Here, drink this," he said, handing her a cup of tea. She put her feet on the floor and took the cup. She took a sip and felt the familiar warmth spread through her, ebbing the soreness away from her body. This was the tea he made for her at home, the one that had pain relieving properties.

"So," he said. "Your lesson."

She said nothing but felt him enter her mind. He rifled through her memories, watched how she'd handled the puzzle, how she'd gotten the ingredients she needed. She felt his surprise register when she killed the rat but she could also sense he was impressed.

When he reached the point where she bottled the finished potion he withdrew. He took a sip of his tea.

"It is okay that you could not recall my modifications to the recipe," he said calmly. "I did not expect you to."

"Yeah but I should've been able to," she complained. "There are a dozen others I have memorized."

"Healing potions I assume?"

"Yeah."

"Well that is understandable. You will not regularly be brewing Shrinking Solutions when you're working at St Mungos."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Trust me. You did _very _well," he said and took another sip of tea. "Did you enjoy your lesson?"

"It was...challenging," she said thoughtfully. "Very challenging."

"That _is _the point. This will prepare you, it is the _best _way to prepare you for the Potions Championship. What you faced today was one of the challenges I faced during my own championship."

"Really?" she said, intrigued.

"Yes. So trust me when I say – you did very well," he said again.

"Thank you," she said, grinning, and sipped some tea.

When the bell rang for dinner, they put their teacups down and Snape cleared the tray with his wand.

"Would you like to assist me in brewing a large batch of Dreamless Sleep for Madam Pomfrey after dinner?" he asked as they stood up.

"Seriously? Of course!" she declared. "You don't even have to ask.,"

He smirked and held the door open for her, then they headed up to the Great Hall for dinner.


	103. Chapter 103

#

Freddie ate dinner as quickly as possible, shoveling food into her mouth as fast as she could without disturbing the leaf tucked in the top corner of her mouth. She didn't even bother making small talk with Amelia who was watching her with a sort of bemused expression.

"Let me guess, you have a potion brewing?" she asked, grinning.

"Uh-huh," she responded through a mouthful of potatoes. She swallowed heavily and washed it down with a swig of juice.

"Later," she said to Amelia, grabbing her bag and heading out of the Great Hall.

Snape was still at the staff table but she headed back down to his office anyway. She unlocked the enchantment that guarded his door and went into the lab to start the prep work. She had found the recipe and gathered all the ingredients for Dreamless Sleep when Snape joined her 15 minutes later.

"Finally," she said, jumping up from the stool. "What took you so long?"

"I was _eating, _like a normal person. One with table manners," he said lightly. "We can't all unhinge our jaw like a snake and devour a whole ham in less than 30 seconds."

"I was in a hurry," she said, feeling her face flush and she smacked his arm playfully. His dark eyes flashed hungrily and for just a moment he smiled. Then he stepped away from her, his expression neutral.

"Start chopping the valerian roots and I'll light the cauldron," he said.

"Yes sir," she said obediently.

They worked in comfortable silence for a while, preparing ingredients and adding them to the cauldron in a seamless, synchronized flow.

When the cauldron had to stew for 15 minutes, Freddie decided to speak up, knowing she was pushing her luck.

"It's the weekend," she said casually.

"A very astute observation," he drawled and she rolled her eyes before continuing.

"I thought," she said, her eyes on the workstation in front of her. "Do you think...do you want to go back h- to your house?"

She'd almost said 'home' but caught herself in time. She had to stop thinking of Spinner's End as home. It wasn't her home, it was his.

He looked at her with a pained expression on his face, an expression she'd only seen once before when his cauldron had exploded in his bedroom.

"It's not a matter of want, Winifred. I want to," he said, his voice low as he stepped closer to her. "I _really _want to..." He was close enough to touch her now. "But we can't. Not this weekend. We have to-"

"Be careful," she finished with a sigh, looking down at her boots. "And keep our heads down. I know."

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, lifting his hand to touch her cheek. She closed her eyes, relishing the feel of his touch on her skin.

"Me too," she whispered.

She felt his lips press to her forehead ever so gently, for just a moment. She opened her eyes as he was pulling away. He let his hand linger a while longer then dropped it. They both sighed as he turned away.

"I'm sorry," he said again, not looking at her.

Freddie slid from the stool and put her hand on his arm.

"Let's finish our potion," she said, giving his arm a light squeeze.

"Right," he agreed. "Have you got the mallowsweet ready?"

"Yep," she said and returned to the workstation.

#

A few hours later they'd finished the potion. Freddie retrieved several large flasks from the supply closet and bottled the potion while Snape cleaned up the workstation.

"Do you want me to take these up to Madam Pomfrey?" she asked as she sealed the bottles.

"No, I will take them to her before breakfast. It's past curfew already," he said, drawing his wand and approaching the cauldron. "_Evanesco_."

The last dregs of the potion disappeared, leaving the pewter cauldron spotless.

"Oh," Freddie said, checking her watch. "I suppose it is pass curfew."

She glanced at the door but hesitated. She didn't want to leave yet. She looked back at Snape to find him watching her intensely.

"Tea, I think," he said softly, touching her elbow gently, leading her back out into his office. "Then you will return to your dormitory."

"Yes sir," she agreed, glad she didn't have to leave him quite yet.

She shed her outer robes and balled them up, shoving them into her bag as she did. She was left in her skirt and button up white shirt. She loosened her Slytherin necktie and flopped into her chair in front of Snape's desk.

"Noelle," Snape called as he sat. The elf appeared in a split second. "Brew #5 please."

"Yes Master Snape," Noelle said with a bow, then vanished again.

When Noelle brought the tea Snape poured Freddie a cup then poured one for himself as well.

"I have more potions to brew for the hospital wing this weekend. You can assist – _if _you've finished all of your homework," he said, sipping his tea.

"Well I have an essay to finish for McGonagall and I'm supposed to practice the Drought Charm for Flitwick's class," she said slowly.

"I suppose I will handle the potions myself then," he said in his low, silky voice.

"No no no," she said hastily. "I can help! I want to help. I'll do my essay first thing in the morning, then I'll work on the Drought Charm tomorrow night. How hard could it be?"

"Hmm," he said, placing his cup on the saucer. "You may do your essay here, tomorrow morning – unless you prefer working in your Common Room?"

"Are you kidding? All that noise? I'd much prefer the peace and quiet here. I can get it done in a jiffy," she declared.

He hid his smile behind his teacup and nodded slightly.

The more tea Freddie drank the drowsier she felt. She could taste the chamomile and valerian root and knew that Brew #5 must be a tea for sleep. She drained her cup and let out a loud yawn.

"Bed, little girl," Snape said, leaning across the desk to take the empty cup from her.

"But-" she began.

"No arguments. Don't make me give you detention," he warned.

She grinned sleepily at his threat. They both knew she wasn't scared of serving a detention with him. But she _was _tired. She stood up from the chair and stretched, yawning again.

"Alright," she said, picking up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. "I'll see you bright and early in the morning."

"Goodnight, Winifred," he said as she headed for the door.

"Goodnight Severus."

Freddie entered the Common Room with nothing but thoughts of her warm cozy bed in her mind. She was halfway across the room when she noticed a frantic-looking Amelia sitting at a table in the corner, her head bent low over a parchment, pink hair falling across her face.

"You okay kid?" Freddie yawned, approaching her friend.

Amelia jumped, knocking over an ink well as she did. She grabbed her parchment hastily, saving it from the ink that was spreading across the table.

"Freddie! I didn't even hear you come in," she said, rubbing her eyes tiredly.

"Whatcha working on?"

"Homework," Amelia said dully. "I'm drowning in it. Everyone warned me fifth year is a pain cuz of OWLs but _man_. I didn't expect this much work right off the bat!"

"Yeah it's rough. Haven't you been keeping up with it during the week?"

"Well, no, not exactly. I've been spending a lot of time with Brian and I thought I could just watch up on it this weekend...but I got assigned three more essays today! I'll never catch up!"

"You've got to keep on it during the week, don't let it pile up," she warned.

"What are you, my mom?" Amelia asked wryly, cleaning up the spilled ink with her wand.

"I'm serious, Amelia. I can't count how many people passed out or were hospitalized for nerves or exhaustion during my fifth year. I made a small fortune brewing Calming Draughts and Concentration brews around exam time," Freddie said, remembering her own OWL year with not-so-fond feelings.

Amelia looked miserably at the pile of books in front of her and ran her hands through her hair.

"Look," Freddie said kindly, stifling a yawn. "I've got to get up early to brew potions for the Hospital Wing with S- _Professor _Snape. But I'll try and help you with some of this tomorrow, maybe after lunch. I'll see if he can spare me for a couple of hours."

Privately she was thinking she'd much rather spend the time alone with Snape but Amelia was her friend and she looked close to tears.

"Seriously?" Amelia said weakly, looking up at her.

"Just this once, just to get you caught up. Then you _have _to stay on top of it, understand?"

"Yes, of course. Thanks, Freddie. You're a lifesaver."

She got up from her chair and hugged her. Freddie extricated herself from the hug and patted her shoulder awkwardly.

"You're welcome. Now, put this away and go get some sleep. You'll be able to tackle this much more effectively if you get a good night's sleep."

"Okay _mom_," Amelia said, rolling her eyes but grinned to let her know she was only teasing. Freddie smiled back and thought about helping her pack her things away but was interrupted by another yawn escaping her lips.

"I'll see you tomorrow. Night Amelia," she said, heading for her dorm.

"Night Freddie."

Freddie entered her room to the snoring of her bunk mates. She pulled the curtains around her bed and barely had the energy to change into her pajamas. Snape's tea was working its magic and she was asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillows.


	104. Chapter 104

#

Even though she went to bed late, Freddie was awake before anyone else in her dormitory. She'd set her watch for 5:30 and she dragged herself out of bed when the alarm went off. She rubbed her eyes sleepily, trying to remember why the _hell _she wanted to be up so early, then it hit her. This was her chance to spend time with Snape. They couldn't go home – _not home, _his _house, _she admonished herself – but they _would _be alone together. It was better than nothing.

She crept quietly into the bathroom so as not to wake anyone else. She got cleaned up and pondered what to wear. There was a slight chill in the air so she opted for warmer clothes. The Muggle jeans that made her butt look good. A black tank top with a green sweater over it that she could take off if she got too hot. She grabbed the cloak that had been Snape's and fastened it around her neck. She pushed her feet into her boots, and pulled her hair back into a ponytail, not wanting to take the time to braid it.

She got her Transfiguration book from her trunk and shoved it into her bag with her potion things. She checked her watch again. It was almost 6. Smiling she slung her bag over her shoulder and left the dormitory.

The castle was silent as she made her way down to Snape's office. She pulled the cloak tighter around her body against the dungeon chill.

_It's only September, it shouldn't be this cold, _she thought, shivering slightly. _Maybe that means it'll rain later. Would be a good chance to practice this Drought Charm for Flitwick. _

When she reached Snape's office she knocked on the door, out of courtesy more than anything. He didn't answer but she hadn't really expected him to. She glanced around the hallway to make sure she was alone, then drew her wand and removed the enchantment warding his door. She slipped inside the dark office and shut the door behind her. She aimed her wand at the fireplace and started a fire going before redoing the enchantment to seal the door.

She went and stood beside the fire, warming her hands, while she thought about what to do. She could start on the potions and wait for him to wake up – it's what she would have done last year – but she didn't even know what they were going to be brewing. Plus she was supposed to be doing her homework first.

She glanced at the hidden entrance to his quarters. She thought about knocking, waking him up. But that might be pushing it, she thought.

So she sat at his desk, in his chair, and dropped her bag on the floor beside her feet. She pulled out her Transfiguration book and the essay she'd started yesterday. She glanced at the hidden door once more before focusing on her work.

She'd written a few paragraphs when the hidden door slid open and Snape appeared. He was in his pajamas, his hair mussed from sleep, blinking at her. She'd seen him this way dozens of times before but the sight of him freshly awakened from sleep still made her heart skip a beat. She grinned at him and the corners of his mouth twitched in a smile.

"What are you doing, Gray?" he asked, his voice still thick with sleep.

"My homework, Professor," she said innocently. "You said I could work on it here this morning."

He squinted at her and looked at his watch.

"As I recall," he said. "Getting you to wake up before 10 am was a nearly impossible task over the summer when it was not, and I quote, 'a school day'."

"Well yeah but there's work to be done, right?" she asked, still grinning.

"Hmm. I'll get dressed," he said and Freddie started to stand up but he held up his finger. "No. Stay."

She smirked and sat back down. She hadn't really been going to follow him into his quarters but it was fun to tease him. He left the door open as he retreated into his dimly lit quarters. He was teasing her too.

She leaned back in the chair, craning her neck to see into his room. The only light came from the windows under the lake. In the dim green glow she got a glimpse of him removing his night shirt, his broad pale shoulders, before he shrugged on his shirt. Then he moved out of her line of sight. She sighed softly and looked back at her essay.

She read over what she'd written so far and made a few corrections, mostly fixing spelling errors she'd made because it was so early. Snape came out of his quarters fully dressed. With a flick of his wand the door to his quarters vanished behind a bookshelf.

"Out of my chair, little girl," he said, approaching her. She ignored him, scratching out a spot where she'd used the wrong 'to'.

She let out a yelp of surprise as he lifted the chair and tipped her unceremoniously onto the floor.

"Hey!" she shouted, scrambling to get to her feet. She picked up her essay and brushed it off. "That wasn't very nice!"

"I am not a nice man," he said, sitting down in the chair he'd dumper her out of.

"Hmph," she said, looking around for her quill. It was on the floor under his desk. She got down on her hands and knees and wedged herself between his legs and the desk.

"What do you think you're doing?" he asked, his voice a low throaty growl. She picked up her quill and straightened up on her knees, looking up at him from between his legs with a wicked grin on her face.

"Getting my quill," she said, her voice coming out in a whisper.

He growled softly and put his hands on her shoulders. For a moment she thought he was going to undo his pants, let her suck his cock, maybe even fuck her. He gripped her shoulders hard and she gasped – a mixture of pain and anticipation...then he yanked her up and pushed her away roughly.

"Sit," he said sternly, gesturing to the chair across from his desk. She walked around the desk, her legs feeling like jello, and sank into the chair, the quill still clutched in her hand.

"Winifred..." he said on slow exhale, steepling his hands in front of him on the desk. "You are making this extremely difficult."

She opened her mouth, intent on apologizing, then closed it again. She _could _say sorry but then that would be a lie. She wasn't sorry, not really. A part of her was still hoping that if he was a desperate as she was, he'd take her back to Spinner's End.

"I should send you back to your Common Room. I do not _need _your help," he said, a note of cruelness in his voice that hadn't been directed at her in quite some time.

"No!" she exclaimed quickly, almost jumping to her feet. "No, please. I- I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'll be good. I promise, I'll be good."

"Hmm," he said and rubbed his hand across his face. He massaged his temples as if she were giving him a headache. He didn't speak for several minutes and Freddie sat on the edge of her seat, wondering what he was thinking. It was impossible to read him when he wasn't in her head and she knew better than to try and enter his without permission. That would get her thrown out of his office for sure.

"Please," she tried again, her voice gentle and pleading. "Please don't make me leave. I'll be a good girl."

This seemed to break his resolve and he let out a grunt, sinking back into his chair.

"Noelle," he barked, causing her to jump slightly. The elf appeared with a crack, trembling slightly.

"Yes Master Snape?"

"Yea," he said sharply. "For myself and Miss Gray."

"Yes Master Snape," Noelle squeaked. "Shall Noelle brings breakfasts too? It is very nearly ready."

"Yes fine," he snapped. "Dismissed."

Freddie gave the elf an apologetic look before she disappeared with a crack.

"I'm sorry," Freddie whispered again, looking not at Snape but at the desk between them. She didn't want to meet his gaze lest she find his eyes full of anger. He was in a bad mood now and it was all her fault.

"I'm not angry," he said sharply and she jumped again. She didn't know he was in her mind. In her mind but keeping his own thoughts and emotions blocked from her.

"I am not angry, Winifred," he said again, lowering his voice. "I am frustrated. You must understand. This is not any easier for me than it is for you."

She nodded slightly, still not daring to look up at him. She picked her essay up off the desk and pretended to read it until Noelle returned with a tray of food and another with tea. Freddie got up and busied herself with helping the elf set the plates down on Snape's desk.

"Okay if I move these, Professor?" Freddie asked, indicating a stack of papers that prevented Noelle from being able to set the tea tray down. Snape grunted indifferently and Freddie shifted the stack of essays to the edge of the desk.

"Is there anything else you is requiring Master Snape?" Noelle asked and Snape gave a sharp jerk of his head. "Mistress Gray?"

"No, thank you, Noelle."

The elf bowed deeply to each of them then disappeared again. Snape poured himself a cup of tea and began to drink, not bothering to pour hers. Freddie felt slightly wounded as she leaned across the desk to fix her own cup. She added sugar to her tea, ignoring his grimace. She stirred it in and settled back in her chair to finish proof-reading her essay.

When she'd read through it she leaned across the desk to get her book so she could continue working on it.

"You should eat," Snape said, putting his hand on the textbook so she couldn't pull it away. "Before the eggs get cold."

"I'm not hungry," she muttered and when he didn't release her book she slumped back in her chair. She stared at the cup in her hand. She watched in her peripheral as Snape fixed a plate with scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage and biscuits, then pushed it towards her.

"Eat, Winifred," he said softly and she could tell he was trying to gentle his tone. She nodded slightly and straightened up in her seat. She scooted forward and began to eat.

"So," she said after swallowing a mouthful of eggs. "What potions do we have to brew for Madam Pomfrey?"

"Calming Draught," he said, accepting the change of subject easily as he cut a piece of sausage on his own plate. "Wound-Cleaning Potion and Cough Tonic."

"That'll keep us busy," she said with a nod.

"Indeed. Have you completed your essay?"

"Very nearly. Ten, fifteen minutes tops," she said, popping a bit of sausage in her mouth.

"Good."

They ate in silence for several minutes and the tension between them seemed to melt away. Freddie washed down the last of her breakfast with a gulp of rapidly-cooling tea, careful not to disturb the mandrake leaf in her mouth.

"Can you spare me for a bit after lunch? Amelia needs a bit of help with her homework. Fifth year, you know."

"Ah. Miss Burke should do a better job of staying on top of things."

"Exactly what I told her last night, but she was nearly in tears at the mountain of homework in front of her. Poor thing."

"_Teenagers_," he scoffed. "I suppose she has her mind on boys rather than books."

"Just the one boy I think," Freddie said with a smirk. "And believe me, it's not a mistake she'll make twice. I've told her I'll only bail her out the once."

"I should hope not," he said, clearing away their empty plates.

"So is it alright with you if I leave for a bit after lunch?"

"Fine," he said with a dismissive wave of his left hand while he poured more tea with his right. "Finish your essay, Winifred. I will collect the ingredients and get the potions started."

"Yes sir."


	105. Chapter 105

**Author's Note: Finally another update for you guys. I keep apologizing for not updating as frequently as I once did, but I'll finish this eventually. Also it's officially been over a year since I first started writing this! I can't believe it! Thank you all for sticking with me this long. I really appreciate it. **

**~RedPandaPrincess**

Freddie spent the rest of the day in the dungeons with Snape, save for the two hours she spent after lunch helping Amelia with her homework. She was careful to keep her distance from Snape, not wanting to upset him or risk having him angry at her again.

It was late that afternoon, almost dinnertime, when there was a knock on the office door. Freddie was in the lab, adding more Dittany to the Wound-Cleansing Potion, when she heard it. She looked to the outer office where Snape sat at his desk, grading papers.

"You give someone detention already?" she asked, picking up the ladle to stir the cauldron.

"No," he said, frowning slightly as he stood from his desk. "Stay there."

Freddie watched curiously as he went to the door and opened it. She craned her head to see the enormous form of the groundskeeper Hagrid taking up the doorway. He had something cupped in his giant hands that she couldn't see.

"Professor Snape, I'm glad yer here," he said, a note of urgency in his voice. "I need yer help."

"What is it, Hagrid? I have three potions brewing. I am busy."

"Look," Hagrid said, showing Snape what was in his hands. "Newt Scamander brought 'im to me this morning to take care o' – he's going abroad ye see and won't 'ave time to tend 'im. But 'e won't eat, you see, and he's weak. Professor Kettleburn suggested I come ter see you. Do ye have some kind o' Strengthenin' Solution that might help 'im? I don't think he'll survive the night without it."

Snape scrutinized the creature that Hagrid held then turned his head towards the lab.

"Miss Gray," he called loudly and she hurried out, curious to see what Hagrid held. "Hagrid, this is my Potions apprentice, Winifred Gray."

"Aye, I remember ye, Freddie. You were Daniel's best friend. 'E used ter come by my hut all the time an' help me with me animals a bit."

"Yes sir," Freddie said a bit stiffly. She hadn't been to Hagrid's hut since Daniel disappeared.

"Sure do miss him," Hagrid said sadly. "I know ye do too. So does Fang. You should come ter see us sometime."

"Uh..."

"I believe Miss Gray can help you Hagrid," Snape said smoothly, stepping aside. Hagrid lowered his hands to reveal an impossibly small kitten. Freddie sucked in a breath of surprise.

"Is that-?" she gasped.

"A kneazle kit," Hagrid confirmed. "He's only a few days old. An ol' friend brough 'im ter me. The mother rejected it ye see."

"Oh my goodness," she breathed. "He's so small."

"Newt said to feed 'im every four hours but I haven' been able to get 'im ter eat anythin'. He hasn' been movin either. He was mewin and all at first but he's gone quiet now and won' rouse."

"Can I see him?" she asked, holding her hands out. "What have you been feeding him?"

"Jus' regular milk," he said, transferring the kitten into her hands. "I thought ye mught 'ave somethin' ter help get his strength up."

"I have a few ideas," she said with a nod, her mind already forming a plan. "Can I keep him? I promise I'll take care of him. I love kneazles."

"I dunno," Hagrid said doubtfully. "Newt gave 'im ter me to tend."

Freddie couldn't help but wonder if he'd be so reluctant if Daniel was there.

"Show him your Patronus," Snape suggested quietly.

Freddie held the kit carefully in one hand – he was so small he could fit comfortably in just one palm – and drew her wand. She focused on a happy memory – lying in bed with Snape the morning of September 1st before she left for the train. How he had kept pulling her back into bed.

"Expecto Patronum," she said with a flick of her wrist.

The shining kneazle patronus erupted from the tip of her wand. It bounded around the room, then came back to the doorway and wound itself between Hagrid's tree trunk sized legs.

"Well now," the giant said softly.

"My wand core is also kneazle whisker," Freddie said confidently. "and I'm in the process of becoming an Animagus. Since my patronus is a kneazle, my animagus form should be too."

"Can' argue with tha'. I reckon ye were meant ter have 'im, Freddie."

"I'll take care of him," she promised, stowing her wand away as her Patronus disappeared. "You have nothing to worry about."

"Alrigh'. Thanks, Freddie. Let me know if there's anythin' ye need, anythin' I can do to help."

"Yes sir. Thank you."

Hagrid nodded his bushy head and left. Snape shut the door behind him then turned to Freddie who was gazing tenderly at the kitten, stroking its head with one finger.

"Now what are you going to do with it?" he asked.

"Now," she said confidently. "I need to go to London."


	106. Chapter 106

"London?" Snape repeated. "What on earth for?"

"I have a friend, Matt, at Magical Menagerie in London who could help. He probably knows some way to get the baby to eat."

"We can't go to London this late," Snape said, looking at his watch. "It's-"

"It's not even dark out yet, it's just now dinnertime."

"I'd have to speak to Dumbledore-"

"I'll ask him myself," she said haughtily, getting her bag and slinging it over one shoulder. "You heard Hagrid, this kneazle won't survive the night if he doesn't eat and I _promised I'd_ take of him, with or without your help! Now I'm _going _to talk to Dumbledore and I'm _going _to save this kitten!"

She knew she was being harsh but she felt extremely protective of the tiny kitten in her hands. She wasn't going to let him die, not on her watch.

She left Snape standing in his office looking perplexed. She hurried to her dorm, which was empty. Everyone was at dinner and the headmaster most likely was too. She left her book bag and got her money pouch from her trunk. She shrugged on her thick traveling cloak and held the baby close to her chest as she left the Common Room. She found Snape waiting in the corridor outside the Common Room.

"That was quite a dramatic exit," he drawled, following her as she headed for the stairs.

"You're coming with me?" she asked, noting that he had his traveling cloak on.

"I put a stasis spell on our potions," he said with a curt nod, following her. "We'll have to stay up late to finish them."

She took the stairs out of the dungeon two at a time. She knew every second counted and she didn't want to waste a moment. Snape caught up with her in the Entrance Hall. They were about to enter the Great Hall when a booming voice spoke from the Grand Staircase.

"Looks like I'm not the only one late for dinner, Severus," said Dumbledore with a laugh, his star-spangled robes flowing around him as he came down the stairs.

"Headmaster," Snape acknowledged with a nod. "Actually, we were looking for you."

"Oh? Hello, Miss Gray, how are you?"

"I'm fine, Professor," she assured him. "However..." she opened her hands to show him the kitten.

"Oh my. That's a kneazle, is it not?"

"Yes sir," Freddie answered and quickly explained the situation. Dumbledore listened without interrupting, not moving except to pet the kneazle kitten's head.

"So you see, sir, I thought I could go to London. I have a friend who works at the store Magical Menagerie. He takes care of all sorts of animals, I thought he might have some idea of how to help."

"You want to go to London tonight?" Dumbledore asked, raising one eyebrow.

"Yes sir. I really don't think he'll last the night without help," she said desperately. The little furry body in her hands was already growing cooler in the night air that was drifting into the hall.

"I'm afraid you may be right, Miss Gray," he said somberly. "Very well. You have my permission to travel to London this evening...so long as someone accompanies you. Severus? I trust you're not too busy to escort Miss Gray to London."

"We have several potions brewing," he said slowly and Freddie glared at him from behind Dumbledore's back. "but I have placed stasis spells on them and they can be left unattended until we return."

"Excellent," Dumbledore said, clapping his hands together. "I suggest you use the fireplace in your office to floo to London. It would be unwise to attempt Apparition with the little one being so weak."

"Yes Headmaster. Come along, Winifred," Snape said, sweeping her back towards the dungeons.

"Good luck, Miss Gray," Dumbledore called cheerfully. "Do let me know how it turns out."

"Thank you, Severus," she said quietly as she followed him back down the steps. He nodded silently. When they reached his office he shut the door behind them and placed the charms that warded his door.

"I hope that your friend can help," he said as he got the floo powder from the shelf.

"Me too," she murmured, holding the kitten close to her chest.


	107. Chapter 107

Freddie stepped out of the fireplace into the noisy atmosphere of the Leaky Cauldron. It was a Saturday night so the bar was full of witches and wizards milling about, eating and drinking. Snape bumped into her as he stepped out of the hearth behind her.

"Sorry," she said, quickly stepping aside. He grunted in acknowledgment and led the way to the back room of the bar. The archway to Diagon Alley was already open as a young couple came through into the bar.

It was raining in the alley and Snape pulled out his wand, casting a nonverbal spell to deflect the rain. The spell kept the rain off both of them as they stepped out of the bar. Freddie shivered slightly in the cool night air. She pulled her cloak around the hand that held the kitten.

"Lead the way," Snape said, linking his arm with her free one.

The streets were more or less deserted as they walked down the sidewalk. The few people that were out and about were darting quickly into shops, trying to avoid the downpour. Rain sloshed around their feet and soaked Freddie's boots clear through to her socks, but she didn't care. Her only focus was on keeping the kitten warm and dry.

The lanterns on posts that lined the street sprang magically to life as the sky darkened. As they approached Magical Menagerie, Freddie quickened her pace. When they reached the door her heart stopped. There was a Closed sign hanging in the window.

"Nooo," she cried, dismayed. "What do we do now? He's gonna die!"

"Remain calm, Winifred," Snape said smoothly, checking his watch. "It's only 6:08. The shop closed at 6. More than likely your friend is still here."

"Oh!" she said and began to pound loudly on the door with her free hand. "Hello? Matt? It's an emergency!"

She kept knocking until the lock clicked and the door swung open.

"Well well. Nice to see you again. You looking for a place to hide again?" Matt asked, grinning at her. Snape arched an eyebrow at her and she shook her head.

"No, Matt, I need your help. It's an emergency," she said, revealing the small kitten.

"Oh my," he murmured. "Come in, come in. Quickly. I'll get the fire going again and we'll warm this little one up. I'm glad you caught me, I was just about to head home for the night," he said, using his wand to light the fireplace and candles as they entered the shop. "Where on Earth did you find him?"

"Well you know I'm still at school, my last year – actually this is Professor Snape, my Head of House and Potions Master," she quickly introduced.

"Nice to meet you. Matthew Booth, everyone calls me Matt."

Snape acknowledged him with a nod.

"Anyway, the groundskeeper Hagrid brought the kneazle to me. He thought we could give him a Strengthening Solution or something. But I didn't want to give him anything without checking with you first, I thought you might have an idea of what to do."

"I know Hagrid. He's a good man. Comes into my shop from time to time," he said, pulling a blanket out of a drawer and unfolding it on the counter top. "Bring him over here, let's have a look."

Freddie brought the kitten over and placed him gently on the fuzzy blue blanket. He didn't move. If it wasn't for the barely-perceptive rise and fall of his chest she might've thought he was dead.

Matt did a physical examination of the kitten, palpating him with his fingers, then checking him out with his wand.

"When was the last time he ate?"

"Yesterday, according to Hagrid," she said, biting her lower lip anxiously.

"Do you know what he was feeding him?"

"Cows milk."

"That's no good," Matt said, clicking his tongue. "Come on, I've got some supplies in the back room."

He scooped the kitten up in the blanket and Freddie followed him through a door into the back room. Snape, who had been looking at a green snake in a tank, turned and followed them as well. There was already a fire going in the fireplace and the room was warm. There were a few cages lining the walls that contained various sleeping animals.

Matt placed the kitten on a table and Freddie stood next to it, stroking the kitten's small furry head while Matt moved around the room gathering items.

"He's small, even for a newborn," he said as he worked. "The mother probably rejected him because he's a runt. Sometimes with runts their lungs or brains are underdeveloped but physically this little guy is just fine. He just needs a little extra TLC."

He opened an icebox and removed 2 bottles, one smaller than the other. He placed them on the table next to the kitten. Freddie could see the larger of the two bottles was milk. The other contained a shimmering silver liquid.

"What potion is that?" Freddie asked curiously. "I don't recognize it."

"That's not a potion," Snape said softly, joining them at the table. "Is that what I think it is, Mr Booth?"

"Unicorn milk," Matt confirmed with a nod. "It is _extremely _rare. It's almost impossible to get near a mother unicorn but I have an herbalist friend, Angela, who is able to get it for me on occasion. The unicorns trust her. She lives in a small cottage in the woods and she plants special grass for them to graze on."

He uncorked the bottle and used a dropper to draw up a few drops.

"A kitten should eat about 8 milliliters per ounce of body weight a day. This little guy weighs a little under 2 oz, so he needs 16mL a day. If you feed him every 4 hours, that's 6 feedings a day so...he needs between 2-3 mL every feeding to start with. Here," he said, handing Freddie the dropped. "I'll let you do the honors, since you're the one he'll be bonded to."

Freddie bit her lower lip as she held the dropper out in front of the kitten. He didn't move. She stroked his head with one finger and put the tip of the dropper in his mouth. He stirred a bit but then he was still again.

"He's not eating," she said sadly.

"Never fear, I have a few more tricks up my sleeve," Matt said hurrying over to open a cabinet above the sink.

"What if he won't eat?" Freddie murmured, looking up at Snape. He said nothing but put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed lightly. She felt comforted by the warmth of his hand that seemed to almost burn her skin, even though her layers of clothes. She leaned into his touch but he dropped his hand and stepped away from her as Matt came back over with a jar.

"Let's see, a bit of honey on the tip might be just the encouragement he needs," Matt said, opening the jar. He dipped his finger in the jar, smeared some honey on the dropper, then handed it back to Freddie.

"Try it again," he encouraged.

Freddie took a steadying breath and placed the dropper in the kitten's mouth again. For a minute she thought it wouldn't work...then the kitten began to suck on the dropper and she let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding.

"Well done, Miss Gray," Snape said softly.

"Well done indeed!" Matt said, beaming.

"Thank you," she said, unable to suppress a grin. She watched, fascinated, as the baby slowly drank the milk from the dropper.

"You'll want to give him the unicorn milk for the first few days. I can give you 2 ounces, just put a Cooling Charm on it to keep it from spoiling. After that start him on goats milk," he said, indicating the larger bottle. "Not cows milk, that's really bad for cats and kneazles. They don't digest it well. You can add a drop of Strengthening Solution to the goats milk, just make sure its diluted. Be sure you weigh him every few days and adjust his feedings accordingly. You can use this when he gets a little bigger." He placed a bottle on the counter, like a small baby bottle.

"When will he open his eyes?" she asked curiously, watching as the kitten drained the last of the milk from the dropper.

"A week, give or take a few days."

"Well hello there little one," Freddie murmured as the kitten began to move around the blanket. She stroked him with one finger and he let out the tiniest of mews that melted her heart. "Oh my goodness, look at you. Sweet baby... He looks stronger already!"

"That's the unicorn milk," Matt said with a nod, smiling. "It has amazing restorative properties, as well as vitamins and nutrients that are hard to come by."

"Is it safe for him to consume?" Snape spoke up. "I've never heard of anyone drinking unicorn milk."

"Oh absolutely, Professor. I've done quite a bit of research on the subject. It isn't anything like drinking the blood. The creature isn't harmed when the milk is obtained, it is given in a particular circumstance that requires a deep level of trust."

Snape nodded thoughtfully.

"I'll bag these up for you," Matt said, getting a brown paper bag from under the counter. He put the bottles into it, then took the dropped to the sink and rinsed it out before adding it to the bag. "Oh, and one more thing you might find useful. I'll be right back."

Matt disappeared into the front room. Snape walked back over to the counter where Freddie was watching the kitten snuggle into the blanket.

"Isn't he just precious?" she crooned, smiling up at Snape.

"Mm. I did not think you were the type of girl who fawned over small animals," he replied with a faint smirk.

"But just look at him! Besides, he's a kneazle. You know I have a thing for kneazles."

"Of course," he said. "Have you chosen a name for him yet?"

"No, I need to think about it for a bit. I just want to make sure he's going to be alright."

"He will be," Snape said confidently. "He has you."

Freddie flushed with pleasure and grinned up at him, wishing she could hug him. Snape's dark eyes met hers for a brief moment, then he glanced away.

"He seems better already," he said, looking at the kitten. He had curled up on the blanket and was sleeping.

"Here we are," Matt said, coming back through the door. "This might be useful – it's a bag, lined with rabbit fur. You can wear it around your neck and use it to carry him while he's small. It'll help keep him warm and it's good to keep him close to you. The mothers rarely leave their kits side for the first two weeks. This will help you bond with him."

"Oh wow, thank you," Freddie said, putting the back around her neck. "Thank you so much."

She opened it then carefully picked up the kitten. He squirmed slightly and let out a soft mew.

"It's okay, little one," she murmured, placing him gently in the bag. "You'll be perfectly safe and warm in here."

The kitten squirmed for a minute then settled down.

"Thank you so much, Matt. I can't thank you enough. How much do I owe you?"

"Eh, don't worry about it. I'm happy to help out a fellow animal lover," he said with a wave of his hand.

"I have to give you something," she insisted, pulling out her money pouch. "The unicorn milk alone must be worth a fortune."

"It's fine. I get it for free in exchange for taking care of Angela's animals."

"Take this," she said, pressing several gold coins into his hand. "I really appreciate your help and everything you do here."

"Anytime," he said, pocketing the coins. "If you have any other questions you can drop by any time, or send me an owl."

"Thank you," Freddie said, shaking his hand. Snape picked up the bag of supplies, nodded to Matt, then the two of them left the shop with the kitten sleeping peacefully in the bag against Freddie's chest.


End file.
